The Matt & Jerry Show, For One last Time.

This is it! Matt Heath & Jeremy Wells take to the mic for one final Matt & Jerry Show...

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello you great New Zealanders. Matt Heath here. This is
my last week on this podcast sadly, but if you're
not sick of me and you want more of my
weekly content, you can follow my weekly Substack mailout article
at Matdheath dot substack dot com. This week I discussed
fighting fomo after my friends betrayed me and went to
Germany without me. It's you, Jerry, g Lane, Joseph and Minia.

(00:23):
I love you, but you hurt me. Anyway you seem busy,
I'll let you go to Mattheath dot substack dot com.
Bless Bless, Blessed.

Speaker 2 (00:29):
The Mat and Jerry Show. Load up on landscaping with
Bunnings Trade.

Speaker 3 (00:35):
I've got a really big announcement.

Speaker 4 (00:37):
I guess you just have to rip the band aid off?

Speaker 2 (00:39):
Did you pay for this? Unregistered?

Speaker 1 (00:40):
Guest last night called it rather for the master, the
meaning I had better get home or a sup hell becold?

Speaker 2 (00:45):
Yep.

Speaker 4 (00:46):
Now we got to honest, junkie.

Speaker 3 (00:47):
This is an important one.

Speaker 4 (00:48):
Do you from your downstairs start discuss today. I'll tell
you what it's saying. It's quite sirtual at the moment.
And do you drink what I give you?

Speaker 2 (00:56):
Boy?

Speaker 4 (00:56):
What's wrong with you?

Speaker 1 (00:57):
Would I start tonight?

Speaker 4 (00:58):
After ten years on the Mat.

Speaker 1 (01:00):
Jerry brief the show, I'm leaving the show.

Speaker 2 (01:04):
Well, Welcome along to the Mad and Jerry Show, the
last ever Matt and Jerry Show, Matt's last day on
Radio Hurdacky. Today was celebrating Matt's fourteen years here at
Radio Hadicky and eleven years of the Matt and Jerry Show.
Welcome along Matt Big day to day.

Speaker 1 (01:25):
Sorry I was late this morning. I had an absolute
nightmare in the laundry like.

Speaker 5 (01:31):
An app.

Speaker 1 (01:32):
I didn't know this thing happened, but everyone must know.
This thing to do with washing machines.

Speaker 5 (01:38):
Okay, you're going to tell us now, you're going to
tell us in a bit.

Speaker 1 (01:40):
Do you think maybe I'll tell you in a bit. Okay,
But I've been dealing with just a crazy situation this morning.

Speaker 2 (01:47):
So you're a radio professional to the end. I mean,
what you've done is you've come out at firstly, you've
arrived on time. You weren't.

Speaker 1 (01:53):
You've arrived, you've arrived.

Speaker 2 (01:54):
With just seconds to go, perfect, perfect time. And what
a professional with a story, and then you've teased it
to finished break. I mean a professional right until the end.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
Yeah, I pushed it to the last minute, trying to
fight this disaster.

Speaker 2 (02:13):
A great thing was the boss here at Indied Me
came down to say congratulations and have a good show, Boxy,
and you weren't.

Speaker 1 (02:18):
Here, which was great, And I think that's how I've
been running the cart of the whole time. It's perfect.

Speaker 2 (02:27):
Cheers, Welcome along to the last ever Manton Jerry.

Speaker 6 (02:30):
Show, The Mat and Jerry Show podcast that is the
New Radicals.

Speaker 2 (02:35):
You get what you give. You've been trying to play
that song, Yeah, for the last eleven years.

Speaker 1 (02:39):
I've been pressuring various pds to add that to the playlist.
But I just love that song.

Speaker 5 (02:45):
I don't know why.

Speaker 1 (02:46):
I mean, it's probably a bit of a wounder of
a song in some ways, but it's just so upbeat.
It just makes me happy.

Speaker 5 (02:52):
If you Canno tell people, I'd appreciate it. I slipped
that in there, that's right, I thought. Yeah, I kind
of feel like that's our almost show song because we
all have slightly different music to here on the Managery Show,
you boys, especially from from from Mine, but that is
the one song that will always play wherever we are,
and all three of us will always go oh tune.

Speaker 1 (03:08):
Yeah, we that songs we played before dejah Voodo went
on stage, much to the chagrin of the other people
in my band, which run to run a bit of
a credible line.

Speaker 2 (03:17):
I'm like, did you you played that before dejah Voodoo?

Speaker 1 (03:20):
Yeah? Like I said, I do the playlist between bands
before we go on, between the you know, support acts
and stuff that's really funny that would be that would
be on. It was like, they're gone. You're like, it's good,
it's so great.

Speaker 2 (03:34):
It's a positive song because it was a Motor's ad,
wasn't it.

Speaker 1 (03:38):
Yeah, that's what I found. That's how I discovered. I
discover all my favorite songs on commercials.

Speaker 2 (03:43):
Yeah, so you're saying before, Matt, you this is brilliant.
On the last day here, you arrived bang on the
money on sex like a professional. You came with a
story about why you came. What you say is a
little bit late, but I mean, you know, because we
normally get here a little bit before the show, and
you said that there was a story, this is a
reason why I'm why I'm late. And then not only

(04:06):
did you then tell us that, but then you teased
it and then held it over into the next break.
That is a true breakfast radio professional right there.

Speaker 1 (04:13):
But is this story good enough for primetime?

Speaker 2 (04:16):
Oh? There we go?

Speaker 1 (04:17):
Do we hold it over till after eight?

Speaker 2 (04:19):
There we go? You see, eleven years ago, when we
started the Mat and Jewis Show, you would have come
out and you would have blurted that story up first thing.
You would have said it straight away. But over the years,
that shows your development as a radio breakfast personality.

Speaker 1 (04:31):
Yeah, but I've got a problem my personality that now
it's been overhyped and I don't want to tell it.

Speaker 2 (04:37):
It's part of you. That's the art. Later on in
primetime we can talk a little bit about the Mat
and Jury show. We start off with an idea that
we're really really excited about.

Speaker 1 (04:48):
And then we get everyone on board.

Speaker 2 (04:50):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (04:50):
And then we gets excited. They rally behind us, they
put all the bits and place to do it. People
sell it, they sell it, they sell it to a sponsor.
Everyone's excited as we were when we delivered it to
the and then.

Speaker 2 (05:00):
And then we've lost interests.

Speaker 1 (05:02):
We've lost interest and we feel set upon like they
came up with the idea and they're forcing us to
do it, and.

Speaker 2 (05:06):
Then by the end of it, we can't stand the
idea and we never said.

Speaker 1 (05:09):
It, and we derail it.

Speaker 7 (05:14):
That's the arc. Oh man, good, I'll miss that art.
I'll miss that arc. That happens every single time. Not
a huge attention spent.

Speaker 2 (05:31):
Here's another song that you love.

Speaker 6 (05:33):
I love a some The Mat and Jerry Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (05:36):
It's been having I'm a Matten Jerry Show. The last
ever met In Jerry show ever fourteen minutes past sucks.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
Hey, so do you want to hear him?

Speaker 2 (05:43):
Why?

Speaker 1 (05:43):
I was almost late today? Wow, we dream for the
first time and eleven years I was almost late. And
you know what I did? You know that you have
to clean your washing machine, Like not just clean the
washing in the washing machine, you have to clean the
washing machine. Well, yeah, did you know that measure?

Speaker 2 (06:04):
No?

Speaker 1 (06:04):
I didn't know that because so I'm looking this morning.
I think there's a major sewage leak in the in
the house, like a major sewage leak. The whole place
fricking stinks. Oh no, And I'm snuffing around going, oh no,
there is sewage billowing out into this place like this
is a disaster. I'm like, you know, you get this
snuff and it's really we don't have a great sense

(06:25):
of smell humans like dogs can can we can there's
a smell, we find it hard to follow it to
the source, you know, like visually we can follow like
a smoke trail to the source, but we can't float,
you know, like in a cartoon when when that cartoon
animals smells a check and they'll float over to it.

Speaker 5 (06:42):
So always your immediate thoughts when you work up this
morning and smell some sewage, you kind of you lift
up the douvet and go, hang on, I've just been
twenty four hours in christ jew is its something going
wrong here?

Speaker 1 (06:53):
Assumed? Yeah, that was running another Dutch of it. But no,
I'm like, there's there's a sewage And I'm like, this
is such a lot of Edmund to deal with. I
was just thinking. I started thinking, I'm glad I wrote
a book on these things to to just face things
that happen as challenges and go can I beat this challenge?
As opposed to I used to just go oh god,
ah man, And I'm like, okay, there's a challenge. Okay,

(07:16):
the universe is testing me. There's a massive sewage leak
just before my last my last day on the Mat
and Jerry Breakfast Show and Radio Headache. And so I
sniffed around and eventually found it in the laundry, and
I was like, oh my god, how's the sewage backing
up from toilets into the into the laundry. But then
I start snuffing around the washing machine.

Speaker 2 (07:38):
Are you actually snuffing? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (07:43):
But also making this snuffing.

Speaker 2 (07:47):
Frantically.

Speaker 1 (07:48):
It's goes, well, you don't need to make the noise.
I'm going, you don't need to you can just you
don't need to go.

Speaker 2 (07:56):
Anyway.

Speaker 1 (07:57):
I sniff around and then I find a part of
the washing machine is like this this filter bit. I
know in the dryer that you have to take the
filter out and change the fluff, but there's like a
filter in the tube of the washing machine, and I'm
sniffing close to that.

Speaker 2 (08:13):
I go, oh God.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
And then I open it and it's got these It's
just full of this disgusting gunge and the gunges in
three It's like that the filter runs in three rows,
so it's like these three big slithers of disgusting gungs
that when I smelt it made me want to vomit,

(08:36):
and then so I rushed outside.

Speaker 2 (08:38):
With the hose.

Speaker 1 (08:39):
I'm hosing there down in the backyard, and then I
go back in. I look at the instructions of the
washing machine online. It's got tub hygiene and there's a
button called tub hygiene. Yes, and there's a whole thing
about how you have to change this filter in the
button that's like ten years. I didn't know that of
disgusting gunge that's been built for the duration pretty much

(09:01):
of this breakfast show.

Speaker 2 (09:03):
Wow, but.

Speaker 1 (09:07):
It's a metaphor the grandfather's clock stop shorting, never to
go again. The guns just overflow to the point where
the how stunk on the day of my last breakfast show.

Speaker 2 (09:20):
Well, that's what you've done to this radio session, except the.

Speaker 1 (09:23):
Gue that's been cleaned out of this break this radio station.

Speaker 2 (09:26):
We've been cleaning the filter the whole time. We haven't
realized that, but we've been. You've been creating the you've
been creating the guns.

Speaker 1 (09:32):
I've been accuse of having no filter on the years.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
We've been secretly cleaning the guch.

Speaker 1 (09:40):
Did anyone else know about this buddy washing machine that
you have to clean the gunge? There's a button on
the it's like, way down under all the other things,
is one that says tubi.

Speaker 2 (09:49):
G Yeah, that's right. Yeah, because it cleans. There's a
drum drum cleaning button.

Speaker 1 (09:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yeah, I did know about it, but the gunge part
about it. I didn't know about the gunge.

Speaker 1 (10:00):
If you don't do it for ten years and you
know you've got a family and you're running so much
washing through it, it'll eventually backfire and you stink like sew.

Speaker 2 (10:08):
And this is great. Maybe every day on the fourth
of October we should have you should remember to clean
your filter. There should be there should be washing machine
filter cleaning day. The last every day of the Matten
Jerry Show was Ontober fourth, and this is the day
that you do it. On October fourth, This is the
day to remember to do it. And that way you
remember the crap that came out of the show.

Speaker 1 (10:28):
We live in a simulation and this is a powerful metaphor.
This is a powerful metaphor.

Speaker 2 (10:32):
Matt and Jerry Show Radio had.

Speaker 6 (10:49):
The Matt and Jerry Show podcast.

Speaker 1 (10:52):
Lucky just Lucky, Bloody comes waltzing through the door.

Speaker 2 (10:59):
Into the one from one end of the day to
the other like Moangue.

Speaker 1 (11:02):
From the bloody cat brag.

Speaker 2 (11:04):
Then that's a good fresh from fresh from the gym.
Probably some turn at the gym, by the looks of it.
I just got up.

Speaker 8 (11:12):
I just got up and I rolled in here. I
was going to go to the gym, but it was
too early. I'm going to go after this. I thought,
we can have sort of twenty to thirty beers here
and then we'll head over to the gym. It's always
good at the gym when you're sort of you lose
your coordination a little bit. Yeah, I goes, you're into it.
You're still there though, obviously, Yeah mate, yeah, yeah, yeah,
still you've turned up.

Speaker 1 (11:33):
When I was doing that five k a day run
for a whole year, i'd often realize that the pub
at some point that I hadn't I said I was
going to write five K day every day, and then
you be at the pub and you'd be like absolutely
steamed in a pair of jandles and you're like, oh
my god, Yeah, it's it's eleven fifteen pm and I've
got to run five k before the end of the day. Boy,
you can. Yeah, the ACC doesn't like you when you

(11:55):
run drunks all hell and a pair of flip fops.

Speaker 8 (11:57):
That's a great example of an addictive personality. You've got
doing good things and then things when you're at the
pub on the hammer, and then you're a psychopath for
still doing good things for yourself and you go up.

Speaker 1 (12:08):
For a run. I think that makes that that's worse
for you.

Speaker 2 (12:11):
Yeah, I think you're one hundred percent right there, because
I remember we went down on a trip down to
the White Akki. There was a White Aki in Topol,
there was the resort. Yeah, and we had we had
some wonderland heavy days on the on the lash, heavy days.
I mean I'm talking heavy, heavy, heavy, And and then

(12:32):
you got up in the morning with I'm saying an
hour's sleep, and then you said I got to do
this run. And we said, don't do the run. Don't
you don't need to do the run, you don't have
to do said no, I have to have to do it.
I said, I'm gonna do it.

Speaker 1 (12:44):
So I got to do it.

Speaker 2 (12:45):
It's like, and you ran and you came back and
I reckon you were seconds away from death. Seconds.

Speaker 1 (12:52):
Well, actually that day I did a next I did
twelve k that day, Oh my god. And because I
was getting psychopathic about it, But yeah I did. I
wasn't a zombie like state after that was far worse
for me than the two days of drinking was terrible.

Speaker 8 (13:04):
Yeah, that's the example, isn't it? Sometimes drinking it is
better than fitness.

Speaker 1 (13:08):
That might be the case that I talked to a
bunch of doctors about this and asked, if you're going
hard and on both fitness and on partying, are you
actually doing damage at both ends? And I couldn't get
a direct answer from a doctor about that, but my
mate Sean Gailan Ralph said, I think so. Looking at you,
I think whatever you're doing, I don't think it's good.

Speaker 9 (13:31):
This is the last ever Madden Jerry Show. Nice to
have you with us.

Speaker 6 (13:50):
That Jeremy Wells the Maiden.

Speaker 1 (13:53):
Cherry Show, It's sixty three Time for your radiohod I
can use headlines with Jeremy Wells.

Speaker 2 (14:01):
Around seventy people have taken evacuation advice in Dunedin and
headed to civil defense centers. The area is in a
state of emergency, with a red heavy rain warning in
place until nine tonight. Those who feel unsafe should go
to evacuation centers at forsythe Bar Stadium and Saint Clear
Golf Club.

Speaker 1 (14:18):
I've got a lot of family down there, but they
all sort of they're all raised up. They're up on
Hell's my fan very high. Some of them. I'm on
right up the top of Hells. So I'm pretty confident
my family's okay.

Speaker 2 (14:30):
A lot of Dunedin and I'm thinking that area around
Arrasbrook there south Dunedin.

Speaker 1 (14:35):
Oh my goodness, it's pretty.

Speaker 2 (14:36):
Low lying, isn't it.

Speaker 1 (14:37):
Well it's below the let's blow the ocean parts of it.
It's sunk in.

Speaker 2 (14:43):
What's callum proc are saying about the water table at
the moment on Newstalk's b in the mornings.

Speaker 1 (14:48):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (14:48):
You should know you work for Newstalk. You've got one
foot in each door. Now you've got one foot in
each camp.

Speaker 1 (14:52):
I'm listening to Radiohoache right now. What's callum proc is saying,
I'm looking for you.

Speaker 2 (14:56):
He's always got something to say about the Dunedin water
table every morning at five twenty.

Speaker 1 (15:00):
Well, the Dean water tables under pressure today, Jerry. But
I go to you for my news on radiohodecually, so
if you could please provide some details, I'd appreciate it.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
Okay, here we go. Hang in there. That's the message
being given to businesses Following another month of disappointment. Consumer
retail spending was down about three point five percent last
month compared to the same time last year.

Speaker 1 (15:18):
I bet they're loving that. Hanging there, hanging there.

Speaker 2 (15:20):
Hang on and hang in there. Everyone right in there.
Better times are a.

Speaker 1 (15:24):
Hit plan, isn't it. Yeah, hang in there, hang in
there on our current plan. What about that guy that
wasn't paying his rates. You know that he just got
done for not paying his rates. Hang in there, mate, Yeah, totally.

Speaker 2 (15:37):
And round A cherish for golf for Daniel Hillier at
the Iconics and Andrew's Old Course. Hilia was the day's
best performer, opening with nine under pass sixty three at
the Alfred Dunhill Links Championship. He's type a third at
the three course event, two strokes off the lead. Wicked.

Speaker 1 (15:53):
Yeah, thanks for that.

Speaker 2 (15:54):
Jerry Mike from The Big Show is in the studio
with us this morning. He's pumping tin. After the show,
they'll be pumping.

Speaker 1 (16:06):
Tin with you all eight or nine am.

Speaker 2 (16:09):
It's pumping Turn on the Mat and Jerry Show. Leave it.

Speaker 10 (16:12):
Then The Matt and Jerry Show Podcast the last ever
Matt and Jerry show.

Speaker 2 (16:17):
We're going to be here till nine, maybe eight fifty four,
who knows, probably knock it off a little bit early,
maybe even eight fifty two. Really, I mean, what's any
one going to say, what's pixy cam we're going to do.

Speaker 1 (16:29):
Whether it's talk that we might go till twelve or
something like Kyle and Jackie who do in Australia, they'll
just keep going. But then there was not talk.

Speaker 2 (16:38):
Why would we do that? Would we want to do that?
Mike Minogure is with us a mate and Mike Minogue
It's interesting how you came to be a part of
the Matt and Jewish, in fact, how you came to
become a part of the Radiohaddocke.

Speaker 1 (16:51):
Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 8 (16:52):
I think I mightst turned a loss into a win,
the opposite of the Matt Heath story.

Speaker 11 (16:58):
Very much so.

Speaker 1 (16:58):
But yeah, it was.

Speaker 8 (16:59):
It was prom ten or eleven years ago. You guys
had been on there and I don't think very long,
but it sort of coincided with me. I was cast.
I think I can.

Speaker 2 (17:11):
Say this now.

Speaker 8 (17:12):
We'll find out when the lawyers get in touch, but
I was cast as sir Edmund Hillary in a really
large production.

Speaker 1 (17:19):
I can see why daughter. My daughter looks at the
five dollar notes, she thinks it's me on there.

Speaker 8 (17:23):
And I don't change your mind about that.

Speaker 2 (17:28):
You don't.

Speaker 8 (17:28):
And anyway, about five days out from us, from the
very first day of shoot, they realized that I couldn't act.

Speaker 2 (17:35):
And they fired me.

Speaker 8 (17:37):
And so it was a real turning point in my
life because up until then I just sort of worked
really hard, but I'd just sort of gotten through and
opportunities would come your way without really having to put
any kind of work into it, just sort of got through.
So that was a turning point. I was like, I've
got to actually do some of the things I've been
talking about. I had an idea for a show called
The Watercolor and that was just I found watching TV

(17:57):
all of the stories or everything that I saw that
was New Zealand.

Speaker 11 (18:00):
Mate.

Speaker 8 (18:00):
At that time, I didn't think it was funny. I
was like, my mates are funny than this. The stories
we get out of the weekend are infinitely funnier than
the things I've seen on TV. So I thought, we'll
take those true stories and we'll turn them into like
five minute episodes, dramatic yeah, on a web series, which
was the thing back then. So I was applying for
money from New Zealand and here I want one hundred grand, big,
big cash. But you needed a platform. You needed to

(18:23):
have like a you know, a TV and Z or
a TV three or something like that. And I didn't
like my chances there, but I thought you guys were
really funny, so I thought I'd try and give you
guys a ring. And you had innovated radio. You know,
people that listen to areadio will know that you the
host will always talk over the intro music right up

(18:43):
until people start singing. But you guys would talk also
over the first verse, because as far as you were concerned,
your stories were more interest than the songs that were
being played. And I don't know how many, yeah, yeah,
I still back there, and I was a big fan
of that. So I asked a maid of mine if
he had either of your phone numbers, and jury he

(19:04):
had yours. And I gave you a ring, and I
told you what I was doing, and you said, well,
this is a crazy piece of timing because Matt and
I are setting up a comedy website at the moment
where we're going to be hosting exactly this sort of thing.
So you guys back there, this was about three days
I had to go to get in to get my
submission in and yet and got the one hundred grand.
We ended up making two series of that. From making

(19:25):
the water Cooler, ended up producing a film Coming Home
in the Dark, ended up producing TV you know, having
your radio show on that. It literally changed the course
of my life. And from there obviously into the ACC
and now doing Hodeki Drive Show and have been.

Speaker 1 (19:42):
A fan of the show all the way through.

Speaker 2 (19:43):
Obviously in of you guys.

Speaker 1 (19:44):
That's kinde of amazing. So you just reached out and
you got enveloped into the fold. You just got sucked right,
I got sucked in. So the point I got you
sucked in that you're in here in the station.

Speaker 8 (19:53):
The other thing that I did which really confirmed it
for me was I went to an Australia versus Black
Cat game that you guys were commentating all the a
SEC was down in Wellington there. I got welcomed into
a corporate box by a friend of mine. I got
absolutely maggeted. I got maggeted and I went going to
too much detail, but I was visiting. It was one

(20:15):
of those you know, when you visit it, you go
into the toilet too often and you're not sort of
aware of your own behavior, but you're going there a lot.

Speaker 11 (20:22):
And so.

Speaker 8 (20:25):
I leave and as I'm leaving with this maid of mine,
I run into Leeheart, Jason Hoyt, Mike Lane, Joe Jury,
none of whom I know or have ever met in
my life. And I just run in my yap and
they say, look, well, we're staying at We're staying at
the museum.

Speaker 1 (20:41):
I'm all right, we go back there.

Speaker 8 (20:43):
I'm giving the bartender shit. I'm trying to get take
these boys to the bathroom.

Speaker 11 (20:48):
I am My mate is embarrassed.

Speaker 12 (20:50):
He leaves.

Speaker 8 (20:52):
I wake up in the morning, and the shame that
I had was just it was off the Rectors style.
That day, I took a hundred days off drinking. I
didn't drink for one hundred days after that. Such was
my shame. I found out some years later that Mike
Lane and Joe Jury woke up the next day and went, man,
how good mon the best we got to get him

(21:13):
on the ac scene.

Speaker 2 (21:14):
For that group.

Speaker 1 (21:15):
That is the ultimate job for them. You didn't know
it at the time, but you would you would prepared
the first job interview, I couldn't have done it better
if I tried.

Speaker 8 (21:24):
There is not another job in the world that that
would have got me over the line.

Speaker 1 (21:27):
I didn't even know I was auditioning or in any kind.

Speaker 2 (21:30):
Of an interview.

Speaker 8 (21:30):
And then and ever since then, I've been really boring
and I haven't been on the Hemmel so today that
all changes.

Speaker 3 (21:36):
Yeah, yeah, you.

Speaker 1 (21:38):
Could have done a PowerPoint. You're going to have air
everything sorted. You have the best references. But just getting
steamed and acting like a complete penis got you in
the door.

Speaker 8 (21:46):
The problem with telling the story is every Partnisher out
there is going to think I'm going to go up.

Speaker 2 (21:50):
And talk.

Speaker 6 (22:00):
The Matt and Jerry Show podcast, The Mat and Jerry
Show Podcast.

Speaker 3 (22:10):
I've got a really big announcement.

Speaker 4 (22:11):
I guess you just have to rip the band aid off.

Speaker 2 (22:13):
Did you pay for this unregistered gift last night?

Speaker 1 (22:15):
Called it rather for the master of the minting. I
had better get home or a sup, he'll be cold.

Speaker 4 (22:20):
Yep, now we got it. I'm just junky. This is
an important one.

Speaker 1 (22:23):
Do you trim your downstairs, start discuss, tell you what
it's saying.

Speaker 4 (22:27):
It's quite spiritual at the moment, and here do you drink?

Speaker 2 (22:29):
What?

Speaker 3 (22:29):
I give you?

Speaker 4 (22:30):
A boy? What's wrong with you? What I start tonight?
After ten years on the mat.

Speaker 1 (22:34):
Jerry brief the show, I'm leaving the show.

Speaker 2 (22:45):
Good morning, Welcome along to the last ever Met and
Jerry show. It's Friday, the fourth of October twenty twenty four.

Speaker 1 (22:52):
That first day, I went way too fast. The whole
thing's going way too fast. I've been trying to enjoy
the moments, but I keep failing to you know what
I mean. Oh, I don't think you're failing to well,
you know what I mean, Like You're like, I want
to enjoy the moments, and then then an hour goes
like that, yeah, two weeks ago like that?

Speaker 2 (23:09):
Only a good sign.

Speaker 1 (23:09):
I've always thought, oh yeah, I mean, these shows have
always gone so fast because I've always said, such a
good time. I mean, how often do we say, oh
my god, it's eight thirty.

Speaker 5 (23:17):
Yeah, pretty much every day. We're very fortunate, aren't we.

Speaker 1 (23:20):
We can do that every single day. There's definitely no
clock watching on the shape.

Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yeah, it's it might take forever to listen to, but
I'll tell you what.

Speaker 1 (23:27):
It's the fastest three hours that you'll ever do a
brieckfast radio show. It's like someone that goes into space.
Time moves differently for different people. We're traveling the speed
of light, come back and everyone's old. Oh dead, Oh,
We're going to have a good time this morning. We're
going to have a good time this morning.

Speaker 2 (23:48):
There's going to be no tears, No tears anyone, No
no reflecting.

Speaker 1 (23:54):
Just slide on my shades.

Speaker 2 (23:55):
Yeah, just great shows, your favorite.

Speaker 13 (24:00):
Every single one. A moistener this morning, this so moist
juicing you up for another ten years, and beautiful altar
at all.

Speaker 6 (24:13):
Then Mat and Jerry Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (24:15):
So today we're celebrating Matt's fourteen years at radio, haddicky
eleven years on the Mat and Jerry Show. And we'll
look at some of the big moments, Matt, that you've
been involved in, and we'll break over the colds of
some incidence.

Speaker 1 (24:29):
Can we?

Speaker 2 (24:30):
I reckon?

Speaker 1 (24:31):
We could probably leave some of them on the on
the cutting room floor, couldn't we.

Speaker 2 (24:35):
Well, let me tell you that there is going to
be closure on the Shocker and Rewalker. There will be
closure before nine o'clock.

Speaker 1 (24:42):
No, there won't.

Speaker 2 (24:42):
There will be closure. No, there won't You owe it
to the You owe it to the listeners, You owe
it to everybody who's listened to the mat last eleven years.

Speaker 1 (24:52):
I don't think anyone really wants to hear the details
of the Shocker and Rewalk.

Speaker 2 (24:56):
Now here's the Texas is come in? Can't wait to
hear the details of the Shocker and Rewalker? Tell us?
Now tell us the details the details to another person.
Let us know.

Speaker 1 (25:05):
No one even remembers the Shocker and Newalker, least of
all me.

Speaker 2 (25:09):
Well, let's park the Shocker and Rewalker, and let's bring
up another incident which people have been asking to be addressed.
So back in two thousand and five, whenever we interviewed
a guest, we had a segment called thank you for
your honesty, and they were ten years or no answer
questions you had to answer y to No, you couldn't pass.

(25:31):
It caused a lot of problem for us. In fact,
it meant that a lot of people refused to come
on the show. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (25:37):
I mean we've asked a lot of New Zealand's politicians
and I think they've worked against us ever since. It
actually derailed our show doing this, didn't it.

Speaker 2 (25:46):
It did? It's interesting it sort of gave in one
way and then it took away on the other.

Speaker 5 (25:50):
It's classic.

Speaker 1 (25:52):
We gained a lot of listeners and a lot of enemies.

Speaker 2 (25:55):
Yeah. So we obviously we've addressed the John Key Sager
earlier on in the week where we asked the Prime
Minister of New Zealand, the sitting Prime minister at the time,
whether or not he had fed the chickens in the
last month, which ended up causing a incident in Parliament.
A lot of questions, questions were asked in the house.

Speaker 1 (26:14):
Yeah, it made international news. It caused him a lot
of embarrassment.

Speaker 2 (26:20):
And we asked him as well whether or not he
trims his downstairs. The answer is no, he doesn't.

Speaker 1 (26:24):
A lot of the politicians we asked where he does. Now,
we asked Grant Robinson, he said no.

Speaker 2 (26:28):
Yeah. Well this is the interesting part. So at the
time twenty fifteen, there was a labor leadership thing going
on and a whole lot of we interviewed every single
one of the labor leaders, Grant Robertson.

Speaker 1 (26:42):
And the ones that were going, the ones that were
trying to be the leader. I know where this is going,
and I'm going to give you an opportunity. Now, Jeremy,
I'm going to give you an opportunity to show mercy
and compassion for a close friend. I'm going to get
give you an opportunity to be the better man.

Speaker 2 (27:03):
A lot of people may want to hear you explain
yourself over the interview that we conducted with nanaiam A Herder,
a woman of great Maner, who was applying for the
labor leadership role. And I remember actually what happened preceding
this interview, because we had asked these questions of Grant Robertson,

(27:23):
we had asked these questions of Chris Hopkins. Was he
going Chris Hopkins who later became the leader? And so
the next person who we were interviewing that day was
Naniam A Herder, a woman of great Maner. And I
remember the conversations that occurred before that, and we said, well,
do we ask the same questions we've asked them of
everyone else? Do we need to continue on with these questions?

Speaker 1 (27:44):
And I said, you can't ask these questions of a woman,
And you said it would be sexist if you didn't
do the same to everyone. So you said, but then
there was a problem with these something for honesty questions
is that you're a lot smarter than me, and you
worked out that the order of them, every second one
is bad. And every time we'd get into the thank

(28:06):
you for your honesty questions, I realize he's done it again.
I'm in the bad order. I'm going to have to
ask all the terrible ones.

Speaker 2 (28:15):
The greatest thing about this is you are one hundred
percent right. I totally worked it out. I didn't when
we wrote them. I remember writing a few of them.
I didn't put them in an order in particular that
they were meant to be like this, But they just
ended up being that the worst ones were the odd questions,
and that even numbers were not as bad. But I

(28:35):
worked it out kind of early on that you'd get
on a run of asking the bad and with the
John Key ones, I felt like I got the bad ones.

Speaker 1 (28:42):
Yeah, that might be when you worked it out. Yeah,
And then.

Speaker 2 (28:45):
For other ones, I went, oh, no, if you actually
do ask the first question, then you don't. That's not
so bad anyway. With Nanaimahuda, you seem to have all
of the bad ones.

Speaker 1 (28:55):
Have listened to this, Have you been drunk, tipsy or
twanged in the last month? Tipsy.

Speaker 2 (29:02):
Have you ever killed an animal bigger than an insect?

Speaker 1 (29:05):
Oh?

Speaker 14 (29:06):
No?

Speaker 1 (29:07):
Have you ever passed a woman?

Speaker 15 (29:09):
Oh?

Speaker 9 (29:10):
No?

Speaker 2 (29:11):
This is god real. At this point, she's yes, she's
going along.

Speaker 1 (29:16):
Do you trim your downstairs?

Speaker 16 (29:19):
Sorry?

Speaker 1 (29:20):
Do you trim your downstairs?

Speaker 2 (29:23):
No? Have you ever done ws in the shower? What
have you ever done? We's in the shower?

Speaker 1 (29:30):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (29:30):
Come on?

Speaker 1 (29:33):
Do you talk on a cell phone while driving? No,
I've got to hear a phonecasting.

Speaker 2 (29:39):
Have you ever switched on private browsing mode on your computer?

Speaker 3 (29:42):
No?

Speaker 8 (29:43):
What's private breath?

Speaker 11 (29:44):
I don't even know what that is?

Speaker 1 (29:46):
Is Simon Dello sexy?

Speaker 2 (29:49):
Yeah? Have you ever stolen anything? No? And I'm a herder.
Thank you for your honesty. Humor though, thank you for
your honesty.

Speaker 1 (30:03):
That's on you, Jerry.

Speaker 2 (30:04):
I've never heard the full the full sweet.

Speaker 1 (30:07):
That's because you just punished me with the You blurted
it out because my horrible question was it was like
running one hundred meter race and noticing that there's a
hurdle at about eighty meters, and you see it at
the start of the race. I saw that do you
trim your downstairs? Question? Down the page that I was
reading them off and went, oh doing quick math? Do

(30:30):
you trim your downstairs?

Speaker 2 (30:36):
If you can see? Every time we play that audio,
I met rip phones off. Oh that's so many.

Speaker 1 (30:41):
It's done.

Speaker 4 (30:41):
It's over.

Speaker 1 (30:43):
Delete it from the system.

Speaker 2 (30:45):
Luckily that will never follow you to newstalks'd be ever?
Or will it?

Speaker 6 (30:50):
The Mat and Jerry Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (30:56):
On the Mountain Jerry Show, the last ever Mat and Jerry's.

Speaker 1 (30:59):
Show and people finding out what terrible music taste I
have as we play my favorite songs of all time.
That's a tune. I don't care what anyone says.

Speaker 5 (31:08):
Like, IM back you on Matte Jerry? How do you
feel about Whirst teenage dout Bag?

Speaker 2 (31:11):
I like Wheater's teenage dirutbaget on you? I like it?

Speaker 5 (31:14):
Oh yeah, dirt bag even like the bridge met it
when he starts to sound like a little bit like
a woman.

Speaker 2 (31:20):
Yeah I do.

Speaker 1 (31:21):
I find that bit quite hot.

Speaker 2 (31:23):
I feel like I've never heard that, but haven't you No,
we must have been talking whenever that song, whenever that
middle part of the song comes out.

Speaker 1 (31:30):
We haven't listened to a lot of the songs. Something
is because, as we keep saying, we gas gas bag
the worst crap ever, and as a result, when we
go on air again, I'm normally discombobulated about something shocking
that Jerry said three seconds before the lights come on.

Speaker 2 (31:43):
But that's a big part of it, and that's a
big part of the Matt and Jerry Show. And I
guess as a listener you don't necessarily know that. But
when the songs do play, you chat about all sorts
of weird stuff, and it's kind of like you come
in in the morning and then by the end of
the show you have covered a huge amount. You might
be talking about things that are deeply personal, might be

(32:04):
family related, stuff that you probably don't always want to
share with hundreds of thousands of people. But that's been
a lovely thing about being on the show. Matter is
that I come in, I might have something and something
might be bugging me. I'll talk to you through it.
You've always got great ideas, You've always got great opinions
on stuff. There's a big there's a it's kind of

(32:26):
like a Freudian psychology session in a funny sort of
a way. It's part therapy, it's part personal therapy session,
part broadcasting to hundreds of thousands of people.

Speaker 1 (32:36):
We're a family, and what's yeah, It is interesting like that,
doesn't it. And then you go home and then and
people say, why don't you talk very much? And you're like, well,
I've just talked solidly on air and off here for
four hours with people I don't actually have many words,
and you walk around for the rest of day listening
to people.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
You do give a lot in this job. That's the thing.
And I think I think listeners understand that. I think
that's why there's been so many wonderful messages, beautiful messages
this morning from people who have said, you know, you've
come into my life at a particular time when maybe
things were tough for me, and you've entertained more. You've
brought a smile to my face at certain times. But

(33:16):
it's the other part of that is that you do
give a lot. You know it does it takes a
bit out of you. Yeah, To be.

Speaker 1 (33:21):
Honest, I've been getting over the last couple of weeks
just just so many Instagram messages, like really long ones,
and a lot of them say that you know, you've
been a voice in my ear, you guys through through
through tough times because we're there every day and doesn't
mean we're great, but we're just a voice that they
get to know and and it's quite a personal thing

(33:42):
talking straight into people's ears. So just the sheer magnitude
magnitude of time I've been doing it means that I've
had a slight effect on some people here and there.
And those are the messages I'm beginning on my dam
slid into my dms on Instagram, stuff that they get
me every time, because you don't experience that when you're

(34:02):
doing the show, because you're just talking. You don't experience
what the listeners are experiencing. You don't know that you're
important to them. Yeah, and it's so humbling when you
find out that you've actually affected people's lives. Some people
have been listening since they were teenagers and gone through
tough times and now they've got kids and have found
us talking about our kids really really helpful for them

(34:23):
and that stuff. It makes you feel really privileged. Yeah,
really lucky a big part of it.

Speaker 2 (34:29):
And I remember talking to a great New Zealand broadcast
to Paul Holmes years and years and years ago, and
he was talking about doing his show and he said,
one of the biggest things that you can ever do
on a radio shows, turn up is that you turn up.
And if you turn up every day. Yeah, and you
turn up every day for years and years and years,
and you give yourself every day, then people will go

(34:54):
along with you. Yeah, and people will appreciate that over time.
People really appreciate the fact that you turn up. Yeah,
because by turning up here, you're not turning up somewhere else. Yeah,
if you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (35:05):
Yeah, And it's a constant. It's a constant because we're
always here.

Speaker 2 (35:10):
Yeah, we have to be.

Speaker 1 (35:12):
Sometimes they've asked me not to be here.

Speaker 2 (35:13):
No, You've always turned up.

Speaker 1 (35:15):
I've always turned up.

Speaker 2 (35:16):
I've always turned up.

Speaker 1 (35:17):
Sometimes they've said, we wish you wouldn't turn up on
that state, Matt, especially in the early years when I
was quite a fan of the getting boozed.

Speaker 2 (35:26):
Well, I know you've always said, you know, you've got
even though I am massively intoxicated, I've got to be
there for the listeners.

Speaker 1 (35:35):
Yeah. I've also said, if you go out with the boys,
you've got to get up with the men. Yeah. Yeah,
even if they don't want you there, even if you
good point getting up with the men is Jerry kicking
you because you've been sleeping under the under the desk.

Speaker 2 (35:50):
This is a nice text, morning Faro. I was born
in the same year as Jerry, and it's always brought
me some strength and hope. Listening to you old boys
sounding as youthful as I feel. Now. I Matt off
to middle aged radio, and I imagine how he will
be getting some young backhand. Is it time for me
to change the talk back? Possibly? Love you, Maddie, love
all of you. And this this is interesting here. It'll

(36:13):
be fitting at some stage to play some of the
greatest hits of yesteryears, such as Simon Bridge is saying
he hates just in his unborn baby, Emperor Wu and
his goats. On the Wonderful World.

Speaker 1 (36:24):
We talked so much about Emperor Wu with the goats,
and he'd ride around in a car to where off
the goats stop. He'd make love so.

Speaker 2 (36:31):
Much so that we turned the Wonderful World segment into
the Wonderful World of Chaina for a while, do you remember, Yeah,
And then, of course the time that Matt got served
a tux dog biscuit for lunch from his host Billet
who didn't have kids.

Speaker 1 (36:44):
And let's not redilegate. Dr McLain and his visit to
me No.

Speaker 5 (36:50):
I wasn't going to read that, but.

Speaker 1 (36:53):
That's not a happy memory.

Speaker 2 (36:55):
Lot's coming up on the Mat and Jerry Show, the
final ever Matt and Jerry Show radio heading.

Speaker 1 (37:00):
It's Jerry and Master.

Speaker 17 (37:02):
Talking on it for Sweedio hold Ocky.

Speaker 4 (37:08):
Six until nine.

Speaker 18 (37:10):
Yes they will.

Speaker 2 (37:11):
Be there, was Rude and mass she.

Speaker 18 (37:16):
It's Matthew Heath and Jeremy.

Speaker 6 (37:24):
Matt Heath Jeremy Wells, The Maiden Cherry Show.

Speaker 2 (37:29):
Seven thirty one.

Speaker 1 (37:30):
So hey, I'm still I'm still here mate, one of
my one of my jobs. I'm most proud of us.
Here we go. Well, let me play it again, hold up,
let me my second, last time minute we get to
do this.

Speaker 6 (37:43):
Matt Heath, Jeremy Wells, The Maiden Cherry Show.

Speaker 1 (37:50):
It's seven thirty two. Time for your radio Hedache news
headlines with Jeremy's.

Speaker 2 (37:56):
Amazing that we managed to have an old man's nippy
every single time in there. A state of emergency is
in place with red alerts for Dunedin, North Otaga and
Coastal Kluther. As more rainfalls. Those in South don Edin
are being encouraged to self evacuate to higher ground of
waters rise. One person Graham, no second name. Scissor's house
on Bayview Road in South Deneen is surrounded by almost

(38:19):
half a meter of water. Meanwhile, the Needing correspondent, Callum
Proctor says a number of highways and local roads are
closed across the South, including sections of state Highways eighty seven,
eighty eight and ninety.

Speaker 1 (38:30):
I watched the one News last night and the weather
gul he was so excited about that weather, wasn't he.

Speaker 2 (38:38):
We loves a bit of weather about it. And there's
a bit of with it.

Speaker 1 (38:40):
Nothing that the Dan Corps going is.

Speaker 2 (38:42):
Coming around here and sound and.

Speaker 1 (38:46):
Then it goes right through right through the lower South Island.
Where's the west coast when you need? I thought that
the southern outs would block a bit of it, but
it's sort of come round below. It has gone around
the going around the backs end of that.

Speaker 2 (38:59):
And that's the thing thing. It never comes in very
really from the east like this and dned and so
it's just coming in and then getting stuck.

Speaker 1 (39:05):
Well, I hope everyone's all right down there, especially my dad.
The one positive, the one of my nieces and nephews.

Speaker 2 (39:13):
Yes, the one positive thing about all of this is
that the knits that you bought to Sterling have finally
been flooded out and drowned.

Speaker 1 (39:22):
I've got to read once I bought. My sister sent
me this yesterday. I thought, I thought of you. I mean,
this is in the middle of the news headlines. But
she said, I remember those knits. She goes, Oh, she goes.
It's been so great to hear you each day. But
I love you, Catherine. I was laughing about the knits

(39:43):
and Sterling because I remember we all had them. Poor Auntie,
Heather combing, you're long here.

Speaker 13 (39:50):
I remember flicking the knits into the fire as well.

Speaker 2 (39:57):
Yeah, I mean your of us were you're poor under
here they having to look after four extra kids.

Speaker 1 (40:02):
Yeah, she had three of her own.

Speaker 2 (40:04):
Oh my god.

Speaker 1 (40:05):
And I'm bringing that's down from from from Duned and
living and Sterling.

Speaker 4 (40:09):
To hear that.

Speaker 2 (40:10):
Is that your mum's twin sister. Yeah ah yeah, right man.

Speaker 1 (40:14):
Anyway, love you, Catherine if you're listening.

Speaker 2 (40:16):
Big Sis and Auckland women's been blocked from selling tasers
and pepper spray on Facebook. Seems like smart police have
shut down an online restricted weapons operation after searching your
property in Blockhouse Bay. Always in Blockhouse Bay, they found
dozens of pepper spray, stun guns, knives and more than
one point six kilograms of marijuana or was that being used?

(40:39):
As well as a deterrent? Here? You have a joint? Okay, sweet?

Speaker 1 (40:44):
Actually that would work. It's hard in real time to
get someone to spark up a joint just before they
assault you.

Speaker 2 (40:49):
Yeah. And New Zealand Rugby has asked World Rugby to
clarify France's plans not to select some of their top
stars for next year's three Tests two here. World Rugby
rules specified players must be made available for selection during
designated international windows, but the French union says they won't
select players to tour New Zealand next June who feature
in the domestic top fourteen final. Ah. Right, They are

(41:10):
allowed to do whatever they want, aren't they. Yeah?

Speaker 1 (41:12):
I guess I guess they are.

Speaker 2 (41:15):
We've been resting players for years in certain games.

Speaker 1 (41:17):
That's true, we do, don't we. I mean, I mean,
does Japan ever put up their hand and say, hey,
you're sending a B team over here?

Speaker 16 (41:24):
No?

Speaker 1 (41:25):
No, they're allowed to do what they want.

Speaker 2 (41:26):
Exactly.

Speaker 1 (41:27):
Disappointing though, because you, I mean, a three test series,
how freaking good? But yeah, I guess that's their prerogative.

Speaker 2 (41:34):
Good Morning, says this text ahead. Good morning, Jis and Liz.
Any chance of getting your reprisal of Gepsy in The
Wounded for one break on the show This Morning.

Speaker 1 (41:44):
We've told the story a lot, but we did one
show as Jepsy and the Woundered. Because we were quite
hungover what town did we do that from, we decided
to change the name to Jepsy and the Wounder Napier Napier.
We did one show and then we were in Las Vegas,
you and me, and we were walking into the Tropicana,
I believe it was, and someone came out of the
lift and just said morning Jepsy, Morning Wounded. And this
was like about six months later, just walked past, and

(42:05):
I thought that was a great piece of interaction because
they they didn't deli on it, because normally you see
some New Zealanders overseas and you'd hang around and chat
and go, Shaul, we get a drink. But this guy
just delivered it so perfectly and walked off and we
never saw him again.

Speaker 5 (42:17):
I've just been looking through the archives as you've been
discussing this, and I found the intro to that show
that you goes use. We just have a quick listen
to that and see if you can remember this.

Speaker 19 (42:29):
That's Righties and gentleman, He's welcome, Gypsy and the Wounder.

Speaker 11 (42:36):
Hey, hey, hey mate, and.

Speaker 1 (42:39):
Shadow mere well, powerful start to a show.

Speaker 2 (42:43):
That that's right. That was the beginning of a show, wasn't.

Speaker 1 (42:45):
It, Jepsy and the Wounder? What was like the Wounded?

Speaker 2 (42:49):
It turns out that you shouldn't change the names of
the people on your show halfway through.

Speaker 1 (42:53):
It's confusing. Yeah, it's running away from your audience.

Speaker 2 (42:57):
We're playing songs that Matt loves or morning this Morning,
and here we go. This is an absolute rapper. Joan
from nineteen eighty.

Speaker 6 (43:04):
Four The Matt and Jerry Show Podcast seven forty.

Speaker 2 (43:10):
On The Mat and Jerry Show. The last year I
a Matt and Jerry show. That's twisted, sister.

Speaker 1 (43:13):
There's been a couple of foul portents. Is the word
portinse foul portense four palt four foul portents. Well, just
interesting things that have happened in the universe since I've
been leaving the show, Like my goldies, my beloved headphones
that have worn the entire time in the show. They
broke down, they die, never to go again yesterday, I believe,
or someday. And also my I found out today that

(43:37):
my washing machine you have to change the filter after
eleven years or it fills up with gunge. In the morning,
it suddenly spews sewage everywhere and stinks up the whole place,
which I think is a metaphor that Radiohodech anyway is
changing the filter of the Matt and Jerry Show and
unleashing the gunge and removing the stink.

Speaker 5 (44:00):
So who's the I mean, what's the gun just.

Speaker 2 (44:03):
Is this shit that's been coming out his mouth eleven
years and into people's ears. I guess the washing machine
is a metaphor. Really, the washing machine is that as
people walking around, the gunge is the crap that's been
going out of your mouth and into people's ears, that's
now existing inside of people's brains because people are walking

(44:24):
around right now, not running to get too weird on it,
but people are walking around at any given time have
listened to the show, and the fact that you've had
on them is that they're walking around with stuff that
you've said and it's been implanted somehow into their brain
and you know, created memories, created ideas, created images, whatever
that is, and they're now walking around with it.

Speaker 1 (44:42):
Well, we've got this text here from a text to
thank you so much for your nice messages coming through
and three for it through. It's very humbling and beautiful messages.
And said, my three year old son learned the word
pest from you guys calling everyone a pest. So isn't
it nice someone's three year old son. It's been walking
around calling everyone a pest. It's an important word to note.

Speaker 2 (45:01):
Yeah, Well, the good thing is this morning as well.
You're talking about that metaphor with your washing machine and
you cleaned you cleaned the filter out. Yeah, I cleaned
the filter out this morning.

Speaker 1 (45:10):
And that's why it's almost late for work for the
first time this morning, because because I thought there'd been
a sewage leak in the laundry.

Speaker 2 (45:16):
And in a way, I guess this morning show is
exactly the same thing. It's a cleaning of the filters
of the crap that's been shared over the years.

Speaker 1 (45:26):
Well, I've often been accused of not having a filter,
and yet I did have a filter that was just
full of grime. Does that work as a metaphorse?

Speaker 2 (45:35):
I know it does. It totally does. It totally does.
So this is the last ever madd and Jerry Show.
And here's a song that means a lot to us
on the Mat and Jerry Show because the lyrics, particularly
to the chorus wet my penis walking down the street.

(46:00):
This means a lot to me with my peanuts walking
down the street. It's given us a lot of joy
over the years.

Speaker 6 (46:10):
Then Matt and Jerry Show Podcast, the last.

Speaker 2 (46:13):
Ever Matt and Jerry Show eleven years. Jeez, could it
slow down a bit? We could be part of the
brakes a bit. It's already seven forty six of my
last show.

Speaker 1 (46:22):
I thought we were going to sort of I'm going
to drag out every last second of it, but it's
flying by. I guess that's another metaphor for life. Isn't
it messy?

Speaker 5 (46:29):
Is get it printed on the T shirt?

Speaker 2 (46:31):
Did you.

Speaker 1 (46:34):
Wor time flies? Doesn't it does?

Speaker 5 (46:37):
I mean, how are you feeling anyway, mate? Because I
suppose you've had a lot of messages and stuff like
that over the past few while. Oh my goodness, someone
has just walked into the d studio. We're going to
talk about who that is, or we're just going to
ignore that from.

Speaker 1 (46:47):
Now really hard, isn't it?

Speaker 5 (46:51):
Are we going to talk about who that is out there?

Speaker 11 (46:53):
Well?

Speaker 2 (46:53):
I think I think the Prime Minister's coming in, Yeah,
the prime minister. The Prime Minister's coming in. And actually
we've got an idea. There's a ribbon because of course
normally what happens as prime minister's come in and cut
ribbons to start things. And I believe the New Zealand
Prime Minister Chris Luckson is coming into the Matt and
Jerry Show to sellotape a ribbon back up against So
we've got a ribbon that's sitting with a monitor of

(47:17):
you and my face there, Matt, and I believe that
the promise is going to be seltating that.

Speaker 1 (47:25):
Because he's a John Key plark on this building we're in,
isn't it. That's where we opened this building?

Speaker 2 (47:29):
Yeah, well he did open this building, and I remember
when he opened the building, there was a little bit
of chat because of course, the last time we'd run
into the Prime minister formed Prime Minister John Keyser John Key,
we had asked him a series of questions which had
landed us in a little bit of trouble and landed
him in a little bit of trouble.

Speaker 1 (47:45):
Which was unfair because he came at it with good faith.

Speaker 2 (47:48):
He did, Yeah, he did.

Speaker 1 (47:49):
Yeah, I felt bad about that.

Speaker 14 (47:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (47:51):
Look, I felt a little bit bad about that as well.
But that's the way that things go.

Speaker 1 (47:56):
Desperate to just come up with some content on your radio.

Speaker 2 (48:00):
And there's a lot of people who are text again
saying that we shall be asking Prime Mister Chris Luckson
exactly the same questions that we ask. Promise we don't growing.

Speaker 1 (48:06):
We've grown. We're growing people fifteen we've grown as people.

Speaker 2 (48:11):
Yeah, so so up next, Prime Minister Chris Lukson joins
us on the show to cello tape up the ribbon
on the last ever Madden Jerry Show.

Speaker 1 (48:21):
Oh boy, starting to it emotional now tune Here we
go boys.

Speaker 10 (48:29):
The Matt and Jerry Show podcast, the last ever Met
and Jerry Show and were joined this morning by New
Zealand Prime Minister Christopher lux And.

Speaker 2 (48:36):
Welcome to the show, Prime Minister we Wing.

Speaker 12 (48:38):
It's good to be with you. I'm honored to be
here on the last day.

Speaker 1 (48:40):
It is this one of the most important events in
your calendar.

Speaker 12 (48:44):
Well, I mean for the term the first ten months.

Speaker 2 (48:50):
Yeah, Well, normally what happens, Prime Minister is I'm sure
around the place you're asked to cut ribbons to open
buildings and things like us. I mean, this very building
here open Former Prime Minister, Sir John Key.

Speaker 12 (49:02):
He has an illustrious history with the show, doesn't he,
he Sicky does.

Speaker 2 (49:06):
Yeah, yeah, so.

Speaker 1 (49:06):
We we we we asked him some some challenging questions
that sort of made international news. Did he ever did
he raise that issue with you when you when you
started visiting us on the show constantly?

Speaker 12 (49:18):
Actually, I think it's I think it's his only political
failure or regret that he ever has, you know. And
it's funny. I called him, I said, this morning, I
was coming into your show and I thought, oh, this
line of inquiry might come up again. And I said, mate,
I'll call you again if it comes up, and they
can apologize to you. If they were, you know, just
with reflection, they might have thought that maybe it's a
bit sort of they matured more, maybe.

Speaker 1 (49:39):
Massively.

Speaker 12 (49:40):
He's trying to now and he's missing and actually he's
not taking my call, but he's actually sort of traveling
probably out to his helicopter little Gumby as he calls it.
And has Bentley Aquamarine Green flying around somewhere in the.

Speaker 2 (49:54):
North Shore and I spect, so, yeah, he's living his
best life with set up a ribbon here. This is
a first. Actually yeah, I'm hoping it is a first.
So there's a ribbon over there, and it's over a
monitor that says Matt Heath and Jeremy Wells six to
nine weekdays. And you've, as I said, been asked to
cut a lot of ribbons from a lot of things

(50:15):
over these buildings, et cetera, and probably open a lot
of events.

Speaker 12 (50:20):
This here, I hope is a first, and would like
you to representing well.

Speaker 2 (50:25):
It's representing the.

Speaker 12 (50:27):
Man's in humanity to man or sort of something more profound.

Speaker 1 (50:31):
Well, it's a circle of life.

Speaker 12 (50:33):
Circle of life.

Speaker 1 (50:34):
Yeah, I like that.

Speaker 12 (50:35):
That's good.

Speaker 1 (50:35):
That that works.

Speaker 12 (50:36):
It works.

Speaker 1 (50:36):
It's been open, now it gets closed, that's right.

Speaker 2 (50:38):
So it's about to be it's about to be closed
back up again. So if you'd like to go over
to the ribbon, there's some sellotape that's sitting on a
dB crate and if you'd like to take that sellotape,
thank you very much. Promise now is taking the salotape,
and then he is putting the yellow ribbon back together
and then sellotaping it back together. This is and this

(51:01):
represents the closing of the loop of the Mat and
Jerry show after eleven years. This is this is deep.

Speaker 1 (51:07):
This is like commentary from the opening of the Olympics
that you've been here and to represent the.

Speaker 2 (51:14):
Boss saying that's something I like the way you banged
back from it to give up respect.

Speaker 12 (51:19):
Being at the cenotaph, sort of going backwards with the.

Speaker 1 (51:22):
Wreath and hell, there'll be a plaque beside that, and
that will sit there for how long.

Speaker 12 (51:26):
About three months?

Speaker 1 (51:30):
The qualities the sellotap's actually going already, it won't be
saying anything that long.

Speaker 2 (51:34):
We've had a number of texts asking us to ask
you the same questions that we asked John Key back
in two thousand.

Speaker 12 (51:40):
Yeah, we ain't going there, and we are not going there.

Speaker 1 (51:43):
If you we're not going to ask them to you.
But if you wanted to ask answer them of your
own volition, no, I don't know that was mister gullible.
If you wanted a volunteer information, no, I'm new to politics,
but I observe that one from outside.

Speaker 12 (51:58):
I thought that was not one. I would have touched.

Speaker 1 (52:01):
Most of the first time you came on our show,
you must have gone, what am I doing?

Speaker 12 (52:05):
No, No, I actually I've listened to you guys for
forks actually and so so it was actually really great
to come on your show and actually meet you in person.
I met Jeremy a little bit of my former life,
because you know how he's sort of like mister Media.
He's got, you know, so many different gigs and a
personalities and egos and stuff like that. So I meet
him in a more serious note.

Speaker 1 (52:22):
I think, hang on a minute, there's there's a conspiracy
theory about to people. Look at that in the same
room at the same time.

Speaker 12 (52:32):
You know this is this is actually more important than
than his last day, because we are busting a conspiracy
theory that has existed in New Zealand.

Speaker 11 (52:39):
You would not believe how many women I've scored.

Speaker 12 (52:44):
Can I just say you are one? You are a
good looking man.

Speaker 1 (52:49):
Look at you?

Speaker 12 (52:50):
Look at that and how do you do the here?

Speaker 1 (52:52):
Is it sort of like all the lack of here?

Speaker 12 (52:54):
I guess it's just mac Fife. Yes, yeah, yeah, it's
just one. That's beautiful. Look, he's a beautiful man, isn't
he Yeah, he's a good looking dude.

Speaker 2 (53:04):
What's interesting is that he's brought a plumbing closure.

Speaker 12 (53:10):
He's been draining the swamp.

Speaker 2 (53:12):
Crime.

Speaker 12 (53:15):
Now, this is amazing because the conspiracy theory is that
we are one and the same person.

Speaker 16 (53:19):
Well, honestly, the amount advance I've got into seas they
may have traded enterprise brought to this country.

Speaker 1 (53:32):
He's got himself a prime minsterel limousine and he's he's
been driven.

Speaker 12 (53:38):
I've been running around in Premier House too. I haven't
seen him there yet.

Speaker 1 (53:42):
Stay out there. It's not earthquake, So yeah, at a
premier house.

Speaker 11 (53:45):
Yeah, very good. It's very good. But is this literally
the last show?

Speaker 2 (53:48):
Yeah? Literally literally lasted on it.

Speaker 12 (53:54):
I just can't. I mean, I can't take my eyes
off me and he's he's so good looking, isn't he.
It's like Jason Staith and my self and him. It's
sort of like we're a Milan.

Speaker 1 (54:03):
Ali meets Me's and a pilot and more ways than one.

Speaker 2 (54:06):
Yeah, thanks for coming in with you, ladies, and thanks
for putting the ribbing back together.

Speaker 12 (54:13):
Ye, and thanks for helping us bust the conspiracy theory
that sat out there from the time. But Matt. Can
I just say to you made all the very best
for the future. A and it's really exciting when you
step out your comfort zone will be a bit scary.
You're going to be awesome at it.

Speaker 1 (54:25):
So thank you so much.

Speaker 12 (54:27):
Yeah, and we wish you all the best. And I
look forward to coming on your show to you, so
it'd be great.

Speaker 1 (54:30):
It's good to coming in.

Speaker 2 (54:30):
He'll be lobbing up some softballs to you on newstalk.

Speaker 6 (54:40):
The Mast and Jerry Show Podcast, The Mass and Jerry
Show Podcast.

Speaker 3 (54:49):
We've got a really big announcement.

Speaker 4 (54:51):
I guess you just have to rip the band aid off?

Speaker 2 (54:53):
Did you pay for this unregistered guest last night called
the men?

Speaker 1 (54:56):
I had better get home or a sup he'll be cold? Yep,
now we got it from this junkie. This is an
important one.

Speaker 4 (55:02):
Do you trim your downsteads?

Speaker 1 (55:03):
Start discuss that it's quite spiritual at the moment, and
ye do you drink what I give you?

Speaker 4 (55:10):
Boy? What's wrong with you?

Speaker 1 (55:11):
Would I start to night?

Speaker 4 (55:12):
After ten years.

Speaker 1 (55:13):
On the Matt Jerry Brief the show, I'm leaving the show.

Speaker 2 (55:18):
Well, so the last y ever Matt and Jerry Show.
It's Friday, the fourth of October twenty twenty four, after
eleven years of the Matt and Jerry Show, fourteen years
on Radio HDARCHI this is the final, the final piece
of the final.

Speaker 1 (55:37):
App yep the mia Koppa, in the last hour of
apologies before I slip off into the night. Thank you
for all these lovely texts that are coming through in
three for three. Really appreciate that. It's very humbling stuff
coming through, so bless you all.

Speaker 2 (55:50):
There's a few things to go over before we get
to nine o'clock this morning. A few things to apologize
for and some closure on the shocker and Rewoker.

Speaker 1 (55:59):
I can't think we really need to close that one out.
I think I think people enjoyed the mystery around the
chakra and Rewalker.

Speaker 2 (56:05):
I can honestly say we will. We will get to
the bottom of exactly what happened in Rewalker there in
the late nineties, and the ditch, all the stuff around
the ditch will be answered. The leaving the scene of
the crime, the police investigation, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
Acc g Lane has seen in the studio Lee hearts
here as well.

Speaker 15 (56:23):
Yes, is there a statute of limitations around the statue
probably the statue. We probably actually would put a statue.

Speaker 1 (56:32):
There, the Statue of Limitations.

Speaker 15 (56:33):
With the Statue of Limitations.

Speaker 1 (56:36):
I wreck the statue, just remind people that it's past
the Statue of Limitations. Okay, you're the stature.

Speaker 15 (56:40):
Statue Stature of Limitations.

Speaker 11 (56:43):
There's a statue of Matt Heath, which is the Statue
of limitations.

Speaker 1 (56:47):
This is this whole show has kind of been away
a monument to limitations, hasn't it, even years of showing.

Speaker 16 (56:55):
I mean, look, there has been some good moments. Honestly,
I remember a couple of years back and I think
I was driving. Where was I I can't remember now
it doesn't matter, but the point.

Speaker 1 (57:04):
Was are you driving?

Speaker 11 (57:07):
I hope you weren't driving. I think I was going
to Echo Large or something.

Speaker 16 (57:10):
You guys had an amazing voice break.

Speaker 11 (57:14):
I can't remember when it was and a half.

Speaker 16 (57:16):
It's about three minutes, but it's about three minutes. And
then I think you went into a good song that
I liked. I can't even remember that song is. But
my point is, you know you've done some good ship,
you've done some average stuff.

Speaker 11 (57:28):
But if you average it out.

Speaker 1 (57:31):
Well, if you if you if you just run a
low level. Then, you know, if you're always doing good stuff,
it doesn't stuck up, you know. But if you have
a low bar every now and then the days you'll
pop up.

Speaker 16 (57:41):
It's like making love. You never never bring your best
stuff out on the first night until she's about to
leave you. Then you suddenly, my guy, he's awesome.

Speaker 1 (57:54):
But unfortunately we haven't brought every stuff out for the last.

Speaker 2 (57:56):
Joy, I would play big tunes, your favorite tunes, Matt
all the way to nine o'clock this.

Speaker 6 (58:02):
Morning, the Matt and Jerry Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (58:05):
That is White Snake on The Matten Jerry Show, the
last ever Mass and Jerry's show after eleven years.

Speaker 1 (58:10):
Doesn't seem real, does it? It does not seem real.

Speaker 16 (58:13):
It must been a long time since I've been already,
I can't even get my headphones, A long time.

Speaker 15 (58:19):
Since you've been to bid lee Heart, your hit is
such a unique shape that no headphones fit your sweet now.

Speaker 2 (58:25):
The other thing Lee Heart does is he only puts
his headphones on one ear, which I've always thought was really,
really weird.

Speaker 11 (58:30):
Jerry that I like to read the room, I like
to hear the room, and I like to hear the ship.

Speaker 16 (58:35):
That you're talking at the same time, and that's what
I'm doing at the moment.

Speaker 11 (58:39):
But God, my god, you guy's been here the whole time.

Speaker 1 (58:42):
We have been here the whole time.

Speaker 2 (58:44):
Hey, this is interesting because in the room, obviously we've
got Lee Heart, We've got ACC here, Glane, Matt's here,
I'm here, and a big thing that we've been doing
for the last eleven years because essentially the Matt Jerry
Show has been running for exactly the same time as
the ACC the Alternative Commentary Collective, and that's become a
big part of us and our relationship and interesting with

(59:07):
these guys as well traveling around the country.

Speaker 1 (59:09):
I think the first Matt and Jury show was the
first a c C day after after we did that
in the game, and then we went in and did
the first Met and Jury show, which was which was
kind of controversial because we said I was starting the show.
We're really excited we'll be doing it from a different town.

Speaker 11 (59:24):
God, you've got to give memory. The whole thing's a blur.

Speaker 1 (59:27):
Well, me and Gelane have just written the ACC Almanac,
did you, Matt Heath, Mike Claine and.

Speaker 11 (59:40):
I've just realized too, what you've been on eleven years.
I think I was here for six of it.

Speaker 15 (59:45):
I was your boss, Yes, I was your manager.

Speaker 11 (59:48):
How does that?

Speaker 2 (59:48):
How?

Speaker 11 (59:49):
How is that even possible?

Speaker 15 (59:50):
And hence that's why it was such a disgrace for
six years. Hence it was the worst period behaved.

Speaker 1 (59:56):
They were the best years. The worst behaved.

Speaker 11 (59:58):
As well, they're the best year.

Speaker 15 (01:00:00):
I mean, you know, only two marriages were lost.

Speaker 2 (01:00:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:00:03):
Well, what I would say is that both of my mind.
What I would say is that Hide has always been
a social club as much as it's been a radio station. Yeah,
sort of a gentleman's club with a woman involved as well.

Speaker 5 (01:00:19):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:00:19):
Well that was part of the reason that the a
SEC started was that we all used to watch cricket
together and this was a way of us getting to
go to the games for free and sit in a
special place that we could generally drink as well, away
from everyone else in a caravan. And it was like
it was like a trojan horse almost had been rolled
into a lot of those cricket venues.

Speaker 11 (01:00:41):
It wasn't almost, it was it was a trojan horse, Trojan.

Speaker 2 (01:00:45):
Of sorts.

Speaker 1 (01:00:46):
This was good text. I blame grim Laine and his
curse for causing the end of my favorite radio show
and podcast.

Speaker 11 (01:00:54):
That's rough, plenty of time.

Speaker 1 (01:00:59):
For this was a slow burning curs I. It was
the gay if.

Speaker 16 (01:01:03):
We bring back to the ACC though. I was thinking
about it as I drove in here today with.

Speaker 11 (01:01:07):
The nature drive the number.

Speaker 1 (01:01:08):
But thankfully you three or four of us here.

Speaker 2 (01:01:13):
I suppose.

Speaker 11 (01:01:15):
I had the most laughs with you guys.

Speaker 16 (01:01:17):
Every the most ridiculous scenarios tended to be with you guys.
Because I don't like laughing properly in public. I try
to not laugh. But there were so many moments where
we were literally having tears rolling down our eyes with
scenarios I couldnt you know.

Speaker 15 (01:01:38):
The plurality one probably got you the most plurisy.

Speaker 11 (01:01:42):
I will never forget that changed my life. And I'm
going this guy's a sim chap what.

Speaker 2 (01:01:52):
Yeah, No, absolutely, I mean, and let's not forget that
ACC here g Lane was it used to be ACC
and hochhad g Lane was your official title back in
those days. You had the two. You had the two titles,
which is not easy. No, it's not easy, the dual
titles looking after a lot of a lot of really
punishing people to look after. But Blitz Versus was a

(01:02:13):
hugely popular scene.

Speaker 16 (01:02:14):
And he had like you know, radio Hosts and sex Best.
That's that's two titles. It's very hard to maintain that.

Speaker 2 (01:02:21):
Yeah, but Acc Glane was constantly trying to shut down
Blitz versus Jizz steaming in and and then trying to
and I remember in the end we had a sting
made because people were calling up and you had G Lane.
You you tried to you tried to instigate your own
songs into it because you went happy with I think
I played the Justin Bieber song at one stage and

(01:02:43):
you weren't happy about that and so and in the
end we had stings made up for you. Actually that
were the g Laine stings of no confidence and digit
g Lane, and we ended up having this one here.

Speaker 1 (01:02:55):
That's for no confidence vote from Acc and reckon.

Speaker 2 (01:03:03):
That's what the people said in the steaming in. This
is the last ever Mat and Jerry show. We're going
to be here till nine o'clock. The Australian Content Director
Pixie Campbell has given us an open forum to be
here till twelve. We'll be leaving at eight fifty two.
Good Tune, Wild Cherry, you guys want sports.

Speaker 6 (01:03:26):
Sunday The Mat and Cherry Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (01:03:32):
A twenty two I'm the Mantain Jerry Show. That is
Wild Cherry playing songs Matt that you have personally chosen.
All Morning Viza all known either as Monday moisteners or
there used to be one called the Wednesday Wounder. Remember
the Wednesday Wounder.

Speaker 1 (01:03:45):
I remember having a meeting with our p D at
the time, dancing Dan Bradley Bradley, and he called an
emergency meeting around my Wednesday wounders. This is why I
think you shouldn't be playing the Wednesday wounded.

Speaker 11 (01:03:56):
You used to do that on purpose because he used
to do it to me as well.

Speaker 15 (01:03:58):
I think you had the eight o'clock thumper or something
if that was what you did.

Speaker 1 (01:04:03):
And you you like segments to play my own music.

Speaker 15 (01:04:05):
But you wanted a reaction as well. You crave the
text message saying you can't be playing cold Play at
eight o'cloin whatever cold Play clock song.

Speaker 1 (01:04:16):
Whatever the whatever the PD wanted. I wanted the opposite.

Speaker 2 (01:04:19):
Correct.

Speaker 15 (01:04:20):
When you crave, you crave the feedback we need. We
have a meeting over the road at nine o'clock. Talk
about the eight o'clock thumper.

Speaker 2 (01:04:26):
Yeah, I imagine that a number of pds over this,
because we've had a few. I've been one, two, three, four, five,
and the time that we've been doing the Mat and
Deary Show five was the longest six years.

Speaker 1 (01:04:36):
We've seen them all off we've seen.

Speaker 2 (01:04:40):
I love it, But I imagine that a lot of
those p d's have had questions from the people above
them because they have bosses, from their bosses bosses and
their boss's bosses around what the hell's going on? And
can I rain these two?

Speaker 15 (01:04:50):
And please jesus, hey, can I just say before before
I pop out this morning, it's my wife's birthday this morning,
my long suffering wife. I've just been on a ten
day bender in Europe with Jerry and everyone else, and
you keep it yourself, and you know it's her birthday
and she hadn't seen me for a while.

Speaker 11 (01:05:10):
I'm still hungover.

Speaker 15 (01:05:11):
I'm still I'm acting like I'm still not hungover, but
I am desperately struggling, and she's like, where are you going?
And it's like, I made a breakfast, I've got to
go and Matt and Jerry slash that's our show. She
looked at me like, I hate you. Oh, and I
say it's okay, it's okay. I know you're long suffering,
but just a little bit more suffering. And I promise

(01:05:31):
I'll be home about three am.

Speaker 1 (01:05:37):
Just another fifty years suffering. It's just another night on
the couch for you.

Speaker 2 (01:05:42):
Don't worry. So there you go. Man.

Speaker 11 (01:05:43):
That's how much you mean to me.

Speaker 2 (01:05:45):
That's my.

Speaker 11 (01:05:47):
She hates me.

Speaker 2 (01:05:48):
I love you. Wow. Yeah, that's right. Your relationships loss
has been your relationship with Matt's game.

Speaker 1 (01:05:56):
Well, I've always said I'm there to step in of it,
really there, but it really collapses.

Speaker 2 (01:06:01):
What with Gulane, you and Julane getting hooking up to
give it the for the last time. For the first time,
there's John Mellencamp. I'm a Mat and Jerry Show. This
is pre cougar Tune, the.

Speaker 6 (01:06:16):
Matt and Jerry Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (01:06:18):
And we've done a lot of segments over the years
on The Mat and Jerry Show, and one of the
staples of the Matt and Jerry Show it is a
segment called Penis or Genius.

Speaker 1 (01:06:26):
Now, Penis or Genius was a segment before I started
on radio Hateck and I was quite nervous about doing
commercial radio because I've never really done radio before, and
I had the worst imposter syndrome either. So I rang
up a good friend of mine, Dr Steve Simpson from
the UK University Physics Department, and we went out for
a drink on Ponsby Road and I was asking him
if he wanted to come on board, but he was

(01:06:47):
a highly paid person in the in the media world,
so he couldn't. But we we bashed out some segmuent
ideas and well what we bashed out some beers really,
but we came.

Speaker 2 (01:06:58):
Up with one.

Speaker 1 (01:06:59):
We came up with one, and that was Penis or genius,
and that goes to this day.

Speaker 2 (01:07:05):
That's right. And in the beginning of Penis l Genius
when we used to do it here because you did
it on your Matt Heath Drive show, didn't you.

Speaker 1 (01:07:11):
Yeah, Yeah, And it was with me and Steve Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:07:14):
And then it carried over into the Matt and Jerry Show.
And at the beginning of the Matt and Jewys Show,
when we first started doing eleven years ago, we used
to run a whole lot of admin at the top
of it, and I remember and I used to read
the admin and I remember one of the lines was
we used to say Penis or Genius was a segment
devised by doctor Steve Simpson from the Auckland University Physics
department to try and find the positives and negatives about

(01:07:35):
a person, place, object or thing or something like that
was part of the part of the intro and it's
been a very popular segment on the Matten Jury Show.
It's been the mainstay of Thursdays from about quarter past
eight to about eight twenty five.

Speaker 1 (01:07:49):
People have been voting on a number of topics. Especially
always been my favorite part of the week, mainly for
the drum fill that goes into the sting jem is
Penis or gin I find that very pleasing.

Speaker 2 (01:08:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:08:04):
Well, the other part about it that I told you
about eight years to get the what he has to say, Well,
it starts with.

Speaker 2 (01:08:10):
An it's you were gonna you were going to say that,
because at the end of every Penis or Genius there's
a little piece of a little piece of abmont and
and it says what the thing that we're talking about
will join.

Speaker 5 (01:08:26):
And it would always have a drum roll like this,
wouldn't it always? And then you'd do some kind of
am over topic.

Speaker 2 (01:08:32):
Intellied the people of hech you have spoken and Matt
Heath will join Tesla's Ai Tenacious d Wales and the
Olympics on the Penis side of the Cody Log.

Speaker 20 (01:08:44):
Congratulations, Matt, was I voted Dean Penis, I die alone,
shaming him for me burning in hell for all the Senate,
the left handed, the devil himself.

Speaker 1 (01:08:57):
It's a bit rough after. You can't argue with the science, man,
I guess if that's how the numbers have been crunched.
That was part of the intro jury was that it
was a scientific method. So you can't argue that. No, no, Well,
I'm a penis, I guess so, so Matt.

Speaker 2 (01:09:12):
To commemorate Penis or Genius one of the best segments
on radio, as voted by a number of people and
voted by our listeners over the years, We'd like to
present you with the Jerry Show the Cody Log, which
has gone to the rule of the studio. That is

(01:09:33):
huge and look at who the last genius name is
on them side. Congratulations, Exalted Glory on the right hand
of our Lord Savior Jesus Christ, Muhammad and the Buddha
from Northland. That's right, look at that quite religious. The

(01:09:54):
Cody Log with all of those things on it, what
else is on the genius side?

Speaker 12 (01:09:59):
The Queen Tom he's struggling to hold her.

Speaker 1 (01:10:02):
It's very heavy. Nurses, seagulls, cruise ships, South Africa, Spring.
We'll jump down a bit. Jimmy Wells made it. There
was a while back, Rugby Union, Argentina, billeting, Easter eggs, choirs,
Jenny from Forest Gump China, and Mother's Day and King

(01:10:23):
Charles and owning a house. There you go. There's millions
of them up there. But how beautiful is that? I
never believed it was a real thing, This cordie lock.

Speaker 2 (01:10:30):
There it is. It's a real thing affixed to the
wall the studio, and now it's going to be a
fixed to your wall at home.

Speaker 1 (01:10:36):
Hopefully Gez had a pulled down my house there. They
maybe got a heavy shopped and subcupboard somewhere up How
bloody good.

Speaker 2 (01:10:42):
But what that represents there is all of the stuff
that we have talked about. That's that when I look
at all those things, I think cheap as creepers. On
a radio show like this, you really cover a lot
of topics.

Speaker 1 (01:10:53):
In the moon ended up on the penis side. I'm
still surprised about that to this day. If you get
gods to man, jem, I'm not They're crazy.

Speaker 2 (01:11:16):
Hey thirty seven on the Mat and Jerry Show, the
last ever Matt and Jerry Show. It's Friday, the fourth
of October twenty twenty four.

Speaker 1 (01:11:24):
It is eight thirty seven Time for your radio. Heard
a news headlines with Jeremy Wells.

Speaker 2 (01:11:29):
How many news headliners that this is the last ever
Matt in Jerry show.

Speaker 1 (01:11:33):
Big news for me anyway, that's the biggest news for
me today. I'm not sure if the people in Duned
and it's the biggest news for them, but it's the
biggest news for me today.

Speaker 2 (01:11:40):
Probably is the biggest news for people in Dned.

Speaker 20 (01:11:42):
And that's why this s guy's crying, Matt crying in
the South for you.

Speaker 2 (01:11:45):
You have had a number of tickets that have that
have likened things or said that exactly that same thing there.

Speaker 1 (01:11:51):
Well, yeah, I was saying before the metaphor that my
headphones broke after eleven years clocks the stop, the clock stop,
never to chime again. When the old man died, as
the Grandfather's clock song says that heavened to my headphones
and this morning my washing machine exploded and a whole
lot of gunk came out of the filter and it
smelled like sewage. And I thought that was that was

(01:12:13):
a metaphor some hour as well, and maybe the sky
is crying and Dunedin one as well.

Speaker 2 (01:12:18):
Yeah, the sewage gunk one, Yeah, is the one that
really is stuck with me.

Speaker 1 (01:12:22):
Yeah, the filter and also just out the built up,
the build up of crap over eleven years, because that
that washing machine has eleven years up, ten years, eleven
years on.

Speaker 2 (01:12:31):
Here there's another there's another metaphor here as well, and
that is that I think after eleven years we've maybe
finally worked out how to do it, and even years
you finally worked out how to clean the bloody washing machine.

Speaker 1 (01:12:43):
Yeah, that is true. We have been doing our best
radio shows over the last couple of years. Yeah, so yeah,
sit there a long time in Training Wheels, wasn't it. Yeah, Well,
we talked about it with Laura the other time and
a training bra.

Speaker 2 (01:12:55):
But when we first started the show, we're essentially writing
an eighteen page script every day, and we'd come in
because we were we wanted to do it as well
as we possibly could.

Speaker 1 (01:13:04):
We care it meant a lot, and we were so
stoked to get our breakfast show and we really wanted
to make it good. But there's a funny thing in
radio is there's a level of trying that's too much,
and you end up just basically reading a play. Yeah,
and then you kind of almost get the best you
are the not it's not the less you care, it's

(01:13:25):
the less you worry. Yeah, in a way, you care
just as much, but you don't worry as much or something.

Speaker 5 (01:13:30):
How did things shift so so when you first started
doing the show eleven years ago as a team, He goes,
I know, you spent time on the phone with each
other at night and stuff like that, organizing the following
day and like you say, scripting. But was it just
a kind of gradual thing until you really until you
in the position where you are now where you go.

Speaker 1 (01:13:43):
What I think is funny over the years and radios,
I've realized I've been wrong at every step what I thought.
I thought the more the more segments, the more the
more organized things, the more planned it was, the better
it would be. But then you realize it's actually just
talking to friends and at your audience of friends, and
you're in a room with friends, and that's really what
people want in their lives. They want to hear a

(01:14:06):
genuine human connection. And it seems odd that you can
be talking and not be a human, but you can
spend a lot of time broadcasting as a non human,
and then when you become a human, that's I think
there's a technical tim finding your voice or something. But
you know, being who you are, it's surprisingly hard to
be who you are, and I think that took us,
like it took us about five or six years to

(01:14:28):
actually become who we are.

Speaker 2 (01:14:30):
Can I go back all the way to student radio
and I first met Matt in the very very late
two thousands, probably nineteen ninety nine, and we were doing
a TV show at the time called Have a Luxury
Suites and Conference for Silin. We did a segment on
that show about Matt's TV show that he was making
called Back the Why.

Speaker 1 (01:14:50):
On Triangle TV. It was a mainswield situation.

Speaker 2 (01:14:53):
It was on Triangle TV, like Community TV in Auckland
that was only broadcast in Auckland. And I'd never seen
the show before until we started doing a story out
and then I watched the show. I was like, oh
my god, this is the craziest show I've ever seen
in my life. It was a brilliant show, Like it
was brilliant that had stunts and had amazing pop culture references.
They put a huge amount of work into it for nothing,

(01:15:15):
like they went being paid, I.

Speaker 1 (01:15:17):
Don't think records fine.

Speaker 2 (01:15:19):
And he was just doing it for fun. And then
we so I met him then, and then we both
worked in student radio together on BFM here in Auckland,
and at that time we just both used to go
on the radio and just talk, you know. And then interestingly,
over the years then Madn ended up working here at

(01:15:39):
radiohde Ken And at that point you were starting to
put a lot of segments together, and your show went
from just being talking, which it originally was on student radio.
Do you remember you and kras just talking absolute rubbish
but it was so entertaining too, then constructing quite complicated
radio shows. And then interestingly that the circle has come

(01:16:00):
back around where it's there where we're sort of let
a lot of that go and we're back around at
the beginning, which is interesting.

Speaker 1 (01:16:08):
Yeah, you're kind of too scared to be yourself for
a while. So your lacker on about twenty five coats
of irony to try and hide who you are, and
then you realize that's just a lot of effort to
make worse radio and make worse broadcasts.

Speaker 2 (01:16:22):
Yeah, and in those original days with the eighteen page document,
where not only would we broadcast together for three hours,
then we'd spend time writing to each other on this
live document, on this Google doc. Yeah, this is a
tune absolute night Ranger on the Last ever Meet in
Jerry show.

Speaker 6 (01:16:40):
The time has come the Matt and Jerry Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (01:16:46):
That is night Ranger, the last ever Matt and Jerry Show.
Matt just had to go out for a quick whek.

Speaker 1 (01:16:52):
We got the basis for a week at the eight
o'clock and it's been such an emotional morning. I forgot
the basics of radio, which is your eight o'clock we
tell you.

Speaker 2 (01:17:00):
What I'll miss, I'll miss, I'll miss standing, you know
in the morning, you coming in and having a chat
to you at sex and then we're just before sex
and then having it, and then at seven o'clock we
always go out and have a cup of coffee, and
at ight we have a cup of coffee and we
do the same thing. We've got the same routine every
day and I remember when we first started doing the show,
someone had told me April Ami. That's right, it was

(01:17:21):
April or Amir. April Remia has said to me, whatever
you do, never drink I mean, this is advice coming
from April Romir. She'd said, if people out there will
remember April Romia, she used to read the sports on
TV and on the news, and she said to me,
don't ever have coffee before you're going to broadcams.

Speaker 1 (01:17:41):
Why because apparently he hit us on the tea for
a while. You said it wasn't great for your words.

Speaker 2 (01:17:46):
That's what I'm gonna say, Like she said that you
hate tea. You can't read anything once you've had coffee
because your brain and your mouth are working at a
different time. So never have coffee in the morning if
you're broadcasting. And I took April Ramia's words as gospel,
I mean, why I don't.

Speaker 1 (01:18:01):
But that's an ongoing thing for me. I always believe
the last person that someone's told me one hundred percent.

Speaker 2 (01:18:06):
Yeah, and so the so the beginning parts of our show,
I remember we used to drink tea. We didn't even
have coffee, And luckily then after about three years we
realized that April Ama was speaking out a hole in
her ass, and turns out that that was that wasn't true.

Speaker 1 (01:18:22):
Yeah, yeah, it wasn't. And now we've been pounding the
instant coffees like this, no tomorrow.

Speaker 2 (01:18:26):
Yeah totally.

Speaker 1 (01:18:28):
So this is the last show, yeah, this, this is
the last show. Hey, so I I reckon, I'll mess
up saying some some some nice words. So so, with
the help of the wonderful Ruder here, we've put together
a little bit of a thing. Well Rude's done all

(01:18:49):
the work as usual, but I'll take some credit in it.
So we'll play I'll play this, Okay. There was no
easy way to say this. I'm leaving the Matt and
Jerry as show and Radiohardaki. We've been doing the Matt
and Jerry Show for over ten years. I just found
out it was eleven. This has been the best job

(01:19:10):
anyone could ever hope to have. There are so many
great memories that there are too many to mention. I
come in here and I laugh for four hours every day.
I look forward to coming in here every day and
seeing you guys and talking to everyone listening all over
the country and the world. Meshy and Ruda, I love
you guys. You're both so talented and fun to be around.
I know the show will go on without me, and

(01:19:31):
I'll be listening to you. You're the best dudes anyone
could hope to work with. To everyone at Radiohardechey, thank
you so much for always having my back. We have
such a great crew here now and so many excellent
creative people that have come and gone over the years,
a much lower percentage of our souls than any place
I have ever worked as. For you, Jeremy Wells, my
good friend, thank you for being just the best possible offsider.

(01:19:51):
I do like me good hope for I love you man,
and as a co host and a human ten years
together on the show eleven I found out and we've
never had an argument. Boy boy, have we talked louder
crap to each other over the years on here, and
so much more crap off here. When we started the show,
our kids were just little and my mum was still alive. Now,
Miss Kuran, you go are huge, and Charlie and Barry

(01:20:12):
at Berg and look we've gone through all the ups
and downs together. That's crazy. Even lessimgolders who we started with,
she's all grown up mare and has two kids. Anyway, Buddy,
every day you make me laugh. You're bloody brilliant. Mate.
Not seeing every day will be a huge gap. As
for the listeners, thank you so much. So many of
you have come up to me over the years and
ensured you love the show. You've been as big a

(01:20:32):
part of the show as I've been. The jokes and
comments you've seen through every day on the text machine
are generally much clearer than anything I could come up with,
and I off and steal them anyway. I love you all,
bless blessed, blessed. Everything must come to an end, and
my time at Radiohodechi and the Mat and Jerry Show
is coming to an end. I've enjoyed it all. I
feel so lucky to have been the Mat and the
Mat and Jerry Show for so long. Thank you so

(01:20:53):
much and I love you all. Matty seven, you'll take
away the mat from Jammy.

Speaker 4 (01:21:04):
Anyway you seem busy, I'll let you go.

Speaker 16 (01:21:07):
Woo no, may please.

Speaker 4 (01:21:10):
Don't go, please please please give me a taste of key.

Speaker 1 (01:21:14):
We love you, Bye bye, Nazy. Then now you'll take
away the heath from home Ucky all right? Then okay, woo, no, mabe,
please don't go Okay bye.

Speaker 2 (01:21:37):
She's an emotional time.

Speaker 1 (01:21:39):
Mm hmmm. So yeah, this show's gone way too fast. Yeah,
here'sn't it sweet has gone first trying to enjoy the moments,
but the moments are whipping away. Yeah, like sands through
the air glass other breaks of our lives.

Speaker 2 (01:22:02):
Weirdly enough, eleven years is a long time, yeah, you know.
And I think when someone leaves all of a sudden,
when someone's going away, or you know, someone leaves your
life in whatever way, you reflect on so much stuff.
And I mean eleven years. If someone had said to
me when we first started doing the show in twenty fourteen,
if someone said to me, you know, you guys are

(01:22:23):
going to be doing the show for eleven years, I
would be like I would have I would have been
prepared to bet my house that that would not happen.
You know, that is such a long time. And and yeah,
eleven years, boy. And the interesting thing for me is
that you know, in that time, you shar so much stuff.

(01:22:46):
You don't only shar the stuff on air, which the
listener's here, And I'm sure that's why there's so many
messages coming in because You've shared so much of your
life with people, and that's that's that's quite a big thing.
But also there's been a huge amount that she had
off here. You get to know someone incredibly well. You
go through everything with people you know, and and you

(01:23:09):
know you have been a great person to go through
things with.

Speaker 1 (01:23:13):
Thanks man.

Speaker 2 (01:23:14):
I couldn't asked for a better person, really, because you're funny,
you're smart, you've got great advice. You make me laugh
like no one else. You've got a brilliant eye for
the absurd, Like you see an absurd thing from a
mile away. It just it just presents itself to you
so quickly. And a big part of this show as

(01:23:37):
well is coming up with ideas for commercial partnerships, because
that's how we get paid. That's that's why we exist ultimately.

Speaker 1 (01:23:45):
Thanks Bunning, straight y, and you always.

Speaker 2 (01:23:48):
Have an idea like you you're You're the sharpest person
I've ever met, and so it's been a great pleasure.
But also you know, through that time you grow with someone.

(01:24:10):
And so there's a message here from your boys, because
I know what they mean to you, and so let's
play that.

Speaker 17 (01:24:22):
Hey, dad, it's your sons. We wanted to congratulate you
on your nixt steps. You've been in radio most of
our lives, and most of that it's been at hodarchy,
like the Matt Heath Drive Show back when me and
Bad's from in primary school.

Speaker 14 (01:24:33):
Yeah, you got Will Ferrell to record us a message
as doctor Rick Marshall from the Financial bomb Land for
the last at our time favorite movie back before your
Breakfast Show, when you could actually watch a movie on
the couch without falling asleep. Hopefully now you should be
able to do that.

Speaker 17 (01:24:49):
Yeah, and after that and me and Barry's last years
a primary school and going into intermediate when you join
the Breakfast Show and eventually from the ACC like you'd
always love crickets. You know, this was a natural step,
and that was seen in Lockdown when your bowl ball
after ball at me and rarely Barry and all in
preparation for some friendly match with the ACC. And the

(01:25:13):
next day, I guess you'd show us how highlights your
highlights of maybe catching a couple of balls or some
half decent bowls, some good shots here and the other.

Speaker 14 (01:25:22):
Owen, thanks for showing me some of your favorite movies
and shows like of course Robot carp starts a Troopers
Star Wars and obviously they've been taver it. I hope
you can still keep up the same punishing chat as
you show your audience, and you know you show us,
at least in this new format.

Speaker 17 (01:25:39):
I love you Pop, Yeah, I love you Dad, And
good luck with this transition of audience, new genre. Almost
love dad.

Speaker 1 (01:25:49):
That's such lovely kids, such deep voices of these days.

Speaker 2 (01:25:52):
Well that's the thing that have grown up. You know,
when we first started doing the show, they were little kids,
and so I've watched you develop into and this is
the thing for me. You're a great radio host, you're
a great TV maker, you have great ideas, but the
best thing you are is.

Speaker 19 (01:26:09):
A great dead. Like thanks, you're an amazing dead. You're
an amazing dead and then an amazing for me. This
thing that we're about to play now is says everything
about everything that you aren't. It says everything about what
we've been through in the last eleven years. So let's

(01:26:30):
play this.

Speaker 18 (01:26:31):
It's not time to make a change. Just relast.

Speaker 1 (01:26:39):
You're still jump.

Speaker 18 (01:26:40):
That's your phone.

Speaker 3 (01:26:42):
You show Munch you have to do.

Speaker 18 (01:26:46):
Find a girl, shattle down if you want, you can, Mad,
You'll get me. I am but I'm happy I was
once like you one now and I know it. Lolleysy

(01:27:09):
to be came when you fight, shop thing you your
call you that time, share down jello, that kind think
of everything. You just behead to marble, thank your day.

Speaker 2 (01:27:31):
Oh that's Charlie singing is a eight year old. Yeah,
we're a seven year old father and son playing your
tars beautiful.

Speaker 1 (01:27:40):
Probably the last time I cried this is as much
as when me and Charlie went to see Kit Stephen's
Life and sang that together with their arms alreatly.

Speaker 9 (01:27:50):
So on.

Speaker 2 (01:27:51):
Behalf of all the listeners on, behalf of Radio hurd
key on, behalf of your family, your friends, everybody. Thank
you very much. Thanks for the last eleven years. It's
been magnificent. Every part of it has been magnificent and
nothing will ever be the same again. So from the
bottom of my heart and from the bottom of everybody

(01:28:12):
else's heart here, everybody that's worked on the show over
the years, thank you for what you've done. Thanks for
giving what you've given. It's been a real thing.

Speaker 1 (01:28:21):
Yeah, Well, love you guys, and so grateful for all
of it.

Speaker 2 (01:28:26):
So just so very grateful for all and we wish
you all the best with everything that you do, all
the best. So this is it, This is it all right?
Love you guys.

Speaker 1 (01:28:45):
Searching for.

Speaker 2 (01:28:47):
Sugar Out and I'll.

Speaker 1 (01:28:50):
Be listening as a fan to the show from now on.
I'll be listening every day as you guys go on,
and you'll be fantastic as you always are.

Speaker 2 (01:29:00):
I'm going to put your number into the text machine
so I know that it's your.

Speaker 1 (01:29:02):
Number, Sue, blame the blame. It's hello. I'm Matt Heath.

(01:29:23):
You've been listening to the Matt and Jerry Radio Highlights podcast.
Thanks for that. Right now you can listen to our
other one, the Daily Bespoke podcast, which you will absolutely
love anyway, set to download, like, subscribe and review all
those great things. It really helps myself and Jerry, Mash
and ruder. If you want to discuss anything raised in
this pod, check out the Conclave, a Matt and Jerry

(01:29:44):
Facebook discussion group. And whilst I'm plugging things, I've got
a weekly newsletter now, Matdeath dot substack dot com. So
why not go there and subscribe? That would really really
really get me excited if you did that all right
then anyway, you seem Busymet dot substeck dot com. All right,
then give them a taste of care. We bless bliss bliss. Okay,

(01:30:06):
then alright, then okay,