Dying to Tell You

Alan Watts said "The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance." This week, Cody reminds us that change isn't something we control but how we react to it is.

Without exception, every single guest on Dying To Tell You has come face-to-face with something they neither expected nor wanted. Change has crashed into their lives, shattering their sense of a normal world.

Last week's episod...

Five years cancer-free, Bridget thought she was in the clear — until a scan the day of a minor surgery revealed stage four metastatic breast cancer. A hospice and palliative care nurse practitioner herself, she talks with Cody about the oncologist who told her "we don't talk numbers, we talk living," the financial toll no one warns you about, her faith, and why she's determined to outlive every statistic she's ever been given...

Sitting with someone facing difficulty—an illness, a crisis of any kind, even their own mortality—is in itself difficult. And how we react in those moments can either make it easier for that person, or harder. 

Many times, our instinct is to soothe. And while that's not wrong, the way we go about it might be. 

This week, Cody reflects on something Courtney brought up in last week's episode, when the people aro...

Courtney was in the best shape of her life — and also the most exhausted she'd ever been. Her body had started sending signals that no one, including herself, knew how to read yet. A stroke scare that turned out to be a misdiagnosed migraine. Weeks of worsening symptoms she chalked up to ordinary aches. And then, on a family trip to Mexico, a swollen neck that sent her home and straight into emergency ...

As a palliative care chaplain, Cody has helped hundreds of people transition from life to death. This past week, he faced a different but maybe more relatable situation for the majority of us—his dog died. And as he and his wife sat on the floor and helped their dog through his final moments, they told him, "Good job." 

We should all be so lucky.

In this week's reflection, Cody talks about his conversation with Jonathan ...

Jonathan Pascual is a lung transplant nurse practitioner and 16-time Ironman finisher who's spent years helping other people through the end of their lives. Now, three and a half years into his own terminal diagnosis, he's still training, still racing — including a finish at the Ironman World Championship in Kona. Movement is his medicine, and stoic philosophy is his compass. Join Cody for a conversation about clarity, defian...

Nobody turns to their car for comfort. Nobody's pain is eased by holding a wad of cash. Especially in times of challenge, all we have is each other.

Cody's deeply personal reflection this week points to this critical fact of life. We see this so movingly in MaRee's kids coming together to support her as she sold her house and became the wandering mom with ALS, welcome in every home, supported at every turn. 

And Cody himself s...

It took MaRee two full years to figure out what was happening to her body, and at the end of that frustrating journey she faced the one diagnosis she most feared — ALS.

Maybe because of the severity of that diagnosis. Maybe because she's a hospice nurse of 17 years who's cared for ALS patients and knows what's coming. Or maybe because she simply is who she is. Wha...

Why? The shortest, most impossible question. 

The ironies and injustices of terminal diagnoses seem impossible to reconcile. They came up in last week's episode as we talked with Ross, who went from expert to patient in the space of four days.

Cody reflects on not just that but also on what we can do when we face these kinds of unanswerable questions. And the one thing he finds we can do is kindness. We can be kind. And for pe...

Who better to get lung cancer than one of the world’s leading experts on lung cancer?

Admittedly, the word “better” is not really right here. But this is essentially what we heard from Dr. Ross Camidge when he sat down to talk with Cody for this week’s episode.

Ross is a global expert in his field, the doctor other doctors go to. In 2022...

Difficult situations can either harden our hearts or open them. And generosity is a choice that each of us can make to resist hardening ourselves, to instead soften and be a safe place for others who might be feeling vulnerable and in need.

Join Cody for this week's reflection on generosity and softening our hearts in the face of difficulty, thoughts inspired by his conversation last week with Jody.

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Jody Gelb had a calm, healthy pregnancy — and then, in the span of a single hospital stay, everything changed. A rushed delivery. Forceps. A baby who wasn't breathing. An emergency trip to the NICU before Jody had even held her daughter.

Days later, a nurse handed her the poem "Welcome to Holla...

Sometimes it takes the unexpected—even the unwanted—to remind us of the extraordinary experience of living. 

In our first Reflection of Season 4, Cody shares his thoughts on his conversation with Keaton, a young father who was living what he called an "ordinary life" until his diagnosis of cancer. Listen to Keaton's full story here or on dttypodcast.com. 

Be sure to join our community on Patreon for free at pa...

At 35, Keaton was an "average guy" — husband, dad to a two-year-old, into cooking and woodworking — until a routine ER visit found tumors on his liver. Now living with intrahepatic cholangiocarcinoma, Keaton talks with Cody about what it took to get his doctors to listen, the loneliness of "cancer planet," and chasing a shot at a liver transplant — all while training to climb Mount Rainier for cancer research.

Kea...

As we get ready to start Season 4 of Dying To Tell You (next week!), we wanted to share with you the first episode of each preceding season. Our final encore episode this week is Sue. 

In this first episode from Season 3, Sue shares her beautiful story with us all the way from Melbourne, Australia. She found us through the podcast Chris produces for Sounds True, "Insights At The Edge." (Thank you again,...

As we get ready to start Season 4 of Dying To Tell You (can you believe it?), we wanted to share with you the first episode of each preceding season. This week is Aimee, who kicked off Season 2. 

Aimee is the daughter of Linda, who was a guest of the show in Season 1. As Linda approached the end of her life, she chose M.A.I.D. (Medial Aid In Dying), which is legal in Colorado. With the approval of her healthcare team, Linda de...

As we get ready to start Season 4 of Dying To Tell You (can you believe it?), we wanted to share with you the first episode of each preceding season, starting with the man who started it all—Aaron. 

If you're not familiar with Aaron's story, we were connected with him before the pandemic as a possible first guest for this show. And of course, we had to put everything on hold while the planet shut down. But then we reconn...

Dying To Tell You is a weekly podcast about death, dying, and life. Palliative Care Chaplain Cody Hufstedler sits down with people living with terminal illness for intimate conversations exploring how facing our finish line brings clarity, wisdom, even joy. Join these people who are facing everything from cancer and ALS to Alzheimer’s and rare diseases to hear wonderfully insightful explorations of lif...

In our last reflection of the season, Cody looks back on his conversation with Clara as well as the entire congregation of guests we were honored to talk with over the past year. Clara's statement that cancer takes and takes and takes but it also gives inspired this meditation on flexibility, multiple truths, and staying open to whatever comes our way. 

Thank you for listening to the stories of our guests this season. We are m...