Lilly Friend Project

Lilly meets three people who've figured out how to create their own spaces in New York City. Ankham left Laos to find freedom in K-Town, Samuel turned his recording studio into something sacred in the Bronx, and Leah navigated her way back to Judaism on her own terms in Williamsburg. Plus, Lilly realizes her questionnaire answers about strawberry soju shots might reveal more about friendship compatibility than she initially thought...

Lilly steps back to let her friends do the talking about setting limits in relationships. Sustaita explains why she sees people as chapters, Emma describes leaving Christianity and losing her best friend to marriage during the pandemic, Thomas reveals his new approach to planning trips to Italy, and Sundara reflects on seventeen years of fighting and making up with Lilly. Plus, someone finally explains what happens when you're the ...

Lilly meets Sam Singh, who notices her questionnaire offered "friendship without pretenses", and Siegfried, who worries the whole thing might be an Eric Andre show prank [00:01:00]. Both reveal what it's like to be the reliable friend everyone calls during a crisis, the emotional labor of always showing up for others, and the moment you realize you might be giving more than you're getting. Plus, Sam is a regular at a karaoke club a...

Lilly explores the quiet endings that happen without ceremony—no "we need to talk" conversations, no dividing of stuff, just silence. Frances describes a friendship that slowly drifted apart through mutual assumptions, Renata shares how her sister-like best friend disappeared for two years over something that wasn't even an issue, and Daniel finally explains why he ghosted Lilly after college. Plus, Friedrich Nietzsche's philosophy...

Lilly becomes obsessed with Em, whose thoughtful questionnaire answers about ginger ale at the Natural History Museum and acid-induced existential crises made her seem like the perfect friend—until she completely ghosted. While analyzing the 70 questionnaire responses she received, Lilly realizes the project was as much about understanding herself as finding friends. Plus, someone admits they filled out the questionnaire because Li...

Lilly meets three people who've found their place by standing apart. Lucas explains how American cities are designed to atomize people and shares his Forrest Gump walking moment, Marley discusses riot grrrl feminism and why she's not an ugly man respecter, and Erika reveals what it's like being the black sheep who moved out during the pandemic. Plus, Lucas dreams of goats in West Virginia, and everyone agrees that sometimes the cle...

A mashup of the funniest and most memorable moments from all the interviews. Christian explains how he spent a year and a half in a band called The Roasters without knowing what they were roasting, Frances admits her personal brand is compulsive lying but in a fun way, and Thomas thought the whole thing might be Scientology but was ready to join anyway. Plus, someone found an apartment on Craigslist with no photos based purely on v...

In the final episode, Lilly tries to answer the question she's been avoiding: what is connection? She calls random people including a poet, her mom, a barista, a therapist, a Vegas wedding chapel, and accidentally interviews mayoral candidate Brad Lander on election day. After seventy questionnaire responses and twenty-four interviews, Lilly reflects on whether she actually made friends or just performed an elaborate art piece arou...

Lilly records from bed to share what happened after releasing the podcast. Her 93-year-old grandpa refuses the friend project t-shirt because he needs to keep certain people at the veteran's home at a distance, her uncle won't even wear it to sleep, and a family miscommunication spiral ensues. Plus, the New York Times features her flyers but doesn't bring more listeners (just cosmic validation), Lilly realizes the flyers and podcas...

Ren found a friend application on Instagram at midnight, filled out all 40 questions, went to sleep at 2am, and a few weeks later got an email saying she'd been selected. Now she's back. In the first talk show episode, Lilly and Ren cover their friendship origin story, the experience of having a different personality in a second language, a karmic relationship that has not improved despite many talks, and two questions called in by...

Lilly talks to Lily Lady and Maya, two escorts who are friends, about the friendships that form when you already speak the same language. What it means to be in a hotel room with someone who knows exactly which hotel it is. What it looks like to work alongside a friend, and what you see when you do. Then Lilly talks to Jennifer Worley, author of Neon Girls, about the women she met at the Lusty Lady, a San Francisco peep show where ...

This episode is about the male loneliness epidemic. I know. I spent about a month talking to men about it and kept noticing the same thing: you can't approach it directly. You have to come at it sideways, usually as a joke, which is both the only way in and the reason no one gets very far.

What I kept seeing is that the joke is doing two things at once...