January 27, 2024 • 66 mins
Every family quilt has its unique pattern, with stories as threads weaving through generations. Mine finds such warmth in the recollection of my aunt's life, a narration that'll captivate your heart as it did mine. She unveils a past painted with the hues of romance, the rustic charm of country living, and the delicate strands of spirituality through Hoodoo. It's an episode where the Beatitudes serve as our moral compass, guiding us through tales of familial bonds, the echoes of ancestors, and the soothing fizz of ginger ale representing our cultural elixirs.
As I sit with my aunt, her wisdom envelops us like the comfort of an old, well-loved armchair. She speaks to the soul of marriage, sharing advice that's as practical as it is profound, like the analogy of toothpaste and words – once out, they can't be taken back. The essence of communication and patience in nurturing a marital bond is underscored. We meander through the joys and tribulations of parenting, from the nerve-wracking first drive lesson to the poignant act of letting go as a child ventures off to college, all while exploring how these rites of passage are moments to cherish and learn from.
Join us for a tapestry of conversations, rich with the threads of cherished memories, the intricate patterns of our ancestry, and reflections on the natural ebbs and flows of life. You'll leave with a heart full of laughter, eyes brimming with tears, and a soul stirred by the profound moments that constitute the legacy of family love. My aunt's life stories are not just tales to be told but lived experiences to be felt, and they await you in this very special episode.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, hi, it's me Mama Q.
I welcome you to Moments in Q.
Let me interview you.
Bonus episode In Q today Hi Yand Tales of Hi Y.
I give you the greeting of theday and I'm explaining the why
of this episode.
Grand Rising.
Today's episode, I interview myaunt.
(00:21):
We stroll down memory lane withher as she explains how she met
her hubby a little over twodecades ago.
Additionally, she talks aboutbeing part of a big family.
The highlights for me was her,my cus and my uncle being owners
of dogs, chickens and goats,whilst having a garden.
She is really about that livingoff the land life.
(00:44):
Notice, I said living off theland, not off the grid.
They still have modern dayamenities, but it's cool to see
and learn about the things Iforgot or my science teacher
didn't teach.
Tell us of these interviews,first and foremost, are for our
ancestors and descendants.
(01:04):
I want to honor their ancestorsand the spiritual practice of
Houdu by talking about ourancestors by name and explaining
what this practice means to us.
Then I want the descendants tolearn more about their family
members in hopes of learningsomething new about our family
to share with future descendants.
In short, a time capsule, ifyou will for all to hear.
(01:25):
Besides, people perk up whenyou talk about them, so that's a
bonus too.
Today's episode is brought toyou by this quote from Matthew 5
, 3 through 10.
The beatitudes he said"'Blessed are the poor in spirit
, for theirs is the kingdom ofheaven.
Blessed are those who mourn,for they will be comfort.
(01:45):
Blessed are the meek, for theywill inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hungerand thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, forthey will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,for they will be called children
of God.
Blessed are those who arepersecuted because of
(02:06):
righteousness, for theirs is thekingdom of heaven'".
["blessed are the Peacemakers"].
Hey, hi, it's me, mama Q.
I welcome you to Moments in Q.
I have another interview today.
Today I am interviewing myauntie.
She is my dad's sister and I'mso excited for this.
(02:27):
You can say hi to the people'saunt.
Hello people, okay, cool, allright.
So I talked to my sisteryesterday which this will
probably premiere sometime in2024, january, because I'm still
on break until February and soI decided to continue talking to
family members and justlearning about life with him.
(02:47):
So again, I'm like super, superexcited and I can't wait for us
to begin you ready.
I guess, Okay cool, so we'regonna do the one more question.
So what superpower do you wishthat you had?
Speaker 2 (03:03):
The superpower that I wish I had is flying, because
I've always wanted to fly, evenas a little girl Used to play
with my brothers, Her dadincluded.
We used to get up, we had abarn like building and we get on
top and we used to put thingson our arms so we could pretend
that we were flying.
So, and I often have dreamsthat all I do is to just kind of
(03:25):
flap my arms and I'm flying andit's just a beautiful feeling,
that's it.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Okay, that's kind of cool.
When I have dreams, I havedreams about me flying too.
So yeah, I can see that.
The next question is what bookshave changed your life the most
?
Speaker 2 (03:44):
What books have changed my life the most?
Oh, you know what?
I'm gonna tell you something?
I'm not gonna say necessarilychange my life, but probably why
I'm the way.
I may have played a part orrole in why I'm the person I am
today, because when I wasgrowing up I used to like
mysteries, hearty boys andwhat's the lady name, nancy Drew
(04:07):
.
Nancy Drew and Hearty BoysMystery.
But when I was a little bitolder I loved Harlequin romance.
So I think, okay for you those,those back in the 80s.
So Harlequin romance would bethe precursor to Hallmark movies
.
Okay, okay, okay, becauseeverything was all night.
Well, no, it didn't actuallystart off as a good relationship
(04:31):
, but there were some kind ofyou know, angst or whatever.
But then the female gottogether with the male and
everything was rosy andbeautiful.
So I think that kind of changedmy life and maybe why I'm a
romantic type person.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Oh, you're hoping it's romantic.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Yes, I believe I am.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Oh, that's cute.
Yeah, when you said Harlequin,I don't know why I was thinking
of Harley Quinn from SuicideSquad, so that's why it kind of
put me on.
No, no, no Harlequin romanceOkay yeah, I just Googled it and
so I think I've seen some ofthem at like Tarjay or something
like that before.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
So I used to read one , just about one, every weekend
problem when I was in highschool.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
Okay, cool.
What's your non-apoholicbeverage of choice, like soda,
tea or coffee, you know?
Yeah, let's see what oh, gingerale.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
I love ginger ale.
Okay, I don't know why, but Iwell, a lot of times with I have
problems with my stomach, upsetstomach or whatever, but ginger
ale, I just like the flavor ofginger ale.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Okay, yeah, when you said that I about ginger ale, I
thought about how it's a thingwithin our black community that
you know I'm not feeling well.
Ginger ale, like ginger ale,and what is that Vicks rub on
your chest is like.
As black people, it seems to belike our go-to medicine for
everything.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
Well, for most it's stomach, ginger ale and voodoo
chips.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Okay, okay, I've seen them in the stores.
Okay, interesting, wait, aren'tthey spicy?
Speaker 2 (05:59):
No, they're more like barbecues.
Barbecue, oh, okay, the kindthat I get.
There's more than one kind.
I think voodoo is the brand,maybe I don't know, but I like
the.
I forgot what it's calledkettle chips.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Oh, okay, I heard of those.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
It's like barbecue, barbecue kettle chips.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Okay cool.
Yeah, Okay, what, oh, not what.
Who was your childhoodcelebrity crush?
Speaker 2 (06:21):
My childhood celebrity crush.
Yeah, just say, let me see mychildhood celebrity crush.
Oh well, football player wasTony Dorsett, because I thought
he was so cute.
I just really love Tony Dorsett.
He was a Dallas Cowboy playerand I don't know, I don't know
(06:43):
anything about football, justlike the way he looked.
And then on the other side ofthe ball was Elvis Presley.
I used to love Elvis Presleymovies growing up and I just I
would just sit in awe and singall the songs with him.
Yeah, that was just me.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Elvis Presley.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Elvis Presley.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
So have you been to the no?
Okay, cause I haven't.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
No, okay, after I.
You know, when I was becameolder, he didn't impress me so
much.
You see, a childhood.
That's why it's so.
Oh, okay, okay, yeah, I got you.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Okay, and I just looked up Tony Dorsett, but I
don't know how old this pictureis.
But yeah, okay.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Let me see.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Oh, that's when he was older.
You need to see him in thisfootball uniform.
Okay, tony, but anyway yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
I'm gonna.
I'm gonna look that up whileI'm asking you the next question
, cause I kind of yeah, okay,okay, like this picture.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
I don't remember him looking like that.
Is that him?
I don't know, but maybe inchildhood he was handsome.
I mean, those pictures are notso much, okay, well, never mind.
When I was a child I did.
I'd love to look at him.
Okay, I did.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
That's cool.
Would you rather live in theocean or on the moon?
Speaker 2 (07:54):
I'm afraid of well, yeah, I am afraid of drowning,
because I can't swim.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
So Neither can.
I the moon, maybe, I don't knowwhy.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Okay, cause I don't want to live in the ocean, so I
guess it's the moon, the moonokay, okay, that's fine.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
The last one more question Would you rather travel
back in time to meet yourancestors or meet your future
descendants?
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Back in time.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Back in time.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
I forgot, cause I often tell them, wonder if I
could meet my mom as a child.
I'd like to kind of watch herand see how she behaved, if we
had anything in common.
Or even go back further to seemy great-grandmother as a child,
and you know, maybe I don'tknow, I don't think I would like
to make it all the way back toslavery.
Yeah, but more so in the past,because if I were to go to the
(08:38):
future, there may be some thingsthat will okay.
If I pick either one, am Isupposed to be able to remember
going there or not?
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Oh, you know what?
Speaker 2 (08:48):
I got this off of Google and so so that's one
reason I wouldn't want to gointo the future, because I feel
like if I can't remember goingbackwards or forward, it would
probably affect the way I livetoday if I were to go forward.
But my past is already overdonewith, so that's why I would do
my past.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
I love how you just like I'm not, no, it's all good.
I love that you just no.
It's making me laugh, cause Ilove how you just dissected that
and in a good way.
In a good way, cause you'relike now would I remember
whatever?
And see, I wasn't even thinkinglike the afterfakes, I was just
thinking like past, future,yeah, no, and stuff.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
But I guess it's not that simple.
Yeah, I'm realizing it's notOkay.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
I can dig it.
I can dig it.
That's cool.
Okay, now we're going to moveinto what I call my moments and
cue questions.
So these are questions that Iask everybody, especially the
first two.
The last two when I was talkingto Tam yesterday, I added these
for her and then I was like youknow what?
I kind of like them and stuff,because the podcast is a mixture
(09:57):
of things, but I definitelytalk about who do and
spirituality a lot.
So I was like, okay, I'mprobably going to start asking
people more questions about that.
So the first one is what is whodo to you?
And of course, it's not a wrongor right answer.
So when you hear the word whodo, what do you think of?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
I've heard of who do, but I don't know what it is.
So actually I don't think aboutwho do, because if you were to
ask me in the last 10 days, 10years, I never gave it a thought
.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Okay, okay, well, that's fine.
Yeah, like I've said before,there's no wrong or right answer
with that, and I usually tellpeople what it is.
And I started thinking likeagain after because I'm
overthinking, a perfectionist,and so I like to do like I call
(10:47):
it A R after actions review ofthe things that I've done to see
on ways to improve it.
And each time I ask thisquestion and of course it's
always not a wrong or rightanswer I sometimes get people
who don't know what it is, whichis fine, and I always give it
like a very surface levelexplanation and it's not bad,
(11:10):
but I don't know.
I kind of wish that I could gointo more details and stuff.
So I guess I will for this time,go into a little bit more
details.
So what do you want to know?
Speaker 2 (11:20):
I mean, I don't go around my I don't, I don't think
about it, so sure you can?
Speaker 1 (11:27):
I mean you can tell me, oh, okay, cool, all right.
So our enslaved Africans beforethey came over to the United
States, they had their ownreligions that they brought with
them, and then, when they camehere to the South, they had to
adapt with what they werepracticing, because some of the
(11:48):
things that they had in WestAfrica they didn't have here and
stuff.
And so one of the tenants thatI always tell people about who
do is, of course, ancestralveneration.
So a person venerates theirancestors by talking to them,
giving them offerings and tryingto heal them, develop a
relationship with them, whetherthey knew them or not, because
(12:12):
even though the word ancestorsmake people think of someone
quote, unquote old or beforetheir time, it could be anybody
that passed away, obviously, andthey can be considered an
ancestor regardless of how oldthey were when they left.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
So, anyway.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
So that's part of it.
But they also used who do as aform of liberation and to deal
with Massa and the stuff thatcomes with that.
So they would use the Bible asa way to like, because that was
the only book that they weresome of them were allowed to
read.
So they would use the Bible asa way to help them use magic,
(12:50):
for defense, and also would useit for medicine and things of
that nature Because, again, evenwhen they were free, they still
were segregated, so theyweren't able to do certain
things.
So it's a lot of like Martinterms that we use, like
herbalism, was it because someof them knew the different types
of herbs to use to help themfeel better?
(13:11):
So it's a mixture of things andpeople practice it different
ways, just like differentdenominations of other religions
and stuff.
Yeah, that's the quote, unquote, short version of it.
Okay, okay.
So next one is name a momentwhere you can.
Okay, so I call things.
You can make this issue up.
Sometimes I'll curse and sayshit, sometimes I won't, just
(13:34):
depends on how I feel.
Um, I prefer ish, ish.
Okay, all right, that's fine.
I can try my best not to cursearound you.
I didn't promise, but yeah, soI call it.
Um, you can't make this issue,and so I came up with this,
because when I learned moreabout my ancestors and continue
(13:54):
to go down this who do path, isjust interesting to me where
there's these things that havehappened to me, that it's like
you can't make this up, like tome there was no denying about
what who do is, and I dounderstand that you don't
practice it, so it doesn't haveto just be with that, but anyway
, it's a time that to you, therewas no denying that God, jesus,
(14:16):
a higher power, whichever wordyou want to use to describe
whomever existed.
Does that make sense or do Ineed?
Speaker 2 (14:23):
to know this Okay.
So for me it would be God, god,jesus.
Oh, it's when I became pregnantwith my son.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Because, you know, before I, before I was pregnant
with my son, I had plenty ofnieces and nephews, siblings,
you know, and it's like I knowpeople got pregnant and had
children.
Speaker 1 (14:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
But when I became pregnant with my child, with my
husband, I thought, wow, that isa beautiful thing, and it was
so beyond not beyondcomprehension.
Okay, it was just like this wasdivine.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
This was God.
This was like God moving.
That's what he made man andwoman together, you know, to
replenish the earth, and I was apart of that.
And just to know that, I fellin love with a man here on earth
and we loved each other and wewere intimate with each other
and out of there grew a child.
(15:22):
Oh, that's like, yeah, thatblows my mind.
Yeah, okay, blows my mind.
And then, when he was in mystomach, and I went.
we go to the God of GYN and tohear his heartbeat that, you
know, like a thunder of horses.
Yeah, it was just.
That was divine too.
I just thought that wasbeautiful and wonderful, okay.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
Yeah, I like that.
So, finally, I did a good jobwith answering the question.
Again, there's never a wronganswer, but, oh my gosh,
whenever I ask people thatquestion, it makes them pause
because they sometimes don't getwhere I'm trying to get it.
But, yeah, you did so, I likethat.
Yes, okay, so I know that yougrew up in the country.
(16:06):
So, growing up in the country,did you learn any type of who do
things?
And I know that you saidearlier that you don't quite
know what who do is so like, forexample, did you learn or hear
about people saying you know yougot to be careful about eating
everyone's spaghetti or becareful about sweeping a
(16:26):
person's feet, or I had dreamedabout someone's pregnant, with
fishes or things?
Speaker 2 (16:30):
like that.
Well, okay, these are thingsthat I heard when I was in
school, not from anybody in myfamily, but to me it was
disgusting.
But about the spaghetti thing,I heard that before you know,
when I was in like middle well,middle school that's what they
call it now but we were stillelementary when I was growing up
.
That thing and the fact of mymother, I didn't you know, but
(16:56):
anyway, every time somebody inour family was pregnant, she
always dreamt.
She dreamt of fish and she saidwho's pregnant?
And most of the time when shetells them a few weeks later we
always found out that somebodywas actually pregnant.
So I didn't know that was partof that, but she, yeah, that.
Speaker 1 (17:14):
Oh, that's cool.
Yeah, there is like when I talkto my maternal grandmother
about this stuff because, asI've told people before on
different episodes, like Ididn't know that I was taught
all these things or learnedabout who do without having a
name to it.
So when I started practicing, Iwould talk to my maternal
(17:37):
grandmother and I would ask hersome things.
Now, of course, if I say who doto her, like most people she
think I'm talking about who doand that freaks her out or
whatever.
But she would do similar thingsas well where she would say, oh
, I had a dream about fish,who's pregnant and stuff and
just all these other differentthings.
And so once I started learningand researching about this, I
(18:00):
was like, okay, so, like growingup, some of us knew and they
call instead of calling who do,which is fine.
They don't quote unquote, haveto call it that, but like old
wives tales and stuff, andthat's so.
If I say that to grandma,she'll give me a whole list of
stuff, but if I call the who do,of course you won't and that's
and that's fine.
But yeah, not everybody hasthat ability of learning those
(18:22):
different things about the fish,the spaghetti and everything
like that that you had mentionedwhich is surprising to me
because we're in the south andwe're in Memphis.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Yeah, but, like you say, we always considered it as
old wives tales or just things,just things.
I'm here and see it.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Yeah, okay, all right , I know what about this?
Speaker 2 (18:42):
your hand itching and get some money, get some money.
Speaker 1 (18:44):
Yeah, that's what they say.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
Well, I don't know my palm, not your palm in your
hand.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Yeah yeah, I've had that happen to me and shown of
money that I wasn't expecting toget came through.
I'm like wait a minute.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
So yeah, my palm is out of town, I don't get any
extra money, but I will.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
I know I'm asking you questions, but do you have any
questions to me about the thingsthat I do, such as Reiki, who
do, etc.
No, okay, cool, no problem.
Okay, now we're going to moveon to family questions.
All right, have you ever lookedinto your family's lineage?
Speaker 2 (19:20):
I have.
I started out with you know,when we have our family reunions
, we normally try to gettogether and talk about our
grandparents and greatgrandparents and so forth.
So and I also do have anancestrycom account which I need
to cancel because I'm payingfor it.
I probably hadn't looked at itin over a year, but I paid my
21.95a month.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
I need to stop it.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Yeah, because I pay minds once a year and it has
gotten expensive, but I love itat the same time.
Your brother, he allowed me tohave access to it, so I have
access to it Now.
He hasn't updated it in amoment, so man, it's probably
(20:07):
more updated than he is.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
You can have access to mine, okay.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Yeah, but it was pretty cool though.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
But I missed it.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Oh no, you're fine, you're fine.
So when I first startedresearching both sides of the
family, I was felt sooverwhelmed, but luckily he had
already had it.
So, yeah, what I mean is his isan updated.
All your siblings are on there,so that's cool.
But of course his children areon there but, like the rest, of
(20:35):
his nieces and nephews aren't,and it's not.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
Yeah, I have.
I've updated our immediatefamily all the way back to my
great.
Well, I want to say at leastgreat, great, maybe great, I
don't know, if great, great ornot, but at least great our
great grandparents and theirchildren.
So because I actually looked atcensus data to find some of
(20:57):
their information, but I think Ispent one Saturday and that's
when I first joined ancestrycom.
Just looking it up, I spent awhole day and I said, oh, this
is good, and then I didn't goback and get back into it.
But I have all the intentionsof doing it.
But yeah, so far.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Well, that's fine.
Uncle saved me a lot of time onthe paternal side.
So I'm on the maternal side andluckily my grandma is still in
her right mind, so she helped meout a lot and I was able to go
very far.
I was able to go to agrandmother having me in great
(21:35):
cities that was born in 1854.
And so I kind of sort of knowher mom's first name sort of,
but there's not that muchinformation and stuff.
And then her husband, and thatone goes very far because I
can't remember how he was.
(21:55):
But that one in particular,that ancestry goes far on the
husband, my grant, thatgrandfather side, because he was
enslaved here in TennesseeTennessee is I like to call it
and somebody else had alreadydid the research for me and I
even know like what plantationhe was on, and yeah, yeah, and
(22:21):
that one is pretty where was itUm degraffin reed plantation?
Speaker 2 (22:29):
Guess what.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
I don't know about the gap.
No, I don't.
But you can share.
But before you do that, thereason I'm glad I'm having this
conversation with you is becauseand it freaks me out, because I
want, I mean, it's too late.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
Now I'm freed up when I tell you by the graph and
read Okay.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
So, um, so this.
So, like I said, this is bydirect lineage on my maternal
side and so that grandmother,who I, which is the highest,
like I said, can go, her maidenname is my last name, and so
it's kind of like wait a minute,because yeah, so, um, we have
(23:06):
okay, so so obviously that'sfrom the husband, and so that
husband, like I said from, cango up or whatever, and we found
out what plantation he was on,okay.
So then the second thing is umthe family, the part of the
family that have that annual umfamily tree.
I joined their Facebook groupand I asked them what plantation
(23:28):
was that part of the familyfrom?
But they didn't say to graphand read.
Because in my mind it's likehow I got my last name from my
dad, but my ancestry, like I'mlike, oh, my gosh, are we can,
like it was so weird.
So blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, your turn.
Speaker 2 (23:42):
Well, there is someone in your life who we
spoke about earlier today.
Yeah, dad told me about that.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Oh man, I thought you were about to tell yeah yeah,
dad told me that that person.
That's interesting oh yeah,Same thing he said and I was
like, but that was a maiden name, but I thought it was like.
I thought he was going to likeshare something bigger than that
, no, when I was maiden, I mean.
I'm starting to know the firsthusband.
Yeah, yeah that's yeah, that'swhat he told me and he was like
that's interesting.
I was like yeah, okay, but Iwas hoping for a little bit more
(24:10):
.
But the interesting part whereI thought that maybe our
lineages had crossed is because,um, the graph read plantation
was around Mason, tennessee, andyou know one question was that
excuse me, tennessee, is thatlike no, I'm so sorry, okay.
(24:30):
So whenever I say Tennessee, yousaid, instead of saying
Tennessee, I say Tennesseebecause it's slang or whatever.
They say 10 a key because itdeals with it.
It's okay, it's okay so yeah,whenever.
I say 10 a key.
Oh, that's just me sayingTennessee or whatever, instead
of saying Tennessee, just rollwith it.
Oh, okay, but yeah, so um, andbecause I know what, um, what
(24:53):
city y'all grew up in?
or whatever it just made mewonder did our um ancestry cross
lines?
But, like I said, when theytold us what part of that
particular family tree onplantation was from, I was just
like oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
Somebody gave me some information I don't even know
what I did with it About fromyou know well, probably the
family reunion you werereferring to.
Yeah, he gave us someinformation this past family
reunion, but what did I do withit, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
Oh, yeah, I don't know this.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
More detail.
Speaker 1 (25:30):
Yeah, yeah, let me know, because it's always been
interesting to me to find outwhere I came from.
Um, and my great grandmotherwas born Well, we don't know if
she really was, because I can'tfind a birth certificate, but I
understand, because she was bornin early 1900s they wouldn't
have one.
But, um, I always wanted toknow all of these things or
whatever.
And, and um, she was born wethink 1915 and died 2005.
(25:55):
And before she died, uh, her,her, um, yeah, she wasn't there,
so her memory was, was bad.
So that's why I'm happy andgrateful and thankful that my
grandma can help me, um, but shecan't help me too much because,
um, she has still has her goodmemory, so she's been helpful
with certain things that I say.
She's like I don't rememberthat.
So, yeah, you want me to go tothe next question?
(26:18):
Sure, oh, okay, um, you almostkind of answered it, but that's
okay.
Um, do you know anything aboutour ancestry that you want to
share?
Speaker 2 (26:27):
Uh, no more than what I was about to tell you that I
learned about and I just well, Iwas told about it and it didn't
stay up in my head.
But I have something on somepaper but I don't know what I
did with it.
I can't remember what I didwith it.
I'll.
I'll let you know, but I can.
I can tell you somebody's nameand give that person's number.
(26:47):
They probably love they wouldtalk your ear off, oh sweet.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (26:51):
That would be.
That would be even like um ooh,third or fourth cousin.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Oh, okay, okay.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
That'd be cool.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
Yeah, Cause, um again , since, um, your brother helped
me out or whatever, and um, Ilooked up the names and stuff
and I thought that was prettycool, but um, I'm still more so
again curious If at any time ourancestors crossed path just
because of the location theywere from, and then my side come
(27:24):
into Memphis and your sidestand in the countryside just
out.
There was interesting.
And of course, the last name,so you know.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
But our family grew.
Our family lived in FayetteCounty.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
Yeah, that's in Fayette County, mason, tennessee
, mason is Fayette.
County.
It was nice it's not anymoreMason Fayette County.
Ugh Uh, Google's about to tellme I thought it was.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
I thought it was something else, like Covington,
the same as Covington.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I apologize.
Yes, you're right, tiptonCounty.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
Yeah, tipton.
Speaker 1 (27:55):
I don't know why.
I thought it was Fayette County.
Oh, oh, okay, okay, okay, mybad, yeah, one of them.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Yeah, but they're still close.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:05):
One of them was um huh, okay, I don't know why I
keep having Fayette.
I mean, I know our family'sfrom Fayette County, but I don't
know why I kept thinking I will, okay, that's fine, no biggie,
okay, um, how was life for yougrowing up?
Speaker 2 (28:19):
How was life for me growing up?
It was, um, we were very poor.
We had our necessities and nota lot of extras, but we, I feel
like we had.
What a lot of kids have don'thave today is they have a lot of
that external material thingsand don't have.
I feel like I had a lot of love, a lot of companionship.
(28:41):
Um, I just, I think I, Ienjoyed my childhood playing
with your dad.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:48):
The last three of us that we, we had Native American
names growing up.
Did he ever tell you about that?
No, I was Pocahontas, okay.
He was sitting bull, okay.
And our baby brother wasPontiac.
And these are all NativeAmerican names.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Okay.
And your baby brother?
Is that the one?
Y'all born in the same month?
That one, yes, okay, yes babybrother.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
So, yeah, so we used to play.
I mean I enjoyed my childhoodand I, I mean I knew, I knew
there are a lot of things thatmaybe we didn't have, that a lot
of other people did have.
But, like I said to me, we hadthings that were important, like
we had parents that loved usand we had each other and we
loved each other.
Of course, we, you know, we didthe same, we fought and we
called each other names andthings like that, and we, you
(29:33):
know, made fun of our olderneighbors and things like that
and so.
But I feel like I had a goodchildhood growing up and I'm
thankful for myself.
I was very thankful.
Speaker 1 (29:42):
Okay, so it's a lot of y'all.
You are number 11 out of 11.
Oh my goodness, yes, how wasthat?
And with the first one openlike okay, so okay, the first
one.
What's?
What's the age differencebetween?
Speaker 2 (29:59):
So the first one today is 71 and I am 57.
Okay.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
I'm about to do the math for that one real quick 71
minus 57.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
So my mother was pregnant.
My mother was probably pregnant, if not every year, every other
year.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
So at the time she was 25 to about 35.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Okay, something like that.
Okay, so, with the eldest being14 years older than you, were
y'all close growing up?
Speaker 2 (30:38):
No, because actually what happened was my mom.
We don't share the same day.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
Oh, that one.
Oh my gosh, I was thinkingabout the oldest sister, the
first one I was.
Speaker 2 (30:52):
I was my oldest sister is like number four Is my
oldest brother.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
I'm.
I'll cut it out in a moment.
Wait, y'all.
Y'all about to hear atransition and you will be okay,
because I have to figure outwhich person we're talking about
.
You'll be all right, okay, sowe're back, so I have to redo my
question again.
So you're the first.
The first baby that's 14 yearsolder than you is the eldest
(31:23):
baby boy so growing up.
Because of the 14 yeardifference, y'all weren't close.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
And no, it's not because of.
Well, of course we weren'tclose, because he was much older
and plus, he lived with mygrandmother and Memphis growing
up yeah, he didn't grow up withus.
He visited a lot and spent alot of time with us because back
then when my mother and dad gotmarried, when they got married,
(31:51):
they were living in I want tosay they said in my
grandmother's parents' home orsomething.
And you know, sometimes backthen things, those you know what
they would may have calledoutside children.
I don't know if they probablydidn't call it that then, but
because he was from another manthat he ended up staying with my
(32:11):
grandmother and he was raisedby my grandmother in another in
the city.
Speaker 1 (32:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
I never knew that because, like during the pause,
that they'll never hear.
Like I said, I thought thefourth one was the oldest.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
The fourth one always act like that the oldest female
.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
Yeah, yeah, yeah I'm not the oldest yeah.
I always yeah, I totally forgotabout him.
Okay, Okay, so with, okay, sowith all of y'all, with the age
difference, y'all were still, orwere you?
Just I hate to make it soundlike you were more closer than
one than the other, but I guesswhat I'm trying to say is
(32:50):
despite the age differences, howwas that?
There we go.
Speaker 2 (32:53):
Because of the, because of the age differences,
it was almost like we were maybeI don't want to say three
family maybe it was three likethe older group, the middle
group and the youngest group, soit was almost like we were
three separate little families.
Speaker 1 (33:07):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Because my older I don't remember.
I remember my oldest sisterbecause she went.
She went to.
I remember her best becausewhenever my our parents were
going somewhere, she was alwaysleft in charge of us, so
therefore she's always been likewe call her system.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Yeah, system of her, because she was always in charge
of us when, when our parentswent around.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
And so that lasted till today.
Yeah, yeah.
And so you know, as we gotolder, you know we learned each
other.
We learned more about eachother, but growing up I was
closer to your dad.
Okay, the last three of us.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
I think I would say the last three of us were closer
growing up because we werecloser in age.
Yeah, and you know when you're,you are a what we call it now
the tweens, or a child.
You don't really hang out orassociate yourself with the
teenagers and older.
So because we were, you know,two years apart, yeah, so we
(34:13):
were two years between all of us, right, 81, yeah, 81, 83 and 85
.
Yeah, so, yeah, so, since wewere closer in age, then we were
closer because we grew upplaying together.
Yeah, like I said, pocahontas,honeyack and Sit and Bull, yeah,
okay.
Speaker 1 (34:32):
That's cool.
I didn't, yeah, I asked.
I asked that question initiallybecause as my sister and I are
14 years 14 years apart and sowe didn't really grow up around
each other until, like, webecame adults, and then we got a
(34:53):
little closer and we're closernow, so that's why.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
I was just wondering wasn't like?
Speaker 1 (34:56):
that, so it's the same, okay, cool.
So what are the lessons orvalues from your childhood that
you still carry with you today?
Speaker 2 (35:06):
I don't think to appreciate family to that.
It's not so much about materialthings that you have, it's
about the love you can sharewith people.
You know it's not things, it'sinanimate things.
Like I said love and sharingand just being kind to each
(35:28):
other.
You know we're not gonna alwaysagree with each other, don't?
We know that we're not gonnaalways agree, but we can get
along, we can talk and state ourdifferences but still remain
family and respectful towardeach other.
That's what I say, you know.
That's my thing is that thethings that I like, I think,
(35:51):
things that I live by, we don'thave to agree with each other,
but we can show kindness to eachother still.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
I think I learned that from Mama.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
Okay, what was one of your fondest memories as a kid?
Speaker 2 (36:05):
My fondest playing with your brother.
I mean your dad playing withyour dad and my brother just
growing up with them.
My friends, my best friends Areyou all still best friends now
Not so I mean, I wouldn't sayfriends.
It's almost like this withchildren.
(36:28):
The saying goes your daughter'syour daughter all her life.
Your son's your son until hetakes a wife.
So my brother's my brother untilhe takes my wife, takes a wife
Because it seemed like when theycan't, they couldn't be my best
friend because they had theirown best friend and her mates.
(36:48):
I guess.
Oh, okay, that's the way I seeit, and so I think I would think
of my sisters more so as mybest friends.
But it's still not.
It doesn't take away from ourrelationship, but it was almost
like when they both got marriedthat it was kind of it was
different.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
Like the whole thing.
What cleave to your wife orsomething.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
Oh, okay, gotcha Okay .
Speaker 1 (37:11):
Were there any family traditions that you looked
forward to every year as a child, or, you can say, as an adult,
it doesn't matter which one.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
Same as a child in adulthood was Christmas time
because, like I said, there wasalways so many of us that we
didn't get a lot of extra things.
But at Christmas time we alwaysgot a little extras and we were
able to put our tree up and wehad our little boxes.
Where we had, we would takeshoe boxes and decorate them and
the next morning we wouldalways have our fruit, our candy
(37:43):
and we have our gifts Fruit,candy and nuts and gifts.
So it was always Christmas time.
Maybe that's why I loveChristmas to this day and I feel
like, even if I still have myson, he does come home for
Christmas.
I would decorate and I toldpeople that I work with that.
It's not for anybody.
(38:05):
No it's just, it's for me, it'sfor you.
I decorate for me because itmakes me happy.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Okay, do you have a favorite tradition that you have
just with my uncle and your son, or is it just still with the
whole Christmas thing?
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Well, that's part of Christmas.
Well, I just like.
I like our relationship,because sometimes we get
together just sit on the sofaand watch movies together.
So that's kind of a traditionalthing, for especially since
he's older and not living withus anymore, and sometimes he'll
come in the bed with us likewe're at the top of the bed,
(38:41):
he'll be at the bottom, and oneyear and I can remember this
very well, I don't know weplayed some game about songs.
We were just playing songs andsinging.
And just family time and beingtogether and just enjoying each
other's company.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
Okay, yeah, all right .
So, as you and I know,obviously most of your siblings
joined the military.
Did you like what you did, sodid you not want to join the
military and be with?
I mean, again, it's not a rightor wrong answer, but I just
find it interesting.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Well, I did take the As-Val and I could have joined
in the branch of the servicethat I wanted, but I think I was
too much of a mama's girl.
I love my mom and even after Igot married, when I would come
home for Christmas, I get to bewith my mama and spoon get in
(39:32):
her book.
Yeah, that's the best feelingin the world.
Well, it is one of the bestfeelings in the world for me,
and so I think, maybe because Iwas too much of a mama's girl.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
I was my mama's baby forever.
Forever.
Because even when I was ateenager, I didn't want to be
known as a baby.
Because she said you'll alwaysbe my baby.
I'm like roll my ass back tothe back of my head.
Yeah, oh, yeah but as I got anolder, I learned to love that,
and I would, even after I had mychild.
She'd be holding my child andI'd be right up on her too.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Oh, that's sweet Until the end, yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
Yeah, so You've always tried to be a peacemaker
and, as you know, it drives mebanana, but it's you.
Is there a specific reason asto you wanting peace in the
family despite all of ourdifferences?
Speaker 2 (40:22):
Why not?
Why not?
I just feel like we kind oftalked about this earlier.
For me, it's like everybody inthis world is different and I
don't say that I will get alongwith everybody and I will agree
with what everybody does, be itfamily or not family, but as
(40:45):
long as it's not hurting me orhurting someone else, to forgive
.
I think it's.
For me it's because I don'tever want to live with regret,
because life is short on thisside, and I want to, I want to
be able to say that I I can'tremember the saying.
(41:06):
It's something that I thinkthat your brother used to say,
because he used to do the MartinLuther King speeches all the
time.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
You mean your brother .
Speaker 2 (41:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:18):
I keep following in your brother.
It's okay, I'm good You're deadwhen I say your brother, I mean
you're dead.
Speaker 2 (41:24):
Yeah, martin Luther King has a speech.
I think it says does it havesomething?
Does it say something aboutbeing a drum major for peace?
A drum major.
What is a drum major speechabout?
Speaker 1 (41:37):
Oh, let me see MLK drum major speech.
Oh gosh, um, he says somethingabout the drum major instinct
and the desire to be first, tobe recognized and to receive
distinction.
Speaker 2 (41:52):
Or maybe I just know.
Maybe, maybe there's some,maybe I'm confused with
something else.
Speaker 1 (41:56):
I found a quote.
It says we all have the drummajor instinct.
We all want to be important, tosuppress others, to achieve
distinction, to learn the parade, and the great issue of life is
to harness the drum majorinstinct.
Speaker 2 (42:09):
is a good instinct If you don't disorder and
perverted maybe there's not, butanyway no, no that may not be
it, I may have I may be quotingit wrong, but anyway.
But for me it's just.
It's just.
When someone would ask me whybe a peacemaker, my question
would be why not?
Yeah because there being apeacemaker to me is not being
(42:32):
harmful to anybody.
It's just that you know, youjust accept people for who they
are.
When people, as the saying goes, when people show you who they
are, believe it and let them be.
Yeah, and we don't have toagree with everything that they
do, but we should be able tojust let them be, and they
should.
Maybe let me be.
And to me.
I mean, you know, that's justthe way, that's just right.
Speaker 1 (42:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:58):
Okay, my eyes just right to be a peacemaker.
Speaker 1 (43:00):
Okay, yeah, I got you All right.
This one's going to beinteresting, as.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
I can make it here Blessed are the peacemakers for
theirs, as to what the kingdom,god or heaven or something like
that.
Blessed are the blessed are thepeacemakers, oh the attitudes.
Speaker 1 (43:14):
Oh oh, I remember.
I remember the beatitudes fromcollege, but I don't remember
the rest of it.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
Yeah, wasn't really big enough by growing up.
Yeah, yeah, okay, this is theone.
I'm excited to hear your answer.
What is the most fun memory youand I have had during our
family relationship?
And oh my gosh, please don'ttalk about me singing that song
that you always like.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
It is that song.
I just, I was been thinkingabout that song all day but I
just, I just like you as alittle girl because you were
just, you were always to me.
You were just so smart and youalways wanted to to me learn
things.
And you just the cutest littlething.
Speaker 1 (43:53):
Your mom used to dress you so cute and you just
All of them, pigtails in my hand, I know, and you couldn't get
dirty.
Speaker 2 (43:59):
But I mean, you know she, you know I, just, I don't
know you, just a little, alittle sweet little girl and
always was inquisitive,pretending like you're reading
newspaper, even though it wasupside down.
You know you just, yeah, youjust Incerezen.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
Yeah, I don't you always tease me about that one
and I'm never offended, but I donot remember this song.
I know the song it was byLeverte.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
Oh my goodness, A song was a song by Leverte which
which like the dad.
Leverte the group, oh the group.
Oh, Rick Leverte, Dang it.
Oh something to do with Name.
Some of the first major songs Idon't have a Leverte group
songs.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
Okay, google, do you remember at least what year I
did this, how, what?
Speaker 2 (44:49):
year were you.
Speaker 1 (44:49):
I'm a 83.
All right, so here comes myforever love, 1987.
Pop goes my mind, 1986.
Casanova, yeah.
Speaker 2 (45:00):
You didn't say Casanova.
You used to say cast, cast andover, casting over.
Yeah, that was it, casting over.
Speaker 1 (45:10):
That's funny.
You said that because I wasthat song.
Wow, okay, I do kind of likethat song.
I would always like laugh andhearing it now as an adult, but
it never dawn on.
Okay, yeah.
Speaker 2 (45:20):
You didn't say Casanova, you said cast, cast
and over, casting over.
Speaker 1 (45:26):
Okay, we're going to move into relationship questions
.
Whoop, whoop.
Okay.
How did you meet uncle, whichis your husband?
Speaker 2 (45:35):
I used to.
I met senior.
I call him senior.
Speaker 1 (45:37):
Yeah, we actually call him dad, but yeah, for this
one, yeah, we're all.
We're all with senior.
Speaker 2 (45:43):
Okay, whatever.
Yeah, I call him dad too.
Yes, um, one Friday evening, myroommate uh, I had a roommate
at the time was I had tworoommates actually but one of my
roommates had just gotten offfrom work and she was like oh so
you know, I'm so tired fromwork, but she wanted to go out
and have fun and I didn't wantto go anywhere.
I wanted to stay home.
(46:04):
Mm, hmm, like I do, I love myhome.
Wherever I live, I've alwaysloved it, but I wanted to be
home.
She's like no, let's go out.
So that's why I met him.
We went out in the in afterhours play.
So I guess you say, uh, what do?
you call that the club.
It wasn't actually a club.
Speaker 1 (46:19):
Well, happy happy hour, oh, happy hour, okay yeah.
Speaker 2 (46:22):
I met him happy hour.
Speaker 1 (46:24):
Okay, and how long did y'all date?
Speaker 2 (46:27):
We dated from how long date before we got married
and became engaged?
Oh oh, we dated two years.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
Y'all dated two years , got engaged.
Speaker 2 (46:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:41):
And then yeah, Okay, and um yeah, okay.
And they didn't, and dating him.
What was your typical dateslike?
Speaker 2 (46:52):
Um, a lot of times we would go out to dinner, okay.
A lot of go for walks Okay,because where he live, well, he
lived by a golf course.
Okay, we walk around the golfcourse.
I remember one particular.
Speaker 1 (47:05):
Oh, those apartments, I remember them, yeah, yeah,
yeah.
Or condos, or whatever, Iremember them, okay, yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
And we walk around that golf course, cold and stuff
, so we go to picnics and apart,uh, things like that.
Speaker 1 (47:19):
Okay, wait, let me see.
So y'all been married for 31years 31 years.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
So that means wait so that, wait, you were around
when we were dating because ofone another.
Yeah, I tell you, I tell youAnother memory I had was I had
told your mom that I wouldbabysit you, mm-hmm, and we
would went over to his where hewas living in the, in the
convenience, and, uh, you know,you were just, you were there
with us.
(47:45):
And you know I was like we were,that was in the early years or
early months, probably, uh-huh,and you can't say oh, yeah.
You said, oh, I'm sorry, youused to call me Aunt Weija,
weija, something like that.
I want to go home on Weija.
So well, that's another one ofmy memories, but yeah.
Speaker 1 (48:07):
Oh wait Did I get married.
Speaker 2 (48:09):
We didn't have a wedding.
Oh, we didn't have a wedding.
We got married to courthouse.
Oh, okay, because I actuallywent out with one of my friends,
one of my best friends at thetime Uh-huh, we went looking for
when we decided, you know, hehad proposed and we decided we
were getting married.
We went looking for a weddingdress, mm-hmm, and I got a
headache and I said no, I don'twant to go through this.
(48:32):
Uh-huh, because I'm introvertedand I didn't want to be the
center of attention.
Okay, so I just wanted to makeit legal because we lived
together before we got married.
Okay, and I just wanted legaland I wanted to be right inside
of God.
Okay, so we went down to thecourthouse and I was the
happiest person in life.
Speaker 1 (48:50):
Oh, and how did you?
We were married.
And how did you know he was theone?
Speaker 2 (48:54):
How did I know he was the one I don't remember?
Oh, okay, I just remember himbeing because number one.
When I was sick, he brought mesoup whenever I needed.
When I got ready to move, hewas always there for me.
When in a crunch, oh, and evenwhen it wasn't a crunch, he was
(49:16):
always there for me.
He was just a good person.
He was just, you know, he wasjust good to me.
That's so sweet.
Yeah, it was good to me andgood for me.
Speaker 1 (49:28):
Okay, so we all have been married for 31 years.
I'm sure the relationship hasevolved over time.
We have any advice orsuggestions for married couples
as their marriage evolved?
Speaker 2 (49:41):
Yes, don't, even though I love Harlequin romance
and I remember romantic personand I love Hallmark movies, but
life is not a Hallmark.
It is not, definitely not.
There are gonna be days whereyou, you'll always love your
mate, at least this person, atleast I will, yeah, at least I
(50:02):
will always, yeah, my person,but I won't.
Some days you may not like them.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Yeah, not that you don't like,like them, you just.
You don't get upset, yeah.
So my thing is, when you it'slike I saw something on Facebook
one time and this is one thingI you have to live by mm-hmm, is
(50:26):
that the toothpaste?
And the two, the two, the twotoothpaste?
Okay, your words are thetoothpaste.
When you get a tube oftoothpaste and you just press it
out, yeah, yeah try to put itback in.
Speaker 1 (50:39):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (50:39):
Yeah, you can do that .
So, yeah, my thing is to watchyour words, don't?
And for me it was before ISpeak.
What a footage part.
Where was I?
Speaker 1 (50:53):
He lost um.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
Talking about the two with two things and you can't
get the words out.
Speaker 1 (50:59):
Oh, and you say it for you.
You try to be careful with yourwords.
Speaker 2 (51:02):
Yeah, and when I feel like I can't be careful with my
words, have to be quiet for awhile, so we'll retreat into
different rooms, okay, and we'llbe quiet Until we'll come down,
and then you get together andyou talk and discuss things out,
so that way you won't saythings that you like the two
with two pages.
Yeah try to put back in it.
Yeah, because once those wordsare out, you can't put them, you
(51:25):
can't take them back.
You can apologize for them.
Yeah, but there was some peopleit was stick with them.
So you don't want to, you wantto cause it in memory like yeah,
you know, that's me.
Speaker 1 (51:37):
Well, that's what I do with, with, with our family.
You know I know what I'm aboutto say when I say it and you
know I stand on business.
All right, so you're You'repart of the Weedon boys Cowboys
fans.
Was it mandatory or optional tobe a Cowboys family when you
got with uncle?
Speaker 2 (51:55):
When I got with uncle I was already done, boys.
Speaker 1 (51:59):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (52:00):
Them boys in quote.
Speaker 1 (52:01):
Yeah, no finger quotes.
Speaker 2 (52:03):
Yeah, I never really was a football.
I Didn't follow football, Ijust do some.
I knew players.
Yeah and for, I guess becausein the house that I grew up in
most people like I guess it wasmy whole family, like the Dallas
Cowboys Before I met on yeah,before this I saw stragglers.
Speaker 1 (52:22):
Oh, dad talk about it all time.
Speaker 2 (52:23):
Well, she didn't, she didn't like football.
That okay, when she was in thehouse with us.
Uh-huh, that was something shedeveloped afterwards.
Okay, the reason I asked thatquestion she used to be actually
used to be a WashingtonRedskins fan.
Speaker 1 (52:39):
okay, now, whether they're Washington, I think the
commanders or something yeah thereason I asked that is because
when I got with my boo thing,love of my life, the one of the
first things he asked me waslike what's your favorite
Football team?
And I was like I don't have one.
I like college football.
Well, I said I like college.
Well, first of all, I don'tlike sports period.
(53:01):
And if I had to pick a Favoriteor whatever, it would be my
alma mater and that's collegeand stuff.
And he was like, okay, so nowyou're a Cowboys fan.
And I'm like, okay, so now I'mpart of the Weedham boys.
Um, last year for Thanksgivingwe went to our first
professional football game inperson ever.
We drove to see the Cowboysagainst the New York Giants and
(53:24):
I am so happy that the New YorkGiants won because I was like if
they did not win, I know that Iwould have to hear that or
whatever.
So I'm like you.
I I'm not real big on sports orwhatever, but I do definitely
make sure that I have my Cowboyssweatpants that I stole from
him that belongs to him, butthey're mine now and I have my
cowboy hat and I have my owncowboy shirt and stuff because I
(53:48):
had about new outfits so I canbe part of the Weedham boys or
whatever, but I I root for themand I look at the game.
Speaker 2 (53:54):
But like I'm just not big on sports, neither Real,
but we went to our first livegame last year Uh-huh matter of
fact, this time of year, becauseit was a was?
Speaker 1 (54:04):
it was a cowboy.
Speaker 2 (54:05):
Yes, and guess what the Cowboys won?
Speaker 1 (54:09):
Let me tell you, I guess, oh my gosh, yeah, because
um, they won, yeah, so that'sgood.
Speaker 2 (54:15):
Well, I say we, they went because the men went to the
game.
Uh-huh, the latest date outsidetailgating.
Speaker 1 (54:21):
Oh, okay, okay, that's fine.
Yeah, um cuz.
What was was earlier this weekthe cow, oh my gosh.
So, yeah, cowboys um laws.
Who did we go against?
The dolphins, I think.
And, oh my goodness, I hadhorrible.
Yeah, I had to hear about itand he is.
Speaker 2 (54:36):
Right at the end.
Speaker 1 (54:37):
Yeah, he's so frustrated cuz again I'm just
there for support whenever thegame is on, I'll just like sit
next to him and I'll look at itor I, or I'll go to sleep or
whatever.
Because again, yeah, yeah, cuzI mean I look again, I'll look
at it and I know the very basicscuz he taught me.
But like any of the what, thefouls or whatever, when they do
the yellow flag I know none ofthat stuff is going on.
(54:59):
So, but I just I know when atouchdown comes exactly, and I
just know when to cheer for theCowboys.
And people send me Memes and I'mlike y'all, I'm a fan, but I'm
not a fan like that for y'all tobe sending me these memes, for
me to get offended.
Speaker 2 (55:12):
I.
Speaker 1 (55:12):
Because of him like yeah so same here.
Speaker 2 (55:16):
Yeah, I really I Don't really care for football,
yeah so we have not we?
Speaker 1 (55:22):
I'm sorry I have a few more questions.
I put this under personal orwhatever, but they're still
interesting.
So I told my me to me that Iwas on my way to your house and
she had told me that you hadchickens and of course I'm
laughing at her because I don'tbelieve her, but she was like
for real, you do.
And so when I got here andlaughed about the whole chickens
, I learned that you also havebeagles, goats and a garden.
(55:43):
So y'all have like a smalllittle was zoo or whatnot around
here.
How did they come about?
Speaker 2 (55:50):
My husband is all.
That was all for my husband,because I grew up where I'm
around here today.
It's about two or three milesfrom where I was born.
I was born at home, by the way.
Did you know?
All of us were born at home.
No, that didn't tell me all ofus were born by at home, and our
grandmother, my paternalgrandmother, was a midwife and
she delivered.
All of us in plus two, twonieces.
Speaker 1 (56:11):
Oh, okay, the, the, the great grandmother that I had
.
They lived in Memphis.
Is that maternal, paternal?
Speaker 2 (56:22):
That's your maternal.
Oh, okay, so I don't think I'vemet Uh no, you didn't, because
I was 12, okay, I was 12 whenshe passed away.
Oh, okay, okay, so she was amidwife?
Speaker 1 (56:36):
Yeah, that is so cool , yeah, so okay, but I guess
that would make sense because,oh, this is gonna sound so
ignorant, but I'm actually waylike it's a.
It's a small city.
We consider that the country,so like did y'all have to go,
like to the city for ourhospitals or whatever?
So was that one of the reasonsthat y'all were born in the
house, or just worked out thatway?
You know what?
Speaker 2 (56:58):
it's not a big deal, no, it's probably because you
know, she delivered all thebabies and took care of all the
babies.
Oh, there's a midwife, and sothat's what people did, most of
most of the black people that Iknew, uh-huh, in the country In
front where we grew up.
Yeah, we're born at home.
Okay, I think, okay, maybe.
Speaker 1 (57:18):
I don't?
Speaker 2 (57:19):
I think so.
Yeah, cuz I even met someonewhen I went to University of
Memphis, mm-hmm, who we werejust talking.
We were talking about what wewere from.
You know how you?
Just talk about your family andI found out that she delivered
her.
Oh, she was my residentassistant, mm-hmm, at the
dormitory where I lived, yeah,in the University of Memphis.
My grandmother had deliveredher and her siblings.
Speaker 1 (57:42):
But the question was oh, the, the Beagles, goats,
chickens in garden, you know.
Speaker 2 (57:48):
I was saying, yeah, his mate, I'm his mate Because,
like I said, I grew up in thecountry and I knew what it was
like, but he grew up in the city, uh-huh, but his goal, his goal
(58:09):
and his dream was always tohave a little piece of land.
Okay, call his own.
And so that's what we are rightnow.
So these are things I Neverwould have thought about.
Half the things that he thoughtabout, yeah, you know, because
I'm like I lived here before, Iknow, but no, apparently he knew
a lot more than I did, and sowe had the chickens for, and you
(58:29):
know, we did just for eggs, andjust because I think my husband
likes To think of himself as afarmer, I mean a mini farmer,
yeah, I know, and I just supporthim as the end way I can, and I
just, you know, he Plants and Ihave him plant.
You know he Teals a man and thegarden and I haven't planted it
(58:52):
and I picked some things andyou know what was the?
The veggies and things grow.
Yeah, we'll go out theretogether.
Yeah, go out there alone, andit's just nice, it's just nice
to be outside.
Speaker 1 (59:04):
Yeah, I, um, I I think I told you I can't miss
not a big deal.
Well, yeah, I had a help gardenand other things that I grew
because hemp is legal inTenaquil.
So my first Season they made it, but unfortunately we had a
cold front and killed them andstuff.
And then Last year I think Idid them too late or something's
(59:27):
wrong with my soul, I don'tknow what I did not a big deal
with.
Like, I like gardening as well.
I grew okra they didn't make itbut they were growing and I
grew basil.
That actually made it and stuff.
And for the first time I feelsilly amending it, but for the
first time I had basil off theleaf and that was pretty cool.
So, um, my mini me got me intogardening.
(59:49):
Um, she was an elementary andwas like, hey, mom, let me tell
you about germination.
I'm like okay, oh, we shouldplant something.
I'm like all right, so westarted planting flowers at the
woman they gave birth to mehouse and then, when her and
when many me and I moved intowhere we're in now, since it's
my space or whatever, becauseit's a, it's a town home, but I
(01:00:12):
mean it's it's my house, I'm notan apartment.
So anyway, um, I startedgrowing, but by that time she
didn't want to participateanymore.
But I found fun and growing aof Flowers and herbs and
hopefully one day I'll do betterwith it, but I don't know.
It's just relaxing and fun.
Speaker 2 (01:00:29):
So yeah, that's one about husband feels about it too
.
Yeah but it's just really great.
You know, I guess sometimes Imay take things for granted, but
you know, sometimes when youneed something, I need a bell
pepper yeah, summertime I justgo outside and pick it up.
You know, yeah, my garden pickthe bell pepper.
Yeah, tomato, need a tomato.
Go to my garden pick a tomato.
And I don't I don't necessarilylike okra, but they grew we got
(01:00:52):
the most Oprah this year thatwe've ever had and they grew and
grew and grew and grew and grewyeah, yeah, I was plenty of
okra.
Speaker 1 (01:01:00):
I don't care too much for okra, I just wanted to grow
it and I did it at the wrongtime because we caught a heat
wave, I want to say last yearand, um, yeah, nothing came from
it.
But I don't, I'm not.
I might be done with the hemp.
We'll see how I feel, but I'mnot done gardening.
Um, again, I I do want to do itfor the food and stuff like
that, but I still find fun In init.
(01:01:22):
So it's not a big deal.
So, um, two more questions andwe'll be done.
This one is this one is talkingabout Adult children.
So you and I both have onechild.
Clearly, my cousin is a man andhe's older than my mini me.
How did you handle your onlychild transitioning from a young
teen to a young man?
Speaker 2 (01:01:45):
I cried a lot, okay, no, actually when he was growing
up in the house, everything wasfine prayer, prayer and crying.
Because I Remember him when hefirst got his license, yeah,
when he first started trying todrive.
Yeah and we would be.
I will let him drive the churchbecause I was like you know,
(01:02:05):
every Sunday I'll get in the carwith him and I would literally
Not just, I will literally besick.
Speaker 1 (01:02:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:02:12):
I have to go to the ladies room and I got to the
church literally Cuz my stomachwas so cramped and you know, my
dad, my dad, his dad Uh-huh,took him out at night and did
the, you know, the base trainingfor him to drive.
Yeah, but to give him drivingexperience.
I roll with him.
You just have to have.
Speaker 1 (01:02:33):
I'm going through that now.
Speaker 2 (01:02:36):
Yeah, prayer, prayer, prayer yeah, okay.
I don't, I don't want to evergo back to that feeling.
That feeling was horrible, yeah, horrible.
Yeah, I'm going through thatand then, when he graduated from
high school yeah, and got, wetook him to college, got him
settled in at his dorm room andwe hugged him goodbye.
And man, I cried this day, Icried August.
(01:03:02):
The sea was August 17th 2017.
Wow and I cried, and I cried,and I cried some more.
Uh-huh and then I thought aboutit.
I was like he's not going offto war.
Yeah, he's not he's not goingto jail right.
This is a good thing.
Speaker 1 (01:03:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:03:22):
And then you cry get that crying and I did, but then
it got.
You know I'm about you kind ofgot used to him being away.
Yeah and you let it go.
Yeah, and I kind of just let itgo until he came home again For
Christmas break, and then I hadto let him go again, but I
didn't cry quite as long thattime.
Yeah, and so each time you know.
Speaker 1 (01:03:45):
The last question is how do you like to spend your
free time?
Speaker 2 (01:03:48):
How did I like to spend my free time?
I like to spend my free timeJust being with nature, I guess
being outside.
I take walks outside, I like to.
I'm in an exercise program now,mm-hmm.
So even though I don't, whileI'm doing it, I don't
necessarily like to just look atnature, look out my window and
(01:04:10):
just watch.
You know birds and I've seen alot of different birds that I've
never seen in Almost 30, somemy years and watching the
animals Outside just do whatthey do, naturally.
Yeah, just watch nature.
Speaker 1 (01:04:25):
Okay, well, is there anything else you want to share
before I close up, or?
Speaker 2 (01:04:31):
No, I think, I don't think we would actually talk
this long, but yeah, okay,that's everything.
I don't have anything else.
Okay, All right Well you'resoon to hear myself on this is
gonna.
Speaker 1 (01:04:41):
Oh yeah, I mean, of course, I'm a, I'm a edit it, so
we'll see.
Okay, well, let me do my outro.
Well, I've talked long enough.
Q out, oh.
Hey, hi, it's me Mama Q.
I welcome you to Moments in Q.
Let me interview you.
Bonus episode In Q today Hi Yand Tales of Hi Y.
I give you the greeting of theday and I'm explaining the why
of this episode.
Grand Rising.
Today's episode, I interview myaunt.
(00:21):
We stroll down memory lane withher as she explains how she met
her hubby a little over twodecades ago.
Additionally, she talks aboutbeing part of a big family.
The highlights for me was her,my cus and my uncle being owners
of dogs, chickens and goats,whilst having a garden.
She is really about that livingoff the land life.
(00:44):
Notice, I said living off theland, not off the grid.
They still have modern dayamenities, but it's cool to see
and learn about the things Iforgot or my science teacher
didn't teach.
Tell us of these interviews,first and foremost, are for our
ancestors and descendants.
(01:04):
I want to honor their ancestorsand the spiritual practice of
Houdu by talking about ourancestors by name and explaining
what this practice means to us.
Then I want the descendants tolearn more about their family
members in hopes of learningsomething new about our family
to share with future descendants.
In short, a time capsule, ifyou will for all to hear.
(01:25):
Besides, people perk up whenyou talk about them, so that's a
bonus too.
Today's episode is brought toyou by this quote from Matthew 5
, 3 through 10.
The beatitudes he said"'Blessed are the poor in spirit
, for theirs is the kingdom ofheaven.
Blessed are those who mourn,for they will be comfort.
(01:45):
Blessed are the meek, for theywill inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hungerand thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, forthey will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,for they will be called children
of God.
Blessed are those who arepersecuted because of
(02:06):
righteousness, for theirs is thekingdom of heaven'".
["blessed are the Peacemakers"].
Hey, hi, it's me, mama Q.
I welcome you to Moments in Q.
I have another interview today.
Today I am interviewing myauntie.
She is my dad's sister and I'mso excited for this.
(02:27):
You can say hi to the people'saunt.
Hello people, okay, cool, allright.
So I talked to my sisteryesterday which this will
probably premiere sometime in2024, january, because I'm still
on break until February and soI decided to continue talking to
family members and justlearning about life with him.
(02:47):
So again, I'm like super, superexcited and I can't wait for us
to begin you ready.
I guess, Okay cool, so we'regonna do the one more question.
So what superpower do you wishthat you had?
Speaker 2 (03:03):
The superpower that I wish I had is flying, because
I've always wanted to fly, evenas a little girl Used to play
with my brothers, Her dadincluded.
We used to get up, we had abarn like building and we get on
top and we used to put thingson our arms so we could pretend
that we were flying.
So, and I often have dreamsthat all I do is to just kind of
(03:25):
flap my arms and I'm flying andit's just a beautiful feeling,
that's it.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Okay, that's kind of cool.
When I have dreams, I havedreams about me flying too.
So yeah, I can see that.
The next question is what bookshave changed your life the most
?
Speaker 2 (03:44):
What books have changed my life the most?
Oh, you know what?
I'm gonna tell you something?
I'm not gonna say necessarilychange my life, but probably why
I'm the way.
I may have played a part orrole in why I'm the person I am
today, because when I wasgrowing up I used to like
mysteries, hearty boys andwhat's the lady name, nancy Drew
(04:07):
.
Nancy Drew and Hearty BoysMystery.
But when I was a little bitolder I loved Harlequin romance.
So I think, okay for you those,those back in the 80s.
So Harlequin romance would bethe precursor to Hallmark movies
.
Okay, okay, okay, becauseeverything was all night.
Well, no, it didn't actuallystart off as a good relationship
(04:31):
, but there were some kind ofyou know, angst or whatever.
But then the female gottogether with the male and
everything was rosy andbeautiful.
So I think that kind of changedmy life and maybe why I'm a
romantic type person.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Oh, you're hoping it's romantic.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Yes, I believe I am.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Oh, that's cute.
Yeah, when you said Harlequin,I don't know why I was thinking
of Harley Quinn from SuicideSquad, so that's why it kind of
put me on.
No, no, no Harlequin romanceOkay yeah, I just Googled it and
so I think I've seen some ofthem at like Tarjay or something
like that before.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
So I used to read one , just about one, every weekend
problem when I was in highschool.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
Okay, cool.
What's your non-apoholicbeverage of choice, like soda,
tea or coffee, you know?
Yeah, let's see what oh, gingerale.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
I love ginger ale.
Okay, I don't know why, but Iwell, a lot of times with I have
problems with my stomach, upsetstomach or whatever, but ginger
ale, I just like the flavor ofginger ale.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Okay, yeah, when you said that I about ginger ale, I
thought about how it's a thingwithin our black community that
you know I'm not feeling well.
Ginger ale, like ginger ale,and what is that Vicks rub on
your chest is like.
As black people, it seems to belike our go-to medicine for
everything.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
Well, for most it's stomach, ginger ale and voodoo
chips.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Okay, okay, I've seen them in the stores.
Okay, interesting, wait, aren'tthey spicy?
Speaker 2 (05:59):
No, they're more like barbecues.
Barbecue, oh, okay, the kindthat I get.
There's more than one kind.
I think voodoo is the brand,maybe I don't know, but I like
the.
I forgot what it's calledkettle chips.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Oh, okay, I heard of those.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
It's like barbecue, barbecue kettle chips.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Okay cool.
Yeah, Okay, what, oh, not what.
Who was your childhoodcelebrity crush?
Speaker 2 (06:21):
My childhood celebrity crush.
Yeah, just say, let me see mychildhood celebrity crush.
Oh well, football player wasTony Dorsett, because I thought
he was so cute.
I just really love Tony Dorsett.
He was a Dallas Cowboy playerand I don't know, I don't know
(06:43):
anything about football, justlike the way he looked.
And then on the other side ofthe ball was Elvis Presley.
I used to love Elvis Presleymovies growing up and I just I
would just sit in awe and singall the songs with him.
Yeah, that was just me.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Elvis Presley.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Elvis Presley.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
So have you been to the no?
Okay, cause I haven't.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
No, okay, after I.
You know, when I was becameolder, he didn't impress me so
much.
You see, a childhood.
That's why it's so.
Oh, okay, okay, yeah, I got you.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Okay, and I just looked up Tony Dorsett, but I
don't know how old this pictureis.
But yeah, okay.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Let me see.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Oh, that's when he was older.
You need to see him in thisfootball uniform.
Okay, tony, but anyway yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
I'm gonna.
I'm gonna look that up whileI'm asking you the next question
, cause I kind of yeah, okay,okay, like this picture.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
I don't remember him looking like that.
Is that him?
I don't know, but maybe inchildhood he was handsome.
I mean, those pictures are notso much, okay, well, never mind.
When I was a child I did.
I'd love to look at him.
Okay, I did.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
That's cool.
Would you rather live in theocean or on the moon?
Speaker 2 (07:54):
I'm afraid of well, yeah, I am afraid of drowning,
because I can't swim.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
So Neither can.
I the moon, maybe, I don't knowwhy.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Okay, cause I don't want to live in the ocean, so I
guess it's the moon, the moonokay, okay, that's fine.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
The last one more question Would you rather travel
back in time to meet yourancestors or meet your future
descendants?
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Back in time.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Back in time.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
I forgot, cause I often tell them, wonder if I
could meet my mom as a child.
I'd like to kind of watch herand see how she behaved, if we
had anything in common.
Or even go back further to seemy great-grandmother as a child,
and you know, maybe I don'tknow, I don't think I would like
to make it all the way back toslavery.
Yeah, but more so in the past,because if I were to go to the
(08:38):
future, there may be some thingsthat will okay.
If I pick either one, am Isupposed to be able to remember
going there or not?
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Oh, you know what?
Speaker 2 (08:48):
I got this off of Google and so so that's one
reason I wouldn't want to gointo the future, because I feel
like if I can't remember goingbackwards or forward, it would
probably affect the way I livetoday if I were to go forward.
But my past is already overdonewith, so that's why I would do
my past.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
I love how you just like I'm not, no, it's all good.
I love that you just no.
It's making me laugh, cause Ilove how you just dissected that
and in a good way.
In a good way, cause you'relike now would I remember
whatever?
And see, I wasn't even thinkinglike the afterfakes, I was just
thinking like past, future,yeah, no, and stuff.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
But I guess it's not that simple.
Yeah, I'm realizing it's notOkay.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
I can dig it.
I can dig it.
That's cool.
Okay, now we're going to moveinto what I call my moments and
cue questions.
So these are questions that Iask everybody, especially the
first two.
The last two when I was talkingto Tam yesterday, I added these
for her and then I was like youknow what?
I kind of like them and stuff,because the podcast is a mixture
(09:57):
of things, but I definitelytalk about who do and
spirituality a lot.
So I was like, okay, I'mprobably going to start asking
people more questions about that.
So the first one is what is whodo to you?
And of course, it's not a wrongor right answer.
So when you hear the word whodo, what do you think of?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
I've heard of who do, but I don't know what it is.
So actually I don't think aboutwho do, because if you were to
ask me in the last 10 days, 10years, I never gave it a thought
.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Okay, okay, well, that's fine.
Yeah, like I've said before,there's no wrong or right answer
with that, and I usually tellpeople what it is.
And I started thinking likeagain after because I'm
overthinking, a perfectionist,and so I like to do like I call
(10:47):
it A R after actions review ofthe things that I've done to see
on ways to improve it.
And each time I ask thisquestion and of course it's
always not a wrong or rightanswer I sometimes get people
who don't know what it is, whichis fine, and I always give it
like a very surface levelexplanation and it's not bad,
(11:10):
but I don't know.
I kind of wish that I could gointo more details and stuff.
So I guess I will for this time,go into a little bit more
details.
So what do you want to know?
Speaker 2 (11:20):
I mean, I don't go around my I don't, I don't think
about it, so sure you can?
Speaker 1 (11:27):
I mean you can tell me, oh, okay, cool, all right.
So our enslaved Africans beforethey came over to the United
States, they had their ownreligions that they brought with
them, and then, when they camehere to the South, they had to
adapt with what they werepracticing, because some of the
(11:48):
things that they had in WestAfrica they didn't have here and
stuff.
And so one of the tenants thatI always tell people about who
do is, of course, ancestralveneration.
So a person venerates theirancestors by talking to them,
giving them offerings and tryingto heal them, develop a
relationship with them, whetherthey knew them or not, because
(12:12):
even though the word ancestorsmake people think of someone
quote, unquote old or beforetheir time, it could be anybody
that passed away, obviously, andthey can be considered an
ancestor regardless of how oldthey were when they left.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
So, anyway.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
So that's part of it.
But they also used who do as aform of liberation and to deal
with Massa and the stuff thatcomes with that.
So they would use the Bible asa way to like, because that was
the only book that they weresome of them were allowed to
read.
So they would use the Bible asa way to help them use magic,
(12:50):
for defense, and also would useit for medicine and things of
that nature Because, again, evenwhen they were free, they still
were segregated, so theyweren't able to do certain
things.
So it's a lot of like Martinterms that we use, like
herbalism, was it because someof them knew the different types
of herbs to use to help themfeel better?
(13:11):
So it's a mixture of things andpeople practice it different
ways, just like differentdenominations of other religions
and stuff.
Yeah, that's the quote, unquote, short version of it.
Okay, okay.
So next one is name a momentwhere you can.
Okay, so I call things.
You can make this issue up.
Sometimes I'll curse and sayshit, sometimes I won't, just
(13:34):
depends on how I feel.
Um, I prefer ish, ish.
Okay, all right, that's fine.
I can try my best not to cursearound you.
I didn't promise, but yeah, soI call it.
Um, you can't make this issue,and so I came up with this,
because when I learned moreabout my ancestors and continue
(13:54):
to go down this who do path, isjust interesting to me where
there's these things that havehappened to me, that it's like
you can't make this up, like tome there was no denying about
what who do is, and I dounderstand that you don't
practice it, so it doesn't haveto just be with that, but anyway
, it's a time that to you, therewas no denying that God, jesus,
(14:16):
a higher power, whichever wordyou want to use to describe
whomever existed.
Does that make sense or do Ineed?
Speaker 2 (14:23):
to know this Okay.
So for me it would be God, god,jesus.
Oh, it's when I became pregnantwith my son.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Because, you know, before I, before I was pregnant
with my son, I had plenty ofnieces and nephews, siblings,
you know, and it's like I knowpeople got pregnant and had
children.
Speaker 1 (14:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
But when I became pregnant with my child, with my
husband, I thought, wow, that isa beautiful thing, and it was
so beyond not beyondcomprehension.
Okay, it was just like this wasdivine.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
This was God.
This was like God moving.
That's what he made man andwoman together, you know, to
replenish the earth, and I was apart of that.
And just to know that, I fellin love with a man here on earth
and we loved each other and wewere intimate with each other
and out of there grew a child.
(15:22):
Oh, that's like, yeah, thatblows my mind.
Yeah, okay, blows my mind.
And then, when he was in mystomach, and I went.
we go to the God of GYN and tohear his heartbeat that, you
know, like a thunder of horses.
Yeah, it was just.
That was divine too.
I just thought that wasbeautiful and wonderful, okay.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
Yeah, I like that.
So, finally, I did a good jobwith answering the question.
Again, there's never a wronganswer, but, oh my gosh,
whenever I ask people thatquestion, it makes them pause
because they sometimes don't getwhere I'm trying to get it.
But, yeah, you did so, I likethat.
Yes, okay, so I know that yougrew up in the country.
(16:06):
So, growing up in the country,did you learn any type of who do
things?
And I know that you saidearlier that you don't quite
know what who do is so like, forexample, did you learn or hear
about people saying you know yougot to be careful about eating
everyone's spaghetti or becareful about sweeping a
(16:26):
person's feet, or I had dreamedabout someone's pregnant, with
fishes or things?
Speaker 2 (16:30):
like that.
Well, okay, these are thingsthat I heard when I was in
school, not from anybody in myfamily, but to me it was
disgusting.
But about the spaghetti thing,I heard that before you know,
when I was in like middle well,middle school that's what they
call it now but we were stillelementary when I was growing up
.
That thing and the fact of mymother, I didn't you know, but
(16:56):
anyway, every time somebody inour family was pregnant, she
always dreamt.
She dreamt of fish and she saidwho's pregnant?
And most of the time when shetells them a few weeks later we
always found out that somebodywas actually pregnant.
So I didn't know that was partof that, but she, yeah, that.
Speaker 1 (17:14):
Oh, that's cool.
Yeah, there is like when I talkto my maternal grandmother
about this stuff because, asI've told people before on
different episodes, like Ididn't know that I was taught
all these things or learnedabout who do without having a
name to it.
So when I started practicing, Iwould talk to my maternal
(17:37):
grandmother and I would ask hersome things.
Now, of course, if I say who doto her, like most people she
think I'm talking about who doand that freaks her out or
whatever.
But she would do similar thingsas well where she would say, oh
, I had a dream about fish,who's pregnant and stuff and
just all these other differentthings.
And so once I started learningand researching about this, I
(18:00):
was like, okay, so, like growingup, some of us knew and they
call instead of calling who do,which is fine.
They don't quote unquote, haveto call it that, but like old
wives tales and stuff, andthat's so.
If I say that to grandma,she'll give me a whole list of
stuff, but if I call the who do,of course you won't and that's
and that's fine.
But yeah, not everybody hasthat ability of learning those
(18:22):
different things about the fish,the spaghetti and everything
like that that you had mentionedwhich is surprising to me
because we're in the south andwe're in Memphis.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Yeah, but, like you say, we always considered it as
old wives tales or just things,just things.
I'm here and see it.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
Yeah, okay, all right , I know what about this?
Speaker 2 (18:42):
your hand itching and get some money, get some money.
Speaker 1 (18:44):
Yeah, that's what they say.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
Well, I don't know my palm, not your palm in your
hand.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Yeah yeah, I've had that happen to me and shown of
money that I wasn't expecting toget came through.
I'm like wait a minute.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
So yeah, my palm is out of town, I don't get any
extra money, but I will.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
I know I'm asking you questions, but do you have any
questions to me about the thingsthat I do, such as Reiki, who
do, etc.
No, okay, cool, no problem.
Okay, now we're going to moveon to family questions.
All right, have you ever lookedinto your family's lineage?
Speaker 2 (19:20):
I have.
I started out with you know,when we have our family reunions
, we normally try to gettogether and talk about our
grandparents and greatgrandparents and so forth.
So and I also do have anancestrycom account which I need
to cancel because I'm payingfor it.
I probably hadn't looked at itin over a year, but I paid my
21.95a month.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
I need to stop it.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Yeah, because I pay minds once a year and it has
gotten expensive, but I love itat the same time.
Your brother, he allowed me tohave access to it, so I have
access to it Now.
He hasn't updated it in amoment, so man, it's probably
(20:07):
more updated than he is.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
You can have access to mine, okay.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Yeah, but it was pretty cool though.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
But I missed it.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Oh no, you're fine, you're fine.
So when I first startedresearching both sides of the
family, I was felt sooverwhelmed, but luckily he had
already had it.
So, yeah, what I mean is his isan updated.
All your siblings are on there,so that's cool.
But of course his children areon there but, like the rest, of
(20:35):
his nieces and nephews aren't,and it's not.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
Yeah, I have.
I've updated our immediatefamily all the way back to my
great.
Well, I want to say at leastgreat, great, maybe great, I
don't know, if great, great ornot, but at least great our
great grandparents and theirchildren.
So because I actually looked atcensus data to find some of
(20:57):
their information, but I think Ispent one Saturday and that's
when I first joined ancestrycom.
Just looking it up, I spent awhole day and I said, oh, this
is good, and then I didn't goback and get back into it.
But I have all the intentionsof doing it.
But yeah, so far.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Well, that's fine.
Uncle saved me a lot of time onthe paternal side.
So I'm on the maternal side andluckily my grandma is still in
her right mind, so she helped meout a lot and I was able to go
very far.
I was able to go to agrandmother having me in great
(21:35):
cities that was born in 1854.
And so I kind of sort of knowher mom's first name sort of,
but there's not that muchinformation and stuff.
And then her husband, and thatone goes very far because I
can't remember how he was.
(21:55):
But that one in particular,that ancestry goes far on the
husband, my grant, thatgrandfather side, because he was
enslaved here in TennesseeTennessee is I like to call it
and somebody else had alreadydid the research for me and I
even know like what plantationhe was on, and yeah, yeah, and
(22:21):
that one is pretty where was itUm degraffin reed plantation?
Speaker 2 (22:29):
Guess what.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
I don't know about the gap.
No, I don't.
But you can share.
But before you do that, thereason I'm glad I'm having this
conversation with you is becauseand it freaks me out, because I
want, I mean, it's too late.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
Now I'm freed up when I tell you by the graph and
read Okay.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
So, um, so this.
So, like I said, this is bydirect lineage on my maternal
side and so that grandmother,who I, which is the highest,
like I said, can go, her maidenname is my last name, and so
it's kind of like wait a minute,because yeah, so, um, we have
(23:06):
okay, so so obviously that'sfrom the husband, and so that
husband, like I said from, cango up or whatever, and we found
out what plantation he was on,okay.
So then the second thing is umthe family, the part of the
family that have that annual umfamily tree.
I joined their Facebook groupand I asked them what plantation
(23:28):
was that part of the familyfrom?
But they didn't say to graphand read.
Because in my mind it's likehow I got my last name from my
dad, but my ancestry, like I'mlike, oh, my gosh, are we can,
like it was so weird.
So blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, your turn.
Speaker 2 (23:42):
Well, there is someone in your life who we
spoke about earlier today.
Yeah, dad told me about that.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Oh man, I thought you were about to tell yeah yeah,
dad told me that that person.
That's interesting oh yeah,Same thing he said and I was
like, but that was a maiden name, but I thought it was like.
I thought he was going to likeshare something bigger than that
, no, when I was maiden, I mean.
I'm starting to know the firsthusband.
Yeah, yeah that's yeah, that'swhat he told me and he was like
that's interesting.
I was like yeah, okay, but Iwas hoping for a little bit more
(24:10):
.
But the interesting part whereI thought that maybe our
lineages had crossed is because,um, the graph read plantation
was around Mason, tennessee, andyou know one question was that
excuse me, tennessee, is thatlike no, I'm so sorry, okay.
(24:30):
So whenever I say Tennessee, yousaid, instead of saying
Tennessee, I say Tennesseebecause it's slang or whatever.
They say 10 a key because itdeals with it.
It's okay, it's okay so yeah,whenever.
I say 10 a key.
Oh, that's just me sayingTennessee or whatever, instead
of saying Tennessee, just rollwith it.
Oh, okay, but yeah, so um, andbecause I know what, um, what
(24:53):
city y'all grew up in?
or whatever it just made mewonder did our um ancestry cross
lines?
But, like I said, when theytold us what part of that
particular family tree onplantation was from, I was just
like oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
Somebody gave me some information I don't even know
what I did with it About fromyou know well, probably the
family reunion you werereferring to.
Yeah, he gave us someinformation this past family
reunion, but what did I do withit, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
Oh, yeah, I don't know this.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
More detail.
Speaker 1 (25:30):
Yeah, yeah, let me know, because it's always been
interesting to me to find outwhere I came from.
Um, and my great grandmotherwas born Well, we don't know if
she really was, because I can'tfind a birth certificate, but I
understand, because she was bornin early 1900s they wouldn't
have one.
But, um, I always wanted toknow all of these things or
whatever.
And, and um, she was born wethink 1915 and died 2005.
(25:55):
And before she died, uh, her,her, um, yeah, she wasn't there,
so her memory was, was bad.
So that's why I'm happy andgrateful and thankful that my
grandma can help me, um, but shecan't help me too much because,
um, she has still has her goodmemory, so she's been helpful
with certain things that I say.
She's like I don't rememberthat.
So, yeah, you want me to go tothe next question?
(26:18):
Sure, oh, okay, um, you almostkind of answered it, but that's
okay.
Um, do you know anything aboutour ancestry that you want to
share?
Speaker 2 (26:27):
Uh, no more than what I was about to tell you that I
learned about and I just well, Iwas told about it and it didn't
stay up in my head.
But I have something on somepaper but I don't know what I
did with it.
I can't remember what I didwith it.
I'll.
I'll let you know, but I can.
I can tell you somebody's nameand give that person's number.
(26:47):
They probably love they wouldtalk your ear off, oh sweet.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (26:51):
That would be.
That would be even like um ooh,third or fourth cousin.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Oh, okay, okay.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
That'd be cool.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
Yeah, Cause, um again , since, um, your brother helped
me out or whatever, and um, Ilooked up the names and stuff
and I thought that was prettycool, but um, I'm still more so
again curious If at any time ourancestors crossed path just
because of the location theywere from, and then my side come
(27:24):
into Memphis and your sidestand in the countryside just
out.
There was interesting.
And of course, the last name,so you know.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
But our family grew.
Our family lived in FayetteCounty.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
Yeah, that's in Fayette County, mason, tennessee
, mason is Fayette.
County.
It was nice it's not anymoreMason Fayette County.
Ugh Uh, Google's about to tellme I thought it was.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
I thought it was something else, like Covington,
the same as Covington.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I apologize.
Yes, you're right, tiptonCounty.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
Yeah, tipton.
Speaker 1 (27:55):
I don't know why.
I thought it was Fayette County.
Oh, oh, okay, okay, okay, mybad, yeah, one of them.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Yeah, but they're still close.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:05):
One of them was um huh, okay, I don't know why I
keep having Fayette.
I mean, I know our family'sfrom Fayette County, but I don't
know why I kept thinking I will, okay, that's fine, no biggie,
okay, um, how was life for yougrowing up?
Speaker 2 (28:19):
How was life for me growing up?
It was, um, we were very poor.
We had our necessities and nota lot of extras, but we, I feel
like we had.
What a lot of kids have don'thave today is they have a lot of
that external material thingsand don't have.
I feel like I had a lot of love, a lot of companionship.
(28:41):
Um, I just, I think I, Ienjoyed my childhood playing
with your dad.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:48):
The last three of us that we, we had Native American
names growing up.
Did he ever tell you about that?
No, I was Pocahontas, okay.
He was sitting bull, okay.
And our baby brother wasPontiac.
And these are all NativeAmerican names.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Okay.
And your baby brother?
Is that the one?
Y'all born in the same month?
That one, yes, okay, yes babybrother.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
So, yeah, so we used to play.
I mean I enjoyed my childhoodand I, I mean I knew, I knew
there are a lot of things thatmaybe we didn't have, that a lot
of other people did have.
But, like I said to me, we hadthings that were important, like
we had parents that loved usand we had each other and we
loved each other.
Of course, we, you know, we didthe same, we fought and we
called each other names andthings like that, and we, you
(29:33):
know, made fun of our olderneighbors and things like that
and so.
But I feel like I had a goodchildhood growing up and I'm
thankful for myself.
I was very thankful.
Speaker 1 (29:42):
Okay, so it's a lot of y'all.
You are number 11 out of 11.
Oh my goodness, yes, how wasthat?
And with the first one openlike okay, so okay, the first
one.
What's?
What's the age differencebetween?
Speaker 2 (29:59):
So the first one today is 71 and I am 57.
Okay.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
I'm about to do the math for that one real quick 71
minus 57.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
So my mother was pregnant.
My mother was probably pregnant, if not every year, every other
year.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
So at the time she was 25 to about 35.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Okay, something like that.
Okay, so, with the eldest being14 years older than you, were
y'all close growing up?
Speaker 2 (30:38):
No, because actually what happened was my mom.
We don't share the same day.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
Oh, that one.
Oh my gosh, I was thinkingabout the oldest sister, the
first one I was.
Speaker 2 (30:52):
I was my oldest sister is like number four Is my
oldest brother.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
I'm.
I'll cut it out in a moment.
Wait, y'all.
Y'all about to hear atransition and you will be okay,
because I have to figure outwhich person we're talking about
.
You'll be all right, okay, sowe're back, so I have to redo my
question again.
So you're the first.
The first baby that's 14 yearsolder than you is the eldest
(31:23):
baby boy so growing up.
Because of the 14 yeardifference, y'all weren't close.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
And no, it's not because of.
Well, of course we weren'tclose, because he was much older
and plus, he lived with mygrandmother and Memphis growing
up yeah, he didn't grow up withus.
He visited a lot and spent alot of time with us because back
then when my mother and dad gotmarried, when they got married,
(31:51):
they were living in I want tosay they said in my
grandmother's parents' home orsomething.
And you know, sometimes backthen things, those you know what
they would may have calledoutside children.
I don't know if they probablydidn't call it that then, but
because he was from another manthat he ended up staying with my
(32:11):
grandmother and he was raisedby my grandmother in another in
the city.
Speaker 1 (32:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
I never knew that because, like during the pause,
that they'll never hear.
Like I said, I thought thefourth one was the oldest.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
The fourth one always act like that the oldest female
.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
Yeah, yeah, yeah I'm not the oldest yeah.
I always yeah, I totally forgotabout him.
Okay, Okay, so with, okay, sowith all of y'all, with the age
difference, y'all were still, orwere you?
Just I hate to make it soundlike you were more closer than
one than the other, but I guesswhat I'm trying to say is
(32:50):
despite the age differences, howwas that?
There we go.
Speaker 2 (32:53):
Because of the, because of the age differences,
it was almost like we were maybeI don't want to say three
family maybe it was three likethe older group, the middle
group and the youngest group, soit was almost like we were
three separate little families.
Speaker 1 (33:07):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Because my older I don't remember.
I remember my oldest sisterbecause she went.
She went to.
I remember her best becausewhenever my our parents were
going somewhere, she was alwaysleft in charge of us, so
therefore she's always been likewe call her system.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Yeah, system of her, because she was always in charge
of us when, when our parentswent around.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
And so that lasted till today.
Yeah, yeah.
And so you know, as we gotolder, you know we learned each
other.
We learned more about eachother, but growing up I was
closer to your dad.
Okay, the last three of us.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
I think I would say the last three of us were closer
growing up because we werecloser in age.
Yeah, and you know when you're,you are a what we call it now
the tweens, or a child.
You don't really hang out orassociate yourself with the
teenagers and older.
So because we were, you know,two years apart, yeah, so we
(34:13):
were two years between all of us, right, 81, yeah, 81, 83 and 85
.
Yeah, so, yeah, so, since wewere closer in age, then we were
closer because we grew upplaying together.
Yeah, like I said, pocahontas,honeyack and Sit and Bull, yeah,
okay.
Speaker 1 (34:32):
That's cool.
I didn't, yeah, I asked.
I asked that question initiallybecause as my sister and I are
14 years 14 years apart and sowe didn't really grow up around
each other until, like, webecame adults, and then we got a
(34:53):
little closer and we're closernow, so that's why.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
I was just wondering wasn't like?
Speaker 1 (34:56):
that, so it's the same, okay, cool.
So what are the lessons orvalues from your childhood that
you still carry with you today?
Speaker 2 (35:06):
I don't think to appreciate family to that.
It's not so much about materialthings that you have, it's
about the love you can sharewith people.
You know it's not things, it'sinanimate things.
Like I said love and sharingand just being kind to each
(35:28):
other.
You know we're not gonna alwaysagree with each other, don't?
We know that we're not gonnaalways agree, but we can get
along, we can talk and state ourdifferences but still remain
family and respectful towardeach other.
That's what I say, you know.
That's my thing is that thethings that I like, I think,
(35:51):
things that I live by, we don'thave to agree with each other,
but we can show kindness to eachother still.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
I think I learned that from Mama.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
Okay, what was one of your fondest memories as a kid?
Speaker 2 (36:05):
My fondest playing with your brother.
I mean your dad playing withyour dad and my brother just
growing up with them.
My friends, my best friends Areyou all still best friends now
Not so I mean, I wouldn't sayfriends.
It's almost like this withchildren.
(36:28):
The saying goes your daughter'syour daughter all her life.
Your son's your son until hetakes a wife.
So my brother's my brother untilhe takes my wife, takes a wife
Because it seemed like when theycan't, they couldn't be my best
friend because they had theirown best friend and her mates.
(36:48):
I guess.
Oh, okay, that's the way I seeit, and so I think I would think
of my sisters more so as mybest friends.
But it's still not.
It doesn't take away from ourrelationship, but it was almost
like when they both got marriedthat it was kind of it was
different.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
Like the whole thing.
What cleave to your wife orsomething.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
Oh, okay, gotcha Okay .
Speaker 1 (37:11):
Were there any family traditions that you looked
forward to every year as a child, or, you can say, as an adult,
it doesn't matter which one.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
Same as a child in adulthood was Christmas time
because, like I said, there wasalways so many of us that we
didn't get a lot of extra things.
But at Christmas time we alwaysgot a little extras and we were
able to put our tree up and wehad our little boxes.
Where we had, we would takeshoe boxes and decorate them and
the next morning we wouldalways have our fruit, our candy
(37:43):
and we have our gifts Fruit,candy and nuts and gifts.
So it was always Christmas time.
Maybe that's why I loveChristmas to this day and I feel
like, even if I still have myson, he does come home for
Christmas.
I would decorate and I toldpeople that I work with that.
It's not for anybody.
(38:05):
No it's just, it's for me, it'sfor you.
I decorate for me because itmakes me happy.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Okay, do you have a favorite tradition that you have
just with my uncle and your son, or is it just still with the
whole Christmas thing?
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Well, that's part of Christmas.
Well, I just like.
I like our relationship,because sometimes we get
together just sit on the sofaand watch movies together.
So that's kind of a traditionalthing, for especially since
he's older and not living withus anymore, and sometimes he'll
come in the bed with us likewe're at the top of the bed,
(38:41):
he'll be at the bottom, and oneyear and I can remember this
very well, I don't know weplayed some game about songs.
We were just playing songs andsinging.
And just family time and beingtogether and just enjoying each
other's company.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
Okay, yeah, all right .
So, as you and I know,obviously most of your siblings
joined the military.
Did you like what you did, sodid you not want to join the
military and be with?
I mean, again, it's not a rightor wrong answer, but I just
find it interesting.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Well, I did take the As-Val and I could have joined
in the branch of the servicethat I wanted, but I think I was
too much of a mama's girl.
I love my mom and even after Igot married, when I would come
home for Christmas, I get to bewith my mama and spoon get in
(39:32):
her book.
Yeah, that's the best feelingin the world.
Well, it is one of the bestfeelings in the world for me,
and so I think, maybe because Iwas too much of a mama's girl.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
I was my mama's baby forever.
Forever.
Because even when I was ateenager, I didn't want to be
known as a baby.
Because she said you'll alwaysbe my baby.
I'm like roll my ass back tothe back of my head.
Yeah, oh, yeah but as I got anolder, I learned to love that,
and I would, even after I had mychild.
She'd be holding my child andI'd be right up on her too.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Oh, that's sweet Until the end, yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
Yeah, so You've always tried to be a peacemaker
and, as you know, it drives mebanana, but it's you.
Is there a specific reason asto you wanting peace in the
family despite all of ourdifferences?
Speaker 2 (40:22):
Why not?
Why not?
I just feel like we kind oftalked about this earlier.
For me, it's like everybody inthis world is different and I
don't say that I will get alongwith everybody and I will agree
with what everybody does, be itfamily or not family, but as
(40:45):
long as it's not hurting me orhurting someone else, to forgive
.
I think it's.
For me it's because I don'tever want to live with regret,
because life is short on thisside, and I want to, I want to
be able to say that I I can'tremember the saying.
(41:06):
It's something that I thinkthat your brother used to say,
because he used to do the MartinLuther King speeches all the
time.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
You mean your brother .
Speaker 2 (41:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:18):
I keep following in your brother.
It's okay, I'm good You're deadwhen I say your brother, I mean
you're dead.
Speaker 2 (41:24):
Yeah, martin Luther King has a speech.
I think it says does it havesomething?
Does it say something aboutbeing a drum major for peace?
A drum major.
What is a drum major speechabout?
Speaker 1 (41:37):
Oh, let me see MLK drum major speech.
Oh gosh, um, he says somethingabout the drum major instinct
and the desire to be first, tobe recognized and to receive
distinction.
Speaker 2 (41:52):
Or maybe I just know.
Maybe, maybe there's some,maybe I'm confused with
something else.
Speaker 1 (41:56):
I found a quote.
It says we all have the drummajor instinct.
We all want to be important, tosuppress others, to achieve
distinction, to learn the parade, and the great issue of life is
to harness the drum majorinstinct.
Speaker 2 (42:09):
is a good instinct If you don't disorder and
perverted maybe there's not, butanyway no, no that may not be
it, I may have I may be quotingit wrong, but anyway.
But for me it's just.
It's just.
When someone would ask me whybe a peacemaker, my question
would be why not?
Yeah because there being apeacemaker to me is not being
(42:32):
harmful to anybody.
It's just that you know, youjust accept people for who they
are.
When people, as the saying goes, when people show you who they
are, believe it and let them be.
Yeah, and we don't have toagree with everything that they
do, but we should be able tojust let them be, and they
should.
Maybe let me be.
And to me.
I mean, you know, that's justthe way, that's just right.
Speaker 1 (42:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:58):
Okay, my eyes just right to be a peacemaker.
Speaker 1 (43:00):
Okay, yeah, I got you All right.
This one's going to beinteresting, as.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
I can make it here Blessed are the peacemakers for
theirs, as to what the kingdom,god or heaven or something like
that.
Blessed are the blessed are thepeacemakers, oh the attitudes.
Speaker 1 (43:14):
Oh oh, I remember.
I remember the beatitudes fromcollege, but I don't remember
the rest of it.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
Yeah, wasn't really big enough by growing up.
Yeah, yeah, okay, this is theone.
I'm excited to hear your answer.
What is the most fun memory youand I have had during our
family relationship?
And oh my gosh, please don'ttalk about me singing that song
that you always like.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
It is that song.
I just, I was been thinkingabout that song all day but I
just, I just like you as alittle girl because you were
just, you were always to me.
You were just so smart and youalways wanted to to me learn
things.
And you just the cutest littlething.
Speaker 1 (43:53):
Your mom used to dress you so cute and you just
All of them, pigtails in my hand, I know, and you couldn't get
dirty.
Speaker 2 (43:59):
But I mean, you know she, you know I, just, I don't
know you, just a little, alittle sweet little girl and
always was inquisitive,pretending like you're reading
newspaper, even though it wasupside down.
You know you just, yeah, youjust Incerezen.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
Yeah, I don't you always tease me about that one
and I'm never offended, but I donot remember this song.
I know the song it was byLeverte.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
Oh my goodness, A song was a song by Leverte which
which like the dad.
Leverte the group, oh the group.
Oh, Rick Leverte, Dang it.
Oh something to do with Name.
Some of the first major songs Idon't have a Leverte group
songs.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
Okay, google, do you remember at least what year I
did this, how, what?
Speaker 2 (44:49):
year were you.
Speaker 1 (44:49):
I'm a 83.
All right, so here comes myforever love, 1987.
Pop goes my mind, 1986.
Casanova, yeah.
Speaker 2 (45:00):
You didn't say Casanova.
You used to say cast, cast andover, casting over.
Yeah, that was it, casting over.
Speaker 1 (45:10):
That's funny.
You said that because I wasthat song.
Wow, okay, I do kind of likethat song.
I would always like laugh andhearing it now as an adult, but
it never dawn on.
Okay, yeah.
Speaker 2 (45:20):
You didn't say Casanova, you said cast, cast
and over, casting over.
Speaker 1 (45:26):
Okay, we're going to move into relationship questions
.
Whoop, whoop.
Okay.
How did you meet uncle, whichis your husband?
Speaker 2 (45:35):
I used to.
I met senior.
I call him senior.
Speaker 1 (45:37):
Yeah, we actually call him dad, but yeah, for this
one, yeah, we're all.
We're all with senior.
Speaker 2 (45:43):
Okay, whatever.
Yeah, I call him dad too.
Yes, um, one Friday evening, myroommate uh, I had a roommate
at the time was I had tworoommates actually but one of my
roommates had just gotten offfrom work and she was like oh so
you know, I'm so tired fromwork, but she wanted to go out
and have fun and I didn't wantto go anywhere.
I wanted to stay home.
(46:04):
Mm, hmm, like I do, I love myhome.
Wherever I live, I've alwaysloved it, but I wanted to be
home.
She's like no, let's go out.
So that's why I met him.
We went out in the in afterhours play.
So I guess you say, uh, what do?
you call that the club.
It wasn't actually a club.
Speaker 1 (46:19):
Well, happy happy hour, oh, happy hour, okay yeah.
Speaker 2 (46:22):
I met him happy hour.
Speaker 1 (46:24):
Okay, and how long did y'all date?
Speaker 2 (46:27):
We dated from how long date before we got married
and became engaged?
Oh oh, we dated two years.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
Y'all dated two years , got engaged.
Speaker 2 (46:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:41):
And then yeah, Okay, and um yeah, okay.
And they didn't, and dating him.
What was your typical dateslike?
Speaker 2 (46:52):
Um, a lot of times we would go out to dinner, okay.
A lot of go for walks Okay,because where he live, well, he
lived by a golf course.
Okay, we walk around the golfcourse.
I remember one particular.
Speaker 1 (47:05):
Oh, those apartments, I remember them, yeah, yeah,
yeah.
Or condos, or whatever, Iremember them, okay, yeah.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
And we walk around that golf course, cold and stuff
, so we go to picnics and apart,uh, things like that.
Speaker 1 (47:19):
Okay, wait, let me see.
So y'all been married for 31years 31 years.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
So that means wait so that, wait, you were around
when we were dating because ofone another.
Yeah, I tell you, I tell youAnother memory I had was I had
told your mom that I wouldbabysit you, mm-hmm, and we
would went over to his where hewas living in the, in the
convenience, and, uh, you know,you were just, you were there
with us.
(47:45):
And you know I was like we were,that was in the early years or
early months, probably, uh-huh,and you can't say oh, yeah.
You said, oh, I'm sorry, youused to call me Aunt Weija,
weija, something like that.
I want to go home on Weija.
So well, that's another one ofmy memories, but yeah.
Speaker 1 (48:07):
Oh wait Did I get married.
Speaker 2 (48:09):
We didn't have a wedding.
Oh, we didn't have a wedding.
We got married to courthouse.
Oh, okay, because I actuallywent out with one of my friends,
one of my best friends at thetime Uh-huh, we went looking for
when we decided, you know, hehad proposed and we decided we
were getting married.
We went looking for a weddingdress, mm-hmm, and I got a
headache and I said no, I don'twant to go through this.
(48:32):
Uh-huh, because I'm introvertedand I didn't want to be the
center of attention.
Okay, so I just wanted to makeit legal because we lived
together before we got married.
Okay, and I just wanted legaland I wanted to be right inside
of God.
Okay, so we went down to thecourthouse and I was the
happiest person in life.
Speaker 1 (48:50):
Oh, and how did you?
We were married.
And how did you know he was theone?
Speaker 2 (48:54):
How did I know he was the one I don't remember?
Oh, okay, I just remember himbeing because number one.
When I was sick, he brought mesoup whenever I needed.
When I got ready to move, hewas always there for me.
When in a crunch, oh, and evenwhen it wasn't a crunch, he was
(49:16):
always there for me.
He was just a good person.
He was just, you know, he wasjust good to me.
That's so sweet.
Yeah, it was good to me andgood for me.
Speaker 1 (49:28):
Okay, so we all have been married for 31 years.
I'm sure the relationship hasevolved over time.
We have any advice orsuggestions for married couples
as their marriage evolved?
Speaker 2 (49:41):
Yes, don't, even though I love Harlequin romance
and I remember romantic personand I love Hallmark movies, but
life is not a Hallmark.
It is not, definitely not.
There are gonna be days whereyou, you'll always love your
mate, at least this person, atleast I will, yeah, at least I
(50:02):
will always, yeah, my person,but I won't.
Some days you may not like them.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Yeah, not that you don't like,like them, you just.
You don't get upset, yeah.
So my thing is, when you it'slike I saw something on Facebook
one time and this is one thingI you have to live by mm-hmm, is
(50:26):
that the toothpaste?
And the two, the two, the twotoothpaste?
Okay, your words are thetoothpaste.
When you get a tube oftoothpaste and you just press it
out, yeah, yeah try to put itback in.
Speaker 1 (50:39):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (50:39):
Yeah, you can do that .
So, yeah, my thing is to watchyour words, don't?
And for me it was before ISpeak.
What a footage part.
Where was I?
Speaker 1 (50:53):
He lost um.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
Talking about the two with two things and you can't
get the words out.
Speaker 1 (50:59):
Oh, and you say it for you.
You try to be careful with yourwords.
Speaker 2 (51:02):
Yeah, and when I feel like I can't be careful with my
words, have to be quiet for awhile, so we'll retreat into
different rooms, okay, and we'llbe quiet Until we'll come down,
and then you get together andyou talk and discuss things out,
so that way you won't saythings that you like the two
with two pages.
Yeah try to put back in it.
Yeah, because once those wordsare out, you can't put them, you
(51:25):
can't take them back.
You can apologize for them.
Yeah, but there was some peopleit was stick with them.
So you don't want to, you wantto cause it in memory like yeah,
you know, that's me.
Speaker 1 (51:37):
Well, that's what I do with, with, with our family.
You know I know what I'm aboutto say when I say it and you
know I stand on business.
All right, so you're You'repart of the Weedon boys Cowboys
fans.
Was it mandatory or optional tobe a Cowboys family when you
got with uncle?
Speaker 2 (51:55):
When I got with uncle I was already done, boys.
Speaker 1 (51:59):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (52:00):
Them boys in quote.
Speaker 1 (52:01):
Yeah, no finger quotes.
Speaker 2 (52:03):
Yeah, I never really was a football.
I Didn't follow football, Ijust do some.
I knew players.
Yeah and for, I guess becausein the house that I grew up in
most people like I guess it wasmy whole family, like the Dallas
Cowboys Before I met on yeah,before this I saw stragglers.
Speaker 1 (52:22):
Oh, dad talk about it all time.
Speaker 2 (52:23):
Well, she didn't, she didn't like football.
That okay, when she was in thehouse with us.
Uh-huh, that was something shedeveloped afterwards.
Okay, the reason I asked thatquestion she used to be actually
used to be a WashingtonRedskins fan.
Speaker 1 (52:39):
okay, now, whether they're Washington, I think the
commanders or something yeah thereason I asked that is because
when I got with my boo thing,love of my life, the one of the
first things he asked me waslike what's your favorite
Football team?
And I was like I don't have one.
I like college football.
Well, I said I like college.
Well, first of all, I don'tlike sports period.
(53:01):
And if I had to pick a Favoriteor whatever, it would be my
alma mater and that's collegeand stuff.
And he was like, okay, so nowyou're a Cowboys fan.
And I'm like, okay, so now I'mpart of the Weedham boys.
Um, last year for Thanksgivingwe went to our first
professional football game inperson ever.
We drove to see the Cowboysagainst the New York Giants and
(53:24):
I am so happy that the New YorkGiants won because I was like if
they did not win, I know that Iwould have to hear that or
whatever.
So I'm like you.
I I'm not real big on sports orwhatever, but I do definitely
make sure that I have my Cowboyssweatpants that I stole from
him that belongs to him, butthey're mine now and I have my
cowboy hat and I have my owncowboy shirt and stuff because I
(53:48):
had about new outfits so I canbe part of the Weedham boys or
whatever, but I I root for themand I look at the game.
Speaker 2 (53:54):
But like I'm just not big on sports, neither Real,
but we went to our first livegame last year Uh-huh matter of
fact, this time of year, becauseit was a was?
Speaker 1 (54:04):
it was a cowboy.
Speaker 2 (54:05):
Yes, and guess what the Cowboys won?
Speaker 1 (54:09):
Let me tell you, I guess, oh my gosh, yeah, because
um, they won, yeah, so that'sgood.
Speaker 2 (54:15):
Well, I say we, they went because the men went to the
game.
Uh-huh, the latest date outsidetailgating.
Speaker 1 (54:21):
Oh, okay, okay, that's fine.
Yeah, um cuz.
What was was earlier this weekthe cow, oh my gosh.
So, yeah, cowboys um laws.
Who did we go against?
The dolphins, I think.
And, oh my goodness, I hadhorrible.
Yeah, I had to hear about itand he is.
Speaker 2 (54:36):
Right at the end.
Speaker 1 (54:37):
Yeah, he's so frustrated cuz again I'm just
there for support whenever thegame is on, I'll just like sit
next to him and I'll look at itor I, or I'll go to sleep or
whatever.
Because again, yeah, yeah, cuzI mean I look again, I'll look
at it and I know the very basicscuz he taught me.
But like any of the what, thefouls or whatever, when they do
the yellow flag I know none ofthat stuff is going on.
(54:59):
So, but I just I know when atouchdown comes exactly, and I
just know when to cheer for theCowboys.
And people send me Memes and I'mlike y'all, I'm a fan, but I'm
not a fan like that for y'all tobe sending me these memes, for
me to get offended.
Speaker 2 (55:12):
I.
Speaker 1 (55:12):
Because of him like yeah so same here.
Speaker 2 (55:16):
Yeah, I really I Don't really care for football,
yeah so we have not we?
Speaker 1 (55:22):
I'm sorry I have a few more questions.
I put this under personal orwhatever, but they're still
interesting.
So I told my me to me that Iwas on my way to your house and
she had told me that you hadchickens and of course I'm
laughing at her because I don'tbelieve her, but she was like
for real, you do.
And so when I got here andlaughed about the whole chickens
, I learned that you also havebeagles, goats and a garden.
(55:43):
So y'all have like a smalllittle was zoo or whatnot around
here.
How did they come about?
Speaker 2 (55:50):
My husband is all.
That was all for my husband,because I grew up where I'm
around here today.
It's about two or three milesfrom where I was born.
I was born at home, by the way.
Did you know?
All of us were born at home.
No, that didn't tell me all ofus were born by at home, and our
grandmother, my paternalgrandmother, was a midwife and
she delivered.
All of us in plus two, twonieces.
Speaker 1 (56:11):
Oh, okay, the, the, the great grandmother that I had
.
They lived in Memphis.
Is that maternal, paternal?
Speaker 2 (56:22):
That's your maternal.
Oh, okay, so I don't think I'vemet Uh no, you didn't, because
I was 12, okay, I was 12 whenshe passed away.
Oh, okay, okay, so she was amidwife?
Speaker 1 (56:36):
Yeah, that is so cool , yeah, so okay, but I guess
that would make sense because,oh, this is gonna sound so
ignorant, but I'm actually waylike it's a.
It's a small city.
We consider that the country,so like did y'all have to go,
like to the city for ourhospitals or whatever?
So was that one of the reasonsthat y'all were born in the
house, or just worked out thatway?
You know what?
Speaker 2 (56:58):
it's not a big deal, no, it's probably because you
know, she delivered all thebabies and took care of all the
babies.
Oh, there's a midwife, and sothat's what people did, most of
most of the black people that Iknew, uh-huh, in the country In
front where we grew up.
Yeah, we're born at home.
Okay, I think, okay, maybe.
Speaker 1 (57:18):
I don't?
Speaker 2 (57:19):
I think so.
Yeah, cuz I even met someonewhen I went to University of
Memphis, mm-hmm, who we werejust talking.
We were talking about what wewere from.
You know how you?
Just talk about your family andI found out that she delivered
her.
Oh, she was my residentassistant, mm-hmm, at the
dormitory where I lived, yeah,in the University of Memphis.
My grandmother had deliveredher and her siblings.
Speaker 1 (57:42):
But the question was oh, the, the Beagles, goats,
chickens in garden, you know.
Speaker 2 (57:48):
I was saying, yeah, his mate, I'm his mate Because,
like I said, I grew up in thecountry and I knew what it was
like, but he grew up in the city, uh-huh, but his goal, his goal
(58:09):
and his dream was always tohave a little piece of land.
Okay, call his own.
And so that's what we are rightnow.
So these are things I Neverwould have thought about.
Half the things that he thoughtabout, yeah, you know, because
I'm like I lived here before, Iknow, but no, apparently he knew
a lot more than I did, and sowe had the chickens for, and you
(58:29):
know, we did just for eggs, andjust because I think my husband
likes To think of himself as afarmer, I mean a mini farmer,
yeah, I know, and I just supporthim as the end way I can, and I
just, you know, he Plants and Ihave him plant.
You know he Teals a man and thegarden and I haven't planted it
(58:52):
and I picked some things andyou know what was the?
The veggies and things grow.
Yeah, we'll go out theretogether.
Yeah, go out there alone, andit's just nice, it's just nice
to be outside.
Speaker 1 (59:04):
Yeah, I, um, I I think I told you I can't miss
not a big deal.
Well, yeah, I had a help gardenand other things that I grew
because hemp is legal inTenaquil.
So my first Season they made it, but unfortunately we had a
cold front and killed them andstuff.
And then Last year I think Idid them too late or something's
(59:27):
wrong with my soul, I don'tknow what I did not a big deal
with.
Like, I like gardening as well.
I grew okra they didn't make itbut they were growing and I
grew basil.
That actually made it and stuff.
And for the first time I feelsilly amending it, but for the
first time I had basil off theleaf and that was pretty cool.
So, um, my mini me got me intogardening.
(59:49):
Um, she was an elementary andwas like, hey, mom, let me tell
you about germination.
I'm like okay, oh, we shouldplant something.
I'm like all right, so westarted planting flowers at the
woman they gave birth to mehouse and then, when her and
when many me and I moved intowhere we're in now, since it's
my space or whatever, becauseit's a, it's a town home, but I
(01:00:12):
mean it's it's my house, I'm notan apartment.
So anyway, um, I startedgrowing, but by that time she
didn't want to participateanymore.
But I found fun and growing aof Flowers and herbs and
hopefully one day I'll do betterwith it, but I don't know.
It's just relaxing and fun.
Speaker 2 (01:00:29):
So yeah, that's one about husband feels about it too
.
Yeah but it's just really great.
You know, I guess sometimes Imay take things for granted, but
you know, sometimes when youneed something, I need a bell
pepper yeah, summertime I justgo outside and pick it up.
You know, yeah, my garden pickthe bell pepper.
Yeah, tomato, need a tomato.
Go to my garden pick a tomato.
And I don't I don't necessarilylike okra, but they grew we got
(01:00:52):
the most Oprah this year thatwe've ever had and they grew and
grew and grew and grew and grewyeah, yeah, I was plenty of
okra.
Speaker 1 (01:01:00):
I don't care too much for okra, I just wanted to grow
it and I did it at the wrongtime because we caught a heat
wave, I want to say last yearand, um, yeah, nothing came from
it.
But I don't, I'm not.
I might be done with the hemp.
We'll see how I feel, but I'mnot done gardening.
Um, again, I I do want to do itfor the food and stuff like
that, but I still find fun In init.
(01:01:22):
So it's not a big deal.
So, um, two more questions andwe'll be done.
This one is this one is talkingabout Adult children.
So you and I both have onechild.
Clearly, my cousin is a man andhe's older than my mini me.
How did you handle your onlychild transitioning from a young
teen to a young man?
Speaker 2 (01:01:45):
I cried a lot, okay, no, actually when he was growing
up in the house, everything wasfine prayer, prayer and crying.
Because I Remember him when hefirst got his license, yeah,
when he first started trying todrive.
Yeah and we would be.
I will let him drive the churchbecause I was like you know,
(01:02:05):
every Sunday I'll get in the carwith him and I would literally
Not just, I will literally besick.
Speaker 1 (01:02:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:02:12):
I have to go to the ladies room and I got to the
church literally Cuz my stomachwas so cramped and you know, my
dad, my dad, his dad Uh-huh,took him out at night and did
the, you know, the base trainingfor him to drive.
Yeah, but to give him drivingexperience.
I roll with him.
You just have to have.
Speaker 1 (01:02:33):
I'm going through that now.
Speaker 2 (01:02:36):
Yeah, prayer, prayer, prayer yeah, okay.
I don't, I don't want to evergo back to that feeling.
That feeling was horrible, yeah, horrible.
Yeah, I'm going through thatand then, when he graduated from
high school yeah, and got, wetook him to college, got him
settled in at his dorm room andwe hugged him goodbye.
And man, I cried this day, Icried August.
(01:03:02):
The sea was August 17th 2017.
Wow and I cried, and I cried,and I cried some more.
Uh-huh and then I thought aboutit.
I was like he's not going offto war.
Yeah, he's not he's not goingto jail right.
This is a good thing.
Speaker 1 (01:03:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:03:22):
And then you cry get that crying and I did, but then
it got.
You know I'm about you kind ofgot used to him being away.
Yeah and you let it go.
Yeah, and I kind of just let itgo until he came home again For
Christmas break, and then I hadto let him go again, but I
didn't cry quite as long thattime.
Yeah, and so each time you know.
Speaker 1 (01:03:45):
The last question is how do you like to spend your
free time?
Speaker 2 (01:03:48):
How did I like to spend my free time?
I like to spend my free timeJust being with nature, I guess
being outside.
I take walks outside, I like to.
I'm in an exercise program now,mm-hmm.
So even though I don't, whileI'm doing it, I don't
necessarily like to just look atnature, look out my window and
(01:04:10):
just watch.
You know birds and I've seen alot of different birds that I've
never seen in Almost 30, somemy years and watching the
animals Outside just do whatthey do, naturally.
Yeah, just watch nature.
Speaker 1 (01:04:25):
Okay, well, is there anything else you want to share
before I close up, or?
Speaker 2 (01:04:31):
No, I think, I don't think we would actually talk
this long, but yeah, okay,that's everything.
I don't have anything else.
Okay, All right Well you'resoon to hear myself on this is
gonna.
Speaker 1 (01:04:41):
Oh yeah, I mean, of course, I'm a, I'm a edit it, so
we'll see.
Okay, well, let me do my outro.
Well, I've talked long enough.
Q out, oh.
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