October 9, 2023 • 46 mins
This week on GET REAL Podcast...LISA TUCKER CUMMINS!
LISA is a friend, mother, singer, songwriter, mental health advocate, and soul like no other.
She is the co-founder of Tiny Prime (mom/dad duo) and co-creator of their upcoming project, “Rufus & Bea”.
IN THIS EPISODE, we talk:
• The power of music
• Promoting children’s mental health
• Managing your feelings starting at a young age
• Her musical journey and relationship with fame
“Rufus & Bea” is out in the world TOMORROW! You can pre-save it, HERE!
Listen to LISA TUCKER CUMMINS on GET REAL Podcast...NOW!
Connect with LISA:
InstagramTiny Prime: InstagramRufus & Bea: InstagramTiny Prime on Spotify
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Adam, Ada, Adam.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Carol Lone, she's a queen.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
Talking, so she's getting really not afraid to feel the
episode and so just let her flow.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
No one can do we quiet. Carl Lone is so Caroline.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
I am so excited to be here today with my
friend Lisa.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
Tucker commins, I'm happy to be here with my friend
Caroline cutbirth Hobby, Hella. I got the middle name.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Okay, okay, what's up? Oh a lot?
Speaker 2 (00:46):
You know? I am currently launching a company with my husband.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
How's that going off? Started so much over the pandemic. Yes,
you guys went hard over the pandemic.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
We did, you know? We moved from LA to Nashville.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
And how was that? Because you were in the Great
Migration from California. It's literally like people in the old
days would have been wagons with their mules just come
in our way. I mean literally, I feel like the
whole all of California migrated.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
I feel like they did. But I still like had
no friends when I got here, So I don't know
how that happened. But yeah, we did it with our
two year old at the time, and like a six
week old puppy Golden Retriever it was madness. But we
drove across the country with them, and how was that?
It was beautiful?
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Was it like the Great Adventure?
Speaker 2 (01:36):
It was crazy because you know at the time, like
everyone was still so afraid and nobody knew what was happening,
but it was. It was an adventure, it really was.
And we sang so much.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Musical family Ryan too, right.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
You know, he did not have music growing up, like
really in his house, but he sings all the time.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
He loved it.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Like before we had kids, like he would say about
make makeup songs about anything and everything, food, getting into
the car, washing our face at night, like he just singing.
He just sings joyful health. He makes it so joyful.
And then once we had kids.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Music makes it joyful too.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Oh my gosh, it really does. I think music, like
we always say, like music is this ancient technology that
like can be harnessed for so many things. It helps
you remember things, truly, Like it's great at like reminding
you to do things. Yes, it's how we connect. You
can connect through emotion.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
And drive a life lesson home, Oh my gosh, like
y'all's album he made Rube Simbie, I mean driving Life
Lessons home for children. It's truly it can like impact
so quickly and effectively.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
It is so powerful. It is so powerful. And when
we first started, you know, these songs, we never had
the intention of recording them or making this album or
starting this company. But it was after you know, a
couple of years of this just being in our family
and these songs just being a part of our everyday life.
(03:08):
And I remember I was doing I was doing a
project with our oldest thought he was five now Alden,
and we were doing a project and I mess something
up and I was like a little frustrated, and I
remember him singing one of our songs back to us,
and I was like, oh, like, okay, he's not just
like listening to these songs, he is like internalizing them,
flying them in the correct feeling, flying them. It was.
(03:31):
It was mind blowing, and it was like, okay, so
this is kind of a thing. Maybe this can like
be helpful to other people. And so we decided to
create all of these characters to kind of cement the
lessons because I mean, you know, as a parent, like
if you are asking your child, like if you're talking
to Sonny and you're asking her to talk about how
(03:52):
she's feeling about a particular thing.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
It can be hard, yes, And I mean.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
If it's hard for adults to like have that pressure
on them to to express their feelings in a in
like a given moment, and so the characters really help
kids have these conversations without feeling the pressure of being
the center of it.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
I mean, I still, like you said, I still have
trouble getting my full feelings out and not being not
associating my entire existence with a feeling. You know, It's
like it's even as adults, we weren't taught that. At
least it wasn't mainstream back in the day. Mental health
Phou show was not mainstream back in the day. You know,
everything was tucked and stuffed and just move on and
work hard and put your head up and do the
(04:31):
best they can.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Cry, get over that feeling and move on.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
Yes, just stuff it and it will then it will
magically disappear.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Exactly wrong, exactly, it just is.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
It just festers inside of you and creates these core
memories that you come back to when you get triggered
and you do the same behavior and you obsessed about it.
I'm not speaking for here, can.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
You tell girl, you're not alone like to learn that.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
As a kid, and that's what y'all are doing. You're
just like, let me teach you that you are not
your full feeling as a kid. It right, Let me
explain to you what it is and how to identify
it and work with it and not like freak out.
So tell me about the characters. Who are they?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I mean, like like to what you just said, Like,
these are like muscles as important as like flexing as
your physical muscles. You know, these muscles need to be
flexed in this early early childhood development.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Stage and the things we're most scared of. So we
want to run from them totally.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
And like we my husband and I, like we are
not like we don't have it figured out, you know,
we don't claim to. But at the same time, like
these are things that we feel like we need to
hear now, Yeah, and so we want to share those
with our kids for them so that they can start
flexing those muscles now.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
So they don't have to do years of undoing all
the things they learn. They can just start with the
right knowledge to then you don't have to do therapy
the whole first half of your life.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
You know, that's right.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
I love that, and God bless everyone, and everyone's doing
the best they can, but no one had the tools.
That's why I literally am so appreciate to you guys,
and when people come out with tools and books that
have tools in them, so we all can just like
skip this very messy part in the middle where we
mess ourselves up, where we mess our kids up. It's
all accidental. Right, let's go and get some core good foundation.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Definitely, definitely, and they're really like these these books. Our
first book will come out in the spring, and you know,
every song on the album pairs.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
With a book. It's a lot of work.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
It's oh my gosh, did a lot of work.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
It's and you have like animated pictures. Is there like
videos to go with it too?
Speaker 2 (06:33):
There there will be, there will be. Yeah, it's so
many different parts, like moving parts, and we're really just
figuring it out as we go. But like the beauty
of it, Like obviously we've put a lot of work
into it, but like given the the you know, being
(06:53):
for children, like you can't take yourself too seriously. It
just makes it fun and so we get to like
have fun. Even when we were recording the album, we
recorded with this amazing producer here in Nashville, Jordan Hamlin,
and she has this beautiful studio called Moxie and it's
on this land and we would bring our kids.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
And you love that that you can bring your kids.
I hate it when I have to separate and like
it's an adult only or you have to leave your kids.
It's so much more amazing when the kids get to old.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
My gosh. And they were a part of it. I
remember us going to the studio one day and we
were listening to one of our demos for one of
the songs, and our son, Alden, he was like, you know,
I think this could use a trumpet. Stop it, girl.
He was serious, I know, and we're like. I looked
at Ryan and he looked at me. We were both like,
it couldn't. It's a trumpet, Oh my god. And so
(07:43):
when we got there, Jordan played the trumpet yes, and
like that song is you know, that's going to be
our second single. It's going to be out on October third,
and it's got a trumpet because Alden said it should
have a trumpet. So they have been collaborator, is like
on this and to the extent that they want to
be you know, if they have zero interests, that's okay too,
(08:05):
but they have been so involved and this is you know,
inspired by them.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Oh I love this. I love this. I mean honestly, Lisa,
I've been on a quest for as long as I
can't remember to just like I've been seeking everything first,
seeking experiences, like seeking experiences, needing to know everything, wanting
to do it all, feel it all, beat all. I
feel like you've kind of had that same like lust
for life, you know, just like you're on like you
(08:33):
did so many things you were on Star Search. You
started off at like ten years old singing yeah, and
then what was that journey like? Because I feel like
I have that same hunger just wanting to do it,
be it, experience it. Oh, you do it all.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
You know. When I was a kid, I was very shy,
and I mean I still like have a lot of
that in me now. But like as a kid, I
just I love to sing so much, but I just
hated being in front.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
Of people really oh gosh.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Yeah. And so my my folks got me into like
children's theater and so I did The Lion King when
I was ten, and that was like the greatest. That
was such a great experience because I got to play
a character.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
And a lion.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
I was not all love.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
You were not.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
You were not And it's like I was on a
playground with like some of my friends who have been
lifelong friends, and that experience was just so much fun
and was just what.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Did that show you? As a ten year old? What
did that do? That's like a core memory, a core
moment that like changes everything. What switched in your brain
then that day, you know, that experience.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
It showed me like so especially with musical theater, like
you're going to the the theater every day, you know,
except Sundays or except Mondays, and and so that like
work ethic, but when it's something you love to do,
doesn't feel like work at all. Even as a kid,
even as a kid, oh my gosh, I loved going
(09:59):
to the theater like it was so much fun. And
it showed me then like Okay, you can work and
do something that you love to do. And you know,
I'm actually just kind of realizing this and as you
ask me, like I'm realizing that was the moment where
I realized, like I could do something that I love
to do and that can be my job.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
It wasn't like some lofty dream. It was like it's
this tangible I'm actually in it right now totally, So
I'm just gonna keep doing this totally. So you've followed that,
How did you keep following it? Because you're starting at ten,
I mean that's an early start. You still got to
go to school.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
You still got a lot of things to do. Yeah,
a lot of stuff to cover. I started doing singing
competitions or like looking back, so many life lessons from
those experiences, but so much stress.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
Like pressure. It's a lot because you're a pressure performing.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Yeah, Like I mean definitely right before and then like
you it's a little bit of an out of body experience,
you know, like as you're on stage, like it just
felt okay, like I'm in it.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Like I'm like, it's just a lot to hold as
a ten year old though, it is.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
You know it is, and like especially like when I
did American Idol when I was sixteen, that's like a
very vulnerable age.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
And having the world lay their eyes on you like that,
Like I am like, ah okay. So when I was
like in my wonder lust trying to do it all
feel at all because I needed so many experiences. Mine
was coming from a sense of worthiness. It's like I
don't feel worthy. I need to be validated by the world.
And also I had these talents that I wanted to pursue. Yeah,
but I just wanted to like see the people that
I thought had figured it out. That was my goal
(11:36):
and to be in there with these magical people. But
along the way, I realize, you just you realize the
pressure that comes with that and what I've learned about
fame and now I've had so much therapy and work
and I'm completely shifted my mentality. But like you realize that,
like fame is really intense and it's really dangerous. Yeah,
and it can be very harmful to someone. It can
(11:57):
be a wonderful tool, but it is not like this like,
oh my gosh, your famous life is glamorous. And I
think we've seen that so much in the recent years
of like everyone just kind of like blow on the
top of what's really going going on. So you at
sixteen were on in gosh, American Idol was in its
heyday back there. That was like the prime of American Idol.
(12:18):
That was the show everybody watched. There wasn't like there
was all these millions of options and like TikTok channels
and things like that. It was like American Idol and
you were on a hot season and to have the
whole world weighing in on you, judging literally, judging exactly literally,
news articles being written about you that you're sixteen.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Yeah, that was that was a little intense, I think,
you know, talking about fame, and you know, when you
get to the top ten, you go on tour, and
they were still doing the American Idol tours after this
your top ten. Yeah, and when it was christ Kelly Pickler,
Catherine McPhee, Taylor Hicks, Taylor Hicks. Yeah, okay, so we
(13:04):
went on tour and like my twenty one year old
brother at the time, is it still yeah, okay, my.
Speaker 1 (13:13):
God is with us?
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Okay, having a moment?
Speaker 1 (13:17):
May this interview be led from God? Anyway? Though?
Speaker 2 (13:19):
You know, I love it.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
The lines just flickered, so it's like, you know, it's
always a great Okay, your twenty one year old brother.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Was my chaperone on tour. So that was really I mean,
that was what that's probably a story for another day,
but uh, it was wild. He we joked that he
like still owes me for that because he had the
time of his life. He had the time I would
be calling him from the hotel, like when do you
think you're gonna be home? I'm like watching like movies,
(13:50):
like in our hotel room, like ordering room service, and
just like absolutely nothing on that tour. But your brother
lived it up. He lived it up.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Okay, good for him, going to give him one of
his great great seasons.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Yeah, yeah, he deserved it. But but I really recognized
that like what I wanted and what I didn't, and
like how unimportant being noticed or or fame was to
me really, and even at that age, I just wanted
to sing. And I realized that, you know, doing so
many of the shows where you're literally being judged in
(14:25):
front of millions of people kind of like can affect
your relationship with music, you know, And for a while,
music was not fun. You know, music was something I did.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
And it's a.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Stressful and pressure for sure. You're trying to live up
to something.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
I think, so maybe the expectations of of you know,
just a whole bunch of people now, I mean nobody
cares like about me, you know.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
Like and it's a lot of it's a lot of
it's a lot of energy on you at once, coming
from a lot of people that I don't experience that.
That's the famous You're having so much energy and on
you at one time.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
You think that people are thinking about you all the time,
and it's really not the case. People have their own
stuff going on and their own troubles and their own
lives and their own joys and all of these things,
and it's like, okay, like I don't have to think that,
like people are wondering what I'm doing or like have
these expectations of me to perform or to sing or
(15:26):
to like I gotta just shut that down, like I
what do I want? What makes me happy? And like
it took a little time and probably having kids to realize,
like life's too short to not do what you want
to do, you know, and be concerned with other people.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
So what kind of pressure did you feel you needed
to do? Were you wrapping your identity up and singing?
I think I so young?
Speaker 2 (15:50):
Yeah, And it was what I what. It was what
I was going to do, and it was what I
was supposed to do. And definitely like not even pressure
from my folks because they were just like whatever you
you know, whatever you want, We're just here to support you.
They were not stage parents at all. But I had
this pressure on myself that like, oh, you have to
become a successful musician, and and I just I, you know,
(16:14):
I got sick in my twenties.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
And this is right after American Idol.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
This was a few years later. And I'm you know,
who knows if stress or what has has an.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
Effect on are stressed after American Idol?
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Yeah, yeah, I think so. I didn't. I knew I
wanted to do music, but I didn't know in like
what capacity. Like I was still figuring myself out. And
so at the time, it was like, Okay, you know,
you just got off American Idol. You look like this,
you should be doing pop, R and B. And like meanwhile,
(16:50):
like I was not like a.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
Sexy girl or like you're very sexy.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
I could not dance like this was just a mistake
all around. It just didn't feel right. It didn't feel
comfortable right, It was not It was not what I
should have been doing. But I didn't know, and everything easy, yeah,
And I think everyone had good intentions. I just I
just think that I didn't know what I wanted and.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
It's so it's so easily to be persuaded because they're like,
this is what's gonna work. Like you said, this is
how you sound, this is how you look. You need
to be like this, you need to dress like this,
you need to act like this, and you're just gonna
slide right in that we're gonna have another star, right exactly.
I was like, oh, okay, and yeah, probably you had
a life crisis. I mean, because it's like, I know
(17:38):
my husband had to happen to him, I had to
happen to me. It's like you get in the middle.
Not to speak anyone's story, I'll speak for myself, but
you get in the big machine of it all totally,
and everyone knows better because they've had success. But it's
really art is the true, magical, amazing art that really
connects is the art that is coming from that human
because that is their connection to the higher so totally,
(18:01):
but when you take that out of it, forget that,
make it just a business, you lose that higher connection
and call it that soul. Yeah, and then you lose yourself.
And then that probably made your body freak out, you know,
because your body's like, this is not what we're supposed.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
To be doing right, all this like adrenaline and stress
that's just like housed inside. It's just like it's got
a manifest in some way. And I think that, you know,
all the while, like you know, when I was I
was trying to be a pop R and B artist,
Like I was, you know, at home with like an
acoustic guitar, writing songs for myself.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
What do you really want to be?
Speaker 2 (18:37):
I think I wanted to be a folk singer.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
You know, you have such a beautiful like your voice,
the way it can like go so high and whispy
and beautiful, and you're such like an intricate singer too.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
It just I really fell in love with songwriting and
it was just a way to express so many of
the feelings that I had to to get out. But
I think like after getting sick, when I you know,
after I had our first son, and I was like, okay,
(19:09):
like I'm feeling like some energy, we're getting a rhythm
like with having a child, Like maybe I should like
go out and like start doing music again. And I
like kind of dip my toe in and I was like, wait,
am I doing this? Because I'm just trying to pick
up where I left off? Or do I really want this?
Speaker 1 (19:30):
Oh that's a good that's a good big question to
wrestle with a big question.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
And I feel you on that so hard. I want
to heart.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Talked about my journey so many times on this podcast
yours is so much short interesting. Well, I just like
cut off all my hair, dyed it brown, like just
kind of had a full life meldowne crisis, like who
am I? Why am I doing anything? You know, like
why have I doing this? Because I've done this forever?
Or do I really like it? Is it me? What
actually motivates me? Yes? I kind of felt like insane.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
It's it's it's a wild feeling to stop, stop and
assess and like you've been doing something since you were
literally ten years old.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
You're great at it, you're good at it, you've had
great success with it. But yet it's like you never
had the full moment or time to like really dig
in and be like what do I love? Because you're
good at all these different versions of it, and all
these different versions were working, and all these different versions
were propelling you for it, and you were doing your
gifts like singing and lion king being on American idol
trying all those songs out, and then you get thrust
(20:34):
into it where it's you, but it's like all these
other people telling you who you're gonna be sure, So
then you're freaking out and then it's like, oh my god,
and then you're kind of just like spit out on
the conveyor. But now you're like dealing with health issues
and all this mind confusion. Oh my god. It literally
is like PTSD big time. It was, and no one
(20:54):
was trying to do anything wrong.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
And like the like there was a beautiful part of
that time because I had a little bit more clarity
after having a child, just for me specifically, like or
me personally, Like I having a child just put a
(21:16):
lot of things in perspective for.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Me, like what.
Speaker 2 (21:19):
Joy?
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Like what is real joy?
Speaker 2 (21:21):
Like? What is joy? And like why? Like why am
I doing what I'm doing? There's like only so much
time in a day in your life and you know,
just in general, like what am I doing with that time?
Speaker 1 (21:38):
And why?
Speaker 2 (21:39):
And why? Like like there's a you know, a saying
of like you know, of knowing all the things that
I know now, like to what will I dedicate my life?
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Oh that's good and like knowing all the things that
I know now to what will I dedicate my life?
Oh and if you're not doing all the things you want,
those are it's hard to hard to upbrute and change
the whole system operating system totally, but.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
You have to.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
You have to look at it.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
Yeah, and you know, and.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
A kid really will trump everything, Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (22:11):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I just want I want to be
with him all the time.
Speaker 1 (22:14):
And every yes you say that it's not to him
is a no to him. So it's like it's got
to be worth it. It's got to be worth the yes.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
Yeah. Yeah, And yeah, parenthood is wild wild.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
You're doing such a great job at it. You are too,
I mean, thank you. I do feel like I'm doing
a great job at it because I'm really giving it
everything I have. I am learning, i am making mistakes,
i am loving with every bit of everything I have.
I'm loving the best I've ever loved because I just
I just she's the best thing I've ever loved. And
(22:48):
I just know that, like I am her example of
love and I just want to give her the very
best I have. And I'm still like totally messing it up.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
I know, you know, I'm same. Like it was like
it was hilarious. Like a couple months ago, our toddler
was on top of me. He was nursing. I was
lying down on the bed and he was on top
of me nursing, and I like put my hand on
his back as he was nursing, and he stops and
he says to me, he says, don't really want to
(23:18):
be touched right now. You're like, I'm like, you are
literally I didn't say this, but I was thinking, like,
oh my god, he's literally on top of me nursing
and he's saying he just wanted me touched right now.
Part of me was like super proud that he was
like expressing his boundaries, and the other part of me
was like, oh my god, but that is so like
(23:40):
parent Like that's parenthood, you know, and it's it's also
this really you know, they say like they're no perfect parents,
and I believe that is one hundred percent true. And
then I like pulled back and I was trying to
like understand like the different roles that I play in life.
You know, I'm a daughter, I'm a sister, I'm a wife.
(24:03):
Why do I kind of obsess about or why don't
I obsess about being perfect in those roles, you know,
the same way that I do as being a mother.
And and I was like, wait a second, Like because
I recognize those things as relationships, those are like I
think about the way that I want to show up
(24:25):
as a wife or a mother, or a sister or
a daughter, and I just show up the best I
can in every interaction. Right. But I feel like as
modern parents, like a lot of times we look at
parenthood as like a checklist or something to do versus
a relationship with our child. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
You have all these things to do for this kid
to keep them alive and help me and said and ready.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
Right exactly, versus like, how do I just show up?
How do I be I can in every moment? How
do I know them? I want to know. I want
to know them and I want to understand that and
I want them to feel like they're like, are not
a checklist for me? You know? We are just in
a relationship and we are modeling that relationship. And when
(25:09):
I don't show up the way that I hope to,
I go back and I repair, you know, and we're
modeling for that.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
So big. That is so big to be able to
go back and say, I'm sorry, Yes, I did that wrong.
Speaker 2 (25:23):
Yeah, And here's how I like to do it moving forward.
And I hope that you know, you can hold me
accountable for that. And we're showing them how to be
in relationships with our other human beings. And I've just
been thinking about that so much and it just really
took some of the pressure off of needing to be
perfect or am I doing enough? Like I just need
(25:46):
to show up and like show him how much I
care about him, you know, And that's just being you know,
supportive in my interactions with him.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
To what is real joy to you know, Oh, that's
a good question.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
Being with my family.
Speaker 3 (26:07):
There's usually some music involved, Like y'all are always like
writing playing music, Like even like watching your making a
RUBUSMB it's like Ryan, your husband has like the toddler
strapped on and.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Alden's out there like rocking, and I'm like, y'all are
truly in y'all's house is so beautiful. It's on land
and it's just like in space and nature, and I
just feel like you guys are such great parents, Like
this is such a magical life that your boys are getting.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
Oh man, Caroline, I feel the same way about you guys.
Like honestly, like just being with them is that's enough.
That is not amazing, you know, Like I just I'm
really enjoying my kids and and getting to know them.
Like that's really what it is, you know. It's it's
(27:00):
really really cool. And I think like there's something so
beautiful about childhood and the fact that like at one point,
like every human being wanted the same thing, and that's
like their nurture of their their mother, you know, or
their or their father and or collective. And like that's
why I'm so excited about you know, this company and
(27:23):
this project is like we can reach kids and and
help support parents in having you know, these conversations, to
help support the foundation for their children's mental health. And
in such a time where it's wild to be raising kids.
It is a wild time, and I'm sure every generation
(27:44):
of parents has felt this way. But with technology, I
think we're a little bit in a wild West of
raising kids and you know, learning years down the road
how things, especially technology are affecting our children. So it's
it's we're all just really again in the wild West
here and trying to figure it out and to have
(28:06):
a community where you know, we can say, oh, right,
we know that these things are things that they're going
to need no matter what happens in the world in
the next ten years, Like they're going to need these tools,
Like how do we help them, you know, build this
foundation for these tools.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
I love that. And in a world where it's just more,
more and more, more, more and more, there's just more everything.
There's more stimulation, there's more distractions, there's more comparisons, there's
more opportunities, there's more disappointments. I mean, there's just more.
There's more access to seeing everything yeah immediately, And I
think that, like I feel like mental health is at
(28:45):
an all time high, like crisis because you don't know
how to you don't know how to sift through all
this and you don't know how to process it. And
we're what we really need are what you're teaching in
these books, in these videos is the core foundation is
to navigate life instead of just getting thrown into it
all and then literally just like treading water, are trying
(29:05):
to save yourself and hang on for dear life. It's
like we need these life wraps around us of these
core things that show us how to do it. How
what we always can come back to in all different
types of situations. It's like, you need the pillars of
the foundation of what, of what really will give you
a good life, then you can navigate the chaos of
(29:26):
it all. But it's like you gotta have the foundation.
Speaker 2 (29:28):
First, totally, totally, and it's hard to get that it
really is. And there's no like one way to do this,
you know, And like all your child really needs is you,
you know, and I believe that you know, they don't need,
you know, all of the toys or all of the
books or all of the things, like they need you period.
(29:51):
What we hope to do with this is to you know,
just the same way that having a stroller is really
convenient when you're walking your baby around of a place
for a long time. You know, it's it's a tool,
it's it's something to help support and and that is
really meaningful to me because I know that's what I
(30:15):
try not to catastrophize because it can be easy to
do that, especially as a parent. So I just know
that I want them to be equipped for whatever comes
their way. And we hope that you know, these songs
and stories and tools will will be helpful. That's that's
all we can hope for.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
So tell me about the characters. You said there's eight characters,
and tell me about kind of the stories, like what
are some of the things that we'll be learning.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
So when we first were creating the characters, there were
two articles that really stood out to us. One that parents,
modern parents are not really singing to their kids as much,
which really stood out to me. But the reason is
because they're self conscious. I believe that they're self conscious
about their voices, which is wild, because your baby loves
(31:05):
nothing more like than your voice, you know. And they
were saying that, you know, a lot of parents listen
to music or play music for their kids, but recorded
music does not register the same way to a child
as live music does. There's something about like the compression
and recording, so they don't they don't register the same way.
(31:27):
And so your voice is like the best thing to
soothe your baby. Whether you're on pitch or whatever, it
doesn't matter. They just love your voice. And then there
was another article about songbirds nightingales specifically losing their songs
in different parts of the world. And so we created
(31:47):
Rufus who is a nightingale and his best friend is
a honeybee. And they go and they meet different characters
in every character kind of helps them through a situation
and teaches them some life lesson through a song. And
so whether it's about being present, there's uh, you know,
(32:10):
in our first story, Rufus is trying to overcome an
obstacle and that's when he and b first meet and
she helps him understand that it's it's really not about
trying to impress, it's about expressing. And there's you know,
self love, there's gratitude, there's there's really just understanding that
(32:35):
things are going to work out the way that they
are supposed to work out. And I think again, like
as we think about these stories, like there are stories
that I like, I need to hear as an adult,
and so to to just share those with them now
in a really fun and playful.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Way, I love that. I love that, And I feel like, honestly,
just to have an option, like there's so much once
again to watch, to read, to to consume with children,
a lot of it isn't helpful, sure, you know, to
have something that is so helpful that the kids can
(33:15):
love the singing, just like to get that programming in
their brain at such a young age. What's that quote
y'all say, it's a lot easier to raise.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Oh, it's it's easier to raise strong children than to
repair broken men. That's a Frederick Douglas quote. Right, and women,
you know we added and women people. Yeah, so, but
it's it's it's it's so true. Like focusing on especially
the first five years of a child's life. You know,
(33:45):
they're finding My husband is an advisor for a neuro
institute called the liber Institute's brilliant.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
He's like brilliant. He's one of those guys that you
just like him. I feel like he's like so smart though,
like understands and like retains a lot of really complicated information,
a very good callback.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
But yeah, like he he affises this institute and is
working with an amazing neuroscientist there, and they're finding so
much even you know, in mental health, how you know
you can be born with these genes, but it's really
whether these genes are triggered or not that can you know, uh,
(34:27):
can manifest as mental health issues. And how impactful the
first five years of childhood. Oh my gosh, Like you.
Speaker 1 (34:37):
That's the whole wiring system. That's built, the.
Speaker 2 (34:39):
Whole wiring system, and and that can it's not, you know,
fool proof, and you know you can rewire, you can exactly.
It's harder. It's harder, and the the the brain is
so malleable at that at that stage, and you are
really just doing a lot of the investment.
Speaker 1 (34:58):
That's the investment period, you know, oh Lisa, And it
takes a long time to get that ROI. I mean really,
you just gotta know you're in it. But you get
the little ones all along the way, like you're saying,
like a real joy, oh.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
So much joy. And it's like recognizing that, like there's
a beautiful quote and I'm gonna butcher it, but like
about you know, recognizing the listening to them now, whether
it's about the legos or the you know what, like
the barbies or whatever, like recognizing that what they're telling
(35:38):
you now is important to them. And if you want
them to tell you the important things as they get older,
you have to listen to them now because they were
always the important things, you know.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
And then they always want to tell you.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
And then they always want to tell you, and to
listen without judgment and always go in with curiosity, like
be someone they want.
Speaker 1 (36:01):
To talk to, you know, take what they say seriously.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
And they recognize when you when you do, and appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
So I love that. Gosh, you're like the kid whisper.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Oh my please you are Oh no, no, I'm just figuring.
I'm just trying to figure it out one day at
a time. But again just going into it as a
whole relationship with a whole human being, you know, not
one that I'm trying to shape or you know, like
control or just's he's a whole Like they're both whole people,
(36:37):
you know, and I just I get to experience them
and and help guide them. But that's that's the most
that I can do.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
I love that. Okay, so obviously I am no doctor
at all, but I'm obsessed with energy. I'm obsessed with
like mindset and like what we talked about, you know,
like understanding yourself, how you did the hard questioning and
rewiring and deciding what you want to pursue and what
you don't. Have you noticed and your mom I saw video,
it's in y'all's video. Your mom was like, having kids,
it's gonna help you it's gonna cure your autoimmune disorder.
(37:07):
It's gonna make you better. Now since you have embarked
on this life, you left California, you and your husband said,
here we go. We're going to start this life. We're
getting in an RV. We're moving to Nashville. We're going
to live in the land. We're not going to worry
about chasing this career in a certain way. We're gonna
let our hearts be free. You sing and you're making
music with your family, and you're full of love and light.
(37:30):
Have you felt physically better? You know?
Speaker 2 (37:34):
When I got pregnant with our first son, a lot
of my symptoms went into remission.
Speaker 1 (37:40):
That's what your mom said. How does she know that
she knew that you're going to be feeling so much love?
Speaker 2 (37:44):
She I don't know. I think she knew that my
body was going to be going through some major changes
through pregnancy, and it did. It was a lot of
things got better. Really, life was so much more manageable,
you know. I mean I was spending oh gosh, so
(38:06):
many nights, just so many days in bed, you know,
nights on the bathroom floor, like just really ill and
in a dark place. Mentally because I just I think
I was like looking at my life and you know,
it was this tiny little circle within this like circle
(38:27):
of pain. And after you know, I had a real
like mentality shift of like, Okay, no, my life is
the big circle and the pain is the little circle within.
You know, it's a huge, respective shit, it was huge,
and it changed so much.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
Because it before you were so consumed with the pain
because it's all consuming. So that was your world and
then you're like, no, this is not who I am,
right right, And it goes back to rufus eb detaching
from the feeling and really not naming it and it's
not the whole entire being of who you are, totally totally.
Speaker 2 (39:05):
And I think there was also, gosh, this this thought
of like I couldn't really live my life until I
was better. And now, like you know, there are still
like symptoms that I deal with a headache that I've
had for you know, years.
Speaker 1 (39:24):
But I wake up and like every day every day
you have a headache every day?
Speaker 2 (39:28):
Every day?
Speaker 4 (39:29):
You have a headache every day every day, Oh, Lisa, Yeah,
it's and but I'm okay, like I have learned to
compartmentalize that that.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
Pain and to recognize like if I I mean, I
still have hope that you know, I can get better.
But it's it's this idea that like, oh if I don't,
I can still live a beautiful, joyful, meaningful life.
Speaker 1 (39:56):
Yeah, that's a big, big moment. Oh gosh, to wrap
your head around.
Speaker 2 (40:02):
Literally, yeah, seriously, seriously.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
So, I mean just to live with chronic pain is
no joke.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
It's not fun, and I mean it really just makes
you just have a little grace for other people because
you don't know, like, you know, and it's one of
those things like the person looks fine and you so
you just don't know how much they're actually dealing with.
(40:30):
Like at the time, my husband was, you know, working
on his company, and so like I would like muster
up every bit of strength I had to like join
him for a dinner or an event or things like that,
and like, you know, you get your hair done and
you do your makeup, and like you look fine, but
you don't feel fine. And so I just I never
assume anything about anyone and I just try to walk
(40:53):
through life like that and just really have a little grace.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
So yeah, yeah, you just never know what someone is
going through.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
Never and everyone's going through something. Yeah, yeah, man, that's
a huge like I mean, it's a hard way to
get the understanding, but I mean that's a huge blessing
to have that understanding. And like what a loving soul
you are to like enter the world. I feel that
from you. When I am around you, I just feel
just like openness, Like you are just so loving. You
(41:25):
just have such a loving radiation for.
Speaker 2 (41:27):
Feeling is so mutual. I remember when I first met you,
and Brian and I were in the car on the
way home, and I was just like, gosh, she's such
great energy. We just such great energy all the time.
Speaker 1 (41:41):
Thank you. I mean I fail too, Like I recently failed.
I like let someone I was working with someone and
I just handled myself so poorly in the situation, and
I'm like, I've done so much work on myself, and
like when I like have a step back like that,
like I haven't had in so long, I'm like, oh,
do you ever like go into a spiral like a
self self talk spoilem, Like I'm a terrible person? Who
(42:02):
do I think I am?
Speaker 2 (42:03):
I'm such a fraud.
Speaker 1 (42:04):
Like I like totally panicked and like reacted and did
a handle myself awfully, and I'm just like, oh, I
can just fall down the shame sparrow so quickly. I
need res and b.
Speaker 2 (42:16):
I mean you know that you're like any time. It's
the same idea with with what we're talking about with repair.
Speaker 1 (42:24):
Like.
Speaker 2 (42:26):
I mean, we're humans, Like when you're in relationships, you
will make mistakes, Like that's what we do, like and
then how do we respond, you know, and that's that's
all we can do. That's all we can.
Speaker 1 (42:40):
Do, I know you I know, yeah, just kidding these
Like I think I had gone along a little while
without a real human moment. Like I've had a lot
of human moments, but they haven't been like coming from
me because I've been doing such a a I've been
trying so hard for so many years just to like
clean up my debris and my energy feel good, like
learn these things about life and act from a woman
(43:02):
state and not like a you know, damaged child and
like going back into my spirals and so like when
I have like I hadn't had a moment like this
in a while, and I'm like, oh, just a fail.
Speaker 2 (43:11):
I just fail.
Speaker 1 (43:13):
You know.
Speaker 2 (43:14):
We have a song about that, Like it's it's Failing
is vital.
Speaker 1 (43:24):
It's feel.
Speaker 2 (43:27):
Because because so long, because fail has notoriously been this ugly,
dirty world.
Speaker 1 (43:35):
That's how I feel. I feel ugly and I feel dirty,
you know, because it's like, oh, you're the failure instead
of someone else failing and you're dealing with the hardship
of the failure. Yes, you're the failure.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
Failure is vital to existence because there's no life without failure.
And like if we're not failing, we're not learning, you know,
like failure is important and it's it's again like why
we have a song about failure because you know, for
(44:07):
so many of us, like for our generation, it was
like like don't fail, like fee failing is bad and no,
failing is a part of life and if you can
embrace it and learn from whatever whatever it is, then
then you can move forward a better person than before. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:27):
Yeah, I know. We're always a work in progress, always
and you got to learn. Like that's once again, I'm
coming back to Rufersyn. I'm so happy I wrote this
book and have this series caming out because I'm like,
you got to learn these things. You need to have
tools to go back to, you know, you need to
have tools even as an adult, like to be able
to go back into that book and like identify this
and like maybe sing the song when I when it
(44:48):
comes out.
Speaker 2 (44:48):
When's the album coming out the October tenth. Okay, yes,
the artist is Tiny Prime and it's me and my
husband so good and the album is called Rufus and b.
Speaker 1 (45:00):
Rufus and b. But to have these tools and to
have them simple enough for a child to understand, that
means maybe some adults can understand it too, because it's
hard to get stuffed through our heads.
Speaker 2 (45:09):
You know, we can teach old dogs new trick. We can.
Speaker 1 (45:15):
We can. That's my hope for everyone listening. Listen, listen
to old dogs out there.
Speaker 2 (45:20):
I'm with you.
Speaker 1 (45:20):
I'm in the same club.
Speaker 2 (45:21):
We can learn too.
Speaker 1 (45:25):
It's not too late to be the best and brightest
version of ourselves and to learn and to rewire to
reevaluate that is.
Speaker 2 (45:33):
It's hard work.
Speaker 1 (45:34):
But it's crucial.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Never too late, never too late.
Speaker 1 (45:37):
I always wrap up with leave your Light. This has
been such a wonderful interview. I just have loved every
bit of it.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
Lisa, me too, Caroline, thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (45:44):
So glad you're here. What do you want people to know.
It's super open ended.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
Gosh, I feel like we've covered so much. I know,
love yourself. It's not about us or it's not about
it's about you. Whoever's listening, you know, it's it's about you,
and you gotta love yourself first.
Speaker 1 (46:14):
Amen.
Speaker 2 (46:15):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (46:16):
Okay, RUFS and B coming out October tenth.
Speaker 2 (46:18):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (46:19):
Where can everyone find it?
Speaker 2 (46:20):
Wherever you listen to music?
Speaker 1 (46:22):
Okay and if are U f us and B E
A E. I love it? Lisa hummy. Lisa Tucker comments perfect,
I love it, and check your music out too because
it's so good. Okay, you're the best.
Speaker 2 (46:34):
Bye bye,
Adam, Ada, Adam.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Carol Lone, she's a queen.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
Talking, so she's getting really not afraid to feel the
episode and so just let her flow.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
No one can do we quiet. Carl Lone is so Caroline.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
I am so excited to be here today with my
friend Lisa.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
Tucker commins, I'm happy to be here with my friend
Caroline cutbirth Hobby, Hella. I got the middle name.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Okay, okay, what's up? Oh a lot?
Speaker 2 (00:46):
You know? I am currently launching a company with my husband.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
How's that going off? Started so much over the pandemic. Yes,
you guys went hard over the pandemic.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
We did, you know? We moved from LA to Nashville.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
And how was that? Because you were in the Great
Migration from California. It's literally like people in the old
days would have been wagons with their mules just come
in our way. I mean literally, I feel like the
whole all of California migrated.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
I feel like they did. But I still like had
no friends when I got here, So I don't know
how that happened. But yeah, we did it with our
two year old at the time, and like a six
week old puppy Golden Retriever it was madness. But we
drove across the country with them, and how was that?
It was beautiful?
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Was it like the Great Adventure?
Speaker 2 (01:36):
It was crazy because you know at the time, like
everyone was still so afraid and nobody knew what was happening,
but it was. It was an adventure, it really was.
And we sang so much.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Musical family Ryan too, right.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
You know, he did not have music growing up, like
really in his house, but he sings all the time.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
He loved it.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Like before we had kids, like he would say about
make makeup songs about anything and everything, food, getting into
the car, washing our face at night, like he just singing.
He just sings joyful health. He makes it so joyful.
And then once we had kids.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Music makes it joyful too.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Oh my gosh, it really does. I think music, like
we always say, like music is this ancient technology that
like can be harnessed for so many things. It helps
you remember things, truly, Like it's great at like reminding
you to do things. Yes, it's how we connect. You
can connect through emotion.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
And drive a life lesson home, Oh my gosh, like
y'all's album he made Rube Simbie, I mean driving Life
Lessons home for children. It's truly it can like impact
so quickly and effectively.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
It is so powerful. It is so powerful. And when
we first started, you know, these songs, we never had
the intention of recording them or making this album or
starting this company. But it was after you know, a
couple of years of this just being in our family
and these songs just being a part of our everyday life.
(03:08):
And I remember I was doing I was doing a
project with our oldest thought he was five now Alden,
and we were doing a project and I mess something
up and I was like a little frustrated, and I
remember him singing one of our songs back to us,
and I was like, oh, like, okay, he's not just
like listening to these songs, he is like internalizing them,
flying them in the correct feeling, flying them. It was.
(03:31):
It was mind blowing, and it was like, okay, so
this is kind of a thing. Maybe this can like
be helpful to other people. And so we decided to
create all of these characters to kind of cement the
lessons because I mean, you know, as a parent, like
if you are asking your child, like if you're talking
to Sonny and you're asking her to talk about how
(03:52):
she's feeling about a particular thing.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
It can be hard, yes, And I mean.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
If it's hard for adults to like have that pressure
on them to to express their feelings in a in
like a given moment, and so the characters really help
kids have these conversations without feeling the pressure of being
the center of it.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
I mean, I still, like you said, I still have
trouble getting my full feelings out and not being not
associating my entire existence with a feeling. You know, It's
like it's even as adults, we weren't taught that. At
least it wasn't mainstream back in the day. Mental health
Phou show was not mainstream back in the day. You know,
everything was tucked and stuffed and just move on and
work hard and put your head up and do the
(04:31):
best they can.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Cry, get over that feeling and move on.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
Yes, just stuff it and it will then it will
magically disappear.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Exactly wrong, exactly, it just is.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
It just festers inside of you and creates these core
memories that you come back to when you get triggered
and you do the same behavior and you obsessed about it.
I'm not speaking for here, can.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
You tell girl, you're not alone like to learn that.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
As a kid, and that's what y'all are doing. You're
just like, let me teach you that you are not
your full feeling as a kid. It right, Let me
explain to you what it is and how to identify
it and work with it and not like freak out.
So tell me about the characters. Who are they?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I mean, like like to what you just said, Like,
these are like muscles as important as like flexing as
your physical muscles. You know, these muscles need to be
flexed in this early early childhood development.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Stage and the things we're most scared of. So we
want to run from them totally.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
And like we my husband and I, like we are
not like we don't have it figured out, you know,
we don't claim to. But at the same time, like
these are things that we feel like we need to
hear now, Yeah, and so we want to share those
with our kids for them so that they can start
flexing those muscles now.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
So they don't have to do years of undoing all
the things they learn. They can just start with the
right knowledge to then you don't have to do therapy
the whole first half of your life.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
You know, that's right.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
I love that, and God bless everyone, and everyone's doing
the best they can, but no one had the tools.
That's why I literally am so appreciate to you guys,
and when people come out with tools and books that
have tools in them, so we all can just like
skip this very messy part in the middle where we
mess ourselves up, where we mess our kids up. It's
all accidental. Right, let's go and get some core good foundation.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Definitely, definitely, and they're really like these these books. Our
first book will come out in the spring, and you know,
every song on the album pairs.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
With a book. It's a lot of work.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
It's oh my gosh, did a lot of work.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
It's and you have like animated pictures. Is there like
videos to go with it too?
Speaker 2 (06:33):
There there will be, there will be. Yeah, it's so
many different parts, like moving parts, and we're really just
figuring it out as we go. But like the beauty
of it, Like obviously we've put a lot of work
into it, but like given the the you know, being
(06:53):
for children, like you can't take yourself too seriously. It
just makes it fun and so we get to like
have fun. Even when we were recording the album, we
recorded with this amazing producer here in Nashville, Jordan Hamlin,
and she has this beautiful studio called Moxie and it's
on this land and we would bring our kids.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
And you love that that you can bring your kids.
I hate it when I have to separate and like
it's an adult only or you have to leave your kids.
It's so much more amazing when the kids get to old.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
My gosh. And they were a part of it. I
remember us going to the studio one day and we
were listening to one of our demos for one of
the songs, and our son, Alden, he was like, you know,
I think this could use a trumpet. Stop it, girl.
He was serious, I know, and we're like. I looked
at Ryan and he looked at me. We were both like,
it couldn't. It's a trumpet, Oh my god. And so
(07:43):
when we got there, Jordan played the trumpet yes, and
like that song is you know, that's going to be
our second single. It's going to be out on October third,
and it's got a trumpet because Alden said it should
have a trumpet. So they have been collaborator, is like
on this and to the extent that they want to
be you know, if they have zero interests, that's okay too,
(08:05):
but they have been so involved and this is you know,
inspired by them.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Oh I love this. I love this. I mean honestly, Lisa,
I've been on a quest for as long as I
can't remember to just like I've been seeking everything first,
seeking experiences, like seeking experiences, needing to know everything, wanting
to do it all, feel it all, beat all. I
feel like you've kind of had that same like lust
for life, you know, just like you're on like you
(08:33):
did so many things you were on Star Search. You
started off at like ten years old singing yeah, and
then what was that journey like? Because I feel like
I have that same hunger just wanting to do it,
be it, experience it. Oh, you do it all.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
You know. When I was a kid, I was very shy,
and I mean I still like have a lot of
that in me now. But like as a kid, I
just I love to sing so much, but I just
hated being in front.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
Of people really oh gosh.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Yeah. And so my my folks got me into like
children's theater and so I did The Lion King when
I was ten, and that was like the greatest. That
was such a great experience because I got to play
a character.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
And a lion.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
I was not all love.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
You were not.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
You were not And it's like I was on a
playground with like some of my friends who have been
lifelong friends, and that experience was just so much fun
and was just what.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Did that show you? As a ten year old? What
did that do? That's like a core memory, a core
moment that like changes everything. What switched in your brain
then that day, you know, that experience.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
It showed me like so especially with musical theater, like
you're going to the the theater every day, you know,
except Sundays or except Mondays, and and so that like
work ethic, but when it's something you love to do,
doesn't feel like work at all. Even as a kid,
even as a kid, oh my gosh, I loved going
(09:59):
to the theater like it was so much fun. And
it showed me then like Okay, you can work and
do something that you love to do. And you know,
I'm actually just kind of realizing this and as you
ask me, like I'm realizing that was the moment where
I realized, like I could do something that I love
to do and that can be my job.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
It wasn't like some lofty dream. It was like it's
this tangible I'm actually in it right now totally, So
I'm just gonna keep doing this totally. So you've followed that,
How did you keep following it? Because you're starting at ten,
I mean that's an early start. You still got to
go to school.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
You still got a lot of things to do. Yeah,
a lot of stuff to cover. I started doing singing
competitions or like looking back, so many life lessons from
those experiences, but so much stress.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
Like pressure. It's a lot because you're a pressure performing.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
Yeah, Like I mean definitely right before and then like
you it's a little bit of an out of body experience,
you know, like as you're on stage, like it just
felt okay, like I'm in it.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Like I'm like, it's just a lot to hold as
a ten year old though, it is.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
You know it is, and like especially like when I
did American Idol when I was sixteen, that's like a
very vulnerable age.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
And having the world lay their eyes on you like that,
Like I am like, ah okay. So when I was
like in my wonder lust trying to do it all
feel at all because I needed so many experiences. Mine
was coming from a sense of worthiness. It's like I
don't feel worthy. I need to be validated by the world.
And also I had these talents that I wanted to pursue. Yeah,
but I just wanted to like see the people that
I thought had figured it out. That was my goal
(11:36):
and to be in there with these magical people. But
along the way, I realize, you just you realize the
pressure that comes with that and what I've learned about
fame and now I've had so much therapy and work
and I'm completely shifted my mentality. But like you realize that,
like fame is really intense and it's really dangerous. Yeah,
and it can be very harmful to someone. It can
(11:57):
be a wonderful tool, but it is not like this like,
oh my gosh, your famous life is glamorous. And I
think we've seen that so much in the recent years
of like everyone just kind of like blow on the
top of what's really going going on. So you at
sixteen were on in gosh, American Idol was in its
heyday back there. That was like the prime of American Idol.
(12:18):
That was the show everybody watched. There wasn't like there
was all these millions of options and like TikTok channels
and things like that. It was like American Idol and
you were on a hot season and to have the
whole world weighing in on you, judging literally, judging exactly literally,
news articles being written about you that you're sixteen.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Yeah, that was that was a little intense, I think,
you know, talking about fame, and you know, when you
get to the top ten, you go on tour, and
they were still doing the American Idol tours after this
your top ten. Yeah, and when it was christ Kelly Pickler,
Catherine McPhee, Taylor Hicks, Taylor Hicks. Yeah, okay, so we
(13:04):
went on tour and like my twenty one year old
brother at the time, is it still yeah, okay, my.
Speaker 1 (13:13):
God is with us?
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Okay, having a moment?
Speaker 1 (13:17):
May this interview be led from God? Anyway? Though?
Speaker 2 (13:19):
You know, I love it.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
The lines just flickered, so it's like, you know, it's
always a great Okay, your twenty one year old brother.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Was my chaperone on tour. So that was really I mean,
that was what that's probably a story for another day,
but uh, it was wild. He we joked that he
like still owes me for that because he had the
time of his life. He had the time I would
be calling him from the hotel, like when do you
think you're gonna be home? I'm like watching like movies,
(13:50):
like in our hotel room, like ordering room service, and
just like absolutely nothing on that tour. But your brother
lived it up. He lived it up.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Okay, good for him, going to give him one of
his great great seasons.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Yeah, yeah, he deserved it. But but I really recognized
that like what I wanted and what I didn't, and
like how unimportant being noticed or or fame was to
me really, and even at that age, I just wanted
to sing. And I realized that, you know, doing so
many of the shows where you're literally being judged in
(14:25):
front of millions of people kind of like can affect
your relationship with music, you know, And for a while,
music was not fun. You know, music was something I did.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
And it's a.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Stressful and pressure for sure. You're trying to live up
to something.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
I think, so maybe the expectations of of you know,
just a whole bunch of people now, I mean nobody
cares like about me, you know.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
Like and it's a lot of it's a lot of
it's a lot of energy on you at once, coming
from a lot of people that I don't experience that.
That's the famous You're having so much energy and on
you at one time.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
You think that people are thinking about you all the time,
and it's really not the case. People have their own
stuff going on and their own troubles and their own
lives and their own joys and all of these things,
and it's like, okay, like I don't have to think that,
like people are wondering what I'm doing or like have
these expectations of me to perform or to sing or
(15:26):
to like I gotta just shut that down, like I
what do I want? What makes me happy? And like
it took a little time and probably having kids to realize,
like life's too short to not do what you want
to do, you know, and be concerned with other people.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
So what kind of pressure did you feel you needed
to do? Were you wrapping your identity up and singing?
I think I so young?
Speaker 2 (15:50):
Yeah, And it was what I what. It was what
I was going to do, and it was what I
was supposed to do. And definitely like not even pressure
from my folks because they were just like whatever you
you know, whatever you want, We're just here to support you.
They were not stage parents at all. But I had
this pressure on myself that like, oh, you have to
become a successful musician, and and I just I, you know,
(16:14):
I got sick in my twenties.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
And this is right after American Idol.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
This was a few years later. And I'm you know,
who knows if stress or what has has an.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
Effect on are stressed after American Idol?
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Yeah, yeah, I think so. I didn't. I knew I
wanted to do music, but I didn't know in like
what capacity. Like I was still figuring myself out. And
so at the time, it was like, Okay, you know,
you just got off American Idol. You look like this,
you should be doing pop, R and B. And like meanwhile,
(16:50):
like I was not like a.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
Sexy girl or like you're very sexy.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
I could not dance like this was just a mistake
all around. It just didn't feel right. It didn't feel
comfortable right, It was not It was not what I
should have been doing. But I didn't know, and everything easy, yeah,
And I think everyone had good intentions. I just I
just think that I didn't know what I wanted and.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
It's so it's so easily to be persuaded because they're like,
this is what's gonna work. Like you said, this is
how you sound, this is how you look. You need
to be like this, you need to dress like this,
you need to act like this, and you're just gonna
slide right in that we're gonna have another star, right exactly.
I was like, oh, okay, and yeah, probably you had
a life crisis. I mean, because it's like, I know
(17:38):
my husband had to happen to him, I had to
happen to me. It's like you get in the middle.
Not to speak anyone's story, I'll speak for myself, but
you get in the big machine of it all totally,
and everyone knows better because they've had success. But it's
really art is the true, magical, amazing art that really
connects is the art that is coming from that human
because that is their connection to the higher so totally,
(18:01):
but when you take that out of it, forget that,
make it just a business, you lose that higher connection
and call it that soul. Yeah, and then you lose yourself.
And then that probably made your body freak out, you know,
because your body's like, this is not what we're supposed.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
To be doing right, all this like adrenaline and stress
that's just like housed inside. It's just like it's got
a manifest in some way. And I think that, you know,
all the while, like you know, when I was I
was trying to be a pop R and B artist,
Like I was, you know, at home with like an
acoustic guitar, writing songs for myself.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
What do you really want to be?
Speaker 2 (18:37):
I think I wanted to be a folk singer.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
You know, you have such a beautiful like your voice,
the way it can like go so high and whispy
and beautiful, and you're such like an intricate singer too.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
It just I really fell in love with songwriting and
it was just a way to express so many of
the feelings that I had to to get out. But
I think like after getting sick, when I you know,
after I had our first son, and I was like, okay,
(19:09):
like I'm feeling like some energy, we're getting a rhythm
like with having a child, Like maybe I should like
go out and like start doing music again. And I
like kind of dip my toe in and I was like, wait,
am I doing this? Because I'm just trying to pick
up where I left off? Or do I really want this?
Speaker 1 (19:30):
Oh that's a good that's a good big question to
wrestle with a big question.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
And I feel you on that so hard. I want
to heart.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
Talked about my journey so many times on this podcast
yours is so much short interesting. Well, I just like
cut off all my hair, dyed it brown, like just
kind of had a full life meldowne crisis, like who
am I? Why am I doing anything? You know, like
why have I doing this? Because I've done this forever?
Or do I really like it? Is it me? What
actually motivates me? Yes? I kind of felt like insane.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
It's it's it's a wild feeling to stop, stop and
assess and like you've been doing something since you were
literally ten years old.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
You're great at it, you're good at it, you've had
great success with it. But yet it's like you never
had the full moment or time to like really dig
in and be like what do I love? Because you're
good at all these different versions of it, and all
these different versions were working, and all these different versions
were propelling you for it, and you were doing your
gifts like singing and lion king being on American idol
trying all those songs out, and then you get thrust
(20:34):
into it where it's you, but it's like all these
other people telling you who you're gonna be sure, So
then you're freaking out and then it's like, oh my god,
and then you're kind of just like spit out on
the conveyor. But now you're like dealing with health issues
and all this mind confusion. Oh my god. It literally
is like PTSD big time. It was, and no one
(20:54):
was trying to do anything wrong.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
And like the like there was a beautiful part of
that time because I had a little bit more clarity
after having a child, just for me specifically, like or
me personally, Like I having a child just put a
(21:16):
lot of things in perspective for.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Me, like what.
Speaker 2 (21:19):
Joy?
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Like what is real joy?
Speaker 2 (21:21):
Like? What is joy? And like why? Like why am
I doing what I'm doing? There's like only so much
time in a day in your life and you know,
just in general, like what am I doing with that time?
Speaker 1 (21:38):
And why?
Speaker 2 (21:39):
And why? Like like there's a you know, a saying
of like you know, of knowing all the things that
I know now, like to what will I dedicate my life?
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Oh that's good and like knowing all the things that
I know now to what will I dedicate my life?
Oh and if you're not doing all the things you want,
those are it's hard to hard to upbrute and change
the whole system operating system totally, but.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
You have to.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
You have to look at it.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
Yeah, and you know, and.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
A kid really will trump everything, Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (22:11):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I just want I want to be
with him all the time.
Speaker 1 (22:14):
And every yes you say that it's not to him
is a no to him. So it's like it's got
to be worth it. It's got to be worth the yes.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
Yeah. Yeah, And yeah, parenthood is wild wild.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
You're doing such a great job at it. You are too,
I mean, thank you. I do feel like I'm doing
a great job at it because I'm really giving it
everything I have. I am learning, i am making mistakes,
i am loving with every bit of everything I have.
I'm loving the best I've ever loved because I just
I just she's the best thing I've ever loved. And
(22:48):
I just know that, like I am her example of
love and I just want to give her the very
best I have. And I'm still like totally messing it up.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
I know, you know, I'm same. Like it was like
it was hilarious. Like a couple months ago, our toddler
was on top of me. He was nursing. I was
lying down on the bed and he was on top
of me nursing, and I like put my hand on
his back as he was nursing, and he stops and
he says to me, he says, don't really want to
(23:18):
be touched right now. You're like, I'm like, you are
literally I didn't say this, but I was thinking, like,
oh my god, he's literally on top of me nursing
and he's saying he just wanted me touched right now.
Part of me was like super proud that he was
like expressing his boundaries, and the other part of me
was like, oh my god, but that is so like
(23:40):
parent Like that's parenthood, you know, and it's it's also
this really you know, they say like they're no perfect parents,
and I believe that is one hundred percent true. And
then I like pulled back and I was trying to
like understand like the different roles that I play in life.
You know, I'm a daughter, I'm a sister, I'm a wife.
(24:03):
Why do I kind of obsess about or why don't
I obsess about being perfect in those roles, you know,
the same way that I do as being a mother.
And and I was like, wait a second, Like because
I recognize those things as relationships, those are like I
think about the way that I want to show up
(24:25):
as a wife or a mother, or a sister or
a daughter, and I just show up the best I
can in every interaction. Right. But I feel like as
modern parents, like a lot of times we look at
parenthood as like a checklist or something to do versus
a relationship with our child. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
You have all these things to do for this kid
to keep them alive and help me and said and ready.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
Right exactly, versus like, how do I just show up?
How do I be I can in every moment? How
do I know them? I want to know. I want
to know them and I want to understand that and
I want them to feel like they're like, are not
a checklist for me? You know? We are just in
a relationship and we are modeling that relationship. And when
(25:09):
I don't show up the way that I hope to,
I go back and I repair, you know, and we're
modeling for that.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
So big. That is so big to be able to
go back and say, I'm sorry, Yes, I did that wrong.
Speaker 2 (25:23):
Yeah, And here's how I like to do it moving forward.
And I hope that you know, you can hold me
accountable for that. And we're showing them how to be
in relationships with our other human beings. And I've just
been thinking about that so much and it just really
took some of the pressure off of needing to be
perfect or am I doing enough? Like I just need
(25:46):
to show up and like show him how much I
care about him, you know, And that's just being you know,
supportive in my interactions with him.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
To what is real joy to you know, Oh, that's
a good question.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
Being with my family.
Speaker 3 (26:07):
There's usually some music involved, Like y'all are always like
writing playing music, Like even like watching your making a
RUBUSMB it's like Ryan, your husband has like the toddler
strapped on and.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
Alden's out there like rocking, and I'm like, y'all are
truly in y'all's house is so beautiful. It's on land
and it's just like in space and nature, and I
just feel like you guys are such great parents, Like
this is such a magical life that your boys are getting.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
Oh man, Caroline, I feel the same way about you guys.
Like honestly, like just being with them is that's enough.
That is not amazing, you know, Like I just I'm
really enjoying my kids and and getting to know them.
Like that's really what it is, you know. It's it's
(27:00):
really really cool. And I think like there's something so
beautiful about childhood and the fact that like at one point,
like every human being wanted the same thing, and that's
like their nurture of their their mother, you know, or
their or their father and or collective. And like that's
why I'm so excited about you know, this company and
(27:23):
this project is like we can reach kids and and
help support parents in having you know, these conversations, to
help support the foundation for their children's mental health. And
in such a time where it's wild to be raising kids.
It is a wild time, and I'm sure every generation
(27:44):
of parents has felt this way. But with technology, I
think we're a little bit in a wild West of
raising kids and you know, learning years down the road
how things, especially technology are affecting our children. So it's
it's we're all just really again in the wild West
here and trying to figure it out and to have
(28:06):
a community where you know, we can say, oh, right,
we know that these things are things that they're going
to need no matter what happens in the world in
the next ten years, Like they're going to need these tools,
Like how do we help them, you know, build this
foundation for these tools.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
I love that. And in a world where it's just more,
more and more, more, more and more, there's just more everything.
There's more stimulation, there's more distractions, there's more comparisons, there's
more opportunities, there's more disappointments. I mean, there's just more.
There's more access to seeing everything yeah immediately, And I
think that, like I feel like mental health is at
(28:45):
an all time high, like crisis because you don't know
how to you don't know how to sift through all
this and you don't know how to process it. And
we're what we really need are what you're teaching in
these books, in these videos is the core foundation is
to navigate life instead of just getting thrown into it
all and then literally just like treading water, are trying
(29:05):
to save yourself and hang on for dear life. It's
like we need these life wraps around us of these
core things that show us how to do it. How
what we always can come back to in all different
types of situations. It's like, you need the pillars of
the foundation of what, of what really will give you
a good life, then you can navigate the chaos of
(29:26):
it all. But it's like you gotta have the foundation.
Speaker 2 (29:28):
First, totally, totally, and it's hard to get that it
really is. And there's no like one way to do this,
you know, And like all your child really needs is you,
you know, and I believe that you know, they don't need,
you know, all of the toys or all of the
books or all of the things, like they need you period.
(29:51):
What we hope to do with this is to you know,
just the same way that having a stroller is really
convenient when you're walking your baby around of a place
for a long time. You know, it's it's a tool,
it's it's something to help support and and that is
really meaningful to me because I know that's what I
(30:15):
try not to catastrophize because it can be easy to
do that, especially as a parent. So I just know
that I want them to be equipped for whatever comes
their way. And we hope that you know, these songs
and stories and tools will will be helpful. That's that's
all we can hope for.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
So tell me about the characters. You said there's eight characters,
and tell me about kind of the stories, like what
are some of the things that we'll be learning.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
So when we first were creating the characters, there were
two articles that really stood out to us. One that parents,
modern parents are not really singing to their kids as much,
which really stood out to me. But the reason is
because they're self conscious. I believe that they're self conscious
about their voices, which is wild, because your baby loves
(31:05):
nothing more like than your voice, you know. And they
were saying that, you know, a lot of parents listen
to music or play music for their kids, but recorded
music does not register the same way to a child
as live music does. There's something about like the compression
and recording, so they don't they don't register the same way.
(31:27):
And so your voice is like the best thing to
soothe your baby. Whether you're on pitch or whatever, it
doesn't matter. They just love your voice. And then there
was another article about songbirds nightingales specifically losing their songs
in different parts of the world. And so we created
(31:47):
Rufus who is a nightingale and his best friend is
a honeybee. And they go and they meet different characters
in every character kind of helps them through a situation
and teaches them some life lesson through a song. And
so whether it's about being present, there's uh, you know,
(32:10):
in our first story, Rufus is trying to overcome an
obstacle and that's when he and b first meet and
she helps him understand that it's it's really not about
trying to impress, it's about expressing. And there's you know,
self love, there's gratitude, there's there's really just understanding that
(32:35):
things are going to work out the way that they
are supposed to work out. And I think again, like
as we think about these stories, like there are stories
that I like, I need to hear as an adult,
and so to to just share those with them now
in a really fun and playful.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Way, I love that. I love that, And I feel like, honestly,
just to have an option, like there's so much once
again to watch, to read, to to consume with children,
a lot of it isn't helpful, sure, you know, to
have something that is so helpful that the kids can
(33:15):
love the singing, just like to get that programming in
their brain at such a young age. What's that quote
y'all say, it's a lot easier to raise.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Oh, it's it's easier to raise strong children than to
repair broken men. That's a Frederick Douglas quote. Right, and women,
you know we added and women people. Yeah, so, but
it's it's it's it's so true. Like focusing on especially
the first five years of a child's life. You know,
(33:45):
they're finding My husband is an advisor for a neuro
institute called the liber Institute's brilliant.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
He's like brilliant. He's one of those guys that you
just like him. I feel like he's like so smart though,
like understands and like retains a lot of really complicated information,
a very good callback.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
But yeah, like he he affises this institute and is
working with an amazing neuroscientist there, and they're finding so
much even you know, in mental health, how you know
you can be born with these genes, but it's really
whether these genes are triggered or not that can you know, uh,
(34:27):
can manifest as mental health issues. And how impactful the
first five years of childhood. Oh my gosh, Like you.
Speaker 1 (34:37):
That's the whole wiring system. That's built, the.
Speaker 2 (34:39):
Whole wiring system, and and that can it's not, you know,
fool proof, and you know you can rewire, you can exactly.
It's harder. It's harder, and the the the brain is
so malleable at that at that stage, and you are
really just doing a lot of the investment.
Speaker 1 (34:58):
That's the investment period, you know, oh Lisa, And it
takes a long time to get that ROI. I mean really,
you just gotta know you're in it. But you get
the little ones all along the way, like you're saying,
like a real joy, oh.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
So much joy. And it's like recognizing that, like there's
a beautiful quote and I'm gonna butcher it, but like
about you know, recognizing the listening to them now, whether
it's about the legos or the you know what, like
the barbies or whatever, like recognizing that what they're telling
(35:38):
you now is important to them. And if you want
them to tell you the important things as they get older,
you have to listen to them now because they were
always the important things, you know.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
And then they always want to tell you.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
And then they always want to tell you, and to
listen without judgment and always go in with curiosity, like
be someone they want.
Speaker 1 (36:01):
To talk to, you know, take what they say seriously.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
And they recognize when you when you do, and appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
So I love that. Gosh, you're like the kid whisper.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Oh my please you are Oh no, no, I'm just figuring.
I'm just trying to figure it out one day at
a time. But again just going into it as a
whole relationship with a whole human being, you know, not
one that I'm trying to shape or you know, like
control or just's he's a whole Like they're both whole people,
(36:37):
you know, and I just I get to experience them
and and help guide them. But that's that's the most
that I can do.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
I love that. Okay, so obviously I am no doctor
at all, but I'm obsessed with energy. I'm obsessed with
like mindset and like what we talked about, you know,
like understanding yourself, how you did the hard questioning and
rewiring and deciding what you want to pursue and what
you don't. Have you noticed and your mom I saw video,
it's in y'all's video. Your mom was like, having kids,
it's gonna help you it's gonna cure your autoimmune disorder.
(37:07):
It's gonna make you better. Now since you have embarked
on this life, you left California, you and your husband said,
here we go. We're going to start this life. We're
getting in an RV. We're moving to Nashville. We're going
to live in the land. We're not going to worry
about chasing this career in a certain way. We're gonna
let our hearts be free. You sing and you're making
music with your family, and you're full of love and light.
(37:30):
Have you felt physically better? You know?
Speaker 2 (37:34):
When I got pregnant with our first son, a lot
of my symptoms went into remission.
Speaker 1 (37:40):
That's what your mom said. How does she know that
she knew that you're going to be feeling so much love?
Speaker 2 (37:44):
She I don't know. I think she knew that my
body was going to be going through some major changes
through pregnancy, and it did. It was a lot of
things got better. Really, life was so much more manageable,
you know. I mean I was spending oh gosh, so
(38:06):
many nights, just so many days in bed, you know,
nights on the bathroom floor, like just really ill and
in a dark place. Mentally because I just I think
I was like looking at my life and you know,
it was this tiny little circle within this like circle
(38:27):
of pain. And after you know, I had a real
like mentality shift of like, Okay, no, my life is
the big circle and the pain is the little circle within.
You know, it's a huge, respective shit, it was huge,
and it changed so much.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
Because it before you were so consumed with the pain
because it's all consuming. So that was your world and
then you're like, no, this is not who I am,
right right, And it goes back to rufus eb detaching
from the feeling and really not naming it and it's
not the whole entire being of who you are, totally totally.
Speaker 2 (39:05):
And I think there was also, gosh, this this thought
of like I couldn't really live my life until I
was better. And now, like you know, there are still
like symptoms that I deal with a headache that I've
had for you know, years.
Speaker 1 (39:24):
But I wake up and like every day every day
you have a headache every day?
Speaker 2 (39:28):
Every day?
Speaker 4 (39:29):
You have a headache every day every day, Oh, Lisa, Yeah,
it's and but I'm okay, like I have learned to
compartmentalize that that.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
Pain and to recognize like if I I mean, I
still have hope that you know, I can get better.
But it's it's this idea that like, oh if I don't,
I can still live a beautiful, joyful, meaningful life.
Speaker 1 (39:56):
Yeah, that's a big, big moment. Oh gosh, to wrap
your head around.
Speaker 2 (40:02):
Literally, yeah, seriously, seriously.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
So, I mean just to live with chronic pain is
no joke.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
It's not fun, and I mean it really just makes
you just have a little grace for other people because
you don't know, like, you know, and it's one of
those things like the person looks fine and you so
you just don't know how much they're actually dealing with.
(40:30):
Like at the time, my husband was, you know, working
on his company, and so like I would like muster
up every bit of strength I had to like join
him for a dinner or an event or things like that,
and like, you know, you get your hair done and
you do your makeup, and like you look fine, but
you don't feel fine. And so I just I never
assume anything about anyone and I just try to walk
(40:53):
through life like that and just really have a little grace.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
So yeah, yeah, you just never know what someone is
going through.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
Never and everyone's going through something. Yeah, yeah, man, that's
a huge like I mean, it's a hard way to
get the understanding, but I mean that's a huge blessing
to have that understanding. And like what a loving soul
you are to like enter the world. I feel that
from you. When I am around you, I just feel
just like openness, Like you are just so loving. You
(41:25):
just have such a loving radiation for.
Speaker 2 (41:27):
Feeling is so mutual. I remember when I first met you,
and Brian and I were in the car on the
way home, and I was just like, gosh, she's such
great energy. We just such great energy all the time.
Speaker 1 (41:41):
Thank you. I mean I fail too, Like I recently failed.
I like let someone I was working with someone and
I just handled myself so poorly in the situation, and
I'm like, I've done so much work on myself, and
like when I like have a step back like that,
like I haven't had in so long, I'm like, oh,
do you ever like go into a spiral like a
self self talk spoilem, Like I'm a terrible person? Who
(42:02):
do I think I am?
Speaker 2 (42:03):
I'm such a fraud.
Speaker 1 (42:04):
Like I like totally panicked and like reacted and did
a handle myself awfully, and I'm just like, oh, I
can just fall down the shame sparrow so quickly. I
need res and b.
Speaker 2 (42:16):
I mean you know that you're like any time. It's
the same idea with with what we're talking about with repair.
Speaker 1 (42:24):
Like.
Speaker 2 (42:26):
I mean, we're humans, Like when you're in relationships, you
will make mistakes, Like that's what we do, like and
then how do we respond, you know, and that's that's
all we can do. That's all we can.
Speaker 1 (42:40):
Do, I know you I know, yeah, just kidding these
Like I think I had gone along a little while
without a real human moment. Like I've had a lot
of human moments, but they haven't been like coming from
me because I've been doing such a a I've been
trying so hard for so many years just to like
clean up my debris and my energy feel good, like
learn these things about life and act from a woman
(43:02):
state and not like a you know, damaged child and
like going back into my spirals and so like when
I have like I hadn't had a moment like this
in a while, and I'm like, oh, just a fail.
Speaker 2 (43:11):
I just fail.
Speaker 1 (43:13):
You know.
Speaker 2 (43:14):
We have a song about that, Like it's it's Failing
is vital.
Speaker 1 (43:24):
It's feel.
Speaker 2 (43:27):
Because because so long, because fail has notoriously been this ugly,
dirty world.
Speaker 1 (43:35):
That's how I feel. I feel ugly and I feel dirty,
you know, because it's like, oh, you're the failure instead
of someone else failing and you're dealing with the hardship
of the failure. Yes, you're the failure.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
Failure is vital to existence because there's no life without failure.
And like if we're not failing, we're not learning, you know,
like failure is important and it's it's again like why
we have a song about failure because you know, for
(44:07):
so many of us, like for our generation, it was
like like don't fail, like fee failing is bad and no,
failing is a part of life and if you can
embrace it and learn from whatever whatever it is, then
then you can move forward a better person than before. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:27):
Yeah, I know. We're always a work in progress, always
and you got to learn. Like that's once again, I'm
coming back to Rufersyn. I'm so happy I wrote this
book and have this series caming out because I'm like,
you got to learn these things. You need to have
tools to go back to, you know, you need to
have tools even as an adult, like to be able
to go back into that book and like identify this
and like maybe sing the song when I when it
(44:48):
comes out.
Speaker 2 (44:48):
When's the album coming out the October tenth. Okay, yes,
the artist is Tiny Prime and it's me and my
husband so good and the album is called Rufus and b.
Speaker 1 (45:00):
Rufus and b. But to have these tools and to
have them simple enough for a child to understand, that
means maybe some adults can understand it too, because it's
hard to get stuffed through our heads.
Speaker 2 (45:09):
You know, we can teach old dogs new trick. We can.
Speaker 1 (45:15):
We can. That's my hope for everyone listening. Listen, listen
to old dogs out there.
Speaker 2 (45:20):
I'm with you.
Speaker 1 (45:20):
I'm in the same club.
Speaker 2 (45:21):
We can learn too.
Speaker 1 (45:25):
It's not too late to be the best and brightest
version of ourselves and to learn and to rewire to
reevaluate that is.
Speaker 2 (45:33):
It's hard work.
Speaker 1 (45:34):
But it's crucial.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Never too late, never too late.
Speaker 1 (45:37):
I always wrap up with leave your Light. This has
been such a wonderful interview. I just have loved every
bit of it.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
Lisa, me too, Caroline, thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (45:44):
So glad you're here. What do you want people to know.
It's super open ended.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
Gosh, I feel like we've covered so much. I know,
love yourself. It's not about us or it's not about
it's about you. Whoever's listening, you know, it's it's about you,
and you gotta love yourself first.
Speaker 1 (46:14):
Amen.
Speaker 2 (46:15):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (46:16):
Okay, RUFS and B coming out October tenth.
Speaker 2 (46:18):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (46:19):
Where can everyone find it?
Speaker 2 (46:20):
Wherever you listen to music?
Speaker 1 (46:22):
Okay and if are U f us and B E
A E. I love it? Lisa hummy. Lisa Tucker comments perfect,
I love it, and check your music out too because
it's so good. Okay, you're the best.
Speaker 2 (46:34):
Bye bye,
Host
Caroline Hobby
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