HANNAH MOONEY PT 2: Getting Real About Couples Therapy, Sobriety, Healing Trauma, Faith & More

Caroline continues her conversation with Hannah Mooney in this Part 2 episode of Get Real. Hannah shares about her experience in intensive couple’s therapy with husband Shay Mooney (of Dan & Shay) which uncovered a lot of her own unresolved trauma. Hannah shares about dealing with bullying when she was growing up and how it manifested into a belief that she is not chosen. She talks about that belief showing up in her marriage and how she has leaned into her faith and therapy for healing. Hannah also discusses finding out she was pregnant at 23 years old with her first baby, just weeks after looking at engagement rings with Shay. Hannah opens about the tough aspects of being married to a touring musician, watching her husband Shay choose to pursue sobriety and God answering her prayer to bring fruitful friendships into his life. Hannah shares about their current season of life and being able to pursue their dreams together including tackling designing some rental properties in Fort Smith, Arkansas and bringing another Mooney baby into the fold!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:09):
Carl Line.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
She's a queen and talking and a song.

Speaker 3 (00:16):
She's getting really not afraid to feel episode and so
just let it flow.

Speaker 2 (00:20):
No one can do.

Speaker 1 (00:21):
We quiet Cary Line.

Speaker 3 (00:25):
Its sound for Caroline Hannah.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
I love you, I love you.

Speaker 3 (00:31):
I have a feeling. We're gonna do part two? Are
we We're gonna do part two?

Speaker 1 (00:35):
Are you ready?

Speaker 3 (00:35):
I'm ready?

Speaker 1 (00:36):
Microphone is rolling away, so I'm just gonna hold it
to my face. I loved part one where we talked
about the front, the front half of Hannah.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
But we can't stop now.

Speaker 1 (00:45):
We can't because now we're getting to like the juiciest bits.
So can we keep going?

Speaker 2 (00:49):
Can we dive in?

Speaker 3 (00:50):
I hope we do part two? Here we can be
sad if we did.

Speaker 1 (00:52):
I know this is like, oh my god, the main attraction.

Speaker 3 (00:55):
Buckle up, here we come. We did a marriage intensive
at on site, no okay, but we did it with
another couple. It was a two Christian husband and wife
like counselor pairs, and so we would come in with
them every day. And I was so excited about it
because I was like, we're going to fix all of
Shay's problems.

Speaker 2 (01:16):
How to go?

Speaker 3 (01:18):
We came out of it, and I was just like
shell shocked because we had storyboarded Have you ever heard
of this?

Speaker 1 (01:25):
Oh? Tell me, this is good? I love this.

Speaker 3 (01:27):
We storyboarded out this was one of our exercises. We
each were given a poster board and we wrote out
in thumbnail pictures our lives beautiful. It was like moments
of our lives.

Speaker 1 (01:43):
A great way to know yourself and your partner.

Speaker 3 (01:45):
Gosh, when I tell you, it was emotionally exhausting because
I imagine thirty years I was thirty, this was three
years ago. I went through thirty years of like trying
to think of the things that like impacted my life
and like that were pretty important to who I've become.

Speaker 1 (02:01):
So shared a lot.

Speaker 3 (02:02):
We spent hours just like doodling. Like it's funny because
on our storyboards, we both start out and it's like
so beautiful and like detailed, and by the end it's
just like stick figures and we're just like dead and
nothing else happened in the last ten years because I'm
tired and my brain hurts.

Speaker 1 (02:21):
What a way to clear the pipe cell?

Speaker 3 (02:23):
Well, so we did that, and the actual like realization
you probably learned of yourself. Well, no, the shocking part
was that she then went through and she was like,
I'm gonna go through. I want I want each of you,
one at a time, to go through your life and
explain each of these and then I'm gonna come back
through with my sticky notes and I'm gonna I'm gonna

(02:43):
put on the board what I hear you saying?

Speaker 1 (02:46):
WHOA, This is intense, so intense, exhausting.

Speaker 3 (02:50):
It was like when I tell you, like emotionally.

Speaker 1 (02:52):
Like an exorcism almost.

Speaker 3 (02:54):
It was, so she ran out a sticky notes.

Speaker 1 (02:57):
We just laughing over there. It's not like an exorcism.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
I kind of I feel like we went through Shaise
and basically they were like, oh you can turn lemons
into lemonade. What she can't? Like that was like the
thesis for his life. And she ran out of sticky notes.

Speaker 1 (03:13):
For me, You're like, we're gonna come vic Se, I
got this all figured out.

Speaker 3 (03:18):
So she literally ended with like chronic trauma and I
was like what, I.

Speaker 1 (03:26):
Was like what?

Speaker 3 (03:27):
So anyway, all that to say, we both spent that
week and I think the.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
What a moment in your marriage?

Speaker 3 (03:38):
I think the important part was that we were we
were opening this up in front of each other, and
so we literally and then we had to like talk
to our younger selves, this is.

Speaker 1 (03:49):
So beautiful and vulnerable each other. But just to be
able to get that vulnerable, not that you're not already vulnerable,
but like to go all the way into the demons
and the dark of it all that we store that's
so beautiful.

Speaker 3 (04:00):
Literally had to let go and like talk to my
little girl self and tell her, like and talk to her.

Speaker 1 (04:07):
What did you tell her?

Speaker 3 (04:08):
It was something really sad and it was just like
it was so sad and shy's just seeing this, you
know what I mean? And like he did the same thing.

Speaker 1 (04:20):
What was your coping mechanism for your little girl? How
did you cope?

Speaker 3 (04:23):
Well?

Speaker 1 (04:23):
What did you do to protect her so she didn't
have to feel? Well?

Speaker 3 (04:26):
It's funny because like I went back and because she
was like, you need to probably do some solo therapy
for like your She's like, you probably need to like
go do some work on your own. And we did,
we've both done that. But but it was I actually said,

(04:46):
I was like, you're because I was bullied a lot,
like a lot of bullying. And again I'm a doormat
and so I've always been like quiet and reserved or
ways I feel like I've like sorry, I feel like
i've I've something about having kids really make.

Speaker 1 (05:03):
You step into like who mama, lion? Yeah, you're like, I.

Speaker 3 (05:06):
Really give a rats, but tuity what anyone thinks of me,
because now I'm a mom and there's more important things
to laugh than someone's opinion, so other than God's. Like, yeah,
as long as God's telling me I'm doing good.

Speaker 1 (05:16):
And you and your husband are on the same page,
that's exactly it.

Speaker 3 (05:18):
Like I sat the other day and I was like,
I feel like I haven't talked to you in a
long time. God, and I just felt him say you're
a good mom, and I just started bawling. Sometimes you
just like need need to hear it, you know.

Speaker 1 (05:33):
Okay, So what did you tell your little girl's me?
Is it too personal?

Speaker 3 (05:36):
Share? No? I just said the reason that I was
bullied a lot was because I was They called me
miss goody two shoes, like I didn't break the rules
and like I was just like a rule follower and
and and my mom told me my whole life, you're
a good girl, and like she should always say make

(05:57):
good choices. And I literally told or I was like,
you're a good girl, and you are, you are. You
did a good job, and you did a good job,
and you tried.

Speaker 1 (06:06):
You've been trying so hard.

Speaker 3 (06:08):
And like the thing that came out of it was
the therapist actually said she was like do you know what?
She was like, I'm looking at your whole life, and
she was like, and you never followed. And I was like, like,
I'd never thought of that. But like as much as
I was picked on her, bullied or like all this
for for like being good, she was like, you never

(06:30):
followed them, like I never.

Speaker 1 (06:33):
Like you just kind of raced it, raced for it.

Speaker 3 (06:37):
I like I mom told me I was good and
I wanted to be good, and and like, thank goodness
for that foundation because Shane and I were both like
raised to know and love the Lord, and I'm so
thankful for that. But I'd never heard that before in
my whole life. She looked at me and she was like,
you were never a follower, So proud of you. And

(06:57):
there was something about that that was.

Speaker 1 (06:59):
Like, oh, all that hard work really did pay off,
and it is the harder road.

Speaker 3 (07:03):
It is Whoo. I didn't think we'd we've gone to
a lot of places today. We haven't even drink a long.

Speaker 1 (07:10):
I know this is gonna be good. Hannah. When I
was crying in the bathroom this morning, I was like,
thank God it's Hannah, because I got so much to
get into with you, because life ain't easy. You're married
to someone who's in the spotlight, you have a baby
on the way. You went through so much as a
young woman and stood your ground. You trusted God, You've
weathered the storms. But the thing is like sometimes when

(07:30):
you trust God, it's not like, well, it's really hard
and we've gone forever. This should probably be a two
part episode because I'm sure we're at like one hour
and a half, aren't we Okay, Okay, we're fun.

Speaker 3 (07:44):
Okay. It's just so good mine it is. And actually,
I do want to say this just because I want
to say this on like any platform that I'm given.
And again, you know, the first episode that we did
together six years ago, I'll never forget this because I
was talking to you and you asked me a question
the end and I remember sitting there going, it's not

(08:05):
about me, like, none of this is about me, And
that's followed me like since that interview because it's it
isn't about me. None of the things that we're doing
here today are really for us, are they.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
We're sharing all this to let others see the light
right through our story.

Speaker 3 (08:18):
And for me, that is like the hope that we
have in Christ and I want to share that. Like
in in that intensive therapy session that we had, really
what I ended up learning. Do you know you know
Lauren Tomlin.

Speaker 1 (08:34):
Yes, Chris one of the best Christians singers. Laura Tomlin's amazing,
absolutely amazing. She's like anointed, like you, so annoyed.

Speaker 3 (08:41):
And she's and she's so gifted. But we we do
these listening prayers and actually one of the things that
I realized after that therapy session was it was very
similar in that you you're calling out the lie that
you've believed your whole life.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
That is so hard to even know what the light
is sometimes because you're so wrapped up and it you
don't even know it's not you. You think that you
are the lie, but it's not well and you have
to figure it out.

Speaker 3 (09:06):
Yes, And so that sitting down in that setting and
like we're seeing yourself to go.

Speaker 1 (09:11):
Back and find the lie, because that's that is what people.

Speaker 3 (09:15):
Will refuse to do, especially older generations. And I'm not
like generalizing, but I kind of am a lot of
older generations sweep things under the rug. I know that's
how I grew up.

Speaker 1 (09:25):
Well, just because also mental health wasn't a thing to therapy.
It wasn't accessible to talk about it.

Speaker 3 (09:30):
And you sing is fine, and we just don't talk
about it and you.

Speaker 1 (09:33):
Just buckle put your head down and do the work
and buckle up and make it happen. And that's how
they were raised to like to. And now they have
years and years and years and decades of all that
trauma store they don't even know how to crack into it.

Speaker 3 (09:45):
And so that's kind of that's where we came from.
And that's why.

Speaker 1 (09:48):
We're changing in our generation.

Speaker 3 (09:50):
We the our ceiling is our children's floor. So all
the work that we do is actually has nothing to
do with us, but like that's the starting place for
a kids. The healthier we can become, Like that is
the foundation that we are laying for our children to
not have to go and like deal with our stuff.
Does that make sense?

Speaker 1 (10:10):
Because we clear out our own trauma, right, so then
we can be clear clean vessels to help them navigate
their life without putting our stuff on there, that's right,
And then they don't even know that they're just adding
their own trauma to it because they're just navigating our trauma.
So not that we're not going to do something about
the right, because we will, because we will.

Speaker 3 (10:26):
But what that intensive did was it forced us to
sit down and look at places that we had been
unwilling to look at or maybe even had like blacked
out because one of my coping mechanisms is like disassociating.
So some of that stuff, I'm like, oh, I don't
even like sometimes stuff still comes to me, and.

Speaker 1 (10:43):
How did you figure out to put it on there
if you had blacked it out?

Speaker 3 (10:46):
I mean, I was just like brainstorming, and also like Lords,
I was like, Lord, bring anything to me that, like
you know, I need to. And again, some stuff still comes,
like you know, in the middle of the night when
your brain is just rain off and it'll be like
I told say the other day, I was like I
just laid in bed and remembered a whole bunch of
stuff from when I was like a teenager, and like

(11:08):
I forgot all about that and it was horrible.

Speaker 1 (11:11):
But you're just clearing it up.

Speaker 3 (11:12):
Yeah, but I guess that's what like God makes this
in amazing ways, and I guess one of the coping
mechanisms is disassociating, so you don't then when.

Speaker 1 (11:22):
You start healing, it starts coming back up just at
its own pace, yes.

Speaker 3 (11:26):
When it wants to. And then you have to keep
doing the work right, like the work never ends.

Speaker 1 (11:30):
That's the problem. When you do choose to follow God.
It's not like easy, but it's not easy to not
follow God because then your life just gets stuffed down
and buried with all this.

Speaker 3 (11:37):
Trauma like a one and done.

Speaker 1 (11:39):
Oh it's a NonStop constanctification.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
Which means like a constant like can you.

Speaker 1 (11:44):
Clear one level out? And you feel good for a second,
and then it's.

Speaker 3 (11:47):
Like onion, yes, oh yeah, thank God for letting me
continue to grow. But what I wanted to to say
is what I learned from Lauren was identifying the places,
because you're really probably not going to get to the
lie unless you're willing to go and look at some
of the things that hurt you the most and feel them.

(12:10):
I mean, if you're looking at them, you're going to
feel something. And so if you go back to those places.
If you're willing to do that work, you can start
to find the lie in like what you've believed about yourself,
your whole life because of what happened to you, because
of the message that you took away. Even if it

(12:31):
wasn't you, it was your it was a circumstance, but
as a child or a young person, this was the
message you got from it, and then your entire identity,
identity hoping that revolves around like the message that you
took from that.

Speaker 1 (12:45):
And for me, think it's you.

Speaker 3 (12:47):
And for me that was that I'm not chosen because
I would get picked on. I remember someone coming up
to me at one point and being like so and
so said that her party's canceled, and I and I wasn't.
I literally like heard them around the corner being like,
go tell her that my party's canceled because my mom

(13:09):
made me invite her and I don't want her there.
And I'm like talking that this is like you're like
thirteen and fourteen, like you're little. But also I'm thinking
of my nieces right now, and that's their whole world
life shattering. It's their whole world, and so I'm just
thinking of things like that over and over and over,
being cheated on by different boyfriends over and over and

(13:32):
like like just different situations. And the message I took
from all of them was that I'm not chosen. And
it wasn't that I wasn't worthy, It wasn't that, you know,
I wasn't whatever. It was that they didn't choose me.
And I always felt alone and I always felt isolated.
And then I married a man who ended up in
a career that always seemed to come first, and again.

Speaker 1 (13:54):
He felt chosen.

Speaker 3 (13:55):
I felt like he was choosing that over me or
our kids. And so that's what we got called therapy,
was that, like, I just don't feel like I'm chosen,
And like, how do you grapple with that? When your
husband provides for your family and like you will miss
the birthdays and the anniversaries and the holidays because he's
doing the thing to take care of you, but you

(14:17):
just want to feel like he picks you. How do
you grapple with it? I mean, we've done so much work.
You can do the work and he does and he
knows that now because we did that work in front
of each other, right, And so that's kind of the
true is.

Speaker 1 (14:33):
Got intimacy that's as intimate as you can get with someone, and.

Speaker 3 (14:36):
You can bear like your deepest wounds in front of
someone and they actually have this like they're actually seeing
like you in a new light. She didn't know me
before I was twenty three, twenty four years.

Speaker 1 (14:54):
And I know your whole backstory that made you who
you were.

Speaker 3 (14:56):
I mean, he knew the cliff notes that you told him,
but like he's not going to know the thing about
being uninvited to a birthday party, and he's not going
to know that they threw my clothes in a trash
can or in the showers after ball practice so I
couldn't go back to class. Like you know, he's not
gonna know that. Stuff hurts so badly little things I know.

(15:20):
And so you're so strong and brave. I love you
so much. I'm just like, but I'm so proud of you.
You have to go revisit your life. It is so
awful and unbearable sometimes that you have to.

Speaker 1 (15:32):
Because look at where you got with Shay and the
fact that y'all did that together, I know, what a
beautiful marriage. And then he was able to clean up
some stuff in his life. You were able to realize
you had a whole lot that you didn't even know
was there.

Speaker 3 (15:44):
Yeah. Well, and even the drinking thing was like, oh,
you know, you're choosing that even though you know that
that is like triggering me because then you like see triggers.
You do that in therapy too, and you're like, oh,
it's not actually the fight that we're having right now,
it's actually the trigger that takes you all the way
back to like this thing.

Speaker 1 (16:03):
Uh huh right, yeah, exactly, just the post traumatic stress
from the thing that's happening.

Speaker 3 (16:09):
Yes, And honestly, if anyone's listening, don't be afraid of therapy.
And I actually would suggest if you're gonna do it,
find someone that's Christ centered, because everything that we did
in our session they pulled back to God and scripture.
You can do all the self help you want, but
at the end.

Speaker 1 (16:26):
Of the day, it has to be bigger than you.

Speaker 3 (16:28):
If you're not letting God into that place, it's a
band aid on a gaping wound.

Speaker 1 (16:32):
A then to that because at the end of it,
you both have to get to the foundation, which is God.
And then once you get through all of your traumas
that were just put on you, because we get them.
We collect them over our life and we don't even
know we're collecting them. And then you hit this point
when you're whatever, thirty, you and Shae. You hit your marriage,
You hit the babies, hit the career, you hit all
the past stuff that has now piled up so big
that you're drowning in it. You clear it out and

(16:54):
you get to God together and now you get to
truly build from the ground eye marriages, but their songs
are so spot on.

Speaker 3 (17:01):
It's so spot on we could literally like have a
whole conversation and link them and throughout it they are
more self help than they think. So marriage is like
a triangle and God is at the top and the
husband and wife are down here and it just all connects.
And I was just trying to show you, but then
it looks like Illuminati and not only illuminod. That's another
rabbit hole we can get down. Oh God, I know,

(17:23):
but it's a triangle and God is at the top.
And basically, the closer each of us become individually with
in our relationship with the Lord, like the closer we
are together. Right does that make sense?

Speaker 1 (17:34):
Yes? And then you're both not relying on yourself and
your ego and your successes of this world for happiness.

Speaker 3 (17:41):
Think of the think of the term self help self
at the end of the day, like that's a little
bit of like pride or idolization. Like you could go
either way with it. You could be prideful enough to
think that you could fix yourself and heal yourself, or
you could think that you are good enough to like

(18:01):
do the work and that it's again.

Speaker 1 (18:03):
Works based, and it works based.

Speaker 3 (18:07):
Everything in the Bible has to do with faith, right,
and surrender and and that forgiveness that that we get
because it's like the gift of salvation and it all
points back to God like none of its.

Speaker 1 (18:24):
Ultimately, you can do as much self help as you want,
but you're gonna get to a point where it bottoms out.

Speaker 3 (18:28):
And self awareness is awesome and it will help you.
You need it there, You need it, like ask God
for self awareness so you can see your weaknesses. But
you can't fix you right, and a self help book
can't fix you right Like right, these are great tools,
but the only person that can fix you is the
person that made you.

Speaker 1 (18:46):
And you really don't even need God doesn't even fix you.
He just brings you back to your wholeness that you
were reminds you remind you.

Speaker 3 (18:52):
Yeah. He And that's one of the things like Lauren
Tomlin's prayers that we do, the listening prayers, and it's
like God will to you if you ask like who God,
show me who you say I am? God? Show me
how you see me? If you ask those questions to God.

Speaker 1 (19:08):
Let's just say that. Everyone closer, I turn now, will
you just say that for us so we can all say.

Speaker 3 (19:11):
That, Just say, Holy Spirit, I invite you to show
me because the Holy Spirit leads you unto all truth.
God show me how you see me. Give me a
picture or give me a word, bring back a memory,
or God, tell me how you see me. And for me,

(19:35):
he said, you're my daughter, and I chose you. I
chose he said, I chose You said I chose you.

Speaker 1 (19:43):
Oh God, And so like so you've chime that's the
full circle. Or the world may not choose you, but
God has always chosen you.

Speaker 3 (19:53):
He's always chosen me because the world's broken.

Speaker 1 (19:56):
So it doesn't even know how to make correct choices.

Speaker 3 (19:58):
So then it's that full circle. Like you do the work,
you see the trauma, you see the brokenness, that is
the world. Humanity is a fall in place. There's no
way we can negate it, but we can live in
the place of peace and surrender and like God will
bring healing to those moments.

Speaker 1 (20:15):
But you do have to do that full circle.

Speaker 3 (20:17):
Well, you have to do the full circle work.

Speaker 1 (20:18):
And it's exhausting. So many people don't want to get
into it because getting into it is a long journey.
You go straight into the woods. You gotta freaking climb
through the vines. I mean literally, you have a machete.
You're just chopping through it and you think it's never
going to end, and then you do see the light,
but then you get another wood you have to go through.
But it's constant, Yes, but that's the only way you
truly get to who you are and who God is.

Speaker 3 (20:37):
Our marriage intensive was only three days long and Sanna
came out of it and.

Speaker 1 (20:42):
We're like we need it now. Whoa, we need to
not for a year? WHOA?

Speaker 3 (20:47):
And stuff will keep coming up and you just keep working,
like you keep allowing God to take that. Yeah, and
like remind you of whatever it is that he needs
to remind you of, because he will. And I would

(21:08):
say the high like the highest high for Shane and
I right now is now like we've done so much
work and we've been married eight years now, just celebrated
that this month.

Speaker 1 (21:19):
Do y'all had a kid like every other year? Yeah,
we had, y'all been on it, Hannah, we eloped.

Speaker 3 (21:25):
In two thousand.

Speaker 1 (21:26):
Well you didn't mean to, Elope. I'm sorry. This podcast
is the longest podcast of all time. The battery just died.
But now we're getting into this story of eloping, which
you did not mean to. Elope. Hey, he proposed and
opened the doors and then you had a surprise wedding.
Let's not yes you for that.

Speaker 3 (21:40):
He proposed the day that he proposed, and then like boom,
opens the doors and there is my college pastor, my family,
my best friend, and three wedding dresses to choose from
a bouquet, brand new nude high heels, and the photographers
were there.

Speaker 1 (21:57):
How did he know you were just so? I mean,
he just knew that you were ready.

Speaker 3 (22:00):
Well, we were pregnant for one that.

Speaker 1 (22:05):
I love that hand see the good girl got pregnant
out of wedlock. I love that. How did that happen?
With all the rules you followed?

Speaker 3 (22:10):
This is all again like part of that like healing
that we've done, and and like generationally, did.

Speaker 1 (22:17):
You freak out with your track record of getting pregnant
out of wedlock? I feel like that would send you.

Speaker 3 (22:21):
Over the edge. We could go there, because that's probably
the deepest and darkest of our season. Okay, and that's
we could sit here for another four hours. Can you
give me the cliff now, I'm not going to, okay,
but you're willing to share it. But I will say
this just because Shane and I laugh about it now.
But we had looked at rings that spring. Like I
was going through my pictures the other day, and be fair,

(22:43):
I have too many pictures on my phone, but there's
like one hundred and twenty thousand, literally one hundred and
twenty thousand on my phone, and I was going through
and you can go by year, and I literally have
pictures of like just my hand with like bear stones
on them because we had gone to the jeweler and
I was like look at stones for like an engagement ring.

(23:03):
And that was in the spring. And then Mother's Day
we went home to visit my parents, and while we
were in he asked my dad for his blessing, and
eight weeks later, we found out we were pregnant.

Speaker 1 (23:16):
So you were a very excited about this having your
life move forward. But was it a little what did you?

Speaker 3 (23:21):
I mean, it was almost like our life was over right.
I mean he's he was twenty three, are young? No?
He was twenty four and I was twenty five. You
were young, yes?

Speaker 1 (23:33):
And so he are you ready for a baby?

Speaker 3 (23:35):
No? I mean I literally like I was in such shock.
I told his sister first. I I was just like,
I'm not ready.

Speaker 1 (23:45):
I wouldn't have been either. I would have freaked out,
like I'm not.

Speaker 3 (23:48):
Ready for this. So how did you move on to
disown me? And I just couldn't. But the thing is,
we knew we were getting married. I knew he was
the one.

Speaker 1 (23:59):
You knew he was going to be the bother of
your kids, right, just happening way sooner, And I.

Speaker 3 (24:04):
Mean it was just so many things wrapped into one.

Speaker 1 (24:06):
That's a lot of it. And you're also twenty four,
so big, big, big feelings. You've been living your whole
life trying to be perfect and not break the rules,
and now here's the biggest one right that we've been
told about our whole life. That's like, you know, oh oh, Hannah,
but what about God teaching you another lesson about grace?

Speaker 3 (24:21):
Listen, there's so many lessons in it.

Speaker 1 (24:23):
And again surrender again. Hardest thirty years of my life
because I was depressed before I was postpartum depressed, like
all the things, oh man. Relationships with my family weren't
the best. And then Shae was on tour that year
two hundred and fifty shows, the first year that Astra
was born, and so he was gone over three hundred days,

(24:44):
so you have all of the piled on emotions.

Speaker 3 (24:47):
So anyway, alone, we got married when I was that's
some heavy stuff. I was fourteen weeks pregnant when we
did get married, and it was to the point I
remember telling him. I was like, if you're not going
to propose soon, don't bother because I was like, everyone's
going to think we're getting because we're pregnant. Now we
both know different, because you'd already asked Dad's blessing and
we'd already looked rings. However, the perception, the perception, and
it was just like killing me. And so he like

(25:10):
got it together with the help of his sisters. God
blessed his sisters. Coming quitterly Erica texted me because we
were going to dinner, and I knew who was proposing
because he lived in Nashville and he was coming in
for one day, you know, Like I knew he was proposing.
Erica was like, where are your eyelashes? Go to Walgreens
and get for my lashes. So I was like, Okay,
he's proposing that I didn't know, and how special, what

(25:33):
a special way, and he made it so special I
would have been fine with that. I've never been the
girl that play in their wedding, never had big plans.
I just wanted it to be the right man. And
thank you God like for that, and for the family
that I got with it, like my bonus family.

Speaker 1 (25:47):
And just to say everyone again once again, your life
doesn't have to be wrapped up in a pretty package,
because this is not the order you would have done it,
and it probably gave you a lot of anxiety and
stress and shame and whatever because of it. But if
you just can keep trusting God, right.

Speaker 3 (26:00):
He God has got this plan for you. And if
you can just and here's the thing again.

Speaker 1 (26:06):
And thank God you didn't panic and do something that
you would have regret.

Speaker 3 (26:09):
That's what I was gonna say thank God for the
foundation again that are we did grow up in the
Bible belt, we did grow up in church, we did
know right from wrong. We did make mistakes, and then
you took responsibility for it. At the end of the day,
Guess whose fault it is. It's not that precious baby,
Like that baby is a life, and both of us

(26:29):
knew that like that wasn't an option.

Speaker 1 (26:32):
So you knew, Okay, here's the road. I know and
guess that kind of scary. But you're also like, well,
we're doing this.

Speaker 3 (26:38):
Well, yes, And in retrospect, I realized this. The first
year of marriage, I was like, I would I would
have got cold feet. I wouldn't have married him if
we hadn't had this baby. I wouldn't have married him
because I disliked this life so much. What it's just
not for you? Guys, tell me why you dislike it? Well,
it was again that year he was he was gone

(26:58):
the whole.

Speaker 1 (26:58):
Year, gone the whole And it's not ever what you want.
You didn't move to Nashville to be a musician, and
like I kind of was looking for it. You were opposite.

Speaker 3 (27:04):
I was opposite. I was I didn't want anything to
do with it. He was gone, and then he regretted
that he like resented being tied down at that point
because he was and career is taking off.

Speaker 1 (27:16):
Right, so this was an ideal for anyone.

Speaker 3 (27:18):
And then I'm at home with a newborn in postpartum
depression and at.

Speaker 1 (27:22):
Least because you're like I, I didn't even want this life.
I'm sure there are some moments. Listen, And this is
another thing about marriage. I want to say this because
we were both happily married and we have done the work,
but there are seasons when you are literally like this
is so unbelievably hard. I don't know if I can
make it, but you and I'm not talking about someone
being abused and like all that, because that's a whole

(27:44):
different story.

Speaker 3 (27:44):
And I will say Shy and I both got to
the point.

Speaker 1 (27:46):
But sometimes you get to the point you're like, this
is so hard, I'm gonna die.

Speaker 3 (27:49):
Say. We had to say I had to say out
loud to him, like divorce is not an option and
for some reason, and that had never been an option.
But you know, men have their insecurities too, and I
think it took me verbalizing that to him for it
to click to be like.

Speaker 1 (28:04):
Oh okay, And that's how Michael and I are too,
because like, especially after you have that baby, and then
having a baby alone without having these careers that our
husbands have on top of it is enough to send
you into a spiral with your marriage and yourself and
your life and your priorities and everything changes. And then
the husbands are in their career.

Speaker 3 (28:23):
I moved here, I knew no one, I had no friends,
I had no family.

Speaker 1 (28:26):
And you weren't looking for this. You didn't even mean
to be married or have a baby, right.

Speaker 3 (28:29):
It happened so fascinating. Then there we are with a
brand new house and we're like twenty five year olds
and our neighbors are like, where's your mom? When they
let come to the door?

Speaker 1 (28:39):
Were the mom and the jack?

Speaker 3 (28:40):
Like I am. Actually, it's just this bizarre turn of events.
And I spent the next years like, so.

Speaker 1 (28:48):
You're just coming out of this one depression, missus Joyce
hit gets you all peaceful, you're all pieced out and ready,
and now you're into a whole nother whirlwind of another
new hot stakes are way higher in this next one.

Speaker 3 (28:59):
Even in it though, I could still see that, like
I could still see God being like I'm in this.
I again think I would have said no. I think
we would have been engaged, and I think I would
have been like, I don't think I can do.

Speaker 1 (29:14):
This because you're just too young, and it opens.

Speaker 3 (29:17):
Because of everything that came with the career.

Speaker 1 (29:19):
With the career, yes, And.

Speaker 3 (29:21):
So I genuinely, from the bottom of my heart, like
that was such a blessing that God was like I'm
giving you this, baby because y'all are in this, and
I have plans not just for you, but for your kids,
Like you are gonna build. You're gonna like have warriors
for children, and you're gonna build the kingdom, and like
you can't get out of this, like this is your right.
But do you know what comes with Like you get

(29:42):
oil from the pressing, and you get wine from the pressing,
Like you have to go the pressure, the pressure, and
like the crush, Like that is why crush.

Speaker 1 (29:52):
I want to say this about marriage too, because, like
like I said, there are certain situations where you should
you have had that bad relationship that is absolutely not healthy.
You've got to get out like it is cannot stay.
But if you're just in a relationship with a good person,
who you are married to, you are going to have
seasons that are so hard, and.

Speaker 3 (30:10):
If you're probably gonna be the.

Speaker 1 (30:12):
First few years, it's probably gonna be the first few years.
If you bail out in that hard season, you're gonna
miss the fruits that come. Because the fruits fruits that
come if you weather those storms together and do that
hard work, it is like you enter into a holy
garden because you make it through this season that people
don't like. It's not fun. It puts all the pressure on,

(30:34):
and especially like you said, when you have that new baby,
like it's like everything. But if you weather that storm
and you buckle down together and you put God at
the center, it is unbelievable.

Speaker 3 (30:44):
The other side, there's an analogy I was listening to
on a sermon and he was talking about a farmer
and it was either like he either had a vineyard
or like an almond grove, I don't remember, but the
farmer drove a steak through the roots of either the
tree or thee Because apparently if you if you drive
a steak, like a metal steak through the root, like

(31:08):
think of how damaging this is, how painful and broken
it strengthens, It makes the roots grow deeper and and
like there's some benefit to that.

Speaker 1 (31:21):
It's like breaking it probably you have to come back stronger.

Speaker 3 (31:23):
And it would never have unless you drove in like that.

Speaker 1 (31:27):
Nail, that wedge, that pain.

Speaker 3 (31:29):
And in a lot of ways, that's that's kind of
how marriage is. You are, It's I keep referencing clearness.

Speaker 1 (31:35):
This is going to be a two part series probably
for sure. So because we can't stop now, it's so
I feel like we're just in the good part.

Speaker 3 (31:42):
The Gabby Barrett's song raising or growing up Raising you
I just and you.

Speaker 1 (31:47):
Had her on Unexpected your podcast, I did.

Speaker 3 (31:49):
I love her to death? But Shay was we were
twenty four, twenty five, and then we're like we start
our family and then and you weren't ready.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
It takes off, Hannah, you weren't ready for any this.

Speaker 3 (32:00):
Well, I mean you were, but like you weren't preparing
my timeline, your timeline. Yeah, And then.

Speaker 1 (32:07):
Like so you were in that depression for a couple
of years and he's on tour.

Speaker 3 (32:10):
Yeah, and then the Justin Bieber song was about to
hit and when I was pregnant, No, it's gonna get bigger,
and I absolutely panicked.

Speaker 1 (32:17):
Which is crazy because behind closed doors, everyone watching you
would think God's so she's living the dream. She's married
to Shay, the hottest deo in country music. You have
this beautiful baby, another one on the way. You're in
a Justin bieber Viode. I remember all went to Halen
and Justin's wedding. I'm like, Hannah is the coolest of
all the cool like your ice cold, You're so cool.

Speaker 3 (32:36):
Meanwhile, full panic because I was just like I knew
that it would just take them to a different.

Speaker 1 (32:43):
Place, being gone even more right, and like more people
wanting them right. Their bandwidth now got bigger, as far
as more people wanting access to them and your life
now you who's not chosen and your your lie? Now
does it even get less time? Well not that you
hadn't healed that all that.

Speaker 3 (33:00):
Right, Well, it wasn't even that, and I hadn't done
the therapy. Yeah, so I didn't even know that was
an issue for me.

Speaker 1 (33:07):
I don't know yet. I don't even know.

Speaker 3 (33:10):
But my fear was actually had more to do with
you know, to who much is given, much is expected,
and so for me it was just, oh, the platform
is getting bigger. What's gonna come with it, new levels,
new devils kind of a thing.

Speaker 1 (33:25):
Oh snap.

Speaker 3 (33:26):
So that was I was like, oh okay, like, well
gonna be more eyes, Like there's gonna like Satan's gonna
throw some more stuff at us because now like there's
just more.

Speaker 1 (33:36):
There's more levels, more devils.

Speaker 3 (33:38):
That's like a that's like sermons out there. I've listened
to a lot.

Speaker 1 (33:42):
That is so true. Though, It's like with every.

Speaker 3 (33:44):
New level, like Satan's going to step up his game too.

Speaker 1 (33:47):
So what happened when the new level hit? Because I mean,
you don't get at that time, you did not get
bigger than Justin bieber Well and Hayley. They were like
the hottest thing out there. Dan and Shane are the
hottest thing.

Speaker 3 (33:55):
They're the sweetest, Like she I just want to throw
that out later. She is the sweetest. Like we didn't
know each other, and we met on the set and
they invited us to their wedding and I was like, oh,
that is so kind. It was like already kept. The
wedding was like a week later.

Speaker 1 (34:09):
It was like the wedding of the century, I know,
And it was just very kind of them.

Speaker 3 (34:13):
She's the sweetest and like most Sound Earth, but I digress.
It was it was a wild season. It was a
wild season, and it was good.

Speaker 1 (34:21):
What did you learn in that season?

Speaker 3 (34:24):
I mean, so I was. I was like in a
new place we had moved. I was in a place
where I was really digging in, like really digging into
the Word and studying it. And I was like finally
coming out of the season we were in with Ashure
being new and then I was pregnant with Aims and
I was like, Okay, I felt like I was getting

(34:45):
my feet under me. I was really studying really in
the Word, and I was asking God, like show me things.
I was like God was giving me dreams, like like
my spiritual life was coming alive. But I was actually
praying at that time for people to enter Shay's life
because men need men, amen, Yes, they do, and need

(35:06):
good men. Men need men who will hold them accountable
and pour into them even if they think they don't.
And it's like another level of like masculine strength to
be vulnerable in front of another dude exactly.

Speaker 1 (35:20):
And women are so good at sharing and coming together.

Speaker 3 (35:22):
And at that point, I'm like, I've always considered myself
hyper independent. I don't need anyone. Now I know it's
because I was like, well, I wasn't chosen, so I
don't need anyone. So I was like, I'm good, but God,
can you please send someone for my husband's good he.

Speaker 1 (35:35):
Needs I'm fine, I'm totally fine over here.

Speaker 3 (35:37):
Can you send people for him?

Speaker 1 (35:39):
Please?

Speaker 3 (35:41):
And God is so good. Within two weeks of me
like on my knees, on my face praying this, there's
a series of events and I'm gonna have to write
a book, but a series of events that was just
like boom boom boom. God just dropping like dude after
dude after dude, like good dudes into his That was
like a lifeline and like they're still in Chay's life.

(36:04):
And you know, in this industry, that's hard, Like it's
hard for guys that are in it to meet other
men who are successful, respect respectable, love the Lord, have integrity, ammen,
and are not going to suck your husband into the
vortex of like I don't know, like I call it

(36:28):
the hamster wheel of just like more success. What can
we do? Who can we meet? Who can we like
there's a motivation, you know, that's that's just not like
godly relationship and fellowship with other good men and God
was bringing those people right into his life. Wow, like undeniably.

Speaker 1 (36:46):
Wow. So did that start changing everything? Yeah? Really? Yeah,
so that started anew and that's when y'all started doing
the work together because now he was starting to open
up to the work because he was inspired by the
good men. Like you said, many a wife can tell
you something all day long, and you're going to be
the example and you're gonna you're going to influence him.
But to have a man that like another man looks
up to, yeah, is priceless.

Speaker 3 (37:06):
Changes everything. And there's nothing I could have done in
that situation other than pray for that for my husband.
And I say this, I've got it pinned to the
top of my Instagram. But it's like, never ever like
think that the power of prayer is not like one
of your number one weapons. Because prayer changes things. It
moves things. God will move in the unexpected, God will

(37:27):
move in the natural and the supernatural, Like God will
shift atmospheres to meet prayers, especially when it is in
alignment with his own word and what he wants for you. Yes, Like,
it's not like I was asking for my husband to
meet people that were gonna make his career better. I
was like, bring good godly men into my husband's life.
God wants that. I know God wants that.

Speaker 1 (37:50):
So wow did And now how are things?

Speaker 3 (37:54):
Oh my gosh, I mean they're really busy. We've had
a really really really crazy year. Year's been wild.

Speaker 1 (38:00):
What's and wild?

Speaker 3 (38:01):
I'll probably I started writing yesterday and I was like,
I'm just there's just gonna be a chapter in my
book and it's just gonna be our whole summer about
all these things because it's been wild. We did get
robbed in June. Sure at home.

Speaker 1 (38:13):
The house you live in now, not our house, but
all of our cars outside. Yes, that's very violating.

Speaker 3 (38:19):
It is, and it's the second time that's happened.

Speaker 1 (38:21):
At the same time that was just like is it
because people know you live there?

Speaker 3 (38:24):
Or is it just that our whole neighborhood was hit
and terrifiz neighborhood. But we don't have gates and we
have like big yards. That's watching. Our dogs were gone,
neighbors dogs were gone. They went on vacation. And I
just happened to have all of my jewelry out in
the car because we've been traveling and I had it
in a travel case. So they took like twenty thousand
dollars worth of story, but it was it was fine

(38:47):
because it's all insured and the boys were excited that
we got to file a police report. Are coming and
we also it was a good learning lesson because Shae
and I were like, boys, it's just stuff, literally, it's
just stuff. I don't care. We're fine, y'all are fine.
We can't replace people, we can replace things. Yeah, and

(39:08):
like we truly don't care other than it being like
pretty violating, right, But that was just like it was
a domino effect all summer. And I really won't go
into all of it, but I expect our life is
wild and God is so evident in it.

Speaker 1 (39:23):
How do you feel? And we can start trying to
wrap up the part two of this podcast just staying
the Cell Loud. We were having a two part podcast
with Hannamony. First half we get into so many great things.
Second half we just take them all the way, all
the way down to the bottom of ocean. We cover
the Gamut. I love it, though part one of them
are too. It's so love I couldn't stop this combo
because it's so good. It is like therapy and it's
just so real life. And you're such a woman that

(39:45):
like you're you're so all of it. You're so beautiful,
you're so kind, you're so smart, you're so wise, you're
so grounded in your faith. You have this rock star husband,
you have this beautiful family. So like there's a lot
that is so absolutely mesmerized about you. So for you
to go into the depths of your life and relate,
I'm an open book, relate on being a human. It's

(40:06):
so powerful. I'm just so grateful that you would share
all this with me.

Speaker 3 (40:09):
Well again, it's like six years ago when we sat
down and I sat there with that revelation of it
isn't about me. It's never been about me. It's not
even about us or like anything that like we're doing
here today. It's like all I can do is like
share what God has done in my life and in
our marriage and in my husband's life, and pray that
that is an encouragement and a hope and maybe point

(40:32):
someone like towards the thing that's going to heal them
truly and not just like self help. Slap that mandate
on and that's that's.

Speaker 1 (40:39):
God ad you so he can fix you, bring you
back to who you are.

Speaker 3 (40:43):
That's right, not fix you, ye.

Speaker 1 (40:44):
Because we don't need fixing. We've just been damaged by
the world. Who we are is perfect. We just have
to remember that's right. Okay, So how are you and
Shaye together? Now? What do y'all do to make sure
you stay in check? Like, because y'all have done all
this work, You've gone through all these life changes, you
have four babies. Now he obviously has leveled up in
his career, hit this new level of people watching him.

Speaker 3 (41:02):
You felt that that was the Voice again. It was
kind of like the same thing when they got on
the Voice because I was like.

Speaker 1 (41:07):
No, because they're judges on the freaking Voice. That's like
international and I was like, oh, now that's got be recognized.

Speaker 3 (41:15):
Also, it was really funny.

Speaker 1 (41:16):
Have they done their season yet or is that coming? Yeah?

Speaker 3 (41:18):
I know it came out.

Speaker 1 (41:19):
I do not watch TV. If it's not bluely you're
on Disney Channel, I don't watch it.

Speaker 3 (41:22):
Full disclosure, we'd never watch The Voice until or on it.
He was on it.

Speaker 1 (41:26):
Yeah, probably a great family show though honestly, it is
so fun and it was so fun and it's like
right up Shay's alley and as fun as a wife
to watch her husband do the thing that well, he's
got that personality.

Speaker 3 (41:37):
He's so funny. God made him to do it. And
I'm like, this is so because here's the thing. I
know that God made him to sing, but there's just
so much to him and he's so gifted that I
love that the world is getting to see another piece
of him, which is his humor and his heart and
like his his talent and like loving people because he
loves people and I love that about him. But the

(41:58):
more you heal in your marriage and where you do
work in your marriage. So I talked about that resentfulness
that we both had towards each other. We've done so
much work that now we're so freed up to fully.
Like back in the day, I would be home with
a newborn, sleep deprived, and he'd be like, oh, well,
we went to this theme park today, or I golfed

(42:20):
the number two golf whatever in the world. And on
an off day, while you're on a comparing for tour,
or we're on the beach today, or we're in Hawaii and.

Speaker 1 (42:29):
Literally like you're like I'm twenty five.

Speaker 3 (42:31):
Every weekend, maybe your husband is just like telling you
the fun things that he's doing on his day off
and you're like, oh, day off would be nice, wasn't it.
So there's that season.

Speaker 1 (42:42):
Yeah, there is that season, and every new mom just
know when you hit that season. It's normal. Yeah, it's
completely normal if your husbands a rock star. It's a
little bit more.

Speaker 3 (42:49):
Amplified that he's touring, yeah, not.

Speaker 1 (42:52):
Doing all these extravagant, amazing things.

Speaker 3 (42:54):
But the resentment part, there's probably gonna be a hair
of that somewhere. I think that that's.

Speaker 1 (42:58):
Probably very normal, So don't freak out right.

Speaker 3 (43:02):
But the beautiful part is we have done that work
and our seasons do change and now, and he's always
been a champion for me. He's always been my cheer leader.
He's always encouraged me to pursue anything that he'll even
call out things he tells people all the time and
this is so embarrassing, but he's like, Hannah, it's such
an artist. She's a phenomenal artist. She's just like you

(43:23):
wouldn't even believe. And I'm like, will you stop telling
people this?

Speaker 1 (43:26):
Like, just tell us on the paint room though he
put it you he wants you to have a paint room.
You'll have a house and there's a whole room for painting. Yes,
and spatter paint.

Speaker 3 (43:33):
What page is it? He's like, you have to have
like we were gonna do an addition and he's like,
but you have to have a paint room. We have
to build our paint room.

Speaker 1 (43:39):
You're like, Noah and uh the notebook when she's painted
for Ali and Noah, you're allied, he's Noah, Yes, It's
like it's gonna be hard, but we're gonna do it.
We're gonna love each other forever, and we're gonna fight,
but it's gonna be great.

Speaker 3 (43:52):
Its gotta be. It's also that meme that it's like,
I don't know, she doesn't know. You're Alli and he's Noah, Yes, my.

Speaker 1 (43:58):
God, you're the notebook. You're the real life notebook.

Speaker 3 (44:01):
We are. I love it, but it is. It's been
fun because we're in a season now where he can
be gone. And yes, we've both been holding our breath
for tour to start because we know it's it's really hard.
And we sat down right before he left the day
he was leaving for tour, and we were like, oh,
neither of us have talked about it because we're both
internalizing our stress.

Speaker 1 (44:21):
Just for today, avoiding It's just like at.

Speaker 3 (44:23):
This point in the game, we know our roles, we
know our jobs, his job team, right, we're fully one.
We are a team. I'm gonna hold down the foret.
I'm gonna make sure our babies are happy and healthy
and that our routine is stable, and that Daddy. They
know that daddy's gone and that he hates to miss you,
and that's that he's working hard to take care of us.
And you are on the road, and your sacrifice is

(44:46):
that you are missing time with your babies and your family,
and you're missing things in first days of school and
first whatever's with the baby. And that's a sacrifice in itself.
Like we can both see the sacrifice on each end.
He can see the hard work that I do the
sleepless night. It's like the early.

Speaker 1 (45:00):
Morning, full full court press with just you and three
and a half babies.

Speaker 3 (45:05):
And we do have help during the week, which.

Speaker 1 (45:06):
Is good, Thank goodness. You would die with that.

Speaker 3 (45:08):
I wouldn't be here, but that is probably Like, it's
just so exciting that now we're fully a team. We're
fully integrated, transparent, We are transparent. We have learned how
to communicate better our needs congratulations.

Speaker 1 (45:24):
Which is everything communication secret, doing the work in communication,
hands down secret.

Speaker 3 (45:29):
If you can't fix anything, if you're not vitalizing the thing.

Speaker 1 (45:32):
That needs to be worked on, Yes.

Speaker 2 (45:34):
Yeah, yeah, I can't fix what you can't acknowledge.

Speaker 3 (45:46):
But it's fun because we're in a season now where
we're dreaming together. And I've never been a dreamer. Shae
has pulled that out of me. I grew up like
looking like just enough to get by will beef okay,
like I grew up in rule America. I don't want
to say poverty mentality, but kind.

Speaker 1 (46:03):
Of like just enough to get mentality.

Speaker 3 (46:05):
And it was never like I never dreamed big. I
never dreamed of anything. I just wanted to, like find
a job.

Speaker 1 (46:11):
Miss Arkansas's pretty big.

Speaker 3 (46:12):
But yes, you didn't dream of that, you just kind
of fell into it that, I mean, God made that happen.
And so Shane, all these years, I've watched him in
his whole family, the whole family streamers.

Speaker 1 (46:22):
They're all dreamers, they're all.

Speaker 3 (46:23):
Dreamers, and so I've just watched them build like this,
and his dad's an actual builder and his sister is.
Both of his sisters like are creative. Gabby you know,
is like such an artist and a creator, and Erica
has a brokerage and like markets and they just like
dream up. They have a community that they've built. We've
all done it together as a family. We've got like

(46:45):
airbanb's and like it's kind of like Seaside but in
Fort Smith, Arkansas. And it's been so fun because Shane
and I have got to like design the floor plans
and I got to like do the finishes basically, you know,
have like my internal HGTV like a moment where I'm
designing all of the airbnb's.

Speaker 1 (47:06):
Ill had a show I'll die for it you as
a family show. Oh my gosh, she and his whole family.

Speaker 3 (47:12):
Well, we've been approached, I say we. Eric has been approached,
but all y'all doing it together as the Oh my god,
it would be It's fun.

Speaker 1 (47:19):
Gold.

Speaker 3 (47:19):
It would be fun because it wouldn't feel like work
because we just love being around each other and we
love dreaming.

Speaker 1 (47:25):
Person Now every character personality is covered.

Speaker 3 (47:29):
Oh for days, It's like Duck Dynasty. But I don't know.
Building together. The name of it is like from the
ground up, you know, stud it and see yeah, Mic
drop this is happening.

Speaker 1 (47:41):
This will be happening now that this is happening soon. Okay,
so y'all are already doing it, so you might as
well record it and gift people with this treasure.

Speaker 3 (47:47):
No, we we have actually talked about it, which is
why I'm like throwing out that name. But we wouldn't
do that because it's I don't know if it's trademarked.
I don't know how that still works.

Speaker 1 (47:55):
Well, it's not a perfect demand. I'm here for it.
All is very it's all very divine.

Speaker 3 (48:00):
What I'm saying is I'm a dreamer. Now they've graduation, welcome.

Speaker 1 (48:04):
Are you loving it? You got tears in your eyes?
I see tears in your eyes.

Speaker 3 (48:09):
Just fun when you what do we love about being
a dreamer? I just love that I'm doing it with
people that I love and it's our family and we're
building like legacy. It's not Shane out to this point
where he's like, we've done all the things, We've got
all the awards, we have a big house. We're you know,
we've done it. We've made it according to the world.
But like, what more could you want than like home

(48:33):
and family and building your legacy, like there's nothing more
like that is what God wants for us, Like that
is what God wants for us. And so I guess
that's why we're on baby number four. And I'm like,
like we're.

Speaker 1 (48:46):
Just we're doing it having Please tell me you're having
a girl.

Speaker 3 (48:50):
We know yet, Okay, I'm excited.

Speaker 1 (48:55):
You're such a queen, I know.

Speaker 3 (48:59):
And I'm gonna let Shay handle like the announcement because
he's so funny that I'm like, we've got to do
something funny or fun because he's so fun.

Speaker 1 (49:08):
Just so you know, Michael is one of four and
he was the fourth boy, and he was supposed to
be a family's girl. Okay, but he's also look at
him just the joy I love that.

Speaker 3 (49:18):
I love that. I'll tell you after the show. How's
that an old teaser? Okay, will it be a girl
or oh boy, I'll come back to announce, please do
that would be great? Yes, but we do know, but
it is like we're just fortunate enough to be We're
so young, where he's thirty two. The fact that you
have lived all this and accomplished just to go back

(49:39):
so many lives when you're only thirty two and thirty
three and you're already on your fourth kid.

Speaker 1 (49:44):
You've already he's already won like three Grammys. You've already
done all this self help work, evaluation, storyboard your life,
clean out the freaking gutters, clear the pipes, let's start fresh.
And now you're just starting to build your life with
the dreams at this level. I mean the fact God
did push all together for a reason because you have
such the foundation, I'm sorry, the ground up. That song
is perfect. You have your building from the ground up

(50:06):
now based on great foundation, and you're this young with
all this that you've accomplished, and you're this team in God.
What a powerful thing, and now you have this whole
life ahead of you to like do God's work together
on this level that people can see you and you
can influence and be the light. It's really freaking powerful, Hannah.

Speaker 3 (50:24):
It's pretty.

Speaker 1 (50:25):
It's you feel scared that you've been so called what
we it's and then we're gonna wrap up. I'm sorry,
I'm going forever. This has to be.

Speaker 3 (50:33):
Will have me back again?

Speaker 1 (50:34):
We can stop with you, I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 (50:36):
So what Shana do? This is our little treat And
this just tells you that you've seen the memes where
it's like you've you've reached, like you skipped middle aged
and you just went straight to the grandma Hoe. Okay,
that's where we are.

Speaker 1 (50:48):
You're straight in the grave, but yet you have the
body of the middle age of the young person, so
you're crushed in the game.

Speaker 3 (50:54):
We do what we call FPS porch sitting you and Shae,
yes you'll FP.

Speaker 1 (51:00):
I have you like text each other and be like
FPS and ten.

Speaker 3 (51:02):
We literally literally see you out. I'll be in the
playroom and he'll be like SPS FPS, And sometimes the
boys will be like, should we front port sit because
they know that we say it, and it's so cute.
We have rocking chairs in the front and it's and
so we'll just go out there and NPS and the
kids always know like we're trying to just catch a second,
you know. And the kids are like with their face

(51:24):
shut up against the glass and you know, licking it
and we can see him in there because it's right
by the playroom, so we can see them like launching
themselves off of furniture. But we're like, it's fun. We're
just out youre FPS and we're just frontboart sitting and dreaming,
just dreaming dreams.

Speaker 1 (51:40):
Do you know that I heard if a couple spends
ninety minutes a week are talking. Michael Peterson, He's I
feel like he's pretty smart.

Speaker 3 (51:47):
I do too.

Speaker 1 (51:47):
I know. I feel like if he says or Geary Breca.
I don't know him yet, but there's certain people when
they drop some like wisdom, like amen.

Speaker 3 (51:54):
Yeah, but if you on the same algorithm, maybe I
think we are am I following me.

Speaker 1 (51:58):
You're falling because I'm feeling what you're feeling. Same with Michael.
We have we do. We call it his office, Hanks,
because he has this office. It's kind of like the basement. Yeah,
we call the think tank. And he'll always be like,
you don't come down because we just dream. We dream too.
Sonny will go to sleep. She sleeps in the bed
with us, so like half the time I fall asleep
and we don't think tanks. So because I'm like half
the time I'm fall asleep at eight thirty with her,

(52:18):
but the other chap half I'm like getting up out
of bed and like think tanking and we just sit
down and we dream and we talk about life, and
we visualize his life in my life, and we talk
about like if we're in the middle of some traumas
or pain, we go through all that and work it
out and sort it out. And then if we need to,
you know, just like handle it, go through it and
clear it out. So we constantly are clearing out the

(52:39):
pipes so we can be clean and efficient.

Speaker 3 (52:41):
I think that's why we we always stress so much.
Don't not stress, but like internalized before tour season starts because.

Speaker 1 (52:47):
It's ninety nothing ps ing and it happens so much.

Speaker 3 (52:49):
We don't. We don't, and he's gone at least four
days a week, if not five, just depending on it,
and then becomes home.

Speaker 1 (52:54):
He has to recover right and physically.

Speaker 3 (52:56):
He literally comes home school has just started in so
it's basically like us holding our breath for three months.

Speaker 1 (53:03):
And then a big long FPS and.

Speaker 3 (53:06):
Then and then when he comes home after tour, which
is and you know, I'm not counting down or anything,
but like it's mid September and I can't wait because
then it's kind of like a catchup of the last
three months.

Speaker 1 (53:17):
And that's probably the time you get pregnant.

Speaker 3 (53:20):
No, we always have. We always have our babies in
like January, so apparently it's around that Mother's Day Mark, Oh,
we do not plan this either, and literally, like this
baby is also due in January?

Speaker 1 (53:34):
Are they all in January?

Speaker 3 (53:37):
Abram and Asher are and then me and Ames are
in February? So when Shay December twenty seventh?

Speaker 1 (53:42):
So close? All like, I'll have a birthday season, so
many birthdays, Hannah. I love you.

Speaker 3 (53:48):
It's a fun house. I call it a frat house.

Speaker 1 (53:50):
Do you love being the only girl?

Speaker 3 (53:52):
I am the queen?

Speaker 1 (53:53):
You are the queen, And I've always been.

Speaker 3 (53:55):
Like a tomboy because, like I said, I played all
the sports.

Speaker 1 (53:57):
So this is perfect, This is pretty like good.

Speaker 3 (54:00):
Can you believe God knew what he was doing?

Speaker 1 (54:02):
Sucker? He gave you three maybe four, We don't know.
We'll see the baby reveal, boys and the ultimate play
made of a husband. And you're the queen, which you
can handle because you know how to be a miss usay,
and you know how to like wear the crown gracefully
and perfectly with all the love and dignity in the world.
And now you have these boys who are in love

(54:22):
and awe forever. Even if they hit eight and then
move on to dad, You're still the queen of their life.

Speaker 3 (54:26):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (54:26):
Yeah, just to go back to that first part of
our conversation about like eight hundred years ago.

Speaker 3 (54:29):
Keep people around me that are like no, no, Like
my friends still love their moms and go back to
them all the time and they're grown, and I'm like,
keep telling me this is it? Really that makes me sad.
I'm hope we're gonna have to keep having babies.

Speaker 1 (54:42):
So well you keep popping them out.

Speaker 3 (54:44):
Well, I don't think this is our last baby.

Speaker 1 (54:46):
Four is quite a bit Hannah, force of lots.

Speaker 3 (54:50):
The outnumber.

Speaker 1 (54:50):
You're completely out numbered. Now you just threw your hands
in the here.

Speaker 3 (54:53):
I'm going to pitch this to anyone out there that
as two kids, and I'm shameless, but I'm like, just
have the third kid. The third baby breaks. I'm thinking
to you that, like you're like, I don't need to
have control. Everything's fine. That third baby is really like
it mellows you like nothing else. Well, you've got to
just have the three. You've already got two, Like.

Speaker 1 (55:12):
Seriously, just have the third.

Speaker 3 (55:14):
I've never met a third baby. That's not like the
most chill. I'm the third baby chased the third baby.
We're both the babies.

Speaker 1 (55:20):
Okay, but you weren't necessarily chill, because remember you were
trying so hard to be perfect, like you had a
high standard. You were living till I say chill.

Speaker 3 (55:26):
I was like so good and quiet and like mellow,
I'm laid back.

Speaker 1 (55:31):
Yeah, all this thing right? Can I I freaking love you?
This was like such a healing conversation.

Speaker 3 (55:37):
Not wait six years.

Speaker 1 (55:38):
I think we had six years of ketchup that we
just had to like go through right now.

Speaker 3 (55:41):
Probably gonna see you at the Hairslon in a couple
of weeks. I honestly have appointments.

Speaker 1 (55:44):
The last me too. The last time I saw you
were the Hairslon or the Harris and Foil, and we
started getting into it. I'm like, we need to do
a podcast immediately. It's been so long. Clearly we had
so much to get through.

Speaker 3 (55:53):
So much. We could probably keep going, but we won't.

Speaker 1 (55:55):
We won't. We'll wrap it up because this is probably
a great two hour stopping point. I know both the
cameras were full, and hey, how's it going over their
casey done?

Speaker 3 (56:02):
Good?

Speaker 1 (56:02):
Everyone good? Great? Morgan great? Okay, twenty percent battery crush, Hannah.
This was so this was this was so much for me,
like it was so cathartic too.

Speaker 3 (56:15):
It was sometimes you just need to like relive your
own life.

Speaker 1 (56:18):
I know, yes, amazing. Ill was wrap up with Leave
your Light and then we sit around for like a
ten minute burning question session because to go pee though. Okay, yeah,
because you are pregnant. How far long are you?

Speaker 3 (56:30):
I think tomorrow will be eighteen weeks? Girl, Hannah, I
should stand up and show you all my pregnant pirate.

Speaker 1 (56:36):
Yeah, I would like to say it. We'll do a
little fashion show. Okay, leave your Light open ended, just
some inspiration. What do you want people to know?

Speaker 3 (56:46):
Just be encouraged that God does have a plan for you.
Like I said, he knew you, informed you in your
mother's womb. He knew you before the foundations of the world,
which means like before he even planned making the world,
he planned into you, and he knew you, and he
knew the family you'd be born into. He knew the time,

(57:06):
like the year that you'd be born into. Like we're
not here in the eighteen hundreds, we're not here in
the fifteen hundreds, like we're here right now. And it's
because there's something that God, there's something in you that
God knows the world needs right now. And God doesn't
make mistakes. And God also doesn't compare what he creates.
That's a Bob Golf quote. I wish I could take credit,
but I can't.

Speaker 1 (57:27):
Everything's so just as equal creation.

Speaker 3 (57:29):
To just just know that, like you are fearfully and
wonderfully made, and it's for a time and a purpose,
and so you it's fine to feel all the things,
and it's okay to be in the valleys, but you're
not in the valley alone and life may not go
according to plan, and it probably won't. And that's why
you know, have my podcast Unexpected because you can always

(57:55):
look back twenty twenty and see where God was in
the thing, in the mass, in the dark and the broken.
And I just want to encourage anyone out there that
might be in the middle of that that God doesn't
make mistakes. You're here for a reason.

Speaker 1 (58:10):
Your pain and trauma will be used.

Speaker 3 (58:12):
That's absolutely correct. Your mess will become your message like
all of those inspirational quotes that you hear, but it's true,
Like I'm living, breathing a testimony that God is good.
He will turn all things for the good to those
who love Him and are called according to his purposes
and just if nothing else, cling to him, cling to

(58:33):
his words, see what it says, because because like that
is the ultimate truth, That is the ultimate light. Like
I know people say follow your truth, speak your truth,
but honestly that is hogwashed me. I'm like, the only
truth is what God says it is.

Speaker 1 (58:49):
And get to the point where you can actually hear
God speaking and then it's not this fire and brimstone
where you're like gonna go to hell, but it's like God.
You can hear and feel God and you're guided right,
and it's gentle and loving. Yeah, but you gotta do
the hard work. But you said you've got to do
the hard work.

Speaker 3 (59:02):
And it's also like sometimes when Christians say things, it
might offend you, but it's better to receive an offense
from a friend. The Bible literally says that than from
a kiss from the enemy, like think of Judas. Sometimes
people that love you enough to say something to you
say it because they love you and they want to
call out the better part of you that they know

(59:24):
is in there. And so I don't even know.

Speaker 1 (59:27):
I love that, No, I love that. Hannah. You're amazing.
Your podcast Unexpected is amazing You're an incredible mom wife,
You're a partner, a contributor to this light force that
we need in the world. You're just such a bright light.
And thank you for coming on in like having this
or having an amazing conversation. And now you're gonna stick
around for just a quick little burning question segment after

(59:47):
you peek and wait.

Speaker 3 (59:48):
Thanks for doing what you do, because you have truly
been a trailblazer. Like you you jumped into this, you
dreamed it up, you started doing it and pursuing it,
and I mean it's pretty bold. Like you had people
on your podcast, You've had people from all walks of life,
from all kinds of like corners of the world and

(01:00:08):
all kinds of like success metrics, and you are not
afraid to just jump in. And I think so many
people have seen that have been encouraged by it, who
have been entertained by it. And you're a mom too,
and you've gone through so much too, and look where
it's brought us.

Speaker 1 (01:00:26):
That is so kind, Hannah, and I really appreciate that
and receive that, and thank you.

Speaker 3 (01:00:30):
I just love you and I just love you too.
This is awesome.

Speaker 1 (01:00:34):
Let's do it. Let's be okay,