Long Distance, Bit Weird
Comedians and long-distance lovers Sooz Kempner (Doctor Who’s Doom’s Day, Dinner With the Parents) and Michael Balazo (Schitt’s Creek, Evil Men) live on different continents. Seeing as they spend hours each day talking on FaceTime, they thought they might as well start a podcast and monetize their relationship. Each week, Sooz and Michael talk to a comedian guest friend from Britain or Canada about life, love and weird stuff.
Episodes
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week it's time for us to go deep inside the world of Nigel Farage. From plane crashes to election losses to constantly getting covered in milkshake...this guy knows how to live a life! So much so that we've spread him out over two episodes. Mmmm spread...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
Are you ready to FARM? You'd better be, because this week's episode is about the wild and erotic history of British agricultural shows. Why? Because Sooz and Michael recently attended one, and it featured top tier livestock, a band playing Rolling Sto...
Over on our Patreon we reviewed Vietnam War epic The Deer Hunter, a film Michael had never seen until this week. In this preview we are discussing various actors who were offered the role of the phantom in the terrible 2004 Phantom of the Opera movie. To hear the full hour-long episode (you know, the actual review) and gain access to all of our exclusive content please head to our Patreon. Thanks!
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
After an interruption of services due to the Edinburgh Fringe, LDBW returns to the airwaves with a very nice episode. Sooz and Michael talk about Edinburgh, Dolly Parton, Tim Curry, a big night out in Reigate, life as pub quiz champions, and why it's ...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week LDBW returns to a favourite subject, as Sooz educates Michael on Michael Jackson's 1988 "Moonwalker" film, and the subsequent 1990 video game "Michael Jackson's Moonwalker." What did Joe Pesci and Michael talk about on the Moonwalker set? Is...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. It's like something out of a Philip K. Dick novel.
This week Sooz introduces Michael to the classic British sitcom Only Fools and Horses, which ran from 1981-2003 over seven series and sixteen Christmas specials. What's the show about? Why do millions...
We're watching a clip from Alley Cats, the new animated series where cats swear. This is just a preview of course. To hear the full hour-long episode (which includes discussions of the alleged decline of Mr Gervais and his work, along with some chat about Katie Price) and gain access to all of our exclusive content please head to our Patreon. Thanks!
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week, in the run-up to an exciting British by-election, Sooz tells Michael about the satirical political figure known as Count Binface, the latest in a long line of British novelty candidates like Lord Buckethead and Screaming Lord Sutch. If you though...
This is just a preview of course. To hear the full hour-long episode (which includes discussions of the Tate Brothers going to jail) and gain access to all of our exclusive content please head to our Patreon. Thanks!
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week, Sooz and Michael give an unvarnished review of Sir Christopher Nolan's cinematic adaptation of The Odyssey. What were the highlights? Where did Sir Christopher mess up big time? How gross was it inside the Trojan Horse? And should there have been...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
Once more, due to international scheduling conflicts and diplomatic difficulties, we're releasing a recent Patreon bonus episode here on the main feed. Enjoy as Michael reads two red hot letters to W...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week, due to international scheduling difficulties, we're releasing a recent Patreon bonus episode here on the main feed. Enjoy, as Sooz tells Michael the hilarious/disgusting story of the Great Stink of 1858, when unusually hot weather exacerbated the sten...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week, Michael tells Sooz the bizarre story of Keith Richards' 1977 arrest for heroin possession in Toronto. Facing up to seven years in Canadian prison, Keith's troubles could have ended the Rolling Stones... until a fan's intervention convinced a judge to ...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
Oasis. Blur. Dodgy. Who were the true winners of the so-called Battle of Britpop that rocked the UK in August of 1995?* This week, Sooz tells Michael about the time that Oasis and Blur released pop singles on the very same day. It's a story fuelled by cigarettes...
In this bonus episode, Sooz and Michael are taking a look at the weirdly unerotic Metro sex columns, available in London's favourite free newspaper. This is just a preview of course. To hear the full episode and gain access to all of our exclusive content please head to our Patreon. Thanks!
***
ANNOUNCEMENT
ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS - Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded ...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week Sooz and Michael are together on one of the nicest couches in Britain! You won't believe your ears as they recount their exciting week together, featuring everything from slugs to surprise parties to England's triumphant World Cup opening game. It's go...
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. OK.
This week Sooz tells Michael the unbelievable story of England's immortal football anthem Three Lions. How did it happen? Why is it so suffused with melancholy? Will the guys ever record a new version? And what is Vindaloo? Listen to find out!
But first: Mic...
Hello LDBW listeners! With the start of the 2026 World Cup just hours away, we decided to adorn your podcast feed with Michael Balazo's new song "Canada is Balls." This song is designed to unite Canada as the country prepares to win the World Cup.
There's even a slick music video for "Canada is Balls," with editing and graphics by Sooz Kempner. CLICK HERE TO WATCH IT!
Good luck, everybody!
Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. Please give generously.
This week Sooz and Michael welcome veteran quizmaster/brother Terrance Balazo to the show to talk about all things pub quiz. When did they start? Has technology made cheating inevitable? And why do pub quizzes make certain nerds lose thei...
In this week's bonus episode, Sooz tells Michael all about The Great Stink of 1858, when the River Thames was so full of sewage and the sun was so hot that London got too stinky and parliament couldn't operate. Bit on the nose, lads! Literally. This is just a preview of course. To hear the full episode and gain access to all of our exclusive content please head to our Patreon. Thanks!
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