Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Fucked a problem, Michael, and I am so sorry that
you faced part of it. There is one joy of
being single with no kids, and it's I have no
real responsibilities.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Go.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
This is the slightly Messy Show with Mike and Meghan.
Speaker 4 (00:20):
State means a messy show for yes, MESSI MiG and Magan.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
It's a slightly messy show with Mike and Meghan.
Speaker 5 (00:29):
That little girl right there, that's my daughter. Her name
is Her name is Cecily. She is now ten years
old and about to go into the fifth grade in
like two weeks.
Speaker 6 (00:39):
What the fifth grade?
Speaker 3 (00:41):
The fifth grade? Megan Macon, that's insane.
Speaker 5 (00:44):
I know. It is a slightly messy show. My name
is Mike along with Meghan. We do this every single Wednesday.
We record it live. So if you want to join
us on TikTok at Megan Macon at on air Mike. Yeah,
Megan's from the Mojo in the Morning Show and I
used to be on the mo Joe in the Morning Show.
Now with the B ninety three Morning Show with Ali
and so we still do our podcast. It's like a
(01:06):
way to catch up, really, way to hang out. It's
been it feels like it's always forever. And it's only
a week apart.
Speaker 6 (01:13):
I know I kicked you off of the show, but
not out of my life.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
No, you can't get rid of me. Get rid of me.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Somebody said to me the other day that you're actually
gonna love this.
Speaker 6 (01:22):
I didn't tell you about this. I was at a
bar antiledo, I went home for.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Jeep Fest that was happening, and this guy came up
to me and.
Speaker 6 (01:33):
I love our listeners, I truly do. But there are
some listeners I'll be quite frank that I love more
than others.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Oh that's fair. You gotta have favorites.
Speaker 6 (01:40):
He's one of them.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Because he came up to me and the first thing
he said was, oh my god, Megan. I go hi,
and he goes, I love the Slightly Messy Show, not
like I love the show, like whatever. He was like,
I listen every week to the Slightly Messy Show. Can
we do a shot together? And I went I normally
say no to shots, but if you will proach me
and say I love the Slightly Messy Show, you and
(02:02):
Mike are hysterical, I want to do a shot.
Speaker 6 (02:05):
I would yep.
Speaker 5 (02:08):
I think we're both we're both like Tinkerbell enough claps,
keep us going, keep.
Speaker 6 (02:15):
Us alive, Please give us our praise and adoration.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
What now I have to know what shot did you do?
Speaker 6 (02:21):
We did tequila.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
Yeah, I will only shoot tequila and breakfast shots.
Speaker 6 (02:28):
And that's really it.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
Really. Yeah, what's a bread Well, what's your go to
breakfast shot?
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Well, it's it's some sort of it's whiskey, but you
can't taste it. It's an orange juice chaser, and I
think it's whiskey and then like a butterscotch liqueur, and
it tastes like waffles and syrup. The shot does, and
then the chaser is like straight up orange juice and
it's so good.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Oh it does sound kind of good.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Yeah, So I'll do a breakfast shot or I'll do tequila.
And that's really it.
Speaker 5 (02:57):
I'm not a shot guy anymore. I used to be
used to be. Now I'm a sipper in my old age.
I'm a sipper ware Monday. I like to just lake
up and start over again. But I've been known to
do a shot or two, going to do it?
Speaker 6 (03:13):
What are you doing?
Speaker 5 (03:15):
I'll tell you what I won't do. I can tell
you more of what I won't do than what I
will do. I will never do a Yeager bomb again,
never in the history of every Oh fuck, no, no,
god no. I would do probably like i'd do a
straight like even like a tequila shot.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
I would do a tequila shot. I would do a.
Speaker 5 (03:35):
Like a maybe a vodka like a quick vodka shot,
but like I don't know, mix some stuff in it.
Speaker 6 (03:41):
So the guy who bought me a shot is in
my chat.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Yeah, Chadhi, Chad, Hello Chad.
Speaker 6 (03:47):
And then he also gave me so do you know
anything about like jeep wrangler culture?
Speaker 3 (03:51):
Like I know the duck thing. That's all I know.
Speaker 6 (03:54):
Perfect.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
He came over to me when I By the way, Chad,
I don't know if you realize this, but I was
drinking at my dad's before we went out to dinner.
Then I got a margarita and you bought me a shot.
I don't drink, and I had four drinks in an
hour and a half. I wasted.
Speaker 6 (04:08):
I was so drunk.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
I stumbled to the bathroom in the back of that restaurant,
and my dad and brother were sober, and I was drunk.
And he came back over near the end and gave
me this little tiny blue duck. It's so little and
it's sitting on my dashboard right now, so I'm taking
it very good care of the blue duck.
Speaker 5 (04:27):
Now, do you pass those ducks along or those are forever?
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Like once you get a duck, your duck.
Speaker 6 (04:31):
The tiny blue duck is mine forever.
Speaker 3 (04:33):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
I have passed other ducks along when I didn't have
ducks to give out. But I have favorites that I
would never give away, and then other ones where I'm like,
we can recycle those.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Do you say anything like you have no ducks to give.
Speaker 6 (04:49):
Wait? I love that. I really want to make Mojo
in the morning ducks to give out.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
Oh people would love that, I know. I thought that.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Would be such a good idea, with like a bar
code to the iHeartRadio at to go right to our podcast.
Speaker 5 (05:03):
I would almost pick your own animal. But ducks work
perfect because everybody knows ducks. That's a great idea.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Do it. Don't just talk about a p about it.
Speaker 6 (05:12):
So what's funny is we don't have a budget.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
Oh that's right, that's money, money please.
Speaker 6 (05:20):
And they said, how are you going to make that happen?
And I said, oh, it's not happening.
Speaker 5 (05:24):
Oh yeah, there's got to be a company that does
it like that, even like one of those T shirt
printing companies can probably make something for ducks.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Yeah, I think.
Speaker 6 (05:34):
If I give them money they would.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
Oh that's right, problem, please please.
Speaker 5 (05:41):
We were talking about my daughter who is in the intro
of the podcast again.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
Her name is Cecily. She's tangling in the fifth grade.
Speaker 5 (05:47):
We have the the open houses. So my son, who
is five, is going to like pre school, like pre
k or whatever.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
I know that one's hit me pretty hard.
Speaker 5 (05:57):
I'm more worried than I was for my daughter for him, Like,
I'm more like there's more anxiety with her.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
I know she's gonna if she's not gonna listen in class.
Speaker 5 (06:06):
At least I know she's making friends, she's having fun,
she's having a good time no matter what.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
No concern with that at all. Social butterfly. I thought.
Speaker 5 (06:14):
My biggest thing was I'm gonna have to pull her
back because she's such a social butterfly. With him, he
is very uh what's the word introverted until you get
to know him, and then he's like this little like
yeah yeah yeah yeah, and not as like the Hulk
stuff has kind of faded away, which is nice and
not really too worried about that. I just more think
(06:35):
it's gonna take him a minute. He might be the
kid that cries when we drop him off, you know
what I mean. It might that might be happening. So
I'm prepping myself for that. But when they when they
send you out you know, your school supply list. They
also send you the open house states, and they also
send you bios of the teachers. And my son has
a mister something I don't remember his name, and my daughter,
(06:56):
I can't even say it. I can't even say it
with the straight face, has a very very attractive teacher,
very attractive teacher, Michael.
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Honestly, my wife is beautiful. I love my wife.
Speaker 5 (07:09):
But for the first time in my daughter's or any
of our kids' school career.
Speaker 3 (07:16):
Or whatever you want to call.
Speaker 5 (07:17):
It, it's not a fifty to sixty year old lady
who's been teaching a long time and is super sweet.
It's a young she's probably the mid thirties. She looks
like it doesn't matter who.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
She looks like.
Speaker 6 (07:31):
She had the biggest celebrity, it would be it.
Speaker 5 (07:34):
Would be like a kind of like a mix of
like Jenny Slate and like.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
A why can't I think of her name, Oh.
Speaker 6 (07:46):
I can't think projects singer. Actress.
Speaker 5 (07:51):
She is a is an actress, kind of like a
Nellie Fertato, a little bit, a little bit of Nellie Fertado.
Speaker 6 (07:58):
Wow, she's still smoking. That woman is taking like a
fine one the dark eyes.
Speaker 5 (08:05):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, So she's a very she's married kids,
all that stuff too. Doesn't matter if she was or
if she wasn't. I just I just looked at the
bio or whatever right.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Now.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
Normally I would prevent you from saying things like this
because this is so dumb of you. But I obviously
would like to marry your wife.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
I'm sure I'll have this conversation with my wife too
at some point.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
No, your wife's so told she's gonna be the one
that's like, oh my god, her teacher was so hot.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Yeah, she's not gonna care.
Speaker 5 (08:34):
And I would never like it's obviously it's just the
first initial reaction to her whatever. But I think every
kid in every person or a parent or whatever, can
remember their first either the kids having their first attractive
teacher or when you had your first like hot teacher.
And I would say mine was probably it was home.
(08:56):
She was a HOMEGG teacher. I forget her name. She
was also the volleyball coach.
Speaker 6 (09:00):
Oh, I know she's hot just from that, right, right?
Speaker 3 (09:05):
What was yours?
Speaker 6 (09:05):
Okay? So mine was in high school. There was a
couple of them.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
And the funny thing is this guy was so hot
that we all had.
Speaker 6 (09:14):
He was an elective teacher kind of like yours as well.
So it wasn't like, oh, I hope I get him.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
It was you were getting to your counselor's office the
first day you could sign up for classes the next year,
and you were trying to get into that specific elective
as quickly as possible because his class is always filled up,
and they're like, wow, these kids are.
Speaker 6 (09:32):
Really into this specialty.
Speaker 5 (09:34):
No.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
No, we all wanted an hour with him because he
was a soccer coach and just like volleyball. When I
said soccer coach, you knew how hot he was just
by that statement, Sam.
Speaker 5 (09:47):
Yes, because like you don't want a stereotype, right, you
don't want to say the volleyball coach is always hot
or the soccer coaches.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Just the way it panned out, you know.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
What, everybody knows who this guy is. He was the
soccer cu and the art teacher. He was creative, artistic
and hot and athletic, like like, it's.
Speaker 6 (10:08):
Not fair to have all of that in one person.
My body rejects it.
Speaker 5 (10:12):
It's the look or the it's the to make my
feel itself feel better about what I just said too,
it's the look I imagine my wife and laugh.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
My wife had when she saw the soccer coach.
Speaker 5 (10:22):
Uh at our at our school when my daughter was
was uh started soccer for like a summer, and this
soccer coach was like being like a almost like a
father figured to cicily, and she was high fiving him
and she was smiling. And then I like showed my
wife the picture and she started smiling real big, and
I went, oh, it's the hot soccer coach. It's always
(10:43):
a soccer coach, and it's always the volleyball coach, home
act teacher. UH.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
Sometimes the art teacher, sometimes the art teacher.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
I would say, mostly the even like kind of weirdo
art teachers still kind of hot because they're talented. I
will also say that when I at my first high school,
I did crew, which is competitive rowing, and our coach
was like twenty five covered in tattoos, right like full sleeves,
(11:13):
all like on the chest, everything, full legs like he
had to and we never obviously saw him not clothes,
but he had to have had a full bodysuit like
he just like you could tell he probably had a
full bodysuit. And he was smoking hot with a great body,
so it was like not fair. But he was a
lawyer during the day and then he would come and
coach us in the afternoons, so he always showed up
(11:35):
in a fully buttoned up tie, and every once in
a while you would see a peak of the tattoos
on his wrist and we were like, oh. And then
one day it was super hot outside and he unbuttoned
his leaves and rolled up because he, let's be honest,
he wasn't wearing that at home.
Speaker 6 (11:50):
He wasn't going out with his friends and wearing.
Speaker 1 (11:51):
A full suit, right, But at practice he wore a
full suit so we didn't see his tattoos.
Speaker 6 (11:55):
And at work he wore a full suit. And one
day he rolled up his sleeves and we were all like.
Speaker 5 (12:00):
He's an octopuss on his arms so hot. We I
don't even want to go to the open house because
I just feel like I'm going to say something stupid,
like like I already have with this entire thing, but
I feel like I'm going to say something stupid like
I just want to go to my son's where it's
like a guide teacher, and I'll help my loo get
(12:21):
his thing in, get his get all situated, get get
his seats.
Speaker 3 (12:25):
I just don't want to go. I don't want to go.
I don't think it's a good idea.
Speaker 6 (12:29):
Have you done the school shopping yet?
Speaker 3 (12:30):
Yeah? Yeah, yeah, we've already done back to school.
Speaker 5 (12:33):
We got a couple of things to get still, like
shoes in, like a lunch box or whatever.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
But outside of that, yeah, we're done.
Speaker 6 (12:40):
Is that a fight in your household?
Speaker 3 (12:42):
What?
Speaker 4 (12:42):
Like?
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Does sess want stuff that you guys are like, I'm
not spending all of this money on all of us,
You're not going to use.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
It and not what you would think.
Speaker 5 (12:50):
But yes, so it's I always for me, it was shoes, shoes,
and close. I wanted certain shoes that my parents couldn't afford,
and my kids aren't to the point where they're begging
for specific clothes yet.
Speaker 6 (13:04):
Right.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
The only thing that she did say is.
Speaker 5 (13:07):
That I don't want to wear as many rainbows and
unicorns because I want to be more like a woman.
Speaker 3 (13:12):
No, it's killing me on the inside. She did. She
still did get some, but not as much, not as much.
Speaker 4 (13:18):
Not every outfit, no exactly exactly, but hers is more
like she wants specific like pencils, and she wants specific
art stuff, and she they have headphones for her school,
and so I went out and got her.
Speaker 5 (13:33):
She wanted these like Unicorn ones or whatever, but they
were like from like five below, so they're gonna break
in a week. I went out and got her, like
the Sony's like the really good like radio headfun yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (13:46):
And so I'm like, you're gonna because that's like my industry.
No no, it's like you your dad's in radio and
you got Unicorn headphones that break in fi. No, no, no, no,
you need to you need to be able to produce
something if if if required by school, if called upon
by school.
Speaker 6 (14:02):
She had those studio versions.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
I broke four pairs of those before I started by
Do you know how many comments we get on our
social media?
Speaker 6 (14:10):
Why is the I'm wearing Apple heads? Not? Because bitch?
Speaker 1 (14:13):
When you breaking up four hundred dollars pair of headphones
I'm not doing it anymore.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
Oh yeah, because guess what, I've.
Speaker 6 (14:19):
Been doing these just fine for five years.
Speaker 5 (14:22):
She will lose those, though, I need hers to be
the bit. I'm only gonna get these ones obviously for uh,
for the reason of you.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
Mostly.
Speaker 5 (14:33):
Yeah, but she can't lose these. They're too big, they're
they're giant, ridiculous headphones. But outside of that, it's she
hasn't really been like begging for anything yet.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
I think it's coming.
Speaker 5 (14:43):
I think in the next couple of years she's gonna
I think what will happen this year I'm guessing is
that it's fifth grade. Some of the friends are gonna
start being a little more mature, some of the friends.
She's on the young end of of of her great
age range. Some of her friends are going to st
doing cooler things, or what they call is cooler. And
then she's going to grow out of some things and
(15:05):
then eventually start wanting those things.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
But especially because she's the oldest, I feel like when
you're the oldest, it's easy to cling on to the
young stuff when you have little siblings, Like.
Speaker 6 (15:15):
I think my brother would admit that when you're a
certain age kid, you don't want to watch Barnie anymore? Right,
Like that's not cool?
Speaker 1 (15:22):
Right, But if you cut home and Barney's on for
your little sister, sure, lift down.
Speaker 6 (15:26):
I mean, I just want to sit down after school.
It's not because this is on the.
Speaker 3 (15:30):
Legs are my legs are tired, but the rest.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
If Megan's watching Barney, it would be rude for me
to turn it off.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
You know.
Speaker 5 (15:38):
That's how Blue is in our house, right, Yeah, it's
the exact same thing. Yeah, but Milo is on the
young end of that all so or he's gonna end
up being on the old and that's why he's going
to pre K so when he gets there, he'll be
at the older end of that.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
I'm trying to I'm more trying to push more.
Speaker 5 (15:54):
Things on them then I think there are I should
like step back because eventually they're gonna begging me for
things that cost a lot of money. But like, I'm like, Milo,
why don't we get the Benny Hardaways. They're like an
addition that you, like I wanted as a kid but
couldn't get, But you can get them right now and
they're so much cheaper at this.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
No, Dad, I want the I want the one.
Speaker 5 (16:14):
I want the crocs with the giblets on it, and
I want the I want, Yeah, he doesn't.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
They don't care.
Speaker 5 (16:19):
They don't care yet. They want cool, They want cool
shirts like they want. He wants a Spider Man shirt. Yep,
but it's not like he doesn't need a name brand
Spider Man shirt.
Speaker 6 (16:28):
Right. So I was the kid who wanted like Lisa
Frank and in.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
Sync folders, yes, And my dad said, we have Manila
folders at home, and I was like, but we need
pockets in our folders. And then he would walk over
to the ten cent bin and go, what color red, yellow,
blue or green like that?
Speaker 6 (16:45):
That's what I got growing up? Or the really cute
like flowers or girl Power or Spice Girl spiral notebook.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
Nope, they've got a white one right here, and it's
twenty c.
Speaker 6 (16:56):
This what we're getting.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
What was your favorite like back to school thing like.
Speaker 6 (17:00):
To shop for? Specifically?
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Backpacks were always a pretty big deal. Backpacks were like
that was your statement piece. But I will also say
that for a portion of a portion of my back
to school I was in a private school, so the
only real things you got to shop for was, oh, yeah,
like shoes, that was but you only got to choose
(17:26):
from like three different.
Speaker 3 (17:26):
Shoes, and you had to wear uniforms, right, mm hmm.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
So it was either Birkenstacks, Doc Martin's, or Sperry's. Those
are your three choices, okay uh. And then your winter
coat was the only other real choice that you had.
And because we were all basic bitches, we all bought
the same coat and different colors because we are the.
Speaker 6 (17:45):
Generation of north Face wears. So it was what color
Northace are you going to get to stand out?
Speaker 1 (17:51):
And I went black because I'm an idiot, So I
just blended in with all of the boys.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
All the same. I remember it was.
Speaker 5 (18:00):
It was the pullover starter jackets that were big for
a hot second. Yeah, but I never got like mine
was always clothes, but I never got the name brand stuff,
which is probably why I focus on it now, which
I shouldn't.
Speaker 3 (18:13):
But I always got like I wanted Jordan's.
Speaker 5 (18:14):
I got and ones because my mom saw the basketball
player on him and thought, oh, yeah, that's Jordan's. That's
the same thing. What's the difference are the shacks from Walmart?
Like those are the things that I would get and
like I always wanted like the Jordans and the yeezis
and all that stuff.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
This is where I feel like a brat because I
was very privileged to grow up.
Speaker 6 (18:33):
In the household that I did.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
So I remember like limited two day was a big day, okay,
Like you went there to get all of your clothes
for back to school Limited to and if you were
really lucky, you might get your first brawl. Like oo,
you felt like you were going to run shit if
you got.
Speaker 6 (18:50):
A brawl that year, You're like, I am unstoppable.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
And then at a certain point I switched over to
the most basic bitches of all stores for Krombie and Fitch,
where we all got the same jeans and same polos
and different colors.
Speaker 3 (19:04):
Yes, yeah, so I wore a polo.
Speaker 1 (19:06):
As a uniform and then my clothes were all just
colored polos.
Speaker 6 (19:10):
I swear to God.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
From age like ten to fifteen, all I wore was polos.
Speaker 3 (19:17):
I wore.
Speaker 5 (19:18):
I will so my stepbrother who was who was much
taller and like completely opposite of me, very short or
I'm very short. He's incredibly tall, but he would always
like have cool clothes because his parents, his you know,
his mom or whatever, would buy him all these cool
clothes and so I'd get like the hand me down sometimes,
but none.
Speaker 3 (19:38):
Of it fit because it was all like a tall person.
Speaker 5 (19:41):
So there are pictures of me and like, again, I
don't know why.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
I don't know why.
Speaker 5 (19:46):
I thought I was cool in this with a Fubu jersey,
but the Fulu jersey's way too big for me.
Speaker 3 (19:51):
And it's a fulu jersey.
Speaker 6 (19:53):
Do we have a picture?
Speaker 3 (19:54):
Oh? Absolutely, I'll send it to you. I'll send it
to you. Yeah. Oh it's terrible. Did I screen?
Speaker 5 (19:59):
I didn't scre I was just looking at it in
my Instagram or I'd have lion stuff, but it was
like my brother's lion stuff, so it was all way
too big for me.
Speaker 6 (20:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Yeah, I'm trying to think it was oh oh oh,
oh oh. I wasn't allowed to wear it, but I
had one that I hid from my parents. There used
to be these shirts you would get and they were
in like a two inch by two inch cube and
you would open up the plastic wrap and they would
look like egg cartons and they would stretch out.
Speaker 6 (20:30):
But like, well, here's the thing. It would be like
a T shirt, but if.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
You were one of the cool girls, you wouldn't stretch
it all the way down in your waistline.
Speaker 6 (20:39):
You would like keep it like a belly shirt and
wear that out.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
And I had one, but I was scared that I
was gonna get caught in it, so I never wore
it as a belly shirt.
Speaker 6 (20:47):
But I did have one, and I wasn't supposed.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
To oo yeah, and it was purple and silver ombre,
because that's what you're looking for when you're trying to
hide something metallic and bright color.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
Bright color. That's my my, my, uh, not my fear.
Speaker 5 (21:03):
But the thing that I'm gonna gonna have to watch
out for, and I have no idea how to watch
out for is sess eventually, someday like five years, four
or five years from now, is gonna want to wear
something that I'm gonna say, There's no There's no fucking
way you are wearing that out of this house right now.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
I'm that statement.
Speaker 5 (21:17):
That statement to me, like there are a bunch of
other things I've done where I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm
a dad, Oh yeah, I've hit dad level. But when
I say the statement there is no way you're wearing
that out of the house, that yeah, picture.
Speaker 6 (21:29):
Me above you going labor all up.
Speaker 5 (21:33):
Well, my fear is she's gonna she's gonna walk out
of the house and do it anyways, So like, how
do I do you know what? I mean, She's gonna
hide it in a backpack or something, or a friend's
gonna have it, and she's gonna change the second she
gets out of the house. So I have to find
the balance of like not being over protective but also
not being like, hey, go ahead, you could wear that
seat through shirt if you want to wear it.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
I don't give a shit.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
I mean there's appropriate listen to levels of like that,
like is see through versus those those are you gonna
wear shorts or a tank top versus a T shirt?
Speaker 3 (22:07):
Like there are level Yeah, is like a little bit different.
Yeah that was.
Speaker 6 (22:12):
Wild, dude. I can defend that.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
But you're like, it's an inch above her waistline, because
that's like the first like step for kids is not
a belly shirt, but the one that's.
Speaker 6 (22:20):
Just slightly above the waistline.
Speaker 5 (22:25):
She had something on, she had something it was what
was it was it a tank top or something, but
it wasn't above anything. But when she like reached up,
it raised up and I looked over at Alley, I go,
what is she wearing right now?
Speaker 3 (22:36):
She goes, you better stop now. Yep, she's you better
stop now.
Speaker 6 (22:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (22:40):
I was like, I'm gonna say something, You're not gonna
say something. God, you could see her. I think I
even use the word mid drift.
Speaker 6 (22:46):
Oh my god, Oh my god, you're such a dad.
Speaker 3 (22:51):
I'm trying. I'm fighting it. I'm full on fighting it.
Speaker 6 (22:54):
I wonder how.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
Much of that, too, is a reaction to our parents,
because I wonder how much of it is like if
you don't acknowledge it, she doesn't think it's that cool
or like risky, like or not allowed, So I must
do it so I can feel like an adult versus
if you're like totally nonchalant and don't care, it's probably
not that big of a deal.
Speaker 3 (23:14):
You're one hundred percent. I think you're You're a hundred
percent onto something I do. I really think you're right
on that.
Speaker 5 (23:19):
Because she doesn't want to be not like she's doing
it for like anybody to look or anybody's attention, right,
She just wants to feel like a like a woman.
Keeps saying, I'm becoming a woman, dad, becoming.
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Important that because she's at the age where she's probably
friends with kids that are probably starting puberty too, and
you're like, I want to fit.
Speaker 6 (23:41):
In and I want to be one of them.
Speaker 1 (23:42):
And when she looks up, I know her and Alley
are super close.
Speaker 6 (23:46):
And like you watch people.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
In stage and in television movies and they're all older
kids and teenagers.
Speaker 6 (23:53):
You're like, I just want to be grown up, and
then as soon as it happens, you're like, take me
back to Bluey.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
That's what I follow.
Speaker 5 (24:04):
Me followed the Slightly Messy Show on IG at Slightly
Messy Show. So, speaking of what I called myself old
because I'm becoming old, I'm a I'm a line away
from wearing you know, new new balances and talking about
my AARP. Yeah, but you had an incident with a
with an older gentleman.
Speaker 6 (24:25):
I almost throat punched a seventy year old man and
I'm still angry about it. And this happened over the weekend.
I'm really still fucking mad.
Speaker 3 (24:35):
What did he do?
Speaker 1 (24:36):
So? I was at like a specialty grocery store. I
think you saw my Instagram where I got my orange
flavored kid cats.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
I did not. Maybe maybe I did.
Speaker 6 (24:47):
Maybe it was Ali. I saw one of you had
seen it Anyways.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
I probably did.
Speaker 6 (24:50):
Let me tell you.
Speaker 1 (24:51):
I said, a specialty grocery store, and it blew my
fucking mind. And I had such a great time there,
and I found so many good snacks. Okay, I have
green tea candy at my apartment right now, and so good.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
Every market is it just like a specialty store.
Speaker 6 (25:06):
I went to like an Asian grocery store.
Speaker 3 (25:08):
Okay, okay, but it's like massive.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
In Toledo, and I'd never been there before, but I
was looking for some MSG and.
Speaker 6 (25:14):
I was like, you know, who's gonna have it? That
grocery store.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
And then I went there and I bought eight million
snacks that I didn't need, and all of them were incredible.
I got mango cakes that were just they were like
fig Newtons, but mango.
Speaker 6 (25:25):
God damn.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
They blew my mind. So we tried a whole bunch
of stuff. All of it was really really good. Anyways,
So when we get to the cash register, there's two
cash registers in this grocery store, no self checkout, no nothing,
just two cash registers. That's how small it is. Okay,
and only one of them has an employee working at it.
But this line starts building up now my brother and
I probably have four or five items. Each person in
(25:49):
front of us.
Speaker 6 (25:50):
Did a full grocery run.
Speaker 1 (25:52):
I mean they sell everything there, so like they have
full grocery carts, and then the guys behind me all
have full grocery everybody's there is doing their normal shop.
We're like fun treats, fun treats. We're getting fun treats.
But this line starts building up behind us again. We
are next in line behind this giant grocery cart, and
somebody walks over to the other register and goes.
Speaker 6 (26:13):
I'm gonna open this lane up.
Speaker 1 (26:16):
The old man behind me with a full grocery car bolt,
he starts. I've never seen an old man push a
grocery cart with that much weight in it so fast
in my entire life.
Speaker 6 (26:27):
I was like, are you mister incredible? I did not
know that you had this in you And he just
dashes over to the other one.
Speaker 1 (26:36):
Isn't it the proper grocery store or cash register etiquette
that when a new register opens, the person next in
line gets to go over first.
Speaker 5 (26:51):
No, No, it's not, No, it is not it is.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
It depends it.
Speaker 5 (26:57):
There is a there is a level of of who
should go next. So were you the next person up
or were you a couple people back?
Speaker 1 (27:05):
No, I was the next person up with the least
amount of items. I will let It wasn't even like
the person behind me had one item. Person behind me
have fifty items.
Speaker 5 (27:15):
I think the person who's next up stays in line
because you're next up, in the in the in the
in the checkout, the third person in line has the
right to go now long.
Speaker 3 (27:26):
What I will say.
Speaker 5 (27:27):
What I will say is you have a little amount,
I would have let you go first. I would have
let you go first because you have the least amount.
Speaker 6 (27:34):
No, I have the right.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
Away if there are fifty items in front of me
and fifty items behind me, Now I have to wait
for fifty items on both registers even though I'm next.
Speaker 5 (27:44):
No, because you're next in that line. So you you're
already set, right, You're already set. You should have already.
Speaker 6 (27:49):
Checking out right now.
Speaker 5 (27:51):
You could, you could. You should be the way that
the lines work. You should have already started unloading your
stuff onto that belt because your next full.
Speaker 3 (28:01):
Okay, but I.
Speaker 6 (28:01):
Couldn't even get the runner on it because.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
It was.
Speaker 5 (28:06):
You're already in though you are next up, you are
next up. That would in theory, you should have already
started unloading, and like you would have had to have
taken all of your stuff off of this thing. The
third person, however, is probably the one who who should
be up. You should already be looking at extra stuff
in line, because you've already gone as far as you
(28:27):
can into that line.
Speaker 3 (28:29):
You are next up. You are the next person.
Speaker 5 (28:31):
It's silly for the next person to almost jump back
and then jump over the third person. However, that person
should go over again. I will say this, you had
to look at your faces present you had least stuff,
So I would have in that scenario, if I'm that
old guy, I would have said, go ahead, you couldn't go,
and then I would have probably followed you over because
(28:52):
that person in front of me also has fifty things.
So I would have followed you over, gone with the
less amount in line, and then that done it that way,
knowing that you would probably go no, no, no, go ahead,
because you you you shouldn't go next, you should go
next in the line that you're in.
Speaker 6 (29:10):
We're about to do so. Were you a part of
the McDonald's drive through discussion. We had a mojo in
the morning.
Speaker 3 (29:15):
I was there.
Speaker 5 (29:16):
Yes, I don't think it was Yeah to break.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
This down, yeah, because I don't think people properly understood
what I was saying. And I also then realized since
moving here, Ohio and Michigan actually have different drivess.
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Okay, so you can draw it out for me. Yes, okay,
she agrees. I just want to put that on with you.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
Way to be wrong, Amber, Okay, there are two different
kinds of drive through lines that I have now realized.
When there are two places to order in the McDonald's, okay,
so way we're going to do Ohio down here.
Speaker 6 (29:54):
And then we're going to do Michigan over here.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
So in Ohio's there is something like that, Okay, usually
something right here, and then the little boxes to order
this is I'm sorry if you're listening to the podcast,
but I need to prove that I'm right about this, and.
Speaker 6 (30:13):
Then these are like this, and then it funnels down
like into right I think.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
So I might be wrong about the Michigan one, but
I know I'm right about the Ohio one. Okay, Okay,
So in Ohio we're just gonna cover this up. In Ohio,
it's one single lane that splits into two, right, these
two lettle boxes are where you order this circle.
Speaker 6 (30:31):
Right here is a curb they have installed.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
And because this is a single lane, if there are
like a bunch of cars, sorry I'm trying to draw
backwards on the other side of a piece of paper,
somebody over.
Speaker 6 (30:42):
Here will speed.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
Around and go into this lane around the curb instead
of waiting in this line and splitting at the v
like you're supposed to. Oh that okay, that's not what
drives throughs look like in Michigan. And so when I
was explaining this, everybody Michigan called me the biggest idiot on.
Speaker 6 (31:01):
The planet, and I'm like, no, you're not.
Speaker 1 (31:04):
Now, I actually think Michigan does it better because you're
able to divide up the line in a way that
doesn't back up into the street. It's smarter. But the
way I sound makes me sound crazier. But I was right,
and I just want to I just want to make
sure everybody knows I was right then and I'm right now.
Speaker 6 (31:20):
You absolutely drew the third person in line cut in
front of you.
Speaker 5 (31:25):
Let me let me say, all right, so this is
what and I've drawn on a piece of paper to
two lines here right this person is checking out. This
person has already put their stuff on the on the
on the belt and is likely paying right now.
Speaker 3 (31:39):
Based on the scenario you gave me, which.
Speaker 1 (31:40):
You weren't paying, they had fifty A I'm still to chuck.
Speaker 5 (31:45):
That might change it a little bit, am I say
the way, well, because they haven't unloaded yet. If they
haven't unloaded yet, if you if they've unloaded and they're
about to pay, that means you are literally next up.
You are in already, you are about to unload your
stuff right here, so you are already in the line
technically in that bubble of the line.
Speaker 3 (32:02):
You going out of there almost disrupts everything.
Speaker 5 (32:04):
Because you got to back out and get out and
then go over to the next one. The third person
in line hasn't even entered the checkout space yet, hasn't
even check it out, so they easily could go now
over to this one, and you're still up next.
Speaker 3 (32:19):
The only thing is is you're not going next. That's it.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
So instead of doing my transaction in the next two
and a half minutes, I have to wait let's say,
five minutes for the person in front of me to
check out, and now five minutes for the person next
to me to check out. So essentially, even though I
was in line first, I'm gonna get out of there
later than people who got in the line behind me.
Speaker 3 (32:40):
Now, it does vary.
Speaker 5 (32:42):
The only thing I would say that you should go
next is if that person just walked up and you're
and are still unloading. That does change it a little bit,
because then you're now, yes, gonna wait, you're not gonna wait.
But if they are paying in that moment they are
about done.
Speaker 6 (32:56):
Oh sure, if it's gonna be a two second way,
I'm gonna wave you want. That was not the case.
That wasn't the scenario. That is not the facts of
the situation.
Speaker 3 (33:05):
Okay, all right, all right, all right, you got me,
You got me, You got me, you got me.
Speaker 1 (33:08):
Here's how we knew from the beginning of this story
this man was in the wrong. Okay, because I told you,
a seventy year old man with a full ass grocery
cart ran like.
Speaker 6 (33:17):
He knew he was in the wrong. He knew that
if he was in the right, he could.
Speaker 1 (33:22):
Casually walk over and be like, it's my turn. But
he knew it wasn't his turn, so he said, I
have to beat her there. So I can establish dominance,
so he knew he was in the wrong lot.
Speaker 5 (33:34):
There's a lot of like moral things there too that
didn't get addressed, Like you would have let an eighty
year old man go to the thing because he's eighty
years old, and that's the polite thing to do, but
he ran, and that almost makes it go No, now,
I don't want to do that. Now, I don't want
to be polite because you're being a dig. And then
the other thing is, is he on the other end
(33:56):
should have been like, oh, you have the least amount,
you just go first. That's the always the polite thing
to do, the right thing to do is to let
the person with at least them out go first, because otherwise, yes,
that person's waiting fifty fucking.
Speaker 3 (34:07):
Items and they have three.
Speaker 5 (34:09):
Right, A lot of shit didn't happen right there, Right,
A lot of shit didn't happen.
Speaker 6 (34:13):
Right, That's what I was looking for. Thank you.
Speaker 3 (34:15):
You just let me to say you're right, You're right, Megan, Yes,
because I.
Speaker 6 (34:19):
Think there is something in our industry.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
I don't know if it's our building, our show, or
our industry where it is impossible for anybody to say,
I think Megan's right about this, because even if I
am very clearly right the way the conversation turns to,
I think we should all gang up on her in gaslight,
right her because it will be funny. I think is
(34:44):
gonna put me over the edge one of these days.
And I used to think, you know, one day that's
I'm gonna explode, And now it's like, it's today the day?
Speaker 3 (34:53):
Is it? Today?
Speaker 6 (34:53):
Is it? Today? Is today? The day? Then I just
walk out.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
There are many elements.
Speaker 5 (34:58):
I'm not guess that there are many elements here that
I would say if it was a little different, then
that man should have gone first. I agree, But if
we if we had a judge, uh, that would to court.
The facts. The facts do prove that that you, you,
in fact, are the.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
Right on this one.
Speaker 6 (35:17):
Thank you, Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
I will take my settlement in the form of first
in line pass the next time I go side.
Speaker 3 (35:25):
Note they need to make those first in line passes.
Speaker 5 (35:28):
Could you imagine as you imagine like it like a
Disney ticket, like what are those Disney fast passes?
Speaker 3 (35:32):
And you got to avoid the line.
Speaker 6 (35:34):
It would be really.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Nice if it came from being kind to the employees,
like if you don't yell at somebody when they're autist
dacas something like you get a first in line pass,
thank you for being reasonable?
Speaker 5 (35:44):
Oh yeah, but do you ever like I don't remember
the last time I yelled at an employee, but I
remember the last time I yelled at a machine recently.
Like when you go to those self checkouts and you
clearly have scanned everything perfectly, but it says you need
assistance from somebody. I always like get mad because they're
accusing me of stealing, Like what you think I'm stealing?
Speaker 3 (36:03):
Watch the camera, watch the I'm not stealing.
Speaker 5 (36:07):
For some reason, and an item is off and we
need to check it with it In this one employeess
gott to come over put their stupid card in or
whatever they have to do.
Speaker 1 (36:14):
It's getting worse. There are new checkouts with cameras that
film you while you're checking out.
Speaker 6 (36:19):
And when you do self checkout.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
Do you pick one item up, scan it, put it
in a bag, pick one item up, scan it, put
it in a bag, or do you pick up a
few things scan place in a bag, scan place in
a bag.
Speaker 5 (36:32):
I depend I guess probably both, probably both, because I've
done it one way. If it's it's like larger items,
right if it's something you know, But if it's a
few smaller items, I might do it like that.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
New system recognizes that you have items in your hand,
h and it will flag you for stealing. And then
an employee has to come over and review the footage
to make sure you didn't place that item that you
didn't scan yet into the bag.
Speaker 6 (36:59):
And I go, it's still in my hand. What are
you talking?
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Like if I have two cans of soup and I
scan when I put in a bag and then I
go to scan the other one, it won't let me
scan it.
Speaker 6 (37:07):
And he goes, did she steal the can of soup? No, bitch,
steal my fucking hand.
Speaker 3 (37:12):
I wonder why they did that.
Speaker 6 (37:13):
Yes, it's so annoying.
Speaker 3 (37:15):
Oh my god, I fucking I was wondering why they
did that.
Speaker 1 (37:18):
It's taking longer now to self checkout than it would
be if you just paid employees.
Speaker 6 (37:22):
To check out.
Speaker 5 (37:23):
They should do it like they like Target does it
where they show you on camera the whole time.
Speaker 3 (37:28):
It's always a hideous fucking version of of.
Speaker 5 (37:31):
Like the worst possible fucking film I've ever seen in
my entire life, The worst version of it because A
I look at it and I go, oh, Jesus, I
you get away from this machine immediately, but also like
knowing that I like that, knowing there's a giant screen
in front of you, like I would. I'm always particular
when I load things into Target because I don't want
(37:51):
them to think that I'm stealing.
Speaker 3 (37:53):
Look at me scanned this shirt. Oh and then this pencil.
Speaker 6 (37:58):
Babe.
Speaker 5 (37:59):
They to do it like Target nuts, man, me nuts.
So are you gonna go back to the store? Are
you gonna fight this man?
Speaker 7 (38:09):
No?
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Do you know how I resolved this whole issue. I
looked at him and I went, Okay, my guy cool.
And the lady behind me laughed and he just pretended
like he couldn't hear me, and I went okay, my
god cool, and he oh.
Speaker 3 (38:25):
Do you think what do you think that was gonna do?
Like he was gonna go, oh, sorry, bro, I got you, no,
But I.
Speaker 1 (38:33):
Wanted him to know that I recognized what he did
was shitty.
Speaker 5 (38:40):
So if you were that old man who probably doesn't
know how to listen to a podcast or watch TikTok,
it's for you.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
It's a slightly missy showed up, pathetic, absolutely pathetic love
the show.
Speaker 3 (38:55):
You guys are doing a great job with Mike and
Megan