March 17, 2020 • 21 mins
This is Amy’s ‘5th Thing’ (a bonus episode) where she answers your questions every Tuesday! ‘4 Things With Amy Brown’ comes out every Thursday, but on Tuesdays Amy answers questions you’ve emailed in. On today’s episode Amy addresses your questions about: her upcoming disordered eating podcast with Lisa{@thewellnecessities}, game night ideas, helping a loved one on the anniversary of a major loss and her history with birth control.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Okay, quote time. I'm so glad a lot of you
are liking the quotes that we've added to the beginning
of Tuesday's episode. I got some notes about that, and
that's just encouraging because that's what these little quotes are for,
to just inspire and encourage you. And it's something simple
we can just throw into the Tuesday episode. So I'm
(00:21):
looking forward to today's quote because it's from a person
that I really admire. And here's the quote. Imperfect can
I talk? Imperfections are not inadequacies. I'm gonna go ahead
and own that I can't really talk that well. But
that's that's just that's fine and not inadequate. Okay, Imperfections
(00:41):
are not inadequacies. They are reminders that we're all in
this together. Burnet Brown shout out. So you know, if
you mess up today, it's fine. We're all in this together. Like,
nobody is perfect, even if you think from social media
or whatever it is, it's giving you painting this picture
(01:02):
for you that somebody is perfect. It's they're They're just
not and hopefully we can I know that I'm probably
guilty of painting that sometimes because I don't want to
put up all the yucky stuff because also I don't
want to be Debbie Downer, like I don't want to
bring people down, but I also want y'all to know,
and maybe the podcast is where I do a better
place of explaining to you and sharing with you that
(01:24):
the struggle is real. Jason witnesses at my house, you
know a lot. So he's like, yes, Amy's a hot mess,
but um, you know the big question for me, I
chose to Burnet Brown quote is because I am going
to Austin. Well, I'm supposed to be as of right now,
it's not canceled, but Burnet's I got invited to this
(01:48):
podcasting and I was going to meet her because there's
only like ninety people invited. But I don't think I'm
gonna get to meet her now. But I don't know.
I'll keep y'all posted because south By Southwest was canceled
for Corona virus and she was there as part of that.
But her podcast is still separate. But a lot of
the people were coming to be there for south By,
(02:09):
so I don't know, it's a smaller group. You might
be open. I don't know, But I don't even know
that she's still doing it because even her guests, her
podcast guests were in they may not want to travel.
So anyway, my big, my big moment, Mary and I
were going to fly because my birthday is what tomorrow?
So I turned thirty nine and that was like my
big present to myself. Hey, Renee, put a bow on
(02:34):
You're my gift. But it'll happen. Oh did you see
Remember and Love? Did you watch Love? His line? Okay,
that guy? How weird was it when that guy, the
red headed one that got that got with Gianna or whatever,
he put that bow on his wrist and he was like,
I'm it was awkward. I was like, what are you doing?
(02:55):
What are you doing? Stop? Take the bow off? Take
the bow off. I'm really bad at awkward moments and
shows like that, like like I have to stand up
and walk around like I feel so uncomfortable, And that
was one of those. So as of right now, I'm
going to be in Austin, but not meeting Burnet from
a birthday, but I think I'll get to have dinner
with my best friend Andrea from high school. So I'm
(03:16):
excited about that. Shout out thirty nine and that's something
I'm thankful the older I get, the better I the
wiser I am, the more comfortable I am in my skin,
like I like aging, like I didn't. I'm ready for
my forties. And I never thought I would say that,
but probably I should probably put that in my Gratitude journal.
(03:37):
Because Gratitude Challenge is still going on the whole month
of March. It's not too late to join us. We're
still doing it every day, going strong. And it's been
really cool to see what y'all are thankful for, and
I love they all are posting it online hashtag four
Things Gratitude or tagging shop ESPOA or tagging my Instagram
radio Amy like it's yeah, it's just really really cool
to see all of you all participating. And we've been
(03:58):
giving away randomly twenty dollar gift cards to the shop
Forward like for people that post, and you don't have
to post it in our four Things Gratitude journal. You
could be posting it on just typing it in your
phone and taking a screenshot or writing it in your
own journal. And we're picking people and then just emailing
them a gift card. So that's been fun. And then
I guess before we get in the questions too, since
(04:22):
I wanted to also mentioned that we still have customized
four things zip pouches available. I got an email about that,
so I thought i'd just addressed it real quick that
someone they thought they've just missed it, because normally we
do sell out pretty quickly, but I think we've just
had so much going on people are buying other things.
We actually still have inventory of blank ones available where
(04:43):
we can put your own four things on a cute
little zipper pouch and they're great for travel or just
keeping it stocked. Things in your purse like hand sanitizer
and wet wipes because coronavirus, you can keep all of
your it could be your Corona Power Coach anti coronavirus
four Things zipper pouch UM. But I just wanted to
(05:07):
address that, Yes, the customized ones are still available. I
don't know how much longer, but they are. And then
you know, if you're on the website, Uh, we still
have awesome pimp and joy stuff up. Still will benefit
tornado relief in Tennessee probably for a while because it's
going to take a minute to rebuild um in Middle
Tennessee just from the tornado. And then what else was that? Oh?
(05:31):
Empowered Women's tease. I guess since it's still Women's Month,
we're still honoring and trying to celebrate women. And there's
the Empowered Women Empower Women tea with a little heart
in the middle. That's stuff here on My Daughter designed
and all that's up and you can go to Radio
Amy dot com to get any of that. Awesome. Yeah,
I'm gonna get into the question. Yeah, let's do it
(05:51):
all right. This first one is from Terry. Hey, Amy,
I'm listening to the podcast regarding Positive Affirmations and heard
you mentioned the series you're working on with the Well
Necessities regarding eating disorders and that it will be a
separate podcast. I subscribe follow your four Things podcasts on
I Heart Radio, but how will I find this additional podcast? Okay, Terry,
(06:12):
I do have an update on this, and I'm now
putting it back on the Four Things podcast. It was
going to be its own thing, but I had to.
It's one of those things where I had to just
make the best call for myself and what what was
going to be blessed work. Quite honestly, um, and I
hate saying that because it's not that I don't want
(06:33):
to put in the work, but we were wanting to
already we saw it, we see the potential in it,
and we know it's going to be good. So we thought, Okay,
we'll just build this out and it'll be its own thing,
and then this will be season one and then we
can start on season two. But I was already feeling
pressure for season two and season one hasn't even launched yet,
and I was also feeling pressure of having like if
(06:55):
we make it its own thing, then we've got to
get stuff in order and the sales team can start
selling for commercials. It's like a lot that's involved, the
artwork that goes into creating the graphic, and Chase is
already helping with that. We were already I just wasn't
feeling it. Oh and we had it called the Gray Area,
and that was already another podcast is called that, so
we can we can't have that name. So then now
(07:16):
we're thinking the name should be Outweigh. And then in
the tag we have something about the gray Area of
disordered eating, and just little things were just kind of
adding stress to the plate, and I was like, this
should not be stressful. This is something that's I'm doing
because I want to be helpful. To other people that
might be going through some things I went through and
(07:37):
other women are going through, and I don't want them
to feel alone. That's literally why I have the podcast
is so that we can touch on topics. And it's
not every time that we're touching on serious matters by
any means, but when we do, it's so that we
have a place to go and talk and nobody feels alone.
And that's what Lisa, who's the well Necessities on Instagram,
(08:00):
and I want this series to be about and we
have real stories from real people. Um it's that weird
to say. I mean, people are real, stories are real,
but they're they're sharing their story and it's like they've
captured it. They we just had them recorded on their
phone and then send us the audio and it's heartbreaking
(08:20):
to listen to. Um. But also I think it going
to be so comforting to a lot of people that
don't understand why they feel the way they do about food,
or why they obsess over food, or why they restrict
and then why do they binge And they're not clinically
diagnosed with, you know, anorexia or or bulimia, but they
do feel like they have to go to the gym
(08:40):
for two hours if they eat something that maybe they
shouldn't have eaten, Like why do we do this to ourselves?
Or why why aren't we comfortable in our body the
way that it is. Maybe we're built to be curve er.
I mean, I could go on and on and on,
but long story. I'm telling a long story to answer
your question. It's going to be right here at four things.
You will have to search it out. That's another thing.
(09:02):
Like I've gotten more emails like this, and that was
another stress thing is I didn't want people to try
to find it elsewhere and then where they finding the
right thing, and then honestly too for people to forget
about it, because this is this is going to be
an important It's important to me, and I want you
to hear it if you need to hear it. I've
had moms email me that have kids that are struggling,
(09:24):
like teenage kids that are struggling with um body dysmorphia
and orthorexia and which authoriesque xias. When you just are
consumed with eating healthy, like that's all. You won't eat
something if it's not quote unquote in your approved list
of foods, and that's a thing like we shouldn't be
(09:45):
trapped by that. That's you're in shackles when you're living
that way. Now again, if you do have a disease
or an illness and you need to eat it, certainly
that is a totally different story. But if you don't,
you're living at this place of fear, which I have
been there, and you're not eating out with friends because
you can't control the ingredients and you're not eating at
a friend's house because you don't know how they cooked it.
(10:06):
Like that stuff is not good for our soul. And
so I feel like it's important and I want even
maybe random people that are don't they don't even know
about the series yet if they're subscribed to my podcast,
they're going to get it and they'll hear it, and
maybe they need to hear it. So that's another reason
why we're not starting from scratch with a new podcast.
So there you go. Thank you Terry for the question,
(10:27):
and many others that have sent similar but I just
we read Terry's, so shout out good call. All right,
Megan wants to know. I'm always looking to have a
great game night with my kids and family. I was
wondering if there are any games that you and your
kids love to play together. Yes, we love reverse raids,
we love catchphrase. These are good for adults and kids.
We love Farkele, which is a dice game. And then
(10:49):
something you can do with Farkele is you give everybody
their farkele name, like you just replace an F with
the first letter of their name, make it f like
I would be Famie, you would be face, And then
you do that and then you could have a farkele
tournament with everybody's farkle names and you can get fun hats.
We used to do that with my mom and some
family friends. We would have farcle tournaments and that's just
(11:10):
a really fun memory for me. The headphone game. Mary
got this for the kids. It's called Hearing Things. And
I don't know if you've ever seen on Ellen when
she puts on those big headphones and then she has
them read the lips and they try to guess what
they're saying that the headphones are keeping them from hearing
what it actually is. It's like telephone and then the
thing but you're reading the lips, so oh yeah, it's
(11:33):
kind of but star Shira is oddly good at it,
like she can read lips really well, and I'm like, well, shoot,
this is as much fun to play with you because
it doesn't change as much. But um, that's a fun one.
And then like if you're a family and you have TikTok,
I know this isn't like an official game, but doing
family videos is actually really fun. My family did one, well,
(11:55):
we did several because my sister and her kids were
here for Thanksgiving and we spit, you know, a lot
of time making this Dolly Pardon video like nine to
five where you like put sweatpants, like sweatpants in your
arms become legs and they're dangling in the air. But
it was fun. It was a fun activity for the
kids and they kind of they get into it and
they get dressed up and they're directing, and adults can
(12:17):
do it too. And then we did a fun family
Thanksgiving one like to Welcome to Our House Welcome uh
or whatever that song is, and that was a fun one.
So I think, you know, it doesn't have to be
a board game or an official game like TikTok can
be a game where you pass it around and each
(12:37):
person is in charge of directing and producing the second
music video. Yeah, it's it's something that we've been doing,
and I like, Okay, next question, all right, this one's
from Amanda. How do you help someone close to you
on the days that are meaningful to the loved one
they lost. My father in law passed away two and
a half years ago from cancer, on his birthday, Father's Day,
(13:01):
anniversary of his death, etcetera. I know my husband is
thinking about him and missing him. I want to acknowledge that.
I know the day is meaningful and I haven't forgotten
about his father, but I also don't know. I also
don't want to be pouring salt in the wound. You know,
considering you have experienced the loss of your mom, I
thought you might have some good perspective on this. Yeah.
I think my sister and I try to be intentional
(13:22):
about honoring our mom on her birthday and whatever that
looks like for us. Uh. You know, each year it's
been a little bit different. But I don't think if
my husband were to want to bring it up and
do something, it would not I would not consider that
salt in the wound. So your heart is in the
right place. You mean well, and I think it's better
to acknowledge it than to just kind of ignore it
(13:45):
because you're scared it might be salt in the wound.
But you can cook their favorite meal. You can you know,
during that time, read one of their favorite books. Um,
write a letter like incur a chip. This is something
you can encourage him to do, is like write down
thoughts and write something and it's not going to really
go anywhere, but it could be therapeutic for writing. I've
(14:08):
been learning that with the Gratitude challenge and writing and
having Alan Ali fallon on a couple of weeks ago
in the Four Things podcast, UM, where she wants people
to be comfortable writing and we're not all writers. Um,
maybe what were some of their favorite hobbies? Like my
mom loved to play farkle, Like, honestly, this year for
her birthday, I should have a farkel tournament because and
(14:29):
she was the best scorekeeper and I should probably keep
score in honor of her. Her nickname during Farkele was
Popo because she was like the police. She would please
everybody and make sure that everybody was not you know,
everyone's on the straight and narrow and nobody was cheating
at Farkele. So that's a way that you can it
can be fun. It doesn't have to be anything sad um,
(14:51):
although it is a sad time and you can't help
but get emotional when you think, because it just reminds
you they're not there anymore. And I when I was
thinking about this, I thought of this Winnie the Pooh
quote that is, if ever a day comes where we
can't be together, keep me in your heart. I'll stay
there forever Winnie the Poop. And I feel like that
(15:11):
would be something special. You could have printed and maybe framed,
or you if you have great handwriting, it could be
special if you write it and then frame it and
give it to whoever it is in your life that
might be going through that, so they can just say
I was thinking of you, and I thought you might
like to know that, like your loved one that you've
lost is is with you in your heart as long
(15:34):
as you keep that mindset. So I don't know it
really it could be too that he might need a
break from life, like a getaway like or if for
me that would be amazing. I mean if my husband,
like on my mom's birthday or something, I was like, hey,
you want to go get a massage, I'll be like, yeah,
thank you, awesome. This is so cool, or run me
(15:56):
a hot bath, or just know whatever they like to
do to lax or unwind. Maybe do some of that too.
I hope that helps. I know it's hard. I'm sorry.
Good stuff. Okay, this one's from Sarah. Hey, Amy, I've
(16:18):
had a long journey with birth control and wanted to
know your thoughts. Can you talk about your history with
birth control medication? Were you ever on it? If so,
did it cause you to have headaches, weight gain acne.
I currently have an I U D and have scheduled
to get it out next week. Okay, um wow. No,
I've never had an eye U D. And I did
(16:39):
take birth control at the beginning of my marriage and
it was the first time in my life. And I
was also new to the Bobby Bones show, so I
was crazy. Anytime I've taken any sort of anything to help,
whether it was trying to get pregnant when I took
CLOMD or trying not to get pregnant when I took
two different forms of birth control, I can't remember which
they were. The first one I felt awful. On the
second one, I didn't feel as awful, but I felt psychotic.
(17:02):
And when you mix that with having to be on
the radio every day and you're being recorded and it
can live on iTunes and podcasts forever. It isn't a
good cocktail. This isn't a good mix. So I decided
to get off of it. And then my hand and
I haven't really needed birth control because we can't get pregnant,
so or maybe we will. Honestly, I could still. I
(17:23):
keep thinking, like, what if I turned forty and I
get pregnant, I'm going I will be like, is this
a joke? God, are you joking? And if it was
going to happen to anything, and our daughter Sashira is like, oh,
you'd have a baby, I'm like, Okay, you're gonna raise it.
You're gonna change his stiffer in the middle of the
night because I'm a little tired. I'm all, it's tired
(17:43):
right now. I'm not gonna lie. So I don't know.
I could still get pregnant, but I know that that's
so hard. I mean, everybody's bodies are so different. One
person might react to a birth control and have no acne,
their their skin might be clear. Another person might take
it and they break out. My doctor, I'm apparently on
peraman a puzzle, and my doctor wants to put me
(18:05):
on some sort of I U D that releases some
hormone that I need that will help level me out
because my mood swings are crazy town and I'm not
on anything. It's just my hormones and my my chase.
I feel bad for you sometimes because you have to
listen to me talk like this, but my cycle is
(18:25):
really often weird and like heavy or like it's been.
It's like no other in my life, Like it's all
over the place. And my doctor is like, yeah, that's
what's happening, Like you're this is what's going down you.
I'm apparently I'm early because I started experiencing the symptoms
at thirty eight, which most women do around forty, but
some women before forty, and that just happens to be me.
(18:47):
So my husband's like yeah, he literally during one of
my freak outs the other day, he said, so, when
are you going to go get that thing inserted inside
of you that's supposed to make you better, which is
the the I U D. But I don't know that
I'm gonna get it, so also no, I shouldn't. I
don't know what else like I get, I get scared
that birth. Like later thirty years, we're going to realize
(19:08):
these things we had inside of us for giving us.
I don't know cancer. I'm not trying to be scared
anybody with it, because I could be totally wrong. A
guy in college will come on right now and be like, Amy,
stop being ignorant. Don't say that. But I don't know
that's what That's a true fear of mine. So I'm
just I'm overly cautious of what I insert in my
body or what pill I take or anything. So but
(19:30):
if anybody else is perimeno puzzle and their doctor has
done an i U D with them and it has helped,
I want to hear from you. Please send me a
note four things with Amy Brown at gmail dot com
and put perimeno puzzle in all caps in the subject line,
because like, I want to know what you're doing to
combat some of the just hormone situations that are going down.
(19:53):
And then, really I wish I could help you, Sarah
with your birth control journey, but that's really you and
your doctor. You're the best advocate for yourself, and don't
be scared, ask questions, talk to your doctor, like play
around with it. Figure out it's best or um, abstain.
I feel like only come when I'm like with you
(20:18):
that week. Okay, well I guess that's going to be
a rap on today's episode. UM, thank you so much
for always sending your questions. I just appreciate you all
so much. And we'll see you Thursday for the Four
Things episode. Every Tuesday we do Q and A. Every Thursday,
we do four Things. And if you haven't subscribed and
(20:39):
rated and reviewed like that would be awesome, Like, take
some time today and subscribe for Things maybe Brown. That
way you'll get it uploaded to your phone right away
and then, um, you won't ever miss a single episode
ever ever. I mean, although I'm sure you'd be fine
if you did
Okay, quote time. I'm so glad a lot of you
are liking the quotes that we've added to the beginning
of Tuesday's episode. I got some notes about that, and
that's just encouraging because that's what these little quotes are for,
to just inspire and encourage you. And it's something simple
we can just throw into the Tuesday episode. So I'm
(00:21):
looking forward to today's quote because it's from a person
that I really admire. And here's the quote. Imperfect can
I talk? Imperfections are not inadequacies. I'm gonna go ahead
and own that I can't really talk that well. But
that's that's just that's fine and not inadequate. Okay, Imperfections
(00:41):
are not inadequacies. They are reminders that we're all in
this together. Burnet Brown shout out. So you know, if
you mess up today, it's fine. We're all in this together. Like,
nobody is perfect, even if you think from social media
or whatever it is, it's giving you painting this picture
(01:02):
for you that somebody is perfect. It's they're They're just
not and hopefully we can I know that I'm probably
guilty of painting that sometimes because I don't want to
put up all the yucky stuff because also I don't
want to be Debbie Downer, like I don't want to
bring people down, but I also want y'all to know,
and maybe the podcast is where I do a better
place of explaining to you and sharing with you that
(01:24):
the struggle is real. Jason witnesses at my house, you
know a lot. So he's like, yes, Amy's a hot mess,
but um, you know the big question for me, I
chose to Burnet Brown quote is because I am going
to Austin. Well, I'm supposed to be as of right now,
it's not canceled, but Burnet's I got invited to this
(01:48):
podcasting and I was going to meet her because there's
only like ninety people invited. But I don't think I'm
gonna get to meet her now. But I don't know.
I'll keep y'all posted because south By Southwest was canceled
for Corona virus and she was there as part of that.
But her podcast is still separate. But a lot of
the people were coming to be there for south By,
(02:09):
so I don't know, it's a smaller group. You might
be open. I don't know, But I don't even know
that she's still doing it because even her guests, her
podcast guests were in they may not want to travel.
So anyway, my big, my big moment, Mary and I
were going to fly because my birthday is what tomorrow?
So I turned thirty nine and that was like my
big present to myself. Hey, Renee, put a bow on
(02:34):
You're my gift. But it'll happen. Oh did you see
Remember and Love? Did you watch Love? His line? Okay,
that guy? How weird was it when that guy, the
red headed one that got that got with Gianna or whatever,
he put that bow on his wrist and he was like,
I'm it was awkward. I was like, what are you doing?
(02:55):
What are you doing? Stop? Take the bow off? Take
the bow off. I'm really bad at awkward moments and
shows like that, like like I have to stand up
and walk around like I feel so uncomfortable, And that
was one of those. So as of right now, I'm
going to be in Austin, but not meeting Burnet from
a birthday, but I think I'll get to have dinner
with my best friend Andrea from high school. So I'm
(03:16):
excited about that. Shout out thirty nine and that's something
I'm thankful the older I get, the better I the
wiser I am, the more comfortable I am in my skin,
like I like aging, like I didn't. I'm ready for
my forties. And I never thought I would say that,
but probably I should probably put that in my Gratitude journal.
(03:37):
Because Gratitude Challenge is still going on the whole month
of March. It's not too late to join us. We're
still doing it every day, going strong. And it's been
really cool to see what y'all are thankful for, and
I love they all are posting it online hashtag four
Things Gratitude or tagging shop ESPOA or tagging my Instagram
radio Amy like it's yeah, it's just really really cool
to see all of you all participating. And we've been
(03:58):
giving away randomly twenty dollar gift cards to the shop
Forward like for people that post, and you don't have
to post it in our four Things Gratitude journal. You
could be posting it on just typing it in your
phone and taking a screenshot or writing it in your
own journal. And we're picking people and then just emailing
them a gift card. So that's been fun. And then
I guess before we get in the questions too, since
(04:22):
I wanted to also mentioned that we still have customized
four things zip pouches available. I got an email about that,
so I thought i'd just addressed it real quick that
someone they thought they've just missed it, because normally we
do sell out pretty quickly, but I think we've just
had so much going on people are buying other things.
We actually still have inventory of blank ones available where
(04:43):
we can put your own four things on a cute
little zipper pouch and they're great for travel or just
keeping it stocked. Things in your purse like hand sanitizer
and wet wipes because coronavirus, you can keep all of
your it could be your Corona Power Coach anti coronavirus
four Things zipper pouch UM. But I just wanted to
(05:07):
address that, Yes, the customized ones are still available. I
don't know how much longer, but they are. And then
you know, if you're on the website, Uh, we still
have awesome pimp and joy stuff up. Still will benefit
tornado relief in Tennessee probably for a while because it's
going to take a minute to rebuild um in Middle
Tennessee just from the tornado. And then what else was that? Oh?
(05:31):
Empowered Women's tease. I guess since it's still Women's Month,
we're still honoring and trying to celebrate women. And there's
the Empowered Women Empower Women tea with a little heart
in the middle. That's stuff here on My Daughter designed
and all that's up and you can go to Radio
Amy dot com to get any of that. Awesome. Yeah,
I'm gonna get into the question. Yeah, let's do it
(05:51):
all right. This first one is from Terry. Hey, Amy,
I'm listening to the podcast regarding Positive Affirmations and heard
you mentioned the series you're working on with the Well
Necessities regarding eating disorders and that it will be a
separate podcast. I subscribe follow your four Things podcasts on
I Heart Radio, but how will I find this additional podcast? Okay, Terry,
(06:12):
I do have an update on this, and I'm now
putting it back on the Four Things podcast. It was
going to be its own thing, but I had to.
It's one of those things where I had to just
make the best call for myself and what what was
going to be blessed work. Quite honestly, um, and I
hate saying that because it's not that I don't want
(06:33):
to put in the work, but we were wanting to
already we saw it, we see the potential in it,
and we know it's going to be good. So we thought, Okay,
we'll just build this out and it'll be its own thing,
and then this will be season one and then we
can start on season two. But I was already feeling
pressure for season two and season one hasn't even launched yet,
and I was also feeling pressure of having like if
(06:55):
we make it its own thing, then we've got to
get stuff in order and the sales team can start
selling for commercials. It's like a lot that's involved, the
artwork that goes into creating the graphic, and Chase is
already helping with that. We were already I just wasn't
feeling it. Oh and we had it called the Gray Area,
and that was already another podcast is called that, so
we can we can't have that name. So then now
(07:16):
we're thinking the name should be Outweigh. And then in
the tag we have something about the gray Area of
disordered eating, and just little things were just kind of
adding stress to the plate, and I was like, this
should not be stressful. This is something that's I'm doing
because I want to be helpful. To other people that
might be going through some things I went through and
(07:37):
other women are going through, and I don't want them
to feel alone. That's literally why I have the podcast
is so that we can touch on topics. And it's
not every time that we're touching on serious matters by
any means, but when we do, it's so that we
have a place to go and talk and nobody feels alone.
And that's what Lisa, who's the well Necessities on Instagram,
(08:00):
and I want this series to be about and we
have real stories from real people. Um it's that weird
to say. I mean, people are real, stories are real,
but they're they're sharing their story and it's like they've
captured it. They we just had them recorded on their
phone and then send us the audio and it's heartbreaking
(08:20):
to listen to. Um. But also I think it going
to be so comforting to a lot of people that
don't understand why they feel the way they do about food,
or why they obsess over food, or why they restrict
and then why do they binge And they're not clinically
diagnosed with, you know, anorexia or or bulimia, but they
do feel like they have to go to the gym
(08:40):
for two hours if they eat something that maybe they
shouldn't have eaten, Like why do we do this to ourselves?
Or why why aren't we comfortable in our body the
way that it is. Maybe we're built to be curve er.
I mean, I could go on and on and on,
but long story. I'm telling a long story to answer
your question. It's going to be right here at four things.
You will have to search it out. That's another thing.
(09:02):
Like I've gotten more emails like this, and that was
another stress thing is I didn't want people to try
to find it elsewhere and then where they finding the
right thing, and then honestly too for people to forget
about it, because this is this is going to be
an important It's important to me, and I want you
to hear it if you need to hear it. I've
had moms email me that have kids that are struggling,
(09:24):
like teenage kids that are struggling with um body dysmorphia
and orthorexia and which authoriesque xias. When you just are
consumed with eating healthy, like that's all. You won't eat
something if it's not quote unquote in your approved list
of foods, and that's a thing like we shouldn't be
(09:45):
trapped by that. That's you're in shackles when you're living
that way. Now again, if you do have a disease
or an illness and you need to eat it, certainly
that is a totally different story. But if you don't,
you're living at this place of fear, which I have
been there, and you're not eating out with friends because
you can't control the ingredients and you're not eating at
a friend's house because you don't know how they cooked it.
(10:06):
Like that stuff is not good for our soul. And
so I feel like it's important and I want even
maybe random people that are don't they don't even know
about the series yet if they're subscribed to my podcast,
they're going to get it and they'll hear it, and
maybe they need to hear it. So that's another reason
why we're not starting from scratch with a new podcast.
So there you go. Thank you Terry for the question,
(10:27):
and many others that have sent similar but I just
we read Terry's, so shout out good call. All right,
Megan wants to know. I'm always looking to have a
great game night with my kids and family. I was
wondering if there are any games that you and your
kids love to play together. Yes, we love reverse raids,
we love catchphrase. These are good for adults and kids.
We love Farkele, which is a dice game. And then
(10:49):
something you can do with Farkele is you give everybody
their farkele name, like you just replace an F with
the first letter of their name, make it f like
I would be Famie, you would be face, And then
you do that and then you could have a farkele
tournament with everybody's farkle names and you can get fun hats.
We used to do that with my mom and some
family friends. We would have farcle tournaments and that's just
(11:10):
a really fun memory for me. The headphone game. Mary
got this for the kids. It's called Hearing Things. And
I don't know if you've ever seen on Ellen when
she puts on those big headphones and then she has
them read the lips and they try to guess what
they're saying that the headphones are keeping them from hearing
what it actually is. It's like telephone and then the
thing but you're reading the lips, so oh yeah, it's
(11:33):
kind of but star Shira is oddly good at it,
like she can read lips really well, and I'm like, well, shoot,
this is as much fun to play with you because
it doesn't change as much. But um, that's a fun one.
And then like if you're a family and you have TikTok,
I know this isn't like an official game, but doing
family videos is actually really fun. My family did one, well,
(11:55):
we did several because my sister and her kids were
here for Thanksgiving and we spit, you know, a lot
of time making this Dolly Pardon video like nine to
five where you like put sweatpants, like sweatpants in your
arms become legs and they're dangling in the air. But
it was fun. It was a fun activity for the
kids and they kind of they get into it and
they get dressed up and they're directing, and adults can
(12:17):
do it too. And then we did a fun family
Thanksgiving one like to Welcome to Our House Welcome uh
or whatever that song is, and that was a fun one.
So I think, you know, it doesn't have to be
a board game or an official game like TikTok can
be a game where you pass it around and each
(12:37):
person is in charge of directing and producing the second
music video. Yeah, it's it's something that we've been doing,
and I like, Okay, next question, all right, this one's
from Amanda. How do you help someone close to you
on the days that are meaningful to the loved one
they lost. My father in law passed away two and
a half years ago from cancer, on his birthday, Father's Day,
(13:01):
anniversary of his death, etcetera. I know my husband is
thinking about him and missing him. I want to acknowledge that.
I know the day is meaningful and I haven't forgotten
about his father, but I also don't know. I also
don't want to be pouring salt in the wound. You know,
considering you have experienced the loss of your mom, I
thought you might have some good perspective on this. Yeah.
I think my sister and I try to be intentional
(13:22):
about honoring our mom on her birthday and whatever that
looks like for us. Uh. You know, each year it's
been a little bit different. But I don't think if
my husband were to want to bring it up and
do something, it would not I would not consider that
salt in the wound. So your heart is in the
right place. You mean well, and I think it's better
to acknowledge it than to just kind of ignore it
(13:45):
because you're scared it might be salt in the wound.
But you can cook their favorite meal. You can you know,
during that time, read one of their favorite books. Um,
write a letter like incur a chip. This is something
you can encourage him to do, is like write down
thoughts and write something and it's not going to really
go anywhere, but it could be therapeutic for writing. I've
(14:08):
been learning that with the Gratitude challenge and writing and
having Alan Ali fallon on a couple of weeks ago
in the Four Things podcast, UM, where she wants people
to be comfortable writing and we're not all writers. Um,
maybe what were some of their favorite hobbies? Like my
mom loved to play farkle, Like, honestly, this year for
her birthday, I should have a farkel tournament because and
(14:29):
she was the best scorekeeper and I should probably keep
score in honor of her. Her nickname during Farkele was
Popo because she was like the police. She would please
everybody and make sure that everybody was not you know,
everyone's on the straight and narrow and nobody was cheating
at Farkele. So that's a way that you can it
can be fun. It doesn't have to be anything sad um,
(14:51):
although it is a sad time and you can't help
but get emotional when you think, because it just reminds
you they're not there anymore. And I when I was
thinking about this, I thought of this Winnie the Pooh
quote that is, if ever a day comes where we
can't be together, keep me in your heart. I'll stay
there forever Winnie the Poop. And I feel like that
(15:11):
would be something special. You could have printed and maybe framed,
or you if you have great handwriting, it could be
special if you write it and then frame it and
give it to whoever it is in your life that
might be going through that, so they can just say
I was thinking of you, and I thought you might
like to know that, like your loved one that you've
lost is is with you in your heart as long
(15:34):
as you keep that mindset. So I don't know it
really it could be too that he might need a
break from life, like a getaway like or if for
me that would be amazing. I mean if my husband,
like on my mom's birthday or something, I was like, hey,
you want to go get a massage, I'll be like, yeah,
thank you, awesome. This is so cool, or run me
(15:56):
a hot bath, or just know whatever they like to
do to lax or unwind. Maybe do some of that too.
I hope that helps. I know it's hard. I'm sorry.
Good stuff. Okay, this one's from Sarah. Hey, Amy, I've
(16:18):
had a long journey with birth control and wanted to
know your thoughts. Can you talk about your history with
birth control medication? Were you ever on it? If so,
did it cause you to have headaches, weight gain acne.
I currently have an I U D and have scheduled
to get it out next week. Okay, um wow. No,
I've never had an eye U D. And I did
(16:39):
take birth control at the beginning of my marriage and
it was the first time in my life. And I
was also new to the Bobby Bones show, so I
was crazy. Anytime I've taken any sort of anything to help,
whether it was trying to get pregnant when I took
CLOMD or trying not to get pregnant when I took
two different forms of birth control, I can't remember which
they were. The first one I felt awful. On the
second one, I didn't feel as awful, but I felt psychotic.
(17:02):
And when you mix that with having to be on
the radio every day and you're being recorded and it
can live on iTunes and podcasts forever. It isn't a
good cocktail. This isn't a good mix. So I decided
to get off of it. And then my hand and
I haven't really needed birth control because we can't get pregnant,
so or maybe we will. Honestly, I could still. I
(17:23):
keep thinking, like, what if I turned forty and I
get pregnant, I'm going I will be like, is this
a joke? God, are you joking? And if it was
going to happen to anything, and our daughter Sashira is like, oh,
you'd have a baby, I'm like, Okay, you're gonna raise it.
You're gonna change his stiffer in the middle of the
night because I'm a little tired. I'm all, it's tired
(17:43):
right now. I'm not gonna lie. So I don't know.
I could still get pregnant, but I know that that's
so hard. I mean, everybody's bodies are so different. One
person might react to a birth control and have no acne,
their their skin might be clear. Another person might take
it and they break out. My doctor, I'm apparently on
peraman a puzzle, and my doctor wants to put me
(18:05):
on some sort of I U D that releases some
hormone that I need that will help level me out
because my mood swings are crazy town and I'm not
on anything. It's just my hormones and my my chase.
I feel bad for you sometimes because you have to
listen to me talk like this, but my cycle is
(18:25):
really often weird and like heavy or like it's been.
It's like no other in my life, Like it's all
over the place. And my doctor is like, yeah, that's
what's happening, Like you're this is what's going down you.
I'm apparently I'm early because I started experiencing the symptoms
at thirty eight, which most women do around forty, but
some women before forty, and that just happens to be me.
(18:47):
So my husband's like yeah, he literally during one of
my freak outs the other day, he said, so, when
are you going to go get that thing inserted inside
of you that's supposed to make you better, which is
the the I U D. But I don't know that
I'm gonna get it, so also no, I shouldn't. I
don't know what else like I get, I get scared
that birth. Like later thirty years, we're going to realize
(19:08):
these things we had inside of us for giving us.
I don't know cancer. I'm not trying to be scared
anybody with it, because I could be totally wrong. A
guy in college will come on right now and be like, Amy,
stop being ignorant. Don't say that. But I don't know
that's what That's a true fear of mine. So I'm
just I'm overly cautious of what I insert in my
body or what pill I take or anything. So but
(19:30):
if anybody else is perimeno puzzle and their doctor has
done an i U D with them and it has helped,
I want to hear from you. Please send me a
note four things with Amy Brown at gmail dot com
and put perimeno puzzle in all caps in the subject line,
because like, I want to know what you're doing to
combat some of the just hormone situations that are going down.
(19:53):
And then, really I wish I could help you, Sarah
with your birth control journey, but that's really you and
your doctor. You're the best advocate for yourself, and don't
be scared, ask questions, talk to your doctor, like play
around with it. Figure out it's best or um, abstain.
I feel like only come when I'm like with you
(20:18):
that week. Okay, well I guess that's going to be
a rap on today's episode. UM, thank you so much
for always sending your questions. I just appreciate you all
so much. And we'll see you Thursday for the Four
Things episode. Every Tuesday we do Q and A. Every Thursday,
we do four Things. And if you haven't subscribed and
(20:39):
rated and reviewed like that would be awesome, Like, take
some time today and subscribe for Things maybe Brown. That
way you'll get it uploaded to your phone right away
and then, um, you won't ever miss a single episode
ever ever. I mean, although I'm sure you'd be fine
if you did
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