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September 25, 2024 • 18 mins
We get a hilarious email about something spicy, gross, and funny, tell you about how we got these jobs, talk about which sense we would want to lose, and poopoo on people throwing their crusts on the ground!
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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's funny because Bailey and Jenny both said, hey, don't
forget the spicy email that you're gonna read yesterday, but
we never get a chance to This is just I'm
not trying to be like deliberately gross or obscene, but
this is just something that somebody wrote in They said, hello, friends,
don't say my name. My husband's birthday was recently same
day as Bailey's, and I'd promised him a BJ. After

(00:21):
I got the kids to bed and being ready for
BJ o'clock, I asked him what he was up to.
He said, I just took a giant dump. Now. I
instantly imagined him and his dick on the toilet, so
I said, oof, let's reschedule for tomorrow. I felt I
needed to further explain my reasoning for this act as
a CIS woman with girl children, so I have no

(00:42):
dick or toilet experience. I told him the image I
have of his scenarios him sitting on the toilet with
his dick in his lap while pooping, and this is
why I don't want his dick in my mouth at
that time. Chuckling, he says, I can see how you
think that, but that's not the case, expecting me to
be reassured, he clarifies, it hangs in the bowl. Now

(01:05):
that's even worse. That's even worse. If your dick is
fucking dangling in the toilet bowl inches from poop and
poop water, then I definitely don't want that in my
mouth hole. He was understanding about why I didn't want Yeah, poopwater,
He was understanding about why I didn't want to. But
good lord, if he hadn't told me about the giant dump,

(01:25):
I would be a hawk to it on a poop dick.
I thought i'd write in to inform other CIS women
who may not know the location of the ding dong
during poop time. Anyway, it hangs in the bowl shower then,
dart Lig, Oh my god, I think you're already sending
me a staff writer sticker from my previous email, but

(01:48):
just in case, here is my address. Well, let me
take a picture of it. Thoughts on this anybody at all?

Speaker 2 (01:53):
Mean, Oh my goshly Andrew and I like are in
the bathroom together all the time, so I've like seen
the situation, and I would have told him if he
still wanted that. Bja, he needs to shower after taking
a big dump. And Andrew is normally very respectful in
that aspect, where he'll be like a I'm kind of

(02:14):
gross right now, let me go shower. So yeah, if
the husband still wanted that good old humdinger, he should
have showered.

Speaker 1 (02:24):
No, I totally agree. I think that, you know, once
in a while, Susan and I, you know, we haven't
had sex in a very long time, but it's something
like if she's like comes out of the bathroom and
the fan is running and she's flushing and she's been
there a long time, I don't want to touch her,
you know what I mean, If you just pooped, I
don't want to have sex with you. I just don't,

(02:44):
you know what I mean. There's nothing bigger of a
turn off than somebody coming out of the bathroom going
hole dud.

Speaker 2 (02:50):
There.

Speaker 1 (02:51):
It's like, Okay, oh my god.

Speaker 2 (02:53):
I'm in a conversation with Andrew recently, just because we're
going on this long trip and we have this camper van,
and I told him that I like, really am nervous
about any kind of relations happening between us because I
feel like I'm going to feel so gross all the
time because we're not going to be really showering much
like we're working on building it out, but that's not

(03:14):
happening in the next couple of weeks before we go
on this long trip. So I don't know when I'm
going to be showering, and I'm going to feel so disgusting.
And I told him that that affects me so much
when it comes to sexy time. He doesn't care, like
he I could stink so bad and he'll be like,
then I'll do it.

Speaker 3 (03:32):
And then you're in your head, You're like, I smell,
I smell, I smell.

Speaker 2 (03:34):
I don't personally like, I don't want to be in
that position.

Speaker 3 (03:37):
Yeah. So there are like gas stations that have like
showers and stuff in that you.

Speaker 2 (03:42):
Go to, like the truck stops that people shower at
and whatever. But it's not cheap. It's like seventeen dollars
for a shower at those places.

Speaker 3 (03:49):
It costs money.

Speaker 2 (03:51):
I did not know that.

Speaker 3 (03:53):
Dang, Okay, Well, just bring a lot of wet wipes.

Speaker 2 (03:55):
That's the play.

Speaker 3 (03:56):
I like a variety of wet wipes. Get like the
regular kind and then the pa kind and all of that.

Speaker 1 (04:01):
I told Susan, And I've always felt this way. I
don't mind your bo for lack of a better word,
you know, I don't I don't care if you smell sweaty.
I don't care if you've not taken a shower for
you know, like a couple of days. I don't care.
Like a natural taste or scent of someone that you're
attracted to is not gross to me. Really, yeah, really

(04:22):
not at all. I mean, you don't want somebody who
smells like they just got done cleaning out the barn.
But yeah, I don't mind. I don't mind, you know,
like a little stank.

Speaker 3 (04:31):
I had a boy One of my first boyfriends was
a lifeguard, and so he was kind of like always
sitting outside like cooking and sweating, and he just smelled
weird and it almost felt like the And he was
vegetarian too. I'm not sure if that has any contributing factor,
but it felt like his breath and even the like
the breath that would come out of his nose would

(04:53):
have a very certain smell to it that I hate it.
It was so gross and disgusting. So before I would
come over, I would be like, you have to shower
because I can't stand this weird thing you've.

Speaker 1 (05:03):
Got going I think no, I think there is something
to that. I think that like if somebody who drinks
too much, or I dated a girl that smoked a
lot of weed and the weed smell never really left her. Yeah,
and she tasted like when you would make out, she
would taste like weed.

Speaker 3 (05:21):
Like cigarette people.

Speaker 2 (05:22):
Yeah, yeah, like cigarettes.

Speaker 1 (05:23):
Yeah. Okay, next one. We got a lot to get to,
so let's see how we do. I'm so behind on
a podcast, but I drive for work monthly so I
can catch up. I know there are things from the
show I wanted to write in about, but of course
I never do a note on my phone of topics
to write in about, so I just I forget. Anyway,
I do need advice. My bestie and I are going

(05:43):
to see Usher in a few months. I'm planning on
looking for reasonably flash restaurants to eat near Target Center
and go bar grill type, nothing fancy, Alyssa, what do
you got? I don't know anything about what's near Target Center, Jenny,
what do you got?

Speaker 2 (05:58):
Well, now I'm blanking it right now. But they're known
for grape apes. Oh, the loon, that's what it's called.
The Luon is like literally right next to Target Center.
Pretty much. They've got decent like bar food. You can't
go to the if you're a drinker, you really shouldn't
go to the Loon and not order yourself a grape
ape shot. That's like what they're known for. But that
I've had their food before. I like them. If you're
not like looking for fancy a little bit higher end,

(06:23):
I guess would be Freehouse, Or you could go to Grays,
which is like a food hall and it's more of
like you know, it's like almost like a bunch of
food truck trucks put into one place, so you can
order a bunch of different stuff, go to different restaurants
within one vicinity, and that's like kind of food truck pricing.
So that's a good one. I don't know, Bailly, what
about you.

Speaker 3 (06:41):
I mean, I'm looking around it and trying to think, like,
how many of these places have I actually gone to.
I think like the Local is kind of a pub
sort of vibe, and that's cute and that says decent food.
I've never been to Hell's Kitchen, but apparently it's nice.
Oh really, Hell's Kitchen, I would say that's time really well.

(07:01):
When I'm over there, I always just go to the
place that's right next to the Orpheum, which is like
an Irish restaurant like Max Max mcdougle or something like that,
and that food is fine and I eat it and
it's good. I don't know, I don't really. I don't
eat a lot of stuff over there because you have
to pay for parking, so I always go to the

(07:21):
same places every single time.

Speaker 1 (07:24):
Okay, next one. I've been listening to you guys for
a couple of years now, and the last couple of
months I've been able to listen to your show the
whole morning, which is awesome. I love you guys. Thank you.
I recently started listening to your podcast. It's super fun.
Let me know whether you thought what you thought about
the blow job and the poop story, because you know what,
if you hear a story like that and you go, no,

(07:44):
I don't want to hear stories like that, then let
me know. But if you think stories like that are
fun once in a while, let me know. I just
thought it was fun to kind of spice it up.
It's like put a little hot sauce on the podcast.
You don't want too much, but just a little splash
of hot spots there's another analogy. My question is how
did each of you get into your job at the
radio station. It's such a cool job and not many

(08:05):
people get to do that. My story is very simple.
I went to school for it in high school. I
went to school for radio and TV broadcasting and got
a job working at a religious radio station, then a
top forty radio station, then a bigger one, than a
bigger one, and a bigger one. But I got into
it because I went to school for it, Jenny, I.

Speaker 2 (08:22):
Saw a tweet when I was in college, like katiewb
was hiring an intern. So I applied and then I
got an email from intern John that used to be
on the show, and he asked me to come in
one day. And I was confused, as if because he's like,
can you be here at five am? And I was
like sure, like for an interview. He goes like a shadow,
and so I come in. I immediately started watching another
intern do work, and that was like me being hired

(08:44):
as an intern, like I didn't actually do an interview,
and so basically just from being an intern, I've grown
from there, and like I did other things in the
in between, I went and worked into marketing at Canbury Park,
but I wanted to be in radio. So I worked
at Citi's ninety seven briefly when they had an opening,
and then an opening came on Dave show, and so
I weaseled my way back in over here.

Speaker 1 (09:03):
And Bailey is a different story, because you know it's
the Bailey's story is way different.

Speaker 3 (09:09):
Yeah. I was in a play ten years ago and
Dave was in the same play at a different company,
and I was a fan of the show. Emailed the
show said would you come see my play and I'll
come see yours? And he did. Then he started following
me on Twitter, said I was funny, had me on
a couple of times just because I was funny, curmudgeon
kind of person, and then I joined his ukulele club.
I happened to be at ukulele club the day before

(09:30):
Jenny went on dry duty. I made some jokes, tried
to be a class clown. Dave said, you want to
sub tomorrow, and then I subbed twenty two times.

Speaker 1 (09:39):
Did they ever pay you for those?

Speaker 3 (09:41):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (09:42):
I should ask you, definitely should ask.

Speaker 3 (09:44):
I mean I got like kind of paid well, but
I didn't get like back blog paid. I don't know
I have to check, but I don't know how to
find out which of my checks is the backlog check. Yes,
it's my real check.

Speaker 1 (09:57):
Look for the one with the extra six dollars on it.

Speaker 2 (10:00):
It won't be its own check. It'll probably be built.

Speaker 3 (10:02):
In add into something else.

Speaker 2 (10:03):
I'll log into my bank account.

Speaker 1 (10:06):
She goes on to say, it's Mikayla in Hudson. All
of you are so perfect for KATWB and I'm so
glad Bailey and Vaughan got added to the station. Dave
and Jenny, you both make the show what it is
and it would not be as good without either of you.
I love you all, and I hope I can meet
you one day. I would love a sticker too, So
I've got your dress, Makayla, and we'll send you a
sticker a another one. Okay, I'm trying to be a

(10:31):
little bit judicious because I don't want to run out
of time, and we really have a ton of emails today. Nice,
so let me go. Okay, here we go. This is
from Crystal. Hello, my favorite daytime companions. So glad I
found you again. As a child growing up in Minnesota,
I have always known about KATWB. It's been a Minnesota
staple forever, and for good reason. I've come to love

(10:53):
the morning show and listen to the podcast every day.
Your personalities all mixed so well. Today, Jenny, I had
secondhand in embarrassment for you. I know pumpkin isn't an
easy rhyme, but I don't think you understand the definition
of blump.

Speaker 2 (11:07):
I very much understood what it was. I feel like
people do not understand that I have a very dirty mind.
I knew what I was saying.

Speaker 3 (11:13):
I did not.

Speaker 1 (11:15):
I was screaming no to Jenny because she was singing
in rhyme pumpkin and blumpkin. I held in the laughter.
Feel free to give it a Google. If somebody could
indeed carve that into a pumpkin, they truly are an artist.
Attached are some T shirt ideas from Google to really
drive it home. A blumpkin is Jenny.

Speaker 2 (11:32):
A blowjob on the toilet while someone's taking a shit.

Speaker 1 (11:35):
Okay, yeah, why would anybody think that's a good idea?

Speaker 2 (11:38):
Yeah, I don't know. Andrew's like jokingly asked me for
them before, and I was like, you're fucking disgusting. Absolutely not.

Speaker 1 (11:44):
He's joking, yeah.

Speaker 2 (11:45):
Very much joking. He's not being serious. But no, I
know how blumpkin is. And I also said this on
the radio. Nothing rhymes with apple orchard, which was my topic,
and nothing rhymes with pumpkin as well either, So blumpkin
is what came out because it was the only word.

Speaker 1 (11:58):
I could think of. It is a funny word. I
also have to argue that not all personalized plate owners
are sex maniacts that came up on War of the Roses.
My grandparents had one as long as I could remember.
I could be wrong, but they didn't even share a bed.
They just thought they were being clever with their initials.
Act empty act empty act, get it me neither. Okay,

(12:21):
that's funny, empty act, get it mean either, Ashley. A
couple of morning shows keep Me Company, you guys, obviously
than one in Baltimore and one in Michigan. I found
it very curious that all the text lines for all
the stations were down on Monday morning. Oh maybe just
the iheartradios of the Connection. Yeah, I don't know the company.

Speaker 2 (12:40):
We all use the same texting system as not necessarily
iHeart being the Connection.

Speaker 1 (12:45):
Yeah, it was probably all one company. Please play more
bits that make Bailey lap. It's infectious and made pooh
story so much better. Maybe we can come full circle
and hear a pumpkin blumkin blunder. If you had to
lose one sense, which sense would you lose? Gard? Lick
only if you're feeling slick? P one just for fun.

(13:05):
That's from Crystal. Okay, let's do that one. Okay, they
had to lose one sense, would you choose me?

Speaker 2 (13:10):
Smell, hearing, touch, and taste? Taste? Smell for sure?

Speaker 1 (13:16):
I think you're right.

Speaker 2 (13:16):
Yeah, I would never want to lose site, touch, hearing,
those are like so important, So it would be between
taste and smell for me. And definitely, Oh maybe I
do want to lose taste because then I won't like
eat so much chocolate and junk food.

Speaker 1 (13:32):
Yeah, no, I don't. I could not smell.

Speaker 2 (13:36):
Yeah, yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (13:38):
I yeah, that's a it's an interesting question. I've never
I feel like I would really have to think about it.
But I know for a fact, like I have considered
would it be worse to be blind or deaf? And
I think I would prefer to be deaf. But that's
if those two are on the table. I've like smell,
I kind of like having smell, and if you don't
have smell, then you don't have taste. Is that correct?

Speaker 1 (13:57):
Well, let's just say that they're independent.

Speaker 3 (14:00):
If they're independent, I do smell, then I would probably
get rid of taste, Yeah, because then I could smell
all the good food, but then eat better.

Speaker 2 (14:08):
Yeah. Yeah, I would do taste also, Okay.

Speaker 1 (14:12):
Next one, Andrea says, I don't think I've written in before,
which is shocking since I am your biggest fan and
one of your longest listeners. I had to write in
because I heard y'all mention. The app dinner was Strangers.
It's called Time Left YEP. I signed up. I live
in Scottsdale, not Minneapolis. I had my first dinner. It

(14:34):
was so much fun. I was nervous about awkward conversations
or weird people, but my group was so awesome. They
match you by age and personality based on a survey.
So in our group of six people, there were two
men and the rest women. The youngest was forty no
thirty eight. The oldest was forty four. I'm forty two.
I must say I think I just lucked out since
we all jived so well. And we also went to

(14:54):
grab drinks after dinner. I was out until midnight on
a school night, so that says a lot. We have
a What's App group chat that we've been using since
our dinner a couple of weeks ago. We're setting up
more get togethers outside of the Time Left App. For example,
I'm coordinating pickleball and have others done. Others have done
Arizona Restaurant Week. I go again next Wednesday, looking forward
to meeting more fun people. So okay, they live in

(15:18):
they say, biggest fan living in Arizona, Andrea, so they
love the Time Left app and they come up on
the show.

Speaker 2 (15:24):
Yesterday because Bailey was talking about shuffle dating yes and
then I said, because Mont was saying how he doesn't
do much, and I said, you should really try out
the Time Left app or whatever it is. It pens
you with people who have similar interests after taking a survey,
and you go out to dinner with strangers. So that
was like how it got brought up. But I get
targeted ads all the time for it on Instagram. I
think I clicked on it once, so now it just

(15:45):
pops up all the time. Because I was like, oh,
what's this?

Speaker 1 (15:48):
Okay, yeah, because you do it one time. You ever
do a thing where you get a pop up ad
on Instagram and you kind of are interested, so you
kind of want to think about it, but you don't
want to buy it right now, so you tap, like
just so it will show up again. Does anybody do
that besides me?

Speaker 3 (16:03):
Yeah? I do that because I'm like, yeah, I don't
have time for this right now, so I'm gonna linger
on it so it yeah, tracks my eyeballs and then
and I hope it comes back at some point.

Speaker 1 (16:11):
All right, one more email. Hello guys, love the show
and the podcast. Thank you Elliott for listening to both
the show and the podcast. The other day, I'm eating
some pizza while driving and I got to the crust
and since it was nice out, I had my windows down.
Not feeling the crust that day, I was about to
toss the crust out of the window for some birds
or a squirrel, but I stopped mid toss. Dave Ryan

(16:33):
somehow came into my thoughts about being a pig and littering,
and I held onto the crust. It made me wonder.
I'm not a litter kind of a person at all,
but I thought that a piece of crust wouldn't be
that bad, Dave. Thanks for the influence that day and
the past, depending on where I was. I know I've
tossed an apple core or two into the woods. Does
that make me a total slab? Or is that a past?

(16:54):
Thank you Elliott. Oh, I don't know. I don't think
that you're a total slab if you have any thought
to it at all. I just I always think if
you walked into the woods and forty three people had
thrown an apple core into the woods, well that's unsightly
and gross. If you were walking out for a walk
and you're you know, there's a pizza crust laying on
the path or in the parking lot, is that gross? Well,

(17:15):
yeah it is.

Speaker 3 (17:16):
I guess what if you like, chopped up the crust
and threw it out like it is bird fish?

Speaker 1 (17:21):
Throw in your yard? Yeah, I don't know what I
would do, Yeah, thrown your yard. I don't putting trash anywhere.
I see people with banana peels, Like I'll go out
for a walk and see a banana peel on the
sidewalk in chan Hassen, and it's like, I'm sure that
the person who threw it there probably thought, well, it's
biodegradable and it's gonna whatever. No, it's a banan appeal
on a sidewalk. Same with your fucking orange peels. I

(17:43):
learned this when I was in They called it High Trails,
which was a sixth grade camp that we got to
go to when I was in guess what grade, sixth grade?
Sixth grade, Thank you Jenny, Yes, very good. And we
said can we throw our orange peels on the ground
and they said no. And that's why, because if so
many people did it, Ryan Show at KDWB dot com,

(18:04):
we gotta wrap it up.
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