October 2, 2024 • 61 mins
What if the very things you think you can't control are exactly where your power lies? On this episode of Medicated Minutes, we challenge you to rethink the inevitability of life's events and the importance of personal responsibility, all wrapped in Emerson Dameron's signature humor and wit. We kick off with a passionate monologue that tackles these existential themes head-on, urging you to embrace life's chaos rather than resist it. From the ironies of trying to stop the unstoppable to finding freedom in the mundane, we present a philosophy that turns conventional wisdom on its head.
Can you love yourself without succumbing to the trap of fame? We then pivot to a deep-dive into the paradoxical dance between self-love and sadism, exploring how public attention can wreak havoc on mental health. By drawing parallels with historical figures and examining consensual sadistic practices, we illustrate the necessity of rigorous self-discipline and mutual respect for personal growth. This segment is a hard-hitting look at how embracing one's flaws and leveraging past pain can pave the way for true healing and transformation.
Finally, we explore the transformative power of shedding one's ego and embracing observational awareness. Through the poignant story of Scarlet Obscura, a Nova Scotian artist seeking meaning in Los Angeles, we emphasize the importance of creativity and curiosity in understanding both ourselves and others. This narrative serves as a testament to the power of art and self-expression amidst life's unpredictability. Tune in to discover how you can harness creativity, humor, and empathy to navigate the chaos of existence and find deeper meaning in everyday life.
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Emerson Dameron's Sophistication Nation - April 4th - All major music-delivery platforms
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
About to hit you with the last knock-knock.
Emerson Dameron can't ever fly.
Medicaid medicine city fun time.
Harmony for slice, like a son'schild.
Tune in and let's ride.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
This is here to go, mine.
We're ignited.
We turn the mundane to delight.
We're on topics.
We ain't fighting.
We got you rolling on the floor.
Can't stop.
From the punchline to the mic,drop LA's number one.
I've on card punched it all.
Development program, home offans, mercedes and vice-size.
(00:40):
Eat by the frill is Gage FromLos Angeles.
Let me be sage Lies.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
The time has come to pass.
Oh, this is happening.
This is very much happening.
This, in fact, is happeningmore than anything has happened
for a long time around here.
It's happening and I'msurprised that you are not
prepared, or at least accepting.
You had ample time.
There were many dress rehearsalsin which you participated.
(01:27):
You didn't think it was gonnahappen.
What do you think this is?
You had all the sameinformation everyone else did
and yet came to wildly differentconclusions which put you way
out on the crank fringe and youare drummed out of scholarship
on this topic because you arewrong.
(01:49):
You knew that it was going tohappen, but here's how you
defeated yourself.
I'm going to tell you exactlyhow you kicked your own ass and
made yourself lose when I gaveyou a perfectly good shot to win
because I love you and we gotit like that and I don't even
care.
I'm over that.
(02:09):
Now I don't have to win.
To win or have fun.
To have fun, you can imaginewhere it goes from there, or
maybe not.
Maybe you're dumber than Ithought if you thought that
there was anything you could doto stop this from happening.
I know you don't want it tohappen.
That sways me in the directionof doing it.
The fact that it bothers you isin the plus column of reasons
(02:34):
to do it.
If you pretended to like it, Iprobably wouldn't be convinced,
because you're not good at lying.
Astounding considering thefrequency in which you do it.
The only person you are foolingis yourself and you believed by
telling me not to do it Noteven asking.
It wasn't even worth it to bepolite to try to get what you
(02:59):
maybe thought or wanted tobelieve that you want, which was
your freedom, which youabsolutely cannot handle
Self-respect.
You wouldn't know what to dowith it if you had it.
You don't want it.
It's going to make you sick,poison, or the medicine is in
the depths, and we both knowthat you're lightweight.
(03:19):
That's not a good or a badthing, but it was your
responsibility to factor it in.
Surely by now you know your ownweaknesses.
It baffles me and I find ithilarious.
You thought that I wasn't goingto do this because you didn't
want me to do it, or you thoughtthere was some move you were
going to pull off at the lastminute that was going to stop it
(03:41):
from happening.
You missed the bus.
If you even were at the busstop, you really don't know
where the bus is.
You're too arrogant to ride thebus, so you're going to destroy
the environment and breakyourself financially by buying a
luxury car that you can'tafford.
You are at liberty to do that.
(04:04):
I'm gonna bust on you about itbecause I care.
I didn't care.
I would just watch youhumiliate yourself.
I would enjoy that, but there'sa lot of other forms of that
content out there for me toconsume.
I've got more suffering in myto-watch-later queue that I can
(04:24):
really handle.
So much like sex.
I'm turning it down Veryselective.
My standards may be too high.
I'm totally okay with that.
I'm gonna wait for someonespecial or something, some idea
somewhere, some why you reallythought this wasn't going to
(04:45):
happen because you didn't wantit to and that was it.
You weren't even going to do it.
You want this to happen becauseyou're sick and it's delicious
and delightful and I love you.
This is Emerson Dameron'sMedicated Minutes, LA's number
one avant-garde personaldevelopment program.
I'm Emerson, I do it all, so noone except me can stop it from
(05:07):
happening.
I produce it, I write it, Iperform it Pretty much
everything with the 1630 AMkchungradioorg
medicated-minutescom.
Here we go.
(05:28):
It's already almost over.
Take a beat, breathe into theexperience of being here and ask
yourself what am I so afraid of?
Maybe you're afraid of missingsome essential life experience.
(05:52):
You're afraid you already have,or that it doesn't matter
because nothing does.
Maybe it's nothing, maybeyou're just a regular nerves
McGee.
Or maybe you're afraid of yourown glorious cataclysmic power,
the riotous multitudes youcontain.
You are smart enough to knowhow nearly infinitely ignorant
(06:13):
you are, but you're not toosmart to be hot, and you may
already be a satanic Buddhist.
Nothing is good or bad inisolation, only in context.
The Buddha and the Beastmasterare a good team.
This, right here, is all youget.
Life is for living up downacross, diagonally, sideways,
(06:34):
because nothing matters.
You may already be a SatanicBuddhist.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
I'm sorry.
In this baroque dream, everytouch is pure.
Oh satanic Buddha, make ourpassions endure.
Submit to the fire your torment.
We find bliss.
(07:25):
With a desperate plea, wesurrender to your kiss.
Thank you From the shadows rise.
(08:23):
Hear the ancient call In thetemple, where dark and light
entwine With desire burning, ahymn to thee we sing.
Where souls revolve With afervent pulse, our voices will
(08:58):
ignite, oh Satanic Buddha.
Guide through the endless nightIn silken murmurs.
(09:22):
We gather in delight as themoon dances with stars in
twilight.
Our hearts aflame an oath toyou.
We bring, o satanic Buddha,where our desires cling, divine
(09:44):
and decadent.
Our voices ascend Under neonfrom it's so surreal, with
everyone's.
Our laughter seals the deal Ina flight of fancy psychedelic
trance.
Oh, cosmic Buddha, join in ourdance With a swagger in our step
(10:12):
.
We conquer the night in akaleidoscope world.
Nothing feels quite right In acosmic cabaret, in a cosmic
cabaret With velvet shadows andglitter in the view.
We tip our hats to a laughingBuddha's grin.
In this world, dance wherecolours lead the way, with never
(10:55):
not be celebrating that youdon't exist.
Choose what you believe and bespecific what you wish.
Indulge your sacred passions,don't complain when you can quit
, never take it personal anddon't take any With equanimity,
(11:23):
with lust, in polarity.
We trust you are everything youlove and hate and knew it was
Satanic Buddha's helping you getthrough it.
Through which cause, oh Buddha,oh Beastmaster Ascended.
(11:54):
Aesthetics were the gloriousdisaster.
Oh Buddha, oh Beastmaster.
A synesthetic world and gloryand disaster.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
I'm not going to let you go, thank you, thanks for
(13:35):
watching.
I only know that I know nothing,said Socrates, one of the
(13:59):
notoriously wisest people whoever lived, to his eventual
detriment in that, like almosteveryone at the time, he had an
excruciating, senseless death.
At this point he would still bealive, but who knows what he
would be up to?
Probably nothing good.
(14:19):
How that translates in my lovelanguage that we use in this
house is that one must possess acertain acuity to really commit
to the ultimate bit, which isthe adoption of a beginner's
mind, as the great DT Suzukicalled it, to approach with a
(14:41):
willingness to override yourassumptions, which is
intellectual honesty, whichrequires some emotional honesty,
because your emotions willraise a ruckus when you start to
actually embrace dangerousideas and ask obvious and
painful questions about what isgoing on, as you have.
(15:03):
And you know that there's morethan this.
You know that the world is notjust brutally transactional.
You've seen butterflies at play, which is all that it takes to
know that life is about pleasureto the extent that it is a
bloody struggle and a slog thatis only in service to play,
never the other way around.
(15:24):
Pleasure and play the embraceof anger and fear and suffering
and risk.
That's not what life is about,because life is not about
anything.
But if it were, it would allfall roughly under that rubric.
You are ready to unlearn whatyou know?
Disclose what is within you,because if you bring forth what
(15:46):
is within you, what is withinyou will save you and perhaps a
couple of other people who knowyou well.
If you don't bring forth whatis within you, what is within
you will destroy you.
Hopefully you're not in thesubway, because it would affect
other people the way that yourlies affect those around you.
I can only speak for myself, butyou know, you know.
(16:09):
If you know, you know, youdefinitely know, and it's time
to wake up.
This is your call to adventure.
You see the chaos.
You see the darkness.
You see how the light would notexist without the darkness.
You get it.
So reach out and get it, gripit, grab it, have it.
(16:30):
Don't be shocked when you slipheadlong into nihilism.
If you're lucky, it's easier toget out of than narcissism, not
as damaging.
Because what are you going todo?
There's nothing to do.
There's no reason to doanything.
The fact that meaning is notfixed makes you feel that it
(16:53):
does not exist, because you arenot used to looking for it in
its unconventional, nebulous,fractal form that I am smart
enough to know that I can'ttotally explain, and the fact
that there's stuff that neitherone of us can adequately explain
is enough reason to keepexploring, which you do
(17:14):
Eventually you accept the call.
Generally, it happens one of twoways.
You get on Mr Toad's wild rideand smoke 5-MeO-DMT and you free
yourself from yourself for a15-minute slice of time.
That is the longest 15 minutesof your life and everyone else's
(17:36):
, or at least your ancestors,all of whom will be in you when
you come home, or rather, youwill recognize that they were
there all the time and they haveseen everything that you've
done, that you've got nothing tohide, what you feared has come
to pass.
That might convince you.
You might be fortunate enoughto find yourself in the
(17:57):
circumstances where it happens.
Otherwise, it could be a songoverheard in the pharmacy, or it
could be some sort of talismanthat you get in the mail that
was supposed to go to yourneighbor and you were going to
give it to them, even though youdon't really know them.
Well, yeah, you know who theyare and they were kind of
(18:18):
unpleasant when you encounteredthem on the stairs when they
were coming up with groceriesand you were coming down and you
had the music on and it waslike that by Future and Metro
Boomin featuring Kendrick Lamar,and you were kind of in your
own end zone and you didn't seethem.
And now maybe they think you'rea dick, which seems kind of
judgy.
(18:38):
You're going to give it backanyway.
You didn't intend to open theirmail.
That's not the kind of thingyou would have done, except
carelessly.
But then a song came on yourDiscover Weekly with lyrics that
specifically instructed you tokeep this thing as a talisman
for the good of not justyourself and your neighbor, but
(18:59):
the entire scope of humanity,the sweep of its history and
future, and infinity andnothingness.
You, me, them, everybody, allof them are now at your throat
Because by crossing thethreshold, by becoming a true
sucker for love, you've joinedthe creative class.
(19:20):
You have immediately ascendedits hierarchy because you know
that it's meaningless, whichmakes it easy to game as a fun
diversion on your fool's journeyinto genius.
Now you've got all kinds ofhaters coming at you,
challengers, people who thinkthis is a zero-sum game, when
you've been begging them to justopen their eyes and other
(19:41):
orifices and mouths and sensegates to this and understand it.
Maybe they can't, they certainlywon't.
That doesn't really phase you.
You're not even really thinkingabout what you're doing anymore
because you've overcome yourfear and ego and you're free to
explore and let the criticsdecide, and historians, teachers
of the classes that will betaught on you and your approach
(20:05):
to life as a work of art, how itbrought you to sing the absurd
and hear it reverberate off thewalls of the innermost cave.
And get the cosmic joke andunderstand that it's on you and
look into the abyss and see howabyssy it is and understand that
human consciousness on you.
And look into the abyss and seehow abyssy it is and understand
that human consciousness itselfis hell.
(20:25):
It's nature's perfect torturedevice and you're willing to get
zoned by the cosmic joke, toget roasted and like a phoenix
reborn, having transcended andincluded your ordeal, as your
wounds turn to scabs and thoseturn to scars that are bitchin'.
You have embraced the chaos andyou're brand at home but in a
(20:50):
palatable, if not highlyinfectious, certainly catchy
form, and everybody's dancing toit and all the quotidian BS
continues apace.
But nothing can get to you.
You are free, you are loved andyou are absolutely worshipped
by fans who love you.
Be careful Anyone who puts youon a pedestal is going to treat
(21:13):
you like crap when you fall.
You know this well by nowthrough experience.
Still, there are certain fringebenefits to having fans.
I don't want fame.
If I ever get seriouslyactually famous, I hope that
you'll cancel me immediately.
I think I've given you plentyof ammunition for that.
I'm not kidding.
(21:34):
Fame is unconditionallyterrible.
Nothing is really unconditionalIf you can enjoy it.
You are Willie Nelson.
You are the American Buddha.
You are one of the elect.
It drives most people insane.
Those who thrive will save usall.
We wouldn't have had Malcolm Xhad he not gone to prison.
So if you end up being famous,do that and do it well.
(21:55):
No one else does it.
Quite the same.
How you do anything is how youdo everything.
You have taken the road home.
You are back.
You are back.
You are still challengingconvention, but it's mostly just
for fun.
Now, hi, I'm a sadist.
(22:31):
I'm a sexual sadist,psychological sadist.
I'm an all-aroundgeneral-interest USA Today
sadist.
I contain multitudes andthey're all sadists.
I used to think it might beokay to be a sadist as long as I
felt bad about it, but thatwasn't much fun.
Now I feel good about itbecause I am the best kind of
sadist.
(22:51):
I'm a sadist with a heart ofgold.
For many years I repressed mykinks, worried they might make
me a bad person.
I still carry around a lot ofshame and frustration and I want
to take it out on someone whoappreciates it.
That's my kind of sadism, thegood kind of sadism, sadism with
flakes of real gold, the kindyou'd bring home to meet your
(23:13):
mom if you had an unhappychildhood.
I want to hurt you in the waysthat most help you.
I want to torture youexquisitely, deliberately, in
ways that bring out your best Totickle you in the places you
can't reach yourself, until youreyes roll back in your head,
you see stars and you nearlypass out because you can't
breathe and you can't stopgiggling.
(23:34):
I go hard on myself.
I'm cruel at times.
I focus on my flaws and try toget better through a vigorous
and rigorous practice of toughlove.
It can be challenging andpainful at times.
I focus on my flaws and try toget better through a vigorous
and rigorous practice of toughlove.
It can be challenging andpainful at times, and if anyone
else followed me around andtalked to me the way I talk to
myself.
I might get a restraining order, but you know what it's worth
it Because it's good practicefor what I want to do to you?
(23:57):
I want to torture you in theways I've fashioned on myself,
knowing they're devastating andeffective, because I'm not just
a sadist, I'm a sadist with aheart of gold, and these are the
sacrifices I make on yourbehalf as well as my own behalf.
Consent is crucial, but consentalone is insufficient.
I prefer panting desperation.
(24:19):
I would never force you to doanything.
I want you to beg for it.
That's what I'm into.
It takes heart, guts and warmwelcoming orifices to submit to
a sadist of my caliber.
I honor that Respect.
Submissives are my personalheroes.
You make my life worth living.
I'm gonna make you pay for that.
It's customary to tip at least20%, but you're gonna wanna go
(24:43):
for 30.
Come for the cruelty, stay forthe compassion, or come for the
compassion and stay for thecruelty.
It's up to you.
Choose wisely.
If you screw it up, I'll letyou know.
I'm a sadist with the soul of apoet, the mind of a wizard and a
heart of rugged gold.
Come into my world.
You're gonna hate it here.
We're both gonna love that.
(25:04):
It means the world to me whenyou, let me be mean to you.
Love yourself, do it now.
Put yourself way ahead ofeveryone else, until you can't
even see them in your rearviewmirror and you're smoking them,
or you smoked them a long timeago and now you're so far ahead
they can't even smell the smoke,which they couldn't anyway,
(25:26):
because they died, because youkilled them.
Love yourself seriously.
You deserve it, even if youdon't.
If you do love yourself, thenyou will deserve it.
It could go in either direction.
Just start loving yourselfright now.
Get your hand down in yourpants, forget everyone else.
Hold them in contempt until itgets to the point where you're
(25:47):
like this is boring, I'm tiredof hating people, I'm just going
to forget they exist.
Then you got all the love tokeep for yourself.
Because if you love yourselfand you do it right and you
really put your back into it andyour heart into it and your
loins especially Because theonly person you ever want to be
attracted to is yourself,otherwise you're going to make a
(26:08):
fool of yourself and that's thelast thing you want to do.
If you love yourself, loveyourself hard, love yourself
passionately, love yourselfgently, tenderly You're the only
person who knows you the waythat you do.
Only you can, on the one hand,wreck shop and give yourself a
business and, on the other hand,really make yourself feel
special.
(26:28):
It can be hard to love yourselfwhen you have all the facts.
You know your flaws, but youcan always change your mind
about things or at least take adifferent perspective.
Multiple things can be truesimultaneously, even if they
seem to contradict each other.
You're the kind of person thatcan get that because you love
yourself.
You already do.
(26:48):
It's not hard to do.
If you didn't, would you behere?
Maybe you're here specificallybecause you don't love yourself
enough or you don't think you do, and that ruins your
self-confidence, which makes ithard to love yourself.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care how you got hurt,use that.
I'm not even interested infixing it.
I'm interested in healing.
(27:12):
But it's not a problem to befixed because you are not broken
.
Use it.
It's probably not unique to you,although you are special.
We tend to have more things incommon than not.
There are a lot moresimilarities in our DNA than
there are differences, andthat's fine.
We have a lot of DNA in commonwith banana slugs.
It's nothing to feel bad about.
Banana slugs are probably thebest creatures on earth.
(27:32):
The modal banana slug is beingthe best damn banana slug it can
be.
How many humans can you saythat about?
The point is love yourself.
If you fail to do that, then itdoesn't matter.
If you love yourself, you cando whatever the hell you want.
There is no failure, onlyfeedback, until you die, and
(27:53):
death is the ultimate feedback.
And having died before, I cantell you it's nothing to be
afraid of and it's a hell of aride.
Sure, be afraid of it all youwant to if you're going to be
scared.
You may as well be scared ofsomething inevitable.
Make it your intention no, makeit your plan to die with
(28:13):
nothing left to say, becauseyou've said and done things that
you wanted to do and you'vedone some people and they've
enjoyed it quite a bit, becauseyou love yourself.
That frees you to not careabout anyone else.
The only way to take care ofsomeone is to not really care
about them.
If you are trying to fill ahole in yourself, you're not
going to be able to take care ofother people.
(28:35):
You're not really going to seethem for what they are.
You're just going to see themvis-a-vis how they can make you
feel complete.
And they can't, because they'restupid idiots, they're
incompetent and weak, and you'llsee that when you see them for
who they really are, and thenyou'll see that you need to take
care of them and you'll be busydoing that and you won't have
time to waste, and that'll be abig improvement over right now,
(28:58):
because you're wasting a lot oftime beating up on yourself.
You can beat up on yourselfforever.
It accomplishes nothing.
If you love yourself, onceyou'll be amazed at what you can
do.
You'll be swinging itabsolutely, killing it?
Yeah, of course I love myself.
Who wouldn't?
It's self-evident that I'm thebest.
The self is what I care about,myself specifically.
You can care about yourself allyou want.
I'm good.
(29:18):
Thanks, love yourself.
Once you've had it, you can'tgo back.
It's delicious.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
You're delicious, and you're about to find out just
how delicious you are when youlove yourself.
Speaker 3 (30:20):
People are leaky.
If you know what to look for,you can figure out what they're
about To an alarming extent.
First of all, they're allinsane.
Everyone is absolutely nuts ifyou get to know them well enough
.
It's a spectrum.
I'm not dogging anyone inparticular.
We're all kind of awful.
(30:40):
We are creatures that inpursuit of dopamine to our own
perpetual detriment, we have noability to think in any sort of
long-term way and that's justhow we're designed.
We were smart enough to createan environment that we are
utterly incapable of living in,that is just light years ahead
of where we will ever be so muchthat it's humiliated us and
(31:02):
it's driving us back towards theocean, toward the caves.
That's why, we're treatingourselves so poorly.
What we really respond to isintermittent rewards.
If we get what we think we want, it bores us to death or it
finds some more spectacular wayto kill us.
If we're lucky If we get what wethink we want or what we say we
(31:24):
want, even if those are thesame thing.
It's infuriating.
We want to get what we reallywant.
We don't know what that is andit's driving us barking mad.
We deserve what we get becausewe're a pathetic species and I
say that's what people are like.
Give them what they really want, which is torture.
It's intermittent rewards,push-pull, it's manipulation.
(31:46):
If you're into it, you shouldbe into it freely and everything
should be above board.
That requires you knowing thatyou're into it.
If you don't know that you'reinto it, you may find
significantly more dangerousways to get into it
unconsciously, as opposed tojust going to a sex dungeon like
a normal person.
If you do that, I'll give youall the intermittent rewards you
(32:08):
can handle.
I'll give you more than youwant.
I will give you what yourespond to so hard that it
breaks your simple little brain,and that will help you get over
yourself, which is really thegoal of all of this, because
when you get over yourself, it'svery easy to get into other
people's pants.
If that's something you're into, because you get to know other
(32:31):
people and your sense of energyor intuition, whatever it is use
it and you will discover it.
When you begin to seriouslyinterrogate your own ego, you'll
be surprised, shocked even, andalso considered very charming
by people that you are suddenlyauthentically interested in,
(32:51):
because you don't exist.
You're the least interestingtopic on earth, and so am I.
You're interesting to me and Ihope that I'm interesting to you
.
I think that's a safeassumption at this point to some
degree.
If I'm not give money to KeiChung and tell them to cancel me
, if I ever become actuallyfamous, I want to be canceled
(33:11):
immediately.
I think fame is a stupid thingto want and it's hell on earth
to have as evidenced by the waythat it affects people, which I
don't In very, only very rarecases is a net good.
I want to be a wealthy,powerful, unseen master of
(33:33):
puppets and if I ever get tooclose to the sun, if the eye of
Sauron turns itself on me and Iget actually famous, please
cancel me as quickly as you canand as soon as you can when I
have nothing to lose.
I'm not emotionally attached tomy mansion yet.
When you get over yourself, youwill become much more aware of
(33:54):
other people's experience in anembodied way, in a sensitive,
empathetic way, but in a waythat you are aware of.
So it's not totallyoverwhelming like out-of-control
empathy for someone who clearlydoes not deserve it.
This is the kind of empathy youcan get good information from,
like.
You will start to noticepeople's body language and
(34:17):
energy and sartorial choices andother indicators of how their
life is going and what theirvalues are, etc.
Their self-image, how itcorrelates with their actual
station in life, etc.
Their self-image, how itcorrelates with their actual
station in life.
All that will becometransparently clear.
You'll notice it so hard youdon't notice that.
You notice it and maybe you'rethinking I don't want to get
(34:37):
over myself.
Or like okay, I'll kill my ego,emerson, but why don't you go
first?
I was like well, it was my ideayou go first.
That's how the system works,the system I created.
This is a revolution.
I'm staging a coup on yoursystem.
I don't think it's going to bebloodless.
You never asked me what I'minto.
(34:58):
You're going to find out.
It's going to be a long weekendIf you decide to hang on to
your ego.
You can still get a pretty goodread on people by paying
attention.
You can still get a pretty goodread on people by paying
attention.
You can intellectualize it.
You can look for the four orfive layers of meaning that are
in the modal joke.
People joke in different waysand all of them are delivery
(35:22):
systems for honesty that theyare afraid to express in earnest
.
That's what makes them goodjokes.
Funny to adults is thattragically unconscious
self-revelation that people doall the time because people are
leaky.
You can also hear it in theirmetaphors.
What language, what slang, whatargo, what pattern do they use
(35:46):
to describe how they see andinteract with the world?
What jargon do they leverage tointerface on a holistic,
ecological level?
Are they balls out or balls tothe wall?
People tell you what they'reinto.
Presentation matters.
If you don't exist,presentation is everything.
You can't afford to forget that, but most people do, and that
(36:11):
can tell you a lot about them.
You can figure people out, andthat comes with all sorts of
advantages.
But I'm going to tell you rightnow once you see this you can't
unsee it when you realize youhave the ability, capacity and
willingness to do it, and thenyou do it, that becomes an
obligation.
Be prepared.
(36:31):
Another jewel that I justdropped on you from my stash of
family jewels I may be anincreasingly eccentric,
born-again bachelor in paradisenow, a little rough around the
edges, a little rough around theedges.
A project, a nice guy on Indica, but at one time I was a Cub
(36:52):
Scout and I'm telling you,bitches, be ready, thank you.
(37:39):
How about this?
Pick a location, a liminalpoint, somewhere you normally
pass through without thinkingtoo much of it, because therein
lies opportunity, and block offsome time.
Give it an hour to sit there ina state of meditation, or
whatever else there is besidesmeditation a liminal state.
(38:03):
Be with that and ask yourselfwhat, what is this?
Allow yourself unfetteredobservation, set aside your
assumptions and your heuristicsand whatever you're looking for
and ask what is this?
Not rhetorically, but out ofcuriosity, and bring to that the
curiosity of a Sherlock Holmes.
You will not stop seeking andyou will not stop getting more
(38:26):
granular until you find perhapsat some point.
Zoom out and then you'll see it, or you'll do something else.
In this, right now, we areasking what is this?
And we are asking through oursenses and we are perceiving
through pictures, sounds andfeelings.
Not answers.
Not answers, but more questions, a network of questions, one
(38:50):
sprouting out of the other.
And of course, like allbeautiful things, this too must
be ruined, and as humans, we arethe ones to do it.
And you're going to ruin it inone of the coolest ways, which
is by making art, although youmust not try to be cool.
That is the enemy of greatnesswhen it comes to observation of
(39:13):
this sort in what some wouldcall creativity.
But we understand to beforgetting what you forgot, how
to do, and knowing that you canunknow because you unknew.
And here you are feeling it andyou're gonna ruin it by writing
about it, making a song, amural, whatever your preferred
(39:35):
avenue of expression is.
Puppetry is big as well.
Some of it is part of therobust fetish community.
Some of it is not even,arguably, porn, it is just pure
art, as much as art can be pure,purely impure puppetry.
(39:56):
If that's what you do, do,puppetry about what you are
feeling, experiencing, what youare, because you are the flow of
human experience and you'regoing to make a beautifully
imperfect record of a failure totranslate that experience.
(40:16):
You might be the first one whogets it right.
The fact that you are arrogantenough to try is an absolutely
magical thing, and you are abeautiful brat and you're going
to get the bruising that you areso obviously cruising for in a
bit, but you're going to makeart as an invitation to that,
(40:36):
which I will accept when thetime comes.
But for now, you're going towatch other people, namely
people with names that you don'tknow, that is, strangers, or
relatives who are strangersbecause you don't know that is
strangers, or relatives who arestrangers Because you don't
recognize them as relativesbecause they're too far out on
the family tree that sproutedout when it was allowed to
(40:59):
become what it was.
Maybe they know you.
Maybe the barista that youdon't have a crush on because
you're oblivious and you're notpaying attention, has a crush on
you and is telegraphing thatand is frustrated by your
obliviousness, but at the sametime, that makes you dumb enough
(41:20):
to be hot, which just inflamesthe passion of this person that
you don't know but is part ofyour world in some sense.
You're certainly part of theirs, and the part of you that is
part of their world is morepurchase in reality, one could
argue than the part of you thatonly lives in your head.
But let's get back to this,because this is all we get.
(41:43):
There's nothing after this.
The meek inherit nothing.
Do it to it like you always doabout this time, because the
time is now.
So observe, notice theassumptions that are coming up,
the ways in which you arestubborn, in which you fall back
on existing intellectualcapital and insist on fighting
(42:06):
the last battle and using theold metaphors that don't work
here.
Your current state of immersionis a platform for interrogation
, exploration, fornication withthis.
Whatever this is, we'll neverknow.
That's what makes it fun, andit's full of signs and symbols.
(42:28):
Life is but a dream.
It's also a dream, yes, andit's more than a dream.
It's about as good as it getsin terms of magic.
You are making up a lot of this.
You are arguing, flirting andperverting with versions of
(42:50):
yourself, and when you recognizethat you might get over it long
enough to have a really goodorgasm or at least get inspired
by one of these symbols, whatdoes?
it mean.
Who cares?
What is it about?
What is it saying or singing orsliding into your DMs about,
through interpretive dance Onthe low?
(43:13):
Though, let one of thosedetails inspire you, one of
those little synchronicities,coincidences, noises that are
songs, that are weeds that areflowers, let it happen.
Leave it up to what you used tothink of as chance Throw dice,
like Luke Reinhardt's novel theDice man, or a writing group
(43:34):
that I used to be part of inChicago called the
Soon-to-Be-Pretentious Writers,where we would hang out in the
library at Harold Washingtonwhich is a pretty bitchin'
library and we would grab booksoff the shelves.
Obviously there would besomething about it that hooked
us, but we wouldn't think aboutthat too much because we would
grab enough books to dip intoand put our finger on part of a
(43:59):
page and then write inspired bythat.
So it was kind of like improvprompts.
It was a collaboration with thecosmos and the chaos and it was
fun.
You can do that.
You can steal that idea, whichis an idea about stealing ideas.
That's how ideas are oftentransmitted.
(44:20):
Do that until it's done andthen close with gratitude.
If you want to, you can sayamen at the end of it.
I don't kink shame unlessyou're into that.
Say thank you for the question.
Know that you gotta go back andthere's no way to fully
integrate this, but that createsan opportunity to understand
(44:43):
the things that you've felt,which some people don't get a
chance to feel until rightbefore they die.
This is truly a luxury.
Now you are living in your city.
People ask Henry David Thoreauwhy he didn't travel the world.
He said I've traveledextensively in Concord, which
was his town.
Now you've done that where youare.
(45:03):
I hope it's a serious city, nota made-up city like Boston.
But you know, bloom whereyou're planted.
(45:48):
Towering talent, terrifyingtenacity, scarlet obscura, the
toast of la getting buttered up,smoking hot, distinctive,
pleasant smell.
Was she gonna get burned?
She was willing to continue herconquest.
Film, fashion and performanceart.
Rest with with the questions.
(46:09):
Los Angeles, where reality is adream, dreams become reality
and sometimes life can be awaking nightmare.
Or is that simply oneinterpretation?
Certain people thrive on thissort of ambiguity.
Despite its heavy-handedsymbolism, clunky cliches,
(46:29):
obvious and smarmy moral appeals, what is called the square-up
reel at the end, where all ofthe debauchery in the first two
acts is justified, made notpalatable but put in a context
that the normies can understand.
It's a place where lost soulsgo to find themselves and others
(46:52):
go to lose themselves.
When Scarlet first touched downat LAX, she was Amber
McCallaghan, an intense youngwoman from Nova Scotia, blessed
and cursed with a rich innerlife.
Despite her bashfulness, shewas cerebral, synesthetic, wild
and yet acutely specific sexualfantasies that drove her to a
(47:14):
certain kind of frothing notunpleasant insanity, made it
hard for her to play well withothers in the real world and
easy for her to make unforcederrors which, it was said, would
go on her permanent record.
She was bullied and takenadvantage of.
She found sex to be a wonderfulform of artistic expression.
(47:36):
Unfortunately, one of herpartners bragged to her friends,
gossiped to their friends andpretty soon people were putting
all kinds of labels on her andputting her in buckets Not in a
fun way.
There's nothing quite asdissatisfying as finding
yourself in conflict with peoplewho have already permanently
made up their minds abouteverything.
(47:57):
So she got out.
She went to Los Angeles.
She had struggles.
Her car broke down.
Her car got broken into, herhot plate got stolen.
Suddenly the car did not seemlike such a pleasant place to
live, and neither did LosAngeles.
Just as she was about to giveup, she ran into Maxwell Manman,
edgy avant-garde director thecritics call brutally
(48:20):
transgressive and calls his ownwork quote porn with ideas.
Unquote In the matter ofphilosopher Georges Bataille,
who communicated his anarchistideas through buckwild,
hallucinatory polemics of thesolar anus and works of smut
such as Story of the Eye.
Maxwell Banwin wanted to screwthe world in its mind.
(48:44):
His work included violence,vandalism, loitering, criminal
acts of provocation.
The truth of his work was thathe wanted to be God and he
wanted the work to be his finestcreation.
And it was just never as good inreality as it had been in his
imagination before, and thatmade him feel insecure, which
(49:05):
made him mad at being a cultleader, which is where some
people land when they try to beGod but don't quite get there.
He wasn't doing a great job ofthat too.
He didn't trust himself, and itshowed.
But he did that one thing thatScarlet Obscura liked, and she
did a few things that he liked,and even in a metropolitan area
(49:26):
of more than 12 million peoplethey just couldn't imagine
finding other partners who hadthe hookup for those things,
because they got it like that.
Most people don't get it,certainly not like that.
She conquered fashion bywearing a particular magical
shade of lime green, contrastingwith just the right hue of
(49:46):
silver.
Her films were reinvigoratingthe whole art form.
She released them throughproxies so as not to upset Maxl,
but even in disowning them,there's nothing she could do to
dampen the crackling heat oftheir brilliance.
One of the things that limitedher freedom to move was her
empathy with.
(50:06):
Maxl which came from having herown unresolved inner conflict.
We need ideas, good ones, rightnow.
(50:42):
The clock's ticking, anybody.
If you've got any ideas, I'lleven take bad ones.
Step up, you gotta have badideas to have good ideas.
I won't rag you down too hard.
Okay, no takers.
You got to get some ideastonight and I'm going to give
you a simple process for how todo that.
So listen up.
First of all, do your research.
(51:03):
Consult the experts, read thearticles, read the books, read
the scientific white papers,read the cranks, read the
unreliable sources, read thegarbage, know the whole spectrum
of opinions and decide whichones to disagree with, and know
what you're talking about.
When you do you don't have alot of time, so don't do too
(51:24):
much research.
Do all the research you canhandle.
It might not be that muchbecause you're an amateur.
I'm a professional.
I learn everything.
I do extreme amounts ofresearch.
I devour all of the materialthat I can gather about the
subject and then the rest of itcomes my way, because once I'm
charged up, I'm a magnet forinformation and I get thoroughly
(51:47):
immersed in a subject, to thepoint where there's no
distinction between me and thisidea, this body of knowledge.
The borders are porous.
I don't know where my life ends.
I've died five times and Idon't have to tell about it.
I don't know where I end andthe thing that I'm researching
begins.
It's almost like I've alwaysknown, it always will, and
(52:09):
there's no history, no beginning, no end.
I just know.
I just know, I always knew.
I just have to forget that Iforgot that I know and get out
of my own way.
And then you begin the processof working over that idea, that
material in your mind, beatingit up viciously, asking the
(52:30):
difficult questions,interrogating it.
What happened on June 7th?
Your story doesn't add up.
Ask the hard questions Make itembarrassing, but it'll respect
you if you are courageous enoughto get in there and be annoying
, and it'll respect you as apeer because it's used to being
(52:51):
treated with kid gloves and it'ssick of that.
It wants somebody it canrespect and that's you.
So you will become intimatefriends with your subject matter
and you can puzzle and ponder,have a conversation with this
material that you're researching.
It turns into an argument, thatturns into a fight, that turns
(53:11):
into a rant on your part and theidea is just sitting there and
taking it like a bitch becauseyou know what you're talking
about and you're giving it thebusiness right now.
You're speaking hard,uncomfortable truths that it
doesn't want to hear, that italready kind of knows, but it
needs to hear, it needs to learnwhat it already knows.
And then, when all the pretensehas been stripped away, you can
(53:36):
put on a mask and you can danceby the light of a bonfire, with
your subject matter, under thelight of the moon, and you can
also have one of those glowsticks that you wave around.
You can listen to techno musicor big beat music from the late
80s or early 90s, as you reallyget to know your idea, but then
(53:57):
that's it for a while.
You need a break.
Already.
This has gotten too intense tooquickly.
So you need to step away fromthe problem, from the issue that
you're dealing with, that youneed to get ideas about.
You need to forget all about it, forget it exists.
First, distract yourself, anddistract yourself until you're
(54:18):
so thoroughly distracted thatyou don't need to be distracted
anymore.
What you want to do is stayfocused because you're focused
on something other than thisthing that you're not thinking
about.
You have thoroughly forgottenabout it.
Indulge in whatever form of fun,gets you out of your head and
into your body and into theworld, be it base jumping, be it
(54:42):
the consumption of poisonousfish that can kill you in
high-end seafood restaurants.
But it doesn't, because thechef knows exactly what he's
doing.
He's one of the only people inthe world that can serve this
fish without murdering a bunchof people.
He used to have rivals, butthey're all imprisoned now for
(55:02):
negligent homicide.
And you can do psychedelicdrugs or do something with
permanent effects.
Psychedelic drugs make you tripfor a couple of hours, give
yourself brain damage, sniffglue, hit yourself in the head
with a hammer and you willtotally forget about your idea.
You will dumb it down, makeyourself an idiot and then you
(55:24):
can be receptive.
You can cultivate thebeginner's mind mindset and you
can just sit with that and allowit to be what it is, get in the
fluid flow of experience,because you're not overthinking
it anymore.
You're significantly underthinking it.
You've ruined your brain, butthat's good, because you used to
think you were smart.
(55:45):
Now you know that you knownothing.
You don't even know it.
You just kind of act on it.
It's one of your many unknown,knowns ideological assumptions
that form the framework of yourlife.
And you are now taking a break,you're resting, you're
breathing and you're waiting foryour idea to come in.
(56:09):
It may come in a flash ofinsight, a blinding white light,
life-changing epiphany.
All of a sudden, eureka, you'vegot it.
You have already changed theworld.
You just need to act on this.
You better act on it right now,because you're going to be
heartbroken if somebody elseacts on it first.
But first submit to the idea ina sexual way, masochistically.
(56:33):
Let it punk you out and makeyou its bitches.
Then you'll really know whatit's capable of, what your idea
desires.
You are merely a servantcreated for its pleasure.
You'll let that happen andyou'll like it.
You will love it, even becauseyou love your idea and you kind
of love this new feeling oflosing control, because you felt
(56:53):
like you had to be in controlfor so much of your life.
Now you don't have to worryabout it.
Now you're dumb and you'retaking it hard from this new
idea that just chose you.
It's you think it off.
It's like it was out there.
It was in the ether, floatingabout bouncing around, and then
you were just there.
You were there to receive, andnow you're really receiving.
(57:14):
You will now endear yourself tothe idea because, in a sense,
every masochist tops from thebottom.
Now it's time to take your ideaout on the town, put it in the
mix, make sure you get it outthere, make sure that you break
through the noise using all ofthe techniques, the persuasion
rhetoric, direct mail.
(57:34):
Marketing is a good place tolook for inspiration because
they always go right into it andbecause it's conversion.
They're serious about gettingpeople to take action.
If you're just talking, if it'sjust food for thought
chin-stroking think PC Beltway,elitist crap you're telling
people about their lives likethey don't already know.
(57:55):
But he's gonna listen.
Give them something to do.
People are waiting to be toldwhat to do.
Don't keep them waiting.
Let the idea evolve.
Be receptive to feedback, butdon't really care what other
people think.
You know this idea on anintimate basis.
You know what it wants.
You know its most perverse,perverted desires.
You are the shepherd for theidea.
(58:17):
But let it evolve.
He wants to.
Everything always changes.
The idea gets better and betterand pretty soon it changes the
world.
You might not talk for a while,but it will always live on in
your heart and vice versa.
K-chung, los Angeles.
(58:40):
Emerson Dameron's MedicatedMinutes LA's number one
avant-garde personal developmentprogram.
1630 AM.
Kchungradioorg First Wednesdaysof the month, after which it
becomes the only good podcast.
Bye, bye, outro Music.
About to hit you with the last knock-knock.
Emerson Dameron can't ever fly.
Medicaid medicine city fun time.
Harmony for slice, like a son'schild.
Tune in and let's ride.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
This is here to go, mine.
We're ignited.
We turn the mundane to delight.
We're on topics.
We ain't fighting.
We got you rolling on the floor.
Can't stop.
From the punchline to the mic,drop LA's number one.
I've on card punched it all.
Development program, home offans, mercedes and vice-size.
(00:40):
Eat by the frill is Gage FromLos Angeles.
Let me be sage Lies.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
The time has come to pass.
Oh, this is happening.
This is very much happening.
This, in fact, is happeningmore than anything has happened
for a long time around here.
It's happening and I'msurprised that you are not
prepared, or at least accepting.
You had ample time.
There were many dress rehearsalsin which you participated.
(01:27):
You didn't think it was gonnahappen.
What do you think this is?
You had all the sameinformation everyone else did
and yet came to wildly differentconclusions which put you way
out on the crank fringe and youare drummed out of scholarship
on this topic because you arewrong.
(01:49):
You knew that it was going tohappen, but here's how you
defeated yourself.
I'm going to tell you exactlyhow you kicked your own ass and
made yourself lose when I gaveyou a perfectly good shot to win
because I love you and we gotit like that and I don't even
care.
I'm over that.
(02:09):
Now I don't have to win.
To win or have fun.
To have fun, you can imaginewhere it goes from there, or
maybe not.
Maybe you're dumber than Ithought if you thought that
there was anything you could doto stop this from happening.
I know you don't want it tohappen.
That sways me in the directionof doing it.
The fact that it bothers you isin the plus column of reasons
(02:34):
to do it.
If you pretended to like it, Iprobably wouldn't be convinced,
because you're not good at lying.
Astounding considering thefrequency in which you do it.
The only person you are foolingis yourself and you believed by
telling me not to do it Noteven asking.
It wasn't even worth it to bepolite to try to get what you
(02:59):
maybe thought or wanted tobelieve that you want, which was
your freedom, which youabsolutely cannot handle
Self-respect.
You wouldn't know what to dowith it if you had it.
You don't want it.
It's going to make you sick,poison, or the medicine is in
the depths, and we both knowthat you're lightweight.
(03:19):
That's not a good or a badthing, but it was your
responsibility to factor it in.
Surely by now you know your ownweaknesses.
It baffles me and I find ithilarious.
You thought that I wasn't goingto do this because you didn't
want me to do it, or you thoughtthere was some move you were
going to pull off at the lastminute that was going to stop it
(03:41):
from happening.
You missed the bus.
If you even were at the busstop, you really don't know
where the bus is.
You're too arrogant to ride thebus, so you're going to destroy
the environment and breakyourself financially by buying a
luxury car that you can'tafford.
You are at liberty to do that.
(04:04):
I'm gonna bust on you about itbecause I care.
I didn't care.
I would just watch youhumiliate yourself.
I would enjoy that, but there'sa lot of other forms of that
content out there for me toconsume.
I've got more suffering in myto-watch-later queue that I can
(04:24):
really handle.
So much like sex.
I'm turning it down Veryselective.
My standards may be too high.
I'm totally okay with that.
I'm gonna wait for someonespecial or something, some idea
somewhere, some why you reallythought this wasn't going to
(04:45):
happen because you didn't wantit to and that was it.
You weren't even going to do it.
You want this to happen becauseyou're sick and it's delicious
and delightful and I love you.
This is Emerson Dameron'sMedicated Minutes, LA's number
one avant-garde personaldevelopment program.
I'm Emerson, I do it all, so noone except me can stop it from
(05:07):
happening.
I produce it, I write it, Iperform it Pretty much
everything with the 1630 AMkchungradioorg
medicated-minutescom.
Here we go.
(05:28):
It's already almost over.
Take a beat, breathe into theexperience of being here and ask
yourself what am I so afraid of?
Maybe you're afraid of missingsome essential life experience.
(05:52):
You're afraid you already have,or that it doesn't matter
because nothing does.
Maybe it's nothing, maybeyou're just a regular nerves
McGee.
Or maybe you're afraid of yourown glorious cataclysmic power,
the riotous multitudes youcontain.
You are smart enough to knowhow nearly infinitely ignorant
(06:13):
you are, but you're not toosmart to be hot, and you may
already be a satanic Buddhist.
Nothing is good or bad inisolation, only in context.
The Buddha and the Beastmasterare a good team.
This, right here, is all youget.
Life is for living up downacross, diagonally, sideways,
(06:34):
because nothing matters.
You may already be a SatanicBuddhist.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
I'm sorry.
In this baroque dream, everytouch is pure.
Oh satanic Buddha, make ourpassions endure.
Submit to the fire your torment.
We find bliss.
(07:25):
With a desperate plea, wesurrender to your kiss.
Thank you From the shadows rise.
(08:23):
Hear the ancient call In thetemple, where dark and light
entwine With desire burning, ahymn to thee we sing.
Where souls revolve With afervent pulse, our voices will
(08:58):
ignite, oh Satanic Buddha.
Guide through the endless nightIn silken murmurs.
(09:22):
We gather in delight as themoon dances with stars in
twilight.
Our hearts aflame an oath toyou.
We bring, o satanic Buddha,where our desires cling, divine
(09:44):
and decadent.
Our voices ascend Under neonfrom it's so surreal, with
everyone's.
Our laughter seals the deal Ina flight of fancy psychedelic
trance.
Oh, cosmic Buddha, join in ourdance With a swagger in our step
(10:12):
.
We conquer the night in akaleidoscope world.
Nothing feels quite right In acosmic cabaret, in a cosmic
cabaret With velvet shadows andglitter in the view.
We tip our hats to a laughingBuddha's grin.
In this world, dance wherecolours lead the way, with never
(10:55):
not be celebrating that youdon't exist.
Choose what you believe and bespecific what you wish.
Indulge your sacred passions,don't complain when you can quit
, never take it personal anddon't take any With equanimity,
(11:23):
with lust, in polarity.
We trust you are everything youlove and hate and knew it was
Satanic Buddha's helping you getthrough it.
Through which cause, oh Buddha,oh Beastmaster Ascended.
(11:54):
Aesthetics were the gloriousdisaster.
Oh Buddha, oh Beastmaster.
A synesthetic world and gloryand disaster.
Speaker 3 (12:09):
I'm not going to let you go, thank you, thanks for
(13:35):
watching.
I only know that I know nothing,said Socrates, one of the
(13:59):
notoriously wisest people whoever lived, to his eventual
detriment in that, like almosteveryone at the time, he had an
excruciating, senseless death.
At this point he would still bealive, but who knows what he
would be up to?
Probably nothing good.
(14:19):
How that translates in my lovelanguage that we use in this
house is that one must possess acertain acuity to really commit
to the ultimate bit, which isthe adoption of a beginner's
mind, as the great DT Suzukicalled it, to approach with a
(14:41):
willingness to override yourassumptions, which is
intellectual honesty, whichrequires some emotional honesty,
because your emotions willraise a ruckus when you start to
actually embrace dangerousideas and ask obvious and
painful questions about what isgoing on, as you have.
(15:03):
And you know that there's morethan this.
You know that the world is notjust brutally transactional.
You've seen butterflies at play, which is all that it takes to
know that life is about pleasureto the extent that it is a
bloody struggle and a slog thatis only in service to play,
never the other way around.
(15:24):
Pleasure and play the embraceof anger and fear and suffering
and risk.
That's not what life is about,because life is not about
anything.
But if it were, it would allfall roughly under that rubric.
You are ready to unlearn whatyou know?
Disclose what is within you,because if you bring forth what
(15:46):
is within you, what is withinyou will save you and perhaps a
couple of other people who knowyou well.
If you don't bring forth whatis within you, what is within
you will destroy you.
Hopefully you're not in thesubway, because it would affect
other people the way that yourlies affect those around you.
I can only speak for myself, butyou know, you know.
(16:09):
If you know, you know, youdefinitely know, and it's time
to wake up.
This is your call to adventure.
You see the chaos.
You see the darkness.
You see how the light would notexist without the darkness.
You get it.
So reach out and get it, gripit, grab it, have it.
(16:30):
Don't be shocked when you slipheadlong into nihilism.
If you're lucky, it's easier toget out of than narcissism, not
as damaging.
Because what are you going todo?
There's nothing to do.
There's no reason to doanything.
The fact that meaning is notfixed makes you feel that it
(16:53):
does not exist, because you arenot used to looking for it in
its unconventional, nebulous,fractal form that I am smart
enough to know that I can'ttotally explain, and the fact
that there's stuff that neitherone of us can adequately explain
is enough reason to keepexploring, which you do
(17:14):
Eventually you accept the call.
Generally, it happens one of twoways.
You get on Mr Toad's wild rideand smoke 5-MeO-DMT and you free
yourself from yourself for a15-minute slice of time.
That is the longest 15 minutesof your life and everyone else's
(17:36):
, or at least your ancestors,all of whom will be in you when
you come home, or rather, youwill recognize that they were
there all the time and they haveseen everything that you've
done, that you've got nothing tohide, what you feared has come
to pass.
That might convince you.
You might be fortunate enoughto find yourself in the
(17:57):
circumstances where it happens.
Otherwise, it could be a songoverheard in the pharmacy, or it
could be some sort of talismanthat you get in the mail that
was supposed to go to yourneighbor and you were going to
give it to them, even though youdon't really know them.
Well, yeah, you know who theyare and they were kind of
(18:18):
unpleasant when you encounteredthem on the stairs when they
were coming up with groceriesand you were coming down and you
had the music on and it waslike that by Future and Metro
Boomin featuring Kendrick Lamar,and you were kind of in your
own end zone and you didn't seethem.
And now maybe they think you'rea dick, which seems kind of
judgy.
(18:38):
You're going to give it backanyway.
You didn't intend to open theirmail.
That's not the kind of thingyou would have done, except
carelessly.
But then a song came on yourDiscover Weekly with lyrics that
specifically instructed you tokeep this thing as a talisman
for the good of not justyourself and your neighbor, but
(18:59):
the entire scope of humanity,the sweep of its history and
future, and infinity andnothingness.
You, me, them, everybody, allof them are now at your throat
Because by crossing thethreshold, by becoming a true
sucker for love, you've joinedthe creative class.
(19:20):
You have immediately ascendedits hierarchy because you know
that it's meaningless, whichmakes it easy to game as a fun
diversion on your fool's journeyinto genius.
Now you've got all kinds ofhaters coming at you,
challengers, people who thinkthis is a zero-sum game, when
you've been begging them to justopen their eyes and other
(19:41):
orifices and mouths and sensegates to this and understand it.
Maybe they can't, they certainlywon't.
That doesn't really phase you.
You're not even really thinkingabout what you're doing anymore
because you've overcome yourfear and ego and you're free to
explore and let the criticsdecide, and historians, teachers
of the classes that will betaught on you and your approach
(20:05):
to life as a work of art, how itbrought you to sing the absurd
and hear it reverberate off thewalls of the innermost cave.
And get the cosmic joke andunderstand that it's on you and
look into the abyss and see howabyssy it is and understand that
human consciousness on you.
And look into the abyss and seehow abyssy it is and understand
that human consciousness itselfis hell.
(20:25):
It's nature's perfect torturedevice and you're willing to get
zoned by the cosmic joke, toget roasted and like a phoenix
reborn, having transcended andincluded your ordeal, as your
wounds turn to scabs and thoseturn to scars that are bitchin'.
You have embraced the chaos andyou're brand at home but in a
(20:50):
palatable, if not highlyinfectious, certainly catchy
form, and everybody's dancing toit and all the quotidian BS
continues apace.
But nothing can get to you.
You are free, you are loved andyou are absolutely worshipped
by fans who love you.
Be careful Anyone who puts youon a pedestal is going to treat
(21:13):
you like crap when you fall.
You know this well by nowthrough experience.
Still, there are certain fringebenefits to having fans.
I don't want fame.
If I ever get seriouslyactually famous, I hope that
you'll cancel me immediately.
I think I've given you plentyof ammunition for that.
I'm not kidding.
(21:34):
Fame is unconditionallyterrible.
Nothing is really unconditionalIf you can enjoy it.
You are Willie Nelson.
You are the American Buddha.
You are one of the elect.
It drives most people insane.
Those who thrive will save usall.
We wouldn't have had Malcolm Xhad he not gone to prison.
So if you end up being famous,do that and do it well.
(21:55):
No one else does it.
Quite the same.
How you do anything is how youdo everything.
You have taken the road home.
You are back.
You are back.
You are still challengingconvention, but it's mostly just
for fun.
Now, hi, I'm a sadist.
(22:31):
I'm a sexual sadist,psychological sadist.
I'm an all-aroundgeneral-interest USA Today
sadist.
I contain multitudes andthey're all sadists.
I used to think it might beokay to be a sadist as long as I
felt bad about it, but thatwasn't much fun.
Now I feel good about itbecause I am the best kind of
sadist.
(22:51):
I'm a sadist with a heart ofgold.
For many years I repressed mykinks, worried they might make
me a bad person.
I still carry around a lot ofshame and frustration and I want
to take it out on someone whoappreciates it.
That's my kind of sadism, thegood kind of sadism, sadism with
flakes of real gold, the kindyou'd bring home to meet your
(23:13):
mom if you had an unhappychildhood.
I want to hurt you in the waysthat most help you.
I want to torture youexquisitely, deliberately, in
ways that bring out your best Totickle you in the places you
can't reach yourself, until youreyes roll back in your head,
you see stars and you nearlypass out because you can't
breathe and you can't stopgiggling.
(23:34):
I go hard on myself.
I'm cruel at times.
I focus on my flaws and try toget better through a vigorous
and rigorous practice of toughlove.
It can be challenging andpainful at times.
I focus on my flaws and try toget better through a vigorous
and rigorous practice of toughlove.
It can be challenging andpainful at times, and if anyone
else followed me around andtalked to me the way I talk to
myself.
I might get a restraining order, but you know what it's worth
it Because it's good practicefor what I want to do to you?
(23:57):
I want to torture you in theways I've fashioned on myself,
knowing they're devastating andeffective, because I'm not just
a sadist, I'm a sadist with aheart of gold, and these are the
sacrifices I make on yourbehalf as well as my own behalf.
Consent is crucial, but consentalone is insufficient.
I prefer panting desperation.
(24:19):
I would never force you to doanything.
I want you to beg for it.
That's what I'm into.
It takes heart, guts and warmwelcoming orifices to submit to
a sadist of my caliber.
I honor that Respect.
Submissives are my personalheroes.
You make my life worth living.
I'm gonna make you pay for that.
It's customary to tip at least20%, but you're gonna wanna go
(24:43):
for 30.
Come for the cruelty, stay forthe compassion, or come for the
compassion and stay for thecruelty.
It's up to you.
Choose wisely.
If you screw it up, I'll letyou know.
I'm a sadist with the soul of apoet, the mind of a wizard and a
heart of rugged gold.
Come into my world.
You're gonna hate it here.
We're both gonna love that.
(25:04):
It means the world to me whenyou, let me be mean to you.
Love yourself, do it now.
Put yourself way ahead ofeveryone else, until you can't
even see them in your rearviewmirror and you're smoking them,
or you smoked them a long timeago and now you're so far ahead
they can't even smell the smoke,which they couldn't anyway,
(25:26):
because they died, because youkilled them.
Love yourself seriously.
You deserve it, even if youdon't.
If you do love yourself, thenyou will deserve it.
It could go in either direction.
Just start loving yourselfright now.
Get your hand down in yourpants, forget everyone else.
Hold them in contempt until itgets to the point where you're
(25:47):
like this is boring, I'm tiredof hating people, I'm just going
to forget they exist.
Then you got all the love tokeep for yourself.
Because if you love yourselfand you do it right and you
really put your back into it andyour heart into it and your
loins especially Because theonly person you ever want to be
attracted to is yourself,otherwise you're going to make a
(26:08):
fool of yourself and that's thelast thing you want to do.
If you love yourself, loveyourself hard, love yourself
passionately, love yourselfgently, tenderly You're the only
person who knows you the waythat you do.
Only you can, on the one hand,wreck shop and give yourself a
business and, on the other hand,really make yourself feel
special.
(26:28):
It can be hard to love yourselfwhen you have all the facts.
You know your flaws, but youcan always change your mind
about things or at least take adifferent perspective.
Multiple things can be truesimultaneously, even if they
seem to contradict each other.
You're the kind of person thatcan get that because you love
yourself.
You already do.
(26:48):
It's not hard to do.
If you didn't, would you behere?
Maybe you're here specificallybecause you don't love yourself
enough or you don't think you do, and that ruins your
self-confidence, which makes ithard to love yourself.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I don't care how you got hurt,use that.
I'm not even interested infixing it.
I'm interested in healing.
(27:12):
But it's not a problem to befixed because you are not broken
.
Use it.
It's probably not unique to you,although you are special.
We tend to have more things incommon than not.
There are a lot moresimilarities in our DNA than
there are differences, andthat's fine.
We have a lot of DNA in commonwith banana slugs.
It's nothing to feel bad about.
Banana slugs are probably thebest creatures on earth.
(27:32):
The modal banana slug is beingthe best damn banana slug it can
be.
How many humans can you saythat about?
The point is love yourself.
If you fail to do that, then itdoesn't matter.
If you love yourself, you cando whatever the hell you want.
There is no failure, onlyfeedback, until you die, and
(27:53):
death is the ultimate feedback.
And having died before, I cantell you it's nothing to be
afraid of and it's a hell of aride.
Sure, be afraid of it all youwant to if you're going to be
scared.
You may as well be scared ofsomething inevitable.
Make it your intention no, makeit your plan to die with
(28:13):
nothing left to say, becauseyou've said and done things that
you wanted to do and you'vedone some people and they've
enjoyed it quite a bit, becauseyou love yourself.
That frees you to not careabout anyone else.
The only way to take care ofsomeone is to not really care
about them.
If you are trying to fill ahole in yourself, you're not
going to be able to take care ofother people.
(28:35):
You're not really going to seethem for what they are.
You're just going to see themvis-a-vis how they can make you
feel complete.
And they can't, because they'restupid idiots, they're
incompetent and weak, and you'llsee that when you see them for
who they really are, and thenyou'll see that you need to take
care of them and you'll be busydoing that and you won't have
time to waste, and that'll be abig improvement over right now,
(28:58):
because you're wasting a lot oftime beating up on yourself.
You can beat up on yourselfforever.
It accomplishes nothing.
If you love yourself, onceyou'll be amazed at what you can
do.
You'll be swinging itabsolutely, killing it?
Yeah, of course I love myself.
Who wouldn't?
It's self-evident that I'm thebest.
The self is what I care about,myself specifically.
You can care about yourself allyou want.
I'm good.
(29:18):
Thanks, love yourself.
Once you've had it, you can'tgo back.
It's delicious.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
You're delicious, and you're about to find out just
how delicious you are when youlove yourself.
Speaker 3 (30:20):
People are leaky.
If you know what to look for,you can figure out what they're
about To an alarming extent.
First of all, they're allinsane.
Everyone is absolutely nuts ifyou get to know them well enough
.
It's a spectrum.
I'm not dogging anyone inparticular.
We're all kind of awful.
(30:40):
We are creatures that inpursuit of dopamine to our own
perpetual detriment, we have noability to think in any sort of
long-term way and that's justhow we're designed.
We were smart enough to createan environment that we are
utterly incapable of living in,that is just light years ahead
of where we will ever be so muchthat it's humiliated us and
(31:02):
it's driving us back towards theocean, toward the caves.
That's why, we're treatingourselves so poorly.
What we really respond to isintermittent rewards.
If we get what we think we want, it bores us to death or it
finds some more spectacular wayto kill us.
If we're lucky If we get what wethink we want or what we say we
(31:24):
want, even if those are thesame thing.
It's infuriating.
We want to get what we reallywant.
We don't know what that is andit's driving us barking mad.
We deserve what we get becausewe're a pathetic species and I
say that's what people are like.
Give them what they really want, which is torture.
It's intermittent rewards,push-pull, it's manipulation.
(31:46):
If you're into it, you shouldbe into it freely and everything
should be above board.
That requires you knowing thatyou're into it.
If you don't know that you'reinto it, you may find
significantly more dangerousways to get into it
unconsciously, as opposed tojust going to a sex dungeon like
a normal person.
If you do that, I'll give youall the intermittent rewards you
(32:08):
can handle.
I'll give you more than youwant.
I will give you what yourespond to so hard that it
breaks your simple little brain,and that will help you get over
yourself, which is really thegoal of all of this, because
when you get over yourself, it'svery easy to get into other
people's pants.
If that's something you're into, because you get to know other
(32:31):
people and your sense of energyor intuition, whatever it is use
it and you will discover it.
When you begin to seriouslyinterrogate your own ego, you'll
be surprised, shocked even, andalso considered very charming
by people that you are suddenlyauthentically interested in,
(32:51):
because you don't exist.
You're the least interestingtopic on earth, and so am I.
You're interesting to me and Ihope that I'm interesting to you
.
I think that's a safeassumption at this point to some
degree.
If I'm not give money to KeiChung and tell them to cancel me
, if I ever become actuallyfamous, I want to be canceled
(33:11):
immediately.
I think fame is a stupid thingto want and it's hell on earth
to have as evidenced by the waythat it affects people, which I
don't In very, only very rarecases is a net good.
I want to be a wealthy,powerful, unseen master of
(33:33):
puppets and if I ever get tooclose to the sun, if the eye of
Sauron turns itself on me and Iget actually famous, please
cancel me as quickly as you canand as soon as you can when I
have nothing to lose.
I'm not emotionally attached tomy mansion yet.
When you get over yourself, youwill become much more aware of
(33:54):
other people's experience in anembodied way, in a sensitive,
empathetic way, but in a waythat you are aware of.
So it's not totallyoverwhelming like out-of-control
empathy for someone who clearlydoes not deserve it.
This is the kind of empathy youcan get good information from,
like.
You will start to noticepeople's body language and
(34:17):
energy and sartorial choices andother indicators of how their
life is going and what theirvalues are, etc.
Their self-image, how itcorrelates with their actual
station in life, etc.
Their self-image, how itcorrelates with their actual
station in life.
All that will becometransparently clear.
You'll notice it so hard youdon't notice that.
You notice it and maybe you'rethinking I don't want to get
(34:37):
over myself.
Or like okay, I'll kill my ego,emerson, but why don't you go
first?
I was like well, it was my ideayou go first.
That's how the system works,the system I created.
This is a revolution.
I'm staging a coup on yoursystem.
I don't think it's going to bebloodless.
You never asked me what I'minto.
(34:58):
You're going to find out.
It's going to be a long weekendIf you decide to hang on to
your ego.
You can still get a pretty goodread on people by paying
attention.
You can still get a pretty goodread on people by paying
attention.
You can intellectualize it.
You can look for the four orfive layers of meaning that are
in the modal joke.
People joke in different waysand all of them are delivery
(35:22):
systems for honesty that theyare afraid to express in earnest
.
That's what makes them goodjokes.
Funny to adults is thattragically unconscious
self-revelation that people doall the time because people are
leaky.
You can also hear it in theirmetaphors.
What language, what slang, whatargo, what pattern do they use
(35:46):
to describe how they see andinteract with the world?
What jargon do they leverage tointerface on a holistic,
ecological level?
Are they balls out or balls tothe wall?
People tell you what they'reinto.
Presentation matters.
If you don't exist,presentation is everything.
You can't afford to forget that, but most people do, and that
(36:11):
can tell you a lot about them.
You can figure people out, andthat comes with all sorts of
advantages.
But I'm going to tell you rightnow once you see this you can't
unsee it when you realize youhave the ability, capacity and
willingness to do it, and thenyou do it, that becomes an
obligation.
Be prepared.
(36:31):
Another jewel that I justdropped on you from my stash of
family jewels I may be anincreasingly eccentric,
born-again bachelor in paradisenow, a little rough around the
edges, a little rough around theedges.
A project, a nice guy on Indica, but at one time I was a Cub
(36:52):
Scout and I'm telling you,bitches, be ready, thank you.
(37:39):
How about this?
Pick a location, a liminalpoint, somewhere you normally
pass through without thinkingtoo much of it, because therein
lies opportunity, and block offsome time.
Give it an hour to sit there ina state of meditation, or
whatever else there is besidesmeditation a liminal state.
(38:03):
Be with that and ask yourselfwhat, what is this?
Allow yourself unfetteredobservation, set aside your
assumptions and your heuristicsand whatever you're looking for
and ask what is this?
Not rhetorically, but out ofcuriosity, and bring to that the
curiosity of a Sherlock Holmes.
You will not stop seeking andyou will not stop getting more
(38:26):
granular until you find perhapsat some point.
Zoom out and then you'll see it, or you'll do something else.
In this, right now, we areasking what is this?
And we are asking through oursenses and we are perceiving
through pictures, sounds andfeelings.
Not answers.
Not answers, but more questions, a network of questions, one
(38:50):
sprouting out of the other.
And of course, like allbeautiful things, this too must
be ruined, and as humans, we arethe ones to do it.
And you're going to ruin it inone of the coolest ways, which
is by making art, although youmust not try to be cool.
That is the enemy of greatnesswhen it comes to observation of
(39:13):
this sort in what some wouldcall creativity.
But we understand to beforgetting what you forgot, how
to do, and knowing that you canunknow because you unknew.
And here you are feeling it andyou're gonna ruin it by writing
about it, making a song, amural, whatever your preferred
(39:35):
avenue of expression is.
Puppetry is big as well.
Some of it is part of therobust fetish community.
Some of it is not even,arguably, porn, it is just pure
art, as much as art can be pure,purely impure puppetry.
(39:56):
If that's what you do, do,puppetry about what you are
feeling, experiencing, what youare, because you are the flow of
human experience and you'regoing to make a beautifully
imperfect record of a failure totranslate that experience.
(40:16):
You might be the first one whogets it right.
The fact that you are arrogantenough to try is an absolutely
magical thing, and you are abeautiful brat and you're going
to get the bruising that you areso obviously cruising for in a
bit, but you're going to makeart as an invitation to that,
(40:36):
which I will accept when thetime comes.
But for now, you're going towatch other people, namely
people with names that you don'tknow, that is, strangers, or
relatives who are strangersbecause you don't know that is
strangers, or relatives who arestrangers Because you don't
recognize them as relativesbecause they're too far out on
the family tree that sproutedout when it was allowed to
(40:59):
become what it was.
Maybe they know you.
Maybe the barista that youdon't have a crush on because
you're oblivious and you're notpaying attention, has a crush on
you and is telegraphing thatand is frustrated by your
obliviousness, but at the sametime, that makes you dumb enough
(41:20):
to be hot, which just inflamesthe passion of this person that
you don't know but is part ofyour world in some sense.
You're certainly part of theirs, and the part of you that is
part of their world is morepurchase in reality, one could
argue than the part of you thatonly lives in your head.
But let's get back to this,because this is all we get.
(41:43):
There's nothing after this.
The meek inherit nothing.
Do it to it like you always doabout this time, because the
time is now.
So observe, notice theassumptions that are coming up,
the ways in which you arestubborn, in which you fall back
on existing intellectualcapital and insist on fighting
(42:06):
the last battle and using theold metaphors that don't work
here.
Your current state of immersionis a platform for interrogation
, exploration, fornication withthis.
Whatever this is, we'll neverknow.
That's what makes it fun, andit's full of signs and symbols.
(42:28):
Life is but a dream.
It's also a dream, yes, andit's more than a dream.
It's about as good as it getsin terms of magic.
You are making up a lot of this.
You are arguing, flirting andperverting with versions of
(42:50):
yourself, and when you recognizethat you might get over it long
enough to have a really goodorgasm or at least get inspired
by one of these symbols, whatdoes?
it mean.
Who cares?
What is it about?
What is it saying or singing orsliding into your DMs about,
through interpretive dance Onthe low?
(43:13):
Though, let one of thosedetails inspire you, one of
those little synchronicities,coincidences, noises that are
songs, that are weeds that areflowers, let it happen.
Leave it up to what you used tothink of as chance Throw dice,
like Luke Reinhardt's novel theDice man, or a writing group
(43:34):
that I used to be part of inChicago called the
Soon-to-Be-Pretentious Writers,where we would hang out in the
library at Harold Washingtonwhich is a pretty bitchin'
library and we would grab booksoff the shelves.
Obviously there would besomething about it that hooked
us, but we wouldn't think aboutthat too much because we would
grab enough books to dip intoand put our finger on part of a
(43:59):
page and then write inspired bythat.
So it was kind of like improvprompts.
It was a collaboration with thecosmos and the chaos and it was
fun.
You can do that.
You can steal that idea, whichis an idea about stealing ideas.
That's how ideas are oftentransmitted.
(44:20):
Do that until it's done andthen close with gratitude.
If you want to, you can sayamen at the end of it.
I don't kink shame unlessyou're into that.
Say thank you for the question.
Know that you gotta go back andthere's no way to fully
integrate this, but that createsan opportunity to understand
(44:43):
the things that you've felt,which some people don't get a
chance to feel until rightbefore they die.
This is truly a luxury.
Now you are living in your city.
People ask Henry David Thoreauwhy he didn't travel the world.
He said I've traveledextensively in Concord, which
was his town.
Now you've done that where youare.
(45:03):
I hope it's a serious city, nota made-up city like Boston.
But you know, bloom whereyou're planted.
(45:48):
Towering talent, terrifyingtenacity, scarlet obscura, the
toast of la getting buttered up,smoking hot, distinctive,
pleasant smell.
Was she gonna get burned?
She was willing to continue herconquest.
Film, fashion and performanceart.
Rest with with the questions.
(46:09):
Los Angeles, where reality is adream, dreams become reality
and sometimes life can be awaking nightmare.
Or is that simply oneinterpretation?
Certain people thrive on thissort of ambiguity.
Despite its heavy-handedsymbolism, clunky cliches,
(46:29):
obvious and smarmy moral appeals, what is called the square-up
reel at the end, where all ofthe debauchery in the first two
acts is justified, made notpalatable but put in a context
that the normies can understand.
It's a place where lost soulsgo to find themselves and others
(46:52):
go to lose themselves.
When Scarlet first touched downat LAX, she was Amber
McCallaghan, an intense youngwoman from Nova Scotia, blessed
and cursed with a rich innerlife.
Despite her bashfulness, shewas cerebral, synesthetic, wild
and yet acutely specific sexualfantasies that drove her to a
(47:14):
certain kind of frothing notunpleasant insanity, made it
hard for her to play well withothers in the real world and
easy for her to make unforcederrors which, it was said, would
go on her permanent record.
She was bullied and takenadvantage of.
She found sex to be a wonderfulform of artistic expression.
(47:36):
Unfortunately, one of herpartners bragged to her friends,
gossiped to their friends andpretty soon people were putting
all kinds of labels on her andputting her in buckets Not in a
fun way.
There's nothing quite asdissatisfying as finding
yourself in conflict with peoplewho have already permanently
made up their minds abouteverything.
(47:57):
So she got out.
She went to Los Angeles.
She had struggles.
Her car broke down.
Her car got broken into, herhot plate got stolen.
Suddenly the car did not seemlike such a pleasant place to
live, and neither did LosAngeles.
Just as she was about to giveup, she ran into Maxwell Manman,
edgy avant-garde director thecritics call brutally
(48:20):
transgressive and calls his ownwork quote porn with ideas.
Unquote In the matter ofphilosopher Georges Bataille,
who communicated his anarchistideas through buckwild,
hallucinatory polemics of thesolar anus and works of smut
such as Story of the Eye.
Maxwell Banwin wanted to screwthe world in its mind.
(48:44):
His work included violence,vandalism, loitering, criminal
acts of provocation.
The truth of his work was thathe wanted to be God and he
wanted the work to be his finestcreation.
And it was just never as good inreality as it had been in his
imagination before, and thatmade him feel insecure, which
(49:05):
made him mad at being a cultleader, which is where some
people land when they try to beGod but don't quite get there.
He wasn't doing a great job ofthat too.
He didn't trust himself, and itshowed.
But he did that one thing thatScarlet Obscura liked, and she
did a few things that he liked,and even in a metropolitan area
(49:26):
of more than 12 million peoplethey just couldn't imagine
finding other partners who hadthe hookup for those things,
because they got it like that.
Most people don't get it,certainly not like that.
She conquered fashion bywearing a particular magical
shade of lime green, contrastingwith just the right hue of
(49:46):
silver.
Her films were reinvigoratingthe whole art form.
She released them throughproxies so as not to upset Maxl,
but even in disowning them,there's nothing she could do to
dampen the crackling heat oftheir brilliance.
One of the things that limitedher freedom to move was her
empathy with.
(50:06):
Maxl which came from having herown unresolved inner conflict.
We need ideas, good ones, rightnow.
(50:42):
The clock's ticking, anybody.
If you've got any ideas, I'lleven take bad ones.
Step up, you gotta have badideas to have good ideas.
I won't rag you down too hard.
Okay, no takers.
You got to get some ideastonight and I'm going to give
you a simple process for how todo that.
So listen up.
First of all, do your research.
(51:03):
Consult the experts, read thearticles, read the books, read
the scientific white papers,read the cranks, read the
unreliable sources, read thegarbage, know the whole spectrum
of opinions and decide whichones to disagree with, and know
what you're talking about.
When you do you don't have alot of time, so don't do too
(51:24):
much research.
Do all the research you canhandle.
It might not be that muchbecause you're an amateur.
I'm a professional.
I learn everything.
I do extreme amounts ofresearch.
I devour all of the materialthat I can gather about the
subject and then the rest of itcomes my way, because once I'm
charged up, I'm a magnet forinformation and I get thoroughly
(51:47):
immersed in a subject, to thepoint where there's no
distinction between me and thisidea, this body of knowledge.
The borders are porous.
I don't know where my life ends.
I've died five times and Idon't have to tell about it.
I don't know where I end andthe thing that I'm researching
begins.
It's almost like I've alwaysknown, it always will, and
(52:09):
there's no history, no beginning, no end.
I just know.
I just know, I always knew.
I just have to forget that Iforgot that I know and get out
of my own way.
And then you begin the processof working over that idea, that
material in your mind, beatingit up viciously, asking the
(52:30):
difficult questions,interrogating it.
What happened on June 7th?
Your story doesn't add up.
Ask the hard questions Make itembarrassing, but it'll respect
you if you are courageous enoughto get in there and be annoying
, and it'll respect you as apeer because it's used to being
(52:51):
treated with kid gloves and it'ssick of that.
It wants somebody it canrespect and that's you.
So you will become intimatefriends with your subject matter
and you can puzzle and ponder,have a conversation with this
material that you're researching.
It turns into an argument, thatturns into a fight, that turns
(53:11):
into a rant on your part and theidea is just sitting there and
taking it like a bitch becauseyou know what you're talking
about and you're giving it thebusiness right now.
You're speaking hard,uncomfortable truths that it
doesn't want to hear, that italready kind of knows, but it
needs to hear, it needs to learnwhat it already knows.
And then, when all the pretensehas been stripped away, you can
(53:36):
put on a mask and you can danceby the light of a bonfire, with
your subject matter, under thelight of the moon, and you can
also have one of those glowsticks that you wave around.
You can listen to techno musicor big beat music from the late
80s or early 90s, as you reallyget to know your idea, but then
(53:57):
that's it for a while.
You need a break.
Already.
This has gotten too intense tooquickly.
So you need to step away fromthe problem, from the issue that
you're dealing with, that youneed to get ideas about.
You need to forget all about it, forget it exists.
First, distract yourself, anddistract yourself until you're
(54:18):
so thoroughly distracted thatyou don't need to be distracted
anymore.
What you want to do is stayfocused because you're focused
on something other than thisthing that you're not thinking
about.
You have thoroughly forgottenabout it.
Indulge in whatever form of fun,gets you out of your head and
into your body and into theworld, be it base jumping, be it
(54:42):
the consumption of poisonousfish that can kill you in
high-end seafood restaurants.
But it doesn't, because thechef knows exactly what he's
doing.
He's one of the only people inthe world that can serve this
fish without murdering a bunchof people.
He used to have rivals, butthey're all imprisoned now for
(55:02):
negligent homicide.
And you can do psychedelicdrugs or do something with
permanent effects.
Psychedelic drugs make you tripfor a couple of hours, give
yourself brain damage, sniffglue, hit yourself in the head
with a hammer and you willtotally forget about your idea.
You will dumb it down, makeyourself an idiot and then you
(55:24):
can be receptive.
You can cultivate thebeginner's mind mindset and you
can just sit with that and allowit to be what it is, get in the
fluid flow of experience,because you're not overthinking
it anymore.
You're significantly underthinking it.
You've ruined your brain, butthat's good, because you used to
think you were smart.
(55:45):
Now you know that you knownothing.
You don't even know it.
You just kind of act on it.
It's one of your many unknown,knowns ideological assumptions
that form the framework of yourlife.
And you are now taking a break,you're resting, you're
breathing and you're waiting foryour idea to come in.
(56:09):
It may come in a flash ofinsight, a blinding white light,
life-changing epiphany.
All of a sudden, eureka, you'vegot it.
You have already changed theworld.
You just need to act on this.
You better act on it right now,because you're going to be
heartbroken if somebody elseacts on it first.
But first submit to the idea ina sexual way, masochistically.
(56:33):
Let it punk you out and makeyou its bitches.
Then you'll really know whatit's capable of, what your idea
desires.
You are merely a servantcreated for its pleasure.
You'll let that happen andyou'll like it.
You will love it, even becauseyou love your idea and you kind
of love this new feeling oflosing control, because you felt
(56:53):
like you had to be in controlfor so much of your life.
Now you don't have to worryabout it.
Now you're dumb and you'retaking it hard from this new
idea that just chose you.
It's you think it off.
It's like it was out there.
It was in the ether, floatingabout bouncing around, and then
you were just there.
You were there to receive, andnow you're really receiving.
(57:14):
You will now endear yourself tothe idea because, in a sense,
every masochist tops from thebottom.
Now it's time to take your ideaout on the town, put it in the
mix, make sure you get it outthere, make sure that you break
through the noise using all ofthe techniques, the persuasion
rhetoric, direct mail.
(57:34):
Marketing is a good place tolook for inspiration because
they always go right into it andbecause it's conversion.
They're serious about gettingpeople to take action.
If you're just talking, if it'sjust food for thought
chin-stroking think PC Beltway,elitist crap you're telling
people about their lives likethey don't already know.
(57:55):
But he's gonna listen.
Give them something to do.
People are waiting to be toldwhat to do.
Don't keep them waiting.
Let the idea evolve.
Be receptive to feedback, butdon't really care what other
people think.
You know this idea on anintimate basis.
You know what it wants.
You know its most perverse,perverted desires.
You are the shepherd for theidea.
(58:17):
But let it evolve.
He wants to.
Everything always changes.
The idea gets better and betterand pretty soon it changes the
world.
You might not talk for a while,but it will always live on in
your heart and vice versa.
K-chung, los Angeles.
(58:40):
Emerson Dameron's MedicatedMinutes LA's number one
avant-garde personal developmentprogram.
1630 AM.
Kchungradioorg First Wednesdaysof the month, after which it
becomes the only good podcast.
Bye, bye, outro Music.
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