The Rizz - 1089

On this episode of The Thought Shower, Intern John talks about CHUES-Day and how to know if someone is trying to RIZZ you up for bad reasons

Intern John and Your Morning Show are having their first ever CHUES-Day dog adoption event in honor of John's dog, Chuy! They have teamed with Lost Dog and Cat Rescue to find homes for some amazing animals! Saturday 4/26 2:30-4:30p @ Hyde Social in Arlington

Every week Intern John discusses adulting, dating, radio life, and more! You can follow Intern John on social media: @InternJohnRadio. You can listen to past episodes at TheThoughtShower.com

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
And a happy Wednesday friend. Welcome to the thoughts Shower.
Internshiohn is my name. Been a good week so far,
certainly a week where it seemed fast and slow, if
that makes sense. I'm still covering from Louisville this past weekend,
which was a lot of fun, although I feel really bad.
There was a lot of storms kind of leading up

(00:22):
to me getting there, and now there's flooding throughout the
city which is very sad, and including buffalo trays where
like they make my favorite bourbons, they're underwaters. So certainly
sending thoughts out to the fine folks of Kentucky. You
know I love you. If there's anything we can do,
please DM me at WYMUS Radio if you missed it.

(00:43):
I also announced this on Monday, but April twenty six,
we're doing our first ever Tuesday dog adoption, which I'm
very excited for. It's going to be Saturday, April twenty six,
Hide Social. We team with the lost dog and can't rescue.
The goal here is to get as many animals adopted
as possible in honor of my boy Chewi. I'm very excited.

(01:07):
You know, it's been a very hard three months and
I'm gonna lie to you. It's been miserable every day.
At some point something happens that causes me to break down.
But you know, again, like I mentioned in the show,
is that I don't want him to have passed for nothing.
You know, he certainly made a huge impact on so

(01:28):
many people that it would be in my mind, a
waste not use his impact for good. So if we
can help some dogs get adopted and you know, keep
Chewy's legacy going to me, I'm very excited for that.
Would let us see you April twenty six, hide Social
in Clarendon for the adoption two thirty four to thirty.
I'm excited for this weekend too, So I still have

(01:51):
I've yet to unpack from Louisville. It is what it is,
you know, you travel, then you get help me like, ah,
don't want to get back to like actual work. But
this weekend, So Friday, I fly to Nollans that's New
Orleans to meet my brother and my dad. It's gonna
be kind of cool because it's my brother's guess is
kind of his birthday weekend. His birthday was on Monday.

(02:13):
But I guess like this would be a cool way
for us to celebrate and uh, and my dad would
do like a boy's trip because we're going to a
cigar convention. You're asking yourself, John, what happens as cigar convention? Well,
I'll tell you I went to one before in Las Vegas,
and that had to be twenty twenty twenty one. Maybe

(02:34):
maybe it was twenty twenty. Whenever Connor McGregor's last fight was,
because it happened to be that weekend, I was like, Oh,
might as well go to the fight, see what's up,
YadA YadA. But basically it's just kind of like all
the cigar sellers in the world basically kind of come
together and put out like what their new stuff is.
So I'm excited to go with my dad and brother
and to I do that. I was talking to my
mom yesterday and I was like, the best part about

(02:56):
this trip is we don't really have like nothin. I
have a lot to do, but there's no except schedule,
you know what I mean. Like we can go relax, get
some cigars, and enjoy ourselves. And it's been a lot
of fun. It's kind of it worked out because we're
big college hockey fans and the college Hockey Championship is

(03:17):
this weekend in Saint Louis, my brother lives. So he
originally talked about like, well, maybe we should know hold
off on the cigar event because what if Minnesota is
playing for the college hockey Championship, we could go to
Saint Louis. Well they lost, so that kind of worked out.
I'm excited for that. Again. It's also kind of the
precursor then, because in May, my dad and I go
to Europe together, which that's gonna be exciting, so exciting times.

(03:39):
This is like the again, the trial for it, but
exciting times. Nonetheless, let me get to this for your Wednesday.
Signs of toxic charisma? Are they so charismatic that it's toxic?
We talked about riz Can you riz somebody up? Can you,
you know, be the rizzler. Here's how I know if
it's toxic. They use their charm to lower your guard.

(04:02):
They say, every knows how certain people get you nodding
before they even process what they're saying. That's no accident,
they say. Charismac individuals can deploy their charm like a
smoke screen, creating such a pleasant social experience that your brains.
Critical analysis functions take a backseat. I think I've known
plenty of women who are good at this, so she

(04:22):
at bars can be very charismaic. I'm thinking that they
they really want your attention. I think certainly dudes can
do this too. It's like a good salesman good salesperson.
They lure you with the charisma so that you don't
necessarily realize you're being sold to. They shower you with
warmth to evoke obligation. I hate that, d that genuine

(04:45):
warmth that makes you feel so comfortable around them. It's
often strategically applied. Charismac manipulators know that when they shower
you with warmth and genuine seeming interest, you'll feel natural
urge to give it back. I think that sure mean
it's all way of lowing your guard right. It's almost
like love bombing. They're kind of luring like, hey, everything's fine,

(05:06):
everything's gonna be good here, everything's lovely, and then boom,
hit you with it. They dial up their authenticity to
seem more trustworthy. They say that I'm just being real
with you. Vibe they give off might be the most
calculated move. Charismatic manipulators have massively art of appearing authentic
on demand sharing, seemingly vulnerable details are unpopular opinions that

(05:30):
make you feel like getting the unfiltered version of them. Sorry,
Hasne's allergies? My goodness, Yeah, I mean it's all kind
of ties back in right. Like Their whole idea is
that they want to seem like they are on your
side instantly, which to me is always kind of a flag.
You know what I mean. I mean, it's it's I'm
very it's kind of wrong. I was thinking about this

(05:50):
on the elevator up to work, about how hard it
is I make it hard for people to get into
the circle, you know what I mean. I don't blindly
trust anybody make it hard for people to get in
the circle. But once you leave a circle, it's impossible
to get back in. And I think that's the way
we got to go. Not everybody deserves access. Sorry, fell

(06:14):
to sneeze again. This is a professional podcast that's gonna
sneeze in the microphone. No, no, no, this is an
award winning podcast. You won't get that for me. Oh man,
we got a couple more of these. They give you
extra attention to make you feel special, They say, the
undeviiye attention that makes you fel like you're the only
person in the room. It's intoxicating for a reason. When

(06:37):
a charismatic people focus there can play attention on you,
They're activating a powerful psychological need most people have to
feel significant and valued. Now the same time, the reason
why this to me is scary is because everybody wants this, Like,
there's no reason why somebody wouldn't want this to happen.
So by saying it like, yeah, it's not necessarily that

(06:57):
everybody who does this is out to get you. Do
think like if all of these kind of come to
a hold, yeah, that might be it right there. They
intensify their presence to become the center of your world.
They say, ever know someone who seems more there than
anyone else. Charismatic people have massively art of presence, making
every interaction feel more vivid and meanful of ordinary social exchanges.

(07:19):
They modulate their voice, maintain strong eye contact, and respond
with heightened emotional resonance. Whatever you're saying, yeah, I mean,
I guess like to me, it's just like it's the
car salesman. It's a salesperson. You walk inside of a store.
They're always trying to sell you, And again I think, like,
is it hard to know what's what? Yeah? You know, again,

(07:42):
I just tend to be I have that Midwest skepticism,
and this is like, I don't know if it's a
bad thing I need to look at. But for me,
it's like, if somebody comes on too strong, my first
thought is always what do you want? Like, what do
they want for me? If somebody's likely in right off
the bat, that's always my first thought is what do

(08:04):
they want to get from me? Yeah? I don't know
that's in the past or what is. But I did
think is it's good to have that guard up obviously?
Do you deserve to have all this attention on you?
Oh yeah, girl, I've been saying that, you know. But
it's making sure that it's the right thing. Because one
of the next signs on here is they strategically I'm

(08:24):
so sorry, just sneeze again. Golly, they're strategically patient to
push you in a direction. Yeah, because in this case,
the goal is they want to get something out of you. Right,
they're pushing you to the sale. So they're persistent, but
never push. The approach they take when you're hesitant about something,
it's a calculated waiting game charismac manipulators know that most

(08:46):
people's resistance has an expiration date if they apply the
right kind of pressure, not enough to trigger defiance, but
just enough to slowly erode your boundaries. Isn't that true?
Isn't that true? Like just enough? I think real there
is good at this too, shouts to my older girl,
who I want to bull horse spot up. But like

(09:08):
I said that, I'm not necessarily in the in the
mood right now to be looking. But like every day
mine email list where I get sent houses for sale
and it's like, okay, yep, and of course I look
a browse. Not in the market right now, per se,
but I go ooh, look at these. Wouldn't that be nice?
And then I see the price. I'm like, mm no,

(09:29):
thank you. I hope you have a fantastic Wednesday. You
can follow along at intern John Radio if you get
a chance to listen to the show podcast to search
intern John in your morning show wherever you listen to
the podcasts, Stop shower