July 25, 2024 • 29 mins
Ever wondered why your teenager's mood can switch faster than a light bulb? Join us as we slip into "dad mode" and share our humorous, sometimes frustrating, attempts to connect with our teens. From a rare day out at a luxury cinema to the mixed reactions they had to new clothes, we'll take you through the unpredictability of teenage attitudes. Listen in as we recount the moments when our kids retreat to their rooms despite our best efforts to engage them—and the fleeting victories when they finally show some interest.
But that's not all! We dive into the growth spurts and social changes our kids face, comparing the differences between siblings and how introverted and extroverted personalities navigate social events. We'll also share the lighter side of teaching teens about work ethic, filled with sneaky ice cream runs and the unexpected twists that accompany their first jobs. Whether you're a parent in the trenches or just looking for a good laugh, this episode offers a relatable and entertaining look at the rollercoaster ride that is parenting.
Josh aka Bearded_Nova
I'm from Australia and am what you would call a father who games. I have 5 kids so not as much time to game as I used to. But I still game and stream when I can. So come join me on Twitch in chat as we chill out.
Business Inquiries: Bearded-n0va@aussiebb.com.au
Josh aka Moorph
I'm a US-based husband and father of two boys. I work full-time and have been a content creator since 2000. I'm a YouTube partner, Twitch and LiveSpace streamer who founded a content creation coaching company called Elev8d Media Group (elev8d.media). I'm a blogger, streamer, podcaster, and video-er(?).
Business Inquiries: josh@elev8d.media
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Turning off normal human male mode.
Switching to dad mode.
Welcome in to dad mode Withyour hosts Bearded, Nova and
Morph.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
I ask people what it's like when you have
teenagers.
They say think about what itwas like when you were a
teenager, but I was perfect, soI don't think there was anything
weird there.
But since you have three or twoand you have more coming like,
what kind of changes do you see?
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Attitude.
It's just attitude, but youshouldn't be seeing that by now.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Like just a snappiness is the best way to
put it you don't know whathappened, oh it's okay, we're
both really sarcastic.
Yeah, my oldest just pickedthat up.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
I think there's a level of it goes from sarcasm to
just rudeness, though you knowwhat I mean.
Like they at that age, theycross that line where they're
not being sarcastic, it's justrude Constantly.
You're like pick your attitude.
You know what I mean.
I think, like Wednesday, justgo on.
(01:11):
The wife had a great idea tohave the day off, but both of us
just put an annual leave andhad the day off.
Work.
No kids, they're all gone toschool daycare.
We went to the movies, watchedthe new Quiet Place film.
You know we went into like theluxury cinema so you get the hot
(01:33):
food as well.
So you know, I got the pizzasand like three different types
of popcorn and fucking, you knowwe're loaded up with food.
But where the cinema was?
We'd never been to that onebefore, but it's attached to
they call it D dfo here, whichis like a direct factory outlet.
So it's like a.
It's like a, a mall full ofretailers and it's where they
(01:56):
send all their older stock.
But like the stuff like you'renot going, unites that are no
longer but they've still gotsurplus of it goes there.
It's discounted.
Yeah, we actually have it too.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So that's where the cinema is.
It's in the middle of this.
So afterwards we decided to gowalk around and have a look at
everything and while we werethere we were in the Nike store
(02:20):
and I got some new Jordans,actually like three pairs for
like $100, which is cheap, asbecause I don't buy myself
anything normally Like I'mpretty happy not to buy it.
But I was wearing my Air Maxesand I forgot how comfortable of
a shoe they are and I've hadthem for like four years.
I mainly wear work boots.
You're probably the same.
(02:41):
You've got shoes that youhardly ever wear, yep, but they
last forever.
So there's no point of buying anew pair of shoes because you
still got the one from years ago.
And so I've gone around there.
These shoes are reallycomfortable.
I remember that saw some jordans.
The wife's like you should geta pair, and I'm like okay, and
then I'm looking at them like Idon't know what one I want to
own because obviously they'regoing to last me probably until
(03:04):
I retire.
Now at the rate I go throughshoes, ended up buying all three
.
But while we were there, youknow, I saw some pants and she's
like, oh, we should get thekids some pants, like some like
workout pants, but you know thecomfortable pants you can wear
around everywhere.
So she goes we'll just getthese tights for the girls.
So I said, okay, so we've gotthat home.
12-year-old happy this is great.
(03:24):
Love them, puts them on,feeling good.
16-year-old.
It was like attitude towards it,and that's what I mean by the
teenage attitude.
It's like you know, I said tomy wife later I'm like well, why
react like that?
You got something for nothing.
There was no reason for us to.
It wasn't you needed them, itwas purely a nice thing.
(03:47):
Going, hey, we'll just buythese, yeah for you.
Yeah, there you go, surprise,and then you get attitude for
stuff like that.
That's the teenage.
You don't know what you've done, what brought it on.
It just yep, something likethat happens and that's what
you're going to put up with.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
Yeah yeah, I mean like right now, like I pick him
up from camp or when I get himfrom school.
Yeah, he walks in the house,immediately goes to his room.
I do not see him again unlessthere's dinner.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
Yeah, that's normal.
I just expect that for yearsnow.
That's just the standard.
Yeah, I mean like yeah, yeah,yeah, unless they want to come
out and annoy like a sibling ordo something.
They're like just you know.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
I think I find it frustrating because, like now
that he's older and I can havelike a real conversation with
him about stuff, now he doesn'twant to hang around.
You know what I mean.
So it's like but you just gotgood.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Yeah, I know you gotinteresting.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
You do good stuff.
I was just saying, yeah, my son, you know getting into
basketball and things like that.
I'm like, oh cool, we can godown to the basketball court now
and play ball.
Yeah, like that's not cool.
I even brought a hoop and setit up in the backyard, made sure
it was regulation height.
I was like you know, let's justkeep you practicing your
shooting.
I'm not going to sit you on acourt that's not high enough,
(05:05):
because we want to set it to thesame height as you're playing.
So you've got that musclememory, etc.
Yeah, it doesn't get used.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
No, no, we did the same thing.
We set up a basketball hoopbecause I had one growing up.
I use it all the time.
So we moved to this house.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
We got one, set it up up.
They use it a bunch the firstsummer and then, like the last
three summers, barely barelypossible.
It's growing up.
I'm going to bring up a storyof mine.
All my friends had a lot ofdifferent basketball hoops set
up in their yards growing up.
It was cool going over there tofriends and doing that.
I really wanted one.
Yeah, this is we're talkingabout primary schools, you know
early, early school.
So I really wanted one.
Parents brought me this reallycool Charlotte Hornets it wasn't
(05:48):
even a team that I wasfollowing back then, but it was
the 90s, you know and they gotme a Hornets board.
It looked really cool.
That thing got hung up finallyto use when my son was three
years old.
My parents carried this thingaround for like 20 years in the
shed.
I was waiting for the day forit to go up.
(06:09):
It never went up anywhere untilmy son was like three and then
they hung it up about I don'tknow a few feet off the ground
it wasn't that much and then Ithink someone ran around the
corner and hit the side andbroke it, so like it didn't last
long.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
It basically lasted long enough to deteriorate on
the time did you ask like whydidn't you hang this up when I
was a kid?
Speaker 3 (06:31):
I did just yeah, we'll get to.
It just never happened.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
I just gave up on the idea you know, what's funny is
like my mom treats my, my kids,so much better than I treated
growing up, like she's alwaysaround and like she and she
built a play scape thing forthem and they're always getting
donuts and ice cream and crap.
Where did this person come from?
Speaker 3 (06:55):
Because I don't care.
I tell my wife all the time Ican't wait to be a grandparent
more than I can be a parent,because I know the rules are out
.
There's no rules when you're agrandparent.
That's when it's time to like,just be a totally different
person.
It's like a new level to fuckwith your kids in the head.
Really, you know what I mean.
You're just, you're fun.
(07:16):
All of a sudden You're like youknow, let's have a soft.
You go into bed, drink somesoft drink, soft drink.
Going around everywhere there'sfucking bags of lollies.
You don't care, let's watch thewhole series.
Exactly, not allowed out atnight.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
We're going to the city my wife keeps saying when
the boys have kids, I don't wantto do that, but now, if I can
fuck with them a little bit more, I'll do that.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
it's a new level.
You get to be this person thatthey just look at and it
frustrates them.
You know what I mean.
Like I watch my parents, youwatch it with your mom, I watch
it with my mom.
It frustrates you a little bit.
It's like why do you get toundo everything that we do as
parents, right, and care yeah.
And don't care.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I remember specifically, I was like Mom,
please don't do this thing, youknow, with the boys or whatever.
And of course she's likewhatever, and then she'll do it
anyway.
Yeah, yeah so.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
I remember I picked up two of the girls Wednesday
with my mom and for a couple ofdays, and then I got there and
you know they were talking aboutthings.
I'm like, oh, what did you have?
You know, we had nuggets andchips.
This night we had that and I wehad ice cream for breakfast.
Blah, blah, blah.
And I'm like, oh cool, did youhave any fruit?
Did you, did you eat any fruit?
And one of the children lookedme dead in the eye and said I
(08:42):
drank cordial which is, I guess,like Kool-Aid, basically,
basically, because it was afruit flavored drink.
That's acceptable level offruit intake for my children,
apparently, while they werethere.
Yeah, they'll go to, they'll goto like a dessert.
There's a couple of restaurantsover here that only just do
desserts type of thing.
Yeah, and they'll go out andhave lunch or dinner would just
(09:03):
be a dessert bar, you know,that's, that's the stuff my mom.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
I'm not going to lie.
I kind of want to hang out withyour parents.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
Yeah, she's just.
Let's let them do what shewants.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Wow.
Well, yeah, and I think we'vetalked before how I also can't
wait until the boys like, gettheir own apartment.
I can't wait.
And people might be thinking,oh, you want them to move out.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
No, Because I never going to move out of home, like
I always thought the oldest is.
Just she's just going to be theone that's here forever, type
of thing.
She just never leave the nestand I always assumed 12 year old
(09:48):
would do that as well.
If she'd leave, she'd be prettyquickly to get out.
But we're going through a stagethat I like to call grandma
hands.
That she has, where she has thestrength and grip and posture of
like a 90-year-old, so shecan't actually do anything with
her hands.
It's like if you're asking herto wipe, it's like this real
(10:11):
like no pressure on the clothbut the hand is just barely
touching it.
She can't open jars, she can'topen anything.
Like she's just got these hands.
She's just frail and weak and Irealized the other night that
she's probably not moving outeither, unless she has a carer
attached to her, because shecouldn't get ice cream out of
the tub.
Like you have to wait for herolder sister to do it, because
(10:33):
it was just the spoon and theice cream was too much for her
hands.
It's 12.
Yeah, it's just like that.
But you just see, you can seeit in the grip that there's just
no force or anything behindanything that she's doing.
It's like you can.
I don't know if she feels likeshe's the Incredible Hulk or
something where she's unaware ofher full potential and it feels
(10:54):
like she'll crush everythingunless she withholds her own
power, right.
But, that's not the case.
It's really not the case.
I keep telling her don't worry,I don't think you're going to
break anything.
Yeah, but she's not moving outeither.
Now I'm stuck with two kidsapparently so my oldest.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
He turns 13 in October.
He is two inches shorter.
I'm 5'10".
He's two inches shorter than meand he's now moved up to men's
medium for clothes.
He's a big kid, so he hasn'treally hit his growth spurt yet.
He's going to be way tallerthan me and every now and then
he likes picking up his brother,who's like 65 pounds, and I'm
(11:33):
like, hey, can you go get a bagof pellets from the shed?
It's like 40 pounds.
I don't think I can lift it.
Yes, you can.
He'll pull the ice cream thing.
I can't scoop it out.
Dad, I'm like you're as big asme.
Yes, you can, you can.
I'm still holding a rank in myhouse for hot.
Are you still playing?
I am for now, obviously, but itwon't be long.
(11:56):
I'm thinking by the end of nextyear.
Easily he'll be past me, butI'm not worried at all.
He'll make his little jokes butat the end of the day he
realizes I could kick him out.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
I think the sun's probably going to get me.
I feel like he'll pit me onsome 5'11".
He's probably going to pit me.
I don't know where he'sstanding in height, but every
time I see him he looks likehe's, you know, taller and
taller.
The eldest.
I feel like she may have justhit her last growth spurt,
because girls, they have theirgrowth spurt earlier than men.
(12:29):
Yeah, so they kind of finishthat mid-high schools.
You know where they stop really.
So I feel like she's maybepopped hers.
The other two girls maybe onemight be tall.
I feel like one's going to betall, the other one won't be.
And then little Dakota we foundout the other day because we had
to go get her 12-month needlesand they do like you check your
(12:54):
weight and your height to makesure the progression's going
right.
She's like a five percentile inheight and weight, so she's
tiny.
I really don't think that'sgoing to change.
I think she's just going tostay short forever.
I don't even think she's goingto get taller than her mom and
that's, that's saying something.
(13:14):
But that's probably a goodthing for my wife.
I tell her that I'm like, heylook, you might have one child
that's not tall.
Then, yeah, she thinks that's abad thing.
I'm trying to put a spin it ina good way yeah, so my boys
couldn't be more different.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
So my oldest is he's like in the 90th percentile for
height.
Yeah, my youngest is in likethe 10th or 15th yeah, I mean
and he's, he's turning 11, sohe's just gonna be a little dude
.
Yeah, he's a little dude likewe keep.
We tell, hey, you know, don'tworry, you'll hit your bro spurt
, and I'm like, yeah, you'll belike five, five, five, six maybe
(13:47):
.
Yeah, because I don't think thepercentiles really change all
that much.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
No, once you kind of stick to a path.
Then the percentiles, I believeit turned out.
I didn't realize, but it's aworldwide thing.
So our growth chart's the sameas your growth chart, et cetera.
It's a World HealthOrganization.
Most people I personallythought that every country would
have different growth charts toa degree.
(14:13):
You know what I mean.
Yeah, obviously they're justlooking at it as a worldwide
thing instead of as a nationthing.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
So yeah, um.
Speaker 3 (14:21):
So you're saying, going back to teenagers growing
up, changes, introvert orextrovert children.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Oh, my oldest is an introvert.
I think my youngest is more ofan extrovert because he loves
talking to people.
He hates being by himself.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Okay.
Okay, because I was going to saythat I think that changes we
talked about us being teenagersand just never being home, being
ghosts, you know disappeared inthe world of our parents' eyes.
And both my two daughters hereat home the older two they're
both very introvert, like wejust had vacation, two weeks
school vacation, because that'show our school system works and
(15:00):
I think we saw no, I'm prettyconfident, neither girl actually
saw either none of theirfriends for the entire two weeks
.
They may have talked to them onthe phone, but that's kind of
like their happy places to livein the cave, the smelly cave
that they live in their room andjust message, text message, if
that's as much of a social lifeas that they need, whereas my
(15:23):
13-year-old son he's as much ashe's a gamer and likes doing
things he likes still gamingwith a mate at either their
house or they're coming over.
So he's still got that.
Yeah, I personally feel like itdoes have a little bit to do
with their attitude.
You know how much socialinteraction, as much as they can
, you know, introvert or not, Istill feel like kids still need
(15:45):
that social interaction or elsethey get grumpy, I guess is the
best way to put it and, as Isaid, my two stay at home
majority of the time, but themoment they spend a bit of time
with friends or go do that,they've got a slight attitude
change, for a couple of days atleast.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Yeah, I'm not a fan of big social things Like I, my,
my company had a picnic todayand you know I have to like work
myself up to get to go to itand interact with people for two
hours it's it's.
I remember walking up and I'mabout to open, or walk around
the corner where everybody is,and she said I took this deep
breath in All right, here we go.
(16:21):
You know, oh God, I hate it.
And then I stood in the samegeneral spot for the whole two
hours, or two and a half hours.
I was there because I knew if Iwalked anywhere else I'd have
to talk to more people.
So I know they're like you wantto go get something to eat?
I'm like no, because then Ihave to talk to all the people
that are over there.
So I'm going to stay here.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
I never do those company things either.
I think I went to one like oneof my previous workplaces.
I went to one of the socialevents.
It was at an amusement park foranyone that wanted to go, and I
think the only reason I wentwas because it was $10 per
person, like per family member,and that included their lunch.
(17:02):
So I thought for $10, that'scheaper than the ticket plus
their food.
So let's just go do that.
They can have fun at theamusement park.
And the entire day I, we walkedaround besides watching like
one of the shows where they hadlike a area for all of us to sit
in.
That was the only time that Ireally saw everyone at work,
(17:24):
other than that I would see themas I'm walking around the thing
, but it's like try not to makeeye contact with them.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
We don't, we don't need to socialize with black
people we don't, and I don'tknow why people think that
that's a great idea.
It's like I talk to you in theoffice because I have to.
Yeah, I have no talking to yououtside of these four walls.
Speaker 3 (17:45):
There was.
I would say, though that wasthe majority of the company that
I worked with.
However, the other cause I'm insales, the other sales there's
a couple of other sales guysthat I worked with had no
problems socializing with,because there was times where
we'd have to go away and acouple of us who live further
away would have to spend thenight in closer or whatever.
(18:08):
So you know we're all stayingat the same hotel.
We'd all go get dinner together, we'd all have breakfast
together, we got drinks together, so kind of.
We got used to spending a lotmore time away from our families
together, so we did have likethat.
You know, there was a group Iguess I was a lot more socially
friends, but they didn't go tothose social events at work
(18:28):
either.
You know what I mean.
It's more like we're not goingto them.
If we want to go do something,we'll go do it as ourselves, as
you would with normal friends.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
I guess yeah, and I think I've always been this way
and my older son is going to.
He's the the same way.
I'm curious as to when heactually becomes a teenager and
gets into high school and hisfriend group increases if he's
going to want to do more hangingout things.
I do know that when I got mylicense and I started dating, my
(19:02):
personality changed even moreit does and my family became
kind of dead to me once Istarted dating, like all I cared
about was dating.
Speaker 3 (19:13):
The other big one around dating and teenagers, and
I think it's something thatneeds to in a way I'm going to
talk to my son about anyway isnot pushing away friends or
whoever there is dating.
You know what I mean.
Like don't, don't forget thepeople that will always be there
(19:34):
for you, whereas that personmost likely isn't.
Let's be, I'm going to berealistic, you know what I mean.
Right, and like, how old is?
She hasn't dated, so I haven'thad to worry about that yet, but
I feel like that probably wouldbe the case there.
I watched my youngest sisterdate and the guy she said it's a
dick, no one likes him, no onelikes him in the family.
(19:54):
But at the same sense, she'slost all her friends, all her
close friends, because of that,and I don't think they're
together now.
But that's gone, thatfriendship.
If it goes for too long, youlose that friendship, you lose
that.
Then you're left with nothing,I guess.
So, yep, I think that's aconversation.
(20:15):
Definitely that I need to havechildren when they get to that
point is make sure yeah, not toabandon friends they won't
listen.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
No, they won't you listen.
I don't think I will listenbecause, dating someone, she
became my world, you know in away and I was like this will
last forever.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
They last like three weeks, you know, and it means
I'm going to be pissed off allyour friends and family exactly,
but like I still want to havethat conversation with them,
just so they're aware I guessthat's the best way to put it A
little bit self-consciouslyaware as a whole for it.
Yep, work.
Work's a new one that you'llhave to deal with too, I guess.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
Getting a part-time job Probably start earning some
money though.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
Yeah, yeah, don't expect him to repay you ever.
That doesn't happen.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
No, but if they want this thing, we'll work for it,
Okay here's one.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
It was the 12-year-old's birthday the other
day.
Something was happening.
The wife and I went out for anhour.
We just had to run out.
I think we had to go pick upsome gifts or whatever.
We always joke with the eldestabout when she's going to buy us
dinner because she's working.
Yeah, okay.
So we've gone out.
(21:32):
Wife and I were good.
We didn't go buy any food or goout for lunch without the kids.
We were pretty good there, Camehome and the elders had ordered
pizza while we were gone, thenshared it with the 12-year-old
and they ate it all before wegot back, but they had to show
(21:53):
us the photos that had happened.
Guess what we did?
We got it.
We got it.
It's like they purposely waiteduntil we were gone, so there
was no return favor of food ever.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
Yeah, that's messed up.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
It's rude.
I wanted pizza, so we went outthe next day, the wife and I,
and we went to sushi.
So fuck them.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Yeah, so my, my wife and I do that too.
Like they boys want whatever itis we bring we get.
So like we, we, we used tosneak shit, they sneak shit,
they do Right.
Like we all sneak.
Like I snuck out and got us icecream like a month or so ago.
Yeah, like right after theywent to bed I ran out to the
place and got ice cream and, youknow, kind of snuck it upstairs
(22:35):
.
My wife and I, we had to eat itin the bedroom because the boys
were still wandering around.
Speaker 3 (22:41):
We kind of hide it real quick yeah, don't worry
about it, yeah no we do that allthe time like we'll go to,
we'll go to the shops to go pickup some stuff and like kmart or
something.
And then there's like a littlesushi thing.
It's like, oh, let's just,let's just sneak a couple of
rolls of sushi and quickly sitdown and eat them down before
the kids go on all the coffees.
Or yeah, yeah, when your kidsare working, they're not,
(23:02):
they're not gonna be to you anyother way.
And think about all those timesthat you brought a takeaway and
there's no return.
I've heard that you did show up.
Oh, no, I'm sorry, I'm going tostep back.
You showed up once after workwith coffee.
I brought myself a coffee andshe brought my wife a coffee,
which was really nice, yeah,except my wife is lactose
(23:22):
intolerant and she forgot andthen got her full cream milk.
Well, the fart was there.
The fart was there, yeah, butyou know it's even work changes
their attitude a bit.
I guess is what I was gettingat there, because you know,
during the school holidays shehad a clock shift or something
coming up and she worked a fairbit, because that's probably the
(23:43):
majority of time when kids getto work is during holidays.
Because they don't.
Yeah, there's, there's ruleshere to limit how much a kid can
work during school.
You know, workplaces have torespect that.
And so she's got all theseshifts.
Then her auntie's over, soshe's like I'm gonna have time
off.
I'm like don't take time off,this is the time for you to
(24:04):
actually make money.
Like, why do you need to take,why do you need to cancel a
three hour shift?
You've got all this time.
It's not affecting you in anyway.
In her opinion, she had to worktill 10 o'clock one night, from
like seven till 10.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah,yeah.
So apparently she needed,because she works at mcdonald's,
so apparently she needed tohave this take cancel another
(24:27):
shift in preparation for fourdays time for when she was going
to do this shift, because shewas going to be tired and I'm
like, well, if you're tired,just sleep in.
Like you have four days tosleep in, like if you're tired
from sleep in.
But she was up six o'clockevery day.
It was just a, I guess.
Yeah, I mean, it had nothing todo with being tired, she just
(24:50):
didn't want to work.
It's already starting to seethat work is hard.
Oh god, it's tiring having towork and then, and then you get
that.
I guess I feel like a evil,evil villain just every time
that's kids like telling me thatit's so hard being working
about it.
Yeah, I mean I like the.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
My boys are both that way.
I'd like to tell them I startedworking on a farm when I was 10
and then when I was 15, I gotlike a regular, like department
store job, yeah.
But I remind them of that, like, yeah, I've been working since
I was 10 years old, dude,earning, earning money, you know
, working in whatever it waspaper boy, can I have 20 bucks?
No, no, you can't.
What are you gonna do?
Speaker 3 (25:29):
yeah, for the 20 bucks that's that's been me with
the children is really much.
You want money.
Okay, what are you doing toearn that money?
You go to.
You go.
You can't just have nothing'sgiven to you for nothing.
You need to work for it.
Pick it a list of things.
You come to me and go hey, I'mgoing to go do this.
If I did this, would you giveme $20?
And I'll go yeah, okay or no,or maybe in some cases I'll turn
(25:51):
around and go that's not $20.
I'll give you $30 if you dothat.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
I'm an them extra for it by all means yeah they have
this thing, they know that ifthey want to buy something kind
of expensive, they'll ask forextra chores for a while to earn
money for it.
And it's cool.
But every now and then they'relike I want to buy this thing
for $500.
I'm like no, no, I don't wantto give you $500.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
I guess that's a limit when you, when you, when
you do, you are doing the chores.
And money for chores, how, howmuch do you give them?
I guess there's a point whereyou're like I'm giving this
child a lot of money, very yeah.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
And for a half ass job.
Let's be honest, like at leastmy kids, you know once it's mad,
cause I've sort of outsourced alot of my household
responsibilities to my childrenand they do a pretty shitty job.
They're bad employees.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
I once dangled big pay in front of my children to
do some laborious work becauseat the time of 4Cover moving
into where we are now and we'reon our property I needed to go
get rid of a lot of saplings andsmall trees and cut down the
trees in the yard.
So I offered the children $50an hour to come help me.
Holy shit, yeah, so none ofthem were teenagers.
(27:13):
Then they were all littlelittle.
I'm like I'll give you guys $50an hour if you come down and
just stack stuff or move stuff,just help me out.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
Not one of my children came if you call, if
you message me, I would have goton a plane.
No, I'm kidding.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
Yeah, that's good money, like I was like trying to
.
I was trying, but that wasbefore the true the daily chores
thing, like the weekly choreslist, came into play at the
house.
But I was trying to.
Yeah, they were always askingfor things and that was me like
I'm about to do something.
You guys want to and I've beentelling them before they had to
do, like you know, to take therubbish out or whatever.
This was a way of hey, if youwant something, just ask us for
(27:51):
money.
Like ask us how to earn moneyand we'll make it.
So this is.
You know, they were alwaysasking for money but not a way
to earn it.
So one time was me like, well,hey guys, I'm giving you an
opportunity here to show you ashow you can earn.
You know, come out for twohours, basically, and you got
way more than what you wereasking for.
Or even an hour you can makewhat you want.
(28:11):
Yeah, oh, didn't happen.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
Yeah, I don't know what.
The first of all, I don't thinkI would ever offer my kids 50
bucks an hour generous that daywhat that would be that I would
need help with.
Speaker 3 (28:23):
I'd have to be desperate yeah, it was as I said
, it was we, it was.
What was it?
Like?
Four acres there that I waswalking around, that's a lot.
Yeah, there was, there was alot.
I didn't do all of it, I wasjust doing small areas where I'm
like, oh, that's more densethan others.
I'll take out a few trees andjust leave one type of thing.
Yeah, yeah, like, oh, you know,and I knew it probably wouldn't
(28:44):
have taken an hour With all thekids.
It would have taken way lesswith lots of help from me, but
it took me like four hoursbecause I had no one helping me.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
Right, yeah, right.
So I think that's the bottomline here is I shouldn't be
doing it.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
You've been listening to Dad Mode.
Exactly, you've been listeningto Dad Mode.
Our passion is navigating thiswild journey of parenthood and
modern life, from balancingfamily time to managing your
career and still squeezing insome gaming and content creation
.
And no matter what the womensay, they will never be able to
(29:28):
pry the controller out of ourcold dead hands.
Anyway, we hope you enjoyed theshow.
If you did find us on Twitter,tiktok and YouTube at
DadModePodcast and we can befound on every podcast site at
DadModePodcast.
Y'all be cool.
See you next time.
Turning off normal human male mode.
Switching to dad mode.
Welcome in to dad mode Withyour hosts Bearded, Nova and
Morph.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
I ask people what it's like when you have
teenagers.
They say think about what itwas like when you were a
teenager, but I was perfect, soI don't think there was anything
weird there.
But since you have three or twoand you have more coming like,
what kind of changes do you see?
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Attitude.
It's just attitude, but youshouldn't be seeing that by now.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Like just a snappiness is the best way to
put it you don't know whathappened, oh it's okay, we're
both really sarcastic.
Yeah, my oldest just pickedthat up.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
I think there's a level of it goes from sarcasm to
just rudeness, though you knowwhat I mean.
Like they at that age, theycross that line where they're
not being sarcastic, it's justrude Constantly.
You're like pick your attitude.
You know what I mean.
I think, like Wednesday, justgo on.
(01:11):
The wife had a great idea tohave the day off, but both of us
just put an annual leave andhad the day off.
Work.
No kids, they're all gone toschool daycare.
We went to the movies, watchedthe new Quiet Place film.
You know we went into like theluxury cinema so you get the hot
(01:33):
food as well.
So you know, I got the pizzasand like three different types
of popcorn and fucking, you knowwe're loaded up with food.
But where the cinema was?
We'd never been to that onebefore, but it's attached to
they call it D dfo here, whichis like a direct factory outlet.
So it's like a.
It's like a, a mall full ofretailers and it's where they
(01:56):
send all their older stock.
But like the stuff like you'renot going, unites that are no
longer but they've still gotsurplus of it goes there.
It's discounted.
Yeah, we actually have it too.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So that's where the cinema is.
It's in the middle of this.
So afterwards we decided to gowalk around and have a look at
everything and while we werethere we were in the Nike store
(02:20):
and I got some new Jordans,actually like three pairs for
like $100, which is cheap, asbecause I don't buy myself
anything normally Like I'mpretty happy not to buy it.
But I was wearing my Air Maxesand I forgot how comfortable of
a shoe they are and I've hadthem for like four years.
I mainly wear work boots.
You're probably the same.
(02:41):
You've got shoes that youhardly ever wear, yep, but they
last forever.
So there's no point of buying anew pair of shoes because you
still got the one from years ago.
And so I've gone around there.
These shoes are reallycomfortable.
I remember that saw some jordans.
The wife's like you should geta pair, and I'm like okay, and
then I'm looking at them like Idon't know what one I want to
own because obviously they'regoing to last me probably until
(03:04):
I retire.
Now at the rate I go throughshoes, ended up buying all three
.
But while we were there, youknow, I saw some pants and she's
like, oh, we should get thekids some pants, like some like
workout pants, but you know thecomfortable pants you can wear
around everywhere.
So she goes we'll just getthese tights for the girls.
So I said, okay, so we've gotthat home.
12-year-old happy this is great.
(03:24):
Love them, puts them on,feeling good.
16-year-old.
It was like attitude towards it,and that's what I mean by the
teenage attitude.
It's like you know, I said tomy wife later I'm like well, why
react like that?
You got something for nothing.
There was no reason for us to.
It wasn't you needed them, itwas purely a nice thing.
(03:47):
Going, hey, we'll just buythese, yeah for you.
Yeah, there you go, surprise,and then you get attitude for
stuff like that.
That's the teenage.
You don't know what you've done, what brought it on.
It just yep, something likethat happens and that's what
you're going to put up with.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
Yeah yeah, I mean like right now, like I pick him
up from camp or when I get himfrom school.
Yeah, he walks in the house,immediately goes to his room.
I do not see him again unlessthere's dinner.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
Yeah, that's normal.
I just expect that for yearsnow.
That's just the standard.
Yeah, I mean like yeah, yeah,yeah, unless they want to come
out and annoy like a sibling ordo something.
They're like just you know.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
I think I find it frustrating because, like now
that he's older and I can havelike a real conversation with
him about stuff, now he doesn'twant to hang around.
You know what I mean.
So it's like but you just gotgood.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Yeah, I know you gotinteresting.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
You do good stuff.
I was just saying, yeah, my son, you know getting into
basketball and things like that.
I'm like, oh cool, we can godown to the basketball court now
and play ball.
Yeah, like that's not cool.
I even brought a hoop and setit up in the backyard, made sure
it was regulation height.
I was like you know, let's justkeep you practicing your
shooting.
I'm not going to sit you on acourt that's not high enough,
(05:05):
because we want to set it to thesame height as you're playing.
So you've got that musclememory, etc.
Yeah, it doesn't get used.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
No, no, we did the same thing.
We set up a basketball hoopbecause I had one growing up.
I use it all the time.
So we moved to this house.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
We got one, set it up up.
They use it a bunch the firstsummer and then, like the last
three summers, barely barelypossible.
It's growing up.
I'm going to bring up a storyof mine.
All my friends had a lot ofdifferent basketball hoops set
up in their yards growing up.
It was cool going over there tofriends and doing that.
I really wanted one.
Yeah, this is we're talkingabout primary schools, you know
early, early school.
So I really wanted one.
Parents brought me this reallycool Charlotte Hornets it wasn't
(05:48):
even a team that I wasfollowing back then, but it was
the 90s, you know and they gotme a Hornets board.
It looked really cool.
That thing got hung up finallyto use when my son was three
years old.
My parents carried this thingaround for like 20 years in the
shed.
I was waiting for the day forit to go up.
(06:09):
It never went up anywhere untilmy son was like three and then
they hung it up about I don'tknow a few feet off the ground
it wasn't that much and then Ithink someone ran around the
corner and hit the side andbroke it, so like it didn't last
long.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
It basically lasted long enough to deteriorate on
the time did you ask like whydidn't you hang this up when I
was a kid?
Speaker 3 (06:31):
I did just yeah, we'll get to.
It just never happened.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
I just gave up on the idea you know, what's funny is
like my mom treats my, my kids,so much better than I treated
growing up, like she's alwaysaround and like she and she
built a play scape thing forthem and they're always getting
donuts and ice cream and crap.
Where did this person come from?
Speaker 3 (06:55):
Because I don't care.
I tell my wife all the time Ican't wait to be a grandparent
more than I can be a parent,because I know the rules are out
.
There's no rules when you're agrandparent.
That's when it's time to like,just be a totally different
person.
It's like a new level to fuckwith your kids in the head.
Really, you know what I mean.
You're just, you're fun.
(07:16):
All of a sudden You're like youknow, let's have a soft.
You go into bed, drink somesoft drink, soft drink.
Going around everywhere there'sfucking bags of lollies.
You don't care, let's watch thewhole series.
Exactly, not allowed out atnight.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
We're going to the city my wife keeps saying when
the boys have kids, I don't wantto do that, but now, if I can
fuck with them a little bit more, I'll do that.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
it's a new level.
You get to be this person thatthey just look at and it
frustrates them.
You know what I mean.
Like I watch my parents, youwatch it with your mom, I watch
it with my mom.
It frustrates you a little bit.
It's like why do you get toundo everything that we do as
parents, right, and care yeah.
And don't care.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I remember specifically, I was like Mom,
please don't do this thing, youknow, with the boys or whatever.
And of course she's likewhatever, and then she'll do it
anyway.
Yeah, yeah so.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
I remember I picked up two of the girls Wednesday
with my mom and for a couple ofdays, and then I got there and
you know they were talking aboutthings.
I'm like, oh, what did you have?
You know, we had nuggets andchips.
This night we had that and I wehad ice cream for breakfast.
Blah, blah, blah.
And I'm like, oh cool, did youhave any fruit?
Did you, did you eat any fruit?
And one of the children lookedme dead in the eye and said I
(08:42):
drank cordial which is, I guess,like Kool-Aid, basically,
basically, because it was afruit flavored drink.
That's acceptable level offruit intake for my children,
apparently, while they werethere.
Yeah, they'll go to, they'll goto like a dessert.
There's a couple of restaurantsover here that only just do
desserts type of thing.
Yeah, and they'll go out andhave lunch or dinner would just
(09:03):
be a dessert bar, you know,that's, that's the stuff my mom.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
I'm not going to lie.
I kind of want to hang out withyour parents.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
Yeah, she's just.
Let's let them do what shewants.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Wow.
Well, yeah, and I think we'vetalked before how I also can't
wait until the boys like, gettheir own apartment.
I can't wait.
And people might be thinking,oh, you want them to move out.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
No, Because I never going to move out of home, like
I always thought the oldest is.
Just she's just going to be theone that's here forever, type
of thing.
She just never leave the nestand I always assumed 12 year old
(09:48):
would do that as well.
If she'd leave, she'd be prettyquickly to get out.
But we're going through a stagethat I like to call grandma
hands.
That she has, where she has thestrength and grip and posture of
like a 90-year-old, so shecan't actually do anything with
her hands.
It's like if you're asking herto wipe, it's like this real
(10:11):
like no pressure on the clothbut the hand is just barely
touching it.
She can't open jars, she can'topen anything.
Like she's just got these hands.
She's just frail and weak and Irealized the other night that
she's probably not moving outeither, unless she has a carer
attached to her, because shecouldn't get ice cream out of
the tub.
Like you have to wait for herolder sister to do it, because
(10:33):
it was just the spoon and theice cream was too much for her
hands.
It's 12.
Yeah, it's just like that.
But you just see, you can seeit in the grip that there's just
no force or anything behindanything that she's doing.
It's like you can.
I don't know if she feels likeshe's the Incredible Hulk or
something where she's unaware ofher full potential and it feels
(10:54):
like she'll crush everythingunless she withholds her own
power, right.
But, that's not the case.
It's really not the case.
I keep telling her don't worry,I don't think you're going to
break anything.
Yeah, but she's not moving outeither.
Now I'm stuck with two kidsapparently so my oldest.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
He turns 13 in October.
He is two inches shorter.
I'm 5'10".
He's two inches shorter than meand he's now moved up to men's
medium for clothes.
He's a big kid, so he hasn'treally hit his growth spurt yet.
He's going to be way tallerthan me and every now and then
he likes picking up his brother,who's like 65 pounds, and I'm
(11:33):
like, hey, can you go get a bagof pellets from the shed?
It's like 40 pounds.
I don't think I can lift it.
Yes, you can.
He'll pull the ice cream thing.
I can't scoop it out.
Dad, I'm like you're as big asme.
Yes, you can, you can.
I'm still holding a rank in myhouse for hot.
Are you still playing?
I am for now, obviously, but itwon't be long.
(11:56):
I'm thinking by the end of nextyear.
Easily he'll be past me, butI'm not worried at all.
He'll make his little jokes butat the end of the day he
realizes I could kick him out.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
I think the sun's probably going to get me.
I feel like he'll pit me onsome 5'11".
He's probably going to pit me.
I don't know where he'sstanding in height, but every
time I see him he looks likehe's, you know, taller and
taller.
The eldest.
I feel like she may have justhit her last growth spurt,
because girls, they have theirgrowth spurt earlier than men.
(12:29):
Yeah, so they kind of finishthat mid-high schools.
You know where they stop really.
So I feel like she's maybepopped hers.
The other two girls maybe onemight be tall.
I feel like one's going to betall, the other one won't be.
And then little Dakota we foundout the other day because we had
to go get her 12-month needlesand they do like you check your
(12:54):
weight and your height to makesure the progression's going
right.
She's like a five percentile inheight and weight, so she's
tiny.
I really don't think that'sgoing to change.
I think she's just going tostay short forever.
I don't even think she's goingto get taller than her mom and
that's, that's saying something.
(13:14):
But that's probably a goodthing for my wife.
I tell her that I'm like, heylook, you might have one child
that's not tall.
Then, yeah, she thinks that's abad thing.
I'm trying to put a spin it ina good way yeah, so my boys
couldn't be more different.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
So my oldest is he's like in the 90th percentile for
height.
Yeah, my youngest is in likethe 10th or 15th yeah, I mean
and he's, he's turning 11, sohe's just gonna be a little dude
.
Yeah, he's a little dude likewe keep.
We tell, hey, you know, don'tworry, you'll hit your bro spurt
, and I'm like, yeah, you'll belike five, five, five, six maybe
(13:47):
.
Yeah, because I don't think thepercentiles really change all
that much.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
No, once you kind of stick to a path.
Then the percentiles, I believeit turned out.
I didn't realize, but it's aworldwide thing.
So our growth chart's the sameas your growth chart, et cetera.
It's a World HealthOrganization.
Most people I personallythought that every country would
have different growth charts toa degree.
(14:13):
You know what I mean.
Yeah, obviously they're justlooking at it as a worldwide
thing instead of as a nationthing.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
So yeah, um.
Speaker 3 (14:21):
So you're saying, going back to teenagers growing
up, changes, introvert orextrovert children.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Oh, my oldest is an introvert.
I think my youngest is more ofan extrovert because he loves
talking to people.
He hates being by himself.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
Okay.
Okay, because I was going to saythat I think that changes we
talked about us being teenagersand just never being home, being
ghosts, you know disappeared inthe world of our parents' eyes.
And both my two daughters hereat home the older two they're
both very introvert, like wejust had vacation, two weeks
school vacation, because that'show our school system works and
(15:00):
I think we saw no, I'm prettyconfident, neither girl actually
saw either none of theirfriends for the entire two weeks
.
They may have talked to them onthe phone, but that's kind of
like their happy places to livein the cave, the smelly cave
that they live in their room andjust message, text message, if
that's as much of a social lifeas that they need, whereas my
(15:23):
13-year-old son he's as much ashe's a gamer and likes doing
things he likes still gamingwith a mate at either their
house or they're coming over.
So he's still got that.
Yeah, I personally feel like itdoes have a little bit to do
with their attitude.
You know how much socialinteraction, as much as they can
, you know, introvert or not, Istill feel like kids still need
(15:45):
that social interaction or elsethey get grumpy, I guess is the
best way to put it and, as Isaid, my two stay at home
majority of the time, but themoment they spend a bit of time
with friends or go do that,they've got a slight attitude
change, for a couple of days atleast.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Yeah, I'm not a fan of big social things Like I, my,
my company had a picnic todayand you know I have to like work
myself up to get to go to itand interact with people for two
hours it's it's.
I remember walking up and I'mabout to open, or walk around
the corner where everybody is,and she said I took this deep
breath in All right, here we go.
(16:21):
You know, oh God, I hate it.
And then I stood in the samegeneral spot for the whole two
hours, or two and a half hours.
I was there because I knew if Iwalked anywhere else I'd have
to talk to more people.
So I know they're like you wantto go get something to eat?
I'm like no, because then Ihave to talk to all the people
that are over there.
So I'm going to stay here.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
I never do those company things either.
I think I went to one like oneof my previous workplaces.
I went to one of the socialevents.
It was at an amusement park foranyone that wanted to go, and I
think the only reason I wentwas because it was $10 per
person, like per family member,and that included their lunch.
(17:02):
So I thought for $10, that'scheaper than the ticket plus
their food.
So let's just go do that.
They can have fun at theamusement park.
And the entire day I, we walkedaround besides watching like
one of the shows where they hadlike a area for all of us to sit
in.
That was the only time that Ireally saw everyone at work,
(17:24):
other than that I would see themas I'm walking around the thing
, but it's like try not to makeeye contact with them.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
We don't, we don't need to socialize with black
people we don't, and I don'tknow why people think that
that's a great idea.
It's like I talk to you in theoffice because I have to.
Yeah, I have no talking to yououtside of these four walls.
Speaker 3 (17:45):
There was.
I would say, though that wasthe majority of the company that
I worked with.
However, the other cause I'm insales, the other sales there's
a couple of other sales guysthat I worked with had no
problems socializing with,because there was times where
we'd have to go away and acouple of us who live further
away would have to spend thenight in closer or whatever.
(18:08):
So you know we're all stayingat the same hotel.
We'd all go get dinner together, we'd all have breakfast
together, we got drinks together, so kind of.
We got used to spending a lotmore time away from our families
together, so we did have likethat.
You know, there was a group Iguess I was a lot more socially
friends, but they didn't go tothose social events at work
(18:28):
either.
You know what I mean.
It's more like we're not goingto them.
If we want to go do something,we'll go do it as ourselves, as
you would with normal friends.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
I guess yeah, and I think I've always been this way
and my older son is going to.
He's the the same way.
I'm curious as to when heactually becomes a teenager and
gets into high school and hisfriend group increases if he's
going to want to do more hangingout things.
I do know that when I got mylicense and I started dating, my
(19:02):
personality changed even moreit does and my family became
kind of dead to me once Istarted dating, like all I cared
about was dating.
Speaker 3 (19:13):
The other big one around dating and teenagers, and
I think it's something thatneeds to in a way I'm going to
talk to my son about anyway isnot pushing away friends or
whoever there is dating.
You know what I mean.
Like don't, don't forget thepeople that will always be there
(19:34):
for you, whereas that personmost likely isn't.
Let's be, I'm going to berealistic, you know what I mean.
Right, and like, how old is?
She hasn't dated, so I haven'thad to worry about that yet, but
I feel like that probably wouldbe the case there.
I watched my youngest sisterdate and the guy she said it's a
dick, no one likes him, no onelikes him in the family.
(19:54):
But at the same sense, she'slost all her friends, all her
close friends, because of that,and I don't think they're
together now.
But that's gone, thatfriendship.
If it goes for too long, youlose that friendship, you lose
that.
Then you're left with nothing,I guess.
So, yep, I think that's aconversation.
(20:15):
Definitely that I need to havechildren when they get to that
point is make sure yeah, not toabandon friends they won't
listen.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
No, they won't you listen.
I don't think I will listenbecause, dating someone, she
became my world, you know in away and I was like this will
last forever.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
They last like three weeks, you know, and it means
I'm going to be pissed off allyour friends and family exactly,
but like I still want to havethat conversation with them,
just so they're aware I guessthat's the best way to put it A
little bit self-consciouslyaware as a whole for it.
Yep, work.
Work's a new one that you'llhave to deal with too, I guess.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
Getting a part-time job Probably start earning some
money though.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
Yeah, yeah, don't expect him to repay you ever.
That doesn't happen.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
No, but if they want this thing, we'll work for it,
Okay here's one.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
It was the 12-year-old's birthday the other
day.
Something was happening.
The wife and I went out for anhour.
We just had to run out.
I think we had to go pick upsome gifts or whatever.
We always joke with the eldestabout when she's going to buy us
dinner because she's working.
Yeah, okay.
So we've gone out.
(21:32):
Wife and I were good.
We didn't go buy any food or goout for lunch without the kids.
We were pretty good there, Camehome and the elders had ordered
pizza while we were gone, thenshared it with the 12-year-old
and they ate it all before wegot back, but they had to show
(21:53):
us the photos that had happened.
Guess what we did?
We got it.
We got it.
It's like they purposely waiteduntil we were gone, so there
was no return favor of food ever.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
Yeah, that's messed up.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
It's rude.
I wanted pizza, so we went outthe next day, the wife and I,
and we went to sushi.
So fuck them.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Yeah, so my, my wife and I do that too.
Like they boys want whatever itis we bring we get.
So like we, we, we used tosneak shit, they sneak shit,
they do Right.
Like we all sneak.
Like I snuck out and got us icecream like a month or so ago.
Yeah, like right after theywent to bed I ran out to the
place and got ice cream and, youknow, kind of snuck it upstairs
(22:35):
.
My wife and I, we had to eat itin the bedroom because the boys
were still wandering around.
Speaker 3 (22:41):
We kind of hide it real quick yeah, don't worry
about it, yeah no we do that allthe time like we'll go to,
we'll go to the shops to go pickup some stuff and like kmart or
something.
And then there's like a littlesushi thing.
It's like, oh, let's just,let's just sneak a couple of
rolls of sushi and quickly sitdown and eat them down before
the kids go on all the coffees.
Or yeah, yeah, when your kidsare working, they're not,
(23:02):
they're not gonna be to you anyother way.
And think about all those timesthat you brought a takeaway and
there's no return.
I've heard that you did show up.
Oh, no, I'm sorry, I'm going tostep back.
You showed up once after workwith coffee.
I brought myself a coffee andshe brought my wife a coffee,
which was really nice, yeah,except my wife is lactose
(23:22):
intolerant and she forgot andthen got her full cream milk.
Well, the fart was there.
The fart was there, yeah, butyou know it's even work changes
their attitude a bit.
I guess is what I was gettingat there, because you know,
during the school holidays shehad a clock shift or something
coming up and she worked a fairbit, because that's probably the
(23:43):
majority of time when kids getto work is during holidays.
Because they don't.
Yeah, there's, there's ruleshere to limit how much a kid can
work during school.
You know, workplaces have torespect that.
And so she's got all theseshifts.
Then her auntie's over, soshe's like I'm gonna have time
off.
I'm like don't take time off,this is the time for you to
(24:04):
actually make money.
Like, why do you need to take,why do you need to cancel a
three hour shift?
You've got all this time.
It's not affecting you in anyway.
In her opinion, she had to worktill 10 o'clock one night, from
like seven till 10.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah,yeah.
So apparently she needed,because she works at mcdonald's,
so apparently she needed tohave this take cancel another
(24:27):
shift in preparation for fourdays time for when she was going
to do this shift, because shewas going to be tired and I'm
like, well, if you're tired,just sleep in.
Like you have four days tosleep in, like if you're tired
from sleep in.
But she was up six o'clockevery day.
It was just a, I guess.
Yeah, I mean, it had nothing todo with being tired, she just
(24:50):
didn't want to work.
It's already starting to seethat work is hard.
Oh god, it's tiring having towork and then, and then you get
that.
I guess I feel like a evil,evil villain just every time
that's kids like telling me thatit's so hard being working
about it.
Yeah, I mean I like the.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
My boys are both that way.
I'd like to tell them I startedworking on a farm when I was 10
and then when I was 15, I gotlike a regular, like department
store job, yeah.
But I remind them of that, like, yeah, I've been working since
I was 10 years old, dude,earning, earning money, you know
, working in whatever it waspaper boy, can I have 20 bucks?
No, no, you can't.
What are you gonna do?
Speaker 3 (25:29):
yeah, for the 20 bucks that's that's been me with
the children is really much.
You want money.
Okay, what are you doing toearn that money?
You go to.
You go.
You can't just have nothing'sgiven to you for nothing.
You need to work for it.
Pick it a list of things.
You come to me and go hey, I'mgoing to go do this.
If I did this, would you giveme $20?
And I'll go yeah, okay or no,or maybe in some cases I'll turn
(25:51):
around and go that's not $20.
I'll give you $30 if you dothat.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
I'm an them extra for it by all means yeah they have
this thing, they know that ifthey want to buy something kind
of expensive, they'll ask forextra chores for a while to earn
money for it.
And it's cool.
But every now and then they'relike I want to buy this thing
for $500.
I'm like no, no, I don't wantto give you $500.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
I guess that's a limit when you, when you, when
you do, you are doing the chores.
And money for chores, how, howmuch do you give them?
I guess there's a point whereyou're like I'm giving this
child a lot of money, very yeah.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
And for a half ass job.
Let's be honest, like at leastmy kids, you know once it's mad,
cause I've sort of outsourced alot of my household
responsibilities to my childrenand they do a pretty shitty job.
They're bad employees.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
I once dangled big pay in front of my children to
do some laborious work becauseat the time of 4Cover moving
into where we are now and we'reon our property I needed to go
get rid of a lot of saplings andsmall trees and cut down the
trees in the yard.
So I offered the children $50an hour to come help me.
Holy shit, yeah, so none ofthem were teenagers.
(27:13):
Then they were all littlelittle.
I'm like I'll give you guys $50an hour if you come down and
just stack stuff or move stuff,just help me out.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
Not one of my children came if you call, if
you message me, I would have goton a plane.
No, I'm kidding.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
Yeah, that's good money, like I was like trying to
.
I was trying, but that wasbefore the true the daily chores
thing, like the weekly choreslist, came into play at the
house.
But I was trying to.
Yeah, they were always askingfor things and that was me like
I'm about to do something.
You guys want to and I've beentelling them before they had to
do, like you know, to take therubbish out or whatever.
This was a way of hey, if youwant something, just ask us for
(27:51):
money.
Like ask us how to earn moneyand we'll make it.
So this is.
You know, they were alwaysasking for money but not a way
to earn it.
So one time was me like, well,hey guys, I'm giving you an
opportunity here to show you ashow you can earn.
You know, come out for twohours, basically, and you got
way more than what you wereasking for.
Or even an hour you can makewhat you want.
(28:11):
Yeah, oh, didn't happen.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
Yeah, I don't know what.
The first of all, I don't thinkI would ever offer my kids 50
bucks an hour generous that daywhat that would be that I would
need help with.
Speaker 3 (28:23):
I'd have to be desperate yeah, it was as I said
, it was we, it was.
What was it?
Like?
Four acres there that I waswalking around, that's a lot.
Yeah, there was, there was alot.
I didn't do all of it, I wasjust doing small areas where I'm
like, oh, that's more densethan others.
I'll take out a few trees andjust leave one type of thing.
Yeah, yeah, like, oh, you know,and I knew it probably wouldn't
(28:44):
have taken an hour With all thekids.
It would have taken way lesswith lots of help from me, but
it took me like four hoursbecause I had no one helping me.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
Right, yeah, right.
So I think that's the bottomline here is I shouldn't be
doing it.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
You've been listening to Dad Mode.
Exactly, you've been listeningto Dad Mode.
Our passion is navigating thiswild journey of parenthood and
modern life, from balancingfamily time to managing your
career and still squeezing insome gaming and content creation
.
And no matter what the womensay, they will never be able to
(29:28):
pry the controller out of ourcold dead hands.
Anyway, we hope you enjoyed theshow.
If you did find us on Twitter,tiktok and YouTube at
DadModePodcast and we can befound on every podcast site at
DadModePodcast.
Y'all be cool.
See you next time.
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