Define with Denise

What if the kids aren’t the only ones learning?

In this episode of Define with Denise, I sit down with my friend and former colleague Kody Harms — BCBA, third-generation educator, co-founder and clinical director of Curated Family Therapeutics, and dad to Oscar.

We start with one question: What is school actually for?

From there, the conversation becomes much bigger than school. We talk about the pressure teachers and help...

We’re the generation raising kids while also looking back at how we were raised.

In this episode, I share pieces of my experience growing up in a Vietnamese immigrant family—from achievement and expectations to sacrifice, love, conflict, and all the things that weren’t always talked about.

Because generational healing doesn’t have to mean blaming our parents or doing the complete opposite of what they did.

It c...

Our generation is trying really hard to raise kids differently.

We talk more about emotions. We know more about trauma. We want our kids to feel heard, safe, and understood.

But sometimes knowing what we don't want to repeat doesn't automatically tell us what to do instead.

So for this episode of DEFINE with Denise, I brought on my friend and fellow behavior analyst Charles to talk about the questions parents are actually wondering&md...

Most of us already know what healthy eating looks like.

We know protein is important.
We know vegetables are good for us.
We know drinking water matters.

So why is nutrition still one of the hardest behaviors to change?

Nutrition isn't about food. It's about behavior.

In this episode, we're looking beyond calories, diets, and willpower to explore what our eating habits might actually be communicating.

Together, we'll explore:

• &...

Fear has a way of convincing us that we need to feel ready before we take the next step.

Ready to have the conversation.
Ready to apply for the job.
Ready to start therapy.
Ready to ask for help.
Ready to make the change.

But what if that's never how change actually works?

In today's episode, I'm sharing one of the biggest mindset shifts I've had after navigating panic attacks, OCD, anxiety, and one of the hardest seasons ...

Over the last few episodes, we've explored why behavior change is hard, why our patterns make sense, and why knowing what to do isn't always enough.

But this week, I wanted to press pause and share something a little more personal.

In this episode, I'm sharing the story behind DEFINE—how growing up in a Vietnamese immigrant family, discovering behavior analysis, navigating my own mental health journey, and learning to redefine ...

Have you ever caught yourself repeating a pattern you fully understand... and thought, I literally know better than this?

You can identify your child's triggers. See when your client is starting to avoid. Tell your friend exactly why they keep going back to the same situation.

But then you stay up scrolling when you're exhausted. Say yes when you mean no. Avoid the email that's been on three different to-do lists. Or hear your childh...

If Knowing Was Enough, Change Would Be Easy
Why We Know What to Do... But Still Struggle to Do It

Have you ever found yourself saying...

"I'll start Monday."

"This time will be different."

"I know what I need to do... so why can't I seem to do it?"

If you've ever felt the gap between knowing and doing, you're not alone.

In the first official episode of DEFINE, we're exploring one of the biggest misconceptions about behavior change: th...

Welcome to DEFINE.

If you've ever wondered why change feels so hard, why we repeat patterns we promised we'd never repeat, or how to create meaningful change without losing the values that matter most, you're in the right place.

In this short introduction, I share why I created DEFINE, what you can expect from the podcast, and the questions we'll be exploring together each week.

Drawing from behavior science, psychology, Acceptance an...