TheGrouchCouch: Metalomnicon #1 | Shadowrun Anarchy - Love Death & Dice

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello one and all welcome to a brand new campaign right here on the grouch couch love death and dice

(00:05):
Metal Omnicon now of course this is a future fantasy
Campaign set in our very own homebrew world
We'll be using the system of Shadowrun anarchy, and I will be your humble game master Turk
But of course it's not just me. I'm here with the lads and say hello lads

(00:25):
Hello
Gonna introduce themselves from left to right and what character they're gonna be playing where you could find them on social media starting with
Proteus hello hello
I'm children of proteus found on all social medias under that name p-r-o-t-e-u-s
I make comic books about fish people and you can catch me here every Sunday on the grouch couch

(00:49):
I apparently am just infading the internet like a disease, but this season. I will be playing Anunka
the bass player of the band a
Air Genasi and
Just generally vibing kind of individual hello everybody. I'm Connor
You know me as Connor or

(01:10):
Psychostats your captain's dad this season. I'm gonna be playing Roger rage face rage face rage face
He is a goblin and he's the lead singer of the band and he's kind of an asshole
So bear with him hello everybody. I am Emmy from Emmys art stuff
You can find me on Instagram and twitch and I also am on forge of lore

(01:35):
Which is on twitch and YouTube and Instagram you can find me here on Sundays at the grouch couch
playing eon King
a vampire who is an
Indeterminate age and of course I am Turk you can find me at turkey dude or turkey terror pretty much everywhere
I'll be your lovely game master for this here

(01:58):
Game we're gonna be doing now up front
I want to say this is gonna be about 12 episodes just so you guys know how much you're getting into
If you're popping in brand new on YouTube or even Spotify or anywhere you get your podcast just know this is 12 episodes
each one of them runs about two to three hours long, so you know the story that you're about to
Invelice yourself into all right
But Shadowrun anarchy has two ways to play it one of the ways to play it is a fully narrative driven kind of game

(02:23):
Where everyone controls the game as you play which we have been inspired by this way of playing and we'll be doing a separate show
All about that, but this is still a normal kind of standard tabletop game. We're doing here. We're doing it the normal way
And here at the grouch couch
We do like to dress up in full costumes and do a lot of you know
We kind of consider it theater ish stuff live on Twitch, so if you are listening on YouTube or Spotify

(02:46):
Whatever you can catch us over there every Sunday, and yeah, it's pretty good stuff now. What the fuck is the grouch couch?
I'm gonna tell you
As I always do at the beginning of campaigns
We are a group in a collective of a bunch of fucking nerds that love making really really cool shit
And we are a group for everyone all right we appreciate and love everyone we appreciate creativity
And we think that we should push the bounds of what role-playing has to offer

(03:10):
People have called us the punk rock people of the tt RPG world or the adult swim of the tt RPG world
Thanks, Connor, and we love that shit. Well. We're gonna wear that as bad as forever
We're obviously not very child-friendly, but we do love a good old laugh every once in a while
So thank you so much for fucking joining us and being awesome all right and being here

(03:32):
I think that covers everything oh and one other thing before we do get into the show
We are doing a metal band campaign. We have released music for this metal band on Spotify that you can listen to
And this is basically the adventures that they get into when they're not you know playing music and doing things
It's kind of like this
Very cool meta thing that we're doing yeah, and you could pick up all metal Omnicon merch on our

(03:57):
Website and if you want to figure out anything else about us or even find a link to the music
It's all on our website the grouchcatch.com yes drop a like add a subscribe to us if you're watching on YouTube
And if you're on Spotify listening to this campaign leave us a review
Leave us a review homies also just like add all of our music to every single one of your playlists

(04:18):
You know we all know you got like 20 it fits on all of them
Add add all of the songs
Do it hell yes, and do absolutely give us a rating and review on Spotify and stuff because that helps us out a lot
All right, we're trying to beat the SEO system all right. We're making really cool shit, but you know is whatever all right?
So do the things thanks so much. Oh, cheers you guys. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you for fucking being here

(04:39):
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I'm very excited cheers you guys
I think without any other further a doha it's time for us to run our
Fucking intro for the very first time and introduce all of you lovely viewers out there who haven't seen them yet to cranium Carl
If you guys were here during session zero you've already seen this but for everyone else
We're gonna be playing this for the first time
So we're gonna run the intro we're gonna come back and we're gonna get into some fucking story you guys

(05:29):
Oh
What is up nerds it is your favorite fucking floating skull
Do you hear I'm dead but I'm still fucking here and I'm floating around to talk to you about shit everybody here
Did they call me cranium Carl?
Dude, I have literally no idea, but you can call me whatever you want you can call me dead
You can call me daddy

(05:51):
You can even call me daddy if you know what I'm talking about no dude
But I'm so fucking excited to be here because these guys have graced me with the honor dude
No, the fucking privilege my guy to be covering one of the greatest metal bands of all time
Metal on Nikon I am so excited to be covering these guys because their music blows me away
Dude the cool ass shit that these fucking hooligans get into oh my god

(06:14):
I'm gonna be doing the recaps the ads will either fucking push it if you my friends have any questions for me
Cranium Carl make sure to submit them in the discord
You know use the hashtag cranium Carl whatever the fuck you want and remember keep an eye out for curses also cars
Potholes poisoned food anything else like that that could kill you because one day you are gonna die
And we all have that in common and one day you might end up like me cranium Carl and that my friends

(06:37):
It's fucking metal is so I'll see you later
First of all thank you so much Carl appreciate that a member of the night. Thanks Carl now
first
Some exposition some epilogue about our world. Oh, I would like everyone to to close your eyes and envision this with me together

(07:01):
All right
the camera fades into a sweeping aerial shot of fell spire a city where
Skyscrapers touch the clouds and hover trains zip through the air and the screen pulses with neon lights and magical glows as a dragon soars overhead
Welcome to Grimory where the ancient magic of fairy tales and the cutting-edge technology of the future collide in this sprawling

(07:24):
Metropolis of fell spire the extraordinary and the mundane coexist in a delicate but often dangerous balance
Our camera cuts to a bustling city street at night where magical beings and humans walk side by side a
fairy flutters past a cyber cafe a
Werewolf in a security uniform patrols the area and an elf in a sleek business suit checks their enchanted smartphone

(07:47):
From the towering skyscrapers of the supreme 10 to the shadowy alleys of downtown
Every corner of fell spire tells a story the supreme 10 are the powerful conglomerate of mega corporations
They hold the world in their grasp their decisions shaping the world for their own gain
Our camera cuts to a secretive boardroom high high above the city where 10 shadowy figures sit around a table

(08:12):
Holographic displays projecting charts and arcane symbols
You see once a year these 10 titans of industry gathered together to decide the fate of our world driven by ambition
Greed and recently the mysterious green essence of magic that flows through all of the awakened
Our camera cuts to a scene in a dark alleyway

(08:33):
A small horned girl a demon darling extracts a growing glowing green liquid from a human
A dark towering succubus watches over them
You see magic is a powerful and coveted resource that can be harvested traded and consumed it grants
Unimaginable power to those who wield it, but it also brings peril and corruption

(08:57):
Our camera lastly cuts to the fell spire skyline at dawn
The city is bathed in a mix of natural and magical light
The camera zooms out to show the four city hubs of our world each ruled by a different faction city hall
Downtown the university and the arts district
You see in this city of endless possibilities and hidden dangers heroes and villains are made every single day

(09:22):
but
Now we cut to where our story begins a shady
gas station as we pull up to the old rundown gas station on the outskirts of fell spire
The flickering neon sign barely illuminates the cracked asphalt and faded paint a solitary gas pump stands next to a grimy rain-streaked window

(09:43):
The scent of gasoline mingles with the damp air adding to the sense of unease that permeates this place
We can see an old
Converted bus with its hood open and a rotting zombie with green hair under the hood banging away at the engine while smoking a cigarette
Sitting just outside of the bus on her knees
Meditating is a beautiful genasi with blue skin and sunglasses on

(10:08):
To signify that maybe she's blind but then we cut to the inside of the gas station as a vampire
Stares at the snacks on the shelf with a glazed look over her eyes as if trying to remember what all these things taste like
Then we hear a scream
And we cut to the gas station's outside bathroom
The light flickers as we see a goblin's face behind the barrel of a gun pointed directly at a man that is strapped to a chair

(10:33):
The man in the chair screams out no, please please no
I'll give it to you, man
Roger
Would you like to describe what your character looks like for the listeners and then tell us what do you do? Well, i'm a i'm a goblin

(10:58):
Dressed in mostly black
Uh
I i've been known to be called beautiful too just saying
People refer to me as beautiful all the time
but anyways, um
Yeah, I got my spike studded jacket and uh

(11:19):
you know
Big fucking gun move your mic a little bit closer. Oh, is that better? Can you hear me now?
Yeah, it's way better bud. Thank you
All right
You hold your gun up at this man. What do you do? What do you say? Listen motherfucker?
I want the bathroom key give it to me

(11:42):
Okay, look man the bathroom key
I don't want to give it to you because
last time
You you never gave it back, man
Uh safety's coming off. Um, I right away really wanted to make a roll
Um tonight, that's why i've introduced this and I would like to make an intimidation roll

(12:02):
Um, will you roll me a charisma with small arms check there connor?
I mean roger now for everybody just listening in
Um, the main way this system works is me as a dungeon master
I will be rolling a pool of dice and the amount of successes that I get that's what our players have to beat
So for this first one, I only got one success and connor got two

(12:28):
I mean roger got two successes meaning you succeed. All right, man
I hid it away. I hid away the key
In my unmentionable place
And you can get it from there or you're gonna have to untie me and i'll get it from there, man
Oh, no, you're staying tied
And I I just knocked the chair over by pushing on his chest with my foot and he falls to the ground

(12:53):
He's still like tied to the chair, but he's on the ground
And then I want to uh go up to the side of the chair and blow off the bottom of it with my gun
One okay. Now you're gonna make a small arms check against a chair. That's what you're gonna do. Um, do not kill this man be one

(13:16):
Five successes. All right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, you blow the bottom of the chair off with your gun when he's like, oh man
What the fuck dude? Oh, yeah
Uh, we're getting in this um, sodomy only three minutes into the episode cutting his pants open
Reaching out there roll me so we're gonna do

(13:39):
So light a hand to find it. So you're gonna roll me an agility agility check here
To find it. I was gonna say what do you roll for that?
Oh, let me um
See the difficulty here. That's a one you got three successes. So you succeed
Um, you stick your hand up there now along with the bathroom key you pull it out

(14:03):
Yeah, and it's covered and you know, it smells now
You pull it out and on a key ring. There's also a usb drive on this key ring and you remember
Whenever you pull it out and see the usb drive. Oh, yeah
I was supposed to be getting the drive from this man. Not only the bathroom key what luck
Oh cool
Uh, it's like a rsb

(14:26):
Whatever
Whatever. I need to take a shit
You have the key now in your possession
Do you untie him when you get him outside or just leave him in the parking lot? Oh, no
I uh took him into the bathroom with
Okay, nice. Nice. Hell. Yeah, he's in there with you. You're doing your business. He's on the ground and he's like

(14:47):
Oh, it's fucking smells. Oh
Oh gods
Oh, shut up
I can't do it when you talk
Only when you watch oh that's fucking funny boobies
I didn't flush or wash hands now

(15:08):
Our camera cuts back over
To our vampire friend in the gas station perusing the snacks
Yes, eon, would you like to explain what your character looks like for people who might just only be listening? Yes eon
is a
average height vampire female who is
White as balls

(15:29):
She is. Um, she has her hair dyed red on top and black underneath
It's a shoulder length hair and she wears a black and red lacy vest with a cover over her shoulders
um, and she is holding in her hands a um
Completely black lace umbrella which she uses in the sun to keep from

(15:55):
Crisping too much. It's more inconvenient than anything. Um, but yeah
All right
As you're perusing these snacks
Looking at them
a
very large orc
Comes in the door you hear it chingalingaling and you look up

(16:15):
And it looks to be a familiar orc to you
It's one of your neighbors
You know him to be jeff jefferson
And uh, he walks in he sees you he nods and he peruses on over. Oh
Hello eon
It's good to see you here. Jeff

(16:35):
How are you? Oh, it's so good to see you. Oh, i'm doing so well. How are you doing?
Well, I came here to get some more chamomile tea
I see you perusing the snacks here. I um
Do have in a thermos with me. I have some chamomile blood tea if you're interested

(16:57):
You know, that's my favorite jeff. Oh my god. I'll take some yes if you're if you're offering of course
Of course anything for you
And he pulls out a little cup and he pulls this thermos out of his his he's wearing like this lumberjack
Kind of like outfit like big fluffy flannel and he pulls this thermos out
And he just pours you a little cup of it and he hands it to you and he asks you he goes so

(17:19):
How's this? How's your metal band going? How's it you fitting in? Well?
Oh, I fit in pretty much anywhere I go
Honestly, all you have to do is be nice to people and you know when you're in a metal band
Just chew on some necks and spray blood into the crap other than that. It's great
Hmm

(17:40):
You're handling that well. Oh, yeah. I mean the blood's not my favorite
But you know, it's it's necessary to live
That's why I always carry some with me
Well, i'm off to work at the lumber plant. I uh come here in the mornings. I I hope that your day goes well
Remember to keep that blood thirst at bay. Thank you so much

(18:01):
Thank you so much jeff and i'll hand him the cup back or the flask
Thank you
And he screws it back on the top and he grabs all different kinds of snacks that one orcish lumberjack might grab
Um all different kinds of things chat at this point if you want to name off some snacks that might be in this world
In this gas station, please use the suggest thing

(18:23):
But he grabs all different kinds of stuff and he goes up to the counter and he's standing there
Waiting because it seems that the attendant is missing
Who knows where that person might be?
The camera can cut back to the attendant in the bathroom with his face pressed against the dirty tile and a large
Uh three inches from it

(18:46):
Disgusting
Very good. Look when you're playing a goblin you got to give goblin opportunities to your goblin players
You know what i'm saying? Now
Now camel toes. I love that. I don't know why but I love that
Very well steve. Um, so yeah, he grabbed some butternuts
Some dick cheese sour gummy worms ted troll jerky and camel toes

(19:11):
Um and dehydrated mousse balls and nuts very good as he uh rings everything up eventually
You walk out with him and as you guys do you see ananka
And i'm on her knees out by the van
now ananka as you're sitting outside
meditating
your
Physical body is here in the parking lot of the gas station

(19:33):
But your spiritual body is flying across the city and you're flying
Soaring over looking at all the people all the magic everything that's happening
You're kind of getting a sense for the things around you. You're scouting ahead as you usually do
Uh before missions. Well, I imagine that we're coming just from a gig
You know i'm looking ahead to our path that would lead us to where we're gonna park the van for the evening or the day

(19:58):
I should say
Where we're gonna park the van
And see if the path is clear in any roadblocks
up ahead
Uh, because we don't exactly have a conspicuous ride enjoying the feeling of the astral air
brushing
Through my skin and through my my body. Hell. Yeah. Okay, um very quickly

(20:22):
We're gonna have you make a roll as well
Um, I would like you to make me a willpower logic roll while you're flying through the astral here
And it's not gonna be an easy one
Maybe it is. All right
Beat a one
Uh, that's a three now chat. I do want to tell you guys your first roll of the season and it was a success

(20:49):
Proteus this is exciting. It will be the only it will be the only one
It's very exciting uh now chat I know when we roll dice because of the system
There's just d6s that just fly across the screen and you guys are like what the fuck's happening
So down here next to the bit jar is actually a little box that'll tell you how many successes we get whenever we roll
So on this occasion Ananka rolled willpower logic. She rolled seven dice. She got three successes very exciting

(21:15):
Okay
Here's what's gonna happen now Ananka on your success is your you're flying through the air as you do
There's a vision that
Blocks your vision and you're stuck in the air and it's like everything just goes blurry
And as your eyes start to focus there is a spiritual animal

(21:37):
standing in front of you
I would like you to tell me what kind of animal this is or thing or whatever
Um, I imagine since you know, I am connected to the air it would be a raven

(21:57):
A big black bird. I love that
That's dope, okay
The big black raven stops you in your tracks
You have a vision of this animal and it speaks in a deep voice. It doesn't really seem like it fits the raven itself
But when it speaks to you, it says Ananka

(22:19):
You've been chosen
To be the representative of the raven
If you are worthy
Then without even giving you an opportunity to respond the raven grows twice its size
It opens its mouth and swallows you
And as it does you awaken on your knees in the parking lot

(22:42):
I gotta stop eating that weird cheese and our dirty throat
That was very good, I love that you'll get a couch coin for that yes, I love that response um
Now for everybody in chat speaking of couch coins, but they do have something included in their game called plot points and instead of us

(23:02):
Introducing a new currency into our world. We're just going to be using couch coins now for couch coins
These guys actually printed myself a cheat sheet. Um, is I'm a good dungeon master
Um plot points are used to add twists to these games couch coins
So you use that twist these games and they could all also be used to change order and other kinds of stuff like that

(23:23):
There's a list of things that they can do by spinning these
Couch coins, um, and they can also give themselves bonus dice on initiative rolls and other kinds of stuff like that
And as you can see there Ananka is holding an actual physical
Couch coin poker chip, which is very cool. Roger you slam out of the bathroom in the back

(23:44):
Open up the door. There's just a stench. We see the flickering light
And the man just standing there and as we zoom in not standing laying there on the ground and as we zoom in on him
He's still tied to the chair. His face is just covered in shit
But he's wearing the uniform for the gas station and he has a little name tag
That has a name on it and I want everyone in chat to throw out a suggestion for what this gas attendance name is going to be

(24:08):
Banner word be aware of that. So underscore pubert just redeemed banner word blood fuck
I love that. God damn it
I love that
Okay, um because you just did all this damage to this man roger
I'm gonna let you pick a name from these list of names what this gas attendance

(24:29):
Name is gonna be on his name tag
Dave
Fuck Dave
Dave
Fucking Deldo
His name tag says Dave
now
You come out of the gas station
With your friend as Jeff gets in his old pickup truck fires it up and drives away
He nods to you roger you come out of the bathroom smelling real bad and you wake up from your meditation all together

(24:54):
Just as it sounds like your zombie drummer bob zombie
Has hit something on the engine and brought it back to life and it roars to life and
fires back
And he slams the hood shut and as he slams the hood shut
We can all see that the zombie's head isn't actually on the body
He slams the hood shut with the head still under the hood and then the body starts running around like oh no

(25:19):
Oh, no, and he's like god damn it
Body you did this again, and he's like running around
But as this is happening
I want to go popcorn style and have each one of you guys describe what this converted bus van looks like
To everyone from the outside
All right, and we're gonna start with Kate just to give you a little bit of a
Clip of the van and what it looks like and what it looks like from the outside

(25:42):
And we're gonna start with Kate just add a couple of elements to it. Maybe what it has going on
For us to get a visual so first off. It's called the magic ghoul bus
It is a converted yellow school bus that we have painted painted black a big
Common area when you first walk in and the back towards the back is where our individual bunks and areas are

(26:05):
Mural me cute off, you know shirtless obvious
Standing triumphantly on the top of a mountain lightning strikes background. So it's pretty cool
I guess also on the inside that it is
decorated in tons of flowers lots of purple lilacs and

(26:28):
Calla lilies and she has little tiny tiny like mini canvas paintings of flowers that she has just
Put magnets on and placed all over the bus and on the front of the bus
There is a giant curling mustache proteus take note
now

(26:50):
Sorry our resident artists around here everybody first of all
Shout out to children of proteus for all the amazing art they've done already so far at this campaign
They even drew cranium Carl if you guys didn't know that
Yeah, it's good stuff. It's good stuff. So shout out to children of proteus for their amazing art cool
Also, the the a on shirt is now available a young shirt is now

(27:11):
If you guys are waiting for the a on shirt, it is now in the merch store. You can now collect all three
It's pretty sick before we move anyway further. I actually forgot I was shuffling them mindlessly
Jeff Jefferson turns back around and hands you something out of the window
It's an item that was gifted to you from frog. Thanks frog

(27:32):
Thank you frog
Now these random item cards I have here actually from Shadowrun 5th edition so the stats on them don't work
But for roleplay reasons and for other reasons we'll figure out the stats ourselves
But we love these because we get art and visual and other he gives you a
tactical model 73 fatal light pulse right there
light pulse rifle

(27:57):
Hey
Figured you might need this
Hands it out the window
You're on my Amazon list aren't you I added you to that right
That's he's like yeah, it's it's a sentimental gift thanks for the idea Creon he's like yeah
This gun was it was my friend's gun and you know, I don't do much fighting and maybe you might need it. Oh

(28:26):
My god, that's so special. I just got to keep it away from Roger, but you know, thank you
How do you guys help
Bob zombie get his head stuck unstuck from underneath the hood
I mean, there's a lever that you can just flick up. Hold on
Do not shoot the bus no no no I

(28:48):
Don't know what's going on
But I see I see Bob's body with his fingers under the hood trying to find that latch
Although I don't know his fingers there and there and I hop up and I sit on the trunk and I go what's up Bob
And it traps fingers under the hood
Under the hood you hear his his voice. He's like

(29:10):
Bitch
Okay, fuck the lever roll me a strength strength check, yeah, beat a one

(29:32):
Oh my god, yeah, your character is very strong very strong
Yeah, you said it opens up and you see Bob's face
He's still got a cigarette in his mouth, but it's like broken and he's like, oh shit. Thanks, man. That was
You know Wow and the body walks over and picks the head up and sets it back on his head on this day

(29:55):
You three know that you're not only here to kind of get some gas
Because this is one of the only gas stations left that has unleaded gas
That's why you guys find yourself here as often as you do here in the outskirts of town
Because in our world is a lot of hovering cars that just use electricity and other kinds of stuff
So you have gassed up your car and got it fixed to your van got it running Bob did he's not really a mechanic

(30:18):
But he just knows this bus so well because you guys he's been driving it for so long
You guys know that you're here today to meet up with Mr.
Johnson now, Mr. Johnson is the
Man that kind of helps your guys as band
He kind of serves as a band manager because he helps you guys get shows

(30:38):
He helps you get more merch helps you promote the show on social medias and in VR and other kinds of place like that
And he kind of helps manage you guys by giving you things that you need and kind of keeping you guys together
But he does this in exchange
for your service you see Bob works for a
Company that helps people now this company helps people in good ways

(31:03):
And it also helps people in bad ways
I know i've already explained this a couple times but for people who've just started in episode one
Mr. Johnson's company also does things to help people in bad ways and he doesn't want that to lead back to his company
So he likes to hire up third-party people like you guys to do the dirty work for him and he does that in a good way
Like you guys to do the dirty work for him and in exchange he does what he does

(31:25):
So you guys know that you're here waiting to meet up with Mr. Johnson. So before Mr. Johnson arrives
When he pulls up, where do we see you guys here at the gas station? Well as uh, Jeff drives away
um aeon or aeon is gonna walk up with some snacks in her arms and she's gonna be like
Um, Ananka since rogers out of that weird cheese

(31:46):
I picked up some of those pickled camel toes that you really like and roger I know you're super into the mustard soda
And she's gonna start handing out these snacks the the clerk wasn't in there
So I just took everything and and you know, it's probably fine right like it's this is fine. Yeah, sure
All right, enjoy that mustard soda there buddy

(32:08):
Oh, thank well, you know every so often when we stop for snacks you stop for something that you used to like when you were
Human. Oh you have you described the flavor?
Hmm
That's a really good point
I I don't like to think about those things because it was such a different time of my life
But yeah, sure. I liked bananas bananas were really good

(32:29):
Hmm. Should I go back in and get some bananas? Do you think they'll have bananas at this gas station? What should we do?
I don't know
Oh, I mean I do like bananas, but I really can go for like a corn dog, you know
Or maybe just a regular hot dog any sausages in there

(32:51):
Uh, no, no sausages, but they definitely have some corn dogs on that like thing that rotates and just keeps them warm
Yeah, just a fuck ton of tornadoes cyclones. I think they're called
All the high
Want to get glazed up
Yeah, I want to get glizzies
Yeah

(33:12):
All the best foods are you know long and shaped I prefer a taco myself
Um, you go inside
um, of course and uh
roger when you go in you just grab hot dogs off of the spinny thing and the attendance just like dave
Yeah, dave's working the register. He sees you though and he's like take whatever you want man. Just oh, so yeah
I reach in my pocket

(33:34):
And I I pull out
What seems to be used toilet paper? I said here you go. I think this is yours. Oh jeez, man. Just
Just come on, man
I'm working them here, dude. Hey, hey
Like nothing's wrong

(33:55):
Yeah, I picture you guys uh have like lawn chairs out in the shade underneath the bus afterwards and you guys are sitting there getting
glazed up
Um, and as you do a really nice
Futuristic car floats in it's like completely black. The windows are tinted like completely black
He's got a very specific part to his engine

(34:16):
Mm-hmm
Most of the cars in this world are actually made by tesla
Tesla is a company that is one of the supreme ten and his car is a tesla car as he pulls in the car
Comes to a stop and he turns it off and it
Settles on the ground and he steps out of the car

(34:37):
And I actually have this I found this it's not what I was envisioning
But we also have these awesome NPC cards from Shadowrun to help us whenever you're talking to people
And so our boy, Mr. Johnson looks like that
He's got four years he's wearing a very nice suit
Is he an elf or is he a vampire?

(34:59):
He is an elf I wanted him to be a drow, but in this picture he has lighter skin
But he is supposed to be a drow
so
He gets out the car. He eyeballs you guys before he even walks over he lights a cigar
blows smoke looks around everywhere and then approaches and you can hear the clatter of his very fancy

(35:23):
shoes as he walks over stands in front of you guys is the three of you are sitting in chairs
enjoying phallic shaped foods
He looks down and he goes
I really wanted to do I really want to do a little Nikki voice for this guy, so I'm gonna do it anyway
Hello metal omnicon

(35:48):
Hi
Hi hi
Right where I left you here's my first question
Did you receive the USB drive?
Oh shoot oh yeah, I got it. I think oh

(36:11):
Is that the thing that smells like a prison bullet yeah covered in turds, but here you go
Yeah, could you please wipe it for me?
Fucking disgusting as always larger and he takes it and he puts it in a little baggie puts it in his pocket

(36:38):
He's like okay
job one well done and
Weirdly enough to start off this campaign each one of you guys are gonna get one karma for completing this job a
Job you didn't even know you were on that's right now karma in this system is what these guys used to level up their characters
And we'll be doing a little bit of that during our breakdowns or we'll do recaps of it whenever we return each episode alright

(37:01):
So stay tuned for that each one you guys get one karma for completing this quest
now
Mr.. Johnson
Puts it in his pocket and hits a cigar a couple of times and Ananka
You know that Mr.. Johnson still kind of owes you guys a little bit of cash from a job you did a

(37:22):
Couple times ago. He didn't pay you out fully he promised you
You know some new guitar strings and equipment stuff like that
He still hasn't paid you out fully so when you look at him
You're not looking because you're blind whenever you're in his presence. You do have a you know a little bit of resentment
Towards him because he still owes you

(37:42):
so as he continues talking
You have that feeling but
he says
Well metal on the con I have a new job for you, and I think
this will be
Perfect for your three set of skills
Are you ready for a new job? I?

(38:03):
Guess we just got done with this one
We have a gig coming up in a few days
Yeah overworking us can't you see how?
Destitute we are oh, it's not that bad you guys are just being sour
You don't even care about it when's the last time you got me a present asshole

(38:27):
I'm just saying I could you my my strings are getting a bit warped
Warped yeah, that's what guitar strings do
So work, that's all you think about you ever take time off of being a robot

(38:51):
First of all mule hello. Thank you for lurking and P words lurking as well to do the thingies
I just say the photo is a negative of the real deal nice
That's a very good point there sort of viable
He okay you say that to him and he goes
Yeah, well I
Do still owe you how about this you guys?

(39:14):
Do this job, and you don't fuck it up this time and maybe I'll provide you guys with strings and stuff before your next
gig here in three days
What says you?
Maybe
Maybe provide us you still owe us those that was payment for like two weeks ago

(39:37):
You're in debt to us
Okay, I will also promise maybe a
Company retreat soon all right Roger. I'll get you a cake. Oh, when's your birthday Roger?
I don't fucking know
Parents died asshole. Thanks for bringing it up Jesus. You're such a robot. I hate you

(40:01):
If I had a room to go to I'd go and slam my door
Also, he doesn't really care for cake. He's more of a cheese kind of person
specifically the cheese logs
What about cheesecake?
But also you know
Look at him ice
Packing on a few pounds. Do you think it really needs cake?

(40:23):
Are you one of those people that would just like have a pizza party to smooth over things at the company picnic?
Instead of giving people actual raises. It's the principle
This guy this guy just when I buy pizzas the way that I show appreciation for my team I
Bet you have a real high turnover

(40:47):
well
Anyways, let's talk about my company and more about the job
Out of curiosity what kind of job well a rubbery
Oh

(41:08):
Robbery that's fucking metal. Let's do it. Oh, yeah
Of course. Yeah, I would hope you'd be a little bit more skinny Roger for a robbery
You are putting on a couple pounds as Ananka said
This this is just water weight. Leave me alone
You're fat

(41:32):
All right, so
Here's the job. I
Need job music
No, I feel like you know in like oceans 11 and make him sound
The job make him sound more like a robot put on job music

(41:55):
The
There you go, what is this this does he use Google?
Find the music Google music
Okay
Yes
Here's the job
You three are gonna go meet up with a woman a magic user by the name of Mira

(42:17):
Mira has something very
Well magical sentimental that she needs from a jewelry shop
After you
Pick up Mira you're gonna go to the jewelry shop get her inside and by all means
Just make sure she gets what she needs and don't fucking get caught

(42:39):
If all that goes well
I'll give you your damn guitar strings and
Each of you will get eight karma
Oh now we're talking
Now we're talking all right i'm talking no alarms

(43:00):
All right, and make good grabbing the jewelry
Do we know what the jewelry is do we have any mira knows she knows what she wants
Yes, whatever else you do with the rest of it, I don't fucking care

(43:23):
It sounds kind of fun guys
Do you show yourself a deal
Nice Tyler that's thirsty bad put on job music. Hell. Yeah, dude

(43:45):
Okay, sounds like a deal but at our next show there better be new strings for me and eon
New new fucking cord for fucking rogers mike and
And fucking bob needs new new drumsticks those old bitter be lined up and sparkling

(44:05):
And a cheesecake in the green room along with four groupies that actually want to fuck me
Well, they don't make those if I can just get your groupies. I can hire your prostitutes roger
If that's what you're looking for none of them want to
Bullshit you get me bad groupies
Even maybe you can get a marriage

(44:29):
What
even
The prostitutes don't even want to fuck you
No
What they just take the money and leave as soon as they see me. That's bullshit
We should sue them for false advertisement
Yes, sue prostitutes for false advertisement roger that'll do it good. Yes

(44:52):
I
Can't you believe them? I'm telling you got a case
We've got a case
Yeah
Okay
Shit, I can't believe him he hands you a card
That uh says mira on it looks like mira's business cards got a phone number on it and he uh

(45:14):
Hits a cigar a couple more times and he goes
Get on it
Call me when you're done and i'll talk to you soon. No braille. How inclusive
Are you blind or something?
Yeah, oh

(45:38):
Noted
And he stomps out you're just figuring that out now you don't care about us you asshole
Oh
I told you we're just numbers to him in his big corporate system. I keep telling you break free men
She is
Buh lie

(45:59):
She brushed her teeth with a lobster this morning
Why do you have lobster in your bathroom is the good question but secondly
You're yelling this at him as he's pulling away in the car and he's just nodding
He rolls up his hair
Roger uses the lobster tail as a dental dam

(46:22):
How does that work okay, you don't want to know that's action
All right, um
You guys gear up in the van. Um, and you have the phone number, you know where to head next now
If we cut back to you guys as each one of you are entering into the van into the bus yes

(46:44):
What do you guys do? Um, we're gonna start with eon this time start from the right side
What do you do as you enter into the bus?
and uh, yeah, how do you gonna
She's gonna place her various snacks on the kind of community table
So everybody can kind of grab and growl and then she's gonna go to her her little spot
Um in her chair that's covered in a flowery afghan and she's gonna sit down crisscross applesauce and she's gonna start crocheting

(47:14):
Nice I love that roger
I would have plopped myself down on my my junkyard couch that I dragged into the bus that everybody else hates but uh
you know, um
and uh
I don't know. I'm just gonna

(47:35):
Kind of lay there
Sexily
Uh anonka
Uh, i'm going to go back to where my bunk is
Towards the back. I it's it's got nice little curtains over top of it and i'm gonna go
One of my tarot cards and i'm just gonna start shuffling and kind of looking

(47:58):
to
see what
the
Our mission holds see if I can get glean any information from a card pool
Bad at see an awful lot. You should
Make me a dice roll on that
You absolutely should
Yeah, do you have anything special you would like to use for this role?

(48:22):
Let's see not arise
Oh
Fuck off your shit mouth goblin
Such a rascal roger. Yeah, whatever
There's a particular waft coming off of your couch. I hope you guys have disguises for the robbery

(48:44):
Uh, probably willpower
Power yeah, I know willpower. Uh conjuring conjuring plus willpower. That's what it was. Hell. Yeah, let's do it
This is going to be an average average roll
You see
What did I get? I got a three and you got a zero. Oh goodness bad roll

(49:08):
You have failed. I told you
I told you it would only be the one roll. I told you
I know right one roll I get would um, I had one job. There's been like four dice rolls already. I
There's a system here. I'm all grisly. We're all cause need one
Hell, yeah, thank you
Um, there's a system here in shadow run anarchy called a glitch die

(49:29):
It's in shadow run me is the dungeon master for our game
I will be rolling the glitch die this whole time if the die comes up a one a five or a six a glitch will happen
One is bad five or six is good
All right. Um, so every time a dice roll happens if I see it's pertinent and it needs it
I'm gonna roll it now these guys can actually spend couch coins to roll additional glitch dies if they want to risk it for double

(49:51):
the effect
Yes
All right reroll it anonka
Beat three six
Yes
Beat three successes. Come on. You can do it. I believe in you
Oh, I'll leave somebody juice. That's a four. Oh
Hell yeah, four is a success badass. We need some some uh

(50:20):
Some of this
Um
Can you describe for me for I tell you like the outcome
Maybe some cards you pull when you're sitting at your little table pulling cards
Because you i'm sure you can explain it better than I can yeah

(50:42):
I can
Hell, yeah, you're actually gonna do it. That's fucking cool. And um
Metal. Yeah, I love that. I think that deserves another couch coin
So I pull the three of pentacles
The knight of swords
And the high priestess

(51:06):
Uh this is a foretelling
Of something that is going to require skill and precision
Set to us by a
Unfailing
And
Somewhat they they put logic above feeling set to us by someone who and is

(51:33):
Our guiding light will be someone
Female in origin which makes sense for mira and who has an uncanny ability to
To make things go her way
There there I will also say um you glean from these cards that

(52:00):
A powerful spiritual connection awaits you in the jewelry store
That also makes sense for the high priestess, oh, yeah
Okay
Bob the zombie sitting in the driver's seat turns around in the seat and looks at you three and he goes

(52:22):
Hey guys, so like where are we headed? What's going on? What do we do?
We're gonna do a robbery oh shit man, that's cool
Yeah, do we have the address
It was on the card
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh number I say you pull out the card. It's got a phone number on it. Who wants to make the phone call?

(52:53):
I'll do it. All right pull out your um
Phone device here now the way that I picture phones in our world as small
Slender pieces of metal
That you just like flick and then a screen comes out of them. So you just flick it and then a screen comes out

(53:14):
It's like a holographic screen that you can like then type on and then you just you flick it back and you could hold the metal
Piece to your ear, right? So you flick your phone open you enter the phone number and you call
And the phone rings she does so very slowly and carefully adjusting her glasses
Because

(53:34):
Because you're all this new technology like what is this shit?
I love that. We'll give you a couch coin for that. That's very good. That's very good
um
phone rings
Do do do do do and then a voice on the other end answers and you can hear in the background
What sounds like the clinging of cups and like the sound of a coffee machine going off?

(54:01):
and right away the voice is like
Hello, please who is this?
Hello, please this is this is um, um, my name is eon
Yes, eon, how can I help you?
Um, I forget why i'm calling
Oh, would you like to hang up and call me back?

(54:23):
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, i'm looking for um mira
I'm looking for um mira I think I still have a thing hold on
Might be loud. This is mira
Oh, hi mira

(54:45):
Hello
Yes. Hello. Hey. Hi, we are um, just calling because we were coming to see you
Okay
Why are you coming to see me?
Um, I I um, uh because of jewelry and a job
And yeah, it's gonna be a good time. Oh

(55:08):
Mr. Johnson sent you
Yes, that would be correct
This is need to know
And I need you to arrive here quickly
I am at the public
cyber cafe
I'm in public
because

(55:29):
I believe
the supreme 10
Have been following me
my
Magic was made public
And I believe they're trying to get it from me
I've seen
in the alleyways
lurking
Waiting for an opportunity demon darlings and their awful succubi

(55:53):
They will
Not take my magic from me. I believe
That jewelry store holds what I need to be safe. So
Come to the cyber cafe here in downtown
We'll talk more
Okay, so we'll come to the cyber cafe and you have a lovely rest of the day until we see you again

(56:14):
And then it'll be even better
You are very chipper
Yeah
Sorry
That's okay
That's refreshing. I'll see you soon
All right. Thank you. Love you. Bye
Bye

(56:38):
Love you, babe
There we go, is it off
Yes, really still doing cool. I know that voice is pretty cool
It's like it's like super crunchy on the ears. Um, so I don't use it all the time. But yeah, that was fun. Okay
You guys have the information
All right, so we're going to a cyber cafe guys, are you ready?

(57:02):
I guess
This we're robbing this place, right?
No, no, not the cafe. You don't we're going to a jewelry store after
Oh
Okay, we're gonna go pick up mira. She thinks she's being followed which is never good
I don't think sometimes it is
You get followed on like, you know social media sometimes you get followed if you're a great speaker like me

(57:31):
Oh the social media, yeah, bob no, that's not what she meant
Yo roger, man
You are a good speaker man. That's exactly what I know you for man. Your speech is dude. Yeah, man
Yeah, and I totally you know, I I have a speech right now it's it's about um,

(57:53):
No, can we get going please? Okay. Yeah
He tries. Yeah, we should
and pay no attention
Me the car a couple times and the bus really doesn't want to get going
but then eventually it starts back up again and backfires and
He pulls it up
Out of the parking lot real slow like

(58:14):
You guys sit back down and stare out the windows as you're
Looking out at the beautiful city of fell spire
And he gets on the highway and you guys are puttering along as hover cars are just
Zooming past you and bob is usually
a very calm kind of hippie guy, but

(58:35):
Bob zombie has the worst road rage. So the whole time you guys are driving. He's like
Yeah, man, everything's cool. Get a fucking lane dickhole
Yeah, man. No, everything's great. Don't fucking hit me
All right. Sounds good man
Like that

(58:56):
I love bob
Yeah
We're gonna have to pick him up some neck tape because that thing just keeps he's having troubles
Maybe he just lays it on the dash off the time
Yeah, but when he's trying to fix stuff his head keeps falling into things like buckets and and engines and stuff

(59:21):
Poor guy, is that not a good look?
Well
Practically speaking. It's just troublesome. I think
Can I um
Interject one thing. Um, I know I don't have a couch coin or plot point to interject
Can we pretend like I have one to spend it?

(59:42):
only as an example, but also because I want to say we cut to the back of the bus
And roger has gotten up from his couch and has opened the window
Of the bus and has sticking his gray goblin butt out the window at passing cars
Eat my ass

(01:00:07):
Cool tell your mom to eat my ass
Mom tell you it's wafting outside the window, you know, at least it's not wafting into the bus
It's just true. It sounds like somebody's clapping very

(01:00:30):
That's what my ass sounds
That's pretty good
Now bob pulls off the freeway and drives through the city. Um, it's very dense very smoggy city here
Um in the downtown area and eventually he pulls up to a cyber cafe that has these beautiful signs all over the front of it
They're just neon glowing all over the city. Um, like all across the street

(01:00:53):
I mean and it just says your very best cyber cafe
Um, and you guys pull up out front and you park now whenever you do
Park as you guys are pulling in you're looking around the area maybe for what mira had
Mentioned I would like each one of you guys to roll me a perception check, which is
is logic willpower

(01:01:19):
Oh, it's a three for me on it's pretty good
You guys have to beat four god damn I got three sixes and a five damn it
Jesus. Okay. It's up to you. Ananka
Come on Ananka all three of you guys fail that's that's
That's sad I got a four at least one of us has an excuse on four d6. That's true. That's very true

(01:01:47):
Um
Reroll for emmy would have been smart to me dm steve underscore forge of low used reroll emmy would have been smart. Oh god
I'm sure this will be really bad. Awesome. Okay three again. Yeah, that's three
No, I had three before
All right, it's fair. Uh, yeah

(01:02:08):
I got four successes on 46. That's not great
Okay, you guys pull the bus to a park here in the middle of the street
And I will say it takes a while for bob to find parking in this cramped ass city, especially for a big ass bus
It's tough, but the experienced driver he is he does find a place
Um, yeah, what do you guys do?

(01:02:28):
I'm gonna grab my cane. Hmm. Uh, so I can walk on my own
And guide myself towards the cafe
nice
Okay, is anyone going with her or shall I explain it as if yeah, no definitely going with her. Okay

(01:02:52):
Yeah, cool although I was I was ready I was ready to explain smells and sounds only I was ready
I feel like that's going to be a common theme here in this here campaign. So
You guys walk out of the bus around the corner and you reach the cafe you step inside and inside the cafe
There are a bunch of gnomes working together. This is a gnome owned cyber cafe

(01:03:16):
They're all on top of the counters flipping levers making all different kinds of coffee and drinks
They're jumping around there's little step stools everywhere that they're hopping up on to get to places and do stuff
There's a long line that runs around the place of people buying different kinds of pastries and other kinds of stuff like
Dick cheese pastries, which is apparently a thing now episode one. Jesus christ chat

(01:03:37):
And then you spot her over in the corner it is a elven woman with blue hair
Oh, she's very pretty anonka very pretty
And you can tell that it's her because she's sitting very nervously staring out the window
Weird way to say thank you

(01:03:59):
Thanks slappy appreciate you
All right
What do
All right, I mean we should go talk to her right because she looks really nervous and I think she could use a smile roger
Can you make her smile? Yeah? Yeah, I know how to talk to me

(01:04:20):
Uh, i'm gonna i'm gonna run up to her are you nervous?
You shouldn't be that nervous. We're here to help you
Roamy charisma here. I always like to play this game
Really calms me down
And i'm gonna start doing the knife game on the table with my fingers

(01:04:42):
Jesus christ, that probably
This was all right. I'm sorry. I'm actually
agility for charisma sleight of hand
And this is going to be a difficult role a hard role, but I only got four successes so b to four

(01:05:08):
One yeah, you run over you scare her she goes
Uh, oh and then you just start stabbing your hand blood's all squirting out and you're like do you like this?
You're just stabbing the shit out of your hand on the table
Uh in the interim of that I I would like to guide myself by
uh roger screaming wells of deep shattery and uh

(01:05:33):
Approach and be like oh mira
Uh, it's been a such a long time love. I haven't seen you since we were at school. Mr. Johnson
She gives uh, oh that's that's very clever at first
She doesn't trust you and then you see mr. Johnson you see her eyes perk up at you. She goes. Oh
you're with

(01:05:54):
This gentleman
Oh, whiff is a very strong word loose
Uh
Okay
She reaches out and grabs the tip of your pinky finger and hands it back to you roger and then she says
Okay, please um sit sit, please

(01:06:17):
Oh
Oh roger put it away
The blood oh the blood okay. Mm-hmm. We can put that away
Okay
When things calm she says thank you for meeting with me. Uh, mr. Johnson is a good guy. They help a lot of people it's um
It's very it's very thankful what they do for a lot of us lower class people, you know

(01:06:41):
Just trying to make it day by day and sometimes
Things we need done aren't
Um with the law I would say so it's very nice that you guys agreed to meet with me
Okay
Now I believe i'm being hunted like I said before my magic was revealed
um, I was in a situation where I had to use it in public and now I think the supreme ten are trying to track me down to

(01:07:05):
extract my
magic for you know
For I don't know years and years they've been hunting down even massacring complete
communes of people who are magic users
and um, although I know it
Do you do you understand?
Well, yes magic, you know

(01:07:26):
Will
Yeah, sure magic. Whatever fucking interrupt someone. Yeah, I've shared a lot. Would you care to elaborate?
Uh, well, I mean first of all fuck the government because you know, I was one of those communes
uh
You yourself?
You yourself? But you know slip through the facts. Yeah slip through the cracks because I was deemed defective on account of the

(01:07:55):
Annie C. Sunglasses. Oh, are you blind?
Yeah, you know cane
Oh, yes the cane. The purely white eyes tend to put people off. So I wear the sunglasses to
At least look a little bit more friendly
Hmm
That's fair. Don't underestimate her though. She's amazing

(01:08:20):
so anyways
Um, I care to point out the window here
And she points into the alleyway out the window that she's sitting right at
And the three of you look
Out the alleyway and you can see on the other end of it. There's like a neon light that seems to be
like
Patrooting a shadowy figure standing there holding the hand of what looks to be a little girl

(01:08:46):
next to him
And she's holding this huge needle
And she's like
Yeah, so
They've been following me
And I need to go underground
Um, I'm worried that even whenever I leave here
They might follow us out
So before we head to this jewelry store, do you know a way to get rid of a tail or?

(01:09:10):
Anything like that
You have a tail you need to get rid of I know how to do that
Roger for the love of god
Oh dear
For the love of the gods, please kindly fuck off. Uh
Okay
Uh

(01:09:33):
Everyone just listening. No, he turned around. I I I keep going
Keep keep going a little farther. I still hear your chair scratching. You're still too close
I think that's all he's got. All right, that's good. He's at a different table

(01:09:57):
Then he waddled away for fuck's sake all right now now for some peace, uh
Could
I have an idea
So aeon if you could escort our friend to the boss

(01:10:18):
Um, I have an idea with you know
my own
jacquenary
You know not so subtle things of my nature
uh
I could fog out
The uh the alleyway
While we leave

(01:10:41):
Because you know air
Manipulation I love that
Mm-hmm. She goes. Yeah, that's a that's a really good idea. Actually. I think that
That might work as she says that roger you're at a different table by yourself and
A little gnome comes up to the table

(01:11:02):
And uh, he's wearing like this green apron
He's like
I'm gonna plug my nose though
Uh, what can I do for you today, sir?
um
An americana
And oh
Okay, so um, I uh actually uh this uh, this was already ordered for you. Uh, the man that just left

(01:11:27):
He ordered this for you
And he slides a cup on the table
And on the cup, you know how they put like names, right?
On the place where the cup is there seems to be some kind of weird
message
It looks like
Some kind of like a weird coded message and like numbers and other kinds of stuff like that

(01:11:50):
But it looks familiar to you
And I know this isn't your strong suit but to understand what this might say
I want you to roll me a willpower logic roll or even
Logic logic for me
Do logic yeah, okay

(01:12:12):
She's got to be the one
Yeah, zero failures you've got no idea
Oh
Thank you for reminding me
That's a six what makes it a glitch die
The first one baby
Hey
Um
Okay

(01:12:34):
Uh, that means something awesome is gonna happen instead as you stare
At this cup
Um, yeah, first of all, congrats to glitch. Cheers everybody. That's basically a critical hit. That's what that means
That's that's a credit. That's a nat 20, baby
So if y'all got nat 20s put them in chat. Thank you. Slappy. Slappy's on top of it. Thank you, buddy. Cheers
Ah exciting

(01:12:54):
Um
As you touch it
The weird symbols and numbers on the cup
Clo and then reform into a message
And it says
I've risen the ranks
I've made it to the top
I'm trying to get at the supreme 10

(01:13:18):
There's a little heart toki
Oh
Oh
This is for someone named toki
This is mine
And I pour it out on the ground
What are you being serious
Are you
I mean I read the message

(01:13:40):
But it's not my coffee. I can't take it
It wouldn't be right
I mean
I'm not gonna
I can't take it. It wouldn't be right
Fair. Okay. Fair
I'm a very fair and just
person
I haven't noticed
Okay
Now as he's pouring this coffee on the ground

(01:14:04):
We cut back to you guys at the table
And Mira says I'm ready
Whenever you are
Okay, is there like an exit?
Like a back exit?
Should we find a back exit?
Should we just walk out the front?
What do you think?
Perception
Alright
Beat a one

(01:14:28):
That's a three
And a glitch die
Oh no
That's a one on the glitch die
We got a six and then we got a one
That's awful
You do see a back exit
But the back exit is not
Unintentionally locked
DM Steve underscore forge of
Low use real glitch

(01:14:50):
I guess. Why not Steve?
It's a two which means that's fine
You see a back door
Oh
Do you think we should take that exit
Ananka?
Can we give a couch coin
To Roger for on a laptop at a cafe
Right now?

(01:15:14):
Writing down lyrics
Hard being a vocalist
Um, okay
I'm gonna stand up
And hold my hand out
And be like come along
Alright she
Alright let me
Let me go out the front

(01:15:36):
Okay
I would say let me go out the front
And I with Roger
Come on
Ah
Wait are we trying to like create a distraction
Or something?
Kinda I'm gonna
Fog out the vision of the people
That are following Mira
Oh okay

(01:15:58):
They're across the street right?
Up the alley yeah
Huh
Is there any cars driving by?
Sure
But I think
Do uh
Ananka do you wanna let Roger do something before you do your thing?
I mean
Roger's a good backup plan
For when my shit gets fucked up

(01:16:20):
Hmm
Okay
Right
Like I said I get one good roll for the whole season
One
That's it
What to
Do we have any plans here? Chaotic wind
Ooh that could be very cool
Yeah that was
World oh god

(01:16:42):
Sorry you do your thing
Chaotic world
Yeah yeah no chaotic world
The effect is it creates a mass hallucination
Slash distraction
Targets must re-roll one successful die
Per roll
Uh so
Essentially
That will also let me use it like
Fog cloud I think that's cool

(01:17:04):
And I can roll them a perception
Is what I can also do I think it's very cool
Yeah
Alright
I don't know how to use
That like how do I roll for it?
One success
Cause I can't I can't even click on it
It like
Click the name
Misillusionation perspire

(01:17:26):
Right you're gonna do conjuring
Plus willpower um and you're using this
Effect
So conjuring willpower
And it's under skills
And it's already on willpower cause it's conjuration
Willpower so it already does that
That's right
You know I had to beat a three
It's like whenever you roll
For fucks sake

(01:17:48):
Unclick your glitch die
Cause that's what that was
The last roll was your glitch die
Unclick that cause I'm the one rolling it yeah
You hear the squeaky from the other room
As Corgi boy
But you got two successes
Actually right above that you can see the successes you got
And I'm gonna roll
Which is a five
Which is good it's not a critical success

(01:18:10):
But it is a little bit of a boost right
Did you make it a five
Or did you roll it
I rolled it did it look like I made it a five
I rolled it
I rolled it off my head yeah
Yeah the background
Ambience from the corgis
He's in the other room too that fucking squeakers
Just loud we spoil them corgis
Impressive

(01:18:32):
Listen corgis are partial to
Squeakers they love their
Squeaky nonsense
Yes they do
The boy in here had to take
Him away when we stream
Okay
We're gonna use this one again
You
Step out in the street with Roger

(01:18:54):
Roger your eyeball in the cars
You look down the alleyway to the left
And you see these
Figures standing there and they're coming up
The alleyway
And you begin to cast
Your magic up the
Alleyway and what does it look like as you're casting
I literally
Just move my

(01:19:16):
Wrist in kind of a cyclone
Like motion
And I whisper the conjuration
Become dense
Become air become dense
And that lifts
A dense super fog
Nice

(01:19:38):
Like the whole
Alleyway and you know you just see
Neon lights like shining through it
And you can kind of see the shadowy
Figures still in the alleyway
And as that happens
It's like super dense
And it even with your glitched eye whips up
Like papers and trash and other
Kinds of stuff and makes it a little bit more
Dense and thick and hard to walk through

(01:20:00):
And as that happens you see the back
Door open in the alleyway
With Eon
And Mira
And they start running up the alleyway
Now these guys are gonna roll a perception
First I'm gonna do their skill
Check
They only gotta beat a one
But because of your spell they get to
Have to reroll successes right

(01:20:24):
So they also got a one
They have to reroll
So they have to reroll one successful dice
So that six has to be rerolled
And it's a one
Yeah
Which means they fail their perception
You can see them struggling in the alley
And you guys run out and you all
Pile into the bus
Together

(01:20:46):
And Bob starts it up
And he goes
Oh hey man who's this cute lady
This is Mira
Go to the robbery place
That's on its card
Gotcha
And he grabs the card
And he looks at it and it's a card for the cybercafe
And he's like

(01:21:08):
Whatever, he throws it and he starts up the engine
And he takes off down the street
And you guys can see the smoke
Coming out of the alley
As you're driving away
You look out the back window and you can see
Emerging the short little
Red skinned girl
With this huge green needle and little horns
And this towering dark
Bloody succubus

(01:21:32):
And you make it up the street
Do you want me to shoot that little girl?
Cause I can
Cause I can
Roger
I have the shot
Just tell me when
Losing the shot
And she's too far away
You took too long
And she's too far away

(01:21:54):
You took too long
Let me know when you need something
How far away is this fucking place
How far away is this fucking place
I was like well man
We could probably get there
In a couple minutes man

(01:22:16):
I'm just doing my best
You want me to slam you on the ear?
We need to prepare for a robbery
As you guys just listened
Roger is now
Doing a fucked up ski man
God damn it

(01:22:40):
He said I hope you guys have a disguise
And I knew he was working on something
This whole time
I see him down there doing something
Is that a thong?
No it would be better if it was though
Oh shit that's funny
That was not a thong
It's my robbery
I don't know who you are
That was wrong

(01:23:02):
This is my favorite bit
Where the shit did Roger go?
It's slapping
I don't know
I'm right here
I'm just an angry rob
Okay
Here is
The bit that we're
Going to introduce next

(01:23:24):
We're going to introduce the setup
For this robbery
As you guys approach this jewelry store
It is late at night
There's a low fog on the ground
The neon lights are flickering everywhere
As you approach this jewelry store
It's located in a small little like outside
Like outlet
There are alleyways that run all along
These little buildings

(01:23:46):
And this jewelry store stands alone
And it's not only a jewelry store
But on the top of it it's basically like a
Pawn shop that also has jewelry
In it
There are gates on the front doors
As well as windows and stuff like that
But for the setup for this job
You guys are going to do
We're going to go into narrative roleplay mode
You guys ready for this?

(01:24:08):
We're going to test it out
We're going to do some Shadowrun anarchy stuff
The way this works is you guys get to explain a little bit about what's happening in the scene
And then you get to make a dice roll
To see how well it goes
And then we'll narrate and explain what happens after that
Okay
And for this to begin
Since I know all of you are very strong characters
I do want to roll initiative for it
Alright?

(01:24:30):
So everybody can roll me agility
To see who goes first
In this narrative role here
And I'm just going to put on
Some background metal music for this
That's a 5 for Neon
That's a 2
For Anonka
And a 4 for Roger

(01:24:52):
So Eon is first
The bus pulls up
What do?
Okay
I think Roger's on to something
I think he's got the right idea
Great execution by the way
I mean just absolutely lovely
And I think I've got an idea for myself

(01:25:14):
They'll never know
And then she's going to take a flower
And put one in Anonka's hair
And one in Mira's hair
And I'm going to try to do
Some sort of like
Stealthy disguise thing
I have no idea what kind of roll
Yes, Anonka
Yes
Nice

(01:25:36):
Stealth will be logic agility
If you want to do us a stealth
So as you guys are just listening
Eon put a little flower clip in her hair
It's a 4
Actually let me roll your target
Which is 1
So you succeed by 3 marks
So everyone adorns
Disguises
And all you guys step out of the bus

(01:25:58):
Together
Now just completely adorned with
Disguises and Mira's like
This is a great idea
I love this, this is good
Thanks
Yeah whatever, buckle up buttercup
We're here to take people's shit
Roger's next, Roger what do
Oh god

(01:26:20):
We're at the front of the building?
Yeah
Okay, I'm just going to walk up
And shoot the fucking doorknob
Well
Remember here in narrative initiative
You've got to get to explain what happens
And what's going on around you and everything
Oh, okay, in that case
I casually walk
Up after getting off the bus

(01:26:42):
Twirl my gun above my head
And then I shoot the fucking doorknob
Okay, alright
Well that's a fucking gif
Yeah, that was pretty good
Someone clip that for me please
Can we get some clip that emotes and drop
Please, because yeah that'll be
Fucking sick
Okay
You're just going to shoot the lock off the door

(01:27:04):
I'm cool with that, but first you've got to roll me a small arms
Attack against this lock here
And you only got to be the one
Ooh
It's a five
Five, Jesus Christ
Glitch die
Thank you for the reminder, that's a one
Oh fuck yeah

(01:27:26):
It's not good
It's not good
So you shoot the lock off the door
Right
And the bullet goes right through the chain
Sir, Underscore Puvet used reroll one
Fine
Wait, I'm waiting

(01:27:54):
What are we waiting for
I was waiting for Puvet
Alright, I'm moving on
The reroll
Why did you help him
Oh my god, I rerolled it
It's still a one, hell yeah
Wait, do I get to narrate
How this goes wrong
Or are you

(01:28:16):
We're in narrative mode
So if you want to embrace it, let's go
Wait, so it goes wrong
And I don't complete the task
Or it goes wrong
There's a complication
Okay, here's what I want to happen
I go to put my
Pistol on the lock
But it slips at the last second
And I shoot myself in the foot

(01:28:38):
And I go, oh fuck, and I headbutt the door
The door just swings open
Nice dude
The chain just falls off and the doors just swing open
I love that
Okay
You guys are the best robbers of all time
What do you do?

(01:29:00):
So in this chaos
I am essentially going to
Once again
Summon my fog
So it will block any
Sensors and cameras
This one
I think it's supposed to be a mental effect
But I will still take it, because I think that's cool

(01:29:22):
Well I figured with the
Thing is that there's the conjuration
But like as a Genosse
It's
I do have power, like an air Genosse
I do have power over air
Yeah, I'll give it to you just because of the way you said
Genosse, I love that
Wait, wait
This is actually a really good opportunity
For lore

(01:29:44):
What if the security system is
AI, but the AI
Is actual like
Rhone laboratory brain
Actually
I have an idea for the AI, but I also love that
I love that a lot
So yeah, her mental
Works
Real people

(01:30:06):
Real people, okay
Ananka, explain what do
Alright, so once again
I'm going to say
Become dense
Become air, and I'm going to
Essentially raise a big
Fog once again that will
Whisp around, and it will
Be more, instead of a
Mass fog this time

(01:30:28):
Blocking everybody, it will
Kind of just wisp around and find like
Cameras and sensors
And just like block
Their view
Cool, I think that's cool
Let's see you roll, let's do it

(01:30:50):
That's a two, oh I'm supposed to roll here
The glitch die still went off when you're in
For some reason
I turned it off
You only had to beat a zero, so that's cool
Here we go, excellent
Nice
Alright, you wisp up everything
Do you want to explain a little bit?
Um

(01:31:12):
No
No, okay
You wisp up the
Denseness of the air
Imagine you like storm
Like your eyes like light up as if
It gets all thick and it, from the outside
You push it into
The jewelry store as the
Doors swing open and it just
Oh and outside, cause there's always

(01:31:34):
Cameras on the outside as well
Absolutely
And as you're walking past the door
You look up, you see there's a camera there
And there's just super like condensation
All over the lens of the camera
I'm shortening them out
Yeah, yeah
It's pretty good
Okay
Now for my go

(01:31:56):
You three step into the jewelry store
And right away
Mira begins looking for
This magical necklace that
She's looking for, and as you guys step inside
There aren't only just like jewelry
And stuff in here, there's like things you would find in a pawn shop
Like old guitars
Amps, other kinds of weird
Other shit, and yes there are
A couple few cameras, old school

(01:32:18):
Cameras up on the walls
That don't seem to be functioning because of Anonka's spell
And you guys all begin
Looking around
Now, one of the things I want to point out
Is Mira is looking around everywhere
I want all of you guys to roll me a perception roll
If you would please
Which is
Logic willpower

(01:32:42):
It's a five, well darn
It all in dice
So you guys had to beat a four
Eon you got a
Five, Roger got a zero
Anonka got a two
So Eon you walk inside
And you guys are all looking around
And yes there's all this crap, like old tape recorders

(01:33:04):
Televisions, other kinds of weird shit
But you walk towards the back
While you're walking kind of with Mira
Mira is looking over the jewelry
And you look up, and in the center of the jewelry
Area there's like this statue
And the statue
Has it's hands extended
It's like a stone, like marble
Statue, and it has it's hands
Extended, and in the center of it's hands

(01:33:26):
Is this like
Magical looking necklace
That has a raven on it
Ooooo
That's very pretty
Anonka you like ravens right?
I'm partial to birds yes
I found this necklace
It's got a raven on it

(01:33:48):
It's gorgeous
Let me
Let me, let me feel it
Let me, let me see
Oh is this going to be one of those things
Where we need to replace it with something that
Weighs the exact same, I don't know
Just
Guide my hand to where it is
Okay, okay, I'll
Help her reach out

(01:34:10):
Nice, you reach out
And you grab it, you pick it up from the statue
Umm
You pick it up from the
Statue, the statue cracks
Uh oh
And the stone and marble
Falls away from the statue
Pfffff
And this huge
Spirit

(01:34:32):
Of air emerges
As all of the marble falls to the ground
Pfffff
Everyone
Roll me initiative
Let's go, agility agility
Initiative
Ooh
Ah
Eee
Let me know when we rolled

(01:34:54):
Hi Mira
BM Turkey, Band Manager Turkey
That's me baby
Thank you for the, the, being an awesome, good there
Mod there Steve, appreciate that
Mmm
Okay, so we've got a
Four, a three, and a three
Now we do a thing around here
Called combo initiative
And it looks like Eon

(01:35:16):
And Roger got the same initiative role
Which means they get to go at the same time
And if they want to figure out a way to
Combine their attacks to do extra effects
They absolutely can, and I'll give them
Extra damage for doing so
Alright, now this is also our first
Combat in this game
And it works in a really fun way
So as we're playing I'm gonna explain the way damage
Works and stuff like that

(01:35:38):
So, strap the fuck in, cause it's gonna be
Good, first I must roll for enemy
As well
Enemy also got a three
So they'll go last
Go ahead
The statue came to life, is that what you said?
Yes, it turned into a fucking
Uh, spirit
Of air
Stands in front of you

(01:36:02):
Yes
Alright
So, we're starting with you then Ananka
And uh, let me get us some
Music here
For our battle, what do you do?
I mean since it's a spirit of
Air
Like, I, I
I immediately feel

(01:36:24):
Almost attuned
To it
And
I feel like
My first thought process
Would be just to greet it
Nice
Free action to talk, what do you say?
Like, just
Just
Hello fellow wanderer of

(01:36:46):
Of the Aether
And, and
That which brings life to
Lone
That's fun, um, I'm actually gonna make you
Roll a charisma check, charisma, charisma
Alright
Alright
We do need an album command

(01:37:08):
I can do that Steve, I can do that
Baby mama
Turkey, thanks Vishi
I'll be your baby mama
Um
I got six successes
You only had to beat a three
On a six
Well charisma's my highest start
Oh it is
It says

(01:37:30):
Fellow
Wanderer
Of Air
Trying
To take
What is not theirs
I was guided to it
If it is
Rightfully yours I shall return it

(01:37:52):
If you were guided
Then we must
Fight for new ownership
As you so command I shall
Respect
May the winds be in your
Favor
And it whips its hands around

(01:38:16):
Beautiful
So I imagine with the charisma roll
That was my turn, correct?
No, no, no, free action to talk
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yes
Uh, well in that case
Uh, let me see
I'm gonna use my elemental
Attack

(01:38:38):
Uh, which is
Specifically electricity
Uh
Ooh
Yeah
Cause it's essentially just putting
Air ions together to crackle
Nice
It's very cool
Let's roll it, so when you attack

(01:39:00):
You will be attacking against
Um, the enemy's defense, alright?
Now some spells specifically say
What the defense is, but it is
Also usually agility logic
It's usually what you're attacking against
But your spell might say something different
It'll say like defense and then it'll have two little letters
It says defense strength plus willpower
Strength willpower, so that's what it is

(01:39:24):
Is that also what I'm rolling?
Uh, no
Your attack
So you're doing your
Elemental attack
It's a shadow amp
It is, elemental attack
Is it sorcery plus willpower?
Yeah, I think so

(01:39:46):
It'd be sorcery plus willpower
It's the same as conjuring willpower
Great
So you'll roll that and I roll
Strength wisdom
In this case
That is a
Oh, it's strength willpower, that's what I'm tripping
Anyways, it's 10d6 in that case

(01:40:14):
Alright, so I got a five
You only got a four
Your glitch die is a five
Which means if you would have succeeded
There would have been a little bit of a bonus to it
Would you like to spend an edge
To turn your fours into successes?
I didn't see what your dice were, but you can do that

(01:40:40):
Yeah, I'll hit the use edge button
There you go
Which made it a
Four again
Oh no, it just re-rolled it
Okay cool
Game master of hard
Hold on, I'm confused
Difficulty of hard, 10d6 is five
Nice

(01:41:02):
So
You only got a four, which means you fail
Yeah, sad
So I imagine
The lightning does come out
But it kind of
Because I cannae see
I'm kind of just going from where I feel
In the air, and since it is an air spirit
It's a bit more

(01:41:24):
You know, I can manipulate the air
So the lightning shocks kind of just
Crackle around it
Like it still succeeds, but it just like kind of
It misses
It does happen, but it misses entirely
And probably hits something on a wall
Alright
So
With your glitch die on the five
Can I say that it hits something on the wall

(01:41:46):
And it activates like a bunch of arcade
Machines that start playing like
Epic Queen music for some reason
Like in Shaun of the Dead
While you guys are fighting in this pawn shop
And so you guys are a little bit inspired
On your glitch die
Cool, now we're moving over to
Roger and Eon combo
Initiative, do you guys want to talk about what you want to do?
Eon, I need you to distract the beast

(01:42:08):
I have a plan
Okay
Alright, I got an idea too
And she'll take out her umbrella
Which is strapped to her back
And she's going to aim at the elemental
I know you can't see it very well
And she's going to go like this
And fan out her umbrella and send out a grenade
At it
Throwing a grenade

(01:42:30):
To the air elemental
Alrighty, let's get it
I'm trying to distract him
I'd like to ask a question while we're doing all this
Okay
This is a pawn shop, right?
Yes
So there's a bunch of old electronics
Laying around, right?
Yes
Alright, well

(01:42:52):
I'm going to be gathering certain electronics
While she's doing all that
Okay
Alright
Yeah, roll to hit
Let's go
This will probably be
Agility logic
On the defense roll here
Five, you got a beat
Oh, good lord

(01:43:14):
That's a three
Would you like to use your edge
Or even a plot point
To a couch coin
To give yourself an extra d6?
Alright
In the background she goes, shoot it again

(01:43:36):
Alright, re-rolling
Come on
Son of a bitch
There were a lot of fours in there though
So if you use one of your edges
Basically an edge makes four successes
As well
Oh, I didn't see how many fours I had
I feel like it was
No, it's okay

(01:43:58):
Alright
So
You can also use couch coins to
Take two movement actions
To heal a point
Of physical or stun damage
To have a spirit or device
Malfunction
To take a hit for a homie

(01:44:20):
Or immediately take one free action
Against an NPC who just attacked you
Oh, shit
Just so you know
Okay
I think I'm okay with failing on this one
Oh, god
Okay
Roger
We cut to you Roger, as this grenade launches

(01:44:42):
And just goes straight through this air elemental
And then another one
And both of them just go out
They like clashing through grass
And glass and shit
And then they explode and then you see Bob
Poke his head out the bus and he goes, hey man
What the fuck
Okay, so I don't want to tell you what the electronics are yet

(01:45:04):
Because it's a surprise
But can we like roll on
How many I have
Because it will potentially increase the effectiveness of it
If you want to, sure
Rin Silver
This is Shadow Realm, playing Shadow Realm Anarchy my friend
Welcome in
Okay, so
Also I'm like trying to haphazardly

(01:45:26):
Combine all these things in one
Alright
Like shit I'm finding in the trap
Do you have a skill in mind? Do you want to roll first?
Or do you want to do like a
Like a specific skill on your sheet?
Eh
I don't have that
Specific skill
No, I don't have a skill

(01:45:48):
For it
I'm just like creating something
Very haphazardly
Creating? Let's do logic
Strength
Because you're
Probably slamming some shit together
Yeah
Hi-yah

(01:46:10):
Oh that looks pretty good, you got three successes
I got zero, so you succeed
With your three successes
Thank God
That's a two, nothing happens
Will I get to use it this round?
Or is that my action?
You can use it this round, I'm cool with that
Oh, okay
Well
As all this is going on, grenades are flying

(01:46:32):
Through the air, fucking
All this shit out in the back
Gathering all these machines
Duct taping them together into one
One single opening
And then
All at once
I turn on
All these vacuums that I've combined
Into one tube
Bro, it's so funny Mira said

(01:46:54):
Vacuum in chat as soon as you fucking said
Vacuum bro
Holy shit dude
It's a bunch of fucking vacuums that I found
In a shop
And I taped all their tubes together
Into one tube
Oh my God
Okay, and how are you using this?
I'm just
Gonna try and suck up the

(01:47:16):
The wind spirit in it
That sucks
So like the
Funnest thing about fantasy modern is
Yeah, if you encounter an air elemental in a pond shop
You could totally put together some
Vacuums to fucking
Holy shit, you know what I mean?
The theme of Ghostbusters starts playing
Ghostbusters and shit, Luigi Mansion

(01:47:38):
On this shit, yeah Mira, okay
We're using a random item
To kind of put this thing together
I really just want you to make me a check
I want you to do me
Hand eye coordination, we're talking
Agility, strength
Is what we're talking
And this is gonna be a really hard roll
Because it's a whole ass elemental

(01:48:00):
You get a fucking
I only got a one
Great
I got a four
This is the thing
In this campaign is you're rolling
Against Connor
You're rolling against Connor and Connor has
Luck with the digital dice
That's just how it works, you're gonna
You're gonna fail every time you go

(01:48:22):
Against Connor, it's just the
Way of things
I'm not mad
You pick someone to reroll their dice
Random item
Yeah
So while you pick either me
Or Roger to reroll

(01:48:44):
Wren Silver, I'm gonna go
Ahead and draw this item for Anonka
Also hi Isaiah
Thank you Viva
That's Isaiah, cheers Bod
Who need it most? Right now the Game Master
Needs it most because he failed
Against me, but if you want me
To succeed and pick up this Wind Spirit
With Symbaccy, you can
Choose me too

(01:49:06):
Do you want the Wind Spirit
To win or do you want
The player character to win?
That's
Jesus Christ
The conundrum
Anonka, on a shelf
What are we giving the blind person?
Shotgun
Mosberg
C-1-A-T

(01:49:28):
Shotgun
Mira says
It's dangerous to go alone
Take this
And she throws you a fucking shotgun
Yes
What have we said about
Giving the blind person lethal weapons?
Save it up for the players
I don't know what that means

(01:49:50):
Reroll, Connor
Okay
That was a strength and agility
Right?
There we go
Three
How many vacuums are you using?
Three
I wanted to roll on it
But we never

(01:50:12):
You succeeded on your first one
So roll me a D8
A D8
Yeah we'll do
A D8
Seven
Seven vacuums
Fuck off
Okay
So what this vacuum is going to do
Is seven stun damage

(01:50:34):
On the air elemental
It pulls it back
But it isn't armor
Avoidance, so it actually pulls pieces
Of the air elemental off of it
Like some of the marble that's still stuck on it
So you take out all of its armor
And then it takes one
Stun damage
And it looks at you
And it's like

(01:50:56):
Clever
Goblin clever
I don't speak your language
So here let me try
And I fart at it
That's funny dude
Holy shit
It eyeballs
It eyeballs right down at you Ananka
And it uses its elemental attack

(01:51:18):
It's a cold attack
It blows cold wind at you
Alright
It is
It is defense of strength wisdom
Gage
We don't have wisdom
Oh willpower
Yeah sorry about that

(01:51:44):
It got a three
Beat a three
Noo
Damn
It blows the cold air at you
Yeah does nothing
Mira is
Standing there
Do you guys want help with this
Or you think you got it
Jump on in

(01:52:06):
It's fun
I'm just like riding seven vacuum cleaners
Yeah come down to the water it's fine
Mira
In chat
What would Mira do
I named this character after you
So why don't you tell me what they would do
And we're going to let Ananka go first
And then we'll come back to chat

(01:52:28):
Ananka it's your go
What do you do
Yes you
Seeing Roger's
Ingenious move with the vacuum cleaners
Okay can I just say
That would be great thumbnail art
A goblin riding on a bunch of vacuums
Seven
Vacuums

(01:52:50):
Just a giant snake
Of a fucking like
Hoover like
Shot vacuum
He's just riding on the giant like
Snaky tubes all duct taped together
Well what do you do
But no
Seeing that I'd actually like
To use my

(01:53:12):
Like con
Conjuration for once again
The chaotic world
Like
Mass hallucination
And essentially
Much like I did the fog in the last one
Essentially
Add in more
Power of like a swirling kind
Of vortex tornado

(01:53:34):
Like add more
Like oomph
To it
Turn it a bit more into a cyclone
Of sucking power
Versus essentially over driving
The vacuum
So you wanted to kind of do like a help action with your magic huh
A little bit yeah
Yeah yeah yeah that's badass
Okay well first I'm gonna look at this

(01:53:56):
I don't know if the world of darkness thing is the right
Spell here for that
The chaotic world thing I don't think that's it but I think
Elemental attack might be good
Like you could use electricity on the power
Of the vacuums you know what I mean
To like boost it up
That would be pretty good so you can do conjuring willpower
For that
And I'm gonna make it an average defense
So every success you get above

(01:54:18):
The defense will give an extra d6
To Connors vacuum Rogers vacuum powers
I got one
Success so go ahead
And roll
Come on Kate
That's a one you also got a one
Your glitch die is a six
Um
Do you want to explain to us
Uh the

(01:54:40):
Extraordinary thing that happens
Whenever you do this
Uh essentially I
Will in fact use
The elemental like attack
Like elemental attack of the electricity
Power boosting
The
The sucking
Mechanism in
The vacuums

(01:55:02):
And essentially causing them to overcharge
Like they're sucking up
Penis
Off the rug like it's just
Clanging around
Pulling other little shit into the
Vacuum like every like little
Nickknacks are actually starting to get
Caught in the vacuum as well
This fucking pawn shop
Okay um with the critical success we're gonna

(01:55:24):
Give you two d6 on your
Next damage roll
Um Connors um we'll give you two extra
Stun damage on your next damage roll
Also Mira says not knowing
Her abilities but she's a mage so I think she'd use
An air spell to cause Roger to fly
On his vacuums
Very cool
Ha ha ha
This deserves a song

(01:55:46):
To be written about it
Um okay so we're gonna make this an average
Defense um we're gonna say
Mira will use her
Willpower
Sorcery here
She had to be to three she got a four
So that's gonna give you an extra two
Stun damage as you begin to fly
If you can hit your next
Attack um your next

(01:56:08):
Attack will do eleven
Stun if you can hit it
Hmm
Eleven
Hmm but first
It's Eon
And Roger together so
Eon what do you do
Any ideas
Roger
Hey

(01:56:30):
It's made of air
Yeah I'm just gonna end this thing with
A fucking vacuum again this things are out of
Control
Oh we're doing that okay
It's made of air the only
Way to get like to defeat
Is it is essentially to rip it apart
Rip apart
It's spirit so if not
You gotta

(01:56:52):
Essentially disintegrate it
It's it's ear
Do you have to essentially
Have a different vacuum
So I think that's doing great
Gotcha
Um so she's gonna
Reach out with her umbrella again
Aiming at the creature and she's
Gonna this blue pulsating
Light starts coming through her hands

(01:57:14):
And it goes through the umbrella
Shaft and out the front of it
And I'm gonna cast mana bolt
Very
Cool I was excited what like the
Description of mana bolt was gonna be
As a vampire do you want it to be like a blue
Magic it could be anything
Oh you know what I'm gonna make it red
Yeah like red
Bloodstream

(01:57:36):
I was thinking bolt so
Electricity popped to mind but yeah no
Definitely definitely red
Hell yeah um does it say what the defense on mana bolt
Is
It is um
Oh my god
Ch ch ch
No
The defense is uh sorcery plus willpower
Strength

(01:57:58):
Strength plus willpower um
Oh sorry strength
And it has armor avoidance um but it does
Six piercing alright
Um armor strength plus willpower
That's only a ten here
Got a three which means you succeed
Which means you actually have one point above
The defense which means it does

(01:58:20):
Seven piercing
As it hits this thing you want to explain a little bit
As it hits it
Yeah
Seeing as how Anonka was like
It needs to be torn apart she's gonna
Cast mana bolt and have
So cheers
Oh right
Um she's gonna cast it

(01:58:42):
And have the like kind of
It looks like electricity a little bit but
It's all red and glowy and it's
Gonna just start kind of
Going off in tendrils and trying to
Rip the thing apart
Hell yeah also yes
Steve we're taking that suggestion
Steve did it again
Hell yeah electric blood
Hell yeah

(01:59:04):
The last album name um okay
It the red
Electricity
Hits it and it's like
As it's floating around half its body
Is getting sucked into this vacuum
And it's trying so hard to escape
It's like ahhhh and then it's Roger's turn
What do Roger? Sorry you feel like a threat
I'm gonna attempt to advance

(01:59:26):
Forward with the vacuum in turn
Sucking up more of the spirit
Hell yeah
Thanks Isaiah. Nice. Continue on
Roger. Yeah
I'm doing my vacuum
Attack sucking more of the dude
Up
Just sucking dude
Yeah so this is strength agility

(01:59:48):
Roll it
And you have to beat three
Hey uh
Fuck. That's a two
I'm gonna use my couch coin
To reroll
Okay the cool thing about
So chat when they say reroll

(02:00:10):
You get to reroll
You have to reroll your whole pool
Of dice. Whenever you use
A couch coin to reroll you only
Have to reroll um
Failures
So since you got two successes here
You get to hold on to those two successes
And then just reroll 12d6
Oh

(02:00:32):
Yeah I think that's the way it is
I think it might actually only be one failure
You get to reroll one dice I think is actually what it is
Um I'll have to look
That uh but for now
I'm gonna say it's the pool because that's fun
I'm sucking dudes
I'm trying to do that
Um just do 12d6

(02:00:54):
Underneath the little dice guy on the left
I'm cool with that
Uh 12
I think you can only do up to
Eight at a time
Hold on hold on I got this I got this
Uh other modifiers
Here we go this will do it
Yeah hell yeah
That's 12
So now it's now it's a uh

(02:01:16):
Six right
Six that's it
See those fucking couch coins are powerful
Y'all powerful
So on six successes that also means
You got three above
The defense which makes it net points
Which means it does an additional three stun damage
So in total you're doing 14 stun damage
The spirit of air only
Had ten stun

(02:01:38):
Left so you've over killed it
So at this point in this
Pawn shop with all of this chaos happening
I'm gonna give you Roger
Free rein to explain exactly how this
Happens but it will end
With the air elemental inside
Of the tanks of the
Vacuums still able to be talked
To what happens
Okay

(02:02:00):
Well I'm riding
This fucking crazy hose around
I managed to get the rest of the wind spirit
Inside
And then you know I slowly dropped to the ground
Because now there's nothing attached to the
Hose
So as it keeps sucking I scream
In there
Nice try asshole
Why don't you try this on for size

(02:02:22):
And I pull my pants down a little bit
And I shit in the tube
Fucking
Who let Connor play a call with
Who did this
Do you want me to roll
Willpower and strength
I don't know Jim
Or shit
Willpower and strength
Oh lord he's shitting

(02:02:44):
That's anyway
I start sucking
If he gets a critical hit does he
Prolapse
I make it a very hard roll
That's five for five you succeed
Where's my glitch die
Oh it's only a four
Damn it
Damn it

(02:03:06):
If he got a one on the glitch die could he have
Prolapsed his anus while pushing one out
Absolutely
As Rodney's lawyer it's unethical
But technically not illegal
His air elementals only have few rights
A turd
Flops onto the tube and gets sucked up
Look
Through the fucking tube

(02:03:28):
And then it splits off into its seven vacuums
Seven different parts of the wind spirit in it
Holy shit
The air elemental is
Defeated
Roger congratulations
What the fuck
Welcome to the Grouch
Couch Amy
This is the best

(02:03:50):
This is what you can expect
For the next twelve weeks
I'm so here
There's something else I want to mention
There's a kid
Outside of the pawn shop
Who witnessed all of this happening
And he's just peering into the
Glass window and he's just saying
Get shit on
Get shit on

(02:04:12):
Get shit on
Yeah I feel like Bob's there too
Get shit on
There's like a crowd
Alright
Your ass
Get shit on
The air elemental is
Technically defeated
Anonka

(02:04:34):
You fall to your knees holding the crow skull
Icon necklace
And then
Your vision, you don't have any vision
You have a vision
Of the crow
It comes to you
And it says
Hold on

(02:04:56):
There we go
Um
Very well done
You are now
The guide of the crow
Go forth
You may call upon me
For assistance
I as well may call upon you

(02:05:18):
For assistance
And then this time instead of the crow
Swallowing you whole
It wraps you in its wings
And then you wake up and you're wearing the necklace
And then you wake up and you just see Roger pointing and laughing
At a bunch of vacuums

(02:05:42):
Get on it
Oh goodness
There's comedy drama around here baby
Um
Mission success
Um is there anything you want to say to this air elemental
Or do anything else in this pawn shop before
I move forward with the plot here
Uh yeah

(02:06:04):
I guess whatever the fuck
Get shit on is
I would like to approach the vacuum
And kneel beside it
And
Graciously
Wish it peace
When it
It is cause it's an air elemental
It'll get back up
It'll reform correctly

(02:06:26):
But wish it peace on its
Furthering journey
Nice
You get down and try to talk to it but it's hard
Because the vacuums are insanely loud
Vzzzzzzzz
And you push the button on the vacuums
And as it does the air settles
In the vacuums and it's not this
Glorious blue air
Elemental anymore it's kind of like brown

(02:06:48):
And yellowish
Spinning in the
Vacuums and it stops
And it looks at you and it says
Battle well fought
Although
Unconventional
Maybe I'm
Old school but
That was unfair

(02:07:10):
Hahahaha
You getting shit on
Was not part of my plan
But there's
There's little that can't stop him
Honestly
Who pinned this?
Steve pinned it? Sorry
Nero said so if it gets released does it evolve
Into a shit emmental?
Ayayay

(02:07:32):
It says
Take the crow spirit
Do well
You are now
The representative
Good luck
And if you could
Let me free before you go
I'm gonna go
Haunt a port-a-body or something

(02:07:54):
Hahahaha
Go haunt a public pool
Yes
And then I'm gonna look to Eon
Like I'm gonna
Call Eon over
And ask her to unclip
The vacuum
Like tops
Like

(02:08:16):
Essentially where it was all collecting
Like pop the tops on him
Are you sure? Yeah
It's okay to do that?
It'll be fine
Oh well if you say that
Okay and she'll do it
Nice
Nice
You unclip everything and Roger you see
In awe is this brown fart cloud

(02:08:38):
Reassembles in front of you
It bows
And then it flies out of the pawn shop
And as it flies out
There's like this
Old looking
Dwarven man
With very tan skin approaching
Whistling spinning his
Keys and you look out
To see the sun is rising

(02:09:00):
You can only assume the dwarf is coming to open
His pawn shop for the day
And he stops in his tracks
His jaw hits the ground
And he drops his keys on the ground
Like
Oh
Is he smoking a cigarette
By any chance?
No
Oh damn it

(02:09:24):
Jesus
What the
Oh
He's looking up there's just shit stains
On the ceiling the windows are all blown
Out there's like burnt grenades
All the arcade machines are
Seizing out playing some weird version of
Don't stop me now all the vacuums
Are all taped together
He's like oh

(02:09:46):
Why?
We found it like this?
Wha
Why?
Um
Hold on sir
Just once

(02:10:08):
Eh eh
Eh
Eh
Eh
Those of you just listening
Connor put his ski mask back on
Roger did
We are
The van known as balloon
Knot
Don't you ever forget this

(02:10:30):
Balloon knot
Um
Then I'm gonna jump out the window and go
Raggle fraggle
You jump out the window right next to him
You hit the ground and he looks and he goes
Why?
Why?
He's just looking at you
Raggle fraggle
And then he goes back

(02:10:52):
You hear Mira she goes I found it
I found it time to go time to go
And she scurries out holding this large
Silver necklace time to go
And he goes hey hey
That's mine
And Bob's like come on hurry up hurry up
Hurry up hurry up
Alright
Um I'm gonna set down
A bottle of mustard soda and be like

(02:11:14):
Sorry
And just leave
Why?
Me hand
What?
You gotta leave me out
Yes I will grab your hand if you let me
Yes
This way
Why?
Jesus

(02:11:36):
Jesus
You guys pile back up in the car
As you guys are leaving you see his hands are just on his head
He's just looking at the rubble
There's just fire and music
And blinking lights
And you guys drive away
Into the sunrise
Yeah

(02:12:04):
The battle's over
You guys all now sit on the bus
Together and you all gather in a circle
As Bob's driving through the city
And you all get together
And you all gather in a circle as Bob's driving through the night
You're sitting on the bus
And you gather around Mira
And Mira puts the
Necklace over her neck
And she says

(02:12:26):
This
This
Should be able to
Well protect me
Hopefully shadow my
Mystic magic from
Those awful demons
For this I thank you three
I will be
Returning to my place at the university
Soon

(02:12:48):
And I will let Mr. Johnson know
That everything went well
As a
Consolation prize
Your guys is
The name of your band I've seen it written
On your van
I think it was also tattooed on your
Goblin friend's ass
Metal Omnicon
Yeah

(02:13:10):
Yeah
You said the thing
Yeah well as a consolation prize
In my magical
Magical yeah in my magical studies
I found this
Page of this book
I don't know what it is but it mentions something
About a metal Omnicon a couple few times
Maybe you guys can
Have it and she

(02:13:32):
Hands it over to Eon
Obviously because Anonka can't read
And she says
I was gonna look into it
A little bit more
I have a friend his name's Crow
He works in the underground market
Selling stuff
Maybe go see him maybe he can help you with
This if it's got something to do with your band
I don't know

(02:13:54):
Also my love
Mira you're going back to
The university
He told Gillian
Vanderbeek she might be able to
Set you some right ways about
How to conceal your magic a bit more
And still be able to use it
Okay
Yeah I think maybe just not using it
In public in front of security

(02:14:16):
In front of cameras
Other kinds of stuff like that you know it might work out
But you know my friend was in danger
So I did what I had to do
Oh yeah
I get that
Now friends I'll leave you
With this the winds
They blow
Fate
And they blow strange tonight

(02:14:38):
I think
You three might seek what you do not understand
And I think the path ahead
May be dark
But the music
Of metal will guide you
Look out for our next single
Vacuum Wizard
Can I

(02:15:00):
Give Turk an item? You can
But it would go to an NPC
That I'm controlling
Alright
At this point
You guys have about
We have a little bit of time left here
Now I want to open it up fully
For a narrative initiative
To allow you guys to explain what happens in the scene
Explain what happens to you and your friends

(02:15:22):
We're going to take turns
You guys go back to Mr. Johnson
Do you hang out in the
I'm going to give it to Bob
Bob Zombie the bus driver
Hell yeah
Let's see what he gets
Selfie stick
I need to get a deck of random items like that
He gets a
Ingram smart gun

(02:15:44):
Nine
My guy reppin a clock now
Damn I actually fucking like that
A smart gun
Does it automatically aim?
It's a submachine gun
I don't know
No
Because Bob found this
Because if he
Facts

(02:16:06):
Because if he
O-O-Aims
I'll trade him a shotgun
Bob's like
Well man look
You know
I found this gun in my glove box
It's got the name
Zindadi engraved on the side
Of it
If you want it I'll trade it for a shotgun

(02:16:28):
I mean zombie with a shotgun
Let's do it man
Hello gun
Turn on gun
Sorry
You guys trade
Okay but now
I guess we're going to start with
Eon tell us what happens next
You guys return to Mr. Johnson
Do you drop mirror off

(02:16:50):
What happens? We're going to let you do your thing
Explain a little bit for us
We're going to drop
Mirror off first because
She needs to get somewhere
Safe and off of this bus which
Those people clearly saw
As we were leaving
So we'll drop her off
Somewhere a decent distance
Away from that cyber cafe

(02:17:12):
And then
We'll go ahead and head toward
Do we normally meet
Johnson somewhere
Specifically like just the gas station
Or? You could call him
And meet him wherever you like
Alright
She'll take out her little phone and
The buttons and

(02:17:34):
Press them and then when she checks it
A third time adjusting
Her glasses and then she's going to call him
And tell him the job is complete
And that we're ready for our guitar
Strings and bass strings because everything
Is warping
Nice, nice
I don't know how music
Instruments work
Strings don't work

(02:17:56):
I love you so much
He goes fair
Okay
I'll make sure
It's your next show you have coming up
I have all your equipment and
Your 8 karma has been
Put into your accounts
To use
It was 9
Who said that?

(02:18:18):
Who am I on the phone with?
Yes
You're on speaker phone you dunce
Oh, was I not supposed to put you on?
The whole band's damaged
The whole band's damaged
Plus back pay
Yeah dude
Go ahead, roll me charisma charisma
It was 9
Roll me charisma check

(02:18:40):
It was 9
Uh huh, I'm sure it was
Uh huh
Come on Ananka
Oh bitch yes
He goes
Alright I'll give you 9 that's fine
You have a total of
10 then alright

(02:19:02):
Now
The cheesecake
You'll have it
Very well
I will contact you soon
For your next job
We've got a couple of days
Until your show and your gig
And you'll be contacted

(02:19:24):
Alright
We did it
Yes you did, congrats
Okay, salutations
And he hangs up the phone
Peace
Eat shit
Bim ba bim ba ba
Blue
You rascal
My goodness

(02:19:46):
Language
I can't
Blame Roger
I'm sorry I'm sorry
Consume shit
Thank you
Much better
You know what I'm into it today
Johnny Johnson
Just coming after us trying to make us
Skint

(02:20:08):
Alright, you've got your pay
Now we'll move over here to Roger
Roger what happens next?
Eh
Well I'm just plopping myself
In the cock
Now
You know this whole thing inspired
Me to write a new song
Move your mic closer you're cutting in and out buddy
Sorry

(02:20:30):
Let me be a little louder for you
This whole
Ordeal inspired
Me to write a new song
That's what I'm gonna do
Hell yeah
Typing away
At
Nice, nice, do you um
Know where you guys take the
Bus next? Is there something specific

(02:20:52):
You guys do?
Nope, Roger's just writing songs
Alright Anonka, what about you?
Oh
So we have
A little RV park
That we tend to bring the boss to
In the interim of shows
And
We go and bring the boss there

(02:21:14):
And kind of set up
We pay to get in
So we get the wifi and all the
Plumbing and stuff that we can do the hookups
For the big boss
But in the interim
You know and into the
Interim I'm probably gonna spend a lot
Of time just
Mentally astral
Projecting and kind of focusing on

(02:21:36):
The necklace
And kind of just exploring
The aether and then
As Roger is coming
Up with his song when he tells us
The title I actually
Astral project for a while
To get like into another
Dimension to get ideas for
The next album cover
Nice

(02:21:58):
Badass
Do you have a name
For the song already Roger? Or just
No alright fair fair is fair
I like Vacuum Wizard
But I'd like to submit
Suck Wizard
The Suck Wizard

(02:22:20):
The Suck Master
Suck Master there we go
Let's do a poll
Let's do a poll and chat
We'll do a poll during the break
Suck Wizard or Suck Master
Great look I don't have an intention
To write a song every single week but if we get
Inspired like that

(02:22:42):
You know it might happen so y'all need
To make sure to follow us on Spotify okay
And then we can
Release if it is every week you can
Release 12 songs as the next
EP
Or just 12 singles
Hehehehe
Hell yeah
Siphon Sorcery oh shit
Certifiable might have been

(02:23:04):
That's fucking good
At least you know Roger is a regular
As much as he bodily functions on things
Yeah
Jesus Christ
Okay all vampires are
They get what they need yes indeed
Okay well my friends that's where we're going to end it
For tonight you guys packed up
Chilling first quest success
You did the things

(02:23:26):
Met some folks learned a little bit about the city
You also get some points to level up with
Before next time around which is very fun
And yeah
Congratulations we are
Going to get the fuck out of costume everybody
These guys are going to get their makeups off and stuff
So it's going to be 10 minutes but we're going to come
Right back after that for our faction fight
And for our
Breakdown alright so

(02:23:48):
Don't go anywhere
Cheers heroes part of the crew
All over
Dragon man video
Lumbering patty subscribers
Recess the world tabletop
Big Jim Pop, Wade Gaming, Cheers DMC
Forge of Lore, Fondue Rapids, Zero Hamless
And Forge of Lore
Rating with a party of 9
The next time of love

(02:24:10):
Death and dice, Turkey
Finally fixes his mustache
Ananka
Finds the strength to deal with Roger even
More, does Roger need depends
Is he possibly incontinent
And Aeon King
Discoveres a new baking
Recipe for muffins
Tune in for the next time of
Love Death and Dice

(02:24:32):
Love muffins

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TheGrouchCouch: Metalomnicon #1 | Shadowrun Anarchy

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