November 6, 2024 • 38 mins
Can a shadow sorcerer and a comedian survive betrayal in a dragon's lair? In this thrilling episode of Monster Monster, join Chester Blackfield and Ekrem as they navigate the treacherous halls of the Time Dragon's manor. With Kaka Bloodaxe's betrayal looming large, our heroes face a harrowing choice: align with a malevolent quest or meet their doom. Follow along as they receive lethal dragon-slaying daggers, setting the stage for a high-stakes mission filled with pop culture nods and strategic maneuvering.
As the adventure heats up, Chester and Ekrem find themselves locked in a battle of strength and emotions against a horde of cultists. The episode captures the tension and excitement of a classic Dungeons & Dragons session, where quick thinking and clever strategies are key. Witness the dynamic actions as they reinforce magical barriers and enhance their abilities with a potion of cloud giant strength. A fiery fireball spell becomes their ace in the hole, demonstrating the daring and resourcefulness that keeps listeners on the edge of their seats.
But the stakes rise to an unimaginable level when Ekrem considers the ultimate sacrifice to protect existence itself. The episode builds to a climactic twist as the sorcerer contemplates breaking the staff of power, risking everything in the face of chaos. With Ekrem unexpectedly transported to a mysterious plane, our heroes are left grappling with uncertainty and the weight of their choices. This engaging narrative explores themes of courage, teamwork, and resilience, promising an unforgettable journey for fans craving the thrill of adventure and the complexity of strategic role-playing.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Monster Monster, a real-play Dungeons
Dragons show with comedians ascharacters.
I am your Dungeon Master, CavanEggleston, joined today by Hi,
I'm Tyson Cox.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
I'm also a comedian and I'm playing Chester
Blackfield, a punchy mustachedman.
Is this a good rhythm?
No.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
It's like very NPR pledge drive.
I feel like you're going totell us about a tote bag we can
get if we just donate.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Well, if you do donate a few dollars, all right.
And our other comedian?
We do not have time for this.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
And my name is Tyler Waltz.
I will be playing Ekrem, theshadow sorcerer.
That understands that some thatI had that one good quote the
first time and we're just goingto leave it at that.
I'm a dark, shadowy boy.
See previous episodes forcharacter backstories.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Alright.
When we last left our intrepidadventurers, you guys had just
been betrayed by the right handwoman of the time.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
dragon, the half-orc Kaka Bloodaxe axe left you an
ultimatum join her in endingexistence or die well,
canonically, we've had such goodluck well, we kind of gave like
a little wink to each other andwe're playing along if I
remember correctly how that lastone ended, so yeah I mean
(01:24):
because, like I was saying,canonically we've been.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
She's never had to save one of us specifically like
three or four times no, she'snever proven that she's hyper
competent at violence and mayhem
Speaker 1 (01:38):
no, we got this alright, so you folks are on the
fifth floor of the Time Dragon,the Lore Worms manor house.
No, we've got that settled.
She reaches behind her to oneof the cultists, pulling a case
(02:04):
from his arms you are going toneed these and she hands you the
case opened in front of you,and you see two daggers.
The pommels of each of them area dragon screaming in agony.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
Neat In my head.
I just think Teston, teston, isthis Ekrem in here, bud?
Teston, check, check, yeah,what you need, bud, oh shit.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
Well, first of, all.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Hey, thanks for actually talking to me.
That's pretty nice.
I think the first time you'veever done that.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
Yeah, shit's pretty dire.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
I'm just checking in on you.
Does this dragon seem like it'sscreaming in agony?
It seems like it.
Oh, that's not a good sign.
Speaker 3 (02:54):
We like dragons?
Right, we do.
But I think we should go aheadand take the dagger, because I
mean, I like daggers.
I do think they're kind of cool.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
Oh yeah, it's beside the point, I don't really dagger
.
Much Can he get?
Speaker 1 (03:07):
I mean he can have mine, take it.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Chester, all right, sure, what do they do when
Chester takes the dagger?
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Yeah, the metal feels colder than anything you've
ever felt.
Just waves of necrotic energykind of radiate from this blade
and you realize it's designed tokill, specifically kill,
dragons.
But even then the strength ofthe magic and it makes you feel
(03:35):
like a little nauseous.
You feel a little bit like, oh,this could kill.
This is meant to kill a dragon,but this could end me very
easily.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
Well, is there a sheath in here as well?
Speaker 3 (03:47):
I pull out my notebook.
Also can kill Chester's.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Dragons, check Chester's question mark.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
What are the chances it doesn't kill one of them?
She goes?
No, but I know someplace youcan bury it.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Like safely, so I don't wound myself.
Sure bud, that's great.
Where is that?
Speaker 1 (04:14):
And the lore warms back Ekron.
Speaker 3 (04:19):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Yeah, I'll take one, okay.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
No hesitance, you know, he's just like okay, you
grab it.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
The same cold malice radiates from this.
You can again get the feeling.
Speaker 3 (04:29):
Weapons aren't evil, people are evil, and I take the
dagger.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
She goes no, no, this weapon definitely evil.
Yeah, they say that, but thenthey made these.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
It's like the brooms in that one animated short
starring that Mickey Mouse.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
I think that's past me bud.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Son of a bitch, I'm old.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Okay, Fantasia really .
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Really.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
I don't know which one of you I'm more disappointed
in it's fine.
I watched.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
Godzilla growing up?
Speaker 2 (05:02):
Yes, oh yeah, yeah, he gets sworn by sentient brooms
.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Yeah, you guys take these daggers and she leads you
back down and she goes we'llmake the distraction, you boys
make the kill.
And she kind of just pops herneck a little bit menacingly,
(05:29):
takes that axe in her hand Again.
That you, just that thing isjust.
What's surprising is it'smassive, but it's also not
ornamental Like she.
This is just a tool to her andwith that she signals for the
cultists to burst into the room.
To the lore worm Immediatelyassumed across the threshold.
(05:51):
You see them just vaporizeinstantly as spells of warding
go up.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
Oh, hell yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
And she just Cause violence.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Kaga Cause the.
I'm just excited because theviolence, not because, like our
dude, died.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
You hear in your head hey, shut the fuck up, it's
like Go ahead and make adeception check.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
Yeah, like we're so close Against her percent, like
this isn't going to be fair.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Can I help?
Speaker 1 (06:19):
Okay, yeah, sure, okay, I'll help him.
Be, like hey, he's just reallynervous.
Speaker 3 (06:24):
You know, like we've worked together, you should know
him All right.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
I just think you're real pretty.
Go ahead and make an athleticscheck.
Athletics, oh no, to tell agirl, she's pretty.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
Yeah, he tells them with a peck pop.
Is that why I'm?
Speaker 2 (06:39):
not successful.
Four plus seven 11.
Four plus seven eleven, shegrabs you and just snarls in
your face, and then hurls youinto the room.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Hope this doesn't hurt uh falling in love that is
kaga you make it through thewards.
Uh, in front of you is the thelore worm kind of her.
Back is to you all.
She's managing the defenses.
She's this will hold them for awhile, but they will break
through eventually.
What do you have planned,Chester?
(07:13):
Where's Ekrem?
Ekrem is, and.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
I turn around and I go wait.
Oh, am I part of thedistraction?
Speaker 2 (07:19):
No, no, you're back in the ward.
I'm like Ekrem.
No, she just threw him throughthe, did you?
No, you're back in the ward.
I'm like.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Ekram?
No, she just threw him throughthe.
Oh okay, Did you just like?
You know what?
Speaker 3 (07:26):
I see where this is going to go.
I'm just going to move myselfin.
I just kind of assumed that.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I would follow.
Oh, ekram, you're looking forEkram.
Ekram was actually just rightbehind me.
Let me turn around and addresshim.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Ekram, how are you doing back?
What the fuck do I do?
I got to fight Kaga, but Idon't.
Oh beans and dip.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
So we are staying loyal to the to the dragon.
Yes, I will use.
Speaker 3 (07:52):
Well, I'm thinking this through as we plan because
I don't want.
Ok, hear me out.
Oh, this is Tyler, not correct.
This is Tyler, ok, sorry.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Ekrem.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
Or I guess it is Ekrem's internal monologue.
It's like okay, so we're notbetraying, but we also want them
to think that they're gettingthe jump on the Lord dragon.
So I will use message tomessage the dragon and say
basically as brief of a summaryof like they just gave us
daggers.
Kaga is going to be in heresoon and she has betrayed you.
(08:24):
And then I'll like flash thedagger, like slide a hand, if
that'll work, okay, and then belike shit's going to go down.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
But we have your back thank you for telling me all of
this.
Now go ahead and do it.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Agro, I was talking yeah, she wasn't messaging you.
Yeah, you're like I can hearthese thoughts.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Why are you doing this?
Speaker 3 (08:43):
do I need to do the slide a hand for the dagger?
Speaker 1 (08:45):
um, so basically what's happening is she's got
almost like a wall of uh orprismatic wall in front of uh.
You guys, you have the passwordso you can move through it
because she trusted you ortrusts you.
Um, in theory, kaga can movethrough it too, until we find
otherwise.
Um, but you can send thatmessage.
Yeah, uh, kaga can see you.
(09:05):
So if you're trying to be subtlewith this like, think of it
like that scene in episode onewhere Obi-Wan Kenobi's like on
the other side of that wall.
So you want to go ahead and dothat slight hand yes, and that
is a seven.
So let's see against herperception.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
Not great.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
You just hear from the other side of the wall.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
You, but I had inspiration from a couple
sessions ago.
Are you going to use it?
I was lying about that.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
But now that you've confirmed it, I will.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
See what you got bud, oh shit, all right, send it.
I did a real life deceptioncheck.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Okay, that's a 14 with my bonuses.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
But I got double inspiration From that time.
I saved that orphan.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
I got you a meat stick that you bought us.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
Yeah from Hitler.
Remember when I did that bighero moment.
You saved an orphan from Hitler, I did.
You saved a meat stick that youbought us.
Yeah from Hitler.
Remember when I did that bighero moment.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
You saved an orphan from Hitler.
I did.
You saved a meat stick fromHitler.
Yeah, I was like, oh, I'm goingto eat this Slim Jim.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
Whatever gets me that other role Okay.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
You dumb, dumb bastards.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
I messaged Chester.
Still pretend to be on her sideyou're gonna stab acro?
Speaker 1 (10:28):
no uh the loreworms, like this was always a
possibility.
Well, there's no accounting forher choices.
Speaker 3 (10:46):
Very calm about this I appreciate that about you.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
You see a lot when you're the embodiment of time.
I thought I was going to be alot more subtle, so I'm very
embarrassed.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
Yeah, no, you see her .
Speaker 1 (10:58):
She is just slamming this axe.
You see cracks starting to formin this wall of, as if almost
just her rage.
We should handle that.
And strength can break thisdown.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Once she starts swinging it, I'd like to go
ahead and spear tackle her Likerun toward the barrier.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
You're going to run out of the barrier?
Speaker 2 (11:16):
Yeah Well if she's swinging it at the barrier.
I'm inside of it.
It feels like the problem isoutside the barrier.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
Okay, go ahead and let's do an opposed athletics
check.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
I'll let you do that before we do initiative 16 total
.
All right, she got an 18.
So go ahead and describe it tome here.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Yeah, I was just kind of hoping to catch her because
she hits it, swings it back up,trying to break down the barrier
with her axe On the backswing.
I'd like to actually come andcatch her, because that's just a
straight up, very open pose.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Okay, yeah, you know what, since you described it
that way, go ahead and haveadvantage on that.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Okay, all right, I have a pretty good athletic, so
let's hopefully it's above it.
No, it's worse.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Okay, Uh, so you go and do this spear tackle, Uh,
you wrap your arms around herand you, for a second, begin to
just drive her back away fromthis wall and uh can I seize
that opportunity to use my staffof power to create a wall of
force where she was hitting it?
To like bolster that wall yeah.
(12:28):
You know that's not how.
That's fun though I'm going tosay go ahead and make an Arcana
check.
If you beat a 15, you're goingto reinforce that wall where
it's been starting, thatprismatic wall where it's been
cracked.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
Is it Arcana?
Yeah, fucking 15 on the dice.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
Doesn't even matter what my bonus is.
So immediately, chester is nowon one side of it.
You have sealed off effectivelythat cracks that were forming.
You see again these cultistsjust throwing themselves against
it, just trying to breakthrough Just through sheer
numbers.
The lore dragon or the loreworm behind you is well, chester
certainly is impetuous.
Let's see what we can do tohelp with that.
(13:08):
Ekrem, do you by chance haveany means of reaching Chester
through there?
Can you get to him?
Chester through there?
Can you get to?
Speaker 3 (13:25):
him Out of character?
Would I know what could andcould not pass through?
Speaker 1 (13:31):
So, right now, anything that you do, she will
allow to pass through.
Oh yeah, if you have a magehand or something she'll be able
to pass it through, yeah, soyou want me on the other side
with you want me physically, youcan stay here, okay cool and
that's great.
Speaker 3 (13:43):
I'm much better here Now that I think about it.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
I think he'll be fine and then she casts Fly on you
so you can now fly, and she alsosays give this to our boy, it
should level the playing field alittle bit.
And she throws you a potion,and it's going to be a potion of
(14:05):
cloud giant strength, nice, oh,what the fuck.
So, uh, let's go ahead and rollsome initiative here.
Oh, fucking kaga, wow, okay.
So apparently okay, she doeshave advantage on initiative
(14:26):
rolls.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Never mind, you guys are back to being screwed, all
right.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
I got a 22.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
17?
Okay, so 17, 22.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Also 17.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
Also 17.
All right, and then thecultists are going to go on
initiative count.
Okay, those will go at the veryend.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
All right.
Speaker 1 (14:41):
Ekrem, what would you like to do?
Speaker 3 (14:43):
Well, I will fly up to the top of the dome and then
throwing Chester the potionwould be an action.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
I would say that we'll make that.
That'll be a free action, it'sjust kind of a toss.
Speaker 3 (15:00):
Okay, is Chester in a position to catch it?
Speaker 1 (15:03):
He'll have to make a athletics or an acrobatics check
to catch.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
Are you feeling frosty?
Yep, okay, I will chuck it.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
All right, give me a heads up or anything.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, just bink.
Speaker 3 (15:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
Off my body.
Oh fuck, I didn't tell him.
I was like, oh, that was theonly one.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
Nat 20.
Speaker 3 (15:22):
Okay, he catches it with his mouth.
Yeah, 31.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Five giant strength.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
Oh no, hang on.
I did that with the ticket, soit would be plus seven.
It's a Nat 20.
Yeah, 27.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
Yeah, okay, 27.
Fantastic, I'm going to evensay, just with that, 20, you're
going to drink it in your turn,so you'll be able to have the
potion.
You won't even have to try totake it Nice.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
It looks like when somebody wins a race, just yeah.
No, he just got Gatoraded.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Yeah, your already impressive physique just swells
more.
You get all veiny vascular asbook.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
Oh no, it's a potion of dehydration.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
And then I'm assuming we haven't had any sort of rest
or anything in between?
No, you won.
We haven't had any sort of restor anything in between?
No, I will use all but the lastpoint of my staff of power to
cast Fireball from the staff inthe biggest cluster of cultists
I see.
Okay, that doesn't includeChester.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
That would be so funny, unless.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
I hit like I think Chester's worth like four
cultists, so if I can get four,more, you actually get six more
cultists if you just drop itright think Chester's worth four
cultists you actually get sixmore cultists.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
If you just drop it right on Chester, if that can
entice you, you can get six morecultists.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
Actually, that potion of Clouddryer and Strength very
flammable.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
It's just moonshine.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
We lied to him it's just hooch, go ahead.
They've got to make their dexsaves.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Yes, they do.
And while you do that, Cultistsare notoriously dexterous.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Except for they all have drone 20.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
All right, that clump of cultists is going to roll
their dex saves.
Go ahead and roll your damage.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
I was trying to remember how many d6s it is.
A fireball's worth 8, d6.
, 8d6.
, 8d6.
And that's a lot of fours.
That's 30 damage, okay.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
So they'll take 15.
Speaker 3 (17:09):
All of them passed.
I ruled it as a swarm.
How about you think that over?
Speaker 1 (17:16):
No.
I gave you inspiration and thenyou made up a story about orphan
saving.
So that fireball hits it doesthin out uh the pocket of um
cultists and they are going tobe taking uh like a turn off to
kind of like regroup themselves,to kind of collect uh
themselves.
Kaga meanwhile just like justshrugs it off again.
(17:38):
That how much damage?
You say, uh, that was 30, 30.
Yeah, she uh effectively justkind of again just smoking a
little bit, just like.
All right, so it's going to be,she braces herself, it's going
(18:00):
to take a couple swings at youthere, chester.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
That makes sense the spell I was going to wrap it up
with is actually a full actioninstead of a bonus action, so
that's a bit of a goof on my end, yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
It would have been very helpful.
It would have been pull Chesterout of danger.
Speaker 3 (18:14):
No, but it would have introduced another danger.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Yeah, All right, so that's not fun.
All right, so 20 hit.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
How about a 24?
Also, yes, all right, how doyou want to do this bud?
Let's see Where's my D12?
Die Softly?
Nope, I don't, we don't, wedon't.
So that's five, it's going tobe 19.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Slashing damage as that axe cuts into you on the
first hit.
Speaker 3 (18:54):
You're doing great, sweetie.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
And then that's going to be another 21.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Ooh, we're not doing fabulous.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
So 21 damage and then 19 damage.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
Huh, yeah, I look pretty rough, but I'm here, all
right.
Speaker 1 (19:19):
Then she just kind of looks at you and she goes you
don't understand.
Do you know how many loved onesI've had to lie to and say this
is I'll save them, just toreset and have to do it all over
again?
Speaker 2 (19:41):
But that's the point of them.
You get to enjoy them, you getto have them, even if they go
away.
They're never really gone.
I can't believe you don't seethat with all your trips around,
you think it's all aboutsuccess.
Failure is just as much of lifeas success.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
Okay the way we're going to do this, because not
only are you fighting herphysically and she is just a
specimen of destruction.
It's almost like I made a statblock and was just like yeah,
I'll learn from that.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
I don't like that Personally.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
But this is also like I mean.
You see, she is conflicted.
This is a person that was toldshe could save reality and then
has just failed time and timeagain and watched people fail,
watched specifically you twofailed time and time and watched
people fail, watchedspecifically you to fail time
and time again and had to undoeverything.
(20:46):
Watch, uh, her loved ones reset, but she knows what happens to
them.
All that go ahead and you'regoing to make a um persuasion
check here to kind of appeal toher better nature.
Now, this is going to have ahigh DC.
It's going to be a 20.
Okay, if, on each consecutiveone, if you choose to kind of
(21:09):
take some time to do this,either of you, we're going to
just keep dropping that DC.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
Ekrem's not really a redemption guy, then you can be
like I'm going for the kill, allright, okay uh, yeah, I gave a
little speech about how youshould enjoy the people and
that's kind of the point andpersuasion.
Nine okay.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
Well, she doesn't seem like convinced.
You do know that it's like someof your words are getting
through and so she kind of shejust looks again like that weary
, like she's just tired of this.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
And you said she's upset because she was told she
could save everybody and hasfailed.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
She's seen every time faith get trusted in saviors
and they have let people down,and she's had to basically be
the stopgap, resetting thisreality.
Every time, her and the loreworm, and every time she
remembers what's happened, buteveryone else around her doesn't
.
Okay, okay, that's going to beyour turn, chester okay um,
(22:26):
that's gonna be your turn,chester.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
Uh, non-lethally throwing that up top.
Uh, yep, uh, you're a morehonorable man than me?
Speaker 2 (22:29):
yes, uh well, luckily I'm a fighter, so I can
non-lethally punch the shit outof people you can't non-lethally
fireball a lot of folk.
Uh, I'm gonna go ahead and, uh,unarmed striker, uh does a 19
hit, sure does okay.
Uh, then a 31, okay, okay, uh,and I'm gonna, I'm gonna hit
like like, like rib shots, youknow, like rocky uh getting down
(22:49):
there.
So the for my first 17 plus 10,27 fantastic, right and go
ahead and roll your surges.
Okay, and the whole.
While I'm like you think no onewants to fail, but it's
necessary, it has to happen.
(23:11):
The good has to have the bad.
You know these things.
And then it was 16 and nine.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
Okay, fantastic.
So nothing happens.
Happens, but you do feel thatmagic starting to glow.
Ekram, what would you like todo?
The cultists are regrouping,they are amassing to take
another push okay.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
well, I'm going to see that things are not going
phenomenal right now and I willhold out my hands as darkness
rolls from my eyes and I catchthe darkness with my hands as I
fall to the ground and when Islam the ground, I summon a
spirit of death behind thecultists.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Okay, oh dear, you're just in the shadows behind you.
You're like yes, so close.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
So close, still not talking to you.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
I feel like when you say you don't talk to me, but
you acknowledge.
I feel like this is talking.
It's not Tomato, tomato.
Speaker 3 (24:09):
It follows an action.
My action will be to command itto attack Kaga.
It does basically three thingson its first turn.
The first one is I can choose acreature for it to haunt, which
will be Kaga.
Kaga will need to pass a DC 15wisdom check or be haunted.
Speaker 1 (24:32):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (24:33):
So that's first thing .
Speaker 1 (24:37):
DC 15?
.
Speaker 3 (24:38):
Yes, all right, she passes, she passes.
Okay, so the haunt effectsdon't happen.
It has multi-attack equal tothe number, the spell level in
half, so two attacks.
I guess that's the incentive tocast at a higher level.
It's a weird spell, I like it alot.
And then for every cultist itmoves through to get to Kaga
(24:58):
they take a d10 of force damageokay, so I don't know your force
damage.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
I don't know how many it can pass through it's got 30
feet of movement, it could passthrough that swarm?
Speaker 3 (25:08):
it does, but each person it passes through counts
as rough terrain.
Okay, so I'm basicallystrategically placing it to
where it can pass through andget to kaga can it be doing like
midwest, like?
Oh, oh yeah yeah, just like.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
Oh, it's so cold um oh, I feel like gooses.
Speaker 3 (25:26):
Oh, there's a breeze under my robes and then its
first reap attack got an 18 tohit.
Okay, we'll let that hit.
And then the second to hit gota 11.
So I'm guessing that one's notgoing no, that one won't.
So the one that hits will donine necrotic damage.
(25:49):
Okay, and that will be my fullaction is to summon that Reaper.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
All right, um right, the lore worm, uh, she's going
to take a her lair action andshe's just going to look at you,
ekrem, and be like do youremember a time when you felt
really good, think about that.
(26:17):
And she's going to basicallycast the equivalent of a long,
or give you the equivalent of along rest oh shit cool hell yeah
and then for chester, glad Ijust completely blew my load on
those last two rounds uh, youare going to get basically the
same thing, except this time,like you're going to be able to
(26:40):
basically take a short restequivalent of burning your hit
dice, since you're on the otherside of the prismatic wall.
So you can give yourself the hitdice heal, she's going to take
that axe and again prepareherself to kind of do a backhand
swing at you.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
All right, 28 hits, 30 hits.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
I'll tell you stories all right, all right 15 damage
and 15 damage, so 30 damage I'mgonna look at the dragon and be
like do that to him.
I was doing fine, I was justmissing spell slots To see all
that faith every time she placesin you two, and every time
(27:29):
you've disappointed her.
Don't you ever get tired offailing?
And that's going to be yourturn.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Chester kind of ruminates on the fact that he
has been more or less kind oflike a failure his entire adult
life.
He had all this promise growingup as a boxer and you know he
got a bit of a.
(28:03):
You know the hometown hero.
People are rallying behind himand all of his successes have
come through like dumb luck andother people's failings, and uh,
and then his mind shifts to allthe good times he's had, all
the, the drinks with friends,the, the nice meals, the
(28:26):
training sessions, and uh, helooks up at kaga and he's like I
haven't failed.
I, I might be a failure, I'vefailed.
I might be a failure, I'vefailed in the past.
But you get up again and it'salso about the people around you
(28:47):
.
You should know this.
The moments that you get,that's the truly important thing
.
You might be the most blessedof us all if you get to relive
that over and over again thelaughter of a friend that you've
lost.
Once you get it again, thatfeels like it should be mighty
powerful.
(29:08):
Uh, and I hope you can see that, uh, and I'm gonna try to like
wrestle, like, like, punch her,like, wrestle and like, try to
like punch her, punch her wriststo get the axe out of her hands
.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
All right, go ahead and make that persuasion check
and that DC has been dropped.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
Wait, I got it Actually.
Can I go back and just goEnglish or Spanish?
Speaker 1 (29:34):
All right, Persuasion check of fucking three somehow
in words she's like she heardI'm a failure and she's like,
yeah, charlie brown, speak afterthat all right, go ahead to
(29:55):
grab our uh, I'm.
Let's do this as just acontested strength throw or a
strength check to see if you canwrassle the blood axe out of
her hand.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Okay, you said strength check, Yep, okay 23.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
She rolled a 20.
Speaker 2 (30:12):
On the die yeah, oh, that's nice for her.
Yeah, that's great.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Again hyper-competent , this Kaga, yeah.
So you've got to kind of grabthis out of her hands and she
wrenches it free.
Go ahead and give me an insight, check Ten.
You can't tell the emotionreading her face Like this is
again just a stoic person.
(30:37):
You can tell there's somethinggoing on behind that mask of
just kind of anger and fury, butyou're not sure quite what.
All right, the cultists, theones that aren't like oh, this
is breezy on my tokens, weshould really wear something
under these robes.
Feels like death.
They're going to go ahead andagain just charge at this wall,
(31:01):
kind of trying to break it down.
Give me a high or low.
Speaker 2 (31:04):
Low.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
Alright, they make it through the second part of the
wall and just kind of go up inflames.
Oh, just incinerated instantly.
Speaker 3 (31:18):
I was about to do something drastic but, it seems
like we might be, maybe not.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
Alright, ekrem, what would you?
Oh, I'm sorry, that would bethe Lord Dragon's option.
She looks at you again, chester, and she's gonna cast a heal on
you.
So, chester, I don't want totell you you're doing poorly,
(31:49):
but it would be very nice if Ididn't have to keep doing this
Same page baby.
Yeah, so, oh wow, it justregains you 70 flat hit points,
oh shit.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
All right, I do the Henry Cavill like, clock my arms
.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Yep, all right, ekron , what would you like to do?
Speaker 3 (32:09):
Okay, so there's cultists that have breached the
wall.
They're at the second.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
So a prismatic wall has basically Roy G Biv levels.
Yeah, they're through the firenow.
How many cultists are left?
This seems like there's just astream of them coming in.
Speaker 3 (32:29):
I'm thinking about doing something very drastic.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
Well, don't talk about it, Be about it.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
Well, here's the thing.
I don't know if it's toodrastic for the situation To
save existence.
That's kind of what I'm gettingat.
Okay, I delete existence.
I will as a free action.
Can I message Chester?
Speaker 1 (32:51):
What's the spell, say , that's a good.
Speaker 3 (32:54):
I thought it was my power.
Oh, you tell him, okay, yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:57):
I thought you meant casting message the cantrip.
Speaker 3 (33:00):
Can you get behind the wall?
Speaker 2 (33:04):
The prismatic the wall, the prismatic wall, the
prismatic wall, the wall forgetting to safety is essentially
what I'm telling you to do.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
I think so, and since he didn't use his movement, can
he try and go for it?
Speaker 1 (33:18):
And since he didn't use his movement, can he try and
go for it?
You know, I'm going to just saywe're just going to do an
athletics off to see if you cando this with Kaga not getting an
opportunity attack against you.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Okay, I mean I trust Akram, I'll take the opportunity
attack.
I did roll a natural 7, plus 11, 18.
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Okay, she's going to take a swing at you.
I did roll a natural 7.
Plus 11.
18.
Okay, she's going to take aswing at you.
Yeah, that's going to hit.
All right, you're going to take18 damage as that axe cuts into
you, slaying a nice sliceacross your back.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
I don't like that.
Speaker 3 (33:54):
My body hurts a lot, but do you make it to the other
side?
Do I die?
Speaker 1 (33:59):
Yeah, Maybe Do I, but do you make it to?
The other side.
Do I die?
Yeah, Maybe Do I.
No, you make it across Again.
She's been kind of protectingyou from this.
Speaker 3 (34:06):
I actually reach out to that entity in my head and I
say, hey, I know that you don'thave much faith in me, but fuck
you, I'm not going to fuck thisup this time as I fly into the
crowd and break the staff ofpower over my knee in the group.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
All right.
What happens if you break astaff of power?
Speaker 3 (34:28):
However many charges there are left, which is
currently one.
I call it snapping into a SlimJim so it was one, but it resets
every day, so I didn't rollwhen the next day rolled over
and I got a six, so it actuallyhas seven charges left on it.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
But didn't you spend them all on a fireball just a
few minutes ago?
Speaker 3 (34:47):
No, because when I was doing that, I thought I had
11 charges.
So I spent 10, but I neverre-rolled to get them back for
the crossover of the day.
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Okay, so it works out as seven.
Okay, I see what you're doing.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
So anything within 10 feet take eight times the
number of charges in the staff,so eight times seven worth of
damage.
Speaker 1 (35:12):
Quick Tyson.
How many is that?
56.
Damn it, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
Everything 11 to 20 feet takes six times, and
anything 21 to 30 feet takesfour times.
Speaker 2 (35:21):
Okay, I will admit, as soon as he started saying
numbers, I knew you guys weregoing to throw to me.
I was like all right, Okay.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
So you take that damage too, though, right
Correct.
Speaker 3 (35:32):
But I also have a 50-50 chance on a percentile
dice to warp to another plane ofexistence.
Speaker 2 (35:40):
Oh, what the fuck.
Speaker 3 (35:42):
So, but I'm going to kill all of these cultists, okay
.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
So you deal 56 damage .
Mm-hmm.
Go ahead and roll your dice myoh, the percentile.
Speaker 3 (35:54):
Yeah, yes, that's a 96.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
So Okay, I guess we should have established yeah,
yeah, yeah, you should havesubstantiated which the higher,
the low uh, let's do higher, low, pick, higher low.
Not now you're gonna roll again.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
Oh damn it, cabin, you're bad at this, yeah pretty
easy.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
I put real high pretty high.
Speaker 3 (36:15):
I'll do high again, to which I got a 63 63.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
I'm sorry.
36.
Speaker 3 (36:25):
I read it backwards.
That's on me.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
You warped to the plane where all the other
cultists Were like, drinking MaiTais and shit.
Speaker 1 (36:34):
Goo, monster Like a Throg, not alone Throg, not
alone Throg.
Find pretty haired.
Nope, chester, you see you'vedived through this but to your
(36:56):
surprise you've seen Ekram kindof take your place in front of
Kaga and smash this axe or smashthis staff of power.
Just blinding light just kindof makes it so you have to turn
away and in that place I'm justgoing to roll here, pick high or
low, low, low, low, let's golow high or low Low.
(37:21):
Let's go low.
You see the corpses of cultists, but you see no sign of Ekrem
or Kaga.
Speaker 3 (37:31):
Silver lining, since I got warped to another plane of
existence.
It says I avoid the damage.
So jokes on them.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
So, with that said, your best friend is gone, ekrem,
you find yourself drifting in asea of stars, and that's where
we'll end this episode.
Speaker 3 (37:57):
I sure hope we fucking won.
There's more to do all right,guys.
Speaker 1 (38:03):
That is it for this episode.
Welcome to Monster Monster, a real-play Dungeons
Dragons show with comedians ascharacters.
I am your Dungeon Master, CavanEggleston, joined today by Hi,
I'm Tyson Cox.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
I'm also a comedian and I'm playing Chester
Blackfield, a punchy mustachedman.
Is this a good rhythm?
No.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
It's like very NPR pledge drive.
I feel like you're going totell us about a tote bag we can
get if we just donate.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Well, if you do donate a few dollars, all right.
And our other comedian?
We do not have time for this.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
And my name is Tyler Waltz.
I will be playing Ekrem, theshadow sorcerer.
That understands that some thatI had that one good quote the
first time and we're just goingto leave it at that.
I'm a dark, shadowy boy.
See previous episodes forcharacter backstories.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Alright.
When we last left our intrepidadventurers, you guys had just
been betrayed by the right handwoman of the time.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
dragon, the half-orc Kaka Bloodaxe axe left you an
ultimatum join her in endingexistence or die well,
canonically, we've had such goodluck well, we kind of gave like
a little wink to each other andwe're playing along if I
remember correctly how that lastone ended, so yeah I mean
(01:24):
because, like I was saying,canonically we've been.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
She's never had to save one of us specifically like
three or four times no, she'snever proven that she's hyper
competent at violence and mayhem
Speaker 1 (01:38):
no, we got this alright, so you folks are on the
fifth floor of the Time Dragon,the Lore Worms manor house.
No, we've got that settled.
She reaches behind her to oneof the cultists, pulling a case
(02:04):
from his arms you are going toneed these and she hands you the
case opened in front of you,and you see two daggers.
The pommels of each of them area dragon screaming in agony.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
Neat In my head.
I just think Teston, teston, isthis Ekrem in here, bud?
Teston, check, check, yeah,what you need, bud, oh shit.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
Well, first of, all.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Hey, thanks for actually talking to me.
That's pretty nice.
I think the first time you'veever done that.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
Yeah, shit's pretty dire.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
I'm just checking in on you.
Does this dragon seem like it'sscreaming in agony?
It seems like it.
Oh, that's not a good sign.
Speaker 3 (02:54):
We like dragons?
Right, we do.
But I think we should go aheadand take the dagger, because I
mean, I like daggers.
I do think they're kind of cool.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
Oh yeah, it's beside the point, I don't really dagger
.
Much Can he get?
Speaker 1 (03:07):
I mean he can have mine, take it.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Chester, all right, sure, what do they do when
Chester takes the dagger?
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Yeah, the metal feels colder than anything you've
ever felt.
Just waves of necrotic energykind of radiate from this blade
and you realize it's designed tokill, specifically kill,
dragons.
But even then the strength ofthe magic and it makes you feel
(03:35):
like a little nauseous.
You feel a little bit like, oh,this could kill.
This is meant to kill a dragon,but this could end me very
easily.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
Well, is there a sheath in here as well?
Speaker 3 (03:47):
I pull out my notebook.
Also can kill Chester's.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Dragons, check Chester's question mark.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
What are the chances it doesn't kill one of them?
She goes?
No, but I know someplace youcan bury it.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Like safely, so I don't wound myself.
Sure bud, that's great.
Where is that?
Speaker 1 (04:14):
And the lore warms back Ekron.
Speaker 3 (04:19):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Yeah, I'll take one, okay.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
No hesitance, you know, he's just like okay, you
grab it.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
The same cold malice radiates from this.
You can again get the feeling.
Speaker 3 (04:29):
Weapons aren't evil, people are evil, and I take the
dagger.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
She goes no, no, this weapon definitely evil.
Yeah, they say that, but thenthey made these.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
It's like the brooms in that one animated short
starring that Mickey Mouse.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
I think that's past me bud.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Son of a bitch, I'm old.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Okay, Fantasia really .
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Really.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
I don't know which one of you I'm more disappointed
in it's fine.
I watched.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
Godzilla growing up?
Speaker 2 (05:02):
Yes, oh yeah, yeah, he gets sworn by sentient brooms
.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Yeah, you guys take these daggers and she leads you
back down and she goes we'llmake the distraction, you boys
make the kill.
And she kind of just pops herneck a little bit menacingly,
(05:29):
takes that axe in her hand Again.
That you, just that thing isjust.
What's surprising is it'smassive, but it's also not
ornamental Like she.
This is just a tool to her andwith that she signals for the
cultists to burst into the room.
To the lore worm Immediatelyassumed across the threshold.
(05:51):
You see them just vaporizeinstantly as spells of warding
go up.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
Oh, hell yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
And she just Cause violence.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Kaga Cause the.
I'm just excited because theviolence, not because, like our
dude, died.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
You hear in your head hey, shut the fuck up, it's
like Go ahead and make adeception check.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
Yeah, like we're so close Against her percent, like
this isn't going to be fair.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Can I help?
Speaker 1 (06:19):
Okay, yeah, sure, okay, I'll help him.
Be, like hey, he's just reallynervous.
Speaker 3 (06:24):
You know, like we've worked together, you should know
him All right.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
I just think you're real pretty.
Go ahead and make an athleticscheck.
Athletics, oh no, to tell agirl, she's pretty.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
Yeah, he tells them with a peck pop.
Is that why I'm?
Speaker 2 (06:39):
not successful.
Four plus seven 11.
Four plus seven eleven, shegrabs you and just snarls in
your face, and then hurls youinto the room.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Hope this doesn't hurt uh falling in love that is
kaga you make it through thewards.
Uh, in front of you is the thelore worm kind of her.
Back is to you all.
She's managing the defenses.
She's this will hold them for awhile, but they will break
through eventually.
What do you have planned,Chester?
(07:13):
Where's Ekrem?
Ekrem is, and.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
I turn around and I go wait.
Oh, am I part of thedistraction?
Speaker 2 (07:19):
No, no, you're back in the ward.
I'm like Ekrem.
No, she just threw him throughthe, did you?
No, you're back in the ward.
I'm like.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Ekram?
No, she just threw him throughthe.
Oh okay, Did you just like?
You know what?
Speaker 3 (07:26):
I see where this is going to go.
I'm just going to move myselfin.
I just kind of assumed that.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I would follow.
Oh, ekram, you're looking forEkram.
Ekram was actually just rightbehind me.
Let me turn around and addresshim.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Ekram, how are you doing back?
What the fuck do I do?
I got to fight Kaga, but Idon't.
Oh beans and dip.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
So we are staying loyal to the to the dragon.
Yes, I will use.
Speaker 3 (07:52):
Well, I'm thinking this through as we plan because
I don't want.
Ok, hear me out.
Oh, this is Tyler, not correct.
This is Tyler, ok, sorry.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Ekrem.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
Or I guess it is Ekrem's internal monologue.
It's like okay, so we're notbetraying, but we also want them
to think that they're gettingthe jump on the Lord dragon.
So I will use message tomessage the dragon and say
basically as brief of a summaryof like they just gave us
daggers.
Kaga is going to be in heresoon and she has betrayed you.
(08:24):
And then I'll like flash thedagger, like slide a hand, if
that'll work, okay, and then belike shit's going to go down.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
But we have your back thank you for telling me all of
this.
Now go ahead and do it.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Agro, I was talking yeah, she wasn't messaging you.
Yeah, you're like I can hearthese thoughts.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Why are you doing this?
Speaker 3 (08:43):
do I need to do the slide a hand for the dagger?
Speaker 1 (08:45):
um, so basically what's happening is she's got
almost like a wall of uh orprismatic wall in front of uh.
You guys, you have the passwordso you can move through it
because she trusted you ortrusts you.
Um, in theory, kaga can movethrough it too, until we find
otherwise.
Um, but you can send thatmessage.
Yeah, uh, kaga can see you.
(09:05):
So if you're trying to be subtlewith this like, think of it
like that scene in episode onewhere Obi-Wan Kenobi's like on
the other side of that wall.
So you want to go ahead and dothat slight hand yes, and that
is a seven.
So let's see against herperception.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
Not great.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
You just hear from the other side of the wall.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
You, but I had inspiration from a couple
sessions ago.
Are you going to use it?
I was lying about that.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
But now that you've confirmed it, I will.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
See what you got bud, oh shit, all right, send it.
I did a real life deceptioncheck.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Okay, that's a 14 with my bonuses.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
But I got double inspiration From that time.
I saved that orphan.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
I got you a meat stick that you bought us.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
Yeah from Hitler.
Remember when I did that bighero moment.
You saved an orphan from Hitler, I did.
You saved a meat stick that youbought us.
Yeah from Hitler.
Remember when I did that bighero moment.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
You saved an orphan from Hitler.
I did.
You saved a meat stick fromHitler.
Yeah, I was like, oh, I'm goingto eat this Slim Jim.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
Whatever gets me that other role Okay.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
You dumb, dumb bastards.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
I messaged Chester.
Still pretend to be on her sideyou're gonna stab acro?
Speaker 1 (10:28):
no uh the loreworms, like this was always a
possibility.
Well, there's no accounting forher choices.
Speaker 3 (10:46):
Very calm about this I appreciate that about you.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
You see a lot when you're the embodiment of time.
I thought I was going to be alot more subtle, so I'm very
embarrassed.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
Yeah, no, you see her .
Speaker 1 (10:58):
She is just slamming this axe.
You see cracks starting to formin this wall of, as if almost
just her rage.
We should handle that.
And strength can break thisdown.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Once she starts swinging it, I'd like to go
ahead and spear tackle her Likerun toward the barrier.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
You're going to run out of the barrier?
Speaker 2 (11:16):
Yeah Well if she's swinging it at the barrier.
I'm inside of it.
It feels like the problem isoutside the barrier.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
Okay, go ahead and let's do an opposed athletics
check.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
I'll let you do that before we do initiative 16 total
.
All right, she got an 18.
So go ahead and describe it tome here.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Yeah, I was just kind of hoping to catch her because
she hits it, swings it back up,trying to break down the barrier
with her axe On the backswing.
I'd like to actually come andcatch her, because that's just a
straight up, very open pose.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Okay, yeah, you know what, since you described it
that way, go ahead and haveadvantage on that.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Okay, all right, I have a pretty good athletic, so
let's hopefully it's above it.
No, it's worse.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Okay, Uh, so you go and do this spear tackle, Uh,
you wrap your arms around herand you, for a second, begin to
just drive her back away fromthis wall and uh can I seize
that opportunity to use my staffof power to create a wall of
force where she was hitting it?
To like bolster that wall yeah.
(12:28):
You know that's not how.
That's fun though I'm going tosay go ahead and make an Arcana
check.
If you beat a 15, you're goingto reinforce that wall where
it's been starting, thatprismatic wall where it's been
cracked.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
Is it Arcana?
Yeah, fucking 15 on the dice.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
Doesn't even matter what my bonus is.
So immediately, chester is nowon one side of it.
You have sealed off effectivelythat cracks that were forming.
You see again these cultistsjust throwing themselves against
it, just trying to breakthrough Just through sheer
numbers.
The lore dragon or the loreworm behind you is well, chester
certainly is impetuous.
Let's see what we can do tohelp with that.
(13:08):
Ekrem, do you by chance haveany means of reaching Chester
through there?
Can you get to him?
Chester through there?
Can you get to?
Speaker 3 (13:25):
him Out of character?
Would I know what could andcould not pass through?
Speaker 1 (13:31):
So, right now, anything that you do, she will
allow to pass through.
Oh yeah, if you have a magehand or something she'll be able
to pass it through, yeah, soyou want me on the other side
with you want me physically, youcan stay here, okay cool and
that's great.
Speaker 3 (13:43):
I'm much better here Now that I think about it.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
I think he'll be fine and then she casts Fly on you
so you can now fly, and she alsosays give this to our boy, it
should level the playing field alittle bit.
And she throws you a potion,and it's going to be a potion of
(14:05):
cloud giant strength, nice, oh,what the fuck.
So, uh, let's go ahead and rollsome initiative here.
Oh, fucking kaga, wow, okay.
So apparently okay, she doeshave advantage on initiative
(14:26):
rolls.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Never mind, you guys are back to being screwed, all
right.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
I got a 22.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
17?
Okay, so 17, 22.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Also 17.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
Also 17.
All right, and then thecultists are going to go on
initiative count.
Okay, those will go at the veryend.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
All right.
Speaker 1 (14:41):
Ekrem, what would you like to do?
Speaker 3 (14:43):
Well, I will fly up to the top of the dome and then
throwing Chester the potionwould be an action.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
I would say that we'll make that.
That'll be a free action, it'sjust kind of a toss.
Speaker 3 (15:00):
Okay, is Chester in a position to catch it?
Speaker 1 (15:03):
He'll have to make a athletics or an acrobatics check
to catch.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
Are you feeling frosty?
Yep, okay, I will chuck it.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
All right, give me a heads up or anything.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, just bink.
Speaker 3 (15:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
Off my body.
Oh fuck, I didn't tell him.
I was like, oh, that was theonly one.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
Nat 20.
Speaker 3 (15:22):
Okay, he catches it with his mouth.
Yeah, 31.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Five giant strength.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
Oh no, hang on.
I did that with the ticket, soit would be plus seven.
It's a Nat 20.
Yeah, 27.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
Yeah, okay, 27.
Fantastic, I'm going to evensay, just with that, 20, you're
going to drink it in your turn,so you'll be able to have the
potion.
You won't even have to try totake it Nice.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
It looks like when somebody wins a race, just yeah.
No, he just got Gatoraded.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Yeah, your already impressive physique just swells
more.
You get all veiny vascular asbook.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
Oh no, it's a potion of dehydration.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
And then I'm assuming we haven't had any sort of rest
or anything in between?
No, you won.
We haven't had any sort of restor anything in between?
No, I will use all but the lastpoint of my staff of power to
cast Fireball from the staff inthe biggest cluster of cultists
I see.
Okay, that doesn't includeChester.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
That would be so funny, unless.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
I hit like I think Chester's worth like four
cultists, so if I can get four,more, you actually get six more
cultists if you just drop itright think Chester's worth four
cultists you actually get sixmore cultists.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
If you just drop it right on Chester, if that can
entice you, you can get six morecultists.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
Actually, that potion of Clouddryer and Strength very
flammable.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
It's just moonshine.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
We lied to him it's just hooch, go ahead.
They've got to make their dexsaves.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Yes, they do.
And while you do that, Cultistsare notoriously dexterous.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Except for they all have drone 20.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
All right, that clump of cultists is going to roll
their dex saves.
Go ahead and roll your damage.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
I was trying to remember how many d6s it is.
A fireball's worth 8, d6.
, 8d6.
, 8d6.
And that's a lot of fours.
That's 30 damage, okay.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
So they'll take 15.
Speaker 3 (17:09):
All of them passed.
I ruled it as a swarm.
How about you think that over?
Speaker 1 (17:16):
No.
I gave you inspiration and thenyou made up a story about orphan
saving.
So that fireball hits it doesthin out uh the pocket of um
cultists and they are going tobe taking uh like a turn off to
kind of like regroup themselves,to kind of collect uh
themselves.
Kaga meanwhile just like justshrugs it off again.
(17:38):
That how much damage?
You say, uh, that was 30, 30.
Yeah, she uh effectively justkind of again just smoking a
little bit, just like.
All right, so it's going to be,she braces herself, it's going
(18:00):
to take a couple swings at youthere, chester.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
That makes sense the spell I was going to wrap it up
with is actually a full actioninstead of a bonus action, so
that's a bit of a goof on my end, yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
It would have been very helpful.
It would have been pull Chesterout of danger.
Speaker 3 (18:14):
No, but it would have introduced another danger.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Yeah, All right, so that's not fun.
All right, so 20 hit.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
How about a 24?
Also, yes, all right, how doyou want to do this bud?
Let's see Where's my D12?
Die Softly?
Nope, I don't, we don't, wedon't.
So that's five, it's going tobe 19.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Slashing damage as that axe cuts into you on the
first hit.
Speaker 3 (18:54):
You're doing great, sweetie.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
And then that's going to be another 21.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Ooh, we're not doing fabulous.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
So 21 damage and then 19 damage.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
Huh, yeah, I look pretty rough, but I'm here, all
right.
Speaker 1 (19:19):
Then she just kind of looks at you and she goes you
don't understand.
Do you know how many loved onesI've had to lie to and say this
is I'll save them, just toreset and have to do it all over
again?
Speaker 2 (19:41):
But that's the point of them.
You get to enjoy them, you getto have them, even if they go
away.
They're never really gone.
I can't believe you don't seethat with all your trips around,
you think it's all aboutsuccess.
Failure is just as much of lifeas success.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
Okay the way we're going to do this, because not
only are you fighting herphysically and she is just a
specimen of destruction.
It's almost like I made a statblock and was just like yeah,
I'll learn from that.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
I don't like that Personally.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
But this is also like I mean.
You see, she is conflicted.
This is a person that was toldshe could save reality and then
has just failed time and timeagain and watched people fail,
watched specifically you twofailed time and time and watched
people fail, watchedspecifically you to fail time
and time again and had to undoeverything.
(20:46):
Watch, uh, her loved ones reset, but she knows what happens to
them.
All that go ahead and you'regoing to make a um persuasion
check here to kind of appeal toher better nature.
Now, this is going to have ahigh DC.
It's going to be a 20.
Okay, if, on each consecutiveone, if you choose to kind of
(21:09):
take some time to do this,either of you, we're going to
just keep dropping that DC.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
Ekrem's not really a redemption guy, then you can be
like I'm going for the kill, allright, okay uh, yeah, I gave a
little speech about how youshould enjoy the people and
that's kind of the point andpersuasion.
Nine okay.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
Well, she doesn't seem like convinced.
You do know that it's like someof your words are getting
through and so she kind of shejust looks again like that weary
, like she's just tired of this.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
And you said she's upset because she was told she
could save everybody and hasfailed.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
She's seen every time faith get trusted in saviors
and they have let people down,and she's had to basically be
the stopgap, resetting thisreality.
Every time, her and the loreworm, and every time she
remembers what's happened, buteveryone else around her doesn't
.
Okay, okay, that's going to beyour turn, chester okay um,
(22:26):
that's gonna be your turn,chester.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
Uh, non-lethally throwing that up top.
Uh, yep, uh, you're a morehonorable man than me?
Speaker 2 (22:29):
yes, uh well, luckily I'm a fighter, so I can
non-lethally punch the shit outof people you can't non-lethally
fireball a lot of folk.
Uh, I'm gonna go ahead and, uh,unarmed striker, uh does a 19
hit, sure does okay.
Uh, then a 31, okay, okay, uh,and I'm gonna, I'm gonna hit
like like, like rib shots, youknow, like rocky uh getting down
(22:49):
there.
So the for my first 17 plus 10,27 fantastic, right and go
ahead and roll your surges.
Okay, and the whole.
While I'm like you think no onewants to fail, but it's
necessary, it has to happen.
(23:11):
The good has to have the bad.
You know these things.
And then it was 16 and nine.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
Okay, fantastic.
So nothing happens.
Happens, but you do feel thatmagic starting to glow.
Ekram, what would you like todo?
The cultists are regrouping,they are amassing to take
another push okay.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
well, I'm going to see that things are not going
phenomenal right now and I willhold out my hands as darkness
rolls from my eyes and I catchthe darkness with my hands as I
fall to the ground and when Islam the ground, I summon a
spirit of death behind thecultists.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Okay, oh dear, you're just in the shadows behind you.
You're like yes, so close.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
So close, still not talking to you.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
I feel like when you say you don't talk to me, but
you acknowledge.
I feel like this is talking.
It's not Tomato, tomato.
Speaker 3 (24:09):
It follows an action.
My action will be to command itto attack Kaga.
It does basically three thingson its first turn.
The first one is I can choose acreature for it to haunt, which
will be Kaga.
Kaga will need to pass a DC 15wisdom check or be haunted.
Speaker 1 (24:32):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (24:33):
So that's first thing .
Speaker 1 (24:37):
DC 15?
.
Speaker 3 (24:38):
Yes, all right, she passes, she passes.
Okay, so the haunt effectsdon't happen.
It has multi-attack equal tothe number, the spell level in
half, so two attacks.
I guess that's the incentive tocast at a higher level.
It's a weird spell, I like it alot.
And then for every cultist itmoves through to get to Kaga
(24:58):
they take a d10 of force damageokay, so I don't know your force
damage.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
I don't know how many it can pass through it's got 30
feet of movement, it could passthrough that swarm?
Speaker 3 (25:08):
it does, but each person it passes through counts
as rough terrain.
Okay, so I'm basicallystrategically placing it to
where it can pass through andget to kaga can it be doing like
midwest, like?
Oh, oh yeah yeah, just like.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
Oh, it's so cold um oh, I feel like gooses.
Speaker 3 (25:26):
Oh, there's a breeze under my robes and then its
first reap attack got an 18 tohit.
Okay, we'll let that hit.
And then the second to hit gota 11.
So I'm guessing that one's notgoing no, that one won't.
So the one that hits will donine necrotic damage.
(25:49):
Okay, and that will be my fullaction is to summon that Reaper.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
All right, um right, the lore worm, uh, she's going
to take a her lair action andshe's just going to look at you,
ekrem, and be like do youremember a time when you felt
really good, think about that.
(26:17):
And she's going to basicallycast the equivalent of a long,
or give you the equivalent of along rest oh shit cool hell yeah
and then for chester, glad Ijust completely blew my load on
those last two rounds uh, youare going to get basically the
same thing, except this time,like you're going to be able to
(26:40):
basically take a short restequivalent of burning your hit
dice, since you're on the otherside of the prismatic wall.
So you can give yourself the hitdice heal, she's going to take
that axe and again prepareherself to kind of do a backhand
swing at you.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
All right, 28 hits, 30 hits.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
I'll tell you stories all right, all right 15 damage
and 15 damage, so 30 damage I'mgonna look at the dragon and be
like do that to him.
I was doing fine, I was justmissing spell slots To see all
that faith every time she placesin you two, and every time
(27:29):
you've disappointed her.
Don't you ever get tired offailing?
And that's going to be yourturn.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Chester kind of ruminates on the fact that he
has been more or less kind oflike a failure his entire adult
life.
He had all this promise growingup as a boxer and you know he
got a bit of a.
(28:03):
You know the hometown hero.
People are rallying behind himand all of his successes have
come through like dumb luck andother people's failings, and uh,
and then his mind shifts to allthe good times he's had, all
the, the drinks with friends,the, the nice meals, the
(28:26):
training sessions, and uh, helooks up at kaga and he's like I
haven't failed.
I, I might be a failure, I'vefailed.
I might be a failure, I'vefailed in the past.
But you get up again and it'salso about the people around you
(28:47):
.
You should know this.
The moments that you get,that's the truly important thing
.
You might be the most blessedof us all if you get to relive
that over and over again thelaughter of a friend that you've
lost.
Once you get it again, thatfeels like it should be mighty
powerful.
(29:08):
Uh, and I hope you can see that, uh, and I'm gonna try to like
wrestle, like, like, punch her,like, wrestle and like, try to
like punch her, punch her wriststo get the axe out of her hands
.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
All right, go ahead and make that persuasion check
and that DC has been dropped.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
Wait, I got it Actually.
Can I go back and just goEnglish or Spanish?
Speaker 1 (29:34):
All right, Persuasion check of fucking three somehow
in words she's like she heardI'm a failure and she's like,
yeah, charlie brown, speak afterthat all right, go ahead to
(29:55):
grab our uh, I'm.
Let's do this as just acontested strength throw or a
strength check to see if you canwrassle the blood axe out of
her hand.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Okay, you said strength check, Yep, okay 23.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
She rolled a 20.
Speaker 2 (30:12):
On the die yeah, oh, that's nice for her.
Yeah, that's great.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Again hyper-competent , this Kaga, yeah.
So you've got to kind of grabthis out of her hands and she
wrenches it free.
Go ahead and give me an insight, check Ten.
You can't tell the emotionreading her face Like this is
again just a stoic person.
(30:37):
You can tell there's somethinggoing on behind that mask of
just kind of anger and fury, butyou're not sure quite what.
All right, the cultists, theones that aren't like oh, this
is breezy on my tokens, weshould really wear something
under these robes.
Feels like death.
They're going to go ahead andagain just charge at this wall,
(31:01):
kind of trying to break it down.
Give me a high or low.
Speaker 2 (31:04):
Low.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
Alright, they make it through the second part of the
wall and just kind of go up inflames.
Oh, just incinerated instantly.
Speaker 3 (31:18):
I was about to do something drastic but, it seems
like we might be, maybe not.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
Alright, ekrem, what would you?
Oh, I'm sorry, that would bethe Lord Dragon's option.
She looks at you again, chester, and she's gonna cast a heal on
you.
So, chester, I don't want totell you you're doing poorly,
(31:49):
but it would be very nice if Ididn't have to keep doing this
Same page baby.
Yeah, so, oh wow, it justregains you 70 flat hit points,
oh shit.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
All right, I do the Henry Cavill like, clock my arms
.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Yep, all right, ekron , what would you like to do?
Speaker 3 (32:09):
Okay, so there's cultists that have breached the
wall.
They're at the second.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
So a prismatic wall has basically Roy G Biv levels.
Yeah, they're through the firenow.
How many cultists are left?
This seems like there's just astream of them coming in.
Speaker 3 (32:29):
I'm thinking about doing something very drastic.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
Well, don't talk about it, Be about it.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
Well, here's the thing.
I don't know if it's toodrastic for the situation To
save existence.
That's kind of what I'm gettingat.
Okay, I delete existence.
I will as a free action.
Can I message Chester?
Speaker 1 (32:51):
What's the spell, say , that's a good.
Speaker 3 (32:54):
I thought it was my power.
Oh, you tell him, okay, yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:57):
I thought you meant casting message the cantrip.
Speaker 3 (33:00):
Can you get behind the wall?
Speaker 2 (33:04):
The prismatic the wall, the prismatic wall, the
prismatic wall, the wall forgetting to safety is essentially
what I'm telling you to do.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
I think so, and since he didn't use his movement, can
he try and go for it?
Speaker 1 (33:18):
And since he didn't use his movement, can he try and
go for it?
You know, I'm going to just saywe're just going to do an
athletics off to see if you cando this with Kaga not getting an
opportunity attack against you.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Okay, I mean I trust Akram, I'll take the opportunity
attack.
I did roll a natural 7, plus 11, 18.
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Okay, she's going to take a swing at you.
I did roll a natural 7.
Plus 11.
18.
Okay, she's going to take aswing at you.
Yeah, that's going to hit.
All right, you're going to take18 damage as that axe cuts into
you, slaying a nice sliceacross your back.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
I don't like that.
Speaker 3 (33:54):
My body hurts a lot, but do you make it to the other
side?
Do I die?
Speaker 1 (33:59):
Yeah, Maybe Do I, but do you make it to?
The other side.
Do I die?
Yeah, Maybe Do I.
No, you make it across Again.
She's been kind of protectingyou from this.
Speaker 3 (34:06):
I actually reach out to that entity in my head and I
say, hey, I know that you don'thave much faith in me, but fuck
you, I'm not going to fuck thisup this time as I fly into the
crowd and break the staff ofpower over my knee in the group.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
All right.
What happens if you break astaff of power?
Speaker 3 (34:28):
However many charges there are left, which is
currently one.
I call it snapping into a SlimJim so it was one, but it resets
every day, so I didn't rollwhen the next day rolled over
and I got a six, so it actuallyhas seven charges left on it.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
But didn't you spend them all on a fireball just a
few minutes ago?
Speaker 3 (34:47):
No, because when I was doing that, I thought I had
11 charges.
So I spent 10, but I neverre-rolled to get them back for
the crossover of the day.
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Okay, so it works out as seven.
Okay, I see what you're doing.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
So anything within 10 feet take eight times the
number of charges in the staff,so eight times seven worth of
damage.
Speaker 1 (35:12):
Quick Tyson.
How many is that?
56.
Damn it, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
Everything 11 to 20 feet takes six times, and
anything 21 to 30 feet takesfour times.
Speaker 2 (35:21):
Okay, I will admit, as soon as he started saying
numbers, I knew you guys weregoing to throw to me.
I was like all right, Okay.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
So you take that damage too, though, right
Correct.
Speaker 3 (35:32):
But I also have a 50-50 chance on a percentile
dice to warp to another plane ofexistence.
Speaker 2 (35:40):
Oh, what the fuck.
Speaker 3 (35:42):
So, but I'm going to kill all of these cultists, okay
.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
So you deal 56 damage .
Mm-hmm.
Go ahead and roll your dice myoh, the percentile.
Speaker 3 (35:54):
Yeah, yes, that's a 96.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
So Okay, I guess we should have established yeah,
yeah, yeah, you should havesubstantiated which the higher,
the low uh, let's do higher, low, pick, higher low.
Not now you're gonna roll again.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
Oh damn it, cabin, you're bad at this, yeah pretty
easy.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
I put real high pretty high.
Speaker 3 (36:15):
I'll do high again, to which I got a 63 63.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
I'm sorry.
36.
Speaker 3 (36:25):
I read it backwards.
That's on me.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
You warped to the plane where all the other
cultists Were like, drinking MaiTais and shit.
Speaker 1 (36:34):
Goo, monster Like a Throg, not alone Throg, not
alone Throg.
Find pretty haired.
Nope, chester, you see you'vedived through this but to your
(36:56):
surprise you've seen Ekram kindof take your place in front of
Kaga and smash this axe or smashthis staff of power.
Just blinding light just kindof makes it so you have to turn
away and in that place I'm justgoing to roll here, pick high or
low, low, low, low, let's golow high or low Low.
(37:21):
Let's go low.
You see the corpses of cultists, but you see no sign of Ekrem
or Kaga.
Speaker 3 (37:31):
Silver lining, since I got warped to another plane of
existence.
It says I avoid the damage.
So jokes on them.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
So, with that said, your best friend is gone, ekrem,
you find yourself drifting in asea of stars, and that's where
we'll end this episode.
Speaker 3 (37:57):
I sure hope we fucking won.
There's more to do all right,guys.
Speaker 1 (38:03):
That is it for this episode.
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