November 9, 2024 • 39 mins
Cassandra Grodd is an author, an entrepreneur and a wellness advocate. It would be easy to typecast her, but everyone's journeys have twists, and Cassandra is no different.
From a battling with an eating disorder as a teenager, and struggling to find confidence in herself, she's embraced the idea of fake it until you make it and designed a life so that she can be her best self. In this episode she talks about dedicating time to set up your day and bringing main character energy. I really appreciate how she trusts herself, and I hope you're as inspired by this conversation as I was!
About the show:
Life is fast. Information is overwhelming. We seem busier and more anxious than ever. Introducing ‘Slow It Down’. A time to chill, wind down and join a space that inspires people to live authentically and slow it down. A hub for living more consciously and incorporating mindful practices and rituals in an achievable way. The aim is to showcase guests who have chosen to live a more balanced lifestyle mixed in with experts who offer tangible tips and tricks to feel a little more zen.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
With the Heads Podcast Network.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Hi, welcome back to another episode of Slow It Down.
I am your host, PJ Harding, and I am loving
hearing your feedback on all of the episodes that we've
released so far.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Don't be shy to get in touch.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Let me know what's resonating, what's not resonating, what you
want to hear more of this podcast.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Obviously, I am on a journey.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
To work out how people find peace and the chaos.
It's not about getting rid of the chaos, but it's
about working out what rituals and practices people do to
stay sane in this crazy world, and it is certainly
extra crazy at the moment. This week, I am joined
by an incredible woman who's all but I first came
(00:54):
into contact with I can't remember if it was the
end of last year or the beginning of this year.
And when I saw her, I thought, she is captivating.
She has a real enthusiasm for life, an infectious energy.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
And she knows what she wants.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
And I thought, that's what we need on the podcast
this week, a bit of uplifting talk.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
So I wanted to get.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
Inside the brain of Cassandra Grodd. She is an author, podcaster,
and content creator, and in this episode we talk about confidence.
Has she always been as confident as she appears online?
The answer is no, and the process that she's gone
on is really interesting and that journey that she has
(01:40):
taken to feel really comfortable in her own skin, So
we dive into that in so much more. I hope
you get a lot out of this chat, like I
did my conversation with Cassandra Grod. I do just want
to do a trigger warning before we get into the podcast,
(02:00):
as there is content that is sensitive in nature as
we discuss topics such as eating disorders. So I would
encourage you to take a break during the episode if
it all becomes too much, or make an informed decision
that this content isn't right for you.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Okays, welcome to slow it down.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
Thank you so much and honored to be here.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
I first came across you when we were on a
bit of a conference with Hannah Krera and it was
like this beautiful weekend session and that's when I first
got to hear you. And I must say, you have
very beautiful, infectious energy that you kind of.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Just want more of. I think you've got such a
zest for life.
Speaker 4 (02:41):
Ah, what a compliment, I would say the exact same.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Thing to you, because I know that it's possibly not
always been like that, and I feel like you have
been on a real journey of coming to love yourself.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Is that right correct?
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Absolutely?
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Because you've got two books out called Bully and Karling,
and can you run through just quickly the premise of
those two books and how you ended up freaking writing
books in the first place.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
So. I struggled really intimately with an eating disorder through
my teenage years. So I had bulimia from I remember
having balimic tendencies from when I was quite tiny, and
I dissected all about where that came from and a
lot of therapy, but it was something that I just
lived with and it was this incredible secret and it
(03:30):
held hands with anxiety disorder, which I was medicated for
at one point, body dysmorphia, everything under that category, and
writing and creativity for me was an outlet and it
was something that just happened really, really naturally. And at
the same time, I joined social media right when it
(03:51):
was booming, and I remember when it first came out
and I was seventeen, and we posted photos of like
tank and sushi and like how weird friends in high
school were filtered, and I coincided with the platform that
is Instagram, and I just naturally was someone who sort
of gained attention.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
And when I.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
First joined social media, I was in a very very
dark place in terms of how I saw myself and
how I perceived myself, and I was presenting myself as
something I wasn't in a way. And one day I
shared a piece of writing and I was living in
the UK at the time, and I remember I went
to the bathroom and I came back and I had
(04:32):
fifty d ms PJ Wow, And I was like, shut
the front door. I'm Kylie Jenner. Everybody can leave.
Speaker 3 (04:40):
This is the most success any human has ever experienced.
Speaker 4 (04:44):
And there was this massive encouragement for me to keep going,
and I just started sharing writing my platform built. People
were like, give us a book. And I had no
idea what the frick I was doing. I just the
whole thing was me and free answers that I hired
off Fiber and great friends of mine.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
And put the book out Lightning Head Earth, and it
did exceptionally well.
Speaker 4 (05:08):
It was third on the Amazon best sellers and remained
up there. It stayed on the charts for quite a
while and I went on to do my second one.
So to answer your question, I think writing was the
a sort of a pinnacle point of an incredible journey
i'd have I'd had with discovering myself through this eating disorder,
(05:31):
and that's what the books are about, essentially.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
And so you were talking about how like the life
that you were projecting online differed from how you were feeling.
What was the process of aligning your true self with
what you were projecting out there.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
It's funny because when.
Speaker 4 (05:49):
I say that it could be taken in a negative context,
it actually worked really positively for me because it was
this breath of air where I would post online as
the super confident girl, and I think somewhere along the
way my brain started to go, oh, wait, we actually
can be that person. So it was potentially a little
(06:11):
bit of a fake it till you make it, and
it was also a moment of showing myself what's possible.
Social media gets a really bad, bad stick of it,
but it actually worked quite harmoniously for me as long
as I was doing the inner work at the same time.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
And I think doing the inner.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Work working through the trauma, working through the things in
my childhood, working through the shadow, finding this radical acceptance
of myself and my body and forgiving myself. That's when
the presentation and the image and what I actually believed
to be true lined up.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
And it didn't.
Speaker 4 (06:48):
It wasn't overnight like it was. I'm about to be
twenty eight, so I've been on this platform posting photos
of myself for a wee while.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Yeah, that's so interesting that you actually found it worked
and your favorite and it was almost like, I guess,
not like a mood board, but you'd be kind of
trying to curate how you wanted to feel. And as
long as you were doing that kind of internal work,
then you really felt like you eventually kind of got
(07:16):
there And did that take a lot of I don't know, obviously,
this is because I know you're a bit of a
gym when it comes to manifestation. Is that when you
really started getting that into gear as well?
Speaker 3 (07:28):
Absolutely, well, I'll butcher this.
Speaker 4 (07:30):
I don't know the exact you know, someone listening out
there will give me a lot of shit for this.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
I butcher all my quotes.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
If you're about to butcher right, I really appreciate it.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Wasn't there.
Speaker 4 (07:40):
I know, right, like I say things on mine and
I'm like right. So there was a study done, I
believe it was by Harvard, and they measured the strongest
emotion that can be admitted from the human body. And
how they measured this, dear God, don't ask me, but
they did. And the strongest emotion or state of being
(08:02):
that a human could be in was authenticity.
Speaker 3 (08:06):
So it was on the scale. Authenticity was right up.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
And then it was forgiveness I believe in, then gratitude
And when we think of that word you through out there,
that's manifestation.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
It's very commercial.
Speaker 4 (08:18):
Now, what manifestation means is that you are as close
to living your authentic life as possible.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
So if you've got your.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Ship pointed in your true direction and you're not pretending,
and it takes going through the layers of where am
I not being myself right? Where am I performing? Where
am I pushing? Where am I moving something uphill? Where
am I people pleasing? Where am I saying yes when
I should be saying no? And it's manifestation is actually
(08:50):
just about lifting your self respect. So for something like
healing and eating disorder, which is quite a disrespectful behavior
to do to yourself. Naturally, in that process, I found
my way to manifestation.
Speaker 3 (09:05):
And so manifestation can be really.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
Spiritual and crystals and whatnot, but then it can also
be really tangible and just like when you treat yourself right,
the universe treats you right. That's what started to really
click and change for me, and it changed everything. It
changed how I look physically. That energy that you talk about,
that zest for life, that positivity that cut path full.
(09:31):
It all started with how I was treating myself. And
if I was going to binge and purge over a
toilet four days a week, that's not a very great
way that I can four days week, four times a day. Rather,
it's not a great way that I can tell myself
and any other aspect of my life that I come first.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
Wow, Authenticity is like obviously another word that's thrown around
a lot, but it's probably something that a lot of
people really really struggle to be truly authentic, whether it's
being in a job that they.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
Just aren't quite aligned with.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
A relationship, living where they're not quite you know, content with.
So you were saying, like going through all the things
that you know you're not.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Oh, I can't remember how you exactly worded.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
It, but the way you're pretending.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Yeah, So would you like, do you have a tangible
way that people listening right now can kind of do
a checklist in their brain if they're being authentic, because
sometimes it is. It's one of those things that's really
hard to measure.
Speaker 4 (10:36):
I would say that the first thing you need to
do is you need to listen to your body. So
you need to take the space, whether that's five minutes
in the morning, five minutes at night, whether you're at
that job that you hate that you don't really need
cash to give you a checklist because you know you.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
Fricking hate it there.
Speaker 4 (10:57):
And I like to put my hands on my womb
or like lower stomach if you hate that word everyone
hates sorry wom.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
Hey, Wom's beautiful. Something quite confronting about the word worm.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
Yeah, but it's so beautiful.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
But like, yeah, yeah, it's like kind of near moist,
it is. I'm with you, but you can, you know,
you put your hands on your womb and take a
deep breath and really notice where your breath is heading,
how deep it's going in. And I like to ask myself,
what do I need to know? And also you can
(11:35):
ask yourself what's true. So when you sit with your
body and it might tell you nothing, or it might
tell you everything. It might tell you so many things
that aren't true, you're a bit confronted.
Speaker 3 (11:45):
But you're going to.
Speaker 4 (11:46):
Start to feel tension towards what won't be right. And
I think you were talking earlier about this podcast being
about people who.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
Move very fast.
Speaker 4 (11:58):
And if you're moving fast and a big player, and
we will arm we have loads of things going on
in our life that five minutes every morning, every evening,
in the middle of your day, where you ask yourself,
have I been honest with myself?
Speaker 3 (12:14):
Or am I betraying myself right?
Speaker 4 (12:17):
And that sense of betrayal to the self will come
through very strongly in your body, and it's going to
give you quite a strong compass and my experience of
what's working and what's not. And beyond that, pay attention
to how you feel at the end of little things,
end of a meeting, end of a friend hangout, end
(12:37):
of a date. Do you leave and you feel like
high energy? Do you leave and you feel low energy?
And so getting out of our head and all this
like mental thinking and YadA YadA, and actually listening to
our feeling level of what feels good and what works
for us.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
That's my tangible tip.
Speaker 4 (12:56):
That's something that I practiced every single day for authenticity.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
I love that, and I because I've I have a
little bit of worm from time to time, and like
you often hear about like the full body yees, like
getting that full body yees, but that can take a
while again to really.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
Get in tune with yourself.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
And so it comes down to I supose that regular practice,
so you you really start to know what the signals
mean in your body when there is that insane resistance
right when it's like, nah, this isn't right, because your
body ultimately knows. It's a very great tip that I
think we can walk away with today. So thank you course.
(13:41):
So what about when kes is feeling really blur or
really yuck and she's in a bit of a rut.
How do you navigate through that and how do you
often reset?
Speaker 4 (13:54):
I have two answers for that. The first answer is
my practices. So I am very very grounded and loyal
to my practices. And when I start to feel off track,
I notice that I've slipped from the things that make
me feel great. So my morning routine is so sacred
(14:17):
to me. It is meticulous, it is perfected. It is
like I'm the most annoying person you'd ever mate, but
I'm on an empty stomach. People tell me, I saw
you walking and you were smiling, like you looked insane.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
You were smiling so much.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
And it's because I have this.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Walking meditation and sometimes I chant, and sometimes I put
my arms out and I say my affirmation and I
come back from this walk and I'm blowing and people
are sort of like, my alarm hasn't gone.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
Off, So so talk I throw your meticulous routine.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
I want to hear it.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
Okay, So it starts six a m.
Speaker 4 (14:53):
And I have a bone broth with so I'm not
sure if anyone knows much about bone broth. It's very
good for your collagen, YadA.
Speaker 3 (14:59):
YadA on drop and then I will have some supplements.
Speaker 4 (15:02):
So I take my Eve Wellness, blood, sugar Babe, and
vitamin C and.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
Then I go for my walk. My walk is forty five.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
Minutes, and I listen to a walking meditation of myself
or of doctor Joe Despenser.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Oh, he's the man.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
He's the man.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
I was listening to us audiover the other day, although
I was trying to drive long distances, and I must
say it was not the best thing to stay awake.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
In the car, but some of his serving voice knowledge.
I think meditation that I do it's unreal amazing.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
I love that everyone needs to do it. It's like
you go through who you used to be, who you.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
Want to be, and you actually like I like walking
through my meditation because I literally walk into the person
I'm trying to become.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
Come back. If it's a really good day, I'm going
to the gymeral plates.
Speaker 4 (15:49):
If it's not that type of day, I'm sitting and
doing twenty.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Minutes of breath work. I do Awaken breathwork. You have
incredible shout out Awaken, look as Mac hewe awesome guy.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
I'll journal anything that comes up. Then I'm having my breakfast,
which is high protein the rest of my supplements. I'm showering,
and then I go and I have my coffee after
I've eaten an hour and a half after I wake up.
Speaker 3 (16:13):
Everybody's super important changed my whole life.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
And wait, wait, you have the coffee an hour after you'veden.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
Yeah, no, sorry, an hour after I've waken up.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Oh okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 4 (16:23):
Food and tummy high proteins, and then I'll go and
I like to sit with my coffee and make it
a moment and really enjoy it and be slow with it.
And that's my slow little moment, and I go through
my day and my to do list, and that's how
I start my morning.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
I love.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
I mean, I have a toddler, so I can imagine
other parents out there right now, are like the sounds
like a dream routine, And yes, I can maybe doing
about of kids. So like, look, everyone has to kind
of work around the time that they've got. But I
love the dedication that you've got and you just know
that for you and when you don't do that, then
(17:02):
you start feeling out of alignment.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Right.
Speaker 3 (17:05):
Yeah, Well, my whole.
Speaker 4 (17:06):
Thing with it is is that that's my life changed
when I got a morning routine, because that's how I
tell the universe that I come first. So before I
go to that big meeting or before I'm doing things
for everyone else, I'm doing.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
Something for me.
Speaker 4 (17:21):
And I swear when I started admitting that into the world,
the whole world started to go, oh, okay, you come first.
Speaker 3 (17:28):
You're prioritizing yourself.
Speaker 4 (17:30):
So I'm sure everyone can't do the cast Rod two
hours all the morning routine, because sometimes Cas Grod can't
do that. Even if it's like the five minute chicken
with your body, have it stacked, do that in the shower.
You can take a couple of supplements for yourself. You
can have a nourishing breakfast whilst you're making your families.
(17:51):
Incorporate it in a way that works for you.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
You know.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
I love that. Do you even feel self doubt or
and secure?
Speaker 3 (18:00):
Yeah, one hundred percent so you of course yes.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Taught me through it.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Taught me through what happens when you when you feel
all of that, well, it.
Speaker 3 (18:08):
Normally comes for me.
Speaker 4 (18:10):
I wonder if you relate to this after I've put
something out so I don't really doubt myself free launching it.
I have this very bizarre confidence that I get from
my dad, who's super German. He thinks everything he does
is great, and like, I'm just like this is awesome, Like, guys,
look at this photo.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
I look amazing. Wow. And then I put it out
there and I'm like I hate everything about this.
Speaker 4 (18:31):
Yeah, or I sometimes will just have imposter syndrome, and
I think that there's people who are more qualified or
more you know, gorgeous or skinnier or funnier or better
or smarter or whatever it is. Your little brain comes
in and I just tell my brain that for me,
that voice, you're allowed to sit in the car.
Speaker 3 (18:52):
You're not allowed to drive.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
I can hear you, and you're in the passenger seat,
and you're never going to go away because you're a
part of me, and my role here is to love
every part of me. I'm not going to throw you
out of the car, but I'm going to be like,
I get your.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
Opinion, I'm going to show you the other option.
Speaker 4 (19:08):
So I think hearing it and acting on it is
two different things. And I'm grateful that now I'm at
the place where my big girl pants drive the car.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
Most of the time.
Speaker 4 (19:23):
But of course that voice is there sometimes, and sometimes
I think just letting yourself have a really bad day
is also really important. You know, eat some yummy food,
sit in your bed, cancel some plans.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
It's like you're a.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Human and knowing it's a bad day, not a bad life,
but just it's going to happen.
Speaker 4 (19:41):
Yeah, and so I always say to myself, like, you
can take today or tonight, but then tomorrow you wake
up and you move forward.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
So you kind of allow you kind of give yourself
that permission to just dump to emotion, dump right absolutely.
Speaker 4 (19:57):
Absolutely, and have your things that you enjoy, like I
love reality TV shows and I love you know, pizza
or whatever it is.
Speaker 3 (20:05):
Whatever, you just need to nourish. The soul sometimes important.
Speaker 4 (20:09):
And I think to all this stuff we talk about
in wellness, I think it's important to see it as
a lifestyle and not as some eight week course or
one week push or summer's come and glow up thing.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
It's like, you're in this.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
The life has to be sustainable.
Speaker 3 (20:25):
It has to be sustainable.
Speaker 4 (20:26):
So if I do my meditation, you know, three times
a week, that's awesome because I'm doing that consistently.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
And it has to be something you look forward to
as well. A yes, yes, you don't want to look
at it as punishment.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
What about for you? Do you feel insecure and get down?
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Oh? I definitely do. I find like I get through waves.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
I'll have times where I'm like, ah, you know that
doesn't really impact me. But I've definitely throughout the years
when I was younger, I definitely compared myself to other people,
you know, in some of the positions, and then I'm
in the having quite perfony, going oh my god, why
why would I even compare myself because we are genuinely
(21:06):
such different people. Yes we may be in some of
the jobs, but all of us human beings are so unique.
And until you can actually fully embrace that and dive
into that and lean into it.
Speaker 1 (21:16):
You're just going to be a shit version, do you
know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (21:19):
You're never going to be the best version until you
completely embrace at all. So but I'm still learning, and
I still find that random things will trigger me and
I'll just be you know, thrown off course and I'll
be like, oh my god, am I doing I could
have been doing better if I did this or this,
and like, yeah, the inner dialogue loves to take over sometimes,
(21:42):
But I just love to pack other people's brains and
show that this is such like a human response, like
we do all go through these moments and we're not
We can't just be confident one hundred percent of the time.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
And I love how you admit that you don't make
it till you make it sometimes I take.
Speaker 3 (21:57):
It till I make it all the time. Success level.
Speaker 4 (22:02):
Yeah, you know, like Taylor I'm a big TAILOSWOFT fan
and Taylorsoft has a song.
Speaker 3 (22:08):
I can do it with a broken heart.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
Yes, yeah, you know.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
You know you're good when you can do it with
a broken heart.
Speaker 4 (22:14):
And I think for anyone who sees someone like yourself
or you know, someone who's kind of face forward in
their industry, a lot of the times you don't see
the broken heart because you see the light in the
eyes that you've worked so hard to also be able
to do at the same time. And that doesn't mean
that there isn't shadows behind the camera whatever's going out there.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
I listened to one of your podcast episodes talking about
how important it was to remember that you are the
main character in your life and you're not meant to
play the sidekick, and it's so easy to get like
caught up and that narrative of being in someone else's life.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
Well, other story. Do you want to talk through that
a little bit?
Speaker 4 (22:59):
Yeah, that was I love that you brought that up
because it's been a real struggle for me. I've really
really struggled with being in someone else's story, and it's
a pattern that I.
Speaker 3 (23:11):
Actually repeat to this very day.
Speaker 4 (23:14):
And I think I get it from my upbringing because
my dad was very successful as a musician.
Speaker 3 (23:19):
He still is, so.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
I kind of was always going along with my parents'
succeeds in their work. And I'm have an older brother,
but he's a lot older, so I kind of felt
like the little sidekick to them.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
They are great parents. It's not a bad thing, but
it's just.
Speaker 4 (23:34):
Interesting to analyze because I've often attracted these sort of
big friendships or big personalities, and I'm someone who loves
to help. I love to give advice, I love to love,
I love to care.
Speaker 3 (23:47):
I'm so hard on my sleeve, but.
Speaker 4 (23:52):
In to my detriment occasionally and to my detriment where
I wouldn't take the space to go, huh, is this
what I want? Is this the food I want to eat?
And is this where I want to be? Is? Do
I still want to stay out this late? Do I
want to drink alcohol? Do I want to behave like this?
Am I gossiping and bitching because I think it's cool
(24:14):
to this person? Or There were so many tiny ways
it started to show up, And then I noticed that
when I pulled back and stood in my power that
some of those quite captivating, big personality people lost.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
Interest in me.
Speaker 4 (24:29):
Wow, I wasn't simply fanning their fire. And that's okay,
that's divine. I think everyone comes into our life to
teach us something. So all love to anyone who but yeah,
it's been a real thing for me.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
Of I'm allowed to come.
Speaker 4 (24:47):
First, and anyone out there who struggles with it, what
I work on.
Speaker 3 (24:53):
This is like my little tip for.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
It is any tiny way that you can practice using
your voice, even if you people please and then you
leave and you come back and you're like.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
No, this is sorry problem.
Speaker 4 (25:10):
I'm recommunicating even if it's like that, and it will
be messy and it will be clunky, but do it.
So if you're at the cafe and they give you
the wrong milk, say something with kindness. Let's say something.
If the food's not right, say something right. If you
don't want to go to that party, don't just say yes,
(25:30):
negotiate compromise. Hey, I'm not wanting to be out right now.
Can I take you for a walk and a coffee
the next morning? So not so much seeing it as
black and white, but seeing it as I can negotiate
for something that also works for me. So that's yeah,
it's been a big journey. But that's my little tip
right now is honoring your voice.
Speaker 2 (25:52):
That's why do I know so many people pleasers. I
feel like I know so many reformed, reformed people plasers
that are like on the road to being way more assertive.
But why is it so ingrained? Is it particularly a
woman thing?
Speaker 3 (26:09):
I think it's quite kiwi.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Yeah, maybe it is a kiwi thing.
Speaker 4 (26:12):
I think it is quite like even my time in Australia,
I find them a lot more assertive.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
Yeah, And maybe that's what helped me because I did
live in Australia for a few years and I look
back at the things that I used to accept and
again it's still an ongoing journey. But like you would
feel so uncomfortable, you know, standing up or voicing where
you're coming from, and you'd almost have to apologize for
(26:39):
every little thing that you wanted to say. And it's
like no, no, hag about No, there is nothing wrong
with just affirming your boundaries or stating your opinion or
your perspective or why you feel good. But like it's
still so much easier said than done.
Speaker 4 (26:57):
It's very hard, and it's hard because it means that
you have.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
To respect yourself and your life.
Speaker 4 (27:05):
You have to say with true confidence, my story comes first.
And you know, and I think like for me in
the past, it was like, oh, this, this person's story
is cooler than mine. They've got cooler things going on,
They've got more success, they've got more money, more whatever
they have. Like, let's go with their idea and way
(27:25):
of being and getting swept.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Up in someone else and to find that personal.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
Like darma of no, like I'm allowed to take up
space too, we can do what I want to do.
Is super super challenging. It's super challenging. It's a journey
that I'm on.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Also, do you I know that you loved a butcher
a quote, but are there a number of quotes that
you do sometimes come back to in your life to
keep you on track?
Speaker 3 (27:55):
Yeah? I have. This is a quote by Louise Hay.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
Love her.
Speaker 4 (28:00):
Oh, if you haven't discovered Louise Hey, discover Louise Hay.
She's like the godmother of all the self help work
you've ever heard.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
She like Life Loves You is one of her books.
Speaker 3 (28:11):
Yeah, you can heal your life.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
That's it.
Speaker 4 (28:14):
You can heal your body anyway. She has an affirmation
and it is all as well in my.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
World simpole, simpole, I live by that.
Speaker 4 (28:28):
I live by another quote that's my own, which is
time to do the impossible. So when I'm faced with
something really crazy or really full on, I just say
time to do the impossible, and that really helps me.
Speaker 3 (28:41):
Yeah, those are my two little gems. Do you have
anything you live by?
Speaker 2 (28:45):
I see this is over. Not off the top of
my head, I've thrown you under the bus. No, I'm
sure I do. Did you assay saying did I read
something that you see more as more.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
More is more?
Speaker 3 (28:56):
That's another great one.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
So then I don't know if it would have flied.
I think I get overwhelmed. How do how does how
do you translate that to you?
Speaker 4 (29:06):
I love everything like I'm just like I want the
bright color, the sparkly outfit.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
I want to be half naked wearing mesh. I want
like the.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
Most outrageous birthday cake, Like give me all of it,
you know what I mean? Like I just I love
it like I love and tense people. I love people
who love life. I love loud people. I love being funny.
I love doing new things and going on adventures and
just biting off more than I can chew.
Speaker 3 (29:39):
And that's kind of who I am.
Speaker 4 (29:41):
So for me, more is more is just like I think,
especially for women and New Zealanders as well.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
You know, a little tall Bobby syndrome is real.
Speaker 4 (29:53):
I don't even say it, but I think a lot
of people sort of like to bring into the background
or or they're scared to be too much. And I
love being too much. I think being too much is
the best thing in the world. And anyone who thinks
they're too much, come and hang out with me. We
can start a crew. And how much more applies to
(30:16):
my life?
Speaker 1 (30:17):
What does success mean to you? How would you define success?
Speaker 3 (30:22):
Learning? Applied learning?
Speaker 4 (30:24):
So if I'm going into a situation similar to what
I've been into the past, but I'm handling it differently,
Like maybe one of those tough conversations we were talking about,
maybe you know you mentioned sometimes you get triggered. The
best feeling for me is when I noticed somewhere I
would have gotten triggered and I didn't. So those moments
(30:46):
where you feel your reaction shift and you're turning up
differently you're applying yourself differently. That to me is success.
It's evolution. I really believe that we're here to evolve
as people, as humankind, as your individual soul and self.
(31:07):
And any way, even if the plan and the route
that I've been thrown is not what I would have
ever wished for myself, if I've found a deeper connection
to me and an invitation to love myself further, and
I've taken it, and I can feel that that.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
Success, I love that is. That is some seriously profound
words there. I love that, guess And if you were
will wrap this up soon. But if you were to
give eighteen year old Casts some advice, knowing everything that
she's about to go through, I'm really throwing you under
(31:45):
the bus here with like quotes and advice.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
But what would you say, eighteen year old Cares?
Speaker 4 (31:51):
What would I say to eighteen year old Cares? I
think I would say do everything, and more like, don't
hold back, go as deep into it as you can.
So if you're heartbroken, be really heartbroken, because one day
you're going to have the love of your life.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
If you're poor, be really poor.
Speaker 4 (32:14):
One day you won't be say yes to every trip
every festival, drink every drink, try everything, Take every experience
you can, because looking back on it, every experience I
had was the best thing that ever happened to me.
So I would tell her to press on the accelerator
(32:34):
and to stop worrying so much about being perfect, because
I think when I was eighteen, I was really, really,
really worried about being perfect, and I would have preferred
to be a certain weight on the scale then, and
that would have sat in my head at events, at
dates and at university. I would have hid so much
(32:56):
about the scale and what it had said that morning.
And that is not a measure of who you are,
who your soul is, what you're capable of, how loving
you are, your energy, how beautiful you are.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
It's nothing. It's literally actually nothing.
Speaker 4 (33:11):
And so take the experiences that mean something and take
them seriously and get out of your own way.
Speaker 2 (33:19):
I guess it's crazy when you do kind of have
that epiphany of how much time you've wasted worrying about
things that I were really really skewed in your head
and we're not real.
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Like, for example, I look back, like you know.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
In Facebook, memories pop up on Facebook and it's like
ten years ago, and I just remember being so fixated
on big thighs, whatever it was. I look back and
I'm like, shit, I'd killed for that body, and you
just don't have appreciation in the moment. And I think
that is a real killer looking back at all the
time that you spent stupidly worrying and focusing on the
(34:03):
wrong things.
Speaker 3 (34:04):
Oh, it's just so. And you get a bit older
and you're just like what.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Yeah, and it Jess gets more and more. You get
older and older and you're like, hang on, like those
you're living in your prime.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (34:20):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (34:20):
And now worry is a personal jail cell yeap, yes,
bars imposed by you, and it's armor to the rest
of the world. And you're losing so much of your
freedom from your own mind. And that's why I'm really
passionate about what I do and that's why I have
my podcast and what I'm trying to get ahead for
people is like you can free yourself because it's so
(34:43):
it seems so silly, but I know how ingrained it
is to hold yourself back from like love or from
a beautiful life because you're like, well, I want to
be five kg's list.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
Yes, I am talking about like just doing it and
jumping in.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
I love the.
Speaker 2 (34:58):
Idea of just also failing spectacularly, Like we're so scared
of failure, right, but actually failure it should be a word,
because even if you do fail or how you perceive
to fail, you're learning something along the way, and that's
that's leading you to something else.
Speaker 4 (35:18):
And as long as you know that everything you're every
step you're taking, it's because you're interested in it.
Speaker 3 (35:25):
It doesn't matter how it lands.
Speaker 4 (35:27):
You know, sometimes something might land and you're like, awesome,
everyone loved it.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
And then sometimes it doesn't land and you're like, that
was cool.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
We move on following the nudgers. I like the idea
of following the nudges. And again that's coming back to
like tuning into your gut and your intuition and stuff,
but really learning your in a navigation system and working
art we truly want to go next. And yeah, it
might not always work, but at least you're kind of
being true to yourself.
Speaker 4 (35:56):
Do you have like a great failure that taught you
and led you to where you are today, Like it
was part of the kind of puzzle and.
Speaker 2 (36:03):
It always makes sense down the track, Like at the
time you're like, this fucking sucks, but down the track
you're like, thank god that didn't work out.
Speaker 1 (36:12):
That was a blessing.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Well, cass Look, it has just made an absolute honor
having you on. Today's so nice to get to know
you a little better. And I'm sure that you're staying
busy writing more. So hopefully watch this space and more
to come from cas Grod so much more.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 4 (36:30):
It's been your like the best energy, so much fun
and so great.
Speaker 3 (36:35):
So it's I'm so excited to be on your podcast.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
Thank you so much, Cares. That was my chat with
Cassandra Grog. I say, Cassandra, I called a cass through
the whole chat.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
Let's just say with cass And as I said.
Speaker 2 (36:53):
Going into the chat, I just love her enthusiastic energy,
I love her commitment to herself and people may have
felt overwhelmed listening to her daily routine.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
It's not that you have to go and do that.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
But what I like about what she said is that
it's showcased their true dedication to yourself, and that looks
so different for everyone. And if you are, you know,
a time poor parent and you really struggle to get
those things, and in the day work out, you know,
prioritize what it is that you need and then make
sure that you sched your time for that.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
I say this, do I do it a lot of
the time.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
No, But I'm telling you this, so then I remind
myself to do it. I love the chat around being
the main character in the story, bringing back that main
character energy and not just being a pushover and kind
of going into that autopilot mode where you start doing
things because others around you are doing it, and then
(37:50):
you realize, actually, this is just betraying myself. I actually
don't want to do this isn't the life I want
to live. So stepping back being really conscious on what
it is the life that you want to have for yourself.
And then I loved also the check in, the checking in.
Speaker 1 (38:08):
After certain events, whether it is doing a task for
work or catching up with a.
Speaker 2 (38:13):
Certain friend, spending time with colleagues, checking in after each event,
working out hard did that make you feel and going
into the body, because the body talks and we always
forget that. And I know it may sound where we're
going into the resounding yes of the body when you
feel that, but I think the more in tune we get,
the more clear those messages become. So they were my
(38:36):
main takeaways from CASS this week. A real refreshing episode
and I hope you got something out of it. I
will be back next Sunday with another episode of Slow
It Down.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
Thank you so much for joining me.
With the Heads Podcast Network.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Hi, welcome back to another episode of Slow It Down.
I am your host, PJ Harding, and I am loving
hearing your feedback on all of the episodes that we've
released so far.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Don't be shy to get in touch.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Let me know what's resonating, what's not resonating, what you
want to hear more of this podcast.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Obviously, I am on a journey.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
To work out how people find peace and the chaos.
It's not about getting rid of the chaos, but it's
about working out what rituals and practices people do to
stay sane in this crazy world, and it is certainly
extra crazy at the moment. This week, I am joined
by an incredible woman who's all but I first came
(00:54):
into contact with I can't remember if it was the
end of last year or the beginning of this year.
And when I saw her, I thought, she is captivating.
She has a real enthusiasm for life, an infectious energy.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
And she knows what she wants.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
And I thought, that's what we need on the podcast
this week, a bit of uplifting talk.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
So I wanted to get.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
Inside the brain of Cassandra Grodd. She is an author, podcaster,
and content creator, and in this episode we talk about confidence.
Has she always been as confident as she appears online?
The answer is no, and the process that she's gone
on is really interesting and that journey that she has
(01:40):
taken to feel really comfortable in her own skin, So
we dive into that in so much more. I hope
you get a lot out of this chat, like I
did my conversation with Cassandra Grod. I do just want
to do a trigger warning before we get into the podcast,
(02:00):
as there is content that is sensitive in nature as
we discuss topics such as eating disorders. So I would
encourage you to take a break during the episode if
it all becomes too much, or make an informed decision
that this content isn't right for you.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Okays, welcome to slow it down.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
Thank you so much and honored to be here.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
I first came across you when we were on a
bit of a conference with Hannah Krera and it was
like this beautiful weekend session and that's when I first
got to hear you. And I must say, you have
very beautiful, infectious energy that you kind of.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Just want more of. I think you've got such a
zest for life.
Speaker 4 (02:41):
Ah, what a compliment, I would say the exact same.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Thing to you, because I know that it's possibly not
always been like that, and I feel like you have
been on a real journey of coming to love yourself.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Is that right correct?
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Absolutely?
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Because you've got two books out called Bully and Karling,
and can you run through just quickly the premise of
those two books and how you ended up freaking writing
books in the first place.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
Absolutely.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
So. I struggled really intimately with an eating disorder through
my teenage years. So I had bulimia from I remember
having balimic tendencies from when I was quite tiny, and
I dissected all about where that came from and a
lot of therapy, but it was something that I just
lived with and it was this incredible secret and it
(03:30):
held hands with anxiety disorder, which I was medicated for
at one point, body dysmorphia, everything under that category, and
writing and creativity for me was an outlet and it
was something that just happened really, really naturally. And at
the same time, I joined social media right when it
(03:51):
was booming, and I remember when it first came out
and I was seventeen, and we posted photos of like
tank and sushi and like how weird friends in high
school were filtered, and I coincided with the platform that
is Instagram, and I just naturally was someone who sort
of gained attention.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
And when I.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
First joined social media, I was in a very very
dark place in terms of how I saw myself and
how I perceived myself, and I was presenting myself as
something I wasn't in a way. And one day I
shared a piece of writing and I was living in
the UK at the time, and I remember I went
to the bathroom and I came back and I had
(04:32):
fifty d ms PJ Wow, And I was like, shut
the front door. I'm Kylie Jenner. Everybody can leave.
Speaker 3 (04:40):
This is the most success any human has ever experienced.
Speaker 4 (04:44):
And there was this massive encouragement for me to keep going,
and I just started sharing writing my platform built. People
were like, give us a book. And I had no
idea what the frick I was doing. I just the
whole thing was me and free answers that I hired
off Fiber and great friends of mine.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
And put the book out Lightning Head Earth, and it
did exceptionally well.
Speaker 4 (05:08):
It was third on the Amazon best sellers and remained
up there. It stayed on the charts for quite a
while and I went on to do my second one.
So to answer your question, I think writing was the
a sort of a pinnacle point of an incredible journey
i'd have I'd had with discovering myself through this eating disorder,
(05:31):
and that's what the books are about, essentially.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
And so you were talking about how like the life
that you were projecting online differed from how you were feeling.
What was the process of aligning your true self with
what you were projecting out there.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
It's funny because when.
Speaker 4 (05:49):
I say that it could be taken in a negative context,
it actually worked really positively for me because it was
this breath of air where I would post online as
the super confident girl, and I think somewhere along the
way my brain started to go, oh, wait, we actually
can be that person. So it was potentially a little
(06:11):
bit of a fake it till you make it, and
it was also a moment of showing myself what's possible.
Social media gets a really bad, bad stick of it,
but it actually worked quite harmoniously for me as long
as I was doing the inner work at the same time.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
And I think doing the inner.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Work working through the trauma, working through the things in
my childhood, working through the shadow, finding this radical acceptance
of myself and my body and forgiving myself. That's when
the presentation and the image and what I actually believed
to be true lined up.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
And it didn't.
Speaker 4 (06:48):
It wasn't overnight like it was. I'm about to be
twenty eight, so I've been on this platform posting photos
of myself for a wee while.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Yeah, that's so interesting that you actually found it worked
and your favorite and it was almost like, I guess,
not like a mood board, but you'd be kind of
trying to curate how you wanted to feel. And as
long as you were doing that kind of internal work,
then you really felt like you eventually kind of got
(07:16):
there And did that take a lot of I don't know, obviously,
this is because I know you're a bit of a
gym when it comes to manifestation. Is that when you
really started getting that into gear as well?
Speaker 3 (07:28):
Absolutely, well, I'll butcher this.
Speaker 4 (07:30):
I don't know the exact you know, someone listening out
there will give me a lot of shit for this.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
I butcher all my quotes.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
If you're about to butcher right, I really appreciate it.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Wasn't there.
Speaker 4 (07:40):
I know, right, like I say things on mine and
I'm like right. So there was a study done, I
believe it was by Harvard, and they measured the strongest
emotion that can be admitted from the human body. And
how they measured this, dear God, don't ask me, but
they did. And the strongest emotion or state of being
(08:02):
that a human could be in was authenticity.
Speaker 3 (08:06):
So it was on the scale. Authenticity was right up.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
And then it was forgiveness I believe in, then gratitude
And when we think of that word you through out there,
that's manifestation.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
It's very commercial.
Speaker 4 (08:18):
Now, what manifestation means is that you are as close
to living your authentic life as possible.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
So if you've got your.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Ship pointed in your true direction and you're not pretending,
and it takes going through the layers of where am
I not being myself right? Where am I performing? Where
am I pushing? Where am I moving something uphill? Where
am I people pleasing? Where am I saying yes when
I should be saying no? And it's manifestation is actually
(08:50):
just about lifting your self respect. So for something like
healing and eating disorder, which is quite a disrespectful behavior
to do to yourself. Naturally, in that process, I found
my way to manifestation.
Speaker 3 (09:05):
And so manifestation can be really.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
Spiritual and crystals and whatnot, but then it can also
be really tangible and just like when you treat yourself right,
the universe treats you right. That's what started to really
click and change for me, and it changed everything. It
changed how I look physically. That energy that you talk about,
that zest for life, that positivity that cut path full.
(09:31):
It all started with how I was treating myself. And
if I was going to binge and purge over a
toilet four days a week, that's not a very great
way that I can four days week, four times a day. Rather,
it's not a great way that I can tell myself
and any other aspect of my life that I come first.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
Wow, Authenticity is like obviously another word that's thrown around
a lot, but it's probably something that a lot of
people really really struggle to be truly authentic, whether it's
being in a job that they.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
Just aren't quite aligned with.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
A relationship, living where they're not quite you know, content with.
So you were saying, like going through all the things
that you know you're not.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Oh, I can't remember how you exactly worded.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
It, but the way you're pretending.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Yeah, So would you like, do you have a tangible
way that people listening right now can kind of do
a checklist in their brain if they're being authentic, because
sometimes it is. It's one of those things that's really
hard to measure.
Speaker 4 (10:36):
I would say that the first thing you need to
do is you need to listen to your body. So
you need to take the space, whether that's five minutes
in the morning, five minutes at night, whether you're at
that job that you hate that you don't really need
cash to give you a checklist because you know you.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
Fricking hate it there.
Speaker 4 (10:57):
And I like to put my hands on my womb
or like lower stomach if you hate that word everyone
hates sorry wom.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
Hey, Wom's beautiful. Something quite confronting about the word worm.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
Yeah, but it's so beautiful.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
But like, yeah, yeah, it's like kind of near moist,
it is. I'm with you, but you can, you know,
you put your hands on your womb and take a
deep breath and really notice where your breath is heading,
how deep it's going in. And I like to ask myself,
what do I need to know? And also you can
(11:35):
ask yourself what's true. So when you sit with your
body and it might tell you nothing, or it might
tell you everything. It might tell you so many things
that aren't true, you're a bit confronted.
Speaker 3 (11:45):
But you're going to.
Speaker 4 (11:46):
Start to feel tension towards what won't be right. And
I think you were talking earlier about this podcast being
about people who.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
Move very fast.
Speaker 4 (11:58):
And if you're moving fast and a big player, and
we will arm we have loads of things going on
in our life that five minutes every morning, every evening,
in the middle of your day, where you ask yourself,
have I been honest with myself?
Speaker 3 (12:14):
Or am I betraying myself right?
Speaker 4 (12:17):
And that sense of betrayal to the self will come
through very strongly in your body, and it's going to
give you quite a strong compass and my experience of
what's working and what's not. And beyond that, pay attention
to how you feel at the end of little things,
end of a meeting, end of a friend hangout, end
(12:37):
of a date. Do you leave and you feel like
high energy? Do you leave and you feel low energy?
And so getting out of our head and all this
like mental thinking and YadA YadA, and actually listening to
our feeling level of what feels good and what works
for us.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
That's my tangible tip.
Speaker 4 (12:56):
That's something that I practiced every single day for authenticity.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
I love that, and I because I've I have a
little bit of worm from time to time, and like
you often hear about like the full body yees, like
getting that full body yees, but that can take a
while again to really.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
Get in tune with yourself.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
And so it comes down to I supose that regular practice,
so you you really start to know what the signals
mean in your body when there is that insane resistance
right when it's like, nah, this isn't right, because your
body ultimately knows. It's a very great tip that I
think we can walk away with today. So thank you course.
(13:41):
So what about when kes is feeling really blur or
really yuck and she's in a bit of a rut.
How do you navigate through that and how do you
often reset?
Speaker 4 (13:54):
I have two answers for that. The first answer is
my practices. So I am very very grounded and loyal
to my practices. And when I start to feel off track,
I notice that I've slipped from the things that make
me feel great. So my morning routine is so sacred
(14:17):
to me. It is meticulous, it is perfected. It is
like I'm the most annoying person you'd ever mate, but
I'm on an empty stomach. People tell me, I saw
you walking and you were smiling, like you looked insane.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
You were smiling so much.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
And it's because I have this.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Walking meditation and sometimes I chant, and sometimes I put
my arms out and I say my affirmation and I
come back from this walk and I'm blowing and people
are sort of like, my alarm hasn't gone.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
Off, So so talk I throw your meticulous routine.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
I want to hear it.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
Okay, So it starts six a m.
Speaker 4 (14:53):
And I have a bone broth with so I'm not
sure if anyone knows much about bone broth. It's very
good for your collagen, YadA.
Speaker 3 (14:59):
YadA on drop and then I will have some supplements.
Speaker 4 (15:02):
So I take my Eve Wellness, blood, sugar Babe, and
vitamin C and.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
Then I go for my walk. My walk is forty five.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
Minutes, and I listen to a walking meditation of myself
or of doctor Joe Despenser.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Oh, he's the man.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
He's the man.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
I was listening to us audiover the other day, although
I was trying to drive long distances, and I must
say it was not the best thing to stay awake.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
In the car, but some of his serving voice knowledge.
I think meditation that I do it's unreal amazing.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
I love that everyone needs to do it. It's like
you go through who you used to be, who you.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
Want to be, and you actually like I like walking
through my meditation because I literally walk into the person
I'm trying to become.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
Come back. If it's a really good day, I'm going
to the gymeral plates.
Speaker 4 (15:49):
If it's not that type of day, I'm sitting and
doing twenty.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Minutes of breath work. I do Awaken breathwork. You have
incredible shout out Awaken, look as Mac hewe awesome guy.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
I'll journal anything that comes up. Then I'm having my breakfast,
which is high protein the rest of my supplements. I'm showering,
and then I go and I have my coffee after
I've eaten an hour and a half after I wake up.
Speaker 3 (16:13):
Everybody's super important changed my whole life.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
And wait, wait, you have the coffee an hour after you'veden.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
Yeah, no, sorry, an hour after I've waken up.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Oh okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 4 (16:23):
Food and tummy high proteins, and then I'll go and
I like to sit with my coffee and make it
a moment and really enjoy it and be slow with it.
And that's my slow little moment, and I go through
my day and my to do list, and that's how
I start my morning.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
I love.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
I mean, I have a toddler, so I can imagine
other parents out there right now, are like the sounds
like a dream routine, And yes, I can maybe doing
about of kids. So like, look, everyone has to kind
of work around the time that they've got. But I
love the dedication that you've got and you just know
that for you and when you don't do that, then
(17:02):
you start feeling out of alignment.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Right.
Speaker 3 (17:05):
Yeah, Well, my whole.
Speaker 4 (17:06):
Thing with it is is that that's my life changed
when I got a morning routine, because that's how I
tell the universe that I come first. So before I
go to that big meeting or before I'm doing things
for everyone else, I'm doing.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
Something for me.
Speaker 4 (17:21):
And I swear when I started admitting that into the world,
the whole world started to go, oh, okay, you come first.
Speaker 3 (17:28):
You're prioritizing yourself.
Speaker 4 (17:30):
So I'm sure everyone can't do the cast Rod two
hours all the morning routine, because sometimes Cas Grod can't
do that. Even if it's like the five minute chicken
with your body, have it stacked, do that in the shower.
You can take a couple of supplements for yourself. You
can have a nourishing breakfast whilst you're making your families.
(17:51):
Incorporate it in a way that works for you.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
You know.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
I love that. Do you even feel self doubt or
and secure?
Speaker 3 (18:00):
Yeah, one hundred percent so you of course yes.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Taught me through it.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Taught me through what happens when you when you feel
all of that, well, it.
Speaker 3 (18:08):
Normally comes for me.
Speaker 4 (18:10):
I wonder if you relate to this after I've put
something out so I don't really doubt myself free launching it.
I have this very bizarre confidence that I get from
my dad, who's super German. He thinks everything he does
is great, and like, I'm just like this is awesome, Like, guys,
look at this photo.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
I look amazing. Wow. And then I put it out
there and I'm like I hate everything about this.
Speaker 4 (18:31):
Yeah, or I sometimes will just have imposter syndrome, and
I think that there's people who are more qualified or
more you know, gorgeous or skinnier or funnier or better
or smarter or whatever it is. Your little brain comes
in and I just tell my brain that for me,
that voice, you're allowed to sit in the car.
Speaker 3 (18:52):
You're not allowed to drive.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
I can hear you, and you're in the passenger seat,
and you're never going to go away because you're a
part of me, and my role here is to love
every part of me. I'm not going to throw you
out of the car, but I'm going to be like,
I get your.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
Opinion, I'm going to show you the other option.
Speaker 4 (19:08):
So I think hearing it and acting on it is
two different things. And I'm grateful that now I'm at
the place where my big girl pants drive the car.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
Most of the time.
Speaker 4 (19:23):
But of course that voice is there sometimes, and sometimes
I think just letting yourself have a really bad day
is also really important. You know, eat some yummy food,
sit in your bed, cancel some plans.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
It's like you're a.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Human and knowing it's a bad day, not a bad life,
but just it's going to happen.
Speaker 4 (19:41):
Yeah, and so I always say to myself, like, you
can take today or tonight, but then tomorrow you wake
up and you move forward.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
So you kind of allow you kind of give yourself
that permission to just dump to emotion, dump right absolutely.
Speaker 4 (19:57):
Absolutely, and have your things that you enjoy, like I
love reality TV shows and I love you know, pizza
or whatever it is.
Speaker 3 (20:05):
Whatever, you just need to nourish. The soul sometimes important.
Speaker 4 (20:09):
And I think to all this stuff we talk about
in wellness, I think it's important to see it as
a lifestyle and not as some eight week course or
one week push or summer's come and glow up thing.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
It's like, you're in this.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
The life has to be sustainable.
Speaker 3 (20:25):
It has to be sustainable.
Speaker 4 (20:26):
So if I do my meditation, you know, three times
a week, that's awesome because I'm doing that consistently.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
And it has to be something you look forward to
as well. A yes, yes, you don't want to look
at it as punishment.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
What about for you? Do you feel insecure and get down?
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Oh? I definitely do. I find like I get through waves.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
I'll have times where I'm like, ah, you know that
doesn't really impact me. But I've definitely throughout the years
when I was younger, I definitely compared myself to other people,
you know, in some of the positions, and then I'm
in the having quite perfony, going oh my god, why
why would I even compare myself because we are genuinely
(21:06):
such different people. Yes we may be in some of
the jobs, but all of us human beings are so unique.
And until you can actually fully embrace that and dive
into that and lean into it.
Speaker 1 (21:16):
You're just going to be a shit version, do you
know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (21:19):
You're never going to be the best version until you
completely embrace at all. So but I'm still learning, and
I still find that random things will trigger me and
I'll just be you know, thrown off course and I'll
be like, oh my god, am I doing I could
have been doing better if I did this or this,
and like, yeah, the inner dialogue loves to take over sometimes,
(21:42):
But I just love to pack other people's brains and
show that this is such like a human response, like
we do all go through these moments and we're not
We can't just be confident one hundred percent of the time.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
And I love how you admit that you don't make
it till you make it sometimes I take.
Speaker 3 (21:57):
It till I make it all the time. Success level.
Speaker 4 (22:02):
Yeah, you know, like Taylor I'm a big TAILOSWOFT fan
and Taylorsoft has a song.
Speaker 3 (22:08):
I can do it with a broken heart.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
Yes, yeah, you know.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
You know you're good when you can do it with
a broken heart.
Speaker 4 (22:14):
And I think for anyone who sees someone like yourself
or you know, someone who's kind of face forward in
their industry, a lot of the times you don't see
the broken heart because you see the light in the
eyes that you've worked so hard to also be able
to do at the same time. And that doesn't mean
that there isn't shadows behind the camera whatever's going out there.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
I listened to one of your podcast episodes talking about
how important it was to remember that you are the
main character in your life and you're not meant to
play the sidekick, and it's so easy to get like
caught up and that narrative of being in someone else's life.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
Well, other story. Do you want to talk through that
a little bit?
Speaker 4 (22:59):
Yeah, that was I love that you brought that up
because it's been a real struggle for me. I've really
really struggled with being in someone else's story, and it's
a pattern that I.
Speaker 3 (23:11):
Actually repeat to this very day.
Speaker 4 (23:14):
And I think I get it from my upbringing because
my dad was very successful as a musician.
Speaker 3 (23:19):
He still is, so.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
I kind of was always going along with my parents'
succeeds in their work. And I'm have an older brother,
but he's a lot older, so I kind of felt
like the little sidekick to them.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
They are great parents. It's not a bad thing, but
it's just.
Speaker 4 (23:34):
Interesting to analyze because I've often attracted these sort of
big friendships or big personalities, and I'm someone who loves
to help. I love to give advice, I love to love,
I love to care.
Speaker 3 (23:47):
I'm so hard on my sleeve, but.
Speaker 4 (23:52):
In to my detriment occasionally and to my detriment where
I wouldn't take the space to go, huh, is this
what I want? Is this the food I want to eat?
And is this where I want to be? Is? Do
I still want to stay out this late? Do I
want to drink alcohol? Do I want to behave like this?
Am I gossiping and bitching because I think it's cool
(24:14):
to this person? Or There were so many tiny ways
it started to show up, And then I noticed that
when I pulled back and stood in my power that
some of those quite captivating, big personality people lost.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
Interest in me.
Speaker 4 (24:29):
Wow, I wasn't simply fanning their fire. And that's okay,
that's divine. I think everyone comes into our life to
teach us something. So all love to anyone who but yeah,
it's been a real thing for me.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
Of I'm allowed to come.
Speaker 4 (24:47):
First, and anyone out there who struggles with it, what
I work on.
Speaker 3 (24:53):
This is like my little tip for.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
It is any tiny way that you can practice using
your voice, even if you people please and then you
leave and you come back and you're like.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
No, this is sorry problem.
Speaker 4 (25:10):
I'm recommunicating even if it's like that, and it will
be messy and it will be clunky, but do it.
So if you're at the cafe and they give you
the wrong milk, say something with kindness. Let's say something.
If the food's not right, say something right. If you
don't want to go to that party, don't just say yes,
(25:30):
negotiate compromise. Hey, I'm not wanting to be out right now.
Can I take you for a walk and a coffee
the next morning? So not so much seeing it as
black and white, but seeing it as I can negotiate
for something that also works for me. So that's yeah,
it's been a big journey. But that's my little tip
right now is honoring your voice.
Speaker 2 (25:52):
That's why do I know so many people pleasers. I
feel like I know so many reformed, reformed people plasers
that are like on the road to being way more assertive.
But why is it so ingrained? Is it particularly a
woman thing?
Speaker 3 (26:09):
I think it's quite kiwi.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Yeah, maybe it is a kiwi thing.
Speaker 4 (26:12):
I think it is quite like even my time in Australia,
I find them a lot more assertive.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
Yeah, And maybe that's what helped me because I did
live in Australia for a few years and I look
back at the things that I used to accept and
again it's still an ongoing journey. But like you would
feel so uncomfortable, you know, standing up or voicing where
you're coming from, and you'd almost have to apologize for
(26:39):
every little thing that you wanted to say. And it's
like no, no, hag about No, there is nothing wrong
with just affirming your boundaries or stating your opinion or
your perspective or why you feel good. But like it's
still so much easier said than done.
Speaker 4 (26:57):
It's very hard, and it's hard because it means that
you have.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
To respect yourself and your life.
Speaker 4 (27:05):
You have to say with true confidence, my story comes first.
And you know, and I think like for me in
the past, it was like, oh, this, this person's story
is cooler than mine. They've got cooler things going on,
They've got more success, they've got more money, more whatever
they have. Like, let's go with their idea and way
(27:25):
of being and getting swept.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Up in someone else and to find that personal.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
Like darma of no, like I'm allowed to take up
space too, we can do what I want to do.
Is super super challenging. It's super challenging. It's a journey
that I'm on.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
Also, do you I know that you loved a butcher
a quote, but are there a number of quotes that
you do sometimes come back to in your life to
keep you on track?
Speaker 3 (27:55):
Yeah? I have. This is a quote by Louise Hay.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
Love her.
Speaker 4 (28:00):
Oh, if you haven't discovered Louise Hey, discover Louise Hay.
She's like the godmother of all the self help work
you've ever heard.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
She like Life Loves You is one of her books.
Speaker 3 (28:11):
Yeah, you can heal your life.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
That's it.
Speaker 4 (28:14):
You can heal your body anyway. She has an affirmation
and it is all as well in my.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
World simpole, simpole, I live by that.
Speaker 4 (28:28):
I live by another quote that's my own, which is
time to do the impossible. So when I'm faced with
something really crazy or really full on, I just say
time to do the impossible, and that really helps me.
Speaker 3 (28:41):
Yeah, those are my two little gems. Do you have
anything you live by?
Speaker 2 (28:45):
I see this is over. Not off the top of
my head, I've thrown you under the bus. No, I'm
sure I do. Did you assay saying did I read
something that you see more as more.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
More is more?
Speaker 3 (28:56):
That's another great one.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
So then I don't know if it would have flied.
I think I get overwhelmed. How do how does how
do you translate that to you?
Speaker 4 (29:06):
I love everything like I'm just like I want the
bright color, the sparkly outfit.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
I want to be half naked wearing mesh. I want
like the.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
Most outrageous birthday cake, Like give me all of it,
you know what I mean? Like I just I love
it like I love and tense people. I love people
who love life. I love loud people. I love being funny.
I love doing new things and going on adventures and
just biting off more than I can chew.
Speaker 3 (29:39):
And that's kind of who I am.
Speaker 4 (29:41):
So for me, more is more is just like I think,
especially for women and New Zealanders as well.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
You know, a little tall Bobby syndrome is real.
Speaker 4 (29:53):
I don't even say it, but I think a lot
of people sort of like to bring into the background
or or they're scared to be too much. And I
love being too much. I think being too much is
the best thing in the world. And anyone who thinks
they're too much, come and hang out with me. We
can start a crew. And how much more applies to
(30:16):
my life?
Speaker 1 (30:17):
What does success mean to you? How would you define success?
Speaker 3 (30:22):
Learning? Applied learning?
Speaker 4 (30:24):
So if I'm going into a situation similar to what
I've been into the past, but I'm handling it differently,
Like maybe one of those tough conversations we were talking about,
maybe you know you mentioned sometimes you get triggered. The
best feeling for me is when I noticed somewhere I
would have gotten triggered and I didn't. So those moments
(30:46):
where you feel your reaction shift and you're turning up
differently you're applying yourself differently. That to me is success.
It's evolution. I really believe that we're here to evolve
as people, as humankind, as your individual soul and self.
(31:07):
And any way, even if the plan and the route
that I've been thrown is not what I would have
ever wished for myself, if I've found a deeper connection
to me and an invitation to love myself further, and
I've taken it, and I can feel that that.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
Success, I love that is. That is some seriously profound
words there. I love that, guess And if you were
will wrap this up soon. But if you were to
give eighteen year old Casts some advice, knowing everything that
she's about to go through, I'm really throwing you under
(31:45):
the bus here with like quotes and advice.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
But what would you say, eighteen year old Cares?
Speaker 4 (31:51):
What would I say to eighteen year old Cares? I
think I would say do everything, and more like, don't
hold back, go as deep into it as you can.
So if you're heartbroken, be really heartbroken, because one day
you're going to have the love of your life.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
If you're poor, be really poor.
Speaker 4 (32:14):
One day you won't be say yes to every trip
every festival, drink every drink, try everything, Take every experience
you can, because looking back on it, every experience I
had was the best thing that ever happened to me.
So I would tell her to press on the accelerator
(32:34):
and to stop worrying so much about being perfect, because
I think when I was eighteen, I was really, really,
really worried about being perfect, and I would have preferred
to be a certain weight on the scale then, and
that would have sat in my head at events, at
dates and at university. I would have hid so much
(32:56):
about the scale and what it had said that morning.
And that is not a measure of who you are,
who your soul is, what you're capable of, how loving
you are, your energy, how beautiful you are.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
It's nothing. It's literally actually nothing.
Speaker 4 (33:11):
And so take the experiences that mean something and take
them seriously and get out of your own way.
Speaker 2 (33:19):
I guess it's crazy when you do kind of have
that epiphany of how much time you've wasted worrying about
things that I were really really skewed in your head
and we're not real.
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Like, for example, I look back, like you know.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
In Facebook, memories pop up on Facebook and it's like
ten years ago, and I just remember being so fixated
on big thighs, whatever it was. I look back and
I'm like, shit, I'd killed for that body, and you
just don't have appreciation in the moment. And I think
that is a real killer looking back at all the
time that you spent stupidly worrying and focusing on the
(34:03):
wrong things.
Speaker 3 (34:04):
Oh, it's just so. And you get a bit older
and you're just like what.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Yeah, and it Jess gets more and more. You get
older and older and you're like, hang on, like those
you're living in your prime.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (34:20):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (34:20):
And now worry is a personal jail cell yeap, yes,
bars imposed by you, and it's armor to the rest
of the world. And you're losing so much of your
freedom from your own mind. And that's why I'm really
passionate about what I do and that's why I have
my podcast and what I'm trying to get ahead for
people is like you can free yourself because it's so
(34:43):
it seems so silly, but I know how ingrained it
is to hold yourself back from like love or from
a beautiful life because you're like, well, I want to
be five kg's list.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
Yes, I am talking about like just doing it and
jumping in.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
I love the.
Speaker 2 (34:58):
Idea of just also failing spectacularly, Like we're so scared
of failure, right, but actually failure it should be a word,
because even if you do fail or how you perceive
to fail, you're learning something along the way, and that's
that's leading you to something else.
Speaker 4 (35:18):
And as long as you know that everything you're every
step you're taking, it's because you're interested in it.
Speaker 3 (35:25):
It doesn't matter how it lands.
Speaker 4 (35:27):
You know, sometimes something might land and you're like, awesome,
everyone loved it.
Speaker 3 (35:31):
And then sometimes it doesn't land and you're like, that
was cool.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
We move on following the nudgers. I like the idea
of following the nudges. And again that's coming back to
like tuning into your gut and your intuition and stuff,
but really learning your in a navigation system and working
art we truly want to go next. And yeah, it
might not always work, but at least you're kind of
being true to yourself.
Speaker 4 (35:56):
Do you have like a great failure that taught you
and led you to where you are today, Like it
was part of the kind of puzzle and.
Speaker 2 (36:03):
It always makes sense down the track, Like at the
time you're like, this fucking sucks, but down the track
you're like, thank god that didn't work out.
Speaker 1 (36:12):
That was a blessing.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Well, cass Look, it has just made an absolute honor
having you on. Today's so nice to get to know
you a little better. And I'm sure that you're staying
busy writing more. So hopefully watch this space and more
to come from cas Grod so much more.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 4 (36:30):
It's been your like the best energy, so much fun
and so great.
Speaker 3 (36:35):
So it's I'm so excited to be on your podcast.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
Thank you so much, Cares. That was my chat with
Cassandra Grog. I say, Cassandra, I called a cass through
the whole chat.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
Let's just say with cass And as I said.
Speaker 2 (36:53):
Going into the chat, I just love her enthusiastic energy,
I love her commitment to herself and people may have
felt overwhelmed listening to her daily routine.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
It's not that you have to go and do that.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
But what I like about what she said is that
it's showcased their true dedication to yourself, and that looks
so different for everyone. And if you are, you know,
a time poor parent and you really struggle to get
those things, and in the day work out, you know,
prioritize what it is that you need and then make
sure that you sched your time for that.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
I say this, do I do it a lot of
the time.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
No, But I'm telling you this, so then I remind
myself to do it. I love the chat around being
the main character in the story, bringing back that main
character energy and not just being a pushover and kind
of going into that autopilot mode where you start doing
things because others around you are doing it, and then
(37:50):
you realize, actually, this is just betraying myself. I actually
don't want to do this isn't the life I want
to live. So stepping back being really conscious on what
it is the life that you want to have for yourself.
And then I loved also the check in, the checking in.
Speaker 1 (38:08):
After certain events, whether it is doing a task for
work or catching up with a.
Speaker 2 (38:13):
Certain friend, spending time with colleagues, checking in after each event,
working out hard did that make you feel and going
into the body, because the body talks and we always
forget that. And I know it may sound where we're
going into the resounding yes of the body when you
feel that, but I think the more in tune we get,
the more clear those messages become. So they were my
(38:36):
main takeaways from CASS this week. A real refreshing episode
and I hope you got something out of it. I
will be back next Sunday with another episode of Slow
It Down.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
Thank you so much for joining me.
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