March 19, 2025 • 10 mins
On this episode of The Thought Shower, Intern John talksa bout how to know if the person you date is a loser
Intern John's debut comedy album "The Album" is available right NOW! InternJohnComedy.com proceeds benefitting the Fisher House Foundation
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com
Intern John's debut comedy album "The Album" is available right NOW! InternJohnComedy.com proceeds benefitting the Fisher House Foundation
Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
And a happy Wednesday. Friend.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Welcome to the Thought Shower. Intern John is my name.
It's been a week in the DC area allergy season
starting again. It's funny because I always kind of convinced
myself I don't have allergies, and then it comes around
and like today, it's the feeling of like my eyes
(00:22):
have been scrubbed with sandpaper, which is fantastic.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Guy running nose a little bit.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Also, I've been somewhat coughing for like a week and
a half, two weeks, which I also think is because
of stock like an old person, because of the weather changing.
Will I survive hopefully well, I can plain by it
absolutely well. I can play about on here, already done that. Yeah,
it's not great. It's not vibe. I got my car
(00:48):
washed last Friday that already looks like Shrek sneezed on it,
So that's not great. I got most of my life
out allergies, and I know, like people say, like your
allergies change every six years. We need to hurry it
up because daddy on life being uncomfortable. Yeah, a big
day for me today. So the Fisher House, who, if
(01:11):
you don't know, didn't my comedy tours to raise money
for them. They have houses on military basis. They make
sure the military families have a place to stay while
their loved one gets medical treatment. With the comedy tours,
we raise over one hundred thousand dollars for them, which
is crazy. They're having a big kind of gallat to
night downtown because they opened up their one hundredth houths,
(01:35):
which is very exciting. So I'm gonna do that tonight tomorrow,
going to a Caps game Friday, hopefully nothing. It's getting
to be busy. I've been trying to dial back on
stuff and you know, relax. Unfortunately your boys, he's in need.
Can't say even want right, your boys in high demand?
Speaker 1 (01:55):
There it is. I can't see your boys and want.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
That makes it sound like I routed a bank something
like that, So ask me today and tomorrow. It's also
been nice too because Skittles and I have been going
on for walks the last couple of days. He's having
a great time. So that's that's my life at nutshell.
And let me get to this for you. Wednesday started
at Boma nos As. I was talking about allergies. How
(02:18):
to know the person you're dating is a bit of
a loser. It's a bit tough. It's a bit tough.
But they're saying, if this is the person that they're
not ready or willing to build a kind of life
that you want, here's what to look for. And more so,
if they're in their thirties and still figuring it out, well,
here's the thing with that. They say, No one expects
(02:39):
a thirty something year old to have it completely nailed down.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
God knows this, one doesn't.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
But there's a difference between still chasing dreams and just
floating aimlessly. If they're hopping from John job or still
talking about finding themselves actively taking action, it's a red flag.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
I think that's fair.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
I do think if somebody is taking action, they are
trying to do things and they are know whether it
be through therapy or like they have goals or following through,
that's one thing. Yeah, because to their point, you're not
just then floating around trying to figure things out. If
they always have big ideas but never follow through, they
say dreaming big is attractive till you realize is I'll
(03:18):
talk and no action. If they're constantly brainstorming the next
big thing but can't seem the follow through on anything,
it's a problem. This is one of my biggest like
pet peeves in the creative space, in the workspace is
sometimes it feels like somebody, yeah, they just have a
million ideas, but never an idea of how to put
those ideas in action.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
You know.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
I always tell people with like work stuff, it's like
you know, Saturday Night Live every Monday, they have their
pitch meeting where people have like, you know, ideas for
sketches for the week, but they're all the way thought out.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
You know.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
The example I use with the radio stations, like if
I was if somebody came to me it was like, hey,
what if we did a thing in the show where
you guys catch people who are cheating and they just
left it like that. Yeah, I mean that's that's not
like a full idea flo ideas like we call it
War of the Roses. We do your X, Y, Z
and Z, and it's like it's thought out step by
(04:14):
step where it's like.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Okay, I can get behind that.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
If they have a SOB story for all of for
why life sucks, they say we all have challenges, but
their entire personality revolves around blaming the world for their problems.
That's a major red flag, and whether it's their parents'
ex bad luck. Yeah, they say, empathy is one thing,
but there's a big difference between someone who's working through
issues and someone who's constantly trying to content with wallowing
(04:39):
in them. I think that's true because also that with
that say, there's nothing you can do to bring that
person ETI their slump, and that's not fair to you.
It's not your job to be somebody's soul source of happiness.
I wholeheart. I believe that. I said that with an
X before. It's like, I can't be your full sort
(04:59):
of happiness for one thing. That's a lot to put
on me, right, if there has to be something else
in your life that gives you happy besides me, because
God knows, sometimes I can barely do with myself, let
alone somebody else. You know. If their social life is lackluster,
they say, if their social calendar is empty, it might
be more than just an introverted phase. They say, not
(05:21):
everyone's social butterfly, but healthy relationships also affect a well
rounded life. If they're burn bridges or can't maintain friendships,
ask why I do think that's true? Obviously, if it's
always them that's causing the problem too. I think that's
a sign big things to come. No doubt they're fine
(05:41):
with having a dead end job. I don't know about this.
They say, not everyone needs to chase a high power career,
but if they're content in a job but no future,
that's a big rid flag.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
They say.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
Ambition doesn't mean a corporate ladder climbing. It just means
caring about growth, financial security, and contributing to life they want.
I would add this, as long as your bills are paid,
I think that's fine.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
It could be a debt end job.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
But as long as you are fulfilled in that job,
maybe there isn't a chance for growth at that job. Right,
But as long as like you're happy and you feel
like you're doing something that makes you happy, to me,
it doesn't quite make a difference. I'm gonna be different
if I guess a bad way of saying this, because
me just kind of feels like a mindset, right or
(06:31):
if you're content and happy, you're going to go. But
if you're not happy and then you're a dead end job,
it's like you know it's not gonna make you happy,
and you're staying there. That's problems that your person is
gonna have to deal with. That's no fun. If they're
always about to get their life together but never do.
If they've been about to start saving, about to look
for about a job, about to start the dream project
(06:52):
for the last five years, it's time to accept the
about The about team might mean never.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I think that's very fair.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
They say consistent fascination, it's just avoidance with they pretty label.
I think everybody in their life knows somebody who's about
to figure it out, about to get something going, and
yeah it is. It is kind of like you want
the best of that person. You want them to eventually
figure it out. However, at some point it's like I can't.
You can't keep waiting, you know, if they've been working
(07:21):
on project for years with nothing to show, say, passion
projects are great unless they're a cover for laziness. If
they've just been quote working on a book a business
created project for years, no real progress, it's time to
ask if it's an actual goal or a convene excuse
to do nothing. I think that's very true. I think
because with something like that, it's pretty obvious if you've
(07:41):
made progress on it. I think everybody has, yeah that
he had somebody who it's like they've been working on
starting their website or their side business.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
I understand that it can be.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Difficult to were but yeah, but for me, it's always
like once it gets started on a project, I feel
like it gets a lot easier. And I know that
sounds so stupid to sail loud, but it's like with
my taxes this past weekend, it was like, once I
sat down to start it, it came did I want
to do it?
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Hell no?
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Hell no. If they complain about their exes, they say,
if they constantly badmouth their axes, that's not just the
red flag, it's a siren. H Everyone has a part,
but if their stories are full of baredness and blame,
it says more about them than the people they dated.
Says the shows they haven't learned from their experiences and
aren't willing to take responsibility for the part and the
(08:34):
fail relationship. I would also add this that for me,
it's like as things move on, and like as time
moves on, it's hard to stay mad at people. So
if you can stay mad with people for a long time,
to me, it's like you're always thinking about it. You know,
I believe in the out of sight, out of mind.
You know, the last one I'll get to. They show
(08:57):
zero interest in improving themselves. This's a weird one, right,
because I do think it's like, if you have a
chance to be a better person, why would you not
want to do that? Chance to get better, make yourself better?
Why would you want to do that? They say growth
is key or any relationship. If they're content stating exactly
the same with no interest in learning, evolving and becoming better,
it's a serious issue of being stagnisifying for a while,
(09:20):
but long term it breathes resentment and dissatisfaction. I think
it's kind of a scary point too, if you're with
somebody for years and they're the exact same person when
you started dating, like they haven't improved. It's like, well,
think of any business. If the iPhone hadn't improved from
the first one, would it still be around? Probably not,
although I'll be honest, last couple ones you look exactly
(09:43):
the same. Just gonna throw it out there. Hope you
have a great Wednesday. You can find me at intern
Genre Radio on everything. Appreciate you listening, Appreciate you hanging
out friend. This is the thought shower. I will see
you on Friday.
And a happy Wednesday. Friend.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Welcome to the Thought Shower. Intern John is my name.
It's been a week in the DC area allergy season
starting again. It's funny because I always kind of convinced
myself I don't have allergies, and then it comes around
and like today, it's the feeling of like my eyes
(00:22):
have been scrubbed with sandpaper, which is fantastic.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Guy running nose a little bit.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Also, I've been somewhat coughing for like a week and
a half, two weeks, which I also think is because
of stock like an old person, because of the weather changing.
Will I survive hopefully well, I can plain by it
absolutely well. I can play about on here, already done that. Yeah,
it's not great. It's not vibe. I got my car
(00:48):
washed last Friday that already looks like Shrek sneezed on it,
So that's not great. I got most of my life
out allergies, and I know, like people say, like your
allergies change every six years. We need to hurry it
up because daddy on life being uncomfortable. Yeah, a big
day for me today. So the Fisher House, who, if
(01:11):
you don't know, didn't my comedy tours to raise money
for them. They have houses on military basis. They make
sure the military families have a place to stay while
their loved one gets medical treatment. With the comedy tours,
we raise over one hundred thousand dollars for them, which
is crazy. They're having a big kind of gallat to
night downtown because they opened up their one hundredth houths,
(01:35):
which is very exciting. So I'm gonna do that tonight tomorrow,
going to a Caps game Friday, hopefully nothing. It's getting
to be busy. I've been trying to dial back on
stuff and you know, relax. Unfortunately your boys, he's in need.
Can't say even want right, your boys in high demand?
Speaker 1 (01:55):
There it is. I can't see your boys and want.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
That makes it sound like I routed a bank something
like that, So ask me today and tomorrow. It's also
been nice too because Skittles and I have been going
on for walks the last couple of days. He's having
a great time. So that's that's my life at nutshell.
And let me get to this for you. Wednesday started
at Boma nos As. I was talking about allergies. How
(02:18):
to know the person you're dating is a bit of
a loser. It's a bit tough. It's a bit tough.
But they're saying, if this is the person that they're
not ready or willing to build a kind of life
that you want, here's what to look for. And more so,
if they're in their thirties and still figuring it out, well,
here's the thing with that. They say, No one expects
(02:39):
a thirty something year old to have it completely nailed down.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
God knows this, one doesn't.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
But there's a difference between still chasing dreams and just
floating aimlessly. If they're hopping from John job or still
talking about finding themselves actively taking action, it's a red flag.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
I think that's fair.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
I do think if somebody is taking action, they are
trying to do things and they are know whether it
be through therapy or like they have goals or following through,
that's one thing. Yeah, because to their point, you're not
just then floating around trying to figure things out. If
they always have big ideas but never follow through, they
say dreaming big is attractive till you realize is I'll
(03:18):
talk and no action. If they're constantly brainstorming the next
big thing but can't seem the follow through on anything,
it's a problem. This is one of my biggest like
pet peeves in the creative space, in the workspace is
sometimes it feels like somebody, yeah, they just have a
million ideas, but never an idea of how to put
those ideas in action.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
You know.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
I always tell people with like work stuff, it's like
you know, Saturday Night Live every Monday, they have their
pitch meeting where people have like, you know, ideas for
sketches for the week, but they're all the way thought out.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
You know.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
The example I use with the radio stations, like if
I was if somebody came to me it was like, hey,
what if we did a thing in the show where
you guys catch people who are cheating and they just
left it like that. Yeah, I mean that's that's not
like a full idea flo ideas like we call it
War of the Roses. We do your X, Y, Z
and Z, and it's like it's thought out step by
(04:14):
step where it's like.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Okay, I can get behind that.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
If they have a SOB story for all of for
why life sucks, they say we all have challenges, but
their entire personality revolves around blaming the world for their problems.
That's a major red flag, and whether it's their parents'
ex bad luck. Yeah, they say, empathy is one thing,
but there's a big difference between someone who's working through
issues and someone who's constantly trying to content with wallowing
(04:39):
in them. I think that's true because also that with
that say, there's nothing you can do to bring that
person ETI their slump, and that's not fair to you.
It's not your job to be somebody's soul source of happiness.
I wholeheart. I believe that. I said that with an
X before. It's like, I can't be your full sort
(04:59):
of happiness for one thing. That's a lot to put
on me, right, if there has to be something else
in your life that gives you happy besides me, because
God knows, sometimes I can barely do with myself, let
alone somebody else. You know. If their social life is lackluster,
they say, if their social calendar is empty, it might
be more than just an introverted phase. They say, not
(05:21):
everyone's social butterfly, but healthy relationships also affect a well
rounded life. If they're burn bridges or can't maintain friendships,
ask why I do think that's true? Obviously, if it's
always them that's causing the problem too. I think that's
a sign big things to come. No doubt they're fine
(05:41):
with having a dead end job. I don't know about this.
They say, not everyone needs to chase a high power career,
but if they're content in a job but no future,
that's a big rid flag.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
They say.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
Ambition doesn't mean a corporate ladder climbing. It just means
caring about growth, financial security, and contributing to life they want.
I would add this, as long as your bills are paid,
I think that's fine.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
It could be a debt end job.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
But as long as you are fulfilled in that job,
maybe there isn't a chance for growth at that job. Right,
But as long as like you're happy and you feel
like you're doing something that makes you happy, to me,
it doesn't quite make a difference. I'm gonna be different
if I guess a bad way of saying this, because
me just kind of feels like a mindset, right or
(06:31):
if you're content and happy, you're going to go. But
if you're not happy and then you're a dead end job,
it's like you know it's not gonna make you happy,
and you're staying there. That's problems that your person is
gonna have to deal with. That's no fun. If they're
always about to get their life together but never do.
If they've been about to start saving, about to look
for about a job, about to start the dream project
(06:52):
for the last five years, it's time to accept the
about The about team might mean never.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I think that's very fair.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
They say consistent fascination, it's just avoidance with they pretty label.
I think everybody in their life knows somebody who's about
to figure it out, about to get something going, and
yeah it is. It is kind of like you want
the best of that person. You want them to eventually
figure it out. However, at some point it's like I can't.
You can't keep waiting, you know, if they've been working
(07:21):
on project for years with nothing to show, say, passion
projects are great unless they're a cover for laziness. If
they've just been quote working on a book a business
created project for years, no real progress, it's time to
ask if it's an actual goal or a convene excuse
to do nothing. I think that's very true. I think
because with something like that, it's pretty obvious if you've
(07:41):
made progress on it. I think everybody has, yeah that
he had somebody who it's like they've been working on
starting their website or their side business.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
I understand that it can be.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Difficult to were but yeah, but for me, it's always
like once it gets started on a project, I feel
like it gets a lot easier. And I know that
sounds so stupid to sail loud, but it's like with
my taxes this past weekend, it was like, once I
sat down to start it, it came did I want
to do it?
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Hell no?
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Hell no. If they complain about their exes, they say,
if they constantly badmouth their axes, that's not just the
red flag, it's a siren. H Everyone has a part,
but if their stories are full of baredness and blame,
it says more about them than the people they dated.
Says the shows they haven't learned from their experiences and
aren't willing to take responsibility for the part and the
(08:34):
fail relationship. I would also add this that for me,
it's like as things move on, and like as time
moves on, it's hard to stay mad at people. So
if you can stay mad with people for a long time,
to me, it's like you're always thinking about it. You know,
I believe in the out of sight, out of mind.
You know, the last one I'll get to. They show
(08:57):
zero interest in improving themselves. This's a weird one, right,
because I do think it's like, if you have a
chance to be a better person, why would you not
want to do that? Chance to get better, make yourself better?
Why would you want to do that? They say growth
is key or any relationship. If they're content stating exactly
the same with no interest in learning, evolving and becoming better,
it's a serious issue of being stagnisifying for a while,
(09:20):
but long term it breathes resentment and dissatisfaction. I think
it's kind of a scary point too, if you're with
somebody for years and they're the exact same person when
you started dating, like they haven't improved. It's like, well,
think of any business. If the iPhone hadn't improved from
the first one, would it still be around? Probably not,
although I'll be honest, last couple ones you look exactly
(09:43):
the same. Just gonna throw it out there. Hope you
have a great Wednesday. You can find me at intern
Genre Radio on everything. Appreciate you listening, Appreciate you hanging
out friend. This is the thought shower. I will see
you on Friday.
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