March 14, 2025 • 48 mins
233. what happens when you mix a lawyer, an artist, an event planner, a product-based business owner and a running coach?
you get me!
i'm a life and career coach with a fun and diverse toolkit for helping clients transform their lives.
in this personal episode, i share my multifaceted journey from uncertain college graduate to confident coach.
i share insight and funny stories from running track at UNC and studying journalism, to attending law school while having my first child, to launching multiple businesses including a craft company, running camps, and a stationery brand.
each of those experiences taught me important things that now serve my coaching practice.
law school showed me how to quickly spot the issue so we know what to work on.
art licensing and my stationery company taught me how to handle rejection and keep going (97% of my pitches resulted in a "no").
running camps and teaching fitness classes taught me how to listen, observe and find wins for each person to celebrate.
event planning taught me how to manage chaos and stay organized and focused.
i used to hesitate to set a goal because i thought it might be a waste of time and energy to pursue it, only to change my mind once i got there.
as you'll discover as you walk through my journey with me, nothing is wasted.
each of your experiences contributes to who you are becoming. if you're multi-passionate and afraid to commit to a direction, choose something today and start. you'll never discover what works for you until you're taking action.
text me with comments on this episode!
i can help you feel better and get more done in 6 months. i'll help you figure out a meaningful goal, we'll create an action plan and i'll help you get unstuck all along the way. you don't have to struggle getting things done.
if you loved what i talked about in this episode, you're going to love working with me.
want to see if we are a good fit for 1:1 coaching? go to https://showupsociety.com/coaching and schedule a consult.
not quite ready for 1:1 coaching, but want powerful, evidence-based mindset tips and practical strategies? sign up for the SHOW UP daily - think of it as daily coaching in your pocket. sign up here--> https://showupsociety.thrivecart.com/show-up-daily/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
You are listening to the Show Up Society podcast.
If you want to feel betterabout the way you show up in the
world, you're in the exactright place.
I'm your host, certified lifecoach, tammy Bennett, and I'm
here to help you stop giving apoop about what others think so
you can make confident decisions.
Your whole outlook on goalswill change too.
You'll see.
They can be fun, doable andfull of celebration, not
(00:24):
something to be afraid offailing.
And speaking of fears, I'llhelp you work through all of
yours so you can take moreaction.
You're already a badass in mybook, and if you want to learn
how to create the life you want,then get your buns in here and
let's go.
Hey friend, welcome to episode233 of the Show Up Society
(00:44):
podcast, today's episode.
I'm going to be talking a littlebit about my origin story and
how I got started coaching.
A couple months ago, I asked onInstagram what people would
like to hear on the podcast andI had a couple people say that
they wanted to know more aboutmy journey and what I did before
coaching and how I became acoach and that kind of thing.
So I felt like today would be afun day to do that I was
(01:08):
thinking back to a recentepisode where I talked about how
people don't know who we areand what we have to offer in the
world unless we tell them, andso I wanted to take this episode
to talk about how I became acoach and then, probably next
episode, I'm going to talk alittle bit about what I do, like
what I actually do as a coachand what that looks like.
(01:30):
So this will be sort of thebackground, and I thought it
would be interesting too to sortof show how all the things that
I did prior to coaching haveled me to here and they've all
mattered and they've all beenreally important to my skills as
a coach.
And I think it's important forme to bring that up, because I
used to be really scared ofsetting goals because I had very
(01:53):
short attention span and Ithought, well, what if I spend
all this time and money andenergy working on this goal and
then I get there and I don'twant it, or I want to change my
mind, or I want to do adifferent thing, and I don't
want my time, energy and moneyto be wasted if I'm going to put
it all towards something andthen decide to do something else
, and so I used to be totallyafraid of making a choice and
(02:17):
taking action forward, because Iwas like, well, I don't know if
that's what I'm going to wantto do in two years or four years
, I don't know.
I don't want to waste time,money and energy.
And it just turned out that Iwas wasting time, money and
energy by just spinning mywheels, and so I just wanted you
to know that it's okay for youto choose a goal and to go after
it and then change your mind ata later date, because, I mean,
(02:37):
we're human, we have lots ofinterests, and a lot of people
in my audience have ADHD, andyou know, a lot of people in my
audience have ADHD, and a lot ofpeople in my audience are
creative and we want to do allthe things.
Everything is interesting to us, or at least a lot of things
are interesting to us, and wewant to kind of do them all.
And so this is my message toyou that whatever you do decide
to take action towards now willhelp you in some way, even if
(02:58):
you change your mind.
And I think you'll see thatwith my story, that even some
things that I have done thatseem very unrelated to what I'm
currently doing.
I learned a lot of skills and alot of cool things that now
help me in my coaching business.
So here we go.
Let's start.
When I was in college back inthe late 90s, I went to
(03:20):
University of North Carolina atChapel Hill.
I ran track and cross countrythere, which taught me so much.
I started competing and runningwhen I was nine years old and
so I actually took one year offof running in college to party
and do not great things.
But luckily I came back torunning and found quite a bit of
(03:44):
success there with my runningand I just learned a lot about,
you know, being a teammate andbeing in community and working
really hard for things andsacrificing things and finding
joy in hard things.
So that has stayed with meobviously ever since.
That's also.
My time at UNC was also when Ibecame a journalism major.
(04:07):
The University of NorthCarolina is one of the best
journalism schools in thecountry and I really enjoyed
that major and in the journalismmajor at Carolina, at least
when I was there, you couldchoose a track, so you could
choose like PR or reporting.
I chose marketing and so thatthe journalism and marketing
major really taught me a lotabout how to think about what
(04:30):
people want and what they needand how to get it in front of
them and how to present thingsin a way that what they want and
they need, they know that youhave it and they want to get it
from you.
And so that journalism andmarketing knowledge that I have
has stayed with me now all theway up into this coaching
business, and you're going tohear a little bit more about
(04:51):
that through my journey today.
So that was college.
Then I went to law school, as somany people do when they don't
know what else they want to do,right?
So I finished college.
I remember walking down thestreet on my campus.
I was crying.
I was 22.
I had graduated, I had no ideawhat I wanted to do with my life
(05:11):
and I just remember feeling solost and so untethered and I
literally was just cryingwalking down the street because
I'm like I am supposed to be agrown up and I have no idea what
I want to do.
So I moved home for a littlebit and I took the LSAT and I
went to law school because Ifelt like that was nice and
responsible and that could be agood thing.
(05:32):
And I did find it interesting.
I actually really, really lovedlaw school.
I went to Pepperdine in Malibu,california.
I really enjoyed my time in lawschool, although I knew halfway
through my first year that Iprobably did not want to
practice law.
But I really enjoyed the schoolof it.
I enjoyed the way that welearned and I think what I took
(05:54):
most from law school was I knowhow to take in a lot of
information and quickly pare itdown to what is the issue here,
what is the thing that we needto focus on?
And quickly pare it down towhat is the issue here, what is
the thing that we need to focuson?
And I take that into mycoaching now, where I can have
somebody come on a call with meand sometimes they will kind of
ramble for 15 minutes justtelling me all the things and
(06:18):
I'm able to very quickly distillokay, here's the issue, here's
where there might be a limitingbelief or here's where you might
be getting blocked.
I know how to ask really goodquestions and then we can focus
on the thing that we need tofocus on to help my client move
forward, and so that has beenreally helpful.
Law school also taught me howto persevere even when there
were really hard things going on.
So my first semester in lawschool there was an extreme
(06:43):
domestic incident in my familythat I flew back to North
Carolina for, and it wasextremely disturbing and
upsetting and I had to, you know, go and do what I needed to do
for that and then come back andjust get right back into law
school.
And there was kind of nowaiting around for me.
And then in my third year oflaw school a little bit of a
happier event, but still hard Ihad my son when there were about
(07:06):
10 weeks left of school and myhusband and I lived separately
because I was just, you know, Ihad planned to finish law school
and then we were going to movetogether in Northern California
where he was training for anOlympic development team Olympic
(07:27):
development team and so, youknow, I had a roommate and I had
my son and I was terrified ofhim crying in the night because
I didn't want to wake up myroommate and I didn't have any
childcare.
So I took him with me to classand so I was lugging this heavy,
heavy bag of books and a heavycar seat up this hill from the
parking lot to the law school.
I would nurse him in the backof the class.
Sometimes he would cry and Iwould have to go out in the
lobby, or sometimes there wereother people in the lobby that
(07:49):
worked in class at that time andthey would hold my baby for me.
And it was a lot.
So my mom came out for a fewdays and then my in-laws came
out for a few days while I tookmy exams, and then you know, so
I would go take an exam and Iwould do the breast pump in the
car on the way back to the hotel, um, cause sometimes I was just
like about to burst Um.
So that that was a lot.
(08:11):
And I I took my son with meacross the stage when I got my
law school degree and then I hadto study for the bar exam and
the California bar exam is nojoke, uh.
But I didn't have childcareagain, so I would stay home with
him and sort of try to study.
But any of you that have had aninfant, it's really hard to do
much of anything, and so myhusband would come home around
(08:32):
seven o'clock at night and Iwould immediately leave to go to
a study group.
So there was a study group from7pm to 10pm at night every
night for a couple months andthat was really the only time
that I got to study.
And so then I took and passedthe California bar exam and I
just learned so much about.
I think the biggest thing Ilearned then is I had so many of
(08:53):
my law school classmates thatwere studying like 12, 15, 18
hours a day.
I had a couple friends who wentthrough some major anxiety
episodes and panic attacks and acouple of my friends did not
pass the bar exam on the firsttry and I did.
And I think that one of thereasons why is because I kind of
(09:15):
put it into perspective I hadreally focused time and I didn't
.
I had other things to worryabout.
I had a brand new baby that Iwas trying to keep alive and
keep entertained, and so I justkind of put it into perspective
that there were more importantthings than just this bar exam
and I think that really helpedme, because I think the people
(09:37):
that were so immersed in it andit was like everything this or
bust I think that can add somuch pressure to ourselves
sometimes and I think it justreally helped me to have a
little bit of perspective andalso just really focused study
time where I knew like thesethree hours I have to be like
really intent and intentionaland really get in the
information, because I'm notgoing to be able to do it for
(09:59):
the other hours of the day.
So it just taught me a lotabout kind of prioritizing and
perspective and focused learningand focused attention spans.
So I had my son, then two yearslater, had my daughter, and when
I first became a mother, Ireally got this huge wave of
wanting to be crafty and tocreate things and to sew and
(10:22):
knit and make things for ourhome and make clothing, and it
just could not be denied.
So I started knitting and Istarted sewing and I ended up
starting a business that Icalled Head Full of Pixies and
that's where I sold tote, bags,pillows, that kind of thing, and
I had an online website onShopify and I also did a lot of
(10:47):
craft fairs.
So I did indoors and outdoors,setting up the tent, setting up
the booth, setting up the tableand the merchandising and
standing on my feet for hoursyou know, eight hours at a time,
with a smile on my face andbeing interested in the people
walking by and trying tointerest them in what I was
selling.
And you know, having peoplewalk by the booth and go them in
what I was selling and havingpeople walk by the booth and go
well, I could have made that orI could make that All kinds of
(11:10):
comments that you get when youare manning a craft booth.
But I learned a lot during thattime too.
I learned what it meant to showup for myself and how to make
sales and how to make productswhen I had two kids napping
literally on the floor of mysewing room and I don't know how
the sewing machine didn't wakethem up, but it didn't.
But just learning how to takephotographs and how to write
(11:34):
copy for that on website, and sojust learning all the parts of
owning a product-based businessand having to put yourself out
in the world and try to makesales, okay.
So then we had our third childand we moved to a new state and
I started Stroller Strides.
So it's a franchise.
So I owned my franchise in NewJersey and Stroller Strides is a
(11:58):
fitness class that moms do withtheir babies in the stroller.
So I would bring, depending onwhat day it was depending on if
one of my kids had preschool.
I would either have one kidwith me or two kids, and
sometimes, if my oldest was notat school for like a holiday or
whatever, then I would havethree kids on my exercise
stroller and so, yeah, thattaught me a lot.
(12:18):
That taught me the importance ofmoving your body, because, for
these women who had just hadbabies including myself, I mean
when I started at my baby thattaught me a lot.
That taught me the importanceof moving your body, because,
for these women who had just hadbabies including myself, I mean
when I started at my baby, mythird child was nine months old
but just how good we feel ashumans when we are moving our
body.
It also taught me that I couldjuggle being a mom and owning a
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business.
It was a very successfulbusiness, but I had three kids
under the age of five when Istarted, and so it taught me
also about empowering people.
It felt really good to helpthese moms feel good.
A lot of moms, you know, whenit's their first child, they
feel isolated and alone and theyfeel like they've lost a part
(13:00):
of themselves.
So it was so great to be in acircle of 15, 20 moms and their
babies and see them createcommunity with each other and to
see them coming back into whothey are and reconnecting with
themselves, and it just feltreally good to be a part of that
.
It also taught me how to jugglea lot of needs at one time
because, like I said, there was15 or 20 moms and their babies
(13:22):
so we had to keep the babiesentertained and in their
strollers for 40, I think therewere 45 minute classes.
That's a long time, but wefigured out ways to do both to
work out our bodies and toentertain the kids and that just
felt really good, to just sortof have that.
Like you know, we have a lotgoing on at the moment and we're
(13:42):
able to handle it, so that feltreally good.
I think it also taught me a lotabout how to make sure that
people's needs are met.
So sometimes a mom would have avery ornery baby or colicky
baby and I would make sure thatshe got the workout and
sometimes I would hold the baby,sometimes I would push the
stroller, sometimes I would givethe baby snacks or sing to them
.
So I was making sure that thesemoms got some exercise and got
(14:07):
what they came for, and so I wasalways having to be attuned to
their need.
Are they happy?
Are they feeling exhausted?
What do these moms need and howcan I give that to them?
So I really had to work on mylistening skills, my
observational skills and justconnection with other people.
I also had to learn a lot aboutsales and customer retention and
customer turnover right.
So moms with their babies inthe strollers once their babies
(14:30):
hit about two and a half orthree, they didn't want to stay
in the stroller anymore, and itwas really hard for these moms
to come to class.
And so you know, my customers,my clients, were only with me
for about two years and thenthey would move on, unless they
had another baby, and then withthe new baby they would figure
out how to come.
But so I was always having tobring new moms in to keep my
(14:52):
business alive, and so I had tofind ways to market myself and
to put myself out there andalways attracting new moms to
come in because there was such ahigh rate of turnover.
Also, I learned a lot aboutpartnerships, so I had to find
my own location.
So we actually did StrollerStrides in the mall before they
opened.
We did them at parks.
(15:13):
We did them at the SalvationArmy gym let us rent the gym for
a little bit but I was alwayssearching for different
locations and you know,sometimes we would have events
so I would have to find placesthat we could rent for events.
So it was a lot of learning howto solve problems.
Sometimes a park would beclosed and I would have to
figure out what we're going todo, and so a lot of problem
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solving, a lot of partnershipsand negotiating went into that
too.
Another thing I learned with mytime at Stroller Strides is I
helped that's sort of when Istarted helping people find
their wins.
A lot of times new moms areexhausted.
There are days when they don'teven get to take a shower.
There are days when they arecovered in spit up and vomit and
(15:55):
food and gross stuff, and Ithink it can feel really easy to
get sort of I don't want to saydepressed, but like depressive
when you are a brand new mom and, like I said, you lose your
sense of self and you just kindof like don't know what end is
up.
And so it felt really importantto me to point out to these
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moms all the wins that they werecreating.
They were getting their assesout of bed, they were getting
their kids dressed and packingthe diaper bag, loading up the
stroller into the car, gettingto class on time, you know,
working out their bodies for 45minutes while their kids were
having fun and makingfriendships.
And a lot of these friends, alot of the people that were in
this class, this was like 15, 20years ago.
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They're still friends, and so Imade sure to point out all of
these wins that they werecreating and I wanted to make
sure that they always leftfeeling better than when they
came, and that was just reallyimportant to me.
Also, around this time, myhusband and I started a business
together called Bennett Running.
I know it's like so original,right, but we had day camps, we
(16:57):
had sleepaway camps for highschoolers co-ed, by the way, a
lot of stress there.
We had community runs, we didprivate coaching.
We put on so many differentkinds of events.
We put on many different kindsof races.
It was a lot of fun and it wasa lot of work.
So my marketing skills cameinto play, because I was always
emailing people about our eventsand getting them to sign up and
(17:20):
telling them how to sign up,inviting them to all these
different things.
It was a lot of event planning,right.
So we had, you know, planningall of these different events.
We had to make sure that therewas first aid and that there
were, you know, emts on staffand that we had the proper
insurance and that we had funstuff for the kids to do and
that we had water and we hadsnacks and we had t-shirts and
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all the things.
There's so much that goes intoall of these camps and all of
these events.
So I definitely got really goodat event planning and making it
fun.
And you know, it didn't alwayslook cute there's only so much
cuteness you can make at a daycamp for runner, for cross
country runners or something butwe did our best.
I learned how to manage stressand not that I did a great job
about it.
I always felt a lot of stress,especially with our sleepaway
(18:06):
camps.
So it was co-ed high schoolsleepaway camps for like five
days, six, like six days, fivenights, something like that and
that was really, reallystressful to me because I just
felt like there are so many kidswith their lives in our hands
and I just wanted to make surethat every single thing was like
perfect and in place and I'mhappy to report the only injury
we ever had was somebody chippeda tooth when they tripped on a
(18:29):
rock.
So I felt really good abouthaving years and years of those
camps with nobody, you know,getting lost, nobody getting
injured, like nothing badhappened.
But one funny thing was one timein the summer, a couple weeks
before the summer camp, thesleepaway camp I had a knock on
the door and I went to the doorand it was a mom and she said,
hi, my, my daughter's gonnaattend your sleepaway camp and
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so was her boyfriend and I justwanted you to promise me that
you won't let her get pregnant.
I was like what is happening?
Why are you on my front porchtelling me to not let your
daughter get pregnant?
But I had so much fear and Iwatched that girl like a hawk
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and her boyfriend and we had alot of really good counselors
that I really respected andtrusted.
But that's so terrifying tohave a mom come to your front
door and plead with you withtears in her like absolute
pleading.
But nobody ever got pregnant atour sleepaway camps either.
So you know I'm calling that awin on so many levels.
But no, that was just kind of afunny story about the stress
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that you have to go through whenyou, when you are hosting these
camps and hosting events forpeople, and not only am I so
concerned about their safety,which is ultimately the most
important, of course, but I'm soalways concerned about their
they're having a fun time.
I want them to feel good aboutthemselves and, again, in all of
our events, we wanted people toleave feeling better about
(19:54):
themselves than when they came,and so we did.
There were so many things thatwe did and so many mindset tools
that I learned to help peoplefeel better about themselves
than when they came and to helpthem feel successful and
empowered and to help them findtheir wins and celebrate their
wins.
So that was one of the biggestthings that I learned from my
time with Bennett Running.
I also had to really learn alot about being organized.
(20:17):
So we had, you know, 250 peopleat our camps and all these
people at events and I had tomake sure that everybody there
had a waiver for insurance andyou know that the money was paid
when we rented venues and justso many.
You know contact information,emergency contact information
and so many details to help themknow where to go, at what time
(20:38):
and what to bring, and so I hadto learn how to be really
organized, and that's when Ibecame very good friends with
Excel and Google Sheets and allthe spreadsheets.
So, yeah, that was where mypassion and love for
spreadsheets happened.
I remember first learning aboutExcel in my marketing major and
journalism major and I rememberthinking like this is terrible,
I'm never going to use this,and I use it all the time now
(21:00):
for the last, like decades.
So, all right, what else?
What do we have next?
So, also, while Bennett Runningwas going on, I started coaching
moms and the Stroller Stridemoms.
So some of them graduated sortof, and some of them still did
this with their babies, but Istarted coaching them to run
their first 5k.
So most of the moms in my grouphadn't really been runners
before, but since I had been arunner since I was nine, I knew
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a lot about running and so Istarted coaching them and that
was so fun to see these moms gofrom you know zero to 5k, but
they would do these 5k races andnot walk at all in a pretty
short amount of time, and it wasjust so fun.
And a fun fact, one of the momsin that group now does ultra
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marathons, so like more than 100miles or more and she was
actually on my podcast.
I'll link to that episode inthe notes.
But her name is Lisa Devona andshe's been a very successful
ultra marathoner.
So look for that link if you'reinterested in hearing her story
, because it's really cool.
But so I also started coachingin middle school.
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So I wanted my kids to havereally good experiences with
running.
I didn't want them to have.
I didn't want running to be notfun for them, and so I knew
that if I was their coach, thatthey were really going to enjoy
running.
So I also started coaching atthe middle school, and so what I
learned from these coachingexperiences is how to make hard
work fun.
So we did really hard workouts,both with the moms and the
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middle school kids.
We did really hard workouts.
They were age appropriate andthey felt really fun.
And it doesn't mean that we hadto play games.
It just meant that I think thekey to making something fun is
to feel successful at it.
Right, we all want to feelsuccessful at things, and if we
feel successful, we're going tohave fun and we're going to want
to do it more, and so I foundall these different ways to help
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these kids and the moms feelsuccessful and again they left
better.
They left feeling better thanwhen they came to practice.
I also learned a lot aboutherding cats my husband called
it, you know.
He looked at one of mypractices one time and there was
like 65 kids running around andit was very contained chaos.
I knew exactly what was goingon and what they were doing, but
he was like this is literallylike herding cats and it kind of
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was.
But so I learned a lot againabout having my attention be in
all kinds of differentdirections but having it still
all like organized chaos, right,contained chaos.
Okay.
So also around this time, Ireally wanted to get back to
some of the creativity that Ihad stopped doing while I was
doing all of this runningcoaching and all of the running
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event planning.
So I started I wanted to getinto art licensing.
So that means that I wouldcreate art and then I would try
to license it to companies touse on their products.
So anything from shoes tobedding, to stationery, to gift
bags, to wallpaper, to curtains,fabric, anything that you look
(23:54):
around in your world and seeanything with a print or pattern
on it.
There is a designer somewherethat designed that, and so I
never even knew that that was athing.
But I was making a quilt and Iwas looking at the fabric and
I'm like it dawned on mesomebody designed this, somebody
designed this pattern, and inthat moment I was like I want to
(24:15):
be the person that designs thepatterns for these things.
And so I didn't know anythingabout art.
I'd only taken art, like for ayear, like in sixth grade,
because it was mandatory.
I never thought of myself ascreative or an artist, but I
decided that I wanted to be anartist and I wanted to license
my work, and so I signed up fora quick class online about how
to use Adobe Illustrator, whichis just a program, a software
(24:36):
program to help you createpatterns, and I decided I was
going to make a repeat patternevery single day.
I think this was in 2011.
My years get all fuzzy, so it'saround 2011.
So I started doing that and Iposted them online a lot.
And then the posting online gotto be too hard and my website
(24:56):
wouldn't hold all of that manyimages, so I stopped posting
them daily, but I did create atleast one every single day.
And then I entered a fabricdesign competition I think it
was called the Printed Bolt.
It was the repeat competition.
I had no business entering it.
The judges on this were giantsin the industry, but I got
(25:17):
fourth and I felt really goodabout that and I think what that
taught me is to do thingssometimes before I felt ready.
I am really proud of that skill.
I'm really proud of the gutsthat I have sometimes to just
put myself in the ring beforeI'm even ready there and have
(25:40):
guts and have faith in myselfthat I'm going to figure it out.
And that's what I did.
So when I applied, I had no, Ihad no expectation that they
were going to even let me in thecompetition and it was sort of
like a project runway way stylecompetition.
So they would give you like abrief, they would tell you what
they wanted, and then you hadlike three days to do it and
then they judged and thensomebody went home and I kept
(26:00):
making it through, rounds androunds and you know I finally
got out right before the finalthree, which was so
heartbreaking.
I figured it out as I went andI was terrified the whole time.
I mean, I was like my body wasjust going through so much, like
oh my gosh, what is happening?
This was public, it was onblogs, and the humiliation risk
was real.
But I love that I developedthat skill to just put myself
(26:23):
out there, trust that I'm goingto figure it out and figure it
out as I go along.
So that was really important tomy philosophy that I now use
with my coaching.
It also taught me a lot aboutdaily habits.
So I think actually back in2009 is when I started doing
daily habits and I started kindof sketching a little bit every
day.
But having this pattern a daywas pretty time intensive and so
(26:46):
it just taught me a lot abouthow to keep showing up for
myself, even when I didn't wantto, and it just felt really good
for my brain to know every dayI know that no matter what else
I accomplish, I'm also going toaccomplish doing a pattern on
the computer, and so it justfelt really good.
Then in 2012, I think it was Iwent to Surtex, which is surface
and textile trade show in NewYork.
(27:08):
It's at the Javits Center.
It happens every year and thisis where artists come and they
have their booths with all oftheir art and then all of the
companies and manufacturers comeand they walk from booth to
booth and they decide whose artthey want to license for their
products.
And I had this dream of workingwith a fabric company to put my
art on fabrics to make, youknow, for quilting fabrics.
(27:29):
And one of my dream companieswas Wintem Fabrics.
And so just put that aside forjust a minute.
So my booth was a corner booth.
I was right across the aislefrom Kelly Ventura and she was
super sweet, still is supersweet, just had gorgeous
watercolor work, a lot ofwatercolor florals, gorgeous
(27:50):
work.
And she and I, you know, as youdo when you're at trade shows
and booths and craft fairs andsuch, you get to know the people
around you.
And so we had shared our mutual.
You know, we both had a dreamof working with Wyndham Fabrics
and yourics and licensing ourdesigns.
So the first day of the show itwas a three-day show.
The first day of the show Idon't think I mean hardly
anybody came by my booth andstopped to talk to me and it was
(28:13):
so demoralizing maybe would bethe right word to stand there on
your feet in heels and a dressand uncomfortable, and is my
makeup melting off and I'mhungry and I have to go to the
bathroom.
But I'm the only person in mybooth.
And what if my dream clientcomes by right when I go to the
bathroom or right when I go geta snack, all of those stresses
of being at a trade show soloand so you know, standing there
(28:35):
and acting like, oh, I'm sohappy, it's okay that nobody's
stopping at my booth.
And anyway, on the first daymaybe I don't know the first day
or second day this group ofpeople came up to Kelly
Ventura's booth and they stayedfor a while and they were
looking through her stuff andthey signed a contract and they
walked away and I was like whowas that?
And she was like WyndhamFabrics and I was so excited for
(28:56):
her and she still has fabriccollections with Wyndham today.
She's still putting out fabriccollections with them.
So this has been a very longtime that they've been working
together.
And as I was so excited for herand still am there, was this
(29:18):
like really sad part of me thatshe got this and I didn't.
And it felt really hard andjoyous at the same time because
I was so happy for her and herwork so deserves it.
And also I think the publichumiliation of it Like for her
and her work so deserves it.
And also I think the publichumiliation of it, like I had
told her that that was my dreamand she got it and I didn't, and
they didn't even glance at mybooth.
I mean, they were notinterested at all and so there
was just the like, the sadnessabout it and that like the
(29:42):
knowing that she knew that Ididn't get my dream, I think
felt a little bit hard.
So the reason I'm bringing thatup is because I know what it
feels like when my clients areputting themselves out there and
they're scared of humiliation,they're scared of failure,
they're scared of it not workingout, they're scared of looking
dumb, they're scared of peoplenot liking their work.
(30:02):
I mean I totally, I viscerallyfeel it in my body what it felt
like to be in that booth.
Spoiler alert I ended up comingaway with several licensing
contracts that lasted me yearsand years and that felt really
good.
But I know how it feels tostand in a booth all alone and
have nobody coming and buyingyour work.
(30:22):
I know how it feels, and so Ithink that has helped me so much
when I work with a lot of mycreative clients that they go to
trade shows or they go to artshows or they're putting
themselves out there and, youknow, applying or submitting
themselves for juriedcompetitions.
I know how it feels to be onthe sort of fail side when it
doesn't work out the way youwant it, and the win side,
(30:43):
because I've had a lot of winsalso.
But I just I know how it feels,I know how much work goes into
it.
So then, after Certex, I camehome, I did all the follow up
and then I went on a mission tojust pitch the heck out of all
the companies I could find.
So anytime I was on a giftstore, if there was like a gift
or some, or fabric, somethingwith a design on it, I would
pick it up and I would look atwho was manufactured by and I
(31:04):
would write it down in a littlenotebook.
And then I would go home and Iwould find the contact
information for that company andI would send them my portfolio
and say, hey, I would reallylove to work with you.
Here's the artwork I haveavailable for licensing.
So I was pitching myself allthe time, and so, again, I was
putting myself up there on thechopping block, right, I was
like, here I am, I'm puttingmyself in the face of rejection,
(31:25):
what are you going to do?
And I got a lot of licensingcontracts that way.
But, again, it taught me somuch about pitching yourself and
believing in yourself and doingit over and over and knowing
that it's a numbers game andthat you are going to get a lot
of no's and you're going to getsome yeses too, if you just keep
putting yourself out there longenough.
Also, around the same time, Istarted the Happy, happy Art
Collective.
So I was in some kind of onlineart class and there were so
(31:51):
many amazing artists that wereworlds above and beyond what I
could ever create in art, and Ireached out to five of them and
I asked them to be in an artcollective with me.
These were women that I admired, these were women whose work I
admired, and they all said yes.
And when I put out the invite,I'm like, oh, they're probably
(32:12):
not going to want to work withme because my work is so much
worse than theirs and they'renot going to want to be
associated with my art, and Ijust had all of these feelings,
insecure feelings, but also thisself-trust, when I was like,
well, the worst that couldhappen is they say no and then
like it's totally fine, right,like maybe I'll be like a little
bit sad for a day and then I'llget over it, I'll move on.
(32:32):
But they all said yes and wehad such a good time.
We would meet online I think itwas Skype back then, I don't
even remember.
I don't feel like Zoom evenexisted back then but we would
meet online and we artist in anart business or any kind of
(33:11):
creative business.
A lot of the work is alone.
A lot of the time you're justspent alone creating your work,
and it's so important to haveother people to connect with.
And so I think I wasn't feelingthat connection and so I
decided I'm going to create it.
I don't feel like I have acommunity.
I don't feel like I have peoplethat understand what it feels
like to submit your work and toget another no and sometimes a
(33:31):
yes, and so I created thatcommunity.
So another thing I learned fromthere is if you don't have what
you want, if you don't have thesupport system that you want,
then go create it, make ithappen for you.
If you know you need connectionand community and support and
network, then go create that foryourself.
It was very easy.
It was a simple email, Okay.
So around that time, like aftera few years of art licensing, I
(33:54):
wanted to branch out on my ownand make my own art.
So what happens in artlicensing is you are at the kind
of direction of the artdirector of the company that is
licensing your work, so theymight come back and tell you can
you take out that font, or canyou use a different font, or can
you use a different blue, orcan you move that bird over to
the other side?
And so you're at their callinga little bit right, like they
(34:18):
know what sells for theirproducts, they know what sells
for their customers, and so youhave to change your artwork
around sometimes, which istotally fine.
But I wanted to have my voiceheard and not have it be edited
or changed, and so I startedTiger Pocket Press, which was my
stationary company.
So I had greeting cards, enamelpins and stickers and notepads,
(34:39):
and that just felt really,really fun.
And so the biggest thing Ilearned there that I now take
into my coaching is how to trustin the creative process and how
to trust in my art and myvision and knowing that there is
someone out there for me.
There will be people who don'tlike my work, but there are
definitely going to be peoplethat do, and I just have to
(34:59):
figure out how to get myself infront of the people that do.
So I went to a trade show againat Javits Center in New York.
It's a national stationery showand it actually happens at the
same time as SurTech.
So I just felt like, oh, fullcircle.
Here I am again.
I met some amazing people.
One of them was Tiffany McGrawof Paper Rehab, and she is also
on a podcast, so I will link toher episode here too.
(35:20):
So I made a lot of goodconnections with other artists
and I made a lot of sales andthat felt really good, and I
want to share a little storywith you here.
So and I might've told thisbefore in another episode, but
I'm going to tell you again so,before I went to the trade show,
I sent out a lot of catalogsand notes and, you know, sample
cards to some of my dream stores.
(35:42):
And I just said you know I'mgoing to be at the National
Stationery Show.
Please come by and visit.
I would love to.
You know, I'd love to meet youand you know here's the cards
for sale.
And I didn't hear back from anyof those stores before the
trade show.
But I had this dream list youknow, like if these people come
by that'd be amazing, and so on.
I don't remember which day itwas.
Again, it was a three day show.
(36:02):
On one of the days, one of mydream stores Gus and Ruby is the
name of the store.
They're in the Northeast, theyhave multiple locations.
They came up to me and theyplaced the largest order I had
ever had to that point and for along time.
After cards and they left andas they were walking away, they
(36:25):
put a checkmark on theirclipboard by my name.
And so what I'm telling youhere is I had these dream stores
.
I reached out and I heardcrickets at first, right before
the trade show, which is common,like people aren't going to
really write out to you before atrade show because they're just
going to come by and visit you.
But the point was I didn't knowif my work was resonating, I
didn't know if people wereinterested in me.
I didn't know if they evenreceived my letter and my sample
(36:46):
package, and then they had ontheir clipboard a list of people
that they wanted to see andorder from, and so my message to
you, if you're listening, ifyou have your own kind of
creative business or any kind ofbusiness where you are doing
sales, is there are people outthere ready to buy from you,
even if it doesn't seem like it,right?
(37:06):
So heading into the show, I washearing crickets, but leaving
the show I had tons of orders,and so just know that your
people, your customers, yourclients are out there watching
you and they just haven't boughtyet.
You just have to keep showingup and getting in front of them
and they will place their order.
These people that want what youhave, they are going to place
(37:28):
the order with you or they aregoing to sign up to work with
you, but you just have to keepshowing up and making it easy
for them, right?
So it was super easy for Gus andRuby to come place an order
with me.
They walked straight up to me,they order, they were in and out
, they crossed me off the listand they were on to the next
because they already knew whatthey wanted.
They already knew they wantedto buy from me and I made it
really easy for them by being ata trade show where a lot of the
(37:49):
other stores, a lot of theother artists that they buy from
, were also located right.
So that became my mantra overthe next year or two, gus and
Ruby, because I started sendingmy workout, samples of my work,
catalogs, emails, all kinds ofthings, and I pitched.
There were months when I wouldpitch about 50 to 100 on a month
(38:10):
and then sometimes I would takea month off and then go again
hard 50 to 100.
So I was constantly puttingmyself out there and sometimes a
week would go by and I wouldhear nothing, crickets, and I
would start to feel discouraged.
And then I reminded myself Gusand Ruby, gus and Ruby, your
people are out there, they'rewatching, they're going to buy
from you.
You just have to keep showingup.
(38:32):
And that really kept me goingfor the next couple years and I
ended up in over 100 independentgift and stationery stores
across the US within the nextyear and that felt really good
to hit that 100 mark in a year,because that was kind of one of
my goals and I did that byhaving faith in myself, that
(38:53):
what I was doing was working,that my art was good enough,
that my marketing was goodenough, and I just kept showing
up over and over and over withthat mantra Gus and Ruby.
So some of the skills I learnedhere.
In addition to that havingtrust in my art, trust in my
vision, trust that my buyers, myclients, customers, were out
there I also learned how tohandle rejection, because I got
a lot of no's.
(39:13):
I think it's about a 2% or 3%conversion rate.
So let's say, if I'm sendingout 100 pitch letters, only 2 or
3 of those typically are goingto turn into customers.
So that's like 97 or 98 no'sthat I'm getting each time.
And so to just keep practicingthat faith in yourself and in
(39:36):
your art and just keep showingup and knowing it's a numbers
game, you just have to keepshowing up.
I also learned a ton aboutinventory, tracking and stocking
and packaging and shipping andall those other things, but I
think the more important thingsare to just learn to keep
showing up and to have thatfaith in yourself and in your
art and in your work, whateverit is that you're doing.
Okay, this is turning into asuper long episode.
(39:58):
I thank you for staying with me.
We're getting near the end.
We're getting really close.
Okay, thank you so much, friend, for still being here.
But so 2015 to 2019 were reallyreally hard years for me
personally.
We moved across the country.
We just had a lot going on.
All this time I was stillcoaching, I was still creating
and selling my products acrossthe US and I started around.
(40:21):
This time I started teachingtiny daily habits.
So I was teaching how to createa tiny daily habit, how to keep
it, and so I started teachingall kinds of workshops.
I was teaching vision boards,tiny daily habits to lots of
different organizations andgroups, and I had accountability
clubs and I was teaching aclass called the Book of Me,
(40:41):
where it's just aboutself-discovery, and I even did
that at some birthday parties.
So I was just testing ideasbasically for different things
to teach and seeing whatresonated with people and what
didn't, and tweaking things andmaking them better.
And so there, I had to learn alot about teaching.
I had to learn a lot aboutmarketing.
I had to learn about how tomake people feel welcome and
(41:02):
safe and excited, to learn andto keep them interested.
So a lot of those skills Istill use, you know, today,
obviously in my coaching and inmy teaching and my speaking
engagements.
And that brings us to thepandemic.
So, sadly, I wasn't able tomeet with my runners in person
anymore, so we weren't, you know, with the quarantine and
(41:22):
everything.
And there were a couple daysduring the pandemic when it was
just getting really discouraging, right when the whole country
was just the whole United Stateswas feeling just kind of low
and isolated.
And there was a day when Ispent like eight or 10 hours
packaging envelopes.
The good news is that I had alot of orders.
(41:43):
The bad news is that it wasjust me, just alone in a room,
putting the envelope with thecard, putting it in a cellophane
package and then packaging themup into shipping containers.
And I just thought I want tohave more of an impact on the
world, on humanity.
I want to connect with peoplemore than just sitting in a room
by myself packing orders foreight to 10 hours.
(42:03):
And so I started reallythinking about how to make a
shift oh, I forgot to say to youlike in 2019, I also started my
.
I started this podcast, the showup society podcast, because I
really wanted to help peoplewith things that I had been
struggling with of how to showup for themselves and how to
break tasks down into tiny steps, and so, while I was kind of
reviewing and revisiting what Iwanted to do with my life, now
(42:29):
that I couldn't, you know, Iwanted to have something where I
could connect with people thatfelt just a little bit more
meaningful and impactful to me.
I decided to use all of thetools that I've used from
everything I've talked about sofar on this podcast to help
people, and so I started taking,I started a certification for
life coaching.
(42:49):
I started coaching my face off,coaching anybody who would let
me coaching all over the place,obviously with consent.
But I asked people like, hey,would you like some free
coaching?
And I did tons and tons of freecoaching, and so then that
brings me to here, where now ithas been years of me being
mindset coach and I've readcountless articles about the
(43:11):
evidence-based mindset tips andtools that I teach.
I am now getting my master'sdegree in sport and performance
psychology to help me be even abetter coach, but I absolutely
love what I do.
I feel like all the things thatI've done have led me to here
and it has all clicked in and Itake things from everything that
I've mentioned to help me be abetter coach and to help people,
(43:34):
and so I feel like none ofthose things was a waste of time
.
None of those things was awaste of money or energy.
I learned so much about myself.
I learned so much about peopleand interaction and sales and
communication.
I learned so much about myself.
I learned so much about peopleand interaction and sales and
communication.
I learned about how to balancetime.
I learned about how to keepthings interesting and how to
(43:54):
listen to people.
I learned how to handlerejection.
I learned how to help peoplefeel successful and not be
afraid of rejection.
I helped people overcomeprocrastination and
perfectionism and I've honed myteaching and speaking and
listening and observing skillsand I help people pitch
themselves and developself-trust.
I'm able to quickly spot aproblem and help people with the
(44:17):
thing that's getting in theirway.
I'm able to find that reallyquickly so we can root it out
and change it.
I'm really good at helpingpeople find focus and
intentional work time and I'mgood at helping people sell and
market and create and interactwith other people.
So all of these skills I'velearned from all the things that
I've done have helped me becomea better coach and they've
(44:39):
helped me build my business, andnow that's what I help people
do, right, and so on next week'sepisode, when I'm talking about
my coaching and what I helpwith and what can happen for
people when they work with me oranother coach, it all comes
from here, right?
It's like all roads lead toRome, like all the things that
(45:00):
I've done have led me to hereand it clicks and it feels so
good to help people in this wayand I feel like I have.
I feel like I'm the luckiestperson in the world and I have
the best job in the worldgetting to work with people and
helping them get over theirblocks and really create the
lives that they want to create.
So I am so grateful to my pastself for doing all of these
(45:23):
different hard, hard things andspending the time and the money
and the energy, even if it's notwhat I do anymore, right?
So I don't practice law, but Iam so grateful to the past me
that went through law schoolbecause it taught me so much
about myself as a person andit's helped me become a way
better coach.
Same thing with all of thebusinesses that I've mentioned.
I am so grateful to past me fordoing all of that work, to
(45:45):
getting me to here.
So if you are somebody thatfeels like you are
multi-passionate ormulti-faceted, and you have many
, many interests and you're notsure which one to choose, my
advice to you is just choose oneand go, do it.
And if you want to then changeyour mind and do something else,
then do that.
But the only way that you'regoing to figure out what really
(46:05):
really lands home for you, whatreally feels good for you, is to
go out and start doing one ofthe things right now, like
literally today.
Just go and choose one of thethings on your list that you
might be interested in and takesome action in that today,
because you're never going tofigure out what feels good to
you until you're actually in it,doing it.
So all the prep, all theresearch in the world is not
(46:27):
going to help you.
The only thing that's going tohelp you decide what you want to
be doing with your wild andprecious life is to go, start
doing a thing and then you canfigure it out Does it feel good,
do you like it or do you not,so thank you for being on this.
This is one of the longerpodcast episodes I've had in a
really long time, but thank youso much for being here and thank
you for showing up to thisepisode of the Show Up Society
(46:49):
podcast.
Now go out there and show upfor yourself.
Hey friend, if you liked thispodcast episode and you want
help applying it to your life soyou can do more of what you
want and feel good while doingit, you're going to love working
with me one-on-one for sixmonths.
I'll help you with strategy andmindset so you can figure out
what you want, make an actionplan, and I'll help you get
(47:10):
unstuck all along the way.
Go to showupsocietycom forward,slash coaching to set up a
consultation to see if we are agood fit for each other.
Oh, hey, loyal podcast listener,thank you for being here all
the way through to the end.
Okay, are you ready for yourassignment?
This is your secret assignment.
(47:30):
So go to Instagram, find me atShow Up Society, find the post
that corresponds to this podcastepisode, and in the comments, I
want you to leave me someemojis of things that you have
done right, so give me a clue asto what different careers or
hobbies or jobs that you've hadthat have led you to be who you
(47:51):
are.
I think it'll be really fun forus to see you know I'll know
that you listened to thispodcast episode and the other
people that have also listenedand they're leaving emojis.
We can all see what each otherhas done and what experiences
we've had.
So I think that will be reallycool to just have our kind of
life history put into pictureform.
So thank you so much for beinghere and I appreciate you.
(48:13):
Have a good day.
You are listening to the Show Up Society podcast.
If you want to feel betterabout the way you show up in the
world, you're in the exactright place.
I'm your host, certified lifecoach, tammy Bennett, and I'm
here to help you stop giving apoop about what others think so
you can make confident decisions.
Your whole outlook on goalswill change too.
You'll see.
They can be fun, doable andfull of celebration, not
(00:24):
something to be afraid offailing.
And speaking of fears, I'llhelp you work through all of
yours so you can take moreaction.
You're already a badass in mybook, and if you want to learn
how to create the life you want,then get your buns in here and
let's go.
Hey friend, welcome to episode233 of the Show Up Society
(00:44):
podcast, today's episode.
I'm going to be talking a littlebit about my origin story and
how I got started coaching.
A couple months ago, I asked onInstagram what people would
like to hear on the podcast andI had a couple people say that
they wanted to know more aboutmy journey and what I did before
coaching and how I became acoach and that kind of thing.
So I felt like today would be afun day to do that I was
(01:08):
thinking back to a recentepisode where I talked about how
people don't know who we areand what we have to offer in the
world unless we tell them, andso I wanted to take this episode
to talk about how I became acoach and then, probably next
episode, I'm going to talk alittle bit about what I do, like
what I actually do as a coachand what that looks like.
(01:30):
So this will be sort of thebackground, and I thought it
would be interesting too to sortof show how all the things that
I did prior to coaching haveled me to here and they've all
mattered and they've all beenreally important to my skills as
a coach.
And I think it's important forme to bring that up, because I
used to be really scared ofsetting goals because I had very
(01:53):
short attention span and Ithought, well, what if I spend
all this time and money andenergy working on this goal and
then I get there and I don'twant it, or I want to change my
mind, or I want to do adifferent thing, and I don't
want my time, energy and moneyto be wasted if I'm going to put
it all towards something andthen decide to do something else
, and so I used to be totallyafraid of making a choice and
(02:17):
taking action forward, because Iwas like, well, I don't know if
that's what I'm going to wantto do in two years or four years
, I don't know.
I don't want to waste time,money and energy.
And it just turned out that Iwas wasting time, money and
energy by just spinning mywheels, and so I just wanted you
to know that it's okay for youto choose a goal and to go after
it and then change your mind ata later date, because, I mean,
(02:37):
we're human, we have lots ofinterests, and a lot of people
in my audience have ADHD, andyou know, a lot of people in my
audience have ADHD, and a lot ofpeople in my audience are
creative and we want to do allthe things.
Everything is interesting to us, or at least a lot of things
are interesting to us, and wewant to kind of do them all.
And so this is my message toyou that whatever you do decide
to take action towards now willhelp you in some way, even if
(02:58):
you change your mind.
And I think you'll see thatwith my story, that even some
things that I have done thatseem very unrelated to what I'm
currently doing.
I learned a lot of skills and alot of cool things that now
help me in my coaching business.
So here we go.
Let's start.
When I was in college back inthe late 90s, I went to
(03:20):
University of North Carolina atChapel Hill.
I ran track and cross countrythere, which taught me so much.
I started competing and runningwhen I was nine years old and
so I actually took one year offof running in college to party
and do not great things.
But luckily I came back torunning and found quite a bit of
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success there with my runningand I just learned a lot about,
you know, being a teammate andbeing in community and working
really hard for things andsacrificing things and finding
joy in hard things.
So that has stayed with meobviously ever since.
That's also.
My time at UNC was also when Ibecame a journalism major.
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The University of NorthCarolina is one of the best
journalism schools in thecountry and I really enjoyed
that major and in the journalismmajor at Carolina, at least
when I was there, you couldchoose a track, so you could
choose like PR or reporting.
I chose marketing and so thatthe journalism and marketing
major really taught me a lotabout how to think about what
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people want and what they needand how to get it in front of
them and how to present thingsin a way that what they want and
they need, they know that youhave it and they want to get it
from you.
And so that journalism andmarketing knowledge that I have
has stayed with me now all theway up into this coaching
business, and you're going tohear a little bit more about
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that through my journey today.
So that was college.
Then I went to law school, as somany people do when they don't
know what else they want to do,right?
So I finished college.
I remember walking down thestreet on my campus.
I was crying.
I was 22.
I had graduated, I had no ideawhat I wanted to do with my life
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and I just remember feeling solost and so untethered and I
literally was just cryingwalking down the street because
I'm like I am supposed to be agrown up and I have no idea what
I want to do.
So I moved home for a littlebit and I took the LSAT and I
went to law school because Ifelt like that was nice and
responsible and that could be agood thing.
(05:32):
And I did find it interesting.
I actually really, really lovedlaw school.
I went to Pepperdine in Malibu,california.
I really enjoyed my time in lawschool, although I knew halfway
through my first year that Iprobably did not want to
practice law.
But I really enjoyed the schoolof it.
I enjoyed the way that welearned and I think what I took
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most from law school was I knowhow to take in a lot of
information and quickly pare itdown to what is the issue here,
what is the thing that we needto focus on?
And quickly pare it down towhat is the issue here, what is
the thing that we need to focuson?
And I take that into mycoaching now, where I can have
somebody come on a call with meand sometimes they will kind of
ramble for 15 minutes justtelling me all the things and
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I'm able to very quickly distillokay, here's the issue, here's
where there might be a limitingbelief or here's where you might
be getting blocked.
I know how to ask really goodquestions and then we can focus
on the thing that we need tofocus on to help my client move
forward, and so that has beenreally helpful.
Law school also taught me howto persevere even when there
were really hard things going on.
So my first semester in lawschool there was an extreme
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domestic incident in my familythat I flew back to North
Carolina for, and it wasextremely disturbing and
upsetting and I had to, you know, go and do what I needed to do
for that and then come back andjust get right back into law
school.
And there was kind of nowaiting around for me.
And then in my third year oflaw school a little bit of a
happier event, but still hard Ihad my son when there were about
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10 weeks left of school and myhusband and I lived separately
because I was just, you know, Ihad planned to finish law school
and then we were going to movetogether in Northern California
where he was training for anOlympic development team Olympic
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development team and so, youknow, I had a roommate and I had
my son and I was terrified ofhim crying in the night because
I didn't want to wake up myroommate and I didn't have any
childcare.
So I took him with me to classand so I was lugging this heavy,
heavy bag of books and a heavycar seat up this hill from the
parking lot to the law school.
I would nurse him in the backof the class.
Sometimes he would cry and Iwould have to go out in the
lobby, or sometimes there wereother people in the lobby that
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worked in class at that time andthey would hold my baby for me.
And it was a lot.
So my mom came out for a fewdays and then my in-laws came
out for a few days while I tookmy exams, and then you know, so
I would go take an exam and Iwould do the breast pump in the
car on the way back to the hotel, um, cause sometimes I was just
like about to burst Um.
So that that was a lot.
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And I I took my son with meacross the stage when I got my
law school degree and then I hadto study for the bar exam and
the California bar exam is nojoke, uh.
But I didn't have childcareagain, so I would stay home with
him and sort of try to study.
But any of you that have had aninfant, it's really hard to do
much of anything, and so myhusband would come home around
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seven o'clock at night and Iwould immediately leave to go to
a study group.
So there was a study group from7pm to 10pm at night every
night for a couple months andthat was really the only time
that I got to study.
And so then I took and passedthe California bar exam and I
just learned so much about.
I think the biggest thing Ilearned then is I had so many of
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my law school classmates thatwere studying like 12, 15, 18
hours a day.
I had a couple friends who wentthrough some major anxiety
episodes and panic attacks and acouple of my friends did not
pass the bar exam on the firsttry and I did.
And I think that one of thereasons why is because I kind of
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put it into perspective I hadreally focused time and I didn't
.
I had other things to worryabout.
I had a brand new baby that Iwas trying to keep alive and
keep entertained, and so I justkind of put it into perspective
that there were more importantthings than just this bar exam
and I think that really helpedme, because I think the people
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that were so immersed in it andit was like everything this or
bust I think that can add somuch pressure to ourselves
sometimes and I think it justreally helped me to have a
little bit of perspective andalso just really focused study
time where I knew like thesethree hours I have to be like
really intent and intentionaland really get in the
information, because I'm notgoing to be able to do it for
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the other hours of the day.
So it just taught me a lotabout kind of prioritizing and
perspective and focused learningand focused attention spans.
So I had my son, then two yearslater, had my daughter, and when
I first became a mother, Ireally got this huge wave of
wanting to be crafty and tocreate things and to sew and
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knit and make things for ourhome and make clothing, and it
just could not be denied.
So I started knitting and Istarted sewing and I ended up
starting a business that Icalled Head Full of Pixies and
that's where I sold tote, bags,pillows, that kind of thing, and
I had an online website onShopify and I also did a lot of
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craft fairs.
So I did indoors and outdoors,setting up the tent, setting up
the booth, setting up the tableand the merchandising and
standing on my feet for hoursyou know, eight hours at a time,
with a smile on my face andbeing interested in the people
walking by and trying tointerest them in what I was
selling.
And you know, having peoplewalk by the booth and go them in
what I was selling and havingpeople walk by the booth and go
well, I could have made that orI could make that All kinds of
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comments that you get when youare manning a craft booth.
But I learned a lot during thattime too.
I learned what it meant to showup for myself and how to make
sales and how to make productswhen I had two kids napping
literally on the floor of mysewing room and I don't know how
the sewing machine didn't wakethem up, but it didn't.
But just learning how to takephotographs and how to write
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copy for that on website, and sojust learning all the parts of
owning a product-based businessand having to put yourself out
in the world and try to makesales, okay.
So then we had our third childand we moved to a new state and
I started Stroller Strides.
So it's a franchise.
So I owned my franchise in NewJersey and Stroller Strides is a
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fitness class that moms do withtheir babies in the stroller.
So I would bring, depending onwhat day it was depending on if
one of my kids had preschool.
I would either have one kidwith me or two kids, and
sometimes, if my oldest was notat school for like a holiday or
whatever, then I would havethree kids on my exercise
stroller and so, yeah, thattaught me a lot.
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That taught me the importance ofmoving your body, because, for
these women who had just hadbabies including myself, I mean
when I started at my baby thattaught me a lot.
That taught me the importanceof moving your body, because,
for these women who had just hadbabies including myself, I mean
when I started at my baby, mythird child was nine months old
but just how good we feel ashumans when we are moving our
body.
It also taught me that I couldjuggle being a mom and owning a
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business.
It was a very successfulbusiness, but I had three kids
under the age of five when Istarted, and so it taught me
also about empowering people.
It felt really good to helpthese moms feel good.
A lot of moms, you know, whenit's their first child, they
feel isolated and alone and theyfeel like they've lost a part
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of themselves.
So it was so great to be in acircle of 15, 20 moms and their
babies and see them createcommunity with each other and to
see them coming back into whothey are and reconnecting with
themselves, and it just feltreally good to be a part of that
.
It also taught me how to jugglea lot of needs at one time
because, like I said, there was15 or 20 moms and their babies
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so we had to keep the babiesentertained and in their
strollers for 40, I think therewere 45 minute classes.
That's a long time, but wefigured out ways to do both to
work out our bodies and toentertain the kids and that just
felt really good, to just sortof have that.
Like you know, we have a lotgoing on at the moment and we're
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able to handle it, so that feltreally good.
I think it also taught me a lotabout how to make sure that
people's needs are met.
So sometimes a mom would have avery ornery baby or colicky
baby and I would make sure thatshe got the workout and
sometimes I would hold the baby,sometimes I would push the
stroller, sometimes I would givethe baby snacks or sing to them
.
So I was making sure that thesemoms got some exercise and got
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what they came for, and so I wasalways having to be attuned to
their need.
Are they happy?
Are they feeling exhausted?
What do these moms need and howcan I give that to them?
So I really had to work on mylistening skills, my
observational skills and justconnection with other people.
I also had to learn a lot aboutsales and customer retention and
customer turnover right.
So moms with their babies inthe strollers once their babies
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hit about two and a half orthree, they didn't want to stay
in the stroller anymore, and itwas really hard for these moms
to come to class.
And so you know, my customers,my clients, were only with me
for about two years and thenthey would move on, unless they
had another baby, and then withthe new baby they would figure
out how to come.
But so I was always having tobring new moms in to keep my
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business alive, and so I had tofind ways to market myself and
to put myself out there andalways attracting new moms to
come in because there was such ahigh rate of turnover.
Also, I learned a lot aboutpartnerships, so I had to find
my own location.
So we actually did StrollerStrides in the mall before they
opened.
We did them at parks.
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We did them at the SalvationArmy gym let us rent the gym for
a little bit but I was alwayssearching for different
locations and you know,sometimes we would have events
so I would have to find placesthat we could rent for events.
So it was a lot of learning howto solve problems.
Sometimes a park would beclosed and I would have to
figure out what we're going todo, and so a lot of problem
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solving, a lot of partnershipsand negotiating went into that
too.
Another thing I learned with mytime at Stroller Strides is I
helped that's sort of when Istarted helping people find
their wins.
A lot of times new moms areexhausted.
There are days when they don'teven get to take a shower.
There are days when they arecovered in spit up and vomit and
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food and gross stuff, and Ithink it can feel really easy to
get sort of I don't want to saydepressed, but like depressive
when you are a brand new mom and, like I said, you lose your
sense of self and you just kindof like don't know what end is
up.
And so it felt really importantto me to point out to these
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moms all the wins that they werecreating.
They were getting their assesout of bed, they were getting
their kids dressed and packingthe diaper bag, loading up the
stroller into the car, gettingto class on time, you know,
working out their bodies for 45minutes while their kids were
having fun and makingfriendships.
And a lot of these friends, alot of the people that were in
this class, this was like 15, 20years ago.
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They're still friends, and so Imade sure to point out all of
these wins that they werecreating and I wanted to make
sure that they always leftfeeling better than when they
came, and that was just reallyimportant to me.
Also, around this time, myhusband and I started a business
together called Bennett Running.
I know it's like so original,right, but we had day camps, we
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had sleepaway camps for highschoolers co-ed, by the way, a
lot of stress there.
We had community runs, we didprivate coaching.
We put on so many differentkinds of events.
We put on many different kindsof races.
It was a lot of fun and it wasa lot of work.
So my marketing skills cameinto play, because I was always
emailing people about our eventsand getting them to sign up and
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telling them how to sign up,inviting them to all these
different things.
It was a lot of event planning,right.
So we had, you know, planningall of these different events.
We had to make sure that therewas first aid and that there
were, you know, emts on staffand that we had the proper
insurance and that we had funstuff for the kids to do and
that we had water and we hadsnacks and we had t-shirts and
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all the things.
There's so much that goes intoall of these camps and all of
these events.
So I definitely got really goodat event planning and making it
fun.
And you know, it didn't alwayslook cute there's only so much
cuteness you can make at a daycamp for runner, for cross
country runners or something butwe did our best.
I learned how to manage stressand not that I did a great job
about it.
I always felt a lot of stress,especially with our sleepaway
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camps.
So it was co-ed high schoolsleepaway camps for like five
days, six, like six days, fivenights, something like that and
that was really, reallystressful to me because I just
felt like there are so many kidswith their lives in our hands
and I just wanted to make surethat every single thing was like
perfect and in place and I'mhappy to report the only injury
we ever had was somebody chippeda tooth when they tripped on a
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rock.
So I felt really good abouthaving years and years of those
camps with nobody, you know,getting lost, nobody getting
injured, like nothing badhappened.
But one funny thing was one timein the summer, a couple weeks
before the summer camp, thesleepaway camp I had a knock on
the door and I went to the doorand it was a mom and she said,
hi, my, my daughter's gonnaattend your sleepaway camp and
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so was her boyfriend and I justwanted you to promise me that
you won't let her get pregnant.
I was like what is happening?
Why are you on my front porchtelling me to not let your
daughter get pregnant?
But I had so much fear and Iwatched that girl like a hawk
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and her boyfriend and we had alot of really good counselors
that I really respected andtrusted.
But that's so terrifying tohave a mom come to your front
door and plead with you withtears in her like absolute
pleading.
But nobody ever got pregnant atour sleepaway camps either.
So you know I'm calling that awin on so many levels.
But no, that was just kind of afunny story about the stress
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that you have to go through whenyou, when you are hosting these
camps and hosting events forpeople, and not only am I so
concerned about their safety,which is ultimately the most
important, of course, but I'm soalways concerned about their
they're having a fun time.
I want them to feel good aboutthemselves and, again, in all of
our events, we wanted people toleave feeling better about
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themselves than when they came,and so we did.
There were so many things thatwe did and so many mindset tools
that I learned to help peoplefeel better about themselves
than when they came and to helpthem feel successful and
empowered and to help them findtheir wins and celebrate their
wins.
So that was one of the biggestthings that I learned from my
time with Bennett Running.
I also had to really learn alot about being organized.
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So we had, you know, 250 peopleat our camps and all these
people at events and I had tomake sure that everybody there
had a waiver for insurance andyou know that the money was paid
when we rented venues and justso many.
You know contact information,emergency contact information
and so many details to help themknow where to go, at what time
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and what to bring, and so I hadto learn how to be really
organized, and that's when Ibecame very good friends with
Excel and Google Sheets and allthe spreadsheets.
So, yeah, that was where mypassion and love for
spreadsheets happened.
I remember first learning aboutExcel in my marketing major and
journalism major and I rememberthinking like this is terrible,
I'm never going to use this,and I use it all the time now
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for the last, like decades.
So, all right, what else?
What do we have next?
So, also, while Bennett Runningwas going on, I started coaching
moms and the Stroller Stridemoms.
So some of them graduated sortof, and some of them still did
this with their babies, but Istarted coaching them to run
their first 5k.
So most of the moms in my grouphadn't really been runners
before, but since I had been arunner since I was nine, I knew
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a lot about running and so Istarted coaching them and that
was so fun to see these moms gofrom you know zero to 5k, but
they would do these 5k races andnot walk at all in a pretty
short amount of time, and it wasjust so fun.
And a fun fact, one of the momsin that group now does ultra
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marathons, so like more than 100miles or more and she was
actually on my podcast.
I'll link to that episode inthe notes.
But her name is Lisa Devona andshe's been a very successful
ultra marathoner.
So look for that link if you'reinterested in hearing her story
, because it's really cool.
But so I also started coachingin middle school.
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So I wanted my kids to havereally good experiences with
running.
I didn't want them to have.
I didn't want running to be notfun for them, and so I knew
that if I was their coach, thatthey were really going to enjoy
running.
So I also started coaching atthe middle school, and so what I
learned from these coachingexperiences is how to make hard
work fun.
So we did really hard workouts,both with the moms and the
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middle school kids.
We did really hard workouts.
They were age appropriate andthey felt really fun.
And it doesn't mean that we hadto play games.
It just meant that I think thekey to making something fun is
to feel successful at it.
Right, we all want to feelsuccessful at things, and if we
feel successful, we're going tohave fun and we're going to want
to do it more, and so I foundall these different ways to help
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these kids and the moms feelsuccessful and again they left
better.
They left feeling better thanwhen they came to practice.
I also learned a lot aboutherding cats my husband called
it, you know.
He looked at one of mypractices one time and there was
like 65 kids running around andit was very contained chaos.
I knew exactly what was goingon and what they were doing, but
he was like this is literallylike herding cats and it kind of
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was.
But so I learned a lot againabout having my attention be in
all kinds of differentdirections but having it still
all like organized chaos, right,contained chaos.
Okay.
So also around this time, Ireally wanted to get back to
some of the creativity that Ihad stopped doing while I was
doing all of this runningcoaching and all of the running
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event planning.
So I started I wanted to getinto art licensing.
So that means that I wouldcreate art and then I would try
to license it to companies touse on their products.
So anything from shoes tobedding, to stationery, to gift
bags, to wallpaper, to curtains,fabric, anything that you look
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around in your world and seeanything with a print or pattern
on it.
There is a designer somewherethat designed that, and so I
never even knew that that was athing.
But I was making a quilt and Iwas looking at the fabric and
I'm like it dawned on mesomebody designed this, somebody
designed this pattern, and inthat moment I was like I want to
(24:15):
be the person that designs thepatterns for these things.
And so I didn't know anythingabout art.
I'd only taken art, like for ayear, like in sixth grade,
because it was mandatory.
I never thought of myself ascreative or an artist, but I
decided that I wanted to be anartist and I wanted to license
my work, and so I signed up fora quick class online about how
to use Adobe Illustrator, whichis just a program, a software
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program to help you createpatterns, and I decided I was
going to make a repeat patternevery single day.
I think this was in 2011.
My years get all fuzzy, so it'saround 2011.
So I started doing that and Iposted them online a lot.
And then the posting online gotto be too hard and my website
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wouldn't hold all of that manyimages, so I stopped posting
them daily, but I did create atleast one every single day.
And then I entered a fabricdesign competition I think it
was called the Printed Bolt.
It was the repeat competition.
I had no business entering it.
The judges on this were giantsin the industry, but I got
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fourth and I felt really goodabout that and I think what that
taught me is to do thingssometimes before I felt ready.
I am really proud of that skill.
I'm really proud of the gutsthat I have sometimes to just
put myself in the ring beforeI'm even ready there and have
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guts and have faith in myselfthat I'm going to figure it out.
And that's what I did.
So when I applied, I had no, Ihad no expectation that they
were going to even let me in thecompetition and it was sort of
like a project runway way stylecompetition.
So they would give you like abrief, they would tell you what
they wanted, and then you hadlike three days to do it and
then they judged and thensomebody went home and I kept
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making it through, rounds androunds and you know I finally
got out right before the finalthree, which was so
heartbreaking.
I figured it out as I went andI was terrified the whole time.
I mean, I was like my body wasjust going through so much, like
oh my gosh, what is happening?
This was public, it was onblogs, and the humiliation risk
was real.
But I love that I developedthat skill to just put myself
(26:23):
out there, trust that I'm goingto figure it out and figure it
out as I go along.
So that was really important tomy philosophy that I now use
with my coaching.
It also taught me a lot aboutdaily habits.
So I think actually back in2009 is when I started doing
daily habits and I started kindof sketching a little bit every
day.
But having this pattern a daywas pretty time intensive and so
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it just taught me a lot abouthow to keep showing up for
myself, even when I didn't wantto, and it just felt really good
for my brain to know every dayI know that no matter what else
I accomplish, I'm also going toaccomplish doing a pattern on
the computer, and so it justfelt really good.
Then in 2012, I think it was Iwent to Surtex, which is surface
and textile trade show in NewYork.
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It's at the Javits Center.
It happens every year and thisis where artists come and they
have their booths with all oftheir art and then all of the
companies and manufacturers comeand they walk from booth to
booth and they decide whose artthey want to license for their
products.
And I had this dream of workingwith a fabric company to put my
art on fabrics to make, youknow, for quilting fabrics.
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And one of my dream companieswas Wintem Fabrics.
And so just put that aside forjust a minute.
So my booth was a corner booth.
I was right across the aislefrom Kelly Ventura and she was
super sweet, still is supersweet, just had gorgeous
watercolor work, a lot ofwatercolor florals, gorgeous
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work.
And she and I, you know, as youdo when you're at trade shows
and booths and craft fairs andsuch, you get to know the people
around you.
And so we had shared our mutual.
You know, we both had a dreamof working with Wyndham Fabrics
and yourics and licensing ourdesigns.
So the first day of the show itwas a three-day show.
The first day of the show Idon't think I mean hardly
anybody came by my booth andstopped to talk to me and it was
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so demoralizing maybe would bethe right word to stand there on
your feet in heels and a dressand uncomfortable, and is my
makeup melting off and I'mhungry and I have to go to the
bathroom.
But I'm the only person in mybooth.
And what if my dream clientcomes by right when I go to the
bathroom or right when I go geta snack, all of those stresses
of being at a trade show soloand so you know, standing there
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and acting like, oh, I'm sohappy, it's okay that nobody's
stopping at my booth.
And anyway, on the first daymaybe I don't know the first day
or second day this group ofpeople came up to Kelly
Ventura's booth and they stayedfor a while and they were
looking through her stuff andthey signed a contract and they
walked away and I was like whowas that?
And she was like WyndhamFabrics and I was so excited for
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her and she still has fabriccollections with Wyndham today.
She's still putting out fabriccollections with them.
So this has been a very longtime that they've been working
together.
And as I was so excited for herand still am there, was this
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like really sad part of me thatshe got this and I didn't.
And it felt really hard andjoyous at the same time because
I was so happy for her and herwork so deserves it.
And also I think the publichumiliation of it Like for her
and her work so deserves it.
And also I think the publichumiliation of it, like I had
told her that that was my dreamand she got it and I didn't, and
they didn't even glance at mybooth.
I mean, they were notinterested at all and so there
was just the like, the sadnessabout it and that like the
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knowing that she knew that Ididn't get my dream, I think
felt a little bit hard.
So the reason I'm bringing thatup is because I know what it
feels like when my clients areputting themselves out there and
they're scared of humiliation,they're scared of failure,
they're scared of it not workingout, they're scared of looking
dumb, they're scared of peoplenot liking their work.
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I mean I totally, I viscerallyfeel it in my body what it felt
like to be in that booth.
Spoiler alert I ended up comingaway with several licensing
contracts that lasted me yearsand years and that felt really
good.
But I know how it feels tostand in a booth all alone and
have nobody coming and buyingyour work.
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I know how it feels, and so Ithink that has helped me so much
when I work with a lot of mycreative clients that they go to
trade shows or they go to artshows or they're putting
themselves out there and, youknow, applying or submitting
themselves for juriedcompetitions.
I know how it feels to be onthe sort of fail side when it
doesn't work out the way youwant it, and the win side,
(30:43):
because I've had a lot of winsalso.
But I just I know how it feels,I know how much work goes into
it.
So then, after Certex, I camehome, I did all the follow up
and then I went on a mission tojust pitch the heck out of all
the companies I could find.
So anytime I was on a giftstore, if there was like a gift
or some, or fabric, somethingwith a design on it, I would
pick it up and I would look atwho was manufactured by and I
(31:04):
would write it down in a littlenotebook.
And then I would go home and Iwould find the contact
information for that company andI would send them my portfolio
and say, hey, I would reallylove to work with you.
Here's the artwork I haveavailable for licensing.
So I was pitching myself allthe time, and so, again, I was
putting myself up there on thechopping block, right, I was
like, here I am, I'm puttingmyself in the face of rejection,
(31:25):
what are you going to do?
And I got a lot of licensingcontracts that way.
But, again, it taught me somuch about pitching yourself and
believing in yourself and doingit over and over and knowing
that it's a numbers game andthat you are going to get a lot
of no's and you're going to getsome yeses too, if you just keep
putting yourself out there longenough.
Also, around the same time, Istarted the Happy, happy Art
Collective.
So I was in some kind of onlineart class and there were so
(31:51):
many amazing artists that wereworlds above and beyond what I
could ever create in art, and Ireached out to five of them and
I asked them to be in an artcollective with me.
These were women that I admired, these were women whose work I
admired, and they all said yes.
And when I put out the invite,I'm like, oh, they're probably
(32:12):
not going to want to work withme because my work is so much
worse than theirs and they'renot going to want to be
associated with my art, and Ijust had all of these feelings,
insecure feelings, but also thisself-trust, when I was like,
well, the worst that couldhappen is they say no and then
like it's totally fine, right,like maybe I'll be like a little
bit sad for a day and then I'llget over it, I'll move on.
(32:32):
But they all said yes and wehad such a good time.
We would meet online I think itwas Skype back then, I don't
even remember.
I don't feel like Zoom evenexisted back then but we would
meet online and we artist in anart business or any kind of
(33:11):
creative business.
A lot of the work is alone.
A lot of the time you're justspent alone creating your work,
and it's so important to haveother people to connect with.
And so I think I wasn't feelingthat connection and so I
decided I'm going to create it.
I don't feel like I have acommunity.
I don't feel like I have peoplethat understand what it feels
like to submit your work and toget another no and sometimes a
(33:31):
yes, and so I created thatcommunity.
So another thing I learned fromthere is if you don't have what
you want, if you don't have thesupport system that you want,
then go create it, make ithappen for you.
If you know you need connectionand community and support and
network, then go create that foryourself.
It was very easy.
It was a simple email, Okay.
So around that time, like aftera few years of art licensing, I
(33:54):
wanted to branch out on my ownand make my own art.
So what happens in artlicensing is you are at the kind
of direction of the artdirector of the company that is
licensing your work, so theymight come back and tell you can
you take out that font, or canyou use a different font, or can
you use a different blue, orcan you move that bird over to
the other side?
And so you're at their callinga little bit right, like they
(34:18):
know what sells for theirproducts, they know what sells
for their customers, and so youhave to change your artwork
around sometimes, which istotally fine.
But I wanted to have my voiceheard and not have it be edited
or changed, and so I startedTiger Pocket Press, which was my
stationary company.
So I had greeting cards, enamelpins and stickers and notepads,
(34:39):
and that just felt really,really fun.
And so the biggest thing Ilearned there that I now take
into my coaching is how to trustin the creative process and how
to trust in my art and myvision and knowing that there is
someone out there for me.
There will be people who don'tlike my work, but there are
definitely going to be peoplethat do, and I just have to
(34:59):
figure out how to get myself infront of the people that do.
So I went to a trade show againat Javits Center in New York.
It's a national stationery showand it actually happens at the
same time as SurTech.
So I just felt like, oh, fullcircle.
Here I am again.
I met some amazing people.
One of them was Tiffany McGrawof Paper Rehab, and she is also
on a podcast, so I will link toher episode here too.
(35:20):
So I made a lot of goodconnections with other artists
and I made a lot of sales andthat felt really good, and I
want to share a little storywith you here.
So and I might've told thisbefore in another episode, but
I'm going to tell you again so,before I went to the trade show,
I sent out a lot of catalogsand notes and, you know, sample
cards to some of my dream stores.
(35:42):
And I just said you know I'mgoing to be at the National
Stationery Show.
Please come by and visit.
I would love to.
You know, I'd love to meet youand you know here's the cards
for sale.
And I didn't hear back from anyof those stores before the
trade show.
But I had this dream list youknow, like if these people come
by that'd be amazing, and so on.
I don't remember which day itwas.
Again, it was a three day show.
(36:02):
On one of the days, one of mydream stores Gus and Ruby is the
name of the store.
They're in the Northeast, theyhave multiple locations.
They came up to me and theyplaced the largest order I had
ever had to that point and for along time.
After cards and they left andas they were walking away, they
(36:25):
put a checkmark on theirclipboard by my name.
And so what I'm telling youhere is I had these dream stores
.
I reached out and I heardcrickets at first, right before
the trade show, which is common,like people aren't going to
really write out to you before atrade show because they're just
going to come by and visit you.
But the point was I didn't knowif my work was resonating, I
didn't know if people wereinterested in me.
I didn't know if they evenreceived my letter and my sample
(36:46):
package, and then they had ontheir clipboard a list of people
that they wanted to see andorder from, and so my message to
you, if you're listening, ifyou have your own kind of
creative business or any kind ofbusiness where you are doing
sales, is there are people outthere ready to buy from you,
even if it doesn't seem like it,right?
(37:06):
So heading into the show, I washearing crickets, but leaving
the show I had tons of orders,and so just know that your
people, your customers, yourclients are out there watching
you and they just haven't boughtyet.
You just have to keep showingup and getting in front of them
and they will place their order.
These people that want what youhave, they are going to place
(37:28):
the order with you or they aregoing to sign up to work with
you, but you just have to keepshowing up and making it easy
for them, right?
So it was super easy for Gus andRuby to come place an order
with me.
They walked straight up to me,they order, they were in and out
, they crossed me off the listand they were on to the next
because they already knew whatthey wanted.
They already knew they wantedto buy from me and I made it
really easy for them by being ata trade show where a lot of the
(37:49):
other stores, a lot of theother artists that they buy from
, were also located right.
So that became my mantra overthe next year or two, gus and
Ruby, because I started sendingmy workout, samples of my work,
catalogs, emails, all kinds ofthings, and I pitched.
There were months when I wouldpitch about 50 to 100 on a month
(38:10):
and then sometimes I would takea month off and then go again
hard 50 to 100.
So I was constantly puttingmyself out there and sometimes a
week would go by and I wouldhear nothing, crickets, and I
would start to feel discouraged.
And then I reminded myself Gusand Ruby, gus and Ruby, your
people are out there, they'rewatching, they're going to buy
from you.
You just have to keep showingup.
(38:32):
And that really kept me goingfor the next couple years and I
ended up in over 100 independentgift and stationery stores
across the US within the nextyear and that felt really good
to hit that 100 mark in a year,because that was kind of one of
my goals and I did that byhaving faith in myself, that
(38:53):
what I was doing was working,that my art was good enough,
that my marketing was goodenough, and I just kept showing
up over and over and over withthat mantra Gus and Ruby.
So some of the skills I learnedhere.
In addition to that havingtrust in my art, trust in my
vision, trust that my buyers, myclients, customers, were out
there I also learned how tohandle rejection, because I got
a lot of no's.
(39:13):
I think it's about a 2% or 3%conversion rate.
So let's say, if I'm sendingout 100 pitch letters, only 2 or
3 of those typically are goingto turn into customers.
So that's like 97 or 98 no'sthat I'm getting each time.
And so to just keep practicingthat faith in yourself and in
(39:36):
your art and just keep showingup and knowing it's a numbers
game, you just have to keepshowing up.
I also learned a ton aboutinventory, tracking and stocking
and packaging and shipping andall those other things, but I
think the more important thingsare to just learn to keep
showing up and to have thatfaith in yourself and in your
art and in your work, whateverit is that you're doing.
Okay, this is turning into asuper long episode.
(39:58):
I thank you for staying with me.
We're getting near the end.
We're getting really close.
Okay, thank you so much, friend, for still being here.
But so 2015 to 2019 were reallyreally hard years for me
personally.
We moved across the country.
We just had a lot going on.
All this time I was stillcoaching, I was still creating
and selling my products acrossthe US and I started around.
(40:21):
This time I started teachingtiny daily habits.
So I was teaching how to createa tiny daily habit, how to keep
it, and so I started teachingall kinds of workshops.
I was teaching vision boards,tiny daily habits to lots of
different organizations andgroups, and I had accountability
clubs and I was teaching aclass called the Book of Me,
(40:41):
where it's just aboutself-discovery, and I even did
that at some birthday parties.
So I was just testing ideasbasically for different things
to teach and seeing whatresonated with people and what
didn't, and tweaking things andmaking them better.
And so there, I had to learn alot about teaching.
I had to learn a lot aboutmarketing.
I had to learn about how tomake people feel welcome and
(41:02):
safe and excited, to learn andto keep them interested.
So a lot of those skills Istill use, you know, today,
obviously in my coaching and inmy teaching and my speaking
engagements.
And that brings us to thepandemic.
So, sadly, I wasn't able tomeet with my runners in person
anymore, so we weren't, you know, with the quarantine and
(41:22):
everything.
And there were a couple daysduring the pandemic when it was
just getting really discouraging, right when the whole country
was just the whole United Stateswas feeling just kind of low
and isolated.
And there was a day when Ispent like eight or 10 hours
packaging envelopes.
The good news is that I had alot of orders.
(41:43):
The bad news is that it wasjust me, just alone in a room,
putting the envelope with thecard, putting it in a cellophane
package and then packaging themup into shipping containers.
And I just thought I want tohave more of an impact on the
world, on humanity.
I want to connect with peoplemore than just sitting in a room
by myself packing orders foreight to 10 hours.
(42:03):
And so I started reallythinking about how to make a
shift oh, I forgot to say to youlike in 2019, I also started my
.
I started this podcast, the showup society podcast, because I
really wanted to help peoplewith things that I had been
struggling with of how to showup for themselves and how to
break tasks down into tiny steps, and so, while I was kind of
reviewing and revisiting what Iwanted to do with my life, now
(42:29):
that I couldn't, you know, Iwanted to have something where I
could connect with people thatfelt just a little bit more
meaningful and impactful to me.
I decided to use all of thetools that I've used from
everything I've talked about sofar on this podcast to help
people, and so I started taking,I started a certification for
life coaching.
(42:49):
I started coaching my face off,coaching anybody who would let
me coaching all over the place,obviously with consent.
But I asked people like, hey,would you like some free
coaching?
And I did tons and tons of freecoaching, and so then that
brings me to here, where now ithas been years of me being
mindset coach and I've readcountless articles about the
(43:11):
evidence-based mindset tips andtools that I teach.
I am now getting my master'sdegree in sport and performance
psychology to help me be even abetter coach, but I absolutely
love what I do.
I feel like all the things thatI've done have led me to here
and it has all clicked in and Itake things from everything that
I've mentioned to help me be abetter coach and to help people,
(43:34):
and so I feel like none ofthose things was a waste of time
.
None of those things was awaste of money or energy.
I learned so much about myself.
I learned so much about peopleand interaction and sales and
communication.
I learned so much about myself.
I learned so much about peopleand interaction and sales and
communication.
I learned about how to balancetime.
I learned about how to keepthings interesting and how to
(43:54):
listen to people.
I learned how to handlerejection.
I learned how to help peoplefeel successful and not be
afraid of rejection.
I helped people overcomeprocrastination and
perfectionism and I've honed myteaching and speaking and
listening and observing skillsand I help people pitch
themselves and developself-trust.
I'm able to quickly spot aproblem and help people with the
(44:17):
thing that's getting in theirway.
I'm able to find that reallyquickly so we can root it out
and change it.
I'm really good at helpingpeople find focus and
intentional work time and I'mgood at helping people sell and
market and create and interactwith other people.
So all of these skills I'velearned from all the things that
I've done have helped me becomea better coach and they've
(44:39):
helped me build my business, andnow that's what I help people
do, right, and so on next week'sepisode, when I'm talking about
my coaching and what I helpwith and what can happen for
people when they work with me oranother coach, it all comes
from here, right?
It's like all roads lead toRome, like all the things that
(45:00):
I've done have led me to hereand it clicks and it feels so
good to help people in this wayand I feel like I have.
I feel like I'm the luckiestperson in the world and I have
the best job in the worldgetting to work with people and
helping them get over theirblocks and really create the
lives that they want to create.
So I am so grateful to my pastself for doing all of these
(45:23):
different hard, hard things andspending the time and the money
and the energy, even if it's notwhat I do anymore, right?
So I don't practice law, but Iam so grateful to the past me
that went through law schoolbecause it taught me so much
about myself as a person andit's helped me become a way
better coach.
Same thing with all of thebusinesses that I've mentioned.
I am so grateful to past me fordoing all of that work, to
(45:45):
getting me to here.
So if you are somebody thatfeels like you are
multi-passionate ormulti-faceted, and you have many
, many interests and you're notsure which one to choose, my
advice to you is just choose oneand go, do it.
And if you want to then changeyour mind and do something else,
then do that.
But the only way that you'regoing to figure out what really
(46:05):
really lands home for you, whatreally feels good for you, is to
go out and start doing one ofthe things right now, like
literally today.
Just go and choose one of thethings on your list that you
might be interested in and takesome action in that today,
because you're never going tofigure out what feels good to
you until you're actually in it,doing it.
So all the prep, all theresearch in the world is not
(46:27):
going to help you.
The only thing that's going tohelp you decide what you want to
be doing with your wild andprecious life is to go, start
doing a thing and then you canfigure it out Does it feel good,
do you like it or do you not,so thank you for being on this.
This is one of the longerpodcast episodes I've had in a
really long time, but thank youso much for being here and thank
you for showing up to thisepisode of the Show Up Society
(46:49):
podcast.
Now go out there and show upfor yourself.
Hey friend, if you liked thispodcast episode and you want
help applying it to your life soyou can do more of what you
want and feel good while doingit, you're going to love working
with me one-on-one for sixmonths.
I'll help you with strategy andmindset so you can figure out
what you want, make an actionplan, and I'll help you get
(47:10):
unstuck all along the way.
Go to showupsocietycom forward,slash coaching to set up a
consultation to see if we are agood fit for each other.
Oh, hey, loyal podcast listener,thank you for being here all
the way through to the end.
Okay, are you ready for yourassignment?
This is your secret assignment.
(47:30):
So go to Instagram, find me atShow Up Society, find the post
that corresponds to this podcastepisode, and in the comments, I
want you to leave me someemojis of things that you have
done right, so give me a clue asto what different careers or
hobbies or jobs that you've hadthat have led you to be who you
(47:51):
are.
I think it'll be really fun forus to see you know I'll know
that you listened to thispodcast episode and the other
people that have also listenedand they're leaving emojis.
We can all see what each otherhas done and what experiences
we've had.
So I think that will be reallycool to just have our kind of
life history put into pictureform.
So thank you so much for beinghere and I appreciate you.
(48:13):
Have a good day.
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