Becky Powell: Faith. Family & Friends. Country Music. For King & Country.

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Okay, little food for you. So life, Oh it's pretty bad.
It's pretty beautiful thing that for a little moth kicking

(00:30):
with four Happy Thursday. Today's four things a little bit different.
Sometimes I have four things with just one person. Sometimes
I have four totally different things. I'm just kind of
talking or different people mixed in. And today I do
three things with one person, Becky Pale. We'll talk about
her in a second. And then the fourth thing with

(00:50):
a Christian group for King and Country. They're from Australia.
They're super awesome. They recently did a song with Dolly
Parton and I loved our little chat and I recorded
with them a couple of weeks ago, and I just
kind of like, okay, what am I going to put
with their episode? And you know, they're about putting out
inspiring music, faith based like um. Their music is very

(01:10):
powerful and touching, and of course their song with Dolly
is super amazing. And then my friend, a family friend
of mine of mine, hit me up about this book
that's going to be coming out in December, December three
to be specific. It's called Awful Beautiful Life, and uh,
he sent me a copy of her book that that
isn't out yet, but her name is Becky Pale. She

(01:32):
wrote it, and uh, she shares a story of how
God showed up in the midst of tragedy, but also
um in that she talks about how music was very
therapeutic for her during this time of tragedy, and country
music in particular, And I thought, wow, okay, well maybe
she should be the first three things. And this is

(01:54):
a great way to kind of have an episode that
has to do with faith in music, especially given for
King and country that's what they do um on a
daily basis. And then stuff that like what they do
and what artists do and songwriters do impact people like
Becky who face unthinkable things. UM. I'll just give you

(02:14):
a little bit of the story as we lead into
my little chat with Becky, and she was so sweet
and so kind, but this isn't what she ever thought
she was going to be doing with her life. And
she was a little bit nervous because she's not a
public speaker and she's she didn't grow up thinking Okay,
I'm gonna be an author. She went through something really
terrible and has decided to put her experience to paper

(02:37):
and share with others who might be going through a
really tough time because now she has a little bit
of a roadmap of how she navigated through, uh, the
tragedy that struck her family, and maybe that can help others.
And what we like to do on this podcast all
the time, I tell you is I never want anybody
to feel like they're alone, and I feel like Becky's

(02:57):
words will be there for somebody, and uh, you know,
pretty much she got a call one day from her husband, Mark,
who said, I've done something terrible and then withinn hour,
she learned that he had taken his own life and
over a period of several years and millions of dollars
in debt from friends and family that you know, her

(03:18):
husband had. I don't want I don't know, you need
to read the book, and she's going to talk about
a little bit, so I don't want to give you
too much because I wanted to be like repetitive, and
then also I want you to actually want to read it.
But um, he left her with like twenty one and
a half million dollars worth of debt and she had
no idea. But obviously that debt is what led to

(03:40):
him and other things like just in his life but
led him to him taking his own life. UH. And
it's just it's crazy what she had to go through
and endure, especially staying strong for her family and her kids,
but also being like, what what the heck? Who was
I married to? Why did I not know any of this? UM,

(04:00):
but also grieving the loss of the man that she
loved and the sadness of that, like not knowing that
he was going through all of that and they didn't
share that together and she had to find out in
such a such a crazy, unthinkable way. So that happened
back in two thousand and thirteen, and now she is,

(04:21):
you know, coming through the other side of it. It's
something that's always gonna be part of her her story
and she'll never fully get over. But I think UM
writing this story and sharing it with others is is
good for her. And UM has been therapeutic first, so
we'll talk about that. And again, it's called Awful Beautiful Life.
It's available for pre order UM, so know that when

(04:42):
you're listening to her talk, if you feel like it's
something you want to go book or something you want
to go get the book, you can order it on
Amazon and I've added it to UM my book page.
Like I have a little Amazon Amazon Shop. I can't
talk today, guys. Amazon Shop Radio Amy dot com is
where you can access that, and then got different categories.
It's like beauty groceries, and then there's a category category

(05:05):
for books and that's where you'll find it. So, um,
that's the intro. I hope everyone is just having a great,
wonderful week. I know for me, it's just been one
of those weeks where it's just been crazy and I've
been a little bit emotional and all over the place.
But it's okay. I had a I had a crying moment.
As I record this right now, I had a breakdown

(05:27):
today where I cried hard and I hadn't done that
in a while. And I know on the podcast too,
we've talked about how crying is actually really good for you,
and I was reminded of that today that I needed
to cry. And there's other days where I probably needed
to cry, but I couldn't make myself cry for whatever reason.
But today something happened that just or maybe a couple

(05:47):
of things that just gave me finally that release that
I needed. So this is just my encouragement to you
that if you need that release, then allow yourself to
feel that and get it out because I do believe
that it does your body good and it releases chemicals
that make you feel better. So you know, cry, That's

(06:13):
That's that's my advice to you today. I'm just gonna
leave you with that a little bit bit and know
that if you cry, you're not alone and we're all
going through something. So again that leads me to another
reminder to just have grace for people and know that
if they treat you a certain way that isn't kind,
it just means they're probably going through something and we

(06:35):
just gotta always always remember that. Um okay, So here
we go. First, three things with Becky Powe all about
her book Awful Beautiful Life, and then the fourth thing
with to Australian awesome dudes from four King and Country.
Here we go first. So, as I mentioned in the intro,

(06:59):
I've got Becky Pale here and it's kind of interesting
how we came together because I'm from Austin, born and raised.
You live in Austin. But we have a mutual friend
shout out, well, a couple of different ones, but specifically
Matt Matthias, which I used to when I was in
high school. Um, they had three kids to two girls

(07:21):
that were twins and like a three year old at
the time, and I was a senior in high school,
and I would go and spend about four hours a
day helping them out, so kind of like they're little
part time nanny, and then I would go back for
cheerleading practice in between, because my school hours were weird
my senior year. And they're just like the best family ever.
And I got a package in the mail from Matt

(07:41):
and it included your book, Awful Beautiful Life, and then
a sweet note from Matt and a sweet note from you.
And you know, it took me a couple of weeks
to get to it, and then I finally started reading it,
and then I reached out to Matt and then reached
out to you. And crazy part is You're like, well,
I'm going to be in Nashville next week. And it's like, well,

(08:01):
that's amazing. Can you please come on my podcast? So Becky,
a'lllett uh you kind of take it from here with
We're gonna start with faith. We're gonna do three things
um with Becky today and Awful Beautiful Life is the
title of your book. And UM, faith is a huge
part of your journey and what you write about, and

(08:25):
I know that it's a very sensitive, vulnerable thing. Uh.
And then after faith, you've got some efforts that you use.
So let's start with faith, and then we'll get into
family and friends and then country music too, because that
played UM has played a role in what you experience.

(08:45):
So I'm gonna let you tell listeners about what take
us back to where this started, um, and why this
book now exists. The book exists, it's this is our
story from about six and a half years ago. My

(09:08):
just living an ordinary life, every day busy and I
guess ordinary day. In the middle of one day, my
has been called and said he had done something terrible,
and within two hours I found out he had taken
his life, and my life changed instantly. I was instantly

(09:36):
a widow, single mom of three. And the book Awful
Beautiful Life is our journey through what happened from that
day forward. And I could not have gotten through what
we encountered for the next eighteen months without my faith.
A lot of people ask me how did you, how

(09:56):
did you do it? And my responses lots of efforts, faith, family, friends,
fun and a few of those other efforts too, sometimes
the other efforts right exactly, which I mean I think
everybody would understand. And you know, as I was reading
I and even just now hearing you say that, I'm

(10:16):
sure it's hard for you to even go back to
that day, even having to relive it when you're writing
the book, um, but also probably therapeutic for you to
um to go back and sort through some of that
through writing the book. It's been very therapy, and I
think for my children as well, just kind of going

(10:38):
back and realizing what we really lived through. I think
some of it at the time was just such a blur.
But then also just saying how God did show up
in these unexpected ways at unexpected times that just pushed through,
helped us push through. So your faith at at the
time and then your faith, you know, there's there's two

(11:03):
Becky pals, I think, and that's that before that phone
call and then the two hours after that phone call.
I mean, that's got to be a drastic Your life
is never the same. So where was your faith in
that time? And then once she realized, you know, where
was your faith two hours later? So my faith has

(11:25):
always been pretty strong, but I didn't know. I mean,
I thought it was pretty strong, but obviously it got stronger.
I think it came to the point where I just
was completely dependent on God. It was more of a
quiet time with God, a time where God really carried me.

(11:46):
It was a more private God time because there were
specific moments in this journey where He was very clear
speaking to me that I had never had in my
faith journey before. There were times when he was saying,
I am here, and I think my The time it
was most clear for me was a couple of months

(12:07):
after Mark had taken his life. There were some circumstances
that we owed people twenty one and a half million
dollars that I didn't know we owed, which led to
an FBI SEC and Department of Justice investigation, and so
we couldn't touch anything in the house until they came

(12:28):
through and did the search of our house. Once they
finished with that, I started going through all of our
boxes because we were going to sell the house and move.
And as I'm going through my childhood boxes and Mark's
childhood boxes, I came across these and Mark's box a

(12:49):
decapase Jesus. He grew up Baptists, and you have the
little wooden plaque where you put the picture of Jesus
on there and then you shall like it. And he
had this beautiful, serene Jesus in his box that he
had saved, and then a couple of bucks. Is later
I come to mine same thing. I Grant Methodist did

(13:09):
the little deck apology Jesus on the wooden plaque, except
mine was the picture of Jesus in the temple turning
over the money changers. I mean, what child picks the
angry Jesus. But it was that moment that I realized
God was telling me this money. Don't don't worry about
the money. We're not You're not keeping this money. I'm

(13:33):
here and I prepared you for this when you were
a little girl, when you were Becky Lee, I prepared
you for this exact moment. So my faith became this, Okay,
I'm totally dependent on God, and it is me and
God that Josh Turner song Me and God. That's that
that reson totally. So just to clarify, because um and awful,

(13:57):
beautiful Life is the book and we're just touching on
different parts of it. So without reading it, you might
be confused to hear you say you're not going to
keep any of the money, but there was twenty one
and a half million dollars worth of debt, but there
was insurance money, and that's the money you're talking about
not keeping, because Mark wanted that for you and the kids,
because he knew he he was just in a dark

(14:20):
place and he thought the solution was he needed to leave.
That was his solution. But he didn't want to leave
you with nothing and all this debt. So if he
had the insurance um money for you, he wanted you
to keep it. And I think something that just hit
me so hard was in the book you said, you know,

(14:44):
it's one thing to learn that because you you knew
nothing about this debt, and y'all lived a very um
beyond comfortable lifestyle. It was very like y'all didn't want
for any thing, and you traveled and you had nice things,
and you threw big parties and you were with you

(15:05):
had parties with the governor and more common people like
my who knew my sister went to your Christmas parties.
I didn't learn that until after I was reading your book,
but you know, she I think met y'all through young
life work that you did, or her husband did, and
then he did y'all's pool, And so you had a
mix of people, not just you know, um Austin socialites,

(15:27):
but like a lot of that and your life anybody
from outside looking in would never know, including yourself, what
was really happening. Like you were completely caught off guard.
So anyway for you to then learn this about your
husband for to not know, oh my gosh, who have
I been married to? But then you said, and then

(15:49):
he wants me to keep this money? So who does
he think I am? I mean what so I got
I got goose bumps when I heard that. It's almost
like you just it probably was a double like whammy
for you because you could not keep the money, knowing
that you owed or your husband owed all of these

(16:12):
people this money, um, and you were determined to pay
it back. And but but more than just needing God
to probably guide you through that and your faith to
help you through that process, it was just you were
still grieving the loss of your husband and your children's father,
and then on top of that, you know, the FBI
looking into you, and so yeah, so I know there

(16:35):
was lots of quiet times involved, and um, not only
the country music, which we'll get into that. You mentioned
the Josh Turner song that that will be the third
thing we talked about. But you know, just certain verses
that you clung to, and um, so what what how
would you say? Because I know this is too I'm

(16:56):
not trying to get away the WHO book, as I
do want people to read it. But you know, I
love where you made a decision, um to not let
alcohol carry you through this, because there was a time where,
like with in the Mark was still alive, but towards
that the end of his time, like the last I
don't know how long. I don't know if you even say,

(17:17):
but let's just say the last few months or so,
you thought you had been having more wine at night
and Peop would always stop by and sometimes to be
three glasses and you just and then when he died.
I mean I would think an obvious thing would be like, well,
I you know, when my mom passed away, I relied
heavily on wine, and I've been vocal about that, um
too much like but and even xan X because I

(17:39):
could not deal. And but I mean I also didn't
have children at the time who were suffering, and I
needed to like be there for them, like my husband
would deploy and like that's how it's the only way
I could get to sleep at night. Um. But I
also did rely on my faith. But for you, you
had to be like a soldier because you had lots
to do. And um, you decided it's not going to

(18:01):
be with alcohol. It's going to be with my faith. Right,
and again I believe that God gave me an instant
to make that decision. There were some children up in
my son's bedroom the night after Mark had died, and
they were drinking and some of them were under age,

(18:23):
and it just hit me. It just hit me like that, no,
we're not going to do this. There's also Mark had
addiction issues, and I didn't want that to be the answer,
the solution for my children. And so if I was
going to say this is not how we're going to
do it, I had to be the example. I had
to stop and show my children, you know, this is

(18:44):
going to be really hard and we're not going to
hide from it. We're going to talk about it, but
we will not let alcohol be the solution. And then, um,
I just also I have pictures. You know, when you're
reading a book and you have images like I just
picked your you. There was times where you mentioned like
you would just be on the couch having to deal
with real issues, but you would just sit there with

(19:06):
your Bible in your lap. Right. I clung to the
psalms just because they were simple. I couldn't process a
whole lot, but they give you such strength and hope
and encouragement, and it tells you to seek refuge in Him.
To be honest, Um, he will provide. I mean, it

(19:29):
has every aspect of what we were dealing with. And
so I just kept reading them over and over and
over again, and I think, um, you know you mentioned too,
and I uh, I found this to be interesting because
I think as adults we probably over complicate things and
think that maybe we shouldn't. Weren't you reading like a
kid's version of About? And I thought, this is genius.

(19:52):
I need to do this because what share share with
our listeners, because I think that some of my listeners
will be like, thank you for Becky Powell telling me
that this is okay, Amy. I mean, it's that childlike faith.
And it just so happened again to me this was
God providing. I was reading at the time Mark died
Jesus Calling for children, so yes was perfect, which a

(20:16):
devotional devotional or just like Jesus Calling is an adult
devotional that was so popular they turned it into a
children's devotional and I got it because I was giving
it to a child, and I bought myself a copy.
And it's simple. I mean, it's the same principles, but

(20:36):
it just to say, thumbs it down, but it just
makes it simple. It makes it easier to process. And
it's what I needed. I mean, I could only I
had so many other things going on. I couldn't concentrate.
But it was short and simple enough and it applied.
Yeah no, And I think that that's something especially when

(20:59):
you're grieving or you're having to juggle a lot and
you need something to speak to you, but not to
just your brain. You only have so much capacity, right,
So I thought that was the helpful thing that you
could pass along to the others listening. That's an encouragement
that it's okay and it can it's it's it's not overcomplicated.

(21:19):
I had enough complicated things going to do it. That
was and when you know, yeah, you're trying to keep
it simple, but and you know it's not like God
cares like, oh, well, sorry, you're right, I can't carry
through this because you're using the kid edition. Um, and
so did you like when my Uh, something I remember
about my mom and her faith is after my dad left.

(21:43):
He left when I was like nine years old and
married somebody else, and you know, I know, my mom
never so that's that's a that was a double thing
for her. I have my mom when my parents were together,
and then I have the version of my mom without
my dad, and I I saw a change, and I

(22:05):
knew it's almost like it's my mom with my dad
and then after my dad. But also to me, it's
like my mom without Jesus and then with Jesus. And so, um,
do you think your kids she saw some of that
because my mom would pray every morning. I don't think
I ever really remembered seeing her praying, but she would
be in her closet on her knees. Um. She never

(22:27):
spoke ill of my dad, and she could have, but
she was trying to cling to her faith and do
the right thing and not you know, cause more damage
by she could have said all the bad things in
the world, because I'm sure, I mean, she's human she's
probably thinking them, um, but she chose to just not
put that in our minds. But because I think she
was filling herself with the Holy Spirit and that that

(22:50):
gave her the strength to not go there. And then um, yeah,
I saw her just change and cling to her uh
the word and have girlfriends over in the morning for
Bible study. I mean they would be over at five am,
like having coffee. And so I just didn't know. I see.
I say that because others out there could be listening

(23:11):
and just going through something and knowing that it's it's
okay to make us. Sometimes people are scared like can
I make that switch? Do I need that? And then
when you're in a desperate time, you just do it,
and then that becomes your normal because that's now who
I remember my mom as. Right, That's a good question.
I would have to ask my kids if they saw

(23:33):
a change, because I mean we went you know, we
went to church almost every Sunday. I think what they
saw was me maybe being more steadfast and more vocal
about it than a change really in what we believed. Right, Yeah,
And I think that too, And I'm not I wasn't
trying to put you on the spot with that question.

(23:54):
But I just feel like with faith playing such a
big role, and sometimes um, it's you know, you hate
for horrible things to happen, but then when you come
out on the other side of as long as it,
you know, God can use certain things for good if
we allow it. And he says that right, and I

(24:15):
wanted them to. I think one thing that changed that
not the very heat died on a Thursday night and
we didn't go to church that very next Sunday, but
the following Sunday, that's where I wanted to go. I
wanted to go. So I wanted the kids to see, Okay,
this is what we believe, and now it's time to

(24:36):
kind of put our money where our mouth is. I mean,
we say that we're going to turn to Him in trouble.
So we got up, we went to church. The sermon
that day, I mean it was for us, there's no doubt.
It was a visiting pastor and he was talking about
the um race, like I don't know if it was

(24:57):
a three mile Yeah, it was a three mile race,
and he talks about the first mile is really easy,
you're just all excited and pumped up, and that last
mile kind of you're exhausted, but you know the end
is coming, but that second mile is super hard. And
he was saying that he actually saw someone get off

(25:20):
the track in that second mile and just gave up
because it was so hard, and he was saying, you've
got to stay stay on in that hard time in
the second mile and seek God. And it was just,
oh my gosh, we're about to hit that second mile.
So again I think it our faith was there, but

(25:44):
the resolve, the steadfast We're going to do what we
believe and cling to that. Yeah. No, Um, that's good,
and I think, uh, making that decision is one of
the things you decided. You also decided that you were
going to get up and shower every day and put
your makeup on. And that's something I think too that

(26:06):
other people could hear and be like my friend and
I were talking about that. We're like, okay, because I
think it would be so easy. Gosh if I was
you just being honest like I, I don't know that
I could get out of bed at all. Um. I
really admire your strength and tenacity through this because it's wow, Yeah,

(26:26):
it's strength from another place. And I say that I
don't know that I could get through it. But I
guess it depends when push came to shove. What am
I going to cling to? And you made that decision
um for it to be your faith, but you also
made practical decisions that you knew that we're going to
get you through the day, like get up, shower, put
your makeup on, show face right. And actually I was
pretty proud of myself for making some of those decisions.

(26:48):
And then one day I was sitting there because I'm like, okay, Lord,
give me wisdom and discernment. And then I realized, oh
my gosh, all those ideas came from God. It wasn't me.
But that the getting up and showering every day and
putting my makeup on was part of that was just
being Okay, I'm gonna do what I usually did. I

(27:09):
need some normalcy. I need to get up. If I don't,
I'll stay in bed. If I don't get up and
have this steadfast, I'm going to shower, I'm going to
put up my makeup. There was one day, really twice
I had to start my makeup over again because I
had already cried it off. So even if I cried
it off within an hour or by the end of
the day. I wanted to try to keep something normal,

(27:32):
some type of normalcy, get up, show the kids were
going to move forward even if it's hard. I don't know. Yeah, no, um,
well I think we got I like where this went
with the faith talk. And next let's get into two
of the other f words, um, family and friends. Okay,

(28:00):
so obviously when we face hard times, like certain people
show up and for you. And in the book when
I read and you know, I mentioned uh Matt Mathias,
he showed up for you in a in a different way,
And I don't really know honestly, and you can share
with me how what your relationship was like with him
before um it all happened. But obviously he knew your

(28:23):
husband and had been one of the people that loaned
him some money, and you know you had probably I
just I can't even imagine what it must be like
for you because some of these friends and family that
were showing up for you were also people that loaned
your husband money. So then it's you know, it's it's
like I don't even know that I have the words

(28:44):
because I just can't even imagine. But then also I
want you to uh speak into listeners or people that are, um,
you know, listening to this right now that my know
somebody that is going through something um tragic. I mean
not this exact scenario, but a lot of times you
want to know, as a friend, how can I be

(29:04):
there for someone that's going through something really hard? And
you went through something really hard and um, part of
the reason why you survived it, along with faith, was
friends and family. So let's talk about those other efforts
real quick. So family, Well, actually my sister is here
with me today, my older sister, Mary Beth. She's in

(29:25):
the book. She's in the book, and she's whatever. For
whatever reason, he always has to stay older. Okay, So
I will tell this story because I mean, this is
my sister and I we've been through some really she's
had some very tragic things in her life as well.
And at my husband's funeral, she got up and introduced

(29:46):
herself as my younger sister. So she's not she's older,
so I like to introduce her always as my older sister.
That makes sense. Um. Anyway, I couldn't have done it
without my family and ference my Emily. They were unbelievable.
My sister, I mean really took over my life. UM,
my parents, who are the most amazing, I mean, the

(30:10):
epitome of unconditional love. Truly, they were there. My husband's family,
I mean his mom and dad were unbelievable, My brother,
I mean all the aunts and uncles and cousins surrounded
my children, surrounded Madison Boone and John Luke and just
were there. I mean Madison, I think sums it up best.

(30:30):
She says, you just show up. I mean they showed up.
They were there. They I mean they were doing everything
for us. Um the friends, half the friends we owed
money to, Like you said, I mean it was you
didn't even realize it at that. I had no idea. Yeah,

(30:53):
I had no idea that we owed probably well, we
owed twenty one and half million dollars to nine people,
more than half of them were friends. I to describe
how they showed up, I mean Matt. Let's start with Matt.
I didn't really know Matt that well. But Matt did

(31:15):
not want to file a claim. He did not because
he was more concerned about the kids and I having money,
because everybody had figured out pretty early on that we
were going to be left with nothing because we were
choosing to not keep the money we wanted to pay
everybody back, and Matt was like, I don't care, I
don't care. I just want their family to be okay.

(31:39):
And he only did it at the insistence of my
attorney called him and said, if you really want to
help her, you need to file acclaim because she's not
going to be able to move forward unless she pays
everybody back. And so just so that to clarify her people. Um,
and I kind of learned this through the book, but yeah,
so because he had deal with these very various people

(32:01):
and I'm still ignorant and orling exactly how it works,
but he reached he reached out to let's just talk
about the friend people, because there's businesses that made investments
or whatever. But sometimes they'd be like, hey, I need
a loan, but I'll pay you back with interest. So
then it's almost like, okay, well cool, and he's my friend.
I'm gonna it needs a hundred thousand, Okay, I'm gonna

(32:23):
get a hundred plus back in like six months. And
he surely he's good for it. I mean, look at
his life, for his whatever he has going on, like
I would think. And what amazed me too is the
friends that were involved. It's almost like they didn't really
talk about it. And my husband and his best friend,
we were all sitting around breaking down your book this

(32:45):
last weekend, and um, you know it's kind of like, yeah,
I get that, like guy code, you know, like don't
don't tell because I don't know if they he would
say to some of them, let's not mention this to Becky. Right,
Apparently he did. I mean there were several people that
he told, you know, don't tell Becky about this, which

(33:05):
in the and was great for me because when every
every time a creditor called, the attorneys would say, did
you ever talk to Becky about it? Did you ever
speak to her about any of these loans? Did she
sign the papers? Which help because the FBI never interviewed
me because it was so clear, right because had you
been quote unquote in on it, you could have gone

(33:28):
to jail. And I mean that's terrifying to think for
all the while this investigation is happening, like, I hope
that I'm clear of this because truly you were innocent,
but but you had so I think originally when I
was bringing up I go all over the place, but
I know my back to My original point about so
people understand Matt filing acclaim and creditors. So there's ninety claims,

(33:53):
ish and what you what what happened was he had
these investments or deals with these people, and then when
he took his life and no longer there, and then
there's millions and millions of dollars out there. I guess
we'll wait. These people suddenly they want their money back,
you know, so, but then part of me is like,
we'll wait a second. Maybe Matt was thinking too, is

(34:15):
like he was caring about you and and the kids.
But also as an adult and a business person, you
make a decision and you loan somebody money, that's saw you.
Part of me it's like I've I've loaned family money
before and I don't expect to get it back. Um,
that's just how it is. But then all these claims

(34:36):
were coming through, and part of me was irritated that
people were filing claims. Like I was proud I knew
I know Matt Mathiah, so I wasn't surprised that he
didn't file a claim. And I understand why you were
pretty adamant that he do. He put it out there
because you just wanted it all clear and organized. You
didn't want any shortcuts or like thank you, didn't want
the sympathy, like I just need to know who I

(34:58):
owe money too, and I to get us done. I
need to pay everybody back period, end of story, because
that's the right thing to do. So yeah, like for me,
I was defensive of you for the people that were
filing the claims and then your lawyer, you know, one
point had to bring in like the ninety people into

(35:19):
a room. And this was kind of back to another
point that I mentioned of like when they all gathered
in the room, some of the people were like, oh hey,
like they knew each other. They're like, oh you two,
you two, Like I had no idea, but because it
was like this code friendship code of like well, we're
not we don't really talk about friends that we loan
money too. And of course, and I guess I assume Mark,

(35:42):
I don't know if he just didn't want you to
if somebody talked to you. Maybe it was two fold.
And I don't know that you'll ever know, um, but
that he didn't want you to know. So you didn't
really understand what was happening because obviously it was major
or that he knew if if, if Heaven forbid, it

(36:02):
ended the way it had to end. He didn't want
to implicate you, right, I don't know. I think he
definitely didn't want to implicate us. I mean, I think
he did what he did to try and protect the
children and me and leave us in good shape. Yeah,
and then when you he did leave um letters, Well,

(36:24):
obviously he called you to say there's a I don't
know if you mentioned the beginning, but you did say
that you got a phone call from him and that
he had done something bad. But he basically said I've
left you and envelope in the closet, and then gosh
with your kids. Your daughter even said no, this can't
be he would have left a letter. And then turns

(36:45):
out he did leave them letters, UM. And so I
imagine as it's all unfolding and your friends and family
are there, and some of these friends that UM are
still they're they're tangled up in this too because of that.
But did you see them still show up for you
even though like for some people, did you see okay, Well,

(37:05):
clearly they're choosing money over friendship, and then others did
you see okay? Wow? I guess they're still here for
us no matter what. There was not one person that
I ever felt like they're choosing money over friendship. I mean,
that's part of the beauty of the story is that
everybody was gracious and kind to us. I mean, they
knew that our intention was to pay everybody back, and

(37:26):
they waited and they were patient with the process. But
they were also like, we don't care. I mean, we
don't care if we get our money back. We just
care about you and the kids. So it was truly
amazing they were there. So one story, it took me
a while to want to go out in public. I mean,

(37:47):
it's just that whole shame people looking at you. I
had been my criminal attorney was telling us we could
be being followed, and it was so important for me
need to pay everybody back. I didn't want to be
seen out like, oh, she's just living it up and
not worried about this. So by the time I was

(38:11):
ready to go out to dinner. It's actually a very
funny story in the book. But we're out at dinner
and you can tell someone's looking at you, so we're
I just feel it and I look over and this
woman is sitting there looking at me, and I just

(38:32):
looked down and I just started crying. I'm like, I
shouldn't have come, this is, this is I shouldn't be
out in public. A couple of days later, I get
a letter in the mail from this woman saying I
was so glad to see you out, and I mean that,

(38:52):
I think is typical of how people were to us.
There was never any you know what I felt. You know, Oh,
she's just judging me. No, she was not. She was
truly glad. And I feel like everyone was like that
to the children and I They were even so she
was a complete stranger, but I mean was a friend

(39:14):
to you at the same time by sending you a letter. Um,
I don't know about a complete she doesn't a complete
strange tree, but she obviously is not one of my
best friends, but still a friend in the community. And
and then too, I think that's a reminder of the
stories we can make up in our head about what's happening.

(39:36):
And so for you, it was like you're trying to
be out to dinner, um and move forward with your life,
but you see someone looking at you. So then the
lie you immediately tell yourself is that she's judging you, um,
when really she was happy to see um. But of
course you had a whole scenario and probably until you
opened that letter you that was the story. You told

(39:57):
your story, and I was not going to go out again.
I mean I was is not going to go out
until we had paid everybody back. But it just was like, Okay, yeah,
and I know you have you have another story in
the book, and I'll save it for people who want
to get it. A friends that kind of kidnapped you
one night to go do something fun, and I think
that that's two. It is probably one of those moments
whereas the probably you needed to have a good time.

(40:19):
When we're grieving and friends don't know what to do.
Sometimes it might be too whisk whisk that person away
and take them out for a good time and not
just show up and be sad with them. I'm sure
we need that too, um, but uh, also don't be

(40:39):
scared to take them out to do something fun that
will bring a smile their face and make them laugh
and forget about everything for maybe a few minutes exactly.
I mean, there were so many things that I couldn't
talk about, and there would just be days where they
would know that I had had our hard day and
they would just bring over a big inflight of old

(41:00):
snowman and we'd put it up in someone's yard. So
that was helpful. I mean, again Madison said it. Everybody
showed up. I mean, I think my sister and Lisa
Stedmond lived with me for what a month maybe, I
mean they were there, they took the kids, made sure
that they were busy. Everybody was bringing their kids over
to make sure the children had things to do. I mean,

(41:23):
it was amazing. I mean, I can't even tell all
the ways that they served the kids, and I I
mean I don't even remember half the things that they
were doing. I keep finding out all these stories of
things that were going on. I didn't cook a meal
and I love to cook, and I didn't think I
was gonna want it, but I didn't cook a meal
until August, the end of August or September, and my

(41:46):
husband died in May. M Yeah, that's a lot of
people showing up for you. Um, so they friends, family. Uh.
We covered that a little bit, and again we're just
giving insight into what obviously more is shared in the book.
And uh, but country music played a big role, which

(42:08):
is also to why Matt Matthias thought of me when
you wrote this book and it's it's it's for pre
order now, and uh so I got like the like
an advanced copy or what do they call that? I
guess feel so fancy when I get stuff in the
mail that is like nobody else has. I mean, some

(42:28):
people have it, but it's not like alf for the public,
and I'm like reading it. Um So Matt thought of
me because while I work in country music. So that'll
be the next thing. Let's talk about music and and
how how it played a role in your heeling. Okay,
so something that you did with each chapter is it

(42:50):
started off with a song quote like, uh, chapter one,
don't go looking for the Reasons, don't go asking Jesus
why Broken Halos by Chris Stapleton, which is such an
amazing song. Yeah, I love that song and it was
one again one of those moments where I was never

(43:13):
going to have the answers to why Mark did what
he did, So hearing that song, it says also after
that two they belonged to Jesus in the by and by,
and it kept me focused on not looking back mm hmm.
And then so how would you I'm trying to picture sometimes.

(43:34):
I know in the book you mentioned like you would
get in the bath and you would put on country
music and sit there and that would be like your time.
But you were really taking in the lyrics. A lot
of times we can listen to songs and just listen
to a whole song and not really know, well, what
what what. I don't even know what they just talked about.
But you were taking it all in and it was

(43:55):
actually helping you. It was really helping. I would start
the day with my ball and then by the end
of the day I had processed so much legal stuff
and dealing with the loss of my husband and all
the things that were going on with my children that
I just needed to relax and it was a little

(44:16):
hard to relax. And I love country music. So I
would get my bubble bath. I would sit in there
and you'd hear these lyrics like every storm runs out
of rain, and you're like, Okay, this really is gonna end.
And when you're in the eye of it, I mean,
you just don't know. But the words just repeated in

(44:39):
my head, and not just the artist in the songs
they were great, but the songwriters. I mean I have
a new love for them. I mean it's real life.
The country music is really real life. Yeah, and you
missed mentioned Josh Turner earlier and we were talking, and
you know that's chapter nine. It says there ain't nothing
that can't be done by me and odd and nobody

(45:01):
coming come in between me and God. Yeah right, I
mean that was pretty much what I lived by every day,
We're going to do this. And I turned to God
a lot again. I mean, there were so many times
that I couldn't talk to anybody about what was going on.
I had my had ten attorneys, so most of them

(45:24):
knew everything. But there were two that were like my brothers,
who are the only ones that I could really truly
talk to, which again was a God thing. They were
both godly men, my three main attorneys, my three wise men.
I ended up dubbing them, um. So God provided once again,

(45:46):
these three men. So again back to the faith and bonding.
When I'm saying it was so much more of it
me and God thing, it's because I had to turn
to Him because I didn't have anybody else. I couldn't
even talk to my sister and tell our things. My
attorneys are like, Okay, you can't tell anybody this right
m Chapter fourteen, I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic,

(46:11):
awful beautiful life. And that's awful beautiful life by Daryl Worley,
which you went to breakfast with him this morning, which
how how crazy amazing was that? It was crazy amazing
And oh my gosh, I love him even more. He
is the most amazing man. I cried ten times. I
think he cried ten times. Wow. I mean, he actually

(46:35):
has an amazing story. But his words, his words, I
told him. I mean, it's like I'm meeting my namesake.
His words pulled me through the hardest, hardest times, and
his these are his stories. He told me, these are

(46:55):
actual things that happened in my life. And you could
feel it. I mean I could feel when I was
sitting there in the tub really processing this. I'm like,
this is coming from their heart. And it was very
clear when we had breakfast with Daryl Worley this morning
that he is that person. He's real. I mean, it's
why I think I felt I don't even know what

(47:20):
the right word is. Um, I'm gonna cry. Really, it's
why I felt like I could make it through Um,
the darkest times was the like being able to have

(47:40):
other people's words which relating to them, to them, identify
with them and knowing, Okay, they've gone through this too.
They and of course to me and Darryl's songs, he
was clearly clinging to God as well. Right. And I think, UM,
while your book isn't a song, UM, you're sharing your words,

(48:06):
you're sharing your experience just like songwriters do. UM. And
you're putting it out there so that other people don't
feel alone and they know how to navigate through tragedy.
It may not it's not going to be the exact
same story because we all have something different, UM, but
we all have to go through really crappy things at times. UM.

(48:31):
In your case like uh yeah, I can't even imagine.
But the the things that you clung to, you you
went through it and you had you came out the
other side. And I'm not saying you're through it all
the way. I don't think you ever will be until.
I mean, this is something you're going to live with
for the rest of your life. But you did gain

(48:51):
some wisdom and you know what what things were there
for you? And UM, you're you chose to be strong
and and share it and put these words down. And
I know it wasn't easy for you, um, but that's
what songwriters do every day. So you're kind of like
a you're a storyteller to well, I'm a storyteller, but
I think I used them. They showed me how to

(49:14):
tell the story. Like I said, you could feel it
in their music. There's I mean funny things in there too.
I mean that pull you through like I wish I
didn't know now but I didn't know then. I mean
there there's the there's the laughing side of the country
music too, not just the deep feeling side, but the
laughing the Prey for You song where he wishes a

(49:35):
flower pot will fall on his head. Those moments of
laughter in the country music are great too. Yeah. Well,
I think that, Um, I appreciate you putting it down.
I think that people will take a lot, not just
from listening this, but if they order your book, they'll
take away, um, some stuff. I mean not only just

(49:57):
taking in your story, um, because it's it's a compelling
read because of everything you went through, but really what
is in here is And I say that it's so
hard because you don't want someone's tragedy to be your
entertainment per se, because that's doesn't seem like the right

(50:18):
thing to say. But it's a book and it's a
good read, and sometimes people are looking for a book.
But I would say it's one of those things. I
wouldn't look at it like that. I would look at
it like if you have gone through something tough or
someone in your life has and you want to learn
how to be there for somebody or navigate through it
for yourself, then you might need a few efforts in
some country music in your life. And so thank you

(50:41):
for sharing your experience for others. So we have four
king and Country sitting in for a little segment today,
which is awesome. So it's Luke and Joel and you know,
y'all are y'all did a song with Dolly. I'm just

(51:02):
gonna put it out there. There's a song with Dolly.
And I was driving in with my friend who said,
you know, I really feel like when I get to Heaven,
the angels are going to sound like Dolly. What do
y'all think? Well, you know, it's interesting. We have a
our journey with Dolly is probably different than a lot
of folks it's it's kind of sporadic, and mine is

(51:26):
mostly the bodyguard. I Will always love you, Whitney Houston,
you know, and a little bit of Joline. But it
really when we really kind of discovered her was I
watched this Netflix original show Dumpling with my wife with
Jennifer Aniston. It's so good. It's a great film. I
watched it with my daughter and it was great. It

(51:47):
would be a good film for your daughter as well.
So we watched it and I was just Dolly produced
it and her music is kind of like the one
of the characters in the film, almost like it's laced
with Dolly Partner music. And I every song, I was like,
that's a Dolly saying that. And so it was like
Dolly has always been around us and maybe like angels

(52:08):
around us and amongst us, and we didn't even know it.
And when we kind of that was the night that
we had this idea. I said to Mary, I wonder
if we we should approach as preposterous as it is,
we should approach Dolly to sing on this song. God
only knows, because we wanted someone like a strong female
voice to kind of take it further than we felt

(52:29):
like we could take it as to kind of homeschooled
Australian guys, and um, within like two weeks we're on
the phone with her directly and she said, this is
one of the great songs I've heard and which our
jaws are still on the floor because of that. And
then from that point to this, I have to say, Amy,

(52:50):
she has just been such a light, speaking of like
angels and heaven and like from professionalism to grace, to
poise to generosity with her time. Like we did a
music video together, and um, obviously she sang on the
song and she was so eager she wanted to get
it just right. She's sang all these different takes. It's
just been a really splendid Well so you said it

(53:13):
took like two weeks for that to kind of transpire.
So but like, do you just reach out to people
that know people that was crazy? Yeah? You don't ever,
you know, when you have these crazy ideas and you
kind of throw this like hail Mary, you know what
they could say is or just not get back to you, right, Okay,
And so you threw the hall Mary. Yeah, Well we

(53:34):
knew I actually speaking of like heaven and church and angels,
and Sunday School. I taught two of her um sort
of junior managers in Sunday School. Oh well yeah, and
so that was my first was like I'm just gonna
call them and kind of soft love, and they were like,
we can't love this. So then they took it to

(53:56):
Danny her lead manager, and then within a week he'd
taken her and she had just made the comment to
Danny Um that she really wanted to start leaning into
more kind of inspirational, you know, positive and even faith
based music. And so she just within like forty out

(54:17):
she made that comment and then this song showed up
on her desk, and so she she took it as okay, well,
God only knows which that. I don't think we've said
the name of the song just yet. So some people
miss listening maybe like oh, I already loved that song.
I listened to it already. Other people might be like,
what is that song? And I recommend you go download

(54:38):
it and listen to it and take in the lyrics.
And you know, one thing that we try to do
on this podcast is a lot of the guests that
we bring on or life stories that I share. There
are different things, uh, you know, Sometimes it's lights. Sometimes
it's heavy. Sometimes it's you know, something beauty and vain
and not really important in the grand scheme of things,

(55:00):
about stuff people like to hear about, or sometimes it's
like heavy stuff. But either way, I hope they walk
away from one of the little things that we discuss um,
you know, not feeling alone, like whoever needed to hear
that that day? And I feel like that's what that
you all done with that song is everybody's on a
journey and everybody has something going on, has a different

(55:21):
story and depending on different seasons in life, but like
you know, you're not you're not alone in it. I
think that was what was for me so special about
having Dolly on that song is when I heard her
sing it, whether or not voice of an angel or whatever.
When I heard her sing it, I felt the weight
of her career in those words God only knows which

(55:43):
have been through which you think for her being in
the entertainment world for sixty something year, is being a
female in this world that she kind of paved away
for in country music. I don't know. They felt like
there was this beauty that struck me. She's something that
God only knows which have been through. God only knows
what they say about you. God only knows the really you.

(56:04):
But there's a kind of love that God only knows.
And I think the thing that makes God approachable is
that all the things that we have done in our life,
the mistakes that we've made or whatever, that it to
be able to have a statement like there's still a
God that loves you despite that was the thing to
us hearing Dolly, seeing that that there was a significant
weight to that that I did not anticipate. When I

(56:26):
heard anybody else saying that I may or may not
have cried, I'm sure, yeah, I could imagine probably taking
in that song, depending on again what season of life
you're in, Like if you're going to listen to it
for the first time, it may hit you in a
certain way where you do get emotional, But being there
witnessing it go down did so did yall record together?

(56:46):
We were actually out of town, and that was part
of the reason that I think it hit me so
hard because we couldn't make the recording session. A couple
of our producers went and and they were emotional, but
we had never heard anything until like it was kind
of put in the song that was sent to us,
and so that compounded it even more, and I feel

(57:07):
like his right is there there is We kind of
say there are songs that write you, there are songs
that you write, and then there are songs that write you.
And this felt like a song that wrote us, Like
it was right in a time where I was becoming
an American citizen. So there was a lot of like
looking at where we find ourselves socially and politically and

(57:28):
spiritually and all the rest of it. And now, Luke,
are you American citizen too? Joel is the last one
in the entire family to get it, so he makes
it like out that he's like some sort of hero
that he did this, and the truth is we've all
done that and he's still talking about it nearly four
years later. It's two years. Okay, yeah, you know, well

(57:51):
just a side note on that. Did you think the
test to become a citizen was hard? I was horrifying? Yeah,
I mean even as Americans. Sometimes on the Bobby Bones Show,
will do you know on you know, fourth of July
episodes or something like that, we'll do some like do
you love your country test? Or how well like would
you even be an American citizen, if you had to
take the test today and a lot of times I
missed some. I think that it's kind of like it's

(58:13):
kind of like the driver's test, you know, when you
take it's like they intentionally put things in there that
unless you've read this book, you're failing that thing, you
know what I mean? And I think it's similar like this.
I mean, how many House of Representatives are there in America? Amy,
I don't know that's true. And it's like there's I

(58:36):
just had to prove on you something. Who was the
first president? It was the second? Uh do you know
who the second was? They said, good for you. President
of the United States was not John Adams, Yes it was.
So it was one of you two, Like who was

(58:57):
the better at school? Who's better at school? We never
went to Luke actually literally we were home schooled. Everyone, Okay,
So when you never actually went to say I went
to a year of school, it makes sound like if
you're homeschooled, you have no metric of intelligence or not.
Like he's like, you know what, if you don't go
to school, we have no idea, if you know what

(59:19):
it basically basically basically like the way people gauge not intelligence,
but like you know, i Q or whatnot is based
on tests and stuff. Really we didn't really do tests,
but we still too. We did. We did a life tests. Yeah,
I feel bad because I'm the one that derailed this
talking about you know, if y'all were both US citizens,

(59:42):
but you were going somewhere with this about you being
Oh yeah I was. It was very profound, but it's
gone now. But it is no no what I was
gonna say. They're their songs. There are songs that you
write in their songs that write you and this it's funny,
even in this season where we find ourselves UM, where

(01:00:02):
I feel like there's a we're more connected than ever,
you know, podcast, social media, smartphones, you name it, um,
the Internet, thank you Al Gore. UM, where we are
more connected than ever, and yet it feels like we're
we're more kind of isolated and separated and even I
daresay kind of segregated than we have been in a

(01:00:23):
long time. And so the notion we throw this phrase
around so flippantly that God only knows why. You know,
this kind of stuff happens, and usually it's tied to
some kind of negative connotation, but if you really dig
deep into the the idea of it, the the idea
that we are designed, that we are created for a purpose,

(01:00:45):
that you're not a mistake, no matter how you've found
your way to the oath, that you are you know,
fearfully and wonderfully made, and and and that you might
tell yourself lies, other people might speak negative things into you,
but the fact is you are extravagantly loved by your designer,

(01:01:06):
by your creator. That to me is one of the
recipes to great unity, not only in this country but
around the world of going man, we are even if
I'm not socially accepted, or even if I're rejected or whatnot,
I'm I'm actually loved by the whole designer of this
whole thing. I'm loved by this creator. What a what

(01:01:26):
a profound thought. And that's what we've found and felt
firsthand with this song that kind of wrote us that,
whether it's Dolly Coming on Board or we did a
version with Timberland and Echo Smith, it was like people
were coming out saying from different walks of life, different perspectives, saying,
I get I can rather behind that, I love that.
I feel like anything that can unite people especially like

(01:01:50):
you were saying, it's such a divisive, tense time where
everybody is just you're seeing the shift kind of happened,
I think where people are starting to realize, Okay, like, look,
let's focus on what we're for and not so much
what we're against. And like, uh, some people are not
there yet. They're over on Facebook. I mean they live,

(01:02:14):
they live over there, except for all you good ones
that we talked to you. But I mean occasionally it's
just like gosh, why why the why so heavy and
divisive and negative and um, so yeah, to have something
that promotes unity and love and and and then yeah,
a message of that you're not you're not alone and

(01:02:37):
God only knows. Like I feel like, um, music is
so therapeutic. I mean we all know that I'm not
the only feels that way, but it's so therapeutic for people.
And so for you all to have that gift, to
be able to give people is is amazing. You go
throughout history, it's like before theater, before film, before technology,
before even language, Like the thing that people had was

(01:02:59):
really him in melody that like you go to any
remote culture in the world, that's what we have. That's
the great gift to humanity. I feel like, did you
learn that in home school? Yeah? I didn't. That's gonna
be a question for everything school, any opinion you learned
at home king. But I thought it was funny when

(01:03:21):
you all came in, Uh, you know, Joel was like
open arms, like hull away and then loop even like
a minute later, and I thought, Okay, these people are huggers,
like and I'm a hugger, so I'm just gonna go
for the hug. And I feel like that made me
sound rude. Sorry, that is not the case. That is

(01:03:42):
not rul Some people are huggers. Some people are not.
Like Bobby, who I do the morning show with, he's
not a hugger. No, here's here's what happens to me.
So we go, you know, show as we do meet
and greets. That's where I was getting. I want to
know if people listening eventually one day end up at
the meet greet. I just want to go ahead and perfect. Now.
I don't think we've ever talked about this before. Well,
we got to prepare people. It's good, it's good. Yeah.

(01:04:04):
So I just have this thing like I hug my wife,
I hug my kids, I hug people that are in
my like I know them, you know, they're like in
my inner circle to a degree. Got it. But when
people and this is this is what Joel mentioned right
before we started this The challenging thing about meet and
greets is these people come and they know you. They
listen to the podcast, they listen to your interviews, they

(01:04:25):
listen to all these things. But I don't know them,
and so Joel's They're like, how how you doing? You know,
and give it all these hugs and I'm like, I'm good, Yeah,
here's my hand, you know, let me shake you, let
me get to know you. Maybe we will finish with
the hug, depending on how the conversation goes. But usually
I'm like, I'm want to shake their hand, you know,
want to get to get them. Maybe pat and I'm
like a puppy dog. Yeah, that's a very good way

(01:04:46):
of putting it. To keep it arms length. No, don't
take this, I don't. I think it. Just as people
are listening right now relating to you, they're like, that
is so me. I don't pass out hugs. And I'm
tired of people thinking that I should pass out hugs
and that you're only nice if you hug because it's
not you're so kind, you're sweet. Well, now I will

(01:05:07):
say this when people come up in the signing lines
that they say, hey, can I get a hug, I'm
like absolutely, because that feels like a very Maybe. I'm like,
maybe we're doing like an etiquette, a proper etiquette from
meet and greet type conversion, but there's a permission thing
to it. Like I think you're kind of like Jerry
Seinfeld and like I'm hilarious kind of like kesh did

(01:05:27):
you ever see that with Jerry Seinfeld and Kesha a
couple of months? Oh, yeah, that was Jerry was she
was like, can I give your hugging chairs? Like now,
I don't know? You was like, and fair enough, No,
I see it different. I see it as we now
we're somehow connected psychoanalyzing, but you know, we're not connected
through like a physical meeting, like is the convention way

(01:05:51):
convention way for two humans to me? But somehow through
your journey and my journey, um, we have had some
kind of like cyber into nection with the music. Well,
small world, we actually are connected because your cousin is
the pastor of my church together and then we have
like some Haiti connections. I totally what you're saying about

(01:06:13):
everybody being connected by the way. I just wanted to
also just talk about how small the world can be.
And y'all came all the way from Australia. Did the
outback of Australia. There's no power down there, speaking different language.
Y'all eat kangaroo? I have me too. What do you
think of it? I thought it was good. When did
you have it? Did you have it? I had it
in North Carolina at a restaurant called Chef Warrants. It's

(01:06:36):
like the nicest restaurant this cute little town we used
to live in, and he had kangaroo as an appetizer,
and at first it threw me and I refused to
eat it because I thought, how how in the world
could I eat a kangaroo? And then I went through
a phase rob his vegan but this is pre that.
But you know, I really struggled with it, and then
finally I was like, forget it. Everyone's raving about this kangaroo,

(01:06:58):
so I'm just gonna eat it. And he, the chef
told me, he said, look, and I don't know if
he's right. Y'all are the ones from Australia. But he said,
it's like here, you eat deer right there. Kangaroos right
he said, over there, it's similar. It's like you eating
a cute little deer. Fun facts about kangaroos. Kangaroos are
actually the only national mascot in the world because we

(01:07:20):
have them on all of our like insignias and stuff
in Australia. The only national mascot in the world that
is actually a pest. Oh see, so yeah, y'all need kangaroos. Pests,
and the Chinese love kangaroos to you. Basically we hunt
kangaro Well we don't. We've been on hunts with kangaroos,
but we sorry everyone, We've hunted kangaroos and they and

(01:07:40):
they and then they basically ship them all over to China.
Oh wow. Yeah. Well, and apparently in North Carolina and
Arizona kangaroo and Arizona. Yeah weird? Okay, Well, so one
more Australia thing. All growing up there, If you grew
up there and then you came here, what are like,
what's your favorite American TV show? Like that we grow?

(01:08:03):
How old are you all? Oh? I know you're born
years I brought your hats that are your born years.
It's very nice. Yeah, we'll have to hug after this
because it's a nice I'll take it because you have
Luca gift and he'll give you a lot. No, but
I have little four things totes for your wives and
burn your hats for you all. Which is definitely current

(01:08:25):
favorite TV show or like favorite TV show like Friends,
like you mentioned Jerry Seinfeld, Like is there stuff on
Netflix where you're like, oh, but I mean it's a
solid American show, or like do people and I'll show
you watch Friends. I don't know, well, are you so
you're talking about like growing up in Australia? What we
really want? Clarity? Anything? I know? I thought I didn't

(01:08:47):
deliver this, right, I guess. Is there an American show
that's like a pop phenomenon, like it's like so popular,
but yet y'all also knew of it there? Like Friends,
Great Alaskan Frontier, right, that's all asking the Alaska the
La front was one of my favorite shows. But I
didn't grow up on that. I mean we were pretty young.
Isn't that American? Oh you're right. Let me give you

(01:09:11):
a geography lesson about the United States of America Australia.
I I've never been to Alasrica, although my husband did
live there for five That's amazing that you just said that,
and and we have a record of that, and you
know what, I wasn't home stool right. I'm sorry. I
don't know if this applies, but I literally my wife

(01:09:34):
does not like the whole um like slapstick, nineties humor,
like Christmas Vacation and all that. She's not in on
that at all. So it was hard to find a
comedy like Seinfeld. She's kind of on the fence with
The Office. The Office it is Magic Goode Bore the
whole thing, and we're literally halfway through. She's never seen it.

(01:09:54):
It's such an intelligent humor. She thinks it's funnier than
I think. But I don't think speaking of being PC,
I don't think you could make the Office today. Oh yeah,
that'd be rough. Some stuff that Stue Curl says, I'm like,
how did he get away with that? On? But even
Friends has that sometimes some episodes where you think, how
in the world did they get away with that? But

(01:10:14):
it just was a different That's the beauty of comedy
to the like we can't we're not really funny, so
we can't get away with a lot. But comedians can
actually get away with the watch because they're doing it
to try and make you like, you know, they still
get themselves in a lot, and it's a satire on life. Really, yes,
do you like that words satire? I mean school with

(01:10:38):
that that little joke. But okay, Well, I just want
to encourage everybody to check out this song. Um, I'm
gonna play a little bit right here, godat and you know,
share it with somebody else that you think I need

(01:10:59):
to hear, and you know, check out other songs from
for King and Country. And then Dolly if you've never
heard of her stuff, check it out and come to
a show and give Luke a big bed. Yes. And
then on Instagram, y'all are at for King and Country. Yeah,
And I mean you have a lot of followers on Instagram,
which we do follow you. Oh well, look what I'm

(01:11:22):
gonna do right now, I'm falling. I've been waiting for this.
You just got one more follower, which which you know,
so we followed Bobby as well, and man, that that
fellow is all over the place. Yeah, he is busy.
He's everywhere we thought we were busy, and I was like, no,
we got nothing on Bobby bones. Yeah, well everyone's different
kinds of are so it's all you'll have a lot

(01:11:45):
going on different which is why I appreciate to y'all
taking the time to come in and talk with with
me here. And I think people are really going to
love this, so I appreciate it. This is this is
this is a walking up. Can we go out with
y'all sharing four things that you're grateful for just quickly,
like you can be trivial or serious or whatnot, but

(01:12:05):
just four things that you're grateful for full things. I'm
grateful well, uh, my wife and kiddos absolutely because we
got we got three boys, a six, four, and two
year old, which is a lot of fun in our households.
So very thankful for that. I live in the country
and I literally pray nearly every night how grateful I
am to live in this home. It's in the middle
of nowhere, and you know, he's isolated, he's away from

(01:12:28):
the world. She'd been waiting for that moment um, and uh,
I'm grateful for um um. I'm grateful to have work
that I enjoy doing. I'm grateful that it's something that
I feel like I can help people along in their
their life, if that makes sense. It's not just the

(01:12:49):
job I was. I was. I was driving up here
and I passed by the Saturn plant and they were striking,
and I had a moment where yesterday my son was
with me and he goes, oh, Dad, those are the
people that don't have jobs, and I was like ah,
And so just made me realize how thankful I am
to actually have something that I like like doing and
that that I feel like I hope that helps people

(01:13:09):
along in this life, you know. And a fourth one,
the fourth one is going to be a challenge for
me because I had three that I felt really confident about.
What about you don't know about the fourth about your brother? Well,
I like Joel most I actually had this whole thing planned.
I am grateful actually to be able to do music

(01:13:30):
not alone, because it can be I don't know if
you feel like this too in the Morning show, but
it can be a heavy toll. So to be able
to do it together is a true gift. So speaking,
physical affection, Luke and I have this really bad habit
because we spent more time with one another in the
last decade than we have our spouses, probably, which is frightful.
We don't say hi and by to one another, and

(01:13:52):
it's not deliberate, we just actually forget. I will go
and say hi and by to every single person in
the room except for Luke and you your lies. And
maybe this is a little charge speaking of being grateful
to those of you that have someone who's near and
dear you just they kind of become part of the furniture.
So with that nine. Number one four things I am

(01:14:14):
grateful for is my little brother and to be on
this musical life journey with him, I love it. I'm
thankful for Caromelo koalas they are good. Look him up
Caromelo coas it's a it's Cadbury's chocolate with caramel on
the inside. You mostly can't get them here. UM. I

(01:14:37):
am very thankful for my darling wife. We've been married
for six years and she's marvelous and smart and weird
and awesome, and we have a great game as well.
Awesome merry weather. That's a family one. So I'm going
to put that in like the same bucket as number three. Um.

(01:15:00):
And then actually speaking of this whole like American citizen thing.
I'm really thankful for this country. Really am like we
are immigrants. We came over. Um, we started off where
two of seven kids we married Americans. Six or the
seven of us. My youngest sister just started dating in
American so we're probably seven for seven. And we have

(01:15:22):
built a life here and friends and family and and opportunity.
It's been a wonderful place. And so I'm I'm grateful
for the United States of America. Thank you. I feel
like it's an American I'm I'm obligated to say thank
you for That's something I think even as um, you
know what's going through my mind, and I was like,

(01:15:42):
oh gosh, you know someone that is an immigrant. You know,
sometimes we I take it for granted. I mean, Australia
is probably amazing. I've never been, but a lot of
times I don't think of how lucky I am to
have just been born here, even though I know that
that's a huge blessing in itself. But there's a lot
of works. But I'm trapped exactly. I'm not saying that
we've I think you'll we've had some travels like spent

(01:16:05):
time and places where it's like whoa like. I don't
know if you'll mean me Haiti. I've also been to
certain places in Africa and you know, when you're there,
beautiful people, amazing, amazing people. But when it comes to
like where you have to be, like where everything we've
been given, Um, yeah, I don't want to halp on this,

(01:16:26):
but I'll tell you a real quick story. I got
sworn in just down the road here, um at the
courthouse in Nashville, and there was twenty four of us
from sixty different countries. It was magnificent, you know, colors,
shapes and size. We were all there, accents and language,
and the judge presiding it was maybe more excited than
we were, which we were all very excited. But he

(01:16:48):
was so excited because you can think judges just two
kind of negative. They're like, you know, father in laws, myather.
He knows a little bit about judging. They're doing you know,
criminal stuff, and most of that ab is like putting
people behind bars, and in this case, it's welcoming them
into this country. And he gave us this charge. He said,
this is your responsibilities. Assist citizen. Bring your ideas, bring

(01:17:10):
your culture, bring your art, bring your faith, bring your food.
I said, oh man um, and because this is the
beautiful building blocks of the United States of America is diversity,
and I think if we can wake up to that.
But it's actually not a negative that the beauty of

(01:17:30):
America is all of these differents. The Hispanic my wife's Hispanic,
it's the Hispanic culture, is the African American culture, It's
the it's the Caucasian culture, it's the it's the Asian
culture and everyone in between. It's the Indian culture. It's
all of these coming together and actually making something beautiful. Yeah,
I've Haitian. My dad just moved to Nashville and to
an assistant living type place and the woman that runs

(01:17:54):
his floor. Each floor has a floor manager and her
name is Marie, and she's Haitian. And you know, she's
now an American citizen and has been for quite some time,
but grew up in Porta Prince, where my kids grew up. Honestly,
it's what I think I saw my dad. We went
to visit multiple ones. When I found out Marie was
on the third floor and that was the only room available,

(01:18:14):
I was like, shut up. I mean, I feel like
because and you know what she did last Saturday. Um,
we got there and she told me, she goes, my
shift starts at two pm. I want you to come
up there bring your kids. So my dad had been
sick all week, so I was kind of like, shoot,
just gonna work out. And then Friday he was like,
I feel better. So Saturday brought the kids up there.
At two pm, I walked in my dad's and she

(01:18:35):
had to start her shift, so she was working. But
then sitting on my dad's little counter was like three
of the biggest tup aware things full of Haitian food
um that she had made. That put my daughter, say, sire,
she's twelve and she's only been here like a year
and a half. She's got a lot going on, you know,

(01:18:56):
and like she gets happy from time to time for things.
She's she's really sweet. But our younger son, he's he's
a little bit more. He's not processing quite as much
because he was younger. I have not seen her smile
like that. And then Marie stopped by to see if
we got the food, and they were speaking creel to
each other, and my daughter's eyes just lit up like

(01:19:18):
her heart had been, Like she was like a flower
that had been watered and I just thought, like, how
cool is it that Marie got to move from Port
to Prince and become an American citizen and get a
job here where my dad now is, and then my
little Haitian kids who I adopted are now here getting
to feel the love from somebody from their culture that's

(01:19:39):
now an American too, And it was just such a
special like I have goosebumps. She was even thinking about
it because she doesn't. I mean, she was so, you know,
so much food, and she said I made extra so
that they could have She made it all at home,
I mean huge, four big, I don't even know they
made tupwar this pick and I couldn't believe it. And
my dad even like, do you think she wanted us

(01:20:01):
to scoop out stuff for the kids and then give
it back to her so she could keep it? And
she said, no, that is for later, for them to
have it at home as much as they want. And
like she also, I know she works really hard and
doesn't like I wouldn't I need to think of a
way like how It's not like I wanted to be like, oh,
here's can I pay you for this? Because that was

(01:20:22):
clearly her love language, her gift like her. She wanted
to do that, so now I need to find a
way to just repay her. But you just you brought
in how all the different people have been welcome in
different ways, and how then allowing that can touch people
that come here other ways like adoption, because if not,
then my kids would just see a bunch of white

(01:20:43):
Americans everywhere. And I don't want and I don't want
that for them, like I want them to see all
walks of life. And then also even how cool their
own culture in America. Well, and that's that's what's been
so amazing. I mean, thanks for sharing that, because that's
just that's it, that is in flesh and blood, the

(01:21:07):
beauty of it. And for us even with this whole
like got in their nose and connecting to Dolly. Now
as Australians transplanted to the United States and being part
of this country, we're able to go and sing these
songs and off of some sort of encouragement or hope
or positivity to people, um based on the country saying

(01:21:29):
we'll come on in yeah. Otherwise we'd just be down
in Australia eating kangaroo, eating kangaroo. Well thanks, Okay, that's
a wrap on today's episode. A big thank you to
Becky for coming on and um sharing her story, and
I just hope you all enjoyed our little chat about

(01:21:49):
faith and family and friends and country music. And a
big thank you too for King and Country for coming
in to sit down with me. I hope that you'll
check out their music along with Becky's book. UM. We
just want to encourage and lift up so many guests
that we have on our podcast, So if something really
resonates with you, like try to reach out to these

(01:22:10):
people or trying to support them in whatever way that
you can by maybe sending them an encouraging note or
buying their book, or downloading their music or whatever the case.
But now we'll get into the email shout out, and
it is from Julie. Hey, Amy, I'm writing you to
share something I witnessed on my way to work this
morning that I thought you would love. While coming to
a stoplight, the car in front of me had bumped

(01:22:31):
the car in front of it. The two cars pulled over.
The woman in the second car the one that bumped,
got out, looking completely horrified that this happened. The woman
in the first car got out and went to look
for damage. From where I was, everything looked fine. I
see the woman in the second car holding her hands
over her face, and the next thing I see is
the woman in the first car put out her arms

(01:22:52):
and hug the second car woman. Seeing this warmed my
heart so much. The first woman choosing to show kindness,
and just seeing women lift other women up in general,
it was a beautiful thing. I love your positivity and
thought you would enjoy hearing about this story as well.
Have a great day, and Julie, thank you for sharing this.
And I kind of thought this goes along with kind

(01:23:13):
of what I was saying in the intros. You never
know what people are going through, and just like having
that grace, And obviously if you bump into another car,
you feel horrible and mortified, and sometimes your first reaction
if you're in a hurry to get somewhere, you just
nobody has time to get into a car accident. And
then there's the whole money thing. There's so many factors
that go into that to where you could react in
such a negative way and make the other person feel

(01:23:34):
really bad for their mistake. But I think what this
person showed was compassion and a little bit of grace
to be like, hey, I'm gonna go ahead and put
my arms out and give you a hug because I
know that this sucks and you didn't mean to do this,
so let's hug. And this is just a car example,
but I feel like we could use this in multiple

(01:23:55):
areas of our life that maybe sometimes we just need
to reach out our arms to somebody and offer them
a hug. And I think it can make a world
of difference. And um, so Julie, thank you for sharing
that email. And then I guess before we go, uh
put a total rap on the episode, I will, um

(01:24:17):
just send encouragement per usual, since it's Christmas shopping time
that you've got to get your four things to orders
in and I love that y'all want to support Haiti.
We get messages to from people that are like I
have decided, I'm, you know, gonna get lots of things
from a spaw for Christmas for Christmas gifts because I

(01:24:41):
love that it has a give back component and we
love that too. And I'm trying to get somebody to
come on to talk about what's happening in Haiti so
you'll can have a better picture. But just know that
like things in Haiti right now are really really, really
devastating and bad. So Um, I just know that when
you're shopping with us Squaw, you're getting something super cute,
but you're also going to make a tremendous impact in Haiti,

(01:25:03):
especially at a time when they really really need it.
So keep that in mind. And if you want to
get four things totes for your friends, just be thinking
of their favorite four things. I know it takes some time,
but it also takes us time to make them and
ship them. And if we get a bunch of orders
at the same time, then we have to cut things off.
So we're trying to pace everything out and encourage our
loyal people to order now so that way, when it

(01:25:24):
gets closer to Christmas, some people that are the stragglers,
they can still get their totes. So Um radio ama
dot com to find links to shop a squaw and
even pimp and joy stuff. But yeah, that's it. Okay,
have a great day and talk to you later. Okay,

(01:25:47):
little food for you. So life, Oh it's pretty bad,
It's pretty beautiful, beautiful, laugh a little month. Okay, cut
your kick in it with Fourthing with Amy Brown

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