October 19, 2024 • 31 mins
Joining me this week to Slow It Down is Matilda Green. Matilda and her husband Art also made the move out of the big smoke and in this ep we talk about how they are still learning to slow life down and enjoy the small moments.
I love how Matilda consciously takes time out to have fun with her kids when she's feeling overwhelmed and doesn't take herself too seriously. She also shares how the small acts in community can really make you feel connected, as well as some amazing advice for her younger self.
I hope you enjoy the episode and don't forget you can follow along on Instagram where I have an epic Slow It Down giveaway 😉
About the show:Â
Life is fast. Information is overwhelming. We seem busier and more anxious than ever. Introducing ‘Slow It Down’. A time to chill, wind down and join a space that inspires people to live authentically and slow it down. A hub for living more consciously and incorporating mindful practices and rituals in an achievable way. The aim is to showcase guests who have chosen to live a more balanced lifestyle mixed in with experts who offer tangible tips and tricks to feel a little more zen.Â
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Heads Podcast Network.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Hello and welcome to Slow It Down. I'm your host,
PJ Harding, and I want this to be a place
where you can come hang out on the weekend, relax,
reflect and tap into ways of getting through tough times.
There's so much noise in the world. We have more
information than ever and we're all so overstimulated. I want
to strip it back, get to the core of what
it means to be a human will discovering beautiful and
(00:30):
simple ways to stay sane in the chaos. No judgment,
just a safe and inspiring space where hopefully you can
catch up with your week's laundry. This week on the show,
I am joined by someone that a lot of New
Zealanders will be well familiar with, Matilda Green. She obviously
came onto the scene in twenty fifteen when she entered
(00:50):
the first season of New Zealand's The Bachelor, and she
was one of the lucky ones. She ended up actually
finding love and going on to marrying Art. The two
have now got three beautiful children, living semi rurally outside
of the big smoke of Auckland and Warkworth. And I've
always really looked up to Matilda. I think she is
(01:11):
a beautiful role model. She's always been really open about
prioritizing health and I wanted to tap into her brain
this week because obviously there's a lot going on. She's
got three kids, she's working, she's got a podcast, and
I just wanted to know her survival tips and tricks
and how you can thrive in the season that she's
(01:31):
currently in. I hope you enjoy the chat. Matilda Green
is joining me for Sloight Down. How are you doing?
Speaker 1 (01:41):
I'm so good. I'm sitting here in my lounge. It's
like a grade rizzly day and got my baby Penny
beside me, who is just going to be passed over
to act. But I feel very calm and just so
excited for this.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
Is calm like a common state of mind for you,
as a mum of three, podcaster and all around probably
quite busy woman.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
I think I work really hard to bring the calm,
if you know what I mean. Like, if I didn't
put that work in to bring the calm, then it
would be chaos. So I know that that's a really
big priority for me, is to set aside time for
meditation and different bits and bobs, just so I can
be in a calm space when things are going to shit?
(02:29):
Can I say shit?
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Absolutely? You can say all of the shits and all
of the pities, you know.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
When things are really going crazy. Then I know that
I am not going to get dragged into it emotionally,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
Okay, so we'll get more into like the rituals and
things you like to do, son, but paint us the
picture of your general weake like your week days, in
your weekend. How does that kind of look at the moment.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
So it's very fluid. I was telling a friend about
this recently, actually, about how so many of mine and
arts conversations are around logistics.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Oh my god, can we just shut up so sexy?
I know, with your logistics?
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Oh yeah, like what are you doing Monday afternoon? Because
I'm going to be out and who's gonna look after pennies?
So it's just very much who's doing what, what's your
week looking like? What's my week looking like? And who's
picking up dropping off? That sort of thing. But in
a general week, So I do like pick up and
drop off for the older two preschool four days a week,
(03:34):
and then Penny's home with me, and then all kids
are home on a Wednesday. So can you hear about
crushing in the background? So about that?
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Ant's just hey, look, we're thriving in the chaos. This
is what it's all about. What's he doing?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
He is in the kitchen ap currently.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Oh my god, how stress red nose.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
It's actually this is okay because it's it's a cosmetic
reg ok so there's no like removing of big parts
of the house or anything. So it's okay. But yeah,
poor Art, he's he's he's said it bit on with
trying to get this done with three kids around. Yea, yeah,
And so that's that's sort of how it looks. And
on the weekend we prioritize family time and we're going
(04:17):
to a lot of birthday parties. That's pretty common. Yeah,
I'm just doing fun stuff. We'd like, go for cool hikes,
go to the beach, do lots of different things. I
go to the library during the week with Penny, we
do wriggle and rhyme. You know, that's really what we're
doing on a weekly base.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
Are you quite rigid with routine or are you do
you kind of like organized chaos or do you roll
the flow? What sort of works best? For you.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
I always thought that I would be a go with
the flow hype of mum, because that's how I am
usually as a person. I don't do a lot of planning.
But I've found it's really hard to thrive in chaos,
and it makes my life so much easier when I
have some sort of structure. So I try and plan
it out on a Sunday how the week's going to look,
and loosely what we're gonna do, And oh my god,
(05:08):
it makes such a big difference when I can plan
out meals. I know what the plan is for the week,
and but but I don't. I think I've learned after
having three kids now that you can't be too rigid
in your plans.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Because anything could happen constantly.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Someone's got a fever, or someone's just like I don't
want to do that. So you know, there's there's a
bit of movement in the in the in the routine.
But yeah, it helps me a lot to have structure.
It makes me feel like I'm somewhat in control.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
I am exactly the same way. I always thought I
was a happy, go lucky, spontaneous person who didn't need
no routine, And like now, I'm working with the toddler,
and I actually I need it. My brain just I
can't contain my brain otherwise and there's just constant noise
and chaos, and I just I've realized I have to
(06:00):
and the meals ahead. Like I never thought i'd be
a whelproper, you know, I have to have that Sunday.
The Sunday I need dedicated to feeling like I'm getting
on top of shirt.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
It's key, it's yeah, And how are you finding me
back on the tools?
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Yeah, it's initially a real emotional juggle, but I feel
like the more you do it, the more it just
feels like normal. But God, you feel so out of
sorts at the beginning, especially when like these briastfeeding in
the max or whatever. Your brain's just not there. But
I think the more time you spend at work kind
(06:35):
of doing your thing, it kind of just becomes more normal.
But it was definitely a real awkward dance at the beginning,
and that guilt because my mom is looking after Charlie,
who's nearly two, like all the time, which which is
a lot, you know, even though she's like, I love
it and hurt. My grandmother did that for me it's
really special, really special, but it's probably not sustainable long term.
(06:59):
We're going to have to give a danger. But no,
it is really nice. But but yeah, the mum girl
and all that definitely look loves to cray on every
now and then. But I want to talk about your
rattuels that you were talking about, that are sort of
your non negotiables that you know, when that chaos does come,
those waves decide to roll on in. You know that
(07:21):
it's going to help you at big time. So what
how does that look for you?
Speaker 1 (07:26):
My meditation practice is really important to me. So I
learned vade meditation through Georgi of Ebbsat and honestly, I'm
just so grateful that I did that. So I did
that I think four years ago when I was how
Milo must have been around one. So yeah, my oldest
(07:46):
Milo was around one and and I got the practice.
And it's been really difficult to bring it into a
daily routine, really hard. There's no sugarcoating it. It's when
people are like, oh, just you know, make sure you
do it, set aside the time, first thing in the morning.
It is hard for kids and some days I just
(08:07):
don't get to it. But I really feel a difference.
I just find that, you know, when sometimes you lose
you shit as at much. And hey, some listeners might
be like, I can't really how auld are you? No?
Speaker 2 (08:21):
No, no, the fuse the short fuse is a real thing.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Yeah. But I find that when I'm prioritizing that meditation practice,
I'm like way further away from that breaking point, so
like I can still get there where I'm just like
it's too much, I've lost my shit, but it's it
takes a lot more for me to get there, so
I've got a lot more bandwidth. And so the meditation
practice is the first one, and the second one is
(08:45):
music and dance. I love music, I always have and honestly,
if I can just put on some music and just
vibe out in the kitchen for five to ten minutes,
it makes such a difference. And like prioritizing fun as well,
because sometimes when things are just crazy, kids are getting
(09:06):
on my left, it it's just like all too much.
Like if I can just be like, do you know what,
I'm just going to lean in and we're just going
to be real silly and have a great time and
let's just trash the house and have fun and I'm
going to deal with it later. That's been really like
I know it doesn't sound like much, but that has
been a changer for me to just lean into the fun,
(09:28):
you know, like that that's all kids want to do.
It's their first priority are And I always laugh about
it that, like they get up in the morning and
they're like, what am I going to do today? Have fun?
And that's all they want to do.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
It's beautiful, and we just.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
Try and lean in. Just do it, have fun, be silly, and.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
It's all about how you make them feel. And you know,
looking back, it's not going to be all the things
that you had or all the things you know that
you were focused on. It was actually on how you
made them feel. So if you're bringing fun, I think
that's everything. I always find that there's a playlist. It
was actually my birthday playlist. It's got like lots of
like really like wholesome tricks like the Verve, but a
sweet symphony, you know, just tracked. Honestly, I'll put that
(10:09):
playlist on and it just brings me back to what
really matters. I'll be, you know, having a moment and
then I just put that on and I'm like life
is beautiful. I'm really grateful.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Like how music can do that again, brings you back
to the moment you're like, oh, this doesn't.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Matter no once your go to or do you mix
it up? Ah?
Speaker 1 (10:28):
I really mix it up. My Spotify is all over
the show.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
I am a real.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Classic rock kind of fan. But then just everything, truly everything,
Like if I'm gonna it depends on the mood I'm in,
Like if I'm feeling kind of like melancholy, i might
put on a little bit of like Nasy star.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
Like that, yeah, that sort of thing. And then if
I'm feeling like I want to tackle the day, you
might do like Queen m Michael Jackson. Controversial but you
know that that sort of thing.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
So just to that whole Michael Jackson thing, I feel
like the world's closed over that. The last couple it
was real controversial and now everyone was like, I just
like his music.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
Always, so people are like Boycott like Tacon I mean,
I do like that song. I'm just gonna play it
the once today.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
Oh dear, Now, look looking at your life from the outside,
a lot of people would say you've got a lot
of gifts, you know, like you're very lucky and you've
got a beautiful life. Do you ever fall victim to
the grass's green and mentality? You wish that you know
things are a little bit different, You wish that you
were doing this or that, And because leaks be honest,
(11:48):
Instagram is never like an absolute accurate portrayal of our lives.
Do you, Matilda Green, find that you do full victim
to a bit of rose colored glasses from time to time?
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Yes, one hundred percent. Yes. But I think I've gotten
a lot better now at noticing when I'm feeling like that,
like I can, and usually I can pinpoint it to
something else. So if I'm feeling like I'm comparing myself
to other people, whether they've got i don't know, more
money or a better house or whatever it is, I
(12:25):
can usually think, ah, do you know what? I've been
spending too much time on my phone recently, which is
usually linked to me feeling shitty. Yeap, So it's all
this vicious cycle. When I'm feeling tired and a bit
burnt out and just not quite on my game mentally,
then I spend more time on my phone, and then
(12:46):
I start comparing myself, and then I can I can
usually snap myself out of it pretty quick by just count.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Looks like there's a head popping into the frame. Is
Penny or is it a dog?
Speaker 1 (12:59):
It's a little dog. Okay, cool, that's faster. And yeah,
I truly am so grateful every single day, and I
count my blessings no matter what. I really, I really
don't take anything in my life for granted, and I
just have to remind myself of that whenever I feel
because we all fall victim to it sometimes, I think.
(13:23):
And it depends on the situation you're in, Like sometimes
you could be in a group where you know everyone's
got lots of money or something, or it just depends
and then you start comparing yourself. But really, we're all
so lucky, so so lucky.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
And what does success mean to you? If you were
to answer that in a sentence, how would you define it?
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Success?
Speaker 2 (13:47):
To me?
Speaker 1 (13:48):
I think means living a life that I can be
proud of in front of my kids. So if that
can be an example for them, then that's true success.
That's all it comes down to for me.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
And when are you in your most proud moments? Like
if you could think back to when you had the
most pride. What would it be.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
I think probably after the birth of my son Milo.
I that moment for me was the most incredible moment
of my entire life, after going through such a long
journey of you know, pregnancy and labor and all of that.
And I remember just lying in bed holding him because
(14:36):
I had a home birth, so I got to be
in my own bed, which was so nice, and I
was holding him just thinking like I can do anything.
And I think it was also like the hormones and
the feeling of like he's here, I get to meet him.
This is the person that's been a part of me
for so long, that I've talked to in my belly
and that I feel so bonded to. Now he's he's here,
He's a person I can I can look into his eyes.
(15:01):
And I also felt like go me. You know. I
really did think like I can achieve anything if I
put my mind to it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
And those hormones they really are wild, like wild drugs.
And I think that's so like telling you know, because
it is sort of coming through like a really hard
time and having that and I think like you learn
a lot from life in that moment, right of like,
you know, good things are worth real hard work and
(15:30):
hard times, and it's not just going to be an
easy road. And also like expect the unexpected, don't even
know what's going to freaking happen, and you kind of
just have to roll with the punches. Yeah, is there
a quote or some kind of mantra that you like
to live your life by, whether it's consciously or subconsciously.
(15:52):
Is this something that you kind of revert back to
sometimes when things are getting a bit tough.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
Yeah, I've got two. So one is one is life
begins at the end of your comfort zone, which is
kind of like what you're saying about how nothing worth
having comes easy right there. Discomfort is a good thing
and just being comfortable all the time is not necessarily
healthy or helpful for you. And I try and live
(16:20):
my life that way and think, if this is feeling scary,
then maybe it's worth doing. And the second one is
can't win the more honestly, like that is just that's
saying helps me so much, Like if something goes wrong
or maybe I didn't get an opportunity, if something falls through,
or if you know, I haven't had a great day
(16:44):
on the parenting tools, I just go oh, I can't
win them all, and it really helps me because it
takes the charge out of it as well. And it's just,
oh wow, tomorrow's a new day. It's just it is
what it is. It can't be perfect all the time.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
But you can win the war. You can lose a
few battles, but you can still win the war.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Right, there's still chance, you know, like we can bring
it there tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
It's okay when you look back to you know how
your life in the media kind of started years back
when you're on The Bachelor, Like how old were you?
Speaker 1 (17:13):
I was twenty four? Oh my god, And I cannot
watch that again because I'm like, who is that? Who
is that child on the show?
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Would you do anything different? I mean, look, it worked
out pretty well for you, but would you have done
anything different? Like looking back through your journey of your
entrance into the public arena.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
Oh, so many things, Okay, so many things. I think
I've evolved so much as a person, so it's it's
hard to think, Oh, I wish I'd done that differently
because I kind of was a different person. You know,
we all change as we get older. But I think
for me, I wish i'd been a little bit more
authentically myself because I was such a people pleaser at
(18:05):
that time in my life, especially like extreme, So I
just wish I had had had the courage to say
what I really thought and stood up for myself a
bit more and just had had the guts to have
more of an opinion.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
Big time.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Yeah. Yeah, but I think I just you know, I
was young twenty four and twenty four at the time,
I was like, I'm really mature, and then now that
I'm almost thirty four, like, I don't know, should think
I was mature to be honest.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Yeah, Look, you can't go through life with regrets, but
you can, certainly, I guess, go through and evaluate, but
you got to be you got to be count yourself.
You can reflect, and I think being authentic is probably
one of the hardest things for a lot of people,
Like we're just so especially the world of and right now,
it's just so hard to say something and then you
(19:03):
don't know how it's going to go, and then you're like, well,
there we go. That's gonna alienate me or that's gonna
It's a really interesting space that we're in right now,
where you know, people will have to be so careful
with what they say. And yeah, I hope that people
kind of do find their authenticity. I think that's the
ultimate in life. Really.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Yeah, yeah, I think so too. And we're in this
bizarre time where everyone is expected to have an opinion
on everything, and I think it's actually really unhelpful to
be honest, because no one's one opinion holds more weight
than anyone else's. And it's this weird time, isn't it,
(19:48):
where just because somebody has a social media following, get
expected to like have this public stance on so many
different issues. And it's like, Okay, I got followers from
going on The Bachelor, Like do you want.
Speaker 2 (19:59):
Me to yeah, into the geopolitical as exactly? I know,
I know, and yeah, it's it's not it's not normal.
It's not normal. And also the exposure that we have
to every single thing that goes on in the world,
Like back in villages times when we were like cave
me in, you know, you didn't know half the shit
that was going on. It's just like so much information,
(20:21):
whether it's even about health stuff or whether it's about
political stuff. It's so hard to wag through.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
And like nobody knows what's what's true anymore. Just like
somebody somebody sees something on Instagram with like a in
an authoritative way, You're like, oh, well, you know that
must be that must be true. And then someone else
say something completely different in a confident, abative.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
Way exactly, and then you're like, what just sucking side
do I take? I think the most important thing for
sanity is to just try and step away and like
absorb your world like the most. I think the most
beneficial thing you can do is be a positive impact
on your like immediate community, right, one hundred percent, yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:02):
Because that's that's somewhere where you can make a direct impact,
Like if you are an active part of your community
looking after those around you and and being an example
to your children about how to look after those around
you and and care for people and help others, that
is that's, in my opinion, one of the best things
(21:26):
you can do, because then you're raising those people to
help the people around them, and then it's a you know,
it's a blow on effect of positivity.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Do you have any role models that you looked up
to or that you've even in the last ten years,
someone that you look up to now that you're like man,
they've got it going on.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
So many people. But do you know what, mostly my
family and my neighbors like some honestly, like the people
that are in my community are so generous and giving.
And it's not that they have all of the stuff
(22:06):
to give, and it's just that's that's the community spirit.
And these people are just so kind and so generous.
And I think since moving to a smaller community from
the city, I've learned so much from them about how
important it is to look after those around you and
be active in fostering those relationships around you and in
(22:27):
your community, because it doesn't just happen like you do.
Actually have to make an effort to be a part
of a community to have the community.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
I found that big time moving rurally, Like, the community
spirit is wild. When I lived in the city for
so many years, I know even you my neighbors never
had any assistance striped through hard times. When anything happens,
they all band together and it's just the most beautiful thing.
And I think it is how we're supposed to live
as human beings, especially when there's children in the mix.
(22:54):
Like it does take a village and it takes a
community to actually stay sane, and I think that's why
there's so many issues going on now, like people feel
like they're forced to do it all on their own life.
If we could have been together. This is student like
an inspirational but isn't it true, like we need other
humans to survive.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Yeah, yeah, because social media gives us the illusion of connection,
but it's not connection, not at all. Like if anything,
it's well, I mean, we can just take one lock
at all the mental health stats and see that it's
not working. When we're like, we're we're connected, but we're
actually the less the least connected we've ever been. And
(23:35):
it's really sad. When we had the same situation when
we lived in Auckland, our neighbors like we'd come and
go and we were the same age. We probably should
have made an effort to be friends, but the only
time we ever interacted was when they was when their
dog escaped and I and so it was in the
morning and I was holding my coffee and I was
(23:58):
holding the dog. I was calling them and I didn't
realize but like I was bending down to and get
the dog. And then as I was bending down, I
was pouring coffee on its head.
Speaker 2 (24:07):
And I didn't even fuck and that's when we left
the city.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
Yeah, I was like this, so so then I had
to be like, hey, I've got your dog and also
I'm really sorry I bourn coffee all over.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
How did they go down? Did they talked to you afterwards?
Speaker 1 (24:22):
All? I know? It was just an awkward interaction and
they were like, oh, that's okay. I was like sorry,
I didn't mentor and they were like, yeah, that's okay.
We're going to take the dog now.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
So you won't be moving back to the city anytime.
So so you line up there. So you guys are
like out of the city quite not rural, but like
small town small small town.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
Yes, well, like it's not that small. I don't know
what the population of Walkward, US have you five thousand?
Speaker 2 (24:50):
Yeah, it's Ce's it's tweet on the way tweet Tweet's
not the right word.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
It's i'd say it's medium small town. Yeah, but it's
it's it's growing pretty rapidly, and some of the og
locals are not happy about it.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
They're not they're not in training. You haven't got McDonald's
or the wee house coming in of you at the
warehouse to be here We've got the warehouse and it
goes off, it pops off. It's great for kids.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
I'm saying to actually, like, you know what we need.
We need a kid's boutique, you know, like we need
a kids drop in town where people can go and
get their their kids party supplies.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
You're going to advocate breaking kids boutique.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
From even start. One.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Been so nice chatting with you today. I want to
finish on what advice you would give to your eighteen
year old self. I know we talked about like looking
back at the Bachelor of that if you could talk
to a younger version of yourself, knowing what's ahead, what
would you tell yourself?
Speaker 1 (25:52):
The first thing would be lay off the fake han
for the of God, it's just it's just not okay.
And the main, the main serious one is because I
went through school with most people telling me that I
wasn't an athlete and that I wasn't academic, and so
I had these these beliefs from when I was really
(26:13):
young to when I finished school, thinking, right, I'm not
smart and I'm not good at sports, So what's left
I'm good with people? Okay, so that's a pretty small pool.
So I'll go into sales and like, which was great,
But I really wish that I could tell myself, like,
you are smart and you can achieve whatever you want
to achieve. And I just wish I had had more
(26:36):
voices telling me that through school. And it has made
me realize how important it is not to label your
children as well, because they really take it on board
like oh, you're shy, you're quiet, you're sporty, you're this,
you're smart, you're not good at writing, you're good at this,
because they believe it and they think, oh, okay, well I'm
not good at that, so that's the reality. Yeah, yeah,
(26:59):
yeah exactly. So I really wish I could tell eighteen
year old me that you can achieve it if if
you try, you're not done.
Speaker 2 (27:08):
That's beautiful. Well, I'm so grateful for you popping on
today and having a little chat and having like a
little lens into your life behind the behind the scenes
of Matilda Green.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
Thanks for having me. It was lovely to catch up
and just be a part of this zen moments.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Lovely, mist I should have told you to bring a
cup of tea or something. I've actually got my oil
b Do you like that?
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Yeah? To the side, Oh that's nice. I've just got
a dog and a lot of mess, so I won't
show you the backdrop.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
Hey, that's what it's all about, the realness of being human. Matilda,
thank you so much. I really really appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
Thanks Pja.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Listening back to that chat, I really wish I had
dived into a few more questions with Matilda, but I
ended up cutting it short, and I've still got more
I want to talk to her about. But there were
a few things that really did stick out to me
this week, and I loved that. You know, when she
is feeling overwhelmed or she's about to lose a shit,
she'll reset with a dance in the kitchen, with like
(28:16):
a little you know, a little dance party. It's that simple.
Just turning on music really loudly, and it doesn't matter, Like,
don't care if it's a cool song or not. Just
blast it loudly and it does reset the mode. I
found it so so effective when my toldles melting darden
or having a tantrum, or just the day it feels
really hard. As I said, I put on that birth
(28:39):
playlist and it just brings me back to what really
matters in life. I also love how she made it
clear of what her non negotible is.
Speaker 1 (28:46):
Now.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
I'm sure there's lots of things that she does also
incorporate into a routine, but the meditation, and I know
that's also really kind of off putting for a lot
of people. They think, shit, I can't sit that still
for that amount of time. I learned vadic meditation. Gosh,
when was it? When I was in Melbourne on breakfast
radio and I was sleep deprived, and I just remember
(29:10):
how incredible it was. They say it's like equivalent to
a few hours sleep or something like that. Who do
it properly? You set yourself out to do it twice
a day, twenty minutes each time. Now as your parent,
there can differ, but I think trying to stick to
doing that as much as possible. It does. There's so
much research and science behind it. It really is a
(29:33):
magical tool. So I love that she has put that
as one of her Nona Gosh balls. I was really
related with her move to walk with in that small
community and the impact that that's had on her life
and seeing firsthand the simple acts of community and how
they really make a difference, And you know that kind
(29:53):
of stuff is so much more important than posting the
latest opinion on the latest thing that's going on in
the news and feeling value from that. I mean, I'm
not saying that that doesn't have a place. It absolutely does,
But I think it can feel really overwhelming when there's
so much going on and you feel like you're not
contributing to the world. One way of getting back to
(30:15):
feeling like you are making some kind of difference as
tepping into your community and seeing your acts firsthand pay off.
So that really sat with me, and I loved her
advice to her younger self. I'm going to kind of
paraphrase it here, but the way I read it was,
don't absorb what others think of you, because look, they
could tell you a green elephant, and if you hear
(30:37):
that enough, you will genuinely believe it. And that's what
we do, right. People will tell you you're not sporty,
you're not good enough, you're not this, you're not that,
and you genuinely believe it if you hear it enough.
So it's finding that strength in yourself to know who
you are. And I don't think that you get that
when you're younger. That happens when you grow up, you
have experiences, and you learn who you are who you
(31:00):
know as the years go by. But it's something we
can all take something from, you know, standing true to
yourself and not believing every negative word that someone has
to say about you. So yeah, I really enjoyed my
catch up with Matilda this week. As I said, I
do wish actually I kind of dived a little bit
deeper and now I'm looking back. We could have gone
(31:22):
on some wild tangents, but look, I hope you've got
something out of it. I'd love to know your thoughts
on this week's episode, and if you've got any suggestions
for other people who'd be a great fit for the podcast,
get in touch with me on Instagram at PJDJ and
I'll be back next week. Have a good one.
The Heads Podcast Network.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Hello and welcome to Slow It Down. I'm your host,
PJ Harding, and I want this to be a place
where you can come hang out on the weekend, relax,
reflect and tap into ways of getting through tough times.
There's so much noise in the world. We have more
information than ever and we're all so overstimulated. I want
to strip it back, get to the core of what
it means to be a human will discovering beautiful and
(00:30):
simple ways to stay sane in the chaos. No judgment,
just a safe and inspiring space where hopefully you can
catch up with your week's laundry. This week on the show,
I am joined by someone that a lot of New
Zealanders will be well familiar with, Matilda Green. She obviously
came onto the scene in twenty fifteen when she entered
(00:50):
the first season of New Zealand's The Bachelor, and she
was one of the lucky ones. She ended up actually
finding love and going on to marrying Art. The two
have now got three beautiful children, living semi rurally outside
of the big smoke of Auckland and Warkworth. And I've
always really looked up to Matilda. I think she is
(01:11):
a beautiful role model. She's always been really open about
prioritizing health and I wanted to tap into her brain
this week because obviously there's a lot going on. She's
got three kids, she's working, she's got a podcast, and
I just wanted to know her survival tips and tricks
and how you can thrive in the season that she's
(01:31):
currently in. I hope you enjoy the chat. Matilda Green
is joining me for Sloight Down. How are you doing?
Speaker 1 (01:41):
I'm so good. I'm sitting here in my lounge. It's
like a grade rizzly day and got my baby Penny
beside me, who is just going to be passed over
to act. But I feel very calm and just so
excited for this.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
Is calm like a common state of mind for you,
as a mum of three, podcaster and all around probably
quite busy woman.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
I think I work really hard to bring the calm,
if you know what I mean. Like, if I didn't
put that work in to bring the calm, then it
would be chaos. So I know that that's a really
big priority for me, is to set aside time for
meditation and different bits and bobs, just so I can
be in a calm space when things are going to shit?
(02:29):
Can I say shit?
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Absolutely? You can say all of the shits and all
of the pities, you know.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
When things are really going crazy. Then I know that
I am not going to get dragged into it emotionally,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
Okay, so we'll get more into like the rituals and
things you like to do, son, but paint us the
picture of your general weake like your week days, in
your weekend. How does that kind of look at the moment.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
So it's very fluid. I was telling a friend about
this recently, actually, about how so many of mine and
arts conversations are around logistics.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Oh my god, can we just shut up so sexy?
I know, with your logistics?
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Oh yeah, like what are you doing Monday afternoon? Because
I'm going to be out and who's gonna look after pennies?
So it's just very much who's doing what, what's your
week looking like? What's my week looking like? And who's
picking up dropping off? That sort of thing. But in
a general week, So I do like pick up and
drop off for the older two preschool four days a week,
(03:34):
and then Penny's home with me, and then all kids
are home on a Wednesday. So can you hear about
crushing in the background? So about that?
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Ant's just hey, look, we're thriving in the chaos. This
is what it's all about. What's he doing?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
He is in the kitchen ap currently.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Oh my god, how stress red nose.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
It's actually this is okay because it's it's a cosmetic
reg ok so there's no like removing of big parts
of the house or anything. So it's okay. But yeah,
poor Art, he's he's he's said it bit on with
trying to get this done with three kids around. Yea, yeah,
And so that's that's sort of how it looks. And
on the weekend we prioritize family time and we're going
(04:17):
to a lot of birthday parties. That's pretty common. Yeah,
I'm just doing fun stuff. We'd like, go for cool hikes,
go to the beach, do lots of different things. I
go to the library during the week with Penny, we
do wriggle and rhyme. You know, that's really what we're
doing on a weekly base.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
Are you quite rigid with routine or are you do
you kind of like organized chaos or do you roll
the flow? What sort of works best? For you.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
I always thought that I would be a go with
the flow hype of mum, because that's how I am
usually as a person. I don't do a lot of planning.
But I've found it's really hard to thrive in chaos,
and it makes my life so much easier when I
have some sort of structure. So I try and plan
it out on a Sunday how the week's going to look,
and loosely what we're gonna do, And oh my god,
(05:08):
it makes such a big difference when I can plan
out meals. I know what the plan is for the week,
and but but I don't. I think I've learned after
having three kids now that you can't be too rigid
in your plans.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Because anything could happen constantly.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Someone's got a fever, or someone's just like I don't
want to do that. So you know, there's there's a
bit of movement in the in the in the routine.
But yeah, it helps me a lot to have structure.
It makes me feel like I'm somewhat in control.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
I am exactly the same way. I always thought I
was a happy, go lucky, spontaneous person who didn't need
no routine, And like now, I'm working with the toddler,
and I actually I need it. My brain just I
can't contain my brain otherwise and there's just constant noise
and chaos, and I just I've realized I have to
(06:00):
and the meals ahead. Like I never thought i'd be
a whelproper, you know, I have to have that Sunday.
The Sunday I need dedicated to feeling like I'm getting
on top of shirt.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
It's key, it's yeah, And how are you finding me
back on the tools?
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Yeah, it's initially a real emotional juggle, but I feel
like the more you do it, the more it just
feels like normal. But God, you feel so out of
sorts at the beginning, especially when like these briastfeeding in
the max or whatever. Your brain's just not there. But
I think the more time you spend at work kind
(06:35):
of doing your thing, it kind of just becomes more normal.
But it was definitely a real awkward dance at the beginning,
and that guilt because my mom is looking after Charlie,
who's nearly two, like all the time, which which is
a lot, you know, even though she's like, I love
it and hurt. My grandmother did that for me it's
really special, really special, but it's probably not sustainable long term.
(06:59):
We're going to have to give a danger. But no,
it is really nice. But but yeah, the mum girl
and all that definitely look loves to cray on every
now and then. But I want to talk about your
rattuels that you were talking about, that are sort of
your non negotiables that you know, when that chaos does come,
those waves decide to roll on in. You know that
(07:21):
it's going to help you at big time. So what
how does that look for you?
Speaker 1 (07:26):
My meditation practice is really important to me. So I
learned vade meditation through Georgi of Ebbsat and honestly, I'm
just so grateful that I did that. So I did
that I think four years ago when I was how
Milo must have been around one. So yeah, my oldest
(07:46):
Milo was around one and and I got the practice.
And it's been really difficult to bring it into a
daily routine, really hard. There's no sugarcoating it. It's when
people are like, oh, just you know, make sure you
do it, set aside the time, first thing in the morning.
It is hard for kids and some days I just
(08:07):
don't get to it. But I really feel a difference.
I just find that, you know, when sometimes you lose
you shit as at much. And hey, some listeners might
be like, I can't really how auld are you? No?
Speaker 2 (08:21):
No, no, the fuse the short fuse is a real thing.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Yeah. But I find that when I'm prioritizing that meditation practice,
I'm like way further away from that breaking point, so
like I can still get there where I'm just like
it's too much, I've lost my shit, but it's it
takes a lot more for me to get there, so
I've got a lot more bandwidth. And so the meditation
practice is the first one, and the second one is
(08:45):
music and dance. I love music, I always have and honestly,
if I can just put on some music and just
vibe out in the kitchen for five to ten minutes,
it makes such a difference. And like prioritizing fun as well,
because sometimes when things are just crazy, kids are getting
(09:06):
on my left, it it's just like all too much.
Like if I can just be like, do you know what,
I'm just going to lean in and we're just going
to be real silly and have a great time and
let's just trash the house and have fun and I'm
going to deal with it later. That's been really like
I know it doesn't sound like much, but that has
been a changer for me to just lean into the fun,
(09:28):
you know, like that that's all kids want to do.
It's their first priority are And I always laugh about
it that, like they get up in the morning and
they're like, what am I going to do today? Have fun?
And that's all they want to do.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
It's beautiful, and we just.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
Try and lean in. Just do it, have fun, be silly, and.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
It's all about how you make them feel. And you know,
looking back, it's not going to be all the things
that you had or all the things you know that
you were focused on. It was actually on how you
made them feel. So if you're bringing fun, I think
that's everything. I always find that there's a playlist. It
was actually my birthday playlist. It's got like lots of
like really like wholesome tricks like the Verve, but a
sweet symphony, you know, just tracked. Honestly, I'll put that
(10:09):
playlist on and it just brings me back to what
really matters. I'll be, you know, having a moment and
then I just put that on and I'm like life
is beautiful. I'm really grateful.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Like how music can do that again, brings you back
to the moment you're like, oh, this doesn't.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Matter no once your go to or do you mix
it up? Ah?
Speaker 1 (10:28):
I really mix it up. My Spotify is all over
the show.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
I am a real.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Classic rock kind of fan. But then just everything, truly everything,
Like if I'm gonna it depends on the mood I'm in,
Like if I'm feeling kind of like melancholy, i might
put on a little bit of like Nasy star.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
Like that, yeah, that sort of thing. And then if
I'm feeling like I want to tackle the day, you
might do like Queen m Michael Jackson. Controversial but you
know that that sort of thing.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
So just to that whole Michael Jackson thing, I feel
like the world's closed over that. The last couple it
was real controversial and now everyone was like, I just
like his music.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
Always, so people are like Boycott like Tacon I mean,
I do like that song. I'm just gonna play it
the once today.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
Oh dear, Now, look looking at your life from the outside,
a lot of people would say you've got a lot
of gifts, you know, like you're very lucky and you've
got a beautiful life. Do you ever fall victim to
the grass's green and mentality? You wish that you know
things are a little bit different, You wish that you
were doing this or that, And because leaks be honest,
(11:48):
Instagram is never like an absolute accurate portrayal of our lives.
Do you, Matilda Green, find that you do full victim
to a bit of rose colored glasses from time to time?
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Yes, one hundred percent. Yes. But I think I've gotten
a lot better now at noticing when I'm feeling like that,
like I can, and usually I can pinpoint it to
something else. So if I'm feeling like I'm comparing myself
to other people, whether they've got i don't know, more
money or a better house or whatever it is, I
(12:25):
can usually think, ah, do you know what? I've been
spending too much time on my phone recently, which is
usually linked to me feeling shitty. Yeap, So it's all
this vicious cycle. When I'm feeling tired and a bit
burnt out and just not quite on my game mentally,
then I spend more time on my phone, and then
(12:46):
I start comparing myself, and then I can I can
usually snap myself out of it pretty quick by just count.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Looks like there's a head popping into the frame. Is
Penny or is it a dog?
Speaker 1 (12:59):
It's a little dog. Okay, cool, that's faster. And yeah,
I truly am so grateful every single day, and I
count my blessings no matter what. I really, I really
don't take anything in my life for granted, and I
just have to remind myself of that whenever I feel
because we all fall victim to it sometimes, I think.
(13:23):
And it depends on the situation you're in, Like sometimes
you could be in a group where you know everyone's
got lots of money or something, or it just depends
and then you start comparing yourself. But really, we're all
so lucky, so so lucky.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
And what does success mean to you? If you were
to answer that in a sentence, how would you define it?
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Success?
Speaker 2 (13:47):
To me?
Speaker 1 (13:48):
I think means living a life that I can be
proud of in front of my kids. So if that
can be an example for them, then that's true success.
That's all it comes down to for me.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
And when are you in your most proud moments? Like
if you could think back to when you had the
most pride. What would it be.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
I think probably after the birth of my son Milo.
I that moment for me was the most incredible moment
of my entire life, after going through such a long
journey of you know, pregnancy and labor and all of that.
And I remember just lying in bed holding him because
(14:36):
I had a home birth, so I got to be
in my own bed, which was so nice, and I
was holding him just thinking like I can do anything.
And I think it was also like the hormones and
the feeling of like he's here, I get to meet him.
This is the person that's been a part of me
for so long, that I've talked to in my belly
and that I feel so bonded to. Now he's he's here,
He's a person I can I can look into his eyes.
(15:01):
And I also felt like go me. You know. I
really did think like I can achieve anything if I
put my mind to it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
And those hormones they really are wild, like wild drugs.
And I think that's so like telling you know, because
it is sort of coming through like a really hard
time and having that and I think like you learn
a lot from life in that moment, right of like,
you know, good things are worth real hard work and
(15:30):
hard times, and it's not just going to be an
easy road. And also like expect the unexpected, don't even
know what's going to freaking happen, and you kind of
just have to roll with the punches. Yeah, is there
a quote or some kind of mantra that you like
to live your life by, whether it's consciously or subconsciously.
(15:52):
Is this something that you kind of revert back to
sometimes when things are getting a bit tough.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
Yeah, I've got two. So one is one is life
begins at the end of your comfort zone, which is
kind of like what you're saying about how nothing worth
having comes easy right there. Discomfort is a good thing
and just being comfortable all the time is not necessarily
healthy or helpful for you. And I try and live
(16:20):
my life that way and think, if this is feeling scary,
then maybe it's worth doing. And the second one is
can't win the more honestly, like that is just that's
saying helps me so much, Like if something goes wrong
or maybe I didn't get an opportunity, if something falls through,
or if you know, I haven't had a great day
(16:44):
on the parenting tools, I just go oh, I can't
win them all, and it really helps me because it
takes the charge out of it as well. And it's just,
oh wow, tomorrow's a new day. It's just it is
what it is. It can't be perfect all the time.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
But you can win the war. You can lose a
few battles, but you can still win the war.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Right, there's still chance, you know, like we can bring
it there tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
It's okay when you look back to you know how
your life in the media kind of started years back
when you're on The Bachelor, Like how old were you?
Speaker 1 (17:13):
I was twenty four? Oh my god, And I cannot
watch that again because I'm like, who is that? Who
is that child on the show?
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Would you do anything different? I mean, look, it worked
out pretty well for you, but would you have done
anything different? Like looking back through your journey of your
entrance into the public arena.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
Oh, so many things, Okay, so many things. I think
I've evolved so much as a person, so it's it's
hard to think, Oh, I wish I'd done that differently
because I kind of was a different person. You know,
we all change as we get older. But I think
for me, I wish i'd been a little bit more
authentically myself because I was such a people pleaser at
(18:05):
that time in my life, especially like extreme, So I
just wish I had had had the courage to say
what I really thought and stood up for myself a
bit more and just had had the guts to have
more of an opinion.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
Big time.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Yeah. Yeah, but I think I just you know, I
was young twenty four and twenty four at the time,
I was like, I'm really mature, and then now that
I'm almost thirty four, like, I don't know, should think
I was mature to be honest.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Yeah, Look, you can't go through life with regrets, but
you can, certainly, I guess, go through and evaluate, but
you got to be you got to be count yourself.
You can reflect, and I think being authentic is probably
one of the hardest things for a lot of people,
Like we're just so especially the world of and right now,
it's just so hard to say something and then you
(19:03):
don't know how it's going to go, and then you're like, well,
there we go. That's gonna alienate me or that's gonna
It's a really interesting space that we're in right now,
where you know, people will have to be so careful
with what they say. And yeah, I hope that people
kind of do find their authenticity. I think that's the
ultimate in life. Really.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Yeah, yeah, I think so too. And we're in this
bizarre time where everyone is expected to have an opinion
on everything, and I think it's actually really unhelpful to
be honest, because no one's one opinion holds more weight
than anyone else's. And it's this weird time, isn't it,
(19:48):
where just because somebody has a social media following, get
expected to like have this public stance on so many
different issues. And it's like, Okay, I got followers from
going on The Bachelor, Like do you want.
Speaker 2 (19:59):
Me to yeah, into the geopolitical as exactly? I know,
I know, and yeah, it's it's not it's not normal.
It's not normal. And also the exposure that we have
to every single thing that goes on in the world,
Like back in villages times when we were like cave
me in, you know, you didn't know half the shit
that was going on. It's just like so much information,
(20:21):
whether it's even about health stuff or whether it's about
political stuff. It's so hard to wag through.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
And like nobody knows what's what's true anymore. Just like
somebody somebody sees something on Instagram with like a in
an authoritative way, You're like, oh, well, you know that
must be that must be true. And then someone else
say something completely different in a confident, abative.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
Way exactly, and then you're like, what just sucking side
do I take? I think the most important thing for
sanity is to just try and step away and like
absorb your world like the most. I think the most
beneficial thing you can do is be a positive impact
on your like immediate community, right, one hundred percent, yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:02):
Because that's that's somewhere where you can make a direct impact,
Like if you are an active part of your community
looking after those around you and and being an example
to your children about how to look after those around
you and and care for people and help others, that
is that's, in my opinion, one of the best things
(21:26):
you can do, because then you're raising those people to
help the people around them, and then it's a you know,
it's a blow on effect of positivity.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Do you have any role models that you looked up
to or that you've even in the last ten years,
someone that you look up to now that you're like man,
they've got it going on.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
So many people. But do you know what, mostly my
family and my neighbors like some honestly, like the people
that are in my community are so generous and giving.
And it's not that they have all of the stuff
(22:06):
to give, and it's just that's that's the community spirit.
And these people are just so kind and so generous.
And I think since moving to a smaller community from
the city, I've learned so much from them about how
important it is to look after those around you and
be active in fostering those relationships around you and in
(22:27):
your community, because it doesn't just happen like you do.
Actually have to make an effort to be a part
of a community to have the community.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
I found that big time moving rurally, Like, the community
spirit is wild. When I lived in the city for
so many years, I know even you my neighbors never
had any assistance striped through hard times. When anything happens,
they all band together and it's just the most beautiful thing.
And I think it is how we're supposed to live
as human beings, especially when there's children in the mix.
(22:54):
Like it does take a village and it takes a
community to actually stay sane, and I think that's why
there's so many issues going on now, like people feel
like they're forced to do it all on their own life.
If we could have been together. This is student like
an inspirational but isn't it true, like we need other
humans to survive.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Yeah, yeah, because social media gives us the illusion of connection,
but it's not connection, not at all. Like if anything,
it's well, I mean, we can just take one lock
at all the mental health stats and see that it's
not working. When we're like, we're we're connected, but we're
actually the less the least connected we've ever been. And
(23:35):
it's really sad. When we had the same situation when
we lived in Auckland, our neighbors like we'd come and
go and we were the same age. We probably should
have made an effort to be friends, but the only
time we ever interacted was when they was when their
dog escaped and I and so it was in the
morning and I was holding my coffee and I was
(23:58):
holding the dog. I was calling them and I didn't
realize but like I was bending down to and get
the dog. And then as I was bending down, I
was pouring coffee on its head.
Speaker 2 (24:07):
And I didn't even fuck and that's when we left
the city.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
Yeah, I was like this, so so then I had
to be like, hey, I've got your dog and also
I'm really sorry I bourn coffee all over.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
How did they go down? Did they talked to you afterwards?
Speaker 1 (24:22):
All? I know? It was just an awkward interaction and
they were like, oh, that's okay. I was like sorry,
I didn't mentor and they were like, yeah, that's okay.
We're going to take the dog now.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
So you won't be moving back to the city anytime.
So so you line up there. So you guys are
like out of the city quite not rural, but like
small town small small town.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
Yes, well, like it's not that small. I don't know
what the population of Walkward, US have you five thousand?
Speaker 2 (24:50):
Yeah, it's Ce's it's tweet on the way tweet Tweet's
not the right word.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
It's i'd say it's medium small town. Yeah, but it's
it's it's growing pretty rapidly, and some of the og
locals are not happy about it.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
They're not they're not in training. You haven't got McDonald's
or the wee house coming in of you at the
warehouse to be here We've got the warehouse and it
goes off, it pops off. It's great for kids.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
I'm saying to actually, like, you know what we need.
We need a kid's boutique, you know, like we need
a kids drop in town where people can go and
get their their kids party supplies.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
You're going to advocate breaking kids boutique.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
From even start. One.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Been so nice chatting with you today. I want to
finish on what advice you would give to your eighteen
year old self. I know we talked about like looking
back at the Bachelor of that if you could talk
to a younger version of yourself, knowing what's ahead, what
would you tell yourself?
Speaker 1 (25:52):
The first thing would be lay off the fake han
for the of God, it's just it's just not okay.
And the main, the main serious one is because I
went through school with most people telling me that I
wasn't an athlete and that I wasn't academic, and so
I had these these beliefs from when I was really
(26:13):
young to when I finished school, thinking, right, I'm not
smart and I'm not good at sports, So what's left
I'm good with people? Okay, so that's a pretty small pool.
So I'll go into sales and like, which was great,
But I really wish that I could tell myself, like,
you are smart and you can achieve whatever you want
to achieve. And I just wish I had had more
(26:36):
voices telling me that through school. And it has made
me realize how important it is not to label your
children as well, because they really take it on board
like oh, you're shy, you're quiet, you're sporty, you're this,
you're smart, you're not good at writing, you're good at this,
because they believe it and they think, oh, okay, well I'm
not good at that, so that's the reality. Yeah, yeah,
(26:59):
yeah exactly. So I really wish I could tell eighteen
year old me that you can achieve it if if
you try, you're not done.
Speaker 2 (27:08):
That's beautiful. Well, I'm so grateful for you popping on
today and having a little chat and having like a
little lens into your life behind the behind the scenes
of Matilda Green.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
Thanks for having me. It was lovely to catch up
and just be a part of this zen moments.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Lovely, mist I should have told you to bring a
cup of tea or something. I've actually got my oil
b Do you like that?
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Yeah? To the side, Oh that's nice. I've just got
a dog and a lot of mess, so I won't
show you the backdrop.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
Hey, that's what it's all about, the realness of being human. Matilda,
thank you so much. I really really appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
Thanks Pja.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Listening back to that chat, I really wish I had
dived into a few more questions with Matilda, but I
ended up cutting it short, and I've still got more
I want to talk to her about. But there were
a few things that really did stick out to me
this week, and I loved that. You know, when she
is feeling overwhelmed or she's about to lose a shit,
she'll reset with a dance in the kitchen, with like
(28:16):
a little you know, a little dance party. It's that simple.
Just turning on music really loudly, and it doesn't matter, Like,
don't care if it's a cool song or not. Just
blast it loudly and it does reset the mode. I
found it so so effective when my toldles melting darden
or having a tantrum, or just the day it feels
really hard. As I said, I put on that birth
(28:39):
playlist and it just brings me back to what really
matters in life. I also love how she made it
clear of what her non negotible is.
Speaker 1 (28:46):
Now.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
I'm sure there's lots of things that she does also
incorporate into a routine, but the meditation, and I know
that's also really kind of off putting for a lot
of people. They think, shit, I can't sit that still
for that amount of time. I learned vadic meditation. Gosh,
when was it? When I was in Melbourne on breakfast
radio and I was sleep deprived, and I just remember
(29:10):
how incredible it was. They say it's like equivalent to
a few hours sleep or something like that. Who do
it properly? You set yourself out to do it twice
a day, twenty minutes each time. Now as your parent,
there can differ, but I think trying to stick to
doing that as much as possible. It does. There's so
much research and science behind it. It really is a
(29:33):
magical tool. So I love that she has put that
as one of her Nona Gosh balls. I was really
related with her move to walk with in that small
community and the impact that that's had on her life
and seeing firsthand the simple acts of community and how
they really make a difference, And you know that kind
(29:53):
of stuff is so much more important than posting the
latest opinion on the latest thing that's going on in
the news and feeling value from that. I mean, I'm
not saying that that doesn't have a place. It absolutely does,
But I think it can feel really overwhelming when there's
so much going on and you feel like you're not
contributing to the world. One way of getting back to
(30:15):
feeling like you are making some kind of difference as
tepping into your community and seeing your acts firsthand pay off.
So that really sat with me, and I loved her
advice to her younger self. I'm going to kind of
paraphrase it here, but the way I read it was,
don't absorb what others think of you, because look, they
could tell you a green elephant, and if you hear
(30:37):
that enough, you will genuinely believe it. And that's what
we do, right. People will tell you you're not sporty,
you're not good enough, you're not this, you're not that,
and you genuinely believe it if you hear it enough.
So it's finding that strength in yourself to know who
you are. And I don't think that you get that
when you're younger. That happens when you grow up, you
have experiences, and you learn who you are who you
(31:00):
know as the years go by. But it's something we
can all take something from, you know, standing true to
yourself and not believing every negative word that someone has
to say about you. So yeah, I really enjoyed my
catch up with Matilda this week. As I said, I
do wish actually I kind of dived a little bit
deeper and now I'm looking back. We could have gone
(31:22):
on some wild tangents, but look, I hope you've got
something out of it. I'd love to know your thoughts
on this week's episode, and if you've got any suggestions
for other people who'd be a great fit for the podcast,
get in touch with me on Instagram at PJDJ and
I'll be back next week. Have a good one.
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