INTERVIEW: Mel Robbins Talks 'Let Them Theory;' Career Journey, AI & Social Media Effects, Mental Health +More

The Breakfast Club Sits Down With Mel Robbins To Discuss 'Let Them Theory;' Career Journey, AI & Social Media Effects, Mental Health. Listen For More!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Wake that ass up in the morning. The Breakfast Club Morning.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
Everybody is thej Envy, just hilarious charlamage the guy. We
are the Breakfast Club. Law La Rosa is here as well,
and we got a special guest in the building. Ladies
and gentlemen, Meil Robbins.

Speaker 1 (00:17):
Welcome.

Speaker 3 (00:17):
Hey, it's good to see you. How you feeling warning,
I feel great.

Speaker 4 (00:20):
How are you doing Bles's Black and Holly favorite. This
is your first time in this studio. You were here
in twenty twenty one when you had.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
A high five theory.

Speaker 4 (00:27):
Yes, yes, but now millions of books later, number one
podcast in the world right now.

Speaker 3 (00:35):
Congratulation six year old woman.

Speaker 4 (00:37):
You know it really feels like you've truly arrived. What
do you what do you think?

Speaker 1 (00:42):
You know? The success? What's made all this new success happen?

Speaker 3 (00:45):
Well, you know it's not new success. Like what you're
seeing is the result of fifteen years of just boring,
grueling daily reps. Like That's what nobody wants to understand,
is that you can be successful. You can achieve anything
you want. You just have to be patient. You have
to get up out of bed every single day and

(01:06):
put one foot in front of the other. You got
to be willing to do the things you don't feel
like doing in the dark when nobody's watching, and when
you think that it's not gonna happen for you. That
is what it's about. It's about just consistent, small moves,
being patient. I mean, there were so many times where
I was just like, am I ever gonna get out
of it? Is anyone ever gonna notice? Like? Am I

(01:26):
ever gonna get invited to the breakfast club? Like one
of the like when is somebody gone to notice your
spot that you wanted? Well? No, but seriously, like you
kind of sit there because I mean every one of
us have had those moments, whether you're putting out music
or you're starting a YouTube channel or you started a business,
and it's so easy to look around at what everybody
else is doing and think that you're losing some race

(01:47):
in life. The real game is with yourself. Can you
keep going? Can you say to yourself? And this is
kind of how I would keep myself going in those moments.
I would say, I refuse to believe that this is
how the story ends. I believe that at some point
all of this work is going to pay off. I
don't have to know how I have to believe that

(02:09):
it will. And if it hasn't yet, it's not meant
to yet. There's some lesson. There's something I'm being held
for that I don't know what it is. But if
I choose to believe in this moment that things are
going to get better, that things are going to turn
out for me, that all this hard work is going
to pay off, that trying to be a better person
is going to pay off, at some point I will
look back on my life and say, oh, that's why

(02:31):
it didn't happen. Then, Oh, that's why it took longer.
Oh that's why either you weren't ready or God the
universe was holding you for a different moment. And so,
you know, a lot of people ask me, what is
this moment about. I think it's about fifteen years of
ridiculously hard work becoming a better person. I think it's

(02:52):
about fifteen years of just chipping away at getting out
of debt and doing better in my marriage and in
a better mother, and get in control of my emotions
and my mental health, chipping away at building a business.
And I truly believe that I was being held for
this moment like this one thousand percent is my legacy.

Speaker 1 (03:13):
Well, let me ask you a question.

Speaker 2 (03:14):
Mal you talk about the reps YEP for you.

Speaker 1 (03:17):
It worked out and successful and great.

Speaker 2 (03:20):
What about that person that is just not good?

Speaker 1 (03:23):
Right?

Speaker 2 (03:23):
That rap of that is not good? Like trying that
podcast person that is doing the podcast that is just
not good and everybody takes good good to anybody?

Speaker 3 (03:34):
Well, I don't, I see, I don't believe that.

Speaker 2 (03:35):
And but when do you stop because you're a sixty
year old rapper like you know I mean?

Speaker 3 (03:39):
Or maybe why can there be a ninety one ninety
year old one? See? Maybe what the rapping is for
is maybe it's not about rapping. Maybe there is something
that you're doing when you are rapping and nobody's coming
that is teaching you a lesson about patience. Maybe what
it's doing is teaching you to believe in your when

(04:00):
nobody else does. And every time that you show up
and nobody's there, every time you post a video on
your YouTube channel that only your uncle and your son
are subscribed to, every time you post, you're basically saying,
you know what, screw the world, I believe in myself.
I'm doing this for myself. And maybe you're not gonna
be a rap.

Speaker 2 (04:21):
And I think that's the key that you said. I
think you know with the podcast explosion, everybody did a podcast.
Everybody's mama did a podcast, everybody's grandma did a podcast.
But I think the reason that people have done it,
and I think people can see through it, is a
lot of people did it for financial Yes, they seen
the money that people were making and said I want
to jump on that train, or they seen the money
that rappers were making and I wanted to jump through

(04:42):
that train. So it doesn't matter if you're doing it
not for the right reason. I don't think it might
not never connect because your intentions aren't there.

Speaker 3 (04:50):
But hold on a second. See, I actually believe everybody
has woven into your DNA, this intelligent design and this
kind of energy. Yes that is either pulling you toward
things or repelling you from other things. That we are natural, energetic,
magnetic beings. And this isn't just some woo woo garbage

(05:11):
like there is hard science, not my science, but neuroscientists
that will tell you that everything is physics and energy.
Like the words if you're hearing us speaking right now,
what you are you're watching us the words coming out
of my mouth are being translated through energy into your ears.
And so you are a being that is wired to

(05:31):
align with things that are meant for you and to
reject things that aren't. I mean, you know, like if
you walk in a room and you immediately connect with
somebody that's alignment. If you walk into a room, you're like, oh,
let's give that person some space because you can read
the energy that's alignment. And so for me, when you
give the example of like the person who's a rappers,
just terrible. Just there's lots of people out there doing

(05:52):
stuff they're just terrible. What I love is that they
felt called to do something. I don't care if they
felt called to do it because they want to make
more money. I mean, hell, I was working five six
jobs back, you know, fifteen years ago when we were
eight hundred thousand dollars in debt because I needed groceries
on the table, I needed gas in the tank. And
so motivation to be safe and to make money or

(06:14):
because of your ambition, that's a beautiful thing. But at
some point you're gonna go, I'm not that good at this,
but I believe, and this is what I think is
super cool. About life. Absolutely, every experience that you have
in life is leading you somewhere and teaching you something.
And I'm gonna one of the reasons why I share
so much about what I've learned and the mistakes that

(06:35):
I've made. I'm like the villain in every book, is
because I'm stubborn, Like it takes a sledgehammer from the
universe for me to wake the hell up and stop
doing something like I literally get so into my groove,
whether it's drinking too much or taking my stress out
on my kids or being a jealous, insecure friend that
things have to backfire for me to wake up and go, well, yes,

(06:57):
I better try something different.

Speaker 4 (06:59):
So when you were in bed stuck at that lowest moment,
when you was in debt, what was that pivotal realization?
What was that sledge handle? Because I remember you saying
that you had the realization that nobody was coming to
save What did it feel like to face that truth.

Speaker 3 (07:12):
It's very similar to that moment that you told me
about with the steel toilet. See, you're one decision away
from a different life, and you can make that decision
any moment, any day, like you could make a decision
today that changes the trajectory of your life, because a
decision turns you in a different direction. Anybody that has

(07:33):
gotten sober, anybody that's quit a job, anybody that's left
a relationship or moved. You know what I'm talking about,
That there is a decision and typically I don't know
how it works for you, But for me, I have
to get so sick of where I am that I'm like,
I'm done, like enough of this smell. And for me,
that moment, you know, was two thousand and eight. We

(07:56):
were eight hundred thousand dollars in debt, I was unemployed,
my husband's right strump business was going under. Three kids
under the age of ten, and I was drinking myself
into the ground. I couldn't get out of bed. And
I think that what's interesting about life is even in
moments where you're struggling, you kind of know the things
you could do right. You kind of know when you're
not like doing things to help yourself, you kind of know,

(08:18):
Like I knew you should get out of bed, I
knew I should stop drinking. I knew I should look
for a job. Wasn't doing any of it because I
didn't feel like it. I had lost hope. I was
kind of in this mode. And this is what I
also believe you and I talked about this when you
know you were on my podcast that I think the
single biggest thing in people's way, it's not a lack
of skills, it's discouragement. If you don't believe that the

(08:42):
simple things are going to work for you, you're not
going to do it. And that's where I was. I
was like, why even bother getting out of bed? I'm
about to lose this house and my marriage and my sanity,
everything I care about. Why why bother? And you know
my moment the decision was. I saw this rocket ship
one night when I was drunk on bourbon, and it
gave me this idea that maybe maybe I should launch

(09:04):
myself out of bed. Maybe if I moved fast enough
in the morning, I wouldn't be in the bed when
the depression and the anxiety hit. And so the next
morning it was a it was a Tuesday morning in
February two thousand and eight. The alarm went off and
I remembered that stupid rocket launch idea, and for whatever reason,
I just started counting backwards like Nasada's five four, three

(09:26):
two one, and then I got out of bed, and
that was the beginning of a completely new life because
it was like that first domino that tips, and it
gave me this thought, oh wait a minute, I can
actually make myself do things that I don't feel like doing. Huh.
And you know, the truth is when people ask me, okay,

(09:48):
you're having a moment, that was what it were. The
math is like what fifteen years ago, sixteen years ago.
It took me sixteen years from that moment to get
to where you are now. It took me sixteen years
of pushing my ass out of bed every day. It
took me sixteen years of taking a breath and not
screaming at my kids. It took me sixteen years of

(10:09):
showing up and doing things when nobody was paying attention
and learning, you know, from every little thing, and sixteen
years of saying, one of these days, all this hard
work is going to pay off. One of these days,
I'm going to figure out what I'm supposed to be doing.
One of these days I'm going to like help people
that are struggling and that felt as bad as I did,
know that they're not alone. One of these days I'm

(10:29):
going to actually like myself instead of constantly hating myself
and trashing myself for all the things I think I
did wrong.

Speaker 4 (10:36):
You know, in Charch we call that a testimony, So
it's like God put you through all of those trials
and you would have a testimony for this moment.

Speaker 3 (10:44):
Yes, and the true skill other than like, I think
there's two incredible skills that I developed during this period
of my life. The first one is teaching myself that
if you just do the things you don't want to do,
you will have everything you ever wanted. I'm gonna say
that again, if you just do the things you do
not want to do, you will have everything you have

(11:04):
ever wanted.

Speaker 1 (11:05):
Expound on that well, I mean.

Speaker 3 (11:07):
Think about it, like, if you want to make a
million dollars, here's my recommendation. Go to chat GTP and
type in how do I make a million dollars in
the next two years? Give me a day by day
plan that I can execute in fifteen minutes, and it
will probably teach you step by step how to launch
a business online and get into affiliate marketing. And if
you actually do those things, you will have a million

(11:28):
dollars in the bank. There are formulas for everything you
want in life, to lose weight, to find love, to
heal your formulas everywhere far love. Oh, of course, Lauren,
you try that one.

Speaker 1 (11:39):
That ain't gonna work for you, Lauren, I'm good, Yes
it is.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
Do not put discourage.

Speaker 5 (11:44):
I don't even engage in conversation with neg I just
let them.

Speaker 3 (11:47):
Yeah, you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (11:48):
I want to go back to something that you just said,
because it's true.

Speaker 4 (11:50):
Right, somebody out there listening to you and they was like,
that ain't gonna work, And that's exactly why you're not gonna.

Speaker 3 (11:56):
Get it correct. Of course, that's exactly why you're correct.
And so here's the other thing I want to tell you.
That really is a skill that really helped me. So
if you look backwards at your life, you can see
every twist and turn and every experience, even the ones
you didn't deserve, even the ones that were not your fault.

(12:17):
You can look in the rear view mirror and actually
see how it all led you here, and that there
were lessons or things that led you here. The skill
that I want you to understand that you also have
is that you could actually stand in this moment, no
matter how horrible it is, and you can say I
choose to believe that in the future, I am going

(12:41):
to get a point where there is a bigger possibility
for myself in my life that I can't even imagine
for myself right now. But I choose to believe that
I will get to that point fifteen years from now,
ten years from now, and I will look back on
this low moment where I didn't believe and I will
go that's why, that's why that happened.

Speaker 5 (13:02):
Do you believe that? So you believe that every single
person has that in them or not has it in them?
Because I believe that. But do you believe that every
single person at some point in their life will unlock that?

Speaker 3 (13:10):
No?

Speaker 5 (13:11):
Okay, because for me when I am reading through this,
a lot of what you're saying is common sense stuff.
But I think even when you think about if you
have a friend group and there's two people who are
really successful and two people that aren't, the difference is
just what they choose to actually do this book, If
I'm a person at choosing not to do that, how
does your book stop that? Like that's a habit, that's a.

Speaker 3 (13:30):
Yeah, it's a great question. So there's two things about that.
So if you're in a friend group and you got
two people who are successful and two people aren't. One
thing I do want to validate because I do think
in like kind of in culture, there's this myth that
everybody's got the same resources. Not everybody has the same resources.
So you might be in a friend group, or there's
two people that ended up not having college debt, so

(13:51):
they started at a different starting line, and so there
might be things that are actually real things that contributed
to somebody's success. Added to though, is a huge piece
of it, because I do believe, especially in today's world
with technology and with the amount of information out there,
that if you commit yourself to learning new skills and
to just chipping away at it and continuing to show up.

(14:14):
There are so many people on this planet, there is
enough success for you, and you can figure it out
over time if you keep chipping away at it. And
so you know, the question is what's in it? In
this book? The let them theory is going to help
you because if you're tired, if you're overwhelmed, if you're
feeling like you keep trying and nothing is clicking, the

(14:35):
problem isn't you. The problem is you unknowingly give all
of your power to other people. You give power to
what people say, how they feel, their expectations, what they're doing.
And when you care more about what other people think
and when you are navigating life based on what other
people's expectations are, down from you look first line. There

(14:55):
you go.

Speaker 5 (14:55):
Yes, that's the biggest thing that for me with this book,
I was like saying that when it's in a book,
I listen.

Speaker 1 (15:02):
Let them think bad thoughts. Oh, I want to just
set it up about the book.

Speaker 3 (15:06):
Man.

Speaker 4 (15:06):
There's some books that I believe are must reads in life.
To let them Theory by Mel Robbins has been added
to that must readless. My wife got it for me
a few weeks ago, and the book is just essentially
about how you have to stop wasting your life on
things that you can't control.

Speaker 1 (15:20):
When did you get to that rebels?

Speaker 3 (15:21):
Oh my god, fifty four. I am a learner, you know.
And and the funny thing is is I'm married to
the chillest dude on the plan. I mean, I'm married
to a man who is not only Buddhist, he is
a death duela. And like when you want to talk
about like a person, yeah that can just sit in
stillness I'm like a tornado of emotion, and so I've

(15:43):
always wanted to let things go. I've always wanted to
not care what people think. I've never known how. And see,
when you're stressed, or you're easily offended like I used
to be, or you have a lot going on, it
is very hard to not get wrapped up and what
other people are thinking and doing. It's very hard to
not let what your kids are going through stress you out.

(16:05):
And so you know, I've been trying to do this forever.
I mean, this is not a new idea. The serenity
prayer is the let Them theory. In fact, you know,
I sat down with doctor Martin Luther King the third
and his wife and Andrea, and they both said, we
write about it in the let Them Theory. They both
reflect on the fact that this concept that you have
to give up control in order to gain control, that

(16:28):
your power is in your response. That this is part
of doctor Martin Luther King Junior's legacy because your response
is what dictates who you are. It's not what's happening
out there, it's how you respond to it with your
thoughts and your actions and how you process your own
emotions and so I did not know this until I

(16:49):
was fifty four years old. And you know, for me
personally the power of these two words, because let them
We've all said let them in our lives a bazillion times.
I mean, there's a sermonslating it's twenty years old, Dad
Jakes doing this let them sermon. So this is a
concept that has been around since the beginning of time,
and that's why this is resonated. I'm not teaching you

(17:11):
something new. I'm reminding you of what you already know
to be true, and I'm handing you this tool so
you can snap out of this crap where we're constantly
worked up about what other people are doing to take
their power back.

Speaker 5 (17:22):
You talk about managing other people a lot, and I've
never heard the term put like that, but you use
it to basically talk about how we're so what you're
talking about r now, we're worried about other people, but
also too, I think it's expectations of other people that
we're trying to we're making decisions based around that a lot.
When did you realize this whole scale of like managing
other people and learning when the clock out of that

(17:44):
job of trying to do that.

Speaker 3 (17:45):
Well, So what it's going to happen is this. So
when you start using the let them theory, and it's
so easy to use the next time you're stressed out
or annoyed or frustrated, and it's always with other people,
just say let them. That's how you use it. Let them,
and you're going to immediately feel peaceful. Your mom's in
a bad mood, Let her be in a bad mood.
Some old friend of yours is talking, let them talk trash.
Why you're not allowing it? When you say let them,

(18:10):
you are reminding yourself there's one thing in life I
can't control. It's what other people say, do, believe, feel,
and it's my job to So when you start saying
let them, and you detach yourself from the responsibility of
having to manage somebody else, something interesting happens. You realize,
oh my god, I've lived my life in reserve reverse.

(18:31):
I actually live my life giving time and energy trying
to manage what other people think. I have kept myself
in a major or in a relationship, or in a
situation because I'm afraid to disappoint my parents or my friends.
I mean, how many people keep drinking or keep going
out at night when what they really want to do

(18:52):
is launch a business. And so they don't like take
the weekends to work on the things that they want
to work on because they feel like they don't want
to disappoint their friends or people going to talk about them.
That's you giving power to other people. Like another way
that we give power to other people is we, you know,
get so focused on the headlines that we gas light
ourselves into believing that you have no power. It's complete garbage.

(19:14):
Of course you have power.

Speaker 1 (19:15):
I wish you would he a couple of weeks ago.
We'll continue on.

Speaker 3 (19:17):
And so when you start saying let them, it's sort
of this revelation where you're like, oh my god, I
spend so much time and energy worrying about other people.
I spent so much time and energy letting them stress
me out.

Speaker 5 (19:31):
But is there a level of like when that becomes
easier versus harder? Because when you were just talking, I
thought about Michelle Obama. Yes, in the podcast one of
the podcasts she did this week, she was talking about
how she realized she was doing a lot for other
people not thinking about herself, and she started making decisions
for herself. So she's going place, so she wants to go, and.

Speaker 3 (19:48):
They think she's divorce because of it.

Speaker 5 (19:51):
But it's like, she's Michelle Obama, so it's hard for
her to like the noise is so it's a lot
louder for her well.

Speaker 3 (19:58):
Of course. But whether or not you pay attention to
that is within your control. Whether or not you look
at your phone, and we're all guilty of it, whether
you are Michelle Obama or you're just going into your
middle school, whether or not you give attention to the gossip,
you look for, the gossip, you mainline it, that is

(20:19):
within your control. If you say, I can never, ever, ever,
ever stop somebody from lying about me, from making up
stuff about me, from saying whatever they're going to say,
So why on earth when I spend any time and
energy managing it? And then you go let me This
is the second part of the theory. Once you say
let them, let them think negative thoughts, let them make

(20:41):
up all kinds of crap, Because if you know you're
not getting divorced, what do you care about these idiots
saying let me remind myself that I know the truth.
And when you know the truth about who you are,
you don't think about other people. When you live your
life in a way that makes you proud, you don't
think of other people.

Speaker 1 (21:01):
I tell them all.

Speaker 5 (21:02):
You told me to read her book, and I was,
and I already had the book because I think Eddie
had given it to us a minute and I was like, oh,
I got the book.

Speaker 3 (21:08):
And for you got it. It will change your Damn.
I'm telling you it will change your life because but.

Speaker 1 (21:13):
You have to get to that stage.

Speaker 2 (21:14):
Yes, because it's it's took me a while to get
to that stage.

Speaker 3 (21:17):
It while you think he was born that way, and
I don't.

Speaker 1 (21:24):
I've never truly cared, right.

Speaker 4 (21:26):
But then even when I started to care, I realized
things like the serenity prayer, a little simple things that
you saw sitting in your grandmother's house. You realize that
is absolutely the truth of God, Grammy, the serenity. Excepting
things I cannot change, courage change the things I can,
and with't no difference. And the easiest way to let
go of what you can't control is just realizing you
never had control to begin with.

Speaker 3 (21:43):
And here's another thing that's really important, That's why you're
gonna love it, is that what ol stirt to happen
when you say let them, is it's not that you're
allowing people to do bad things, they're already doing bad things.
You're recognizing that it's not your job to manage other people,
because this is a book that's about power and control
and peace. Then you say, let me remind myself how

(22:05):
I respond to things. Actually is where my power is.
So do I give this any time and energy or not?
Do I double down on just living my life in
a way that makes me proud of myself, which is
where your power is. And the thing that also changed
me dramatically is I couldn't believe how much stress I

(22:27):
felt and how I was bracing all the time. And
when you start to say let them, and you release
that kind of obligation to make other people happy or
to make everybody know that you're not divorced, or that
everything's okay, or like, just let them think whatever they
want to think, and live your life in a way

(22:47):
that makes you proud. You're going to get all this
time and energy back. And what I love about this
is when you're less stressed and when you're not bracing
all the time because you know your boss is narcissistic,
so why on earth would you walk into work assuming
that today's going to be anything other than what it
already has always been. Let them be who they are.

Speaker 4 (23:08):
I love the Managing Stress chapter, and in that chapter
you say you can't control how other adults behave and
stressing about it diminisces your power. You'll never reach the
full potential of your life if you continue to allow
stupid things to rule, people to drain your life for
can you yes?

Speaker 3 (23:22):
Yes, So the two most important resources that you have
in life time energy, that's what you got. How you
spend your time, where you put your energy, it actually
determines your experience of life. And that's why I say,
if you have this experience right now where you're exhausted
and overwhelmed and nervous and you're not like feeling like

(23:43):
you can ever have time for yourself or your goals,
just start clicking. You're not the problem. The problem is
all this time and energy you spend dealing with other people,
and so let them is a boundary that you draw
where you start to recognize, Okay, I'm going to let
other people think and feel and do and have their opinions,
and I'm going to let them be disappointed. I'm going
to let them misunderstand me, and I'm going to let

(24:06):
me really take that time and energy back and pour
it into working on myself and staying in my piece.
And what I've found is that when I'm less stressed,
which i am because I'm not allowing stupid stuff for
other people to stress me out, I'm actually a better person.

(24:27):
I make more money because I can use my brain
instead of being in fight or flight. I don't like
vomit on my kids. My emotions. Like I used to
be the kind of person that would come in at
you know, after work and be yelling at everybody or
mad at the dog for crying out loud, and then
I'd be like, I'm sorry, it's a bad day at work,
stressful day at work with the dogs, you know, they
kind of do this and then they come back and

(24:48):
they're really nice because they they literally dogs don't don't
like punish you for that. And it's so sad that
I used to leave the worst of me for people
I cared about the most and then blame it on
the stress of the day. That By the way, when
you use the let them theory, you have control over

(25:08):
whether or not this stuff gets to you. You know,
It's funny. I walked into a hotel t heere and
everybody that was at the check in descer like, let them.
We love this. I'm like, Well, if you work retail,
which I have in my life, if you work in
a restaurant or hospitality having to deal with people, you
gotta let them. You gotta let them, Like, do not
let somebody's rudeness actually get to your spirit? Protect it

(25:33):
because your time and energy matters, and it's important. And
this is these are two boundaries. Let them be, because
the more I let other people be who they are,
the better my life gets. The more I let other
people live their lives, better my life gets because I
am protecting myself from unnecessary stress and drama, and I'm
reminding myself powers always in here. And that's you know.

(25:55):
You asked me earlier, do I really believe that actually
everybody has in them a unique path and gift? And
I said yes. And I think the reason we don't
unlock it is because we have given all of our
power to something outside of ourselves, and so we have
forgotten who we are. We have forgotten what it feels
like to be peaceful. We have forgotten how much of

(26:18):
a difference we can make in our families and our
communities because we've just run ourselves ragged, allowing the problems
of the world to bring us down. And that's not
to say there aren't problems. What I'm here to say
is we need you to be in your power and
in your peace so that we can better respond to
the problems in the world.

Speaker 4 (26:39):
Isn't that society's fault because society makes us focus on
the external so much and not enough on the internal.

Speaker 3 (26:46):
Well, I if you blame society, you give society the power.
I think that there are ways that we've been manipulated
through social media. I think there are ways that we
have gotten lazy. I think it's very problematic that we've
got and away from the underpinnings that have really kept
people tied to community, whether it's church or its synagogue,

(27:07):
or it's a mosque, or it is volunteering in your community,
whether it is schools having more funding, whether it is
you know, people prioritizing a day of rest over running
your kids all over for sports. Like, we have forgotten
the things that actually matter in life, and we're now

(27:29):
spending six hours a day on the phone. And so
if you blame the phone, which yes, it's designed to
be addictive because the more time anybody spends on it,
the more money people make because you're seeing ads. That's
why it's addictive. It's just like a slot machine. And
so that's not your fault. But when you wake up
and recognize, wait a minute, do I actually want to
give that much power to that thing? Isn't the phone

(27:51):
supposed to be a tool that I can use for
self expression, communication and to make money? Why am I
the tool here? When you see that, then you take
your power back it. So it's sort of like this
thing like you can't actually get sober until you stop drinking.
You can't take control of your life until you stop
giving all the control to everything else.

Speaker 4 (28:11):
Let me do it.

Speaker 1 (28:12):
I have a question.

Speaker 2 (28:12):
Yeah, in chapter five, you say let them think bad
thoughts about you, right. The question with that is is
when a lot of people, sometimes especially on social media, right,
nobody facts checks anymore, So sometimes you might not care.
You can let them think what they want to think,

(28:32):
but that could affect your overall business.

Speaker 3 (28:35):
Right.

Speaker 2 (28:35):
And we see that a lot, right, because people don't
clear and people don't do homework. Right, So if Lauren
says something about somebody, people might automatically think it's facts.

Speaker 1 (28:44):
It's the truth. People don't do that homework. But that
could affect your reputation. That can affect your business.

Speaker 2 (28:49):
That could affect the way that your kids, teachers look
at you, or business that comes around. So what do
you do in that example, because you still want to
fix your reputation, right, it might not be that you care,
but you want your legacy to go how things are factual,
and that happens a lot, especially somebody and I'm sure
that's happened to you in course.

Speaker 1 (29:08):
What are you doing well?

Speaker 3 (29:09):
So here this is a very tricky question because you're
talking about the pr and the media swirl that has
a life of its own, which, by the way, you're
never going to be able to control. And it's actually
getting worse with AI because AI, you like, you guys,
watch this Google Like if you ever go and Google

(29:30):
yourself every couple days, the way AI talks about you
changes every day. And because we all are broadcasters and
we talk about all different types of topics. Like two
days ago, AI was reporting that I was divorced because
I was talking to somebody who was divorced on the podcast,
like it's not like I don't care, like I'm not divorced,
but you know what I mean, and so so it's

(29:53):
just kind of a joke on some regard and so
kind of understanding the ecosystem that you're in, because if
you've got a business risk issue, then you need to
make a very clear statement about what's truth and what's
not and then do not feed the fire, because the
more that you feed the fire, the more legitimacy you

(30:13):
give to this thing. And there are two kinds of
people in the world. There are people who are intent
on seeking the truth, and there are people who are
intent on misunderstanding and spreading gossip. There are people who
think about ideas and there are people who think about people.
There are people who are able to be intelligent and

(30:36):
rational and really look at a situation, and then there
are people who are intent on feeling powerful by stepping
on other people's heads. And that is just the world
we live in unfortunately. So pr is a little bit
different in personal, Like, I think it's really important to
understand who you are, whether you're dealing with rumors at
a middle school or you're dealing with rumors in your community,

(30:58):
or you've got somebody in your family trash talking you.
In order to repair your reputation, it is better to
show than to tell. In my opinion, you prove the
truth based on how you show up in life, not
based on the words that come out of your mouth.
And if there is somebody spreading things about you, the

(31:19):
best way to handle it is to go directly to
that person and to ask them about it. You know,
I understand that you've been saying such and such about me,
which is not true. Can you help me understand why
you would be talking about me like this? Because people
who gossip don't ever think that anybody's ever going to
say anything because they're gossiping because they want to feel

(31:41):
more powerful than you when you have the ability to
let them say negative things. Okay, I just found out
about it. Let me choose is this something I want
to actually address or is this just data where I go? Okay,
now I know who this person is noted. Now I
adjust my time and energy and whether or not I
hang out with you. Because those kind of people, the
people that gossip about you, ultimately end up crumbling anyway,

(32:05):
because it always catches up.

Speaker 1 (32:06):
With them, and I love that chapter.

Speaker 4 (32:08):
You know, to let them think bad thoughts about you,
and you say, stop allowing other people's opinions to hold
you back from pursuing what you want and limiting the
potential of your one, wide and precious life. It goes
back to what you said, discourage me, because when you
hear that things, you get discouraged and then you get
down and you stop. But I truly believe nothing can
stop the destiny God has planned for you unless you stop.

Speaker 3 (32:32):
Yeah, You're the only one that can stop yourself. I
believe that.

Speaker 5 (32:35):
Now.

Speaker 3 (32:35):
That does not mean there aren't very real obstacles. That
does not mean that you're not in debt. It does
not mean that you you know, if you have a
criminal record. You have a criminal record, and there are
going to be things that are in your way and
people that will discriminate against you based on that. As
a former public defender, I freaking hate that that is true,
because I do believe that we need to have the
kind of society that allows people to change. I agree

(32:57):
we have to, yes, and so there are very real
things in your way. That said, I believe in your
capacity to figure it out. I believe in your capacity
to tap into something that is bigger in terms of
your potential. And I think people believe that too in themselves.
Like you know, it's it's the reason why when you

(33:18):
hear an incredible sermon or you see a movie and
you get all choked up, it's not because of what
you're watching on the TV. It's because it's resonating with
something that is deeply true in here. And I think
that's why this let them theory has exploded. It's because
I'm reminding you of what you know to be true
about life and about yourself.

Speaker 4 (33:39):
And if you feel it whenever you talk, whenever you talk, period,
but especially when you talk about to let them theory,
it is something internally that wakes up in me. It's
like just a fire, like, oh, it's just a reminder
of like you said, what you already know.

Speaker 3 (33:53):
Yeah, it's a It's an incredible thing. And what I
also love about it is, you know, it's kind of
flying around social because when you say let them, you
feel superior to other people. I'll let them go away
without me, let them walk out the door, let them
cheat on me. But the let me part reminds you
that the only change in a relationship. It never comes

(34:14):
from other people. It always comes from you and you
changing how you show up. And so the irony of this,
it probably should be called the let me theory, because
it actually brings you closer to the people you care
about because instead of trying to change people, instead of
constantly being annoyed at your mom's mood or you know,
or thinking you know better than what your kids are
doing now and they're oh, people feel that judgment, and

(34:37):
so there is distance right now in your relationships, particularly
with your family, because we're judging with our family. But
when you start to let them, you create this space
that is so awesome where you see your parents, or
you see your kids, or you see your brother and
sister as they are. And then it's on you to

(35:00):
how do I love this person as they are instead
of constantly wishing they'd be different.

Speaker 5 (35:05):
That's how I was going to ask you, how do
you figure that out? Because sometimes that creates the distance too.
When you can't figure that out, you're like, I'd rather
just not because you don't want to interact and something
goes wrong or you say something wrong or you offend somebody.

Speaker 3 (35:16):
Yeah, so it's a great question, and you have to
do it literally day by day. Like you get to
choose if somebody's in a bad mood and they're the
kind of person that gets very emotionally immature and they
pout and then you know, they kind of go silent
on you. You get to choose. Okay, I'm gonna let
them be annoyed about this thing. I'm gonna let them

(35:36):
be disappointed. Then I'm not gonna make it to the
family such and such thing. Okay. Well. One of the
cool things about really giving somebody the space to feel
what they feel is it made me realize disappointment's actually
a really good thing because if somebody's disappointed that you're
not coming home for the holidays, it just means they
love you. It doesn't mean you have to go. It

(35:59):
just means means that they just really wish you were there.
Same thing with business. If you have a business partner
and you can't make it to something, if they're disappointed,
that's a good thing. Like what do you want your
business parder to be like, Oh, you can't make it,
Thank God, I can't stand that guy.

Speaker 4 (36:15):
No.

Speaker 3 (36:16):
Disappointment's great, but it doesn't mean you have to take
that feeling away. By changing what you're doing, and in
that space you get to say, what do I value?
What do I need to do for me? What kind
of person am I? Am I showing up because I
feel guilty? Or am I showing up because based on
my values, family is important? So I am actually going

(36:36):
to bend over backwards ago not for them, I'm going
because it says something about me and what's important to me.
So I think we've also gotten to this point where
relationships are so transactional. We text somebody, we expect a
text back. You know, we do this, we expect you
to do something back, and so we're constantly waiting for
the return. What if the secret to relationships was actually

(36:58):
being way more flexible and just going what kind of
person am I? Am I the person that makes the plans?
Am I the person that reaches out? Not because I
expect someone else to, but just because that's the kind
of person that I am. And it's really shifted for
me with friendship, this sense of okay, am I in?
Am I out?

Speaker 1 (37:15):
You know?

Speaker 3 (37:15):
Are they a friend? Are they not? And you start
to realize there's so many more people in your life
than you realize that care about you. There's so many
people that are rooting for you when you start to
let other people live their lives and make their plans.
But if you're the kind of person that wants to
stay to connect it to people, you just reach out
just without expectation or return, you will be shocked at

(37:36):
how much more comes back to you when you're not
gripping it so much and you're just doing it because
it makes you feel good to check in on people.

Speaker 1 (37:43):
That's right.

Speaker 4 (37:43):
I want to go back to something else, because you
know you were a public defender. I know you did
a little bit of radio, but I know some people
who hear this conversation because you mentioned being in debt
a lot.

Speaker 1 (37:52):
Eight hundred thousand dollars in debt.

Speaker 3 (37:54):
That's a lot.

Speaker 1 (37:54):
Some people have never seen eight hundred thousand dollars. So
you had to have some times.

Speaker 3 (37:57):
I didn't have eight hundred thousand dollars. I had a house, okay,
and we took out a home equity line. We then
and cash that sucker out. We took out a bazillion
credit cards. We had a little bit of savings and
we cashed that out. We cashed out a little bit
of the kid's college fund, and we took a loan

(38:17):
on a car, so there was like that. And then
what happened is they started factoring, which is a I
mean predatory lending, which basically means every time they swipe
a credit card at a restaurant, they're charging interest toward it,
which was part of our guarantee. And then so it
was that's not like we had that as a nest egg.

Speaker 1 (38:37):
But you had to have some type of success though.
Oh before yeah, well, well.

Speaker 3 (38:41):
I mean yeah, I mean I was a public defender
and then I worked for a large law firm, and
then in nineteen ninety nine I kind of got into
that first dot com thing in Boston, and so yeah,
you know, we were in that stage of life, three
kids under the age of ten. I'm working, my husband's working,
We're making the ends meet.

Speaker 1 (38:58):
Yeah, but you just felt like this isn't what I'm
supposed to be doing.

Speaker 3 (39:02):
Well, yes, what happened is in two thousand and eight,
I had tried to do something in the media business.
And it's a long complicated story, but I basically got
cast to be on a reality show that I was
going to host, where it was going to be like
an extreme business makeover show, and remember that move the
bus show, so they wanted to do that for businesses.

(39:25):
And by the time we went to shoot the show,
they had changed the show entirely and it was now
called Someone's Got to Go. And I was the host
of a show. Get this where people were going to
get fired on national television, on a reality show from
real jobs, and I wasn't firing them. You were voting
a colleague out. It was Survivor in an office place.

(39:46):
So we shot two episodes. It was a disgusting show.
I was literally popping xanax because I was having panic
attacks the entire time. So I'm like, this is not
what I signed up for. The show gets tabled and
I got held in one of those non compete content things,
and I didn't have a job. And this was right
at the moment where my husband's first restaurant had done well.

(40:07):
Why well, I mean they were doing okay, you know,
they were successful, they could pay their bills, friends and
family had invested, and then they were They raised a
little bit more money from friends and family to open
two more locations, and the whole thing imploded. So now
I'm unemployed. Friends and family have invested, they're working their
tails off to keep this thing afloat. We both feel
like we have royally screwed up our lives. I feel

(40:31):
like I've been a public defender. I've worked in a
law firm, I've worked at three different startups. I've tried
life in business coaching. Then I did this show which
I thought was going to be our meal ticket, and
now all of a sudden, I'm in a non compete.
I can't get a job. And some people would say, well,
just go back to the law. I'm like, do you
know when you are in that position where you think
you royally screwed up you have you do not have

(40:52):
any confidence? How do you go get a job when
you're like, I don't have any worth? And I got
to pretend that everything's okay because friends and family have
invested in this business and the doors are still open
and they're trying to save it. That was the backdrop
at the age of forty one, and you know, I think, yeah,
I'm a big visualizer, and you know I love vision
boards and that kind of stuff, but never in a

(41:13):
million years was the vision for my life. Okay, at
age forty let's make a vision board. I'm going to
paste an image of getting divorced and being bankrupt and alcoholism.
No people, but I'm like the Maserati and the Beachhof.
So when when your life takes a turn, you're like,
I didn't plan for this. It's surprising how you can
know what you should be doing, but all motivation to

(41:36):
do it's gone. And that's when I created that five
second rule of the countdown five four three two one
to just get myself out of bed.

Speaker 4 (41:43):
You know you were in the book you talk about
how you felt paralyzed by imposter syndrome, especially when you
were teaching.

Speaker 1 (41:48):
Yeah, the five second rule.

Speaker 4 (41:50):
I wonder what's changed since then, Like, we'll gives you
the confidence and authority now to feel like you can
go out here and teach, to let.

Speaker 3 (41:55):
Them do that's a great, great question. So you know
how well, First of all, impostor syndrome is deeply misunderstood.
So imposter syndrome does not mean that you don't belong
in the room you're in. Imposter syndrome means you actually
want to be in the room you're in, and there's
skills or there's experience that you need to gain in

(42:18):
order to dominate in that room. Imposter syndrome is actually
not self doubt. It's ambition.

Speaker 5 (42:23):
And so explain that a bit because it's always been
said the other way.

Speaker 3 (42:27):
Yeah, And so if you really think about it, if
you walk into a room and you don't feel imposter syndrome,
it's because you don't want to be in that room.
You don't care what people think about you in that room.
If you walk into a room and you feel a
sense of imposter syndrome, it's because you care about what
people think about you in that room. It means your

(42:47):
ambition wants you to succeed in that room. Oh was
like push to stay sharp, correct and also like, hey,
I want to actually succeed around people like this, which
means what are the skills I need? What's the experience
I need to set myself up? This is like a
wave of your calling and your ambition, Like I actually

(43:08):
want to feel good in this room. So it's not
a sign that you don't belong there. It's a sign like, hey,
there's some work to do and you can dominate in
that room too. And so to your question about how
do I have the confidence to do it? I think
it's literally because of the fifteen years of just walking
into rooms and sharing what was going on. And you know,

(43:29):
once the five second rules started to spread around on
social media and people would call me and say, hey,
would you come talk about this thing? And I would
go they weren't paying me. I mean I would stand
at a brown bag lunch twelve years ago and teaching
somebody's office, you know, a little real estate office in
the break room with the fridge. It's got the moldy

(43:49):
food in it. Like that was how I started and
what I gain, what I started to understand, And I
think it explains a lot about like why I am
who I am is that I were all the same
m h. Everybody is dealing with the same stuff. Yes,
it's easier if you have more money and more resources,
but at the end of the day, everybody's got a
family member that they're worried about. Everybody has ambition they're

(44:11):
not tapping into. Everybody has things that they want to
pursue in their life, and they're kind of letting themselves
down a little bit. Everybody struggles with a little bit
of uncertainty and anxiety at times. Everybody has hopes and
dreams and feels a little discouraged and overwhelmed. And when
you start at a baseline that people would love to thrive,

(44:34):
and people thrive when they can, and if they can't,
I believe it's because they're discouraged or there's some skill
building or some experience or you know, some mentorship that's missing.
That's it, but that you're built to thrive. And so
when you really start at that baseline, whether you're like,
you know, I make it a practice. By the way,

(44:55):
this is this is one thing that will change your life.
When you go into a public bath through two things.
I always leave the space better than when I found it.
I always public bathroom no no, no, literally, like literally,
that's why I don't go into that stall. But I

(45:17):
gotta lecause if somebody like destroy especially women, if somebody
destroys the seat, peas all over it and then they leave,
that is a human being that is so disconnected from
the interconnection of the human experience. You are leaving that
for another person, and so making sure that you don't

(45:38):
leave your mess for another person, making sure that you
just kind of wipe down the counter. And then here's
the second thing. If there is a human being cleaning
that bathroom, please look at the AI and say thank
you like that, right, there is a simple thing that
will make you start to shake out of that woe

(45:59):
is me or that's stress or that overwhelm. Let them
know you appreciate and see what they're doing because it
changes who you are. And then you start to see
all day long that there are like you know, I
can't look at you, I'm gonna cry. People are just
walking around disconnected. And the power of starting to be

(46:21):
the one that wakes people up. Hey, you know I
always get an or hey, how is everybody doing? Like
it's shocking how we have gotten so far away from
that sense of community. And there's actually research around this.
They call it either weak ties. I call them warm connections.
Those people that you see in the building every day
that you say hello to the person that's walking the

(46:43):
dog that you you know, know the name of the
dog in your neighborhood. These relationships matter because they make
you feel human again.

Speaker 2 (46:51):
Like you said, it has to get back to community,
has to be to wait at we raise our kids.
We have a six kids, but I have one kid, Jackson,
and he does that times fit and it's just something
that's taught.

Speaker 1 (47:03):
That's seen.

Speaker 2 (47:03):
You know, when we get off an airplane, we think
the pilot. Yes, you know, when he plays basketball, he
thinks the ref, He thanks the coach. He looks them
in the eye and you can see from their reaction
they don't get that that much. But for him, he
always says, I'm grateful because he didn't have to do
that right, And that comes from we have to be
a community again and start teaching from a young age

(47:24):
so our young kids could teach their kids, could teach
their kids.

Speaker 1 (47:27):
Could teach their kids. Because it's kind of like a
lost art mall.

Speaker 4 (47:31):
You just fucked me up with something so simpil too,
because I hate dirty bathrooms. I hate when I walk
in the bathroom if somebody leaves shit in the toilet,
if it's a public restroom, when they leave the toilet
lineer around the stead, I'm like, how.

Speaker 1 (47:43):
Could you do that?

Speaker 4 (47:44):
Like, don't you know somebody else is going to use this?
Even in my own house? You know, I got young kids.
You're not too mad about it, but I'm just like, yo,
pay attention because there's other people that's using these bathrooms,
But you.

Speaker 1 (47:53):
Just explained it in such a way.

Speaker 4 (47:55):
Those people are so disconnected from the human experience yes, people.

Speaker 3 (47:59):
Yes, yes, And like this is where let them comes
in that I think people can can't let them do
that again, Hold on a second, it's it's the reason
why people are so disconnected is because the compounding stress
and overwhelm that comes from allowing the world to beat
you down and the discouragement that compounds that is what

(48:22):
is in people's way. I think we are innately built
and wired to be connected to one another. That is
our nature. We are innately wired to really like stay
connected to ourselves. That is our nature, That is our
intelligent design. It is woven into your DNA and the

(48:43):
state of the world right now, I think is a
reflection of the collective disconnect. You know, I really feel
like there is this massive awakening that is building and
that in life there is always balance between the negativity
and the overwhelm and the toxic stuff that's going on

(49:05):
out in the world and in the headlines, and people
then waking up and going I forgot what mattered. I
forgot why this is important. I need to get to work.
I need to stop whining and worrying and you know,
just gaslighting myself that there's nothing I can do, and
this is oh there's always something you can do. You
have to wake up and recognize that it's not going

(49:27):
to happen out there, it's going to happen in here.

Speaker 5 (49:29):
When you feel the impact from what you're doing with
your book, and to let them theory, like you just
got emotional, not even just about your impact, but just
talking about just change in the world. How does it
make you feel, Like do you take a moment just
of gratitude and be like, because I saw all the
tattoos in the book, and I was like, that's so fire.
It's hard to make people like actually believe something that's

(49:50):
not tangible.

Speaker 3 (49:51):
One of the things that you know, for me, I
spent so many years like hating myself and feeling like
I was a really bad person. And when you get
stuck in life, it's easy to think you're the only one.
And so I'm just literally on a mission to share

(50:13):
whatever I can share and give people access just like
you guys, give people access to incredible thinkers and experts
and resources. You know, your work is reaching some way
halfway around the world that doesn't even have a toilet
in their house, And how incredible is that? And if
I can save anybody the headaches and the heartaches that

(50:35):
I cause myself for the people that I care about,
because I didn't know any better. I didn't know what
the problem was. I didn't know how to change myself.
I didn't know how to push through the emotion that
is a life well lived? Why did you hate yourself though?
Because you can't do anything about what you don't know.
Oh my god, we don't have time. I literally, like
from the amount of cheating I did when I was little,
to the like the undiagnosed anxiety or the undiagnosed to

(50:58):
SLEXI and ADHD and how that created tremendous anxiety, to
the way that childhood trauma impacted me that I didn't
even realize was impacting me, you know, and like it's
just chronic. I just did not think I was a
bad person. And there's a lot of people walking around
that have a hundred times more negative thoughts than they

(51:19):
do positive ones, And a lot of people develop a
habit of being very self critical. It's never enough, like
you're never gonna make it, like you're always so stupid.
Why did you do that? Either because that's how they
were talked to when they were little, or because it's
this like almost protective thing that if you beat yourself
up first, you're going to catch it before other people do.

(51:40):
And I got to a point, and this is an
important thing. The only thing you need to make your
life better is one decision. How I'm living my life
right now and how it feels no longer works for me.
That's all you need to know. If you can have
the courage to say that to yourself, you now know

(52:00):
you now have tipped the first domino because you've made
a decision that you want to change how your life feels.
You made a decision that you want to change how
it feels up here. And for me as a mom,
like your kids absorb the way that you treat yourself.
And so having two daughters that I started noticing, my god,
why are these beautiful young women picking themselves apart? Well

(52:20):
because I do? Why are they so hard on that?
Because I was so hard on myself. That's how they
learn it, And so I don't want them to do
that to themselves. And you know, the thing I was
going to share that's made a huge difference for me
is that I keep the impact front and center. And
so we send an email out five days a week.
There's a person on our team whose job is to

(52:42):
assemble all of the the things that people are saying
all over the world about the books and the podcast,
not about Mel, but about what you learned, and I'll
tell you it every day. There's twenty to thirty of them.
And just the other there was a person who talked
about how he was a stepdad and the relationship ended

(53:07):
and those step kids were his life and he didn't
want to be here anymore. And somebody started to share
the podcast with him and he would go and take
a walk every morning and listen to the podcast, and
it started give him a sense of hope. And now
he uses the let them theory. This is a person
that actually works in like a police operations control center.

(53:28):
Never in a million years would I think this is
somebody that's listening to the Mel Robbins podcast or listening
to this kind of conversation. But it goes to prove
that everybody wants to do well. Everybody wants to thrive,
and you know when you're not doing well. You know
when you're not thriving. The problem for most of us
is just kind of feeling like I don't think this

(53:50):
could change, And the fact is, of course it can change.
If you've ever been happy in your life, you can
be happy again. If you've ever been proud of yourself,
you can be proud of yourself again. If you've ever
forgiven somebody else, you can learn to forgive yourself.

Speaker 1 (54:05):
Mel I know you've got to go through this.

Speaker 4 (54:06):
My last question, how do you receive comments from people
who say Meil Robbins is giving mental health advice with
zero mental health professional training.

Speaker 1 (54:15):
She should let the professionals speak. Let them.

Speaker 3 (54:18):
But here's the thing. I'm not diagnosing anybody. I'm not.
I'm trying to make the intellectual and the academic and
the scientific accessible to all of us. It is so
important that if you are having an issue, you deserve

(54:38):
to work with a mental health professional. I wish that
the whole system would change so that it was accessible.
Like because I think about mental health. I don't think
about mental health like you're crazy. Mental health is thriving.
It's your ability to manage your stress. It's your ability
to push through those moments where life is overwhelming and

(54:59):
build yourself little life raft to keep yourself afloat. Mental
health is like building a muscle, and so I also
think we hear that word and we think some like
clinical depression. If you've got a big issue, go see
a doctor for crying out loud. But we all deserve
to have access to this information and access to the experts,

(55:19):
and so I am absolutely distilling down the world's best research,
just like you are. I'm absolutely sharing my experience, not
because I think I know what's best for you, but because,
by God, if I can save you or one of
your kids or somebody you care about the problems that
I've faced in my life or that my kids have
struggled through because I made dumb mistakes, that is fantastic.

(55:43):
I happily will take that criticism happily.

Speaker 4 (55:47):
And you know, also, God doesn't call to qualify it.
He qualified the called, and you've been called mail Robin.
I feel that I motherfucking love you man.

Speaker 3 (55:53):
I love you too.

Speaker 1 (55:54):
Wow. That's right. Well, we appreciate you for joining us.
It's been too long. You got to come up more often.

Speaker 3 (55:59):
Absolutely, busy guy got to come up to Boston.

Speaker 1 (56:02):
Oh, I loved it. I have a boy. Thank you
for having me on your podcast.

Speaker 3 (56:05):
He's you are. You are literally a day away from
being in the top ten most listened to episodes. Three
point five million people have listened to that episode in
the last four days.

Speaker 1 (56:14):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (56:16):
But that was you were like church you you were channeling.

Speaker 4 (56:18):
But that was God because my wife literally gave me
your book on a Friday and she was like, you
need to read this right now because I was stressing
about some people and she was like, you need to
read this book right now. And I was like, oh,
I'm going to see meil on on Wednesday.

Speaker 1 (56:32):
Literally, So that was just God.

Speaker 4 (56:34):
So I read the book and I got to sit
with you, and now you're here again on the Breakfast Club,
and I just feel full, thank you, thank you.

Speaker 3 (56:41):
I love your new studio, unbelievably cool.

Speaker 1 (56:44):
All right, well it's Mel Robbins. It's the Breakfast Club.
Good morning. Wake that ass up in the morning. Breakfast Club.