March 31, 2025 • 21 mins
Ever found yourself scrolling through social media, feeling increasingly inadequate as you see other entrepreneurs seemingly crushing it while you're struggling with basic tasks? That comparison trap is exactly what we're tackling head-on today.
The concept of "staying in your own lane" might sound simple, but it's a discipline I personally struggle with daily. Throughout this episode, I share my raw experience organizing my first in-person event and how comparison nearly derailed the entire process. When we measure our beginning against someone else's middle, we set ourselves up for unnecessary discouragement.
What makes this comparison particularly toxic is that we're rarely comparing equivalent situations. That entrepreneur with the massive audience? They've been at it for years. The business owner with the seamless systems? They've likely failed their way to that success through countless iterations. As I explain, "Don't compare your chapter two to somebody's chapter twenty" – the numbers might change, but the principle remains the same.
Social media compounds this problem by showing only curated highlight reels. As I describe it, many seemingly successful entrepreneurs are "paddling like absolute lunatics under that still sea of calm." Without seeing the behind-the-scenes reality, we compare our complete picture against someone else's carefully filtered presentation.
The solution? Practical steps to refocus on your journey: limit social media consumption, unfollow those who trigger comparison, measure progress against your starting point, celebrate small wins, and create plans aligned with your unique vision. Your business journey is yours alone – embrace it rather than trying to recreate someone else's path.
Take a moment to reflect on your recent wins, and if you're feeling brave, share them with me on LinkedIn or in my Facebook group. Your progress deserves celebration, no matter how small it might seem compared to others.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
You're listening to the Mindset in Action podcast,
the place to be to grow andstreamline your business.
I'm your host, donna Eade.
Let's jump into the show.
Welcome back to the podcast,everybody.
Today we are talking aboutstaying in your own lane, and
(00:24):
this is something that I have toremind myself of multiple times
throughout the day, the week,the month, you name it.
I'm constantly having to remindmyself of this, and it might be
something that you need toremember as well.
So what do I mean by staying inyour own lane?
This is where we put ourblinkers on and we ignore what
(00:49):
everybody else is doing and westick to the plan.
And although there is somethingto be said for looking around,
you know we've got to do a bitof competitor analysis sometimes
.
You know we've got to learnfrom people who've been there,
done that, bought the T-shirtand are bigger than us.
There are lots of reasons whywe will look outside, but the
problem is is when you let thatcompletely take over your
(01:13):
mindset of what you're doing inyour business and what we forget
is that everybody else is doingsomething different.
Either they're selling adifferent service They've got
more experience, they've gotmore years under their belt.
They're selling a differentservice.
They've got more experience,they've got more years under
their belt.
They're at a different pricepoint.
There can.
There is so much that could bedifferent, so we can't compare
(01:34):
ourselves, we can't do theapples to apples comparison,
because it just doesn't existand because of that we end up
creating that overwhelm, thatdoubt, that imposter syndrome,
because we can't get our headsout of our own way and remember
that we are on our own journey.
And so this is something that Iwant to talk about, because it
(01:58):
is something that has come upfor me recently in the fact that
I've been creating this event.
You might not know about it,but it's taking place this
Thursday as I'm dropping thispodcast and I am so super
excited to be getting togetherwith everybody.
But it did lead me to thatcomparison that you know I'm not
(02:20):
good enough.
You know I'm not good enough.
I shouldn't have done it.
I haven't sold enough tickets.
I'm.
What was I thinking?
You know, all of thoseso-and-so's done it better than
me.
So-and-so got more people attheir event.
I don't know how I'm going tocope with this.
Is this a good thing?
Should I cancel it?
(02:41):
Shouldn't I?
All of those things over thecourse of the last couple of
months as I've been working upand creating this event.
All of those things came up atdifferent points during the
journey, because I was lookingoutside of myself and I didn't
have my blinkers on.
I didn't focus on what wasimportant, which was why had I
set up this event in the firstplace, who did I want there and
(03:04):
how was I going to get themthere?
And that should have been themain focus and that should have
been what I focused on to afault, without looking outside
at everything else, because thepeople that I'm looking at that
do that, you know, had eventsthat had more people.
These people have been doingevents for a lot longer than me.
(03:26):
This is my first ever in-personevent, so it wasn't going to be
as big as theirs.
My ticket sales, I priced mytickets cheaper than those other
people because it's the firsttime that I've done the event,
and so I knew that I was likeI've got to get people in to
(03:46):
trust that it's going to be agood event, so you've got to
start at a lower price point,which was absolutely fine, and I
did that.
So there were lots of thingsthat sort of came up over the
last couple of months.
That just reminded me of thisstory that we have to keep
reminding ourselves of stayingin our own lane.
It is really important duringbusiness, if you're a podcaster,
(04:09):
to keep that in mind, becausewhat it does is, if you focus on
what everybody else is doing,you lose your own path, you lose
your own direction and all of asudden you start to do things
that weren't part of the plan,because you're trying to catch
up to where somebody else is, oryou're trying to capture the
(04:31):
audience somebody else has got,or you're trying to do something
to get you to where one ofthese other people are, which
isn't helping you with whatyou're actually doing, and you
lose sight of what you're doing.
So this can you know.
This can happen with in-personevents, like I've said here, but
this could happen with yourpodcast.
So if you're doing a podcastand you're looking at somebody
(04:52):
else who seemingly has moredownloads than you or is getting
bigger guests on their podcastor is, you know, getting
sponsorships on their podcast,it's very easy to read into that
that they're better than you atthis, or you know you're not
doing good enough in that, sothat can happen.
(05:13):
And then in your business.
Have you got as many clients asthe person next to you at the
networking event?
No, then you must be failing,right?
Well, no, because they'reselling something completely
different to you and theiraudience is different and the
need is different and their callto action is you know, it's all
different and we can't compareourselves.
(05:33):
But what it does when we dothat is, it's just harmful.
So it takes away from whatwe're doing.
It puts us in thatcomparisonitis stage which can
make you feel icky about otherpeople, because you're just like
oh, it's not fair, they'redoing better than me or whatever
.
And that doesn't come from thatlovely place that we all love
to be in, which is thegenerosity place, where we want
(05:55):
to be kind to everybody andgenerous to everybody and give
of our time and our help andcare for other people and do all
of that stuff, which is part ofour human nature, I think.
But when the comparison comesin, that is when that kind of
mean girl status comes in andwe're just like, oh, they're
doing this and they've got itbetter than me, so why should I
help them?
(06:15):
And all of that stuff comes in,not Not saying that you deal
with that, not saying that Ideal with that in particular,
but I can see how people can getto that point and it is really
hard and you really do have topull yourself back and go look,
that person is not theirbusiness, that person is
somebody else.
Just because their business issuccessful you know that's
(06:37):
nothing to feel threatened by issuccessful.
You know that's nothing to feelthreatened by, and you know
you've got to take people atface value.
Let them show you who they areand believe them when they show
you.
So if they are a kind, generousperson, you will probably find
that actually some of the mostsuccessful business owners are
(06:58):
really kind and really generous.
That's what I have seen in myworld and you know I that is the
sort of thing that I do like toemulate.
You know it's like well, I wantto be that generous and I want
to be that giving.
And, of course, as somebody whois earlier on in their business
journey than some of thesepeople that I'm aspiring to be
(07:19):
like, I can't be as generous asI would like to or as giving as
I would like to, because I justdon't have the facilities, the
ability to do those things.
But being grateful when it isshown to you and passing on a
level of generosity that you canpass on is really a way of
starting to build that, thosegood points that we do want to
(07:43):
emulate when we see other people.
So, like I said, one of thestories that I was sort of told,
the way that I was told it wasyou know, don't compare your
chapter two to somebody'schapter 20, and you can choose
whichever numbers you want, aslong as there's a big gap,
because that is where theirexperience is going to trump you
(08:07):
.
You know they have had theexperience, they've had the
downfalls, they've gone throughthe mistakes, they've learned
the lessons and they've come outthe other side and you aren't
there yet.
And as much as we can learnfrom these bigger people in the
space, these people that havebeen in business longer, they're
you know.
Look at if you're a parent,look at how we teach our
(08:31):
children.
How many times do you try andsave your children from making
the same mistake you did?
And they have to go through itand they have to make their own
mistakes, and it's almost thesame in businesses.
So, like we can't really learnwithout failing, without making
the mistakes ourselves, becauseeven as adults, you know
(08:52):
somebody could say, no, youdon't want to do that, because I
tried it and this happened.
Well, in reality, just becausethey tried it and that happened
doesn't mean the same thing willhappen for you.
But we do get in our own headsof that, you know well.
Just because that happened toyou doesn't mean it's going to
happen to me.
I'm going to try it.
Maybe it fails, maybe itdoesn't.
But the thing is is we have tomake our own mistakes.
(09:14):
So you don't want to compareyourself to somebody who's 10
years in business if you're onlythree years in business,
because it's just not comparable.
You need to make sure that youare really feeling into your
sense of self, your beliefsystem, your plans, your dreams,
(09:35):
your desires and how you'regoing to make those happen your
dreams, your desires and howyou're going to make those
happen.
And you can look to the biggercreators to see how they made it
happen for them and what youcan take from that which would
work for you and yourpersonality.
But it's not about recreatingtheir business, it's about
creating your business.
So you can't take it word forword what they say and just
(10:00):
replicate it.
That's not going to work,because their business works for
them and their personality andtheir audience and what they're
selling.
So you have to find your ownway to a degree, but we can
always learn from these otherentrepreneurs in the space that
have been there and done itbefore.
But it's not about comparingyourself to them, it's about
(10:20):
learning from them.
So, like I said, your journeyis completely unique and your
progress is going to happen atyour own pace and it can be
really, really.
(10:44):
I don't know what the word isthat I'm looking for, but it's
really discombobulating, for forwant of a better word, when you
see all of these stories andobviously everybody wants to
present themselves in the bestpossible light on social media
because they're trying toattract their clients, but the
reality, the behind the scenes,what is actually happening, may
(11:06):
be something very different towhat you're seeing on social
media, and you may see somebodysharing things all the time and
think, oh, they must have it alltogether.
They must be doing really wellfor paddling like an absolute
lunatic under that still sea ofcalm and they are struggling to
(11:27):
keep up and they're strugglingto make it work.
But you wouldn't know that fromtheir social media and this is
the problem with the fact thatwe do have this kind of internet
access these days where we'reall just seeing what people put
out there.
We're not really having thosegenuine conversations that we
used to have when we all workedin offices and we're having that
(11:49):
gossip over the water fountainor the the tea station or
whatever.
You're not having those deepconversations where you're
actually getting to knowsomebody, getting to know that
behind the scenes.
It's very rare that you havethat unless you have a close
network and you've beennetworking for a long time and
you've got that group.
Oftentimes you find those arethe people that can can show you
(12:11):
the reality and say, okay, yes,you've seen xyz on social media
from them, but you know thebehind the scenes because you're
close to them.
So you've got to remember thatthat is happening to everybody.
So somebody who is huge, um,like Mel Robbins, for example,
you know you might think she'sgot it all together.
She's making millions, she'sgot this podcast that's really
(12:34):
popular, she's on all theseother really big podcasts, she's
selling books, she's doing this, she's doing the other.
But the reality of it and we doknow quite a bit about Mel's
backstory and her behind thescenes, as it were, because she
does share it a lot, becausethat's part of her thing, you
know, is showing you how she hasstruggled and how she has got
(12:56):
past that.
What is happening behind thescenes you don't know how hard
she is or isn't working.
You don't know the stressesthat come with a book deadline
and trying to make sure thatyou've got everything right and
that it's the right thing thatyou want to put out there in
(13:18):
time for that deadline.
All of those things aresomething that they are having
to deal with that you aren'tgoing to necessarily know about.
So we've got to remember thatwhat shows up on social media
isn't the reality of thesituation.
It is what that person wantsthe outside world to see,
(13:38):
whether that's because they wantto pretend that they are rich
and successful, or whether it'sbecause they want to portray the
best version of themselves fortheir clients to attract the
right clients to them or other.
You know there could be otherreasons for it, but just because
(13:59):
you're seeing parts of theirlives on social media doesn't
mean that you're seeing thewhole picture, and there will be
people that will be honest.
You know I have been honest onmy social media, on this podcast
, about my mental health andabout my overall health journey,
things like that that I'vespoken about.
But I haven't sat here andtalked about how successful or
not successful my business is,and that's the difference is
(14:21):
that a lot of people will letyou into a little bit of their
personal life so you can get toknow, like and trust them and
realise that they're human, butthey're not necessarily giving
you the dirty scoop of theirbusiness.
So it is hard when you see whatyou are portraying as somebody
really successful, doing reallysuccessful things in their
(14:42):
business, when the actuality ofit could be, could be very
different to what you're seeing,and that is a hard one to deal
with, which is again why we needto stay in our own lane.
It's not focusing on whateverybody else is doing.
It's focusing on what we aredoing, what our dreams are,
where we want our business to go.
So limit social media in yourcomparisons.
(15:07):
Like really try to put theblinkers on.
Have your core people thatreally motivate you and lift you
up and inspire you.
Anybody that doesn't do that,unfollow them.
You do not need to see them inyour feed.
Get rid of them, because thatis not going to help you.
Then make sure that you arecomparing yourself from where
(15:31):
you started.
Look back at the beginning ofyour journey.
Where were you and how far haveyou come?
I think a lot of us forget tolook back at where we've
actually been and where we arenow in comparison, because we're
always moving on to the nextgoal, the next goal, the next
goal, and we don't take theopportunity to stop and listen,
(15:51):
which is another reason why I'mdoing this event on Thursday,
because I am somebody who reallyis it falls into that category.
I don't celebrate the littlewins.
I don't even feel like they'reworth celebrate like that.
I'm worth celebrating in thatway.
It's not something I do whenI've had a good launch or, you
know, I've sold a program or gota new client.
(16:13):
This isn't something that I goout and celebrate.
I'm like this is just part ofbusiness, right, but these are
milestones and these are thingsto be proud of.
Yet we don't take enough timeto actually stop and do that.
So take a look back at whereyou were in the beginning and
where you are now and compareyourself to that, because that
is going to be your benchmarkwhere you started.
(16:35):
So, like I said, celebratethose small wins we're going to
be celebrating on Thursday.
I am going to be getting thewhole audience in on this
celebrating.
I want to LinkedIn Donna Eid andI'm on my group on Facebook
(17:03):
Start Podcast UK with Donna Eid.
So if you want to come andfollow me in any of those spaces
, dm me and tell me what yourwins are.
I would love to know, small orbig, if you manage to set up an
email automation, which has beendoing your head in for weeks,
or a funnel, or you have managedto work out how to do an
automation, you have gained 10people on your email list in the
(17:28):
last month.
You know.
Whatever it is, big or small, Iwould love to know your wins
and then make your plan andstick to your plan.
It is your business, it is yourrules, it is your journey.
So make sure that you arecreating a plan that works for
you and how you want to run yourbusiness and we're going to be
talking about this at my eventon Thursday how to plan for the
(17:52):
business that you want and Ihave got Andrea Rainsford coming
to talk to us about that.
It's going to be fantastic.
And then, like I said, find theinspiration, not the competition
.
You know who inspires you, whomakes you want to do better
rather than makes you feel likethey're doing better than me,
(18:13):
because there are people.
There are people that you knowour personalities don't gel.
We don't particularly like theway they are as people, and then
it kind of feels like how canthey be so successful when
they're like that?
But the fact is that we allinterpret people differently.
So somebody who you findannoying, somebody else is going
to think is the best thingsince sliced bread.
(18:35):
So you know, we want to findthose people that we are really
drawn to, whose personalitieskind of match our own, that we
can see, as you know, peoplethat we would love to be like
when we're that far down theline in our business.
Follow those people, getinspired by those people and get
rid of anybody who doesn't fitthat category.
(18:57):
So that is it for today, guys.
I just wanted to bring you thislittle episode on staying in
your own lane.
So take action, make a plan,don't compare yourself to other
people, even and remind yourselfof this Whenever you take on
something new, like for me itwas this event.
I've never done an in-personevent before and the first thing
(19:19):
I started to do was comparemyself to other people who run
events, all of whom who havebeen running events for more
than a year, you know, more than10 years in some cases.
So I'm not going to be able todo what they do.
So that is it for today, guys.
I hope to see some of youlisteners on Thursday at the
(19:41):
event.
If I am not seeing you then,then have a fantastic week.
I will obviously feed back onthe event afterwards and I'm
hoping to have the sessions toshare on the podcast at some
point.
So look out for those comingdown the line.
I have a very special guestepisode coming up very, very
(20:03):
soon.
I think it might be next week.
I'm not sure how the editing isgoing to go, how the episodes
are going.
It may well come out the weekbefore my birthday episode, or
it may come out the week after,and the birthday episode is
whichever one falls closest tothe 16th of April.
So that is it for today.
Very excited to bring you thisvery special guest.
(20:23):
We had a fantastic conversationand it's going to be awesome.
So, yeah, that's it for today,guys.
See you soon.
Bye for now.
You're listening to the Mindset in Action podcast,
the place to be to grow andstreamline your business.
I'm your host, donna Eade.
Let's jump into the show.
Welcome back to the podcast,everybody.
Today we are talking aboutstaying in your own lane, and
(00:24):
this is something that I have toremind myself of multiple times
throughout the day, the week,the month, you name it.
I'm constantly having to remindmyself of this, and it might be
something that you need toremember as well.
So what do I mean by staying inyour own lane?
This is where we put ourblinkers on and we ignore what
(00:49):
everybody else is doing and westick to the plan.
And although there is somethingto be said for looking around,
you know we've got to do a bitof competitor analysis sometimes
.
You know we've got to learnfrom people who've been there,
done that, bought the T-shirtand are bigger than us.
There are lots of reasons whywe will look outside, but the
problem is is when you let thatcompletely take over your
(01:13):
mindset of what you're doing inyour business and what we forget
is that everybody else is doingsomething different.
Either they're selling adifferent service They've got
more experience, they've gotmore years under their belt.
They're selling a differentservice.
They've got more experience,they've got more years under
their belt.
They're at a different pricepoint.
There can.
There is so much that could bedifferent, so we can't compare
(01:34):
ourselves, we can't do theapples to apples comparison,
because it just doesn't existand because of that we end up
creating that overwhelm, thatdoubt, that imposter syndrome,
because we can't get our headsout of our own way and remember
that we are on our own journey.
And so this is something that Iwant to talk about, because it
(01:58):
is something that has come upfor me recently in the fact that
I've been creating this event.
You might not know about it,but it's taking place this
Thursday as I'm dropping thispodcast and I am so super
excited to be getting togetherwith everybody.
But it did lead me to thatcomparison that you know I'm not
(02:20):
good enough.
You know I'm not good enough.
I shouldn't have done it.
I haven't sold enough tickets.
I'm.
What was I thinking?
You know, all of thoseso-and-so's done it better than
me.
So-and-so got more people attheir event.
I don't know how I'm going tocope with this.
Is this a good thing?
Should I cancel it?
(02:41):
Shouldn't I?
All of those things over thecourse of the last couple of
months as I've been working upand creating this event.
All of those things came up atdifferent points during the
journey, because I was lookingoutside of myself and I didn't
have my blinkers on.
I didn't focus on what wasimportant, which was why had I
set up this event in the firstplace, who did I want there and
(03:04):
how was I going to get themthere?
And that should have been themain focus and that should have
been what I focused on to afault, without looking outside
at everything else, because thepeople that I'm looking at that
do that, you know, had eventsthat had more people.
These people have been doingevents for a lot longer than me.
(03:26):
This is my first ever in-personevent, so it wasn't going to be
as big as theirs.
My ticket sales, I priced mytickets cheaper than those other
people because it's the firsttime that I've done the event,
and so I knew that I was likeI've got to get people in to
(03:46):
trust that it's going to be agood event, so you've got to
start at a lower price point,which was absolutely fine, and I
did that.
So there were lots of thingsthat sort of came up over the
last couple of months.
That just reminded me of thisstory that we have to keep
reminding ourselves of stayingin our own lane.
It is really important duringbusiness, if you're a podcaster,
(04:09):
to keep that in mind, becausewhat it does is, if you focus on
what everybody else is doing,you lose your own path, you lose
your own direction and all of asudden you start to do things
that weren't part of the plan,because you're trying to catch
up to where somebody else is, oryou're trying to capture the
(04:31):
audience somebody else has got,or you're trying to do something
to get you to where one ofthese other people are, which
isn't helping you with whatyou're actually doing, and you
lose sight of what you're doing.
So this can you know.
This can happen with in-personevents, like I've said here, but
this could happen with yourpodcast.
So if you're doing a podcastand you're looking at somebody
(04:52):
else who seemingly has moredownloads than you or is getting
bigger guests on their podcastor is, you know, getting
sponsorships on their podcast,it's very easy to read into that
that they're better than you atthis, or you know you're not
doing good enough in that, sothat can happen.
(05:13):
And then in your business.
Have you got as many clients asthe person next to you at the
networking event?
No, then you must be failing,right?
Well, no, because they'reselling something completely
different to you and theiraudience is different and the
need is different and their callto action is you know, it's all
different and we can't compareourselves.
(05:33):
But what it does when we dothat is, it's just harmful.
So it takes away from whatwe're doing.
It puts us in thatcomparisonitis stage which can
make you feel icky about otherpeople, because you're just like
oh, it's not fair, they'redoing better than me or whatever
.
And that doesn't come from thatlovely place that we all love
to be in, which is thegenerosity place, where we want
(05:55):
to be kind to everybody andgenerous to everybody and give
of our time and our help andcare for other people and do all
of that stuff, which is part ofour human nature, I think.
But when the comparison comesin, that is when that kind of
mean girl status comes in andwe're just like, oh, they're
doing this and they've got itbetter than me, so why should I
help them?
(06:15):
And all of that stuff comes in,not Not saying that you deal
with that, not saying that Ideal with that in particular,
but I can see how people can getto that point and it is really
hard and you really do have topull yourself back and go look,
that person is not theirbusiness, that person is
somebody else.
Just because their business issuccessful you know that's
(06:37):
nothing to feel threatened by issuccessful.
You know that's nothing to feelthreatened by, and you know
you've got to take people atface value.
Let them show you who they areand believe them when they show
you.
So if they are a kind, generousperson, you will probably find
that actually some of the mostsuccessful business owners are
(06:58):
really kind and really generous.
That's what I have seen in myworld and you know I that is the
sort of thing that I do like toemulate.
You know it's like well, I wantto be that generous and I want
to be that giving.
And, of course, as somebody whois earlier on in their business
journey than some of thesepeople that I'm aspiring to be
(07:19):
like, I can't be as generous asI would like to or as giving as
I would like to, because I justdon't have the facilities, the
ability to do those things.
But being grateful when it isshown to you and passing on a
level of generosity that you canpass on is really a way of
starting to build that, thosegood points that we do want to
(07:43):
emulate when we see other people.
So, like I said, one of thestories that I was sort of told,
the way that I was told it wasyou know, don't compare your
chapter two to somebody'schapter 20, and you can choose
whichever numbers you want, aslong as there's a big gap,
because that is where theirexperience is going to trump you
(08:07):
.
You know they have had theexperience, they've had the
downfalls, they've gone throughthe mistakes, they've learned
the lessons and they've come outthe other side and you aren't
there yet.
And as much as we can learnfrom these bigger people in the
space, these people that havebeen in business longer, they're
you know.
Look at if you're a parent,look at how we teach our
(08:31):
children.
How many times do you try andsave your children from making
the same mistake you did?
And they have to go through itand they have to make their own
mistakes, and it's almost thesame in businesses.
So, like we can't really learnwithout failing, without making
the mistakes ourselves, becauseeven as adults, you know
(08:52):
somebody could say, no, youdon't want to do that, because I
tried it and this happened.
Well, in reality, just becausethey tried it and that happened
doesn't mean the same thing willhappen for you.
But we do get in our own headsof that, you know well.
Just because that happened toyou doesn't mean it's going to
happen to me.
I'm going to try it.
Maybe it fails, maybe itdoesn't.
But the thing is is we have tomake our own mistakes.
(09:14):
So you don't want to compareyourself to somebody who's 10
years in business if you're onlythree years in business,
because it's just not comparable.
You need to make sure that youare really feeling into your
sense of self, your beliefsystem, your plans, your dreams,
(09:35):
your desires and how you'regoing to make those happen your
dreams, your desires and howyou're going to make those
happen.
And you can look to the biggercreators to see how they made it
happen for them and what youcan take from that which would
work for you and yourpersonality.
But it's not about recreatingtheir business, it's about
creating your business.
So you can't take it word forword what they say and just
(10:00):
replicate it.
That's not going to work,because their business works for
them and their personality andtheir audience and what they're
selling.
So you have to find your ownway to a degree, but we can
always learn from these otherentrepreneurs in the space that
have been there and done itbefore.
But it's not about comparingyourself to them, it's about
(10:20):
learning from them.
So, like I said, your journeyis completely unique and your
progress is going to happen atyour own pace and it can be
really, really.
(10:44):
I don't know what the word isthat I'm looking for, but it's
really discombobulating, for forwant of a better word, when you
see all of these stories andobviously everybody wants to
present themselves in the bestpossible light on social media
because they're trying toattract their clients, but the
reality, the behind the scenes,what is actually happening, may
(11:06):
be something very different towhat you're seeing on social
media, and you may see somebodysharing things all the time and
think, oh, they must have it alltogether.
They must be doing really wellfor paddling like an absolute
lunatic under that still sea ofcalm and they are struggling to
(11:27):
keep up and they're strugglingto make it work.
But you wouldn't know that fromtheir social media and this is
the problem with the fact thatwe do have this kind of internet
access these days where we'reall just seeing what people put
out there.
We're not really having thosegenuine conversations that we
used to have when we all workedin offices and we're having that
(11:49):
gossip over the water fountainor the the tea station or
whatever.
You're not having those deepconversations where you're
actually getting to knowsomebody, getting to know that
behind the scenes.
It's very rare that you havethat unless you have a close
network and you've beennetworking for a long time and
you've got that group.
Oftentimes you find those arethe people that can can show you
(12:11):
the reality and say, okay, yes,you've seen xyz on social media
from them, but you know thebehind the scenes because you're
close to them.
So you've got to remember thatthat is happening to everybody.
So somebody who is huge, um,like Mel Robbins, for example,
you know you might think she'sgot it all together.
She's making millions, she'sgot this podcast that's really
(12:34):
popular, she's on all theseother really big podcasts, she's
selling books, she's doing this, she's doing the other.
But the reality of it and we doknow quite a bit about Mel's
backstory and her behind thescenes, as it were, because she
does share it a lot, becausethat's part of her thing, you
know, is showing you how she hasstruggled and how she has got
(12:56):
past that.
What is happening behind thescenes you don't know how hard
she is or isn't working.
You don't know the stressesthat come with a book deadline
and trying to make sure thatyou've got everything right and
that it's the right thing thatyou want to put out there in
(13:18):
time for that deadline.
All of those things aresomething that they are having
to deal with that you aren'tgoing to necessarily know about.
So we've got to remember thatwhat shows up on social media
isn't the reality of thesituation.
It is what that person wantsthe outside world to see,
(13:38):
whether that's because they wantto pretend that they are rich
and successful, or whether it'sbecause they want to portray the
best version of themselves fortheir clients to attract the
right clients to them or other.
You know there could be otherreasons for it, but just because
(13:59):
you're seeing parts of theirlives on social media doesn't
mean that you're seeing thewhole picture, and there will be
people that will be honest.
You know I have been honest onmy social media, on this podcast
, about my mental health andabout my overall health journey,
things like that that I'vespoken about.
But I haven't sat here andtalked about how successful or
not successful my business is,and that's the difference is
(14:21):
that a lot of people will letyou into a little bit of their
personal life so you can get toknow, like and trust them and
realise that they're human, butthey're not necessarily giving
you the dirty scoop of theirbusiness.
So it is hard when you see whatyou are portraying as somebody
really successful, doing reallysuccessful things in their
(14:42):
business, when the actuality ofit could be, could be very
different to what you're seeing,and that is a hard one to deal
with, which is again why we needto stay in our own lane.
It's not focusing on whateverybody else is doing.
It's focusing on what we aredoing, what our dreams are,
where we want our business to go.
So limit social media in yourcomparisons.
(15:07):
Like really try to put theblinkers on.
Have your core people thatreally motivate you and lift you
up and inspire you.
Anybody that doesn't do that,unfollow them.
You do not need to see them inyour feed.
Get rid of them, because thatis not going to help you.
Then make sure that you arecomparing yourself from where
(15:31):
you started.
Look back at the beginning ofyour journey.
Where were you and how far haveyou come?
I think a lot of us forget tolook back at where we've
actually been and where we arenow in comparison, because we're
always moving on to the nextgoal, the next goal, the next
goal, and we don't take theopportunity to stop and listen,
(15:51):
which is another reason why I'mdoing this event on Thursday,
because I am somebody who reallyis it falls into that category.
I don't celebrate the littlewins.
I don't even feel like they'reworth celebrate like that.
I'm worth celebrating in thatway.
It's not something I do whenI've had a good launch or, you
know, I've sold a program or gota new client.
(16:13):
This isn't something that I goout and celebrate.
I'm like this is just part ofbusiness, right, but these are
milestones and these are thingsto be proud of.
Yet we don't take enough timeto actually stop and do that.
So take a look back at whereyou were in the beginning and
where you are now and compareyourself to that, because that
is going to be your benchmarkwhere you started.
(16:35):
So, like I said, celebratethose small wins we're going to
be celebrating on Thursday.
I am going to be getting thewhole audience in on this
celebrating.
I want to LinkedIn Donna Eid andI'm on my group on Facebook
(17:03):
Start Podcast UK with Donna Eid.
So if you want to come andfollow me in any of those spaces
, dm me and tell me what yourwins are.
I would love to know, small orbig, if you manage to set up an
email automation, which has beendoing your head in for weeks,
or a funnel, or you have managedto work out how to do an
automation, you have gained 10people on your email list in the
(17:28):
last month.
You know.
Whatever it is, big or small, Iwould love to know your wins
and then make your plan andstick to your plan.
It is your business, it is yourrules, it is your journey.
So make sure that you arecreating a plan that works for
you and how you want to run yourbusiness and we're going to be
talking about this at my eventon Thursday how to plan for the
(17:52):
business that you want and Ihave got Andrea Rainsford coming
to talk to us about that.
It's going to be fantastic.
And then, like I said, find theinspiration, not the competition
.
You know who inspires you, whomakes you want to do better
rather than makes you feel likethey're doing better than me,
(18:13):
because there are people.
There are people that you knowour personalities don't gel.
We don't particularly like theway they are as people, and then
it kind of feels like how canthey be so successful when
they're like that?
But the fact is that we allinterpret people differently.
So somebody who you findannoying, somebody else is going
to think is the best thingsince sliced bread.
(18:35):
So you know, we want to findthose people that we are really
drawn to, whose personalitieskind of match our own, that we
can see, as you know, peoplethat we would love to be like
when we're that far down theline in our business.
Follow those people, getinspired by those people and get
rid of anybody who doesn't fitthat category.
(18:57):
So that is it for today, guys.
I just wanted to bring you thislittle episode on staying in
your own lane.
So take action, make a plan,don't compare yourself to other
people, even and remind yourselfof this Whenever you take on
something new, like for me itwas this event.
I've never done an in-personevent before and the first thing
(19:19):
I started to do was comparemyself to other people who run
events, all of whom who havebeen running events for more
than a year, you know, more than10 years in some cases.
So I'm not going to be able todo what they do.
So that is it for today, guys.
I hope to see some of youlisteners on Thursday at the
(19:41):
event.
If I am not seeing you then,then have a fantastic week.
I will obviously feed back onthe event afterwards and I'm
hoping to have the sessions toshare on the podcast at some
point.
So look out for those comingdown the line.
I have a very special guestepisode coming up very, very
(20:03):
soon.
I think it might be next week.
I'm not sure how the editing isgoing to go, how the episodes
are going.
It may well come out the weekbefore my birthday episode, or
it may come out the week after,and the birthday episode is
whichever one falls closest tothe 16th of April.
So that is it for today.
Very excited to bring you thisvery special guest.
(20:23):
We had a fantastic conversationand it's going to be awesome.
So, yeah, that's it for today,guys.
See you soon.
Bye for now.
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