If I Were the Devil: The War On Love Podcast
You know what God's Word says about you - but somewhere between your head and your heart, something gets lost. Welcome to If I Were the Devil: The War on Love — a podcast for Christian men and women navigating the real, often messy intersection of faith, inner healing, and relationships. Whether you're carrying wounds from relationship betrayal, battling shame and lies about yourself, or simply wondering why knowing the truth still doesn't make you feel free - you're in the right place. And you're not crazy for feeling that gap. There's actually a reason for it. I'm Danielle (I go by Dani) Lew therapist, certified professional coach, and someone who knows this territory from the inside. I met Jesus at 19, fell in love with Him and His love for me as a Father, Savior, God, and Friend. And yet, I still spent years struggling to break free from addictions and step fully into the Identity He called me into! What I didn't know was the integration between body, mind, and spiritual health and all are important! I didn't learn that at home, in church, or even in Graduate School! Though personal growth and pursuit of that my mind and nervous system needed to actually heal, not just learn more Scripture. That discovery changed everything. Today, after more than 20 years of sobriety and every form of healing I could get my hands on, I walk daily in genuine freedom — from anxiety, from shame, from waiting for the other shoe to drop — and I actually know and believe I am loved and safe with God. That freedom is available to you too. And this podcast exists to show you the way there. Each episode brings together neuroscience, Scripture, and hard-won personal experience to help you heal the wounds that keep you stuck — in your relationship with God, with yourself, and with the people you love most. We cover Christian inner healing, attachment wounds, nervous system healing, forgiveness, spiritual warfare, and the very real war the enemy wages on your ability to love and be loved. No spiritual bypassing. No easy answers. Just truth, tools, and someone who has walked this road walking it with you. 👉 Start with Episode 1 — the topics build on each other, and this journey is better from the beginning. Want to reach out? Send me an email to hello@rootedrefinedandrestored.com
Episodes
Show Notes:
In this episode, I'm wrapping up our series on shame by connecting the dots between shame and attachment theory - because if I were the devil, this is exactly where I'd attack: using our earliest attachment wounds to keep us disconnected from who we are in Christ.
I share a personal moment from this past week where an unexpected trigger surfaced old shame messages from childhood, a...
Last Sunday, I froze. I was supposed to open our church service, and instead I sat there - racing thoughts, confusion, embarrassment, shame, the urge to run and hide.
In this episode, I'm walking you through exactly what happened, how I responded in the moments and days afte...
I was Frozen: A Raw Story of Spiritual Warfare, Attachment Wounds & Speaking Up
In this episode I'm getting real and a little unfiltered!
Over the past 24 to 36 hours I walked through what I can only describe as an emotional storm - one that peeled back layers I thought I had already healed.
I'm sharing it with you because I believe vulnerability is where real healing, and real teaching, happens.
We're continuing our series on ...
If I Were the Devil: The War on Love EPISODE SHOW NOTES The Four Entry Points of Shame Why the Enemy Targets Your Identity, Not Just Your Behavior Episode Summary Hey friend, it's Dani. In this episode, I'm picking up right where we left off two weeks ago in our series on shame. If you missed that episode, the short version is this: shame keeps us in hiding. Today I go deeper into what shame actually feels like in the body, where ...
Recorded: Tuesday, July 21
I know, I know. It's not Monday. And honestly, that's kind of the point of this whole episode.
This episode closes out the spiritual warfare series I've been walking through, following the two episodes where my friend Katherine shared her testimony. I know some of this has gotten heavy, and for some of you, it's gotten controversial. I want to say up front, that's okay. You might hear things you haven't heard before,...
I am SO grateful for this episode, y'all. Katherine came back to finish sharing her testimony, and let me tell you — the depth of vulnerability here is a gift.
I open this episode the way I always do: if I were the enemy, if I hated God, how would I go after Him? I walk through Acts 16 — Paul, Lydia, and the slave girl with the spirit of divination — because I want us to remember that the enemy doesn't show up loo...
In Part 6 of our Spiritual Warfare series, I sat down with my friend Katheryn for our very first co-hosted episode - and we will be co-hosting again for a PART 2 of her Story- This one is a "set up" for our next episode into Katheryn's testimony down a dark, twisty road into the New Age Movement!
Kathryn is a woman with a radical testimony: raised Catholic, desperate for healing, and slowly drawn into crystals, energy work, t...
Happy Monday, friend. We are five episodes deep into the Spiritual Warfare series and I am not slowing down - because there is still SO much to cover on this topic! And the more I read, study, and discuss with others, I feel more and more passion and conviction to share what I am!
In this episode, I'm building on the military framework (because THIS IS WAR!) we've been working through and getting into two powerful strategic c...
Wolves in the Church: Spiritual Warfare at the Operational Level | War on Love Podcast
This week we're continuing our spiritual warfare series -and this episode might step on some toes. I'm going there anyway, because truth spoken in love is still love.
You were never meant to fight this war blindly.
If life has felt like an unrelenting series of attacks - the persistent shame, the fear that hits out of nowhere, the bitterness that won't lift, the lies that somehow feel like truth - there's a reason. You're in a war that ...
EPISODE TITLE: Why You Can't Love Like Christ Yet — And What Your Wounds Have to Do With It (How Fiery Trials Lead Us Into More Christ-like Love)
This week I'm doing something a little different - I'm sharing a message I gave at church on May 31st, 2026, for our wor...
War on Love Podcast
Episode Summary
Spiritual Warfare Series | Know Your Enemy: Who Is Satan & How He OperatesDo you know who your real enemy is — and how he actually operates?
In this episode of War on Love, Danielle opens the second installment of the Spiritual Warfare series by tackling one of the most foundational — and most misunderstood — questions in the Christian faith: Who is the enemy, really?
Roote...
If I Were the Devil: The War on Love
Spiritual Warfare, False Doctrine & Why Prayer Alone Isn't EnoughSpiritual Warfare Series | Episode 1
What if the greatest trick the enemy is pulling on the church right now isn’t convincing people he doesn’t exist — but convincing believers they don’t need to do anything beyond praying more?
In this episode, Danielle kicks off a brand-new series on spiritual warfar...
Heart Conditions Series | If I Were the Devil: The War on Love
with Danielle Lew (Dani), LCSW, APSATS-CCPS
What do pornography, hoarding, endless scrolling, and emotional affairs all have in common? According to Scripture — and the enemy's playbook — they are all expressions of the same ancient heart problem: lust, covetousness, and distraction. In this rich, scripture-heav...
Episode Summary
In this final installment of the Hardened Heart series (finally, whew!) we explore what a hardened heart looks like in modern life — in our relationships, our culture, and ourselves — and offers practical, faith-based steps toward healing.
The episode opens by grounding the discussion in the Greatest Commandment: to love God with all your heart, soul, and mind. A hardened heart, the host argues, makes th...
Hardened Heart Part 4: Impact on Faith & Church If I Were the Devil: The War on Love — Episode Summary
In this episode, we explore how a hardened heart directly impacts our ability to fulfill the greatest commandment - to love God, ourselves, and others. Drawing from Scripture, real-life examples, and recovery principles, this episode breaks down what a hardened heart looks like in both believers and non-believers, and wh...
Episode Summary:
In Part 3 of the Hardened Heart series, we deep dive into what hardens our hearts and why it matters for our walk with God.
In this episode, you'll learn:
- How idolatry - including money, relationships, status, and even our children -slowly hardens the heart by shaping us into what we worship
- The danger of spiritual neglect and daily drift, and how small choices compound over time to pull us away from God ...
Heart Conditions Series, Part 2 | War on Love Podcast with Danielle Lew
Have you ever wondered why some people seem emotionally shut down, spiritually disconnected, or stuck in the same painful patterns no matter what they try? In this episode of the War on Love podcast, Danielle Lew — Licensed Clinical Social Worker, APSATS-trained betrayal trauma coach, and f...
If you have ever asked, "what is a hard heart"? This multi-part episode is for you! You will recognize how the devil uses woundedness and patterns of the world, and even religion to take hearts captive, keeping people captive to this way of being. In this first Part I share an overview of where the hardened heart shows up in the Bible, and some causes, and what dangers of having a hard heart if you are trying to love like Christ!&n...
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