August 6, 2024 • 11 mins
A pair of pole vaulters take the Olympic spotlight for very different reasons....
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It'll be a humble brag he uses the rest of
his life. It's one more thing.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
I'm strung and geddy, one more thing.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
I mean, a guy who could have meddled in the
pole vault but knocked the bar off because his manhood
is too big. Is the sort of thing you pretend
to complain about throughout your life.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Right, menshonse is constantly getting in my way. For instance,
there was the Paris Olympics. Perhaps you saw it.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Yeah, it's kind of a drag. I mean, I'm so
big down there, and it hurt my pole vaulting career.
What my poll ruined my poll vault exactly? So anyway,
we got a couple of pole vault stories for you.
One of them uh comedy, one of them real. This
is from John Oliver's show on HBO.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
The men's one hundred meters finals were on Sunday, where
American Noah Lyles got the gold medal by five thousands
of a second. This was the closest finish in over
forty years. And I don't want to take anything away
from no Allows, but isn't this a tie?
Speaker 2 (01:02):
I mean, wouldn't we even have.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
Ties for if we're not gonna pull it out for
stuff like this. I mean, in fact, if you were
watching this with just your eyes, all these guys finished
at the same time. Really, if these guys were trains,
no one would say my train was late. Another Olympic
moment getting a lot of attention. A pole vaulter lost
when his giant shlong.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
On the crossbarm.
Speaker 4 (01:30):
But this has gotta be the best possible way to lose.
I will say, next Olympics, this guy should compete in
one hundred meters. He'd win from ten feet back.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Oh no, let's be better than that. Let's say, come.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
On, as long is an unerrated word, it's not gonna
start using it more often.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Yeah, yeah, I work with children.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
And I agree with that one hundred meters saying, you
look at it, it was a tie at five of
them more.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
At the same speed. It's a race.
Speaker 3 (01:59):
The one guy's finished before the other guy five one
thousandths of a second, mister, trophies for everyone. Was the
attitude that ruined America. What would they have done without
modern technology? If it was just eyeballs, they had to
call it a tie, wouldn't they. Well, remember a photo
finish was like film back in the day. And you
couldn't fire off that many frames.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
So yeah, I suspect they would have called it a tie,
right because it was five one thousandth of a second,
which is an unimaginable amount of time. Yeah you yeah, Well,
if the technology is accurate in assessing that that dude,
yeah he passed or he hit the plane five one
thousandths of a second before the other dude, Well then
(02:40):
I guess you use it.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
But I kind of see your point in that. You're
I mean, what if it was like one one millionth
of a second, Well, well, you're right, exactly right, or like,
you know, there's some sort of vibrating electron measuring device
that is, you know, it's one trillionth of whatever point.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
But the pole ball guy could have just flopped it
forward across the line, all right, yeah, long flop forward.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Swanstuka is my favorite from the draw.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I know somebody who regularly refers to it as a penis,
and I just find that as off putting as anything
could be.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
I don't know why the actual word what are you child? Huh?
It's uh so what do you prefer? I don't think
it's a well crafted word.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
For one thing, I would I would like a different word, well,
not different vowels, and Katy.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Asks what I prefer, and that's where I have to
uh not answer because it depends on the setting obviously.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Ah yeah, well all right, you're at your urologist's office,
I call it my penis.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
If I'm at the urologist, I suppose.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
But see, I don't like.
Speaker 3 (03:54):
I think long vowels make words tougher to take, like
vrgina is easier to take than the other.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
One, the vagina, pennis? What is easier to take than penis?
I don't know why.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
I'm curious about this, Katie. I'm gonna try to keep
this like above sophomore level, but I am curious. So like,
if you were going to go to the doctor and
you were having you who problems, would you say, I
got a X problem with my vagina?
Speaker 2 (04:27):
Is that what you would say? Yeah, probably you would.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
I guess doctor, what else are you going to say?
I don't know, and don't offer any choices.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
One rhymes with scooter, Hey, doc, something's wrong with the skater.
Speaker 3 (04:52):
Like happ a Lachian doctor or something? What was I'm
so bad at Saturday Night Live? I don't watch that much.
But Kate McKinnon, Yeah, her character that got him to
a Yeah, really unfortunate. Yeah, don't even Yeah, that's interesting if.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
You want to google it.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Now we have actual pull vulter, best poll vulter in
the world.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Buy a lot.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
I didn't know this, but like, if he enters the competition,
it's not does he win or not, it's by how much?
And he's been doing this for years and he's got
all the world records, which I can explain in just
a little bit of the shame.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
We'll have to shoot him for treason. Okay, I want
to hear that.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Mando do Plantis. Here's what it sounded like in Paris.
It was the only event going on at the very
end of the night. He'd already won the gold medal,
but he is gonna go ahead and jump is one
more time to see if he could set a gold medal,
a world world record.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
Mando de Plantis world records.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
He does on his back. He's so he's so used
to setting world records, it's not even that for him.
He just lands on his back, jumps up, runs over,
kisses his hot model girlfriend to make sure she gets
some FaceTime because they are crafty with the way they
make money. She gets some FaceTime, everybody becomes aware of
her name, which helped her and him. And he's got
in his contract that he makes fifty thousand dollars or
(06:15):
something like that every time he sets a world record,
So rather than raise the bar to what he thinks
he can jump, he raises it by the minimum amount
every single time. So that's how he's set like fifteen
world records in the last two years. Every competition he
just raises it a timey bit. So he's always setting
a world record. Who knows how high he could jump
if he went as high as he wanted, and uh,
(06:38):
you know I do know no rules against that.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Yeah, yeah, all right, I'm checking out the girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
It would have been like if Hussain Bolt had like,
you know, pulled up and then world record and then
pulled up next time world just to keep setting world
records as opposed to running as fast as he can.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Right, So let's get to why he'll have to be
shot for treason. Wow, harsh Mondo, what shooting Olympic athletes
for failing to fulfill my patriotic you know, desires and priorities.
So this guy, you hear the name Mondo Duplantis and
you think, wow, what was odd? Republican Eastern Europe is
(07:18):
he from. He's from Louisiana. He's as American.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
As you and me.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
I'm not gonna like this.
Speaker 3 (07:25):
He competes for Sweden because his mom, I think, way
back in the day she was some sort of athlete,
and because some sort of family connection, she was allowed
to compete for Sweden.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
So he's allowed to compete for Sweden.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
And the reason he competes for Sweden, And they talked
about this on NBC before you tell the other half
of the story, Yes.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Before you tell me, because I was running this through
my mind. Usually when this happens, it's because you can't
make the American team, right, He's the opposite. He can
make any team in the world. There ain't anybody even
close to as good as him. So I'm trying to
figure out why you decide to go compete for a
lesser country.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
Well, NBC explained that because of that weird family relationship,
he was allowed to compete for Sweden, and the Swedish
team said, Hey, the fact that your dad is your
coach and your mom is your trainer is no problem.
With US, you bring your team on as they are.
But NBC because it's all feel good and I get it,
(08:22):
it's the Olympics. This is not hard hitting journalism. But
they didn't explain, well, you had to infer So the
US team said that's not cool or what the guy's
not competing for the country he was born in and
grew up in. Why not? But in smiling it and
the Swedish he's competing for Sweden. They said it was
fine that his mom and his dad and family and
(08:45):
the champions and the gold medals and wonderfulness and look
at him go. And I was sitting there as an
American thinking, well, what the American team say? They told
him to go to hell? Why would they do that?
He's the best in the world by you know, a
foot But they didn't explain that.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Wow. Yeah, so to tell Mondo, So, is it kind
of like the way people who've got, you know, a
grandfather who is Irish and you're a quarter of Irish,
you're really into Irish heritage? Is it just that his
mom is from there? Andyll?
Speaker 2 (09:17):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
He also he's a Louisiana and he's an American. He
won the gold medal for the United States. They need
to fix that.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Well, right, yeah, we get it. Is it possible? And
I don't know that track and field is way bigger
in Europe, like more of the time than it is here,
So he could make more money being because he's like
a hero in Sweden and in Europe he's a household
name there, and he knew the market's not so hot
in America.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
So I'm gonna explain this sense obscure connection and compete
for a different.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Country that actually makes sense in other countries, like track
and field or soccer or whatever sport. It's a really
really big deal in the United States. You can be
a really big deal in some sports and you're just
nobody's gonna care.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
So Mondo, when the US Coast war with China, which
side are you on? Whichever side gives you the best.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Deal or what? Hmm, I'm calling you out, son.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
I loved After he kissed his girlfriend after breaking the record,
one of his teammates was standing there.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
They just started punching the crap out of each other. Yeah,
that was weird.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
That was very I thought they were I actually thought
they were starting to fight there for a second, but
apparently it was a weird greeting.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Yeah, and yes, I can confirm that his girlfriend is
an attractive young woman.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
So see, you're watching the Olympics. You know I could
have won a medal in the Olympics. Yeah, yeah, but
my penis is too big, so I didn't ever watched
the pole vault. Oh how they squeeze over the bar.
That's what I tried to do, but I can't because
my penis is so large.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Yep, my schlog got hooked. You know how painful that
can be.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Anyway, and that's why I don't watch the Olympics.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Well, that podcast was spicy, had a bit of a
wang to it. Well, I guess that's it.
It'll be a humble brag he uses the rest of
his life. It's one more thing.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
I'm strung and geddy, one more thing.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
I mean, a guy who could have meddled in the
pole vault but knocked the bar off because his manhood
is too big. Is the sort of thing you pretend
to complain about throughout your life.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Right, menshonse is constantly getting in my way. For instance,
there was the Paris Olympics. Perhaps you saw it.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Yeah, it's kind of a drag. I mean, I'm so
big down there, and it hurt my pole vaulting career.
What my poll ruined my poll vault exactly? So anyway,
we got a couple of pole vault stories for you.
One of them uh comedy, one of them real. This
is from John Oliver's show on HBO.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
The men's one hundred meters finals were on Sunday, where
American Noah Lyles got the gold medal by five thousands
of a second. This was the closest finish in over
forty years. And I don't want to take anything away
from no Allows, but isn't this a tie?
Speaker 2 (01:02):
I mean, wouldn't we even have.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
Ties for if we're not gonna pull it out for
stuff like this. I mean, in fact, if you were
watching this with just your eyes, all these guys finished
at the same time. Really, if these guys were trains,
no one would say my train was late. Another Olympic
moment getting a lot of attention. A pole vaulter lost
when his giant shlong.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
On the crossbarm.
Speaker 4 (01:30):
But this has gotta be the best possible way to lose.
I will say, next Olympics, this guy should compete in
one hundred meters. He'd win from ten feet back.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Oh no, let's be better than that. Let's say, come.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
On, as long is an unerrated word, it's not gonna
start using it more often.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Yeah, yeah, I work with children.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
And I agree with that one hundred meters saying, you
look at it, it was a tie at five of
them more.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
At the same speed. It's a race.
Speaker 3 (01:59):
The one guy's finished before the other guy five one
thousandths of a second, mister, trophies for everyone. Was the
attitude that ruined America. What would they have done without
modern technology? If it was just eyeballs, they had to
call it a tie, wouldn't they. Well, remember a photo
finish was like film back in the day. And you
couldn't fire off that many frames.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
So yeah, I suspect they would have called it a tie,
right because it was five one thousandth of a second,
which is an unimaginable amount of time. Yeah you yeah, Well,
if the technology is accurate in assessing that that dude,
yeah he passed or he hit the plane five one
thousandths of a second before the other dude, Well then
(02:40):
I guess you use it.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
But I kind of see your point in that. You're
I mean, what if it was like one one millionth
of a second, Well, well, you're right, exactly right, or like,
you know, there's some sort of vibrating electron measuring device
that is, you know, it's one trillionth of whatever point.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
But the pole ball guy could have just flopped it
forward across the line, all right, yeah, long flop forward.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Swanstuka is my favorite from the draw.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I know somebody who regularly refers to it as a penis,
and I just find that as off putting as anything
could be.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
I don't know why the actual word what are you child? Huh?
It's uh so what do you prefer? I don't think
it's a well crafted word.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
For one thing, I would I would like a different word, well,
not different vowels, and Katy.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Asks what I prefer, and that's where I have to
uh not answer because it depends on the setting obviously.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Ah yeah, well all right, you're at your urologist's office,
I call it my penis.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
If I'm at the urologist, I suppose.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
But see, I don't like.
Speaker 3 (03:54):
I think long vowels make words tougher to take, like
vrgina is easier to take than the other.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
One, the vagina, pennis? What is easier to take than penis?
I don't know why.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
I'm curious about this, Katie. I'm gonna try to keep
this like above sophomore level, but I am curious. So like,
if you were going to go to the doctor and
you were having you who problems, would you say, I
got a X problem with my vagina?
Speaker 2 (04:27):
Is that what you would say? Yeah, probably you would.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
I guess doctor, what else are you going to say?
I don't know, and don't offer any choices.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
One rhymes with scooter, Hey, doc, something's wrong with the skater.
Speaker 3 (04:52):
Like happ a Lachian doctor or something? What was I'm
so bad at Saturday Night Live? I don't watch that much.
But Kate McKinnon, Yeah, her character that got him to
a Yeah, really unfortunate. Yeah, don't even Yeah, that's interesting if.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
You want to google it.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Now we have actual pull vulter, best poll vulter in
the world.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Buy a lot.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
I didn't know this, but like, if he enters the competition,
it's not does he win or not, it's by how much?
And he's been doing this for years and he's got
all the world records, which I can explain in just
a little bit of the shame.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
We'll have to shoot him for treason. Okay, I want
to hear that.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Mando do Plantis. Here's what it sounded like in Paris.
It was the only event going on at the very
end of the night. He'd already won the gold medal,
but he is gonna go ahead and jump is one
more time to see if he could set a gold medal,
a world world record.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
Mando de Plantis world records.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
He does on his back. He's so he's so used
to setting world records, it's not even that for him.
He just lands on his back, jumps up, runs over,
kisses his hot model girlfriend to make sure she gets
some FaceTime because they are crafty with the way they
make money. She gets some FaceTime, everybody becomes aware of
her name, which helped her and him. And he's got
in his contract that he makes fifty thousand dollars or
(06:15):
something like that every time he sets a world record,
So rather than raise the bar to what he thinks
he can jump, he raises it by the minimum amount
every single time. So that's how he's set like fifteen
world records in the last two years. Every competition he
just raises it a timey bit. So he's always setting
a world record. Who knows how high he could jump
if he went as high as he wanted, and uh,
(06:38):
you know I do know no rules against that.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Yeah, yeah, all right, I'm checking out the girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
It would have been like if Hussain Bolt had like,
you know, pulled up and then world record and then
pulled up next time world just to keep setting world
records as opposed to running as fast as he can.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Right, So let's get to why he'll have to be
shot for treason. Wow, harsh Mondo, what shooting Olympic athletes
for failing to fulfill my patriotic you know, desires and priorities.
So this guy, you hear the name Mondo Duplantis and
you think, wow, what was odd? Republican Eastern Europe is
(07:18):
he from. He's from Louisiana. He's as American.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
As you and me.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
I'm not gonna like this.
Speaker 3 (07:25):
He competes for Sweden because his mom, I think, way
back in the day she was some sort of athlete,
and because some sort of family connection, she was allowed
to compete for Sweden.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
So he's allowed to compete for Sweden.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
And the reason he competes for Sweden, And they talked
about this on NBC before you tell the other half
of the story, Yes.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Before you tell me, because I was running this through
my mind. Usually when this happens, it's because you can't
make the American team, right, He's the opposite. He can
make any team in the world. There ain't anybody even
close to as good as him. So I'm trying to
figure out why you decide to go compete for a
lesser country.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
Well, NBC explained that because of that weird family relationship,
he was allowed to compete for Sweden, and the Swedish
team said, Hey, the fact that your dad is your
coach and your mom is your trainer is no problem.
With US, you bring your team on as they are.
But NBC because it's all feel good and I get it,
(08:22):
it's the Olympics. This is not hard hitting journalism. But
they didn't explain, well, you had to infer So the
US team said that's not cool or what the guy's
not competing for the country he was born in and
grew up in. Why not? But in smiling it and
the Swedish he's competing for Sweden. They said it was
fine that his mom and his dad and family and
(08:45):
the champions and the gold medals and wonderfulness and look
at him go. And I was sitting there as an
American thinking, well, what the American team say? They told
him to go to hell? Why would they do that?
He's the best in the world by you know, a
foot But they didn't explain that.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Wow. Yeah, so to tell Mondo, So, is it kind
of like the way people who've got, you know, a
grandfather who is Irish and you're a quarter of Irish,
you're really into Irish heritage? Is it just that his
mom is from there? Andyll?
Speaker 2 (09:17):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
He also he's a Louisiana and he's an American. He
won the gold medal for the United States. They need
to fix that.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Well, right, yeah, we get it. Is it possible? And
I don't know that track and field is way bigger
in Europe, like more of the time than it is here,
So he could make more money being because he's like
a hero in Sweden and in Europe he's a household
name there, and he knew the market's not so hot
in America.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
So I'm gonna explain this sense obscure connection and compete
for a different.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Country that actually makes sense in other countries, like track
and field or soccer or whatever sport. It's a really
really big deal in the United States. You can be
a really big deal in some sports and you're just
nobody's gonna care.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
So Mondo, when the US Coast war with China, which
side are you on? Whichever side gives you the best.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Deal or what? Hmm, I'm calling you out, son.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
I loved After he kissed his girlfriend after breaking the record,
one of his teammates was standing there.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
They just started punching the crap out of each other. Yeah,
that was weird.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
That was very I thought they were I actually thought
they were starting to fight there for a second, but
apparently it was a weird greeting.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
Yeah, and yes, I can confirm that his girlfriend is
an attractive young woman.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
So see, you're watching the Olympics. You know I could
have won a medal in the Olympics. Yeah, yeah, but
my penis is too big, so I didn't ever watched
the pole vault. Oh how they squeeze over the bar.
That's what I tried to do, but I can't because
my penis is so large.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Yep, my schlog got hooked. You know how painful that
can be.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Anyway, and that's why I don't watch the Olympics.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Well, that podcast was spicy, had a bit of a
wang to it. Well, I guess that's it.
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Joe Getty
Jack Armstrong
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