November 2, 2024 • 45 mins
Today I'm joined by the wonderful Megan Beautiful Papas (all is revealed in the episode!). Megan is not only a wonderful broadcaster, but an amazing Mama Bear to two beautiful children. With the news this week that I'm expecting my second, I wanted to get Megan on to talk about how she juggles career and motherhood, and we end up bonding over our birth experiences and the insecurities that arise with being a mother.
About the show:
Life is fast. Information is overwhelming. We seem busier and more anxious than ever. Introducing ‘Slow It Down’. A time to chill, wind down and join a space that inspires people to live authentically and slow it down. A hub for living more consciously and incorporating mindful practices and rituals in an achievable way. The aim is to showcase guests who have chosen to live a more balanced lifestyle mixed in with experts who offer tangible tips and tricks to feel a little more zen.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
With the Heads Podcast Network. Hello, welcome back to Slow
It Down.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
I am your host, PJ Harding, and a bit of
a special episode this week.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
I Guess.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
I always want to be really honest and transparent on
this podcast, and this podcast is a reflection of where
I'm at in my life to be honest, and this
week I got to announce some very exciting news that
my husband and I are expecting our second baby in April.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
We obviously have our two year old Charlie.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
And I am seventeen weeks so long, and I am
not good at keeping secrets, so this feels very freeing
to be able to open up about it. So I
wanted to do a special episode, still in the Slow
It Down style, but talking about babies, going from one
to two, balancing mother and Korea, confidence after having babies
(01:04):
and being back in the workforce, the impact that has
on your relationship, and just a really honest chat about
I guess, the insecurities that arise after starting a family
and taking a backstep in your career. I'm joined by
radio host Meghan pop Us in this episode, and we
(01:26):
have quite the history after both working together on ZM
and now transitioning into the hits, So I thought Meghan
would be perfect to get on just to chat about
this phase of my life and hopefully this can help
other people in a similar situation. But Meghan is so
generous with their time and honest, and we get quite.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Deep towards the end of the episode.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
But as a mom of toe working doing the juggle,
I think this is a really powerful episode and I
hope you get something out of it. Well, welcome to
the podcast, Meghan Beautiful pop us.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Thank you PJ did to me harden. We need to
clarify what's going on here.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
So I may or may not have not saved Meghan'
zumba on my phone for a very long time. I
need you to know that messaging is not my main
form of communication. And I just I'm so guilty of
not saving numbers on my phone and I'm always like
playing Giso.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
But now you were safe. My old way to live?
Is it fix you? And You're just like, who's this? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (02:34):
And I got back and I'm like, okay, reference point
two years ago.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Oh it's Melissa. Because I called you for something on here,
I'm so sorry, rude.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
But now because I've called you Meghan beautiful, papas it
comes up in b so I'm always like, the.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Hell is Megan Bee? I know? And yours comes up
with something weird because it's like PJ did to me.
I'm like, I need to change that.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
Yeah, Meghan, and my history kind of spans back to
I think I was twenty fifteen or no, no, twenty thirty.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
Yeah, when did you first move to z It is
twenty thirteen. I think it was something around then. Yeah,
And we.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Were sort of the opposite end of the days on
the radio station, and.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
It was really cool, like we got to have a bit.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Of a family vibe and there was this cool kind
of connection between the morning and afternoons, which was really nice.
Speaker 1 (03:27):
And it's funny now because we've ended up in the
same spots. We're on the same station again, just a
little bit old and drive, yeah, I know, with babies
in the mix and not probably not partying as hard
as were used to.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
No, life looks a little bit different, And that's exactly
why I wanted to get you on, because you are
a working mama and I feel like you always have
your shit together because when I look at you, I'm like, man,
it's just gone.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Everything balanced is that an accurate Maybe I need to,
like I need to put some more of the bad
shit on social media maybe, But I mean when you come.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Into work, like I just feel like you're quite an
organized person. Would that be a fear a fear.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Statement only because I married a very organized person. So
he runs a very tight shit, my husband. So he's
kind of just pulled me into line when I met him,
Like my car was the car that was full of
rubbish and like he didn't want to get into it,
and I was just I was a hot mess functioning,
(04:33):
hot mess yuse But he has helped me out a
little bit, I think. So now we are very structured
with how we like parent and just everything. We're very organized. Really,
I can't handle the passive aggressive comments I get if
I don't have you got to the catch and have
you got one of those really.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Like super detailed roster on your fridge roster.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
But we've got a calendar. I've got like a month calendar,
and everything's kind of like okay, just big things so
we know where we're at. But yeah, we're pretty organized.
I mean that doesn't kids don't like they don't understand
that though, So you can be as organized as you like.
Shit will still fall apart. They'll still shit themselves when
(05:21):
you're trying to leave the house. They'll still have a
tantrum about whatever clothes you want them to wear. All
of that stuff still happens. Just you know, you feel
bad filming that and putting it on social media when
they're screaming at you. Yeah. Have you always wanted to
be a mum? Yeah? Do you know what? I probably
kept its secret for a long time. I used to
make jokes and be like, oh, I'm not ready to
(05:42):
be a mom, I'm too selfish. Yeah, but like, deep down,
I always did want I knew I wanted to be
a mom of two. I hoped it would be a
girl and a boy. And I was one of those
people that was like, I'm gonna have babies by the
time I'm twenty five. That obviously didn't. Haaven was divorced
at twenty eight.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
We're here for the live details, So yeah, slightly, of course,
But yeah I did.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
I did. But I feel like you try and keep
your plans quiet when you're a woman, and when you're
like in you know, a serious career that you've worked
your way up to for years and years and years,
you get to a point where you're like, I don't
want to tell everyone because how is that gonna away
fit my life? You know, we all have that in
the back of our mind. You sure you do piece
(06:30):
one hundred percent. It's wild And when like, did you
have a certain age when the urge really kicked in
and you're like, I really want to do this, but
I don't know how I'm gonna avigate this? Can I
can I actually even do both of these things at
the same time. Well, So my husband is ten years
younger than me, and when we got together, I was like, right,
(06:51):
if you're not like ready for kids, this is the age.
I was thirty five, I'm gonna be like doing this,
so you're either in or you're out. And he was
so obviously betweenty five, which is young. Sure, just straight
up with him. Yeah, And I see to him right
off the bat of like if you're not keen, then
you're out, and he is. He's very old. He's an
(07:11):
old soul, so he was always keen for that. But
as soon I was like, right, we're gonna get married
and then to give it a year and then we're
gonna have the babies of course, shit doesn't go to plan,
Like as soon as you plan your life out like that,
stuff doesn't happen. And so thirty five I was like, right,
I need to be getting onto this. And then we
had pretty much two years of trying to get pregnant
(07:35):
and it was just exhausting. So yeah, it was about
thirty five or like I knew when I wanted to,
but then it didn't happen. Really, I even knew that
you tried for two years and did you ever consider
going down the iv throad? So we did clomba fell
or someone who's been chlorophel treatment, no chloroform clomba. It's
(07:59):
a tablet you take to it's like fertility treatment you
do before you go down the road of IVF. So
we did four rounds of that and it just nothing
was happening. And it's like so upsetting when you're like, okay,
well I'm getting all the sussistance from fertility doctors and
I'm just not getting eggs growing, and so you're like, okay,
(08:22):
well my body sucks. And so we were like, okay,
we're gonna do IVF. We had it all jacked up.
We had the date we were going to pick up
the drugs, the injections, we'd done how to administer them,
We've gone through the whole shebang. I was literally going
to pick up the injections the day before it was
announced lockdown in twenty twenty. Oh my, And so anyone
(08:47):
who had started IVF treatment was allowed to continue, anyone
who hadn't started the drugs wasn't allowed to And I
was like, are you kidding me? So we were like,
we just gotta give up on that dream for now,
no way, and so yeah, and so then you just
keep trying. So when was that? There was like April
(09:08):
and then May we conceived, Oh my god, naturally. Yeah,
two years of like all this assistance, and I think
and I hate. I hated it when people said to me,
as soon as you can stop trying, Yeah, don't please,
don't even say that to anyone who's having fertility issues.
But it's it happened like as soon as we kind
(09:29):
of we got locked down. So we were at home,
we were not doing much. We were just like something
else to do, yeah, and we were just drinking, like
making banana bread and shit. And then happened. I was
drinking so much too, Like you not even hearings. Yeah,
and yeah, we got pregnant. So what makes me so sad?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
As when you go, there was something wrong with my
body and it's like a fifty to fifty, you know,
it's a fifty percent sheer, but the woman seems to
take the most guilt. It's like there's something broken about me.
But actually, hang on, there's two of you and the
whole party here.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, that's so true. And I think because it's happening
to your body too, like you kind of forget it
does take a toll on. Like my husband was taking
it really hard, but he has told me since he
tried to like just push it all down because I
was he felt like I was taking it worse. So
he's like, I can't fall apart because I need to
look after her. Yes, So like it af fixed both
(10:27):
of you, Like so yeah in different ways. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
And then so that was okay during lockdown, crazy wild
times you were still working in radio when you did
finally feel pregnant. How did that feel in terms of
like that whole expiration of your career. Did you kind
of like put that to the side, it didn't matter
(10:54):
too much, or you.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Know, we're like what am I gonna do? Ah, well,
I don't. I'd had a long lead in years, and
at the time I was like a bit younger, and
I was like, yeah, progressive women, we're gonna do this.
We're gonna do everything. I can do it all and
you can.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
But like.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Yeah, so I was like, yeah, I can do this.
I'm just gonna take three months off. And I did
do all of those things. But like in my mind
first child, I was like, we're gonna kill this. We're
gonna like, we'll have it all unlocked. The baby's going
to sleep, and you know, all of that kind of stuff.
And again, life kicks in and it kicks your ass
(11:37):
and gives you a reality check. So I wasn't too
worried about it. I was like, three months off, it'll
be sweet. Is it what you took three months off?
Speaker 2 (11:48):
And did you make that decision kind of early on
in the pregnancy.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
Yeah, because you know, like you're in a position where
you can't you can't just take a year off and
then expect to come back. Yeah, you know, and our
kind of job, it's outward facing, you know, like you
need to be there. Yes, So that was playing a
lot in my mind. A lot. So you went back
three months later, Yeah, and I was I was.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Breastfeeding, So I feel like it's still so tender three
months later. Like I had the luxury of not being
in a full time job at the time. I was
kind of I sort of caught radio for that point
in my life, and I just was kind of on
my own sort of clock doing social media jobs and
(12:35):
stuff like that.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
So I didn't which I loved Jason.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
I think he doesn't, but I, you know, I didn't
have that preciure to go back, and I just think
how tender I was three months you know, postparder.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
Do you look back now going that was? That was
pretty hard? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:55):
I do.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
But I did it again with my second child, so
like because I went back, and like, I don't want
it to be a whole with me because it was
a soon I made. But it was so I would
get up at three am because I was still breastfeeding.
It was like one feed during the night, and then
I'd get up at three am and I'd pump, and
then I'd go to work do the show. I tried to.
(13:21):
I tried to pump at work, but it's very hard
when you're doing stuff can't do it and someone.
Speaker 3 (13:26):
Excuse, oh god, I don't miss a noise, and.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
So yeah, then I'd have to like race home and
like feed and yeah, and then you have to instantly
and you get home, like switch into like mum mode
and you know, get the heels off, take your makeup off,
get into some you know. So in theory again, I
thought it would be great, but then when I did it,
I was like, shit, this is just like it's hard.
Like with Bastie, I was just my first my son,
(13:57):
my first one. I was just like vital flight. I
was just flailing. It was just and I hated breastfeeding him,
hated it.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
And well maybe that's I mean, look, I look at
you now with toe and I'm just saying, how do
you do it? Because I've I've got Charlie who's toddler,
and I just came back into work this year, and
I just thinks, how is she doing not just one,
but two?
Speaker 1 (14:22):
And now I'm obviously about to embark on that journey.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
But do you think that motherhood, You know, over time,
it does start to feel a little bit more natural
and you start to relax a little bit where you
were pretty uptight the first time around.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
That's the one thing I was going to tell you
is that the first time around is so scary because
you're like, oh my god, everything is new. You're doing
everything for the first time. So you're giving birth for
the first time, you're breastfeeding for the first time, or
feeding them however, and everything is like oh my god,
and I don't just keep them alive. Second time, you're like, oh,
(14:56):
I've done this before. Ah yeah, I got this. Like
especially you've got like, you know, a two year age gap.
It will come back to you and you'll just be like, oh,
it's all good and you're exactly right. Like the first
time around, I was so up tired about everything this time.
Maybe that's why I is like a little bit like
stroppy and can hold her own because she's just kind
of been left to figure it out a little bit.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yeah, I'm like, should be right, mate, should be right. Well.
I think a lot of people say about this second.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
One of my big fears, I mean, going into having
Charlie the first time and now going into a second
is the impact.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
On the relationship.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
And you know, when you're in the trenches, it's he's tough,
and when you're tired in this sleep deprivation? Do you
have any advice on that?
Speaker 1 (15:44):
Les? How were you? I don't know how personal you
want to get here, but it's like, how are you, guys?
How are you after Charlie?
Speaker 2 (15:54):
I mean, look, there were definitely tough times, but BJ
is a very hands on dad. I'm very the air
and yeah, and I think that really helps. And I
think I mean, look, I feel like lots of times
when you've got the sleep deprivation and you're really in
the trenches, it's pretty hard to assess.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
That time, like it's almost a bit of a write off.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
But once you come through, I just think it's really
important to communicate and just get on the same level
and like, and it takes a while to come back
to feeling human. And I think once you boys start
to feel a bit human again, then you can kind
of properly converse.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
But for a while, it's like so alien and I
know we're going to.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Go through that again because some people I've had some
comments to me, like I love a people who think
it's hard with one, Oh my god, Like it's just
about to you know, really kick off.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
It's not always something you just you just like ban
cut the sleep now, Like, yeah, you'll be fine. Honestly,
I think a lot of people say one is fine,
two is a million or whatever it is. But there's
two of you, there's two kids, like and it always
you know, it feels tough when they're a newborn and
(17:18):
they need you all the time. But like, now that
I'm out the other side of that, you can see
how fast it goes. It Like, I still feels like
a baby to me. She's just turned two, So like,
it goes so fast. You'll feel every single day, but
the year will fly by, you know. And then suddenly
as soon as they walk and stuff like, you can
(17:38):
like leave them to play with each other. And that's
the most incredible thing. They actually spend a lot of
time entertaining each other and I only have to jump
in when there's a fight and one is threatened. Yeah,
So like, honestly, until your bebt walks, you know that's
you're gonna be very hands on. But that can go,
like can some people walking at nights? They could go
(18:00):
in a year And then suddenly you know, you got
a little human and she I'm convinced it's a sheep.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
I'm convinced it's a sheet, but I don't know. Charlie
always goes girl, baby girl, Charlie, is it a baby
boy or girl? And he goes girl, but then sometimes
he'll say boy. Although today he freaked me out and
he goes baby gone and I was like what and
he goes, no, baby girl.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
Oh Jesus, Charlie, how have we never spoken about like
births and stuff.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
I don't know what was yours? Like both both emergency cesareans.
Mine was an emergency Caesar two. Yeah, welcome to the club.
But were you upset about it? Had you asked me
a week before, I would have thought I would have
been so gutted.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Uh. You know. I went in doing hypno birth thing
and I was like, this is going to be as
natural as possible.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
And I remember the night before going into labor Beja.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
I was like, hey, what happens if things work out?
Speaker 2 (19:00):
And I'm like, that's how you manifest bad things, and
like I went off and that was obviously the hall
bones because I was about to go into labor and
he was like, no, we just need a plan bing
and I was like, anyway, next day, go on to
labor at about seven o'clock at night and then Mom
(19:23):
came out, BJ went to sleep for a bit. Mom
and I were chilling in the bath, so I was
just trying to get comfortable. We left time at about
one am. I remember seeing two beautiful deer as we're
driving down. The driver I was like, oh my god,
it was like this really beautiful. Okay, this is this
is it. It was like a weird I don't know,
(19:44):
a good omen, I guess yeah yeah, and the omen
yeah fuck. That drive was horrendous, so bad. Why do
they not let you get on like all fours.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
And the car? That was all I wanted to do,
like harming over no farming.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
For one split second, we get to the hospital and
I thought, how many was I?
Speaker 1 (20:10):
How many? What's that? Oh my god? What I was dilated?
Is dilated? Yeah? Yeah, just all the terminology.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Is coming back. I want to say I was three
or four cinematas dilated.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Okay, and then quite halfway, no, I was it more
like it was it felt like a decent amount. And
and then it was like I was laboring quite quickly,
and it was like my midwife was like, all right,
it feels like we're almost on here. Then basically Charlie
got stuck posterior, horrendous, horrendous noises and sewed.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
But I look back with the roasters to glasses, I'm like,
let's do it again.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Again.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
But once it happened, you know, absolutely absolutely no regret
or shame or anything. I was just stoked. He was
alive and safe and well and that was all that mattered.
And I was like, what, I yes so much?
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Do you know what I mean? Yeah? Do you know?
And both times, like I tried so hard. I really
wanted to, like I don't know why. I don't know why,
befot's pressure myselfs And also it sounds horrendous. Anyone who's
had a bagetal birth, it sounds like painful.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
There are there are I think there are some really
blessed ones that I don't know, Like have you've seen
those YouTube? But it's like painfree and it's totally and
I wanted to do that.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
It's so not like me. But I wanted to do
the natural birth and I was going to breathe my
way through it. And then I was like amy joy
and then emergencies AIRI and I just cried and I
was like I don't want to and then we're like
everyone's going, well, the baby needs to just come out
in the safest way, and I was like fine, So
we did it. But the first time around it was
quite brutal because I needed to have a spinal tap
(21:52):
in the end because my epidural wore off, so I
couldn't feel anything from my nick down and I was
just like completely numb. But then I started to I
had to have pithadone. I don't even remember why, and
then I started shaking, and so I was pretty much
kind of out of it when my son was born.
(22:14):
So Andrew, my husband, filmed a video. I don't remember it,
but I was awake, but I'm so grateful that he
filmed when basically got put on me. Yeah, the only
thing I remember not seeing him, but I remember thinking,
get him off me because I'm gonna drop him because
I couldn't feel anything, and obviously they were holding him,
(22:34):
but my first thought was get him off me. He's
gonna fall on the floor. And that's all I remember.
So I'm so thankful that he's got a video of it,
because I actually spoke to him and I was like,
you know, I was like my baby, But I don't
remember any of that. Yeah, so it was like, really,
it was a really tough first outing. Did you when
(22:58):
you were pregnant first time? And now that you know
you're pregod second time? Have you googled more or less? Less?
Wildly less?
Speaker 2 (23:09):
And oh my god, I wish you could the voice
notes that I sent to my midwife the first time round.
Speaker 1 (23:15):
Yeah, You're like, is this normal? Is everything? Is this normal?
It's normal when coms a pleading, when I brush my teeth?
Am I dying? I've just haaid a kebab and I'm
worried that maybe do you think the kebab meat might
be a little bit funny?
Speaker 2 (23:29):
She's so like Rea suing every time I actually see
her my voice first voice message in a long time
this morning, just saying, oh wait, what did I say.
Speaker 1 (23:40):
Today? It is your resident, It's Teresa. I'm just be
strong because.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
I feel like I've even felt lots of kicks consistently.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
I feel like sometimes I do feel a lot of flutters,
and then I'm like, oh my god, should be feeling more?
Should I be showing more? I feel like I'm fed,
Like my belly is beat at this time, and it's
soft and not such.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
An obvious one, but I'm definitely bigger, and I'm sure
it is.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
It just doesn't feel very consistent in it.
Speaker 2 (24:06):
Sometimes I like, I don't know, is it almost been
coming to like chicken heartpet or do you think I
know something had happened?
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Next page?
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Also, the headaches have been awful this time around.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
Yes, So anyway, she's freaking amazing. She sent me back
in an amazing.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Reassuring voice message, saying, look, we don't even start monitoring
the kicks from like twenty five weeks.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
I don't need to be consistent because.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
I just felt like little flutters and bubbles and all
that kind of stuff. But I just can't remember last
like when I felt stuff last time.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
I think it's about around twenty weeks. You get kind
of consistent, Yeah, feelings did you feel in the second time?
The baby? Just like everything is softer. I just feel
like I did not look cute. I did not look
cute with my bombs. You think that, but you you do,
and like, just do I will I look back even
(25:01):
if you never put them anywhere. Just take photos of
yourself because I've got like a handful because I was
such a baby about it. Like, just take photos of yourself.
Just for your own thing, you know, but you're right,
Like the bump shows earlier. It's because your muscles and
everything are like they know what they're doing. They're right again,
everyone shows a bit earlier. Sometimes it's a bit lower,
(25:24):
like you know, you might find that something's I feel
like the shape of my stomach has changed, yes, like forever,
Like there's certain parts of you that might change forever.
Like my boobs are a bit saggier.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
So saggy, and I don't know how I'm gonna do
like they are like so si and like now they've
got like all koshy again.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
They've all got coshy again.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
And nice because I'm pregnant, but you wait till boast breastfeeding.
But it's just part of it, and it's part of
it and we have to, you know, embrace it because
what our body has actually created.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Is something that you wouldn't trade anything in the world. Yeah. Yeah,
you're amazing.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Oh I was going to talk about actually body confidence
just yeah, because it feels so trivial to be insecure
during a time where you're creating a human But it's
something I really struggle with continuing to be able to
be positive about. Yeah, and it feels so much trivial
(26:28):
when so many people have so many issues actually falling
pregnant in the first place. You hear, am I worried
about how my fucking leags look. It's just so stupid,
but I can't knock it out my head.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Yeah, but it's all relative to you, right, Like, how
do you okay? So, say you needed to go to
like some radio function and you need to get dressed up,
how initially, how are you feeling right now?
Speaker 2 (26:50):
I just don't have to dress myself because I feel
like I'm in the between bays, Like I don't look
good in the maternity gear, I don't look.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Good in normal gear, so I try the beggy stuff.
But I'm so sure and I just look stupid, like
I'm we're in a bag, you know.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
I think it's just that in between phase particularly, and
like because I've been keeping it on the d LO,
I haven't really fully been able to embrace the bump.
And it's just that kind of like your identity is
challenged quite a lot along the way. I think when
you're so fixated on how you were and you just
have to know that you just keep changing. But I
(27:25):
think this time I have the reassurance of I got
through it last time. I remember feeling like this last time,
but I remember coming out the other side and actually
running a half marathon, not straight a back like a.
Speaker 1 (27:37):
Couple of years ago.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
You know, your body does bounce back in time, however
that looks for you, and it's just taking it pressure off.
But it still doesn't mean that you have those body
image struggles along the way.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
Yeah, but you also don't like I don't like saying
bounce back. Hate doesn't need to know you body. You
never lost your body. It doesn't have to come back,
and it's probably not going to be the same. It
can be different, but it can still be strong and
it can still be And like I'm saying this to
you as someone who went through exactly what you're going
(28:15):
through and like didn't want photos taken of me and
was just like constantly feeling like you're a lump and
you know, like everything it's not only what you can see,
and it's not just like weight and stuff. It's the
fact that you're tired. It's the fact that your feet hurt,
it's the fact that your guns are bleeding, it's you know,
like it's all of the extra boobs and tenre yeah yeah,
(28:36):
and that so you're spelling and everything makes you feel sick,
and it's all of it all makes you feel gross.
It totally does. And I do find that there'll be
days where I am feeling better and I'm like, hang on,
why was I so harsh for myself yesterday?
Speaker 2 (28:50):
And even if I just do like a light work hard,
you know, I'm not like going hard out or whatever.
But when I do feel good in those moments, I'll
try and like member body more and I will find
that that does.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
Give me that boost of confident. And it's such a
mental mental thing, like the more you move, the more
you feel like you're actually nuturing your body. Then you
do you do wrap the benefits from it, but you
just need to slow it down.
Speaker 2 (29:17):
Well, actually, I well, this is where we get into
the podcast where we talk about the practices that you
like to do that you know will keep you saying,
because you're incredibly busy, you're working, you've got two little kids,
how does me again making beautiful puppaus stay sane in
the chaos?
Speaker 1 (29:38):
I mean the chaos. I remember going to my therapist
and I'm always like trying to get him to fix
my realities. And he's kind of just like you've got
to get comfortable in the chaos, like just breathe and
be like let it all flow around you. And like
that's so true with two kids. I'm trying to control
these little people who don't want to be controlled, and
(30:01):
so I'm trying, I said, so everyday thing, I'm trying
to just breathe and be like does this matter in
this moment? Does this matter? You're like fighting trying to
get shoes on because you've got to get out the door.
And I'm like, she's going in the car with barefeeta,
take the shoes, and like, does this matter if she's
not wearing what I wanted to wear, she's wearing a
(30:21):
hive's vest with her tutu and gum boots. Does it matter?
Notice that I always say she Okay, we found the
rebel in the duo, but like, honestly, just like be
comfortable in the manness. Because we used to always say
me and Andrew that we just need to get through this,
(30:43):
if we just get through this week, because every week
was busy, but then it never changed, like you just
constantly got stuff happening. So we tried to stop doing
that and just be like we're just comfortable. We just
need to breathe. Nothing is heart surgery in our life,
like we might be doing a podcast or you know,
(31:03):
like it's just yarning. Nothing is that important. We're not
saving lives for your sanity, you know. Yeah. And like
even because I had reflux, so she cried a lot
as a baby, and it would just you know, like
a crying baby is just so hard on your mental health.
(31:23):
And so for a long time, every time she would cry,
I'd just be really triggered and I'd kind of melt down.
And Andrew's like, she is okay, she's crying because she's
having a meltdown. She's safe, she's feared, she's got to clean,
like there's nothing wrong with her. Just like breathe and
take take a moment. Like I used to go away
(31:44):
and take a moment for myself even when she was crying,
Like she'd be in her cot and I'd go away
and I'd be like I need a moment for myself
just to like breathe and be like, Okay, go back
in there.
Speaker 2 (31:57):
She is safe, she is well feed, she's okay, she's crying. Yeah,
but you actually have to tend to yourself in those
moments or else, Yes.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
You're just praying from me, you can't cry, or you're
gonna you know, you're just gonna yell, or I don't know,
you're just gonna. It's not gonna be good for her
or good for you. So I just go away and
I go what matters in this moment? What matters in
this moment?
Speaker 2 (32:21):
Yeah, packing your battles, I'm learning now two year old,
that is very important.
Speaker 1 (32:26):
Who cares if he goes to be with an onion?
Is it hurting anyone?
Speaker 3 (32:28):
No?
Speaker 1 (32:31):
Oh my god?
Speaker 3 (32:32):
Why did they take weird shit?
Speaker 1 (32:34):
To be honestly? Now he has to take a dog
to the beard.
Speaker 2 (32:37):
So I'm like, okay, come on figgie, like it's my
only way of getting him to bed? Or does he
bring in the wheelbarrow? Does he bring in like freaking digger, whatever, it'll.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Get him to bed? And I'm like, am I just
being a push over mum? Probably? Nah? Like they just
attached to things like I has to go to sleep
with one of those Mowana Disney cards every night at
the moment, and then last night I took it off
her because I was like, well, I don't want to
stick to her mouth or something, so like took it
out once she'd gone to sleep, and then in the
middle of the night she wakes up and she's like, ah,
(33:08):
I was like, oh God, she can't find the card.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Like why can't they just like a cute little snugly
or she's got four bunnies in there with her cut
on one of him. Wake it's going to be hard
and random the object. But oh, it's so true. Like
I think we're all really guilty of the site going oh,
it'll be better win dot dot and it's just such a.
Speaker 1 (33:31):
Messious cycles get through this. Yeah, yeah, it will be.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
And maybe she's just gotta be like it's perfect now,
even though Bill's chaotic, it's actually perfect right now in
this moment, And I'm not going to have any other
moment like this, and I just have a freaking suck
it up because we will look back on these days
and we were just wish that we were more present.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Yeah, And like I always think of like me when
I was younger, and I like even just when we
were trying to get pregnant, how desperate we were for
a baby. We were just we were just like we
just like one will be enough if we can never
do it again. And we were just desperate and now
we've got him. And like also when we were like
(34:11):
doing broadcasting school and stuff, we were like, we're just
desperate to have this radio gig. And you get these
things and then you're like right next and you're don't
freaking appreciate it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. And like when
I stopped doing breakfast radio, like in the moment, you're like,
I'm so tired, it's so busy all this, and then
I stopped doing it for two years, and now that
I'm back here, I'm like, God, you need to appreciate this.
(34:34):
You need to stop breathe who cares about the early
mornings because you know you love it, Like, just appreciate everything.
And yeah, have you felt that since coming back?
Speaker 2 (34:48):
Now you've got your two babies, you care less about
the shit that you.
Speaker 1 (34:52):
Used to worry about pre babies.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
In terms of comparing yourself to other people in the industry.
Speaker 1 (35:01):
You want me to say, no, no, no, it's not.
Speaker 2 (35:04):
I want you to be honest, because I still do
and like, no, I thought that when you have babies
you stop caring about that shit. And yes, I think
you do stop caring about a lot of superfluous stuff
that you used to.
Speaker 1 (35:14):
See over Yeah, man, we still our brains still get
the bigger of us.
Speaker 2 (35:19):
Like I look back and I feel like I was
so much more successful in some ways a few years ago,
and I look at myself now and you're like, oh
my god, I.
Speaker 1 (35:31):
Have I gone backwards?
Speaker 2 (35:32):
But no, because when I was in that position, all
I wanted was what I've got right now. And it's
back to that not appreciating what you've got.
Speaker 1 (35:40):
Oh yeah, I couldn't everything you just said. Everything you
just said, because I obviously like left a show, and
I went through a whole period where I was like
do I want to put this on a podcast? When
I and I don't cry. I had a moment where
(36:02):
I was like do I regret this? And like I
had to fight to not regret having my child, and
I was like, have I ruined one thing and search
for another? And that's like, God, that's a lot, but
(36:23):
that's something that like women, I'm sure a lot of
women like think. And then now saying it out loud,
I feel so much shame because of course I don't
regret I know either, my babies are the best thing
and the best thing that's ever happened.
Speaker 2 (36:37):
And you'd never ever trade them in for the world.
But when your ego comes in from a career perspective
and progress, and if you're looking at how the world
perceives you looking inside you know, then you can't help
but compare yourself.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
But only you.
Speaker 2 (36:53):
Know what truly matters to you, like truly truly matters
to you. But I think because the so much validation
needed online and there's so much people proving how successful
they are all the time, you can't help but feel
dragged into that game.
Speaker 1 (37:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:13):
Yeah, when you know truly what brings you the most
joy is your family and your beautiful children. But when
you're feeling weaker, when you're feeling those days of insecurity,
you start having these Christians and you feel guilty a
one hundred percent of what you mean. But there's no
shame in that, because I think a lot of women
would have exactly the same moment.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
Yeah, and it is hard when you find so you've got.
I always think when your personal life is thriving, sometimes
your professional life is not, and vice versa. Like when
I was probably doing the best professionally I was like
having a meltdown. I was like having struggles with my relationship.
(37:57):
I'm like having fertility issues, Like I'm struggling to even
get out of bid to go and have laughs on
the radio. But I'm having the you know, prime of
my professional career and vice versa. You know, so you can't.
Speaker 2 (38:12):
I always come back to this quote, you can have
it all, but just not at the same time.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
Yeah, and you need to be happy with We don't
need to be happy, but you should try and find
the joy and everything you've got at each moment because
there is joy in each face one hundred and we
just have to do what we can to not look
no answer to that because I don't preach that kind
(38:39):
of stuff on that. Don't listen to that, but appreciate
what we've got in front of you. But still the
brain goes and I think, I think it is doing
things yet encourage your own self esteem and make you
feel better in yourself. So whether it is going to
your little pilates class, or whether it's surrounding for the
(39:00):
right people or doing you know, like positive informations which
to some people might send corny, but whatever it is
that you can do to come back to you're really
your strong place, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Where you are feeling confident in yourself and that looks
different for everyone.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
Yeah, I do. Like this is so corny, but like
I've started trying to because I've forever been the person
that would like look in the mirror, specially when you're
naked and be like ugh, saggy burt, or like say
horrible things to myself. But I remember saying to our
mutual friend Caitlin, I was like, don't talk to yourself
like that. Don't talk to my friend like that. And
(39:40):
I was like, I would never let anyone talk to
you like that. So I'm not gonna let you talk
to yourself like that. But then I'm guilty of doing
it to myself.
Speaker 2 (39:47):
I know you'll let your you won't get your friends,
but your best friend who should be you'll best friend you,
and you'll you'll say.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
The nastiest things to them. So stop being so nice.
I've tried to now, like before I have a shower,
be like, yeah, you're like doing well, you look like
your arms look strong at the moment, or like you know,
like yep, try and be kind to myself. This skin
looks clear or you know, because I'm also very conscious
(40:15):
of the impact I'm giving to both of my kids.
So we try and do like positive. We're very mirror positive. Yeah,
we try and like dancing from the mirror or be like,
you know, look cruel, you look cute, you look so cool,
look at your dance moves. Like everything is positive when
we look in the mirror, even if like I look
at it, I'm like, oh, insert nasti comment here about myself.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
You can turn it around us and you can do it,
and you actually can turn around you're thinking like you
if you do repeat these things over and over, you
do start to believe it, whether it's negative or whether
it's positive. I always love the I don't know. I
use this mancher the other day and it was like,
what if everything just works out? Like instead of going
into the day feeling like everything's just kind of shit,
what if everything just what if everything worked up for you?
Speaker 1 (41:02):
What if today? What if I don't make it in time?
What if I can't do this? If it like why catastrophizing?
That's quite cool? Yeah, what if everything just works out?
Like what if everything is actually just working in your favor? Okay,
I'm going to wrap this up with a bit of
advice that you give to your younger self going into
the Korea that.
Speaker 2 (41:20):
You were going into early twenties, What would you say
to young Megan, beautiful Pappas, don't let.
Speaker 1 (41:31):
Anyone dim your light, Don't let anyone tell you you're not
good enough, Like try and keep who you are always
in every moment. That is the most important thing. Like
just shine bright, speak loud, don't try and like make
yourself smaller for anything or anyone. This is what I
(41:52):
tell myself. And don't try not to care about what
you look like, because you look fucking great about it.
It's gonna stag and drop and expand, so enjoy it. Oh, Megan,
thank you so much for coming on today. I really
appreciate it for having me. Congratulations. I don't felt like
(42:16):
we didn't delve into your pregnancy enough. Well, I'm gonna
probably go into it too much over. I'm so excited
for you, and I know it's gonna be a girl.
I reckon, it's gonna be your power. But you're I
love you equally. Well.
Speaker 2 (42:35):
That was my episode with Megan Papas and I loved
Jenny with mes I feel like we could have gone
on for a very, very long time.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
Some powerful takeaways.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
That I got from the episode were basically choosing your battles,
is this worth worth actually stressing out and stepping back
at tacking of breath and just surrendering to the chaos
that is around you, but also pushing aside that mentality
of everything will be better when dot dot dot. We're
(43:06):
both obviously so guilty of just taking off things in
life like we Okay, you get this job, great, You've
wanted that for so long.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
What's next? You know? And I think in life we
are so programmed to do that, Okay, cool, I've done this.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
Now what instead of actually sitting there and enjoying the view,
sucking it all, sucking it all in, but you know,
really lapping it up and appreciating how far we've come.
But instead we're like Noah, next, next, next, next, next,
And then hearing Megan's raw honesty on what I'd say
(43:43):
a lot of women do feel when they I mean,
if you look at it on paper, your career takes
a backstep for a while when you go into that
role of being a mother, and you can't help but
have these feelings of what if you know, what if
I didn't do this, It doesn't mean that you love
your children any Yes, but it's the ego coming in
and trying to take over your mind. And it's just
(44:05):
been strong enough to know that you actually wanted this
the whole time, and it is the reality of making
that decision. There has to be a sacrifice that comes
with it. And I will always come back to the
saying you can have everything, that you just can't have
everything at once. And perhaps maybe this is taking you
(44:25):
on a greater path that you can't see right now.
This is like a diversion and all will make sense
down the track.
Speaker 1 (44:32):
Right now, it feels like you're behind.
Speaker 2 (44:34):
But once you step back and get to look at
the greater picture, then you'll be like, oh, no, I
did make the right choice, and you have to stand
firm with what feels right inside. That's my little it's
my little pep talk that I'm going to leave you
with if you've felt like you've been in a similar situation.
But I'm really really grateful for Megan coming on this week.
I'd love to know what you got out of this
(44:56):
week's special episode. I was slow it down. You can
always get in touch with me on Instagram at pj DJ,
and I'll be back next Sunday with another episode.
With the Heads Podcast Network. Hello, welcome back to Slow
It Down.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
I am your host, PJ Harding, and a bit of
a special episode this week.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
I Guess.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
I always want to be really honest and transparent on
this podcast, and this podcast is a reflection of where
I'm at in my life to be honest, and this
week I got to announce some very exciting news that
my husband and I are expecting our second baby in April.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
We obviously have our two year old Charlie.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
And I am seventeen weeks so long, and I am
not good at keeping secrets, so this feels very freeing
to be able to open up about it. So I
wanted to do a special episode, still in the Slow
It Down style, but talking about babies, going from one
to two, balancing mother and Korea, confidence after having babies
(01:04):
and being back in the workforce, the impact that has
on your relationship, and just a really honest chat about
I guess, the insecurities that arise after starting a family
and taking a backstep in your career. I'm joined by
radio host Meghan pop Us in this episode, and we
(01:26):
have quite the history after both working together on ZM
and now transitioning into the hits, So I thought Meghan
would be perfect to get on just to chat about
this phase of my life and hopefully this can help
other people in a similar situation. But Meghan is so
generous with their time and honest, and we get quite.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Deep towards the end of the episode.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
But as a mom of toe working doing the juggle,
I think this is a really powerful episode and I
hope you get something out of it. Well, welcome to
the podcast, Meghan Beautiful pop us.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Thank you PJ did to me harden. We need to
clarify what's going on here.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
So I may or may not have not saved Meghan'
zumba on my phone for a very long time. I
need you to know that messaging is not my main
form of communication. And I just I'm so guilty of
not saving numbers on my phone and I'm always like
playing Giso.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
But now you were safe. My old way to live?
Is it fix you? And You're just like, who's this? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (02:34):
And I got back and I'm like, okay, reference point
two years ago.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Oh it's Melissa. Because I called you for something on here,
I'm so sorry, rude.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
But now because I've called you Meghan beautiful, papas it
comes up in b so I'm always like, the.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Hell is Megan Bee? I know? And yours comes up
with something weird because it's like PJ did to me.
I'm like, I need to change that.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
Yeah, Meghan, and my history kind of spans back to
I think I was twenty fifteen or no, no, twenty thirty.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
Yeah, when did you first move to z It is
twenty thirteen. I think it was something around then. Yeah,
And we.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Were sort of the opposite end of the days on
the radio station, and.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
It was really cool, like we got to have a bit.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Of a family vibe and there was this cool kind
of connection between the morning and afternoons, which was really nice.
Speaker 1 (03:27):
And it's funny now because we've ended up in the
same spots. We're on the same station again, just a
little bit old and drive, yeah, I know, with babies
in the mix and not probably not partying as hard
as were used to.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
No, life looks a little bit different, And that's exactly
why I wanted to get you on, because you are
a working mama and I feel like you always have
your shit together because when I look at you, I'm like, man,
it's just gone.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Everything balanced is that an accurate Maybe I need to,
like I need to put some more of the bad
shit on social media maybe, But I mean when you come.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Into work, like I just feel like you're quite an
organized person. Would that be a fear a fear.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Statement only because I married a very organized person. So
he runs a very tight shit, my husband. So he's
kind of just pulled me into line when I met him,
Like my car was the car that was full of
rubbish and like he didn't want to get into it,
and I was just I was a hot mess functioning,
(04:33):
hot mess yuse But he has helped me out a
little bit, I think. So now we are very structured
with how we like parent and just everything. We're very organized. Really,
I can't handle the passive aggressive comments I get if
I don't have you got to the catch and have
you got one of those really.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Like super detailed roster on your fridge roster.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
But we've got a calendar. I've got like a month calendar,
and everything's kind of like okay, just big things so
we know where we're at. But yeah, we're pretty organized.
I mean that doesn't kids don't like they don't understand
that though, So you can be as organized as you like.
Shit will still fall apart. They'll still shit themselves when
(05:21):
you're trying to leave the house. They'll still have a
tantrum about whatever clothes you want them to wear. All
of that stuff still happens. Just you know, you feel
bad filming that and putting it on social media when
they're screaming at you. Yeah. Have you always wanted to
be a mum? Yeah? Do you know what? I probably
kept its secret for a long time. I used to
make jokes and be like, oh, I'm not ready to
(05:42):
be a mom, I'm too selfish. Yeah, but like, deep down,
I always did want I knew I wanted to be
a mom of two. I hoped it would be a
girl and a boy. And I was one of those
people that was like, I'm gonna have babies by the
time I'm twenty five. That obviously didn't. Haaven was divorced
at twenty eight.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
We're here for the live details, So yeah, slightly, of course,
But yeah I did.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
I did. But I feel like you try and keep
your plans quiet when you're a woman, and when you're
like in you know, a serious career that you've worked
your way up to for years and years and years,
you get to a point where you're like, I don't
want to tell everyone because how is that gonna away
fit my life? You know, we all have that in
the back of our mind. You sure you do piece
(06:30):
one hundred percent. It's wild And when like, did you
have a certain age when the urge really kicked in
and you're like, I really want to do this, but
I don't know how I'm gonna avigate this? Can I
can I actually even do both of these things at
the same time. Well, So my husband is ten years
younger than me, and when we got together, I was like, right,
(06:51):
if you're not like ready for kids, this is the age.
I was thirty five, I'm gonna be like doing this,
so you're either in or you're out. And he was
so obviously betweenty five, which is young. Sure, just straight
up with him. Yeah, And I see to him right
off the bat of like if you're not keen, then
you're out, and he is. He's very old. He's an
(07:11):
old soul, so he was always keen for that. But
as soon I was like, right, we're gonna get married
and then to give it a year and then we're
gonna have the babies of course, shit doesn't go to plan,
Like as soon as you plan your life out like that,
stuff doesn't happen. And so thirty five I was like, right,
I need to be getting onto this. And then we
had pretty much two years of trying to get pregnant
(07:35):
and it was just exhausting. So yeah, it was about
thirty five or like I knew when I wanted to,
but then it didn't happen. Really, I even knew that
you tried for two years and did you ever consider
going down the iv throad? So we did clomba fell
or someone who's been chlorophel treatment, no chloroform clomba. It's
(07:59):
a tablet you take to it's like fertility treatment you
do before you go down the road of IVF. So
we did four rounds of that and it just nothing
was happening. And it's like so upsetting when you're like, okay,
well I'm getting all the sussistance from fertility doctors and
I'm just not getting eggs growing, and so you're like, okay,
(08:22):
well my body sucks. And so we were like, okay,
we're gonna do IVF. We had it all jacked up.
We had the date we were going to pick up
the drugs, the injections, we'd done how to administer them,
We've gone through the whole shebang. I was literally going
to pick up the injections the day before it was
announced lockdown in twenty twenty. Oh my, And so anyone
(08:47):
who had started IVF treatment was allowed to continue, anyone
who hadn't started the drugs wasn't allowed to And I
was like, are you kidding me? So we were like,
we just gotta give up on that dream for now,
no way, and so yeah, and so then you just
keep trying. So when was that? There was like April
(09:08):
and then May we conceived, Oh my god, naturally. Yeah,
two years of like all this assistance, and I think
and I hate. I hated it when people said to me,
as soon as you can stop trying, Yeah, don't please,
don't even say that to anyone who's having fertility issues.
But it's it happened like as soon as we kind
(09:29):
of we got locked down. So we were at home,
we were not doing much. We were just like something
else to do, yeah, and we were just drinking, like
making banana bread and shit. And then happened. I was
drinking so much too, Like you not even hearings. Yeah,
and yeah, we got pregnant. So what makes me so sad?
Speaker 2 (09:51):
As when you go, there was something wrong with my
body and it's like a fifty to fifty, you know,
it's a fifty percent sheer, but the woman seems to
take the most guilt. It's like there's something broken about me.
But actually, hang on, there's two of you and the
whole party here.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, that's so true. And I think because it's happening
to your body too, like you kind of forget it
does take a toll on. Like my husband was taking
it really hard, but he has told me since he
tried to like just push it all down because I
was he felt like I was taking it worse. So
he's like, I can't fall apart because I need to
look after her. Yes, So like it af fixed both
(10:27):
of you, Like so yeah in different ways. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
And then so that was okay during lockdown, crazy wild
times you were still working in radio when you did
finally feel pregnant. How did that feel in terms of
like that whole expiration of your career. Did you kind
of like put that to the side, it didn't matter
(10:54):
too much, or you.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Know, we're like what am I gonna do? Ah, well,
I don't. I'd had a long lead in years, and
at the time I was like a bit younger, and
I was like, yeah, progressive women, we're gonna do this.
We're gonna do everything. I can do it all and
you can.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
But like.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Yeah, so I was like, yeah, I can do this.
I'm just gonna take three months off. And I did
do all of those things. But like in my mind
first child, I was like, we're gonna kill this. We're
gonna like, we'll have it all unlocked. The baby's going
to sleep, and you know, all of that kind of stuff.
And again, life kicks in and it kicks your ass
(11:37):
and gives you a reality check. So I wasn't too
worried about it. I was like, three months off, it'll
be sweet. Is it what you took three months off?
Speaker 2 (11:48):
And did you make that decision kind of early on
in the pregnancy.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
Yeah, because you know, like you're in a position where
you can't you can't just take a year off and
then expect to come back. Yeah, you know, and our
kind of job, it's outward facing, you know, like you
need to be there. Yes, So that was playing a
lot in my mind. A lot. So you went back
three months later, Yeah, and I was I was.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Breastfeeding, So I feel like it's still so tender three
months later. Like I had the luxury of not being
in a full time job at the time. I was
kind of I sort of caught radio for that point
in my life, and I just was kind of on
my own sort of clock doing social media jobs and
(12:35):
stuff like that.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
So I didn't which I loved Jason.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
I think he doesn't, but I, you know, I didn't
have that preciure to go back, and I just think
how tender I was three months you know, postparder.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
Do you look back now going that was? That was
pretty hard? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:55):
I do.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
But I did it again with my second child, so
like because I went back, and like, I don't want
it to be a whole with me because it was
a soon I made. But it was so I would
get up at three am because I was still breastfeeding.
It was like one feed during the night, and then
I'd get up at three am and I'd pump, and
then I'd go to work do the show. I tried to.
(13:21):
I tried to pump at work, but it's very hard
when you're doing stuff can't do it and someone.
Speaker 3 (13:26):
Excuse, oh god, I don't miss a noise, and.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
So yeah, then I'd have to like race home and
like feed and yeah, and then you have to instantly
and you get home, like switch into like mum mode
and you know, get the heels off, take your makeup off,
get into some you know. So in theory again, I
thought it would be great, but then when I did it,
I was like, shit, this is just like it's hard.
Like with Bastie, I was just my first my son,
(13:57):
my first one. I was just like vital flight. I
was just flailing. It was just and I hated breastfeeding him,
hated it.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
And well maybe that's I mean, look, I look at
you now with toe and I'm just saying, how do
you do it? Because I've I've got Charlie who's toddler,
and I just came back into work this year, and
I just thinks, how is she doing not just one,
but two?
Speaker 1 (14:22):
And now I'm obviously about to embark on that journey.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
But do you think that motherhood, You know, over time,
it does start to feel a little bit more natural
and you start to relax a little bit where you
were pretty uptight the first time around.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
That's the one thing I was going to tell you
is that the first time around is so scary because
you're like, oh my god, everything is new. You're doing
everything for the first time. So you're giving birth for
the first time, you're breastfeeding for the first time, or
feeding them however, and everything is like oh my god,
and I don't just keep them alive. Second time, you're like, oh,
(14:56):
I've done this before. Ah yeah, I got this. Like
especially you've got like, you know, a two year age gap.
It will come back to you and you'll just be like, oh,
it's all good and you're exactly right. Like the first
time around, I was so up tired about everything this time.
Maybe that's why I is like a little bit like
stroppy and can hold her own because she's just kind
of been left to figure it out a little bit.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yeah, I'm like, should be right, mate, should be right. Well.
I think a lot of people say about this second.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
One of my big fears, I mean, going into having
Charlie the first time and now going into a second
is the impact.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
On the relationship.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
And you know, when you're in the trenches, it's he's tough,
and when you're tired in this sleep deprivation? Do you
have any advice on that?
Speaker 1 (15:44):
Les? How were you? I don't know how personal you
want to get here, but it's like, how are you, guys?
How are you after Charlie?
Speaker 2 (15:54):
I mean, look, there were definitely tough times, but BJ
is a very hands on dad. I'm very the air
and yeah, and I think that really helps. And I
think I mean, look, I feel like lots of times
when you've got the sleep deprivation and you're really in
the trenches, it's pretty hard to assess.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
That time, like it's almost a bit of a write off.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
But once you come through, I just think it's really
important to communicate and just get on the same level
and like, and it takes a while to come back
to feeling human. And I think once you boys start
to feel a bit human again, then you can kind
of properly converse.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
But for a while, it's like so alien and I
know we're going to.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Go through that again because some people I've had some
comments to me, like I love a people who think
it's hard with one, Oh my god, Like it's just
about to you know, really kick off.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
It's not always something you just you just like ban
cut the sleep now, Like, yeah, you'll be fine. Honestly,
I think a lot of people say one is fine,
two is a million or whatever it is. But there's
two of you, there's two kids, like and it always
you know, it feels tough when they're a newborn and
(17:18):
they need you all the time. But like, now that
I'm out the other side of that, you can see
how fast it goes. It Like, I still feels like
a baby to me. She's just turned two, So like,
it goes so fast. You'll feel every single day, but
the year will fly by, you know. And then suddenly
as soon as they walk and stuff like, you can
(17:38):
like leave them to play with each other. And that's
the most incredible thing. They actually spend a lot of
time entertaining each other and I only have to jump
in when there's a fight and one is threatened. Yeah,
So like, honestly, until your bebt walks, you know that's
you're gonna be very hands on. But that can go,
like can some people walking at nights? They could go
(18:00):
in a year And then suddenly you know, you got
a little human and she I'm convinced it's a sheep.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
I'm convinced it's a sheet, but I don't know. Charlie
always goes girl, baby girl, Charlie, is it a baby
boy or girl? And he goes girl, but then sometimes
he'll say boy. Although today he freaked me out and
he goes baby gone and I was like what and
he goes, no, baby girl.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
Oh Jesus, Charlie, how have we never spoken about like
births and stuff.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
I don't know what was yours? Like both both emergency cesareans.
Mine was an emergency Caesar two. Yeah, welcome to the club.
But were you upset about it? Had you asked me
a week before, I would have thought I would have
been so gutted.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Uh. You know. I went in doing hypno birth thing
and I was like, this is going to be as
natural as possible.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
And I remember the night before going into labor Beja.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
I was like, hey, what happens if things work out?
Speaker 2 (19:00):
And I'm like, that's how you manifest bad things, and
like I went off and that was obviously the hall
bones because I was about to go into labor and
he was like, no, we just need a plan bing
and I was like, anyway, next day, go on to
labor at about seven o'clock at night and then Mom
(19:23):
came out, BJ went to sleep for a bit. Mom
and I were chilling in the bath, so I was
just trying to get comfortable. We left time at about
one am. I remember seeing two beautiful deer as we're
driving down. The driver I was like, oh my god,
it was like this really beautiful. Okay, this is this
is it. It was like a weird I don't know,
(19:44):
a good omen, I guess yeah yeah, and the omen
yeah fuck. That drive was horrendous, so bad. Why do
they not let you get on like all fours.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
And the car? That was all I wanted to do,
like harming over no farming.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
For one split second, we get to the hospital and
I thought, how many was I?
Speaker 1 (20:10):
How many? What's that? Oh my god? What I was dilated?
Is dilated? Yeah? Yeah, just all the terminology.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Is coming back. I want to say I was three
or four cinematas dilated.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Okay, and then quite halfway, no, I was it more
like it was it felt like a decent amount. And
and then it was like I was laboring quite quickly,
and it was like my midwife was like, all right,
it feels like we're almost on here. Then basically Charlie
got stuck posterior, horrendous, horrendous noises and sewed.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
But I look back with the roasters to glasses, I'm like,
let's do it again.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Again.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
But once it happened, you know, absolutely absolutely no regret
or shame or anything. I was just stoked. He was
alive and safe and well and that was all that mattered.
And I was like, what, I yes so much?
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Do you know what I mean? Yeah? Do you know?
And both times, like I tried so hard. I really
wanted to, like I don't know why. I don't know why,
befot's pressure myselfs And also it sounds horrendous. Anyone who's
had a bagetal birth, it sounds like painful.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
There are there are I think there are some really
blessed ones that I don't know, Like have you've seen
those YouTube? But it's like painfree and it's totally and
I wanted to do that.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
It's so not like me. But I wanted to do
the natural birth and I was going to breathe my
way through it. And then I was like amy joy
and then emergencies AIRI and I just cried and I
was like I don't want to and then we're like
everyone's going, well, the baby needs to just come out
in the safest way, and I was like fine, So
we did it. But the first time around it was
quite brutal because I needed to have a spinal tap
(21:52):
in the end because my epidural wore off, so I
couldn't feel anything from my nick down and I was
just like completely numb. But then I started to I
had to have pithadone. I don't even remember why, and
then I started shaking, and so I was pretty much
kind of out of it when my son was born.
(22:14):
So Andrew, my husband, filmed a video. I don't remember it,
but I was awake, but I'm so grateful that he
filmed when basically got put on me. Yeah, the only
thing I remember not seeing him, but I remember thinking,
get him off me because I'm gonna drop him because
I couldn't feel anything, and obviously they were holding him,
(22:34):
but my first thought was get him off me. He's
gonna fall on the floor. And that's all I remember.
So I'm so thankful that he's got a video of it,
because I actually spoke to him and I was like,
you know, I was like my baby, But I don't
remember any of that. Yeah, so it was like, really,
it was a really tough first outing. Did you when
(22:58):
you were pregnant first time? And now that you know
you're pregod second time? Have you googled more or less? Less?
Wildly less?
Speaker 2 (23:09):
And oh my god, I wish you could the voice
notes that I sent to my midwife the first time round.
Speaker 1 (23:15):
Yeah, You're like, is this normal? Is everything? Is this normal?
It's normal when coms a pleading, when I brush my teeth?
Am I dying? I've just haaid a kebab and I'm
worried that maybe do you think the kebab meat might
be a little bit funny?
Speaker 2 (23:29):
She's so like Rea suing every time I actually see
her my voice first voice message in a long time
this morning, just saying, oh wait, what did I say.
Speaker 1 (23:40):
Today? It is your resident, It's Teresa. I'm just be
strong because.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
I feel like I've even felt lots of kicks consistently.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
I feel like sometimes I do feel a lot of flutters,
and then I'm like, oh my god, should be feeling more?
Should I be showing more? I feel like I'm fed,
Like my belly is beat at this time, and it's
soft and not such.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
An obvious one, but I'm definitely bigger, and I'm sure
it is.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
It just doesn't feel very consistent in it.
Speaker 2 (24:06):
Sometimes I like, I don't know, is it almost been
coming to like chicken heartpet or do you think I
know something had happened?
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Next page?
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Also, the headaches have been awful this time around.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
Yes, So anyway, she's freaking amazing. She sent me back
in an amazing.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Reassuring voice message, saying, look, we don't even start monitoring
the kicks from like twenty five weeks.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
I don't need to be consistent because.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
I just felt like little flutters and bubbles and all
that kind of stuff. But I just can't remember last
like when I felt stuff last time.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
I think it's about around twenty weeks. You get kind
of consistent, Yeah, feelings did you feel in the second time?
The baby? Just like everything is softer. I just feel
like I did not look cute. I did not look
cute with my bombs. You think that, but you you do,
and like, just do I will I look back even
(25:01):
if you never put them anywhere. Just take photos of
yourself because I've got like a handful because I was
such a baby about it. Like, just take photos of yourself.
Just for your own thing, you know, but you're right,
Like the bump shows earlier. It's because your muscles and
everything are like they know what they're doing. They're right again,
everyone shows a bit earlier. Sometimes it's a bit lower,
(25:24):
like you know, you might find that something's I feel
like the shape of my stomach has changed, yes, like forever,
Like there's certain parts of you that might change forever.
Like my boobs are a bit saggier.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
So saggy, and I don't know how I'm gonna do
like they are like so si and like now they've
got like all koshy again.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
They've all got coshy again.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
And nice because I'm pregnant, but you wait till boast breastfeeding.
But it's just part of it, and it's part of
it and we have to, you know, embrace it because
what our body has actually created.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Is something that you wouldn't trade anything in the world. Yeah. Yeah,
you're amazing.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Oh I was going to talk about actually body confidence
just yeah, because it feels so trivial to be insecure
during a time where you're creating a human But it's
something I really struggle with continuing to be able to
be positive about. Yeah, and it feels so much trivial
(26:28):
when so many people have so many issues actually falling
pregnant in the first place. You hear, am I worried
about how my fucking leags look. It's just so stupid,
but I can't knock it out my head.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Yeah, but it's all relative to you, right, Like, how
do you okay? So, say you needed to go to
like some radio function and you need to get dressed up,
how initially, how are you feeling right now?
Speaker 2 (26:50):
I just don't have to dress myself because I feel
like I'm in the between bays, Like I don't look
good in the maternity gear, I don't look.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Good in normal gear, so I try the beggy stuff.
But I'm so sure and I just look stupid, like
I'm we're in a bag, you know.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
I think it's just that in between phase particularly, and
like because I've been keeping it on the d LO,
I haven't really fully been able to embrace the bump.
And it's just that kind of like your identity is
challenged quite a lot along the way. I think when
you're so fixated on how you were and you just
have to know that you just keep changing. But I
(27:25):
think this time I have the reassurance of I got
through it last time. I remember feeling like this last time,
but I remember coming out the other side and actually
running a half marathon, not straight a back like a.
Speaker 1 (27:37):
Couple of years ago.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
You know, your body does bounce back in time, however
that looks for you, and it's just taking it pressure off.
But it still doesn't mean that you have those body
image struggles along the way.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
Yeah, but you also don't like I don't like saying
bounce back. Hate doesn't need to know you body. You
never lost your body. It doesn't have to come back,
and it's probably not going to be the same. It
can be different, but it can still be strong and
it can still be And like I'm saying this to
you as someone who went through exactly what you're going
(28:15):
through and like didn't want photos taken of me and
was just like constantly feeling like you're a lump and
you know, like everything it's not only what you can see,
and it's not just like weight and stuff. It's the
fact that you're tired. It's the fact that your feet hurt,
it's the fact that your guns are bleeding, it's you know,
like it's all of the extra boobs and tenre yeah yeah,
(28:36):
and that so you're spelling and everything makes you feel sick,
and it's all of it all makes you feel gross.
It totally does. And I do find that there'll be
days where I am feeling better and I'm like, hang on,
why was I so harsh for myself yesterday?
Speaker 2 (28:50):
And even if I just do like a light work hard,
you know, I'm not like going hard out or whatever.
But when I do feel good in those moments, I'll
try and like member body more and I will find
that that does.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
Give me that boost of confident. And it's such a
mental mental thing, like the more you move, the more
you feel like you're actually nuturing your body. Then you
do you do wrap the benefits from it, but you
just need to slow it down.
Speaker 2 (29:17):
Well, actually, I well, this is where we get into
the podcast where we talk about the practices that you
like to do that you know will keep you saying,
because you're incredibly busy, you're working, you've got two little kids,
how does me again making beautiful puppaus stay sane in
the chaos?
Speaker 1 (29:38):
I mean the chaos. I remember going to my therapist
and I'm always like trying to get him to fix
my realities. And he's kind of just like you've got
to get comfortable in the chaos, like just breathe and
be like let it all flow around you. And like
that's so true with two kids. I'm trying to control
these little people who don't want to be controlled, and
(30:01):
so I'm trying, I said, so everyday thing, I'm trying
to just breathe and be like does this matter in
this moment? Does this matter? You're like fighting trying to
get shoes on because you've got to get out the door.
And I'm like, she's going in the car with barefeeta,
take the shoes, and like, does this matter if she's
not wearing what I wanted to wear, she's wearing a
(30:21):
hive's vest with her tutu and gum boots. Does it matter?
Notice that I always say she Okay, we found the
rebel in the duo, but like, honestly, just like be
comfortable in the manness. Because we used to always say
me and Andrew that we just need to get through this,
(30:43):
if we just get through this week, because every week
was busy, but then it never changed, like you just
constantly got stuff happening. So we tried to stop doing
that and just be like we're just comfortable. We just
need to breathe. Nothing is heart surgery in our life,
like we might be doing a podcast or you know,
(31:03):
like it's just yarning. Nothing is that important. We're not
saving lives for your sanity, you know. Yeah. And like
even because I had reflux, so she cried a lot
as a baby, and it would just you know, like
a crying baby is just so hard on your mental health.
(31:23):
And so for a long time, every time she would cry,
I'd just be really triggered and I'd kind of melt down.
And Andrew's like, she is okay, she's crying because she's
having a meltdown. She's safe, she's feared, she's got to clean,
like there's nothing wrong with her. Just like breathe and
take take a moment. Like I used to go away
(31:44):
and take a moment for myself even when she was crying,
Like she'd be in her cot and I'd go away
and I'd be like I need a moment for myself
just to like breathe and be like, Okay, go back
in there.
Speaker 2 (31:57):
She is safe, she is well feed, she's okay, she's crying. Yeah,
but you actually have to tend to yourself in those
moments or else, Yes.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
You're just praying from me, you can't cry, or you're
gonna you know, you're just gonna yell, or I don't know,
you're just gonna. It's not gonna be good for her
or good for you. So I just go away and
I go what matters in this moment? What matters in
this moment?
Speaker 2 (32:21):
Yeah, packing your battles, I'm learning now two year old,
that is very important.
Speaker 1 (32:26):
Who cares if he goes to be with an onion?
Is it hurting anyone?
Speaker 3 (32:28):
No?
Speaker 1 (32:31):
Oh my god?
Speaker 3 (32:32):
Why did they take weird shit?
Speaker 1 (32:34):
To be honestly? Now he has to take a dog
to the beard.
Speaker 2 (32:37):
So I'm like, okay, come on figgie, like it's my
only way of getting him to bed? Or does he
bring in the wheelbarrow? Does he bring in like freaking digger, whatever, it'll.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Get him to bed? And I'm like, am I just
being a push over mum? Probably? Nah? Like they just
attached to things like I has to go to sleep
with one of those Mowana Disney cards every night at
the moment, and then last night I took it off
her because I was like, well, I don't want to
stick to her mouth or something, so like took it
out once she'd gone to sleep, and then in the
middle of the night she wakes up and she's like, ah,
(33:08):
I was like, oh God, she can't find the card.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Like why can't they just like a cute little snugly
or she's got four bunnies in there with her cut
on one of him. Wake it's going to be hard
and random the object. But oh, it's so true. Like
I think we're all really guilty of the site going oh,
it'll be better win dot dot and it's just such a.
Speaker 1 (33:31):
Messious cycles get through this. Yeah, yeah, it will be.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
And maybe she's just gotta be like it's perfect now,
even though Bill's chaotic, it's actually perfect right now in
this moment, And I'm not going to have any other
moment like this, and I just have a freaking suck
it up because we will look back on these days
and we were just wish that we were more present.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Yeah, And like I always think of like me when
I was younger, and I like even just when we
were trying to get pregnant, how desperate we were for
a baby. We were just we were just like we
just like one will be enough if we can never
do it again. And we were just desperate and now
we've got him. And like also when we were like
(34:11):
doing broadcasting school and stuff, we were like, we're just
desperate to have this radio gig. And you get these
things and then you're like right next and you're don't
freaking appreciate it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. And like when
I stopped doing breakfast radio, like in the moment, you're like,
I'm so tired, it's so busy all this, and then
I stopped doing it for two years, and now that
I'm back here, I'm like, God, you need to appreciate this.
(34:34):
You need to stop breathe who cares about the early
mornings because you know you love it, Like, just appreciate everything.
And yeah, have you felt that since coming back?
Speaker 2 (34:48):
Now you've got your two babies, you care less about
the shit that you.
Speaker 1 (34:52):
Used to worry about pre babies.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
In terms of comparing yourself to other people in the industry.
Speaker 1 (35:01):
You want me to say, no, no, no, it's not.
Speaker 2 (35:04):
I want you to be honest, because I still do
and like, no, I thought that when you have babies
you stop caring about that shit. And yes, I think
you do stop caring about a lot of superfluous stuff
that you used to.
Speaker 1 (35:14):
See over Yeah, man, we still our brains still get
the bigger of us.
Speaker 2 (35:19):
Like I look back and I feel like I was
so much more successful in some ways a few years ago,
and I look at myself now and you're like, oh
my god, I.
Speaker 1 (35:31):
Have I gone backwards?
Speaker 2 (35:32):
But no, because when I was in that position, all
I wanted was what I've got right now. And it's
back to that not appreciating what you've got.
Speaker 1 (35:40):
Oh yeah, I couldn't everything you just said. Everything you
just said, because I obviously like left a show, and
I went through a whole period where I was like
do I want to put this on a podcast? When
I and I don't cry. I had a moment where
(36:02):
I was like do I regret this? And like I
had to fight to not regret having my child, and
I was like, have I ruined one thing and search
for another? And that's like, God, that's a lot, but
(36:23):
that's something that like women, I'm sure a lot of
women like think. And then now saying it out loud,
I feel so much shame because of course I don't
regret I know either, my babies are the best thing
and the best thing that's ever happened.
Speaker 2 (36:37):
And you'd never ever trade them in for the world.
But when your ego comes in from a career perspective
and progress, and if you're looking at how the world
perceives you looking inside you know, then you can't help
but compare yourself.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
But only you.
Speaker 2 (36:53):
Know what truly matters to you, like truly truly matters
to you. But I think because the so much validation
needed online and there's so much people proving how successful
they are all the time, you can't help but feel
dragged into that game.
Speaker 1 (37:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:13):
Yeah, when you know truly what brings you the most
joy is your family and your beautiful children. But when
you're feeling weaker, when you're feeling those days of insecurity,
you start having these Christians and you feel guilty a
one hundred percent of what you mean. But there's no
shame in that, because I think a lot of women
would have exactly the same moment.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
Yeah, and it is hard when you find so you've got.
I always think when your personal life is thriving, sometimes
your professional life is not, and vice versa. Like when
I was probably doing the best professionally I was like
having a meltdown. I was like having struggles with my relationship.
(37:57):
I'm like having fertility issues, Like I'm struggling to even
get out of bid to go and have laughs on
the radio. But I'm having the you know, prime of
my professional career and vice versa. You know, so you can't.
Speaker 2 (38:12):
I always come back to this quote, you can have
it all, but just not at the same time.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
Yeah, and you need to be happy with We don't
need to be happy, but you should try and find
the joy and everything you've got at each moment because
there is joy in each face one hundred and we
just have to do what we can to not look
no answer to that because I don't preach that kind
(38:39):
of stuff on that. Don't listen to that, but appreciate
what we've got in front of you. But still the
brain goes and I think, I think it is doing
things yet encourage your own self esteem and make you
feel better in yourself. So whether it is going to
your little pilates class, or whether it's surrounding for the
(39:00):
right people or doing you know, like positive informations which
to some people might send corny, but whatever it is
that you can do to come back to you're really
your strong place, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Where you are feeling confident in yourself and that looks
different for everyone.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
Yeah, I do. Like this is so corny, but like
I've started trying to because I've forever been the person
that would like look in the mirror, specially when you're
naked and be like ugh, saggy burt, or like say
horrible things to myself. But I remember saying to our
mutual friend Caitlin, I was like, don't talk to yourself
like that. Don't talk to my friend like that. And
(39:40):
I was like, I would never let anyone talk to
you like that. So I'm not gonna let you talk
to yourself like that. But then I'm guilty of doing
it to myself.
Speaker 2 (39:47):
I know you'll let your you won't get your friends,
but your best friend who should be you'll best friend you,
and you'll you'll say.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
The nastiest things to them. So stop being so nice.
I've tried to now, like before I have a shower,
be like, yeah, you're like doing well, you look like
your arms look strong at the moment, or like you know,
like yep, try and be kind to myself. This skin
looks clear or you know, because I'm also very conscious
(40:15):
of the impact I'm giving to both of my kids.
So we try and do like positive. We're very mirror positive. Yeah,
we try and like dancing from the mirror or be like,
you know, look cruel, you look cute, you look so cool,
look at your dance moves. Like everything is positive when
we look in the mirror, even if like I look
at it, I'm like, oh, insert nasti comment here about myself.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
You can turn it around us and you can do it,
and you actually can turn around you're thinking like you
if you do repeat these things over and over, you
do start to believe it, whether it's negative or whether
it's positive. I always love the I don't know. I
use this mancher the other day and it was like,
what if everything just works out? Like instead of going
into the day feeling like everything's just kind of shit,
what if everything just what if everything worked up for you?
Speaker 1 (41:02):
What if today? What if I don't make it in time?
What if I can't do this? If it like why catastrophizing?
That's quite cool? Yeah, what if everything just works out?
Like what if everything is actually just working in your favor? Okay,
I'm going to wrap this up with a bit of
advice that you give to your younger self going into
the Korea that.
Speaker 2 (41:20):
You were going into early twenties, What would you say
to young Megan, beautiful Pappas, don't let.
Speaker 1 (41:31):
Anyone dim your light, Don't let anyone tell you you're not
good enough, Like try and keep who you are always
in every moment. That is the most important thing. Like
just shine bright, speak loud, don't try and like make
yourself smaller for anything or anyone. This is what I
(41:52):
tell myself. And don't try not to care about what
you look like, because you look fucking great about it.
It's gonna stag and drop and expand, so enjoy it. Oh, Megan,
thank you so much for coming on today. I really
appreciate it for having me. Congratulations. I don't felt like
(42:16):
we didn't delve into your pregnancy enough. Well, I'm gonna
probably go into it too much over. I'm so excited
for you, and I know it's gonna be a girl.
I reckon, it's gonna be your power. But you're I
love you equally. Well.
Speaker 2 (42:35):
That was my episode with Megan Papas and I loved
Jenny with mes I feel like we could have gone
on for a very, very long time.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
Some powerful takeaways.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
That I got from the episode were basically choosing your battles,
is this worth worth actually stressing out and stepping back
at tacking of breath and just surrendering to the chaos
that is around you, but also pushing aside that mentality
of everything will be better when dot dot dot. We're
(43:06):
both obviously so guilty of just taking off things in
life like we Okay, you get this job, great, You've
wanted that for so long.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
What's next? You know? And I think in life we
are so programmed to do that, Okay, cool, I've done this.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
Now what instead of actually sitting there and enjoying the view,
sucking it all, sucking it all in, but you know,
really lapping it up and appreciating how far we've come.
But instead we're like Noah, next, next, next, next, next,
And then hearing Megan's raw honesty on what I'd say
(43:43):
a lot of women do feel when they I mean,
if you look at it on paper, your career takes
a backstep for a while when you go into that
role of being a mother, and you can't help but
have these feelings of what if you know, what if
I didn't do this, It doesn't mean that you love
your children any Yes, but it's the ego coming in
and trying to take over your mind. And it's just
(44:05):
been strong enough to know that you actually wanted this
the whole time, and it is the reality of making
that decision. There has to be a sacrifice that comes
with it. And I will always come back to the
saying you can have everything, that you just can't have
everything at once. And perhaps maybe this is taking you
(44:25):
on a greater path that you can't see right now.
This is like a diversion and all will make sense
down the track.
Speaker 1 (44:32):
Right now, it feels like you're behind.
Speaker 2 (44:34):
But once you step back and get to look at
the greater picture, then you'll be like, oh, no, I
did make the right choice, and you have to stand
firm with what feels right inside. That's my little it's
my little pep talk that I'm going to leave you
with if you've felt like you've been in a similar situation.
But I'm really really grateful for Megan coming on this week.
I'd love to know what you got out of this
(44:56):
week's special episode. I was slow it down. You can
always get in touch with me on Instagram at pj DJ,
and I'll be back next Sunday with another episode.
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