March 16, 2025 • 58 mins
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r/JUSTNOMIL - My MIL bought me lingerie and a subscription to Match.com for my birthday
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Sam. This is a John your og
Okay Storytime podcast host, and we got some great stories
coming up. Before that, we have a quick two minute
break from the sponsors that keep the show a lot.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
My mother in law gave me inappropriate birthday gifts, so
we walked out on her.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Ooh, maybe you want to walk in? Why am I
so small?
Speaker 2 (00:16):
I off and hatter. Ope he starts off strong, longtime lurker,
first time poster, all that jazz. My mother in law
and I have never gotten along. My husband and I
were college sweethearts and got married three years ago. We've
been together for ten years total. No kids, no real
plans for kids right now because of my health. By
the way, this comes from Gray Whale Songs and if
you want to submit your own stories, go to the
(00:38):
r slash Okay Storytime stuffery. Though woods see, I was
diagnosed with cancer, a rare blood cancer. The treatment is
relatively light, though it's mostly maintenance. So dear husband and
I decided not to tell his family decided not to
tell the in laws because they're terrible. That's where we're at.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Okay, I mean, I guess if they have a terrible,
terrible relationship there. I think that makes sense, but I
don't know. It's also terrible, yeah, terrible, terrible. Then maybe
I would just feel bad not tell my mom I
had cancer. You know, true, Well.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
It's not you.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
I know, it's not me, but I can't help. But
but just place myself in these stories.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
It's true. That's true. So mostly because I'm pretty sure
that mother in law is a hypochondriac and as soon
as she hears about it, she'll suddenly have it the
next week two So effing exhausting. Anyways, back to the story.
My birthday was earlier this month. I didn't really want
to do too much, but dear husband wanted to take
me out to dinner, and somehow his parents decided to
(01:42):
tag along too. I have no clue why or how.
I'm assuming he mentioned it to his mom and passing
and she thought it would be fun to join it.
Wasn't called it from a billion miles away. Not m
gona be good.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Hubble space telescope eaten with the monster into space is
not fun.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Oh god. So dinner was good, as in the food
was good. Dear husband took me to my favorite place
in the city that has little sheerish curtains that wrap
around the booths, that make everything more romantic. Just what
you want with your seventy year old in laws. Oh yeah,
and intimate. Oh sadly, I had to see my mother
in law's face every time I looked. I'm looked up.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
I looked up from smooching your.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
Girl, and then you see granny, Yeah, big old granny
to face. Total mood removed from this planner. I almost
wanted to open the curtains because it was kind of awkward,
but I decided to drop it and focus on my
meal instead. After the waitress brought up our dessert, dear
husband said that he had a present for me when
we got home. Mother in law asked, why didn't bring it?
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Oh, this is a kind of present that only happens
in the bedroom. Oh god, dear mother in law. Valentine's
Day coming up.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
Call back to the title and what's about to happen?
But an I see in the comments. Dear husband got
a look on his face that I easily recognized the
do I tell her the truth or do I lie? Base?
He picked truth and told her that he did bring it,
but since they surprised and joined us, he thought he'd
give it to me at home. Why he even brought
(03:15):
it up, I will never know. Mother in law gets
all giddy and bouncing in her chair and says, open it,
open it, open it. Oh, she's like an effing four
year old on Christmas.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Well, you know, she doesn't know what it is, so
maybe she's just really excited.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
You know, Granny, you gotta listen. We talk about clear communications,
but every every once in a blue moon, you gotta
pick up on a hint. Yeah, you gotta pick up
on a hint every once in a while. Oh No,
you know, maybe she really didn't know.
Speaker 3 (03:46):
She does know what it is and is still excited.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
That would be concerning, terrifying. Yeah, Dierra's been shrugs, looks
at me for approval, and asked me to hand in
my purse. Confused, sneaky man had hit it in the
purse somewhere between the house and the restaurant. What a sweetie.
It was a very beautiful tennis bracelet with my favorite gemstones.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Okay, I feel like that's fine to open up within
a parental scrutiny.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
Sapphire's an amethys I gave him a hug, a quick
peck on the lips a big thank you we put
it on. It almost canceled out the bummer of the
in laws showing up. But then my mother in law
takes a giant effing needle and pops my happiness bubble
with one sentence, I brought a present for you too,
O pee.
Speaker 1 (04:37):
Is that that's fine? No?
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Why is that?
Speaker 1 (04:39):
I don't I don't see anything bad right now? Crap
besides them crashing the thing true crap f dang turtle farts.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Mother in law reaches under the table and prevents me
and presents me with a box, like one of those
thin clothing boxes that the department stores put their shirts in.
I was thinking it was a blouse or something. I
could handle a blouse, but she has this canary eating
smile on her face and is giggling intermittently. Yeah, it's
(05:09):
definitely not a blouse. I opened the box, and if
you read the title, you know what horrors are awaiting
me in there, Lingerie.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
You're that is a weird present. That is a weird present.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
I will say, not as weird as the father in
law getting that for you, I guess.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
So it could be worse. It could be worse. It
could be worse, but in front of everyone.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
In the restaurant, in front of in front of the
fan car. Yep, yep.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
I mean, I guess she just wants our little boy
to have a good time.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
God, who are you mothers? And why do you do?
Speaker 1 (05:50):
This's just trying to set that alley oop, you know,
set the mood at dinner so I can can do
a slam dunk.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
So he says, really, it's not like I even like,
I don't know, I'm trying to think of an inappropriate
time for a mother in law to buy her daughter
in law lingerie bridal shower. Maybe either way, it definitely
wasn't that just my birthday? I immediately blushed and I'm
pretty sure my mouth fell open. My mother in law,
Oh god, my mother in law started giggling more. Father
(06:24):
in law kept staring at his chocolate lava cake, not
looking up.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
I'm hoping to just disappear.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
Yeah, al he's worried.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
It's just gonna just get gorge out.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
His eyes getting ideas.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
Oh no, dang, why are we one upping each other
in the worst way today?
Speaker 3 (06:43):
Come on, come on, chili's lava cake? Tell me, tell
me that doesn't remind you know what it looks like.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
I don't know what it looks like.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
So de your husband is looking at me with a
what the F? Face? It was a black cagey body
suit type of thing. If I'm being completely honest, It's
probably something I would have bought for myself. It was
definitely cute, but no way I would want it. Now
Now it's effing taint tainted.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Come on, just get over it. At least mother in
law has good taste.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Yeah, yeah, Hey, I mean it could be worse.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
She get a bad taste.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
That's true, that's true. It could be a Corsett you know,
Victorian store or I guess.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Is it worse that she knows exactly what you want?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (07:22):
Why does she know exactly what her husbands want?
Speaker 1 (07:25):
Yeah, snow Wolf says she snooped. She's been having a
little little cameras making sure her little boy's game is
just top notch. I, unfortunately wouldn't be surprised. Yeah, I
got a little earpiece, oh son.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
A little to the right slower You got? You got?
You guys thought I was bad. We've got We've got
like late night streams. Hey, Florida John is here, but
late night stream Sam is here. That's that's the that's
the furthest level of unhinged. That's his far where as
it goes grab the head. Okay, so mother in law whisper, squeals,
(08:07):
Hold it up, Hold it up. What that's what you
say to her son?
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Come on, do you need one of those little blue
pills anymore?
Speaker 2 (08:18):
What? No, we're in a restaurant. She kind of pounces
and says, but there's more underneath.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
No, she doesn't need to give more. This is too much.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
I reached down under the tainted lingerie, which was about
three times too big. By the way, thanks mother in law.
It's not like I'm sensitive about my weight or anything.
And they pull out an envelope. More open it, open it,
open it from the peanut gallery, mother in law. I
had to physically stop myself from rolling my eyes. I
(08:49):
opened the envelope and it was a handwritten note from
her announcing that she had bought me a three month
subscription to match dot com for a third a three
month subscription. I don't know if that's a subtle hint.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
Like in three months, three months for what till it's
time to wrap it up, find a new lover?
Speaker 1 (09:12):
No, No, I think I think of anything. She's like, hey,
you could wear this nice lingerie to you and you
and hubbies new new match. You know you're looking for
a you're looking for a little little little unicorn.
Speaker 3 (09:27):
You know, how many grand babies? Does she want?
Speaker 1 (09:29):
A lot? He wants a lot?
Speaker 2 (09:31):
You're right, because if there's more women than more grand babies,
you can you can have two women back at the
same time, and then you just keeps hair.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
And then imagine they do a party of three even
more times. How many grand babies can you get the in?
Speaker 1 (09:45):
Yeah, exactly, You just keep you just keep adding people in.
That's true.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
Did I mention that I'm married to her son? Dear
husband was reading over my shoulder, and he snatched the
note out of my hand to read it over again.
I was really proud of him because he actually had
some spine and asked her what in the world was this?
They don't cuss. Cussing is very wrong. People who cuss
have the devil controlling the tongue.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Wait, and they're okay with a lingerie and party of
three's party of three.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Is of course some monages. Don't you say, don't you
dare say the word that's doodoo. But hey, you can
go cheat on your wife.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Maybe it's ethical non monogamy. That's kind of what it
sounds like, real ethical.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Her smile fell, and she said that she thought I
could use it. Why you ask, because she's heard that
we've been arguing a lot more lately. She wanted me
to know that she supports me in singlehood and there's
plenty of fish in the sea. Don't worry. Ope, I'm
sure you'll find someone who's perfect for you.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Woo wait.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
So yes, she heard arguing. She said, Hey, here's some lingerie,
here's a subscription match dot com. Good luck finding someone else.
You know, I've been with your with your son for
ten years. We're married, but you've been arguing. Wow, here
you go.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Alie says she couldn't spring for a hinge.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
That hilarious.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Yeah, oh, yep, dude, wild wild.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
I was speechless.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
Yeah me too.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
I would be too opie and really regretting not saying
f you to their no alcohol rule and getting the
dang glass of mine. Wow, they can't even drink wine
at the dinner with the parents.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
This mom is giving a laingeray at the dinner table.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Yep, this is wild. So logical, soological. Dear husband got
his act together before I did. He was very calm,
too calm, if you know what I mean. He said,
very steadily. Mom, we're not getting a divorce. We're very
happily married. You were at our wedding, you were at
our anniversary cookout, you were here at Opie's birthday celebration,
(11:58):
and you've seen how much we love each other. Opie
already found her perfect match me. She doesn't need this.
You should try and get your money back.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
I love how you's still concerned about her getting a refund, Like, no,
that's not that we don't want to, just like, hey,
you should really try to get a refund. I don't
know if they have like a thirty day return bymby.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Maybe they got some credit, you know, around your You
know which one's worse.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
So which one's worse Your mom giving you a subscription
to match dot com because she wants y'all to divorce,
or your mom thinking that y'all are so in love
but just need a little thing to spice up the
spice up your life, and so she wants you to
get a third.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
Honestly, I will take the third because basically, what at least.
The third is like, I am so cool with you
that I'm down to do something that, like everyone thinks
is weird to like help you guys find happiness. This
way is like, oh, yeah, you shouldn't be married to
my son.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
I guess you gotta get I guess that's It's like,
you're so about that what is definitely weirder? Can we
do a poll? Riley, divorce or third? Which which one
would you rather? Your mom be pushing for?
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Let us know?
Speaker 3 (13:12):
And in this way too, she she's fighting for the relationship.
She's like, I want you guys still stay together.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
He hands her a note and stands up. Getting out
of the booth. He says that he's sorry, but it's
time for us to leave. Thank god we've already paid
the check. Mother in law is buttering the dear husband
has never really been this stir on her before, and
before she can really form a sentence to the no stay,
but why gibberish, dear husband says, come on, mom, you
(13:40):
have to know how inappropriate that was. He pats her shoulder,
hats father in alow in the back and says, love
you guys, We'll see you later, and we both walk out,
leaving mother in law with a gaping maw and the
cursed box behind. I thought I was gonna say mag yeah,
But now it's a few days and I'm pissed. I've
(14:01):
had the time to stew on it and witch to
friends about it, And while they were all appalled and
supportive of me, both of them won the dang mother
in law lottery, so they couldn't really relate or have
any advice. What the heck do I do? Do I
confront her? Do I bury it and move on while
silently steaming? Do I send her a lingerie's subscription in
(14:22):
not her size anonymously? I'm stuck. Dear husband wants to
bury it and move on, build the wall a little higher,
maybe not see them or interact with them for a
little bit, and let that be that. I'm usually a
little more bullheaded than he is, but even I don't
like standing up to his mom. She took like a
year of law school before dropping out because prego with
(14:43):
dear husband. She still blames dear husband for why she's
not a lawyer, but that's a whole difference.
Speaker 1 (14:49):
She's starting a piece of freaking work.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
What a peach, and she thinks that she's twenty times
better and smarter than everyone else. Because of that, she
likes to argue. She practically lives for it. I don't
I like clear, concise and logical arguments. She likes semantics
and red herrings and being a effing C word. I'm
so over this. What would you do if you were me?
(15:13):
And there is a I'll read a quick edit y'all
showed in cool. Thanks for taking the time to read
and help me. I'm sorry if I don't respond to comment,
but I'll promise I'll be reading every single one. And
then we have the big update. I mean, we have
a big task.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
In a I'm excited for the big update.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
So basically, what should OPI do to answer question? Give
it like one month?
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Mob needs a time out for sure?
Speaker 2 (15:37):
For time out, and like, hey, if you do this again,
you're just gonna get more and more time and time out. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
And I think it sounds like there hasn't been boundaries
set up previously, and so this would be the first
step towards boundaries. But I don't think it's at the
point where necessarily you would completely cut off. But I
think what this moves is moving towards is low contact
(16:02):
yes to eventual no contact or they don't get the
message they got.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
Listen, mother in law needs to needs to wisen up
if she wants to keep them. But we have the
answers of what happens in this update. Okay, she sent
us a letter or should I say she sent dear
husband a letter? Yes, like snail mail. I'm gonna transcribe
it word for word, including spelling mistakes, excluding real names. Okay,
(16:26):
here it is.
Speaker 4 (16:27):
My dearest firstborn. I am deeply disappointed in your behavior
at dinner. I expected that type of disrespect from her, but.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
Never from you. Have you been sleeping well?
Speaker 4 (16:39):
I am worried for you.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Perhaps she has been introducing you to the devil more
than we thought.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
I pray for you every night. As your mother, I
feel it is my responsibility to warn you about the
women you sleep with. She is dangerous, son.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
Oh my god, you have no idea what she has.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
Been telling people behind your back. She is sneaky.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
My friend old Biddy from the church works at the hospital.
Speaker 4 (17:04):
UH and has seen her coming and going a lot lately.
Is she on substances? I think that she is stealing
the substances from the doctor there look on the news.
It is a common scam, and she is sneaky enough
to pull it off. I know you have been fighting
more because you won't answer me when I call anymore.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Oh my god. She's literally planting the seeds of deceits
within their relationship and using her mom network to like
spin lies. Yes, wow, wow, you know what this is.
I think this is uh uh, this is you got
the past code wrong again. I think this is now
like up to like two to four months of low contact.
(17:46):
But yeah again with a with a talk before. It's
like a talk before saying hey, this is why we're
distancing yourself from you.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
If if this kind of uh interaction happens again, it's
going to be longer.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Yeah. The second, the second we hear see even the
slightest whiff of anything anything even remotely close to this again,
until you dig yourself into a hole of no contact
and you can't come out. That's that and the thing.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
The reason that we're trying to push for this like
stare step low contact rather than no contact is something
we've seen again and again in these stories and from
people that we've talked to. It's like it's really really
tough to cut off family, like just like emotionally, and
so you want to make sure they deserve it because
(18:36):
it's no easy task. And something that people have said,
even when their parents have been terrible is that on
the bed where they drift off into the next life,
there's always a little guilt for not trying to make
things right, even if the parents were the ones who
did all the wrong. So that's why we're trying to
(18:56):
like just push against the total no contact.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
And I also feel like it will one It gives
her like a chance to try and like redeem herself,
and it kind of like way more clearly sets because
it can be so easy for them to manipulate and
do all these things if you clearly say, hey, look,
I'm basically gonna take a break from you for two
to four months and then we're gonna come back and
if anything changes, I'm gonna go. Now, at least it's
(19:22):
been so clearly communicated that they're like, Okay, I can't
like waffle something. I'll be like, oh, they can't feign
ignorance or they can they can't do it as much
as they did in the past.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Like it's yeah exactly, I mean it's it's it's actually justified.
It's actually it's actually justified. I think that's the point
we need to get to.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Yes, agree back to Opie's muzzle laws letter, and you
wouldn't have.
Speaker 5 (19:46):
Given her that knockoff bracelet. If you are still happy,
good stand up for yourself. I raised you to speak
your mind, just like your mama put her in her
place on the curb.
Speaker 4 (19:57):
My God, now you know what else to confront two Salonians.
Speaker 1 (20:02):
Three three, Oh, my God, the Bible.
Speaker 4 (20:07):
But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
And protect you from the evil one.
Speaker 4 (20:13):
I only gave her that gift to let her know
that I am on her. Of course, I did not
actually get her a subscription to that sinful sight. But
now she knows I know I'm watching her. She will
hurt you, and I will not stand for it. When
you were born, I hurt you in my arms, kiss
you on your head, and promise you to always protect you.
So here I am listen.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
To your mummy and let her go.
Speaker 4 (20:34):
A divorce is less sinful than staying with the devil.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
God will forgive you, dude, cap nuts.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
She is a psycho, dude, and imagine like using the
Bible as a way to just like twist and manipulate someone. Ah, dude, worse.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Oh yeah, yeah, the verse before that, and pray we
may be delivered from wicked and evil people, for they
for not everyone has fail. Well, first off, she's evil
and wicked. You should read the first before that.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Maybe you should look in the mirror a little, mama.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Stop stop biting God's flow. Okay, at least be original.
At a bare minimum, you could go Daniel nine to nine.
We got another one. The Lord of God.
Speaker 4 (21:18):
Is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him.
I need you to come back home. Your father was
just diagnosed with deadly cancer and shingles. I need you
to come home and help her out.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
She's trying, dude, She's using every trick in the book. First,
he's using the book, ye, the og book. And then
she's being like, oh, also, we have someone immediately ill
and you got to go and come with us and
take care of him. So she's like using every little
little little lever in her mom arsenal to make op underthumb.
Speaker 4 (21:52):
They do not know how to help. Family is most important,
and if you will not help them, then brother on
LAWNTU will not go to college. He will stay at
home and do your duty for you. Galatians six to two.
Rather banger carry each other's burdens, and in this way
you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Christ commands you to help.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
Dude. I love how many Bible verses she dropping.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
She I feel like she's just googling like random stuff
and just slapping this.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
The thing is also like, I mean this. So when
I was working on the Amish farm, like and like
was planning stuff with the other Amish kids, they would
just drop like Bible verses and and they're like chat,
and I didn't know how to respond, so I just
started dropping Bible versus back. So I think maybe OP
just start fights fire with fire, drop some like mean
(22:43):
Bible not mean, but like drop some just fire Bible
versus portant case.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
I feel like OP would at least have the intellect
to understand understanding then use it. You know.
Speaker 3 (22:51):
Also you could say Galatians six to five the three
verses later for each one should carry their own load.
Speaker 1 (22:58):
Oh oh yeah, stop worrying about my load and how
much I'm loading up.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
That's right, I can carry this load.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Mom, Yeah, let me carry it. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
Also, have you prayed about it? Or we just were
signing Bible verses?
Speaker 1 (23:12):
Are we do that?
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Yeah? Surface spacious.
Speaker 4 (23:17):
I will come over on Sunday after church to talk
over this more with you. Love you and see you soon,
Mommy and Daddy.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
I I don't know where to begin. I'm sorry, but
cancer and shingles? Did that strike anyone else's weird? My
husband is all kinds of upset and wants to hear
her out and help. If it's true, I get it,
but especially since she has a history of copying others diagnoses,
I'm feeling extra sketch. F Ugh, I knew she would
(23:44):
pull some crap like this. A quick edit. I forgot
to address this in my last post and hear no
contact isn't currently an option for us because of the
brother in laws. The husband's brothers both brother in law
still live at home with her. Brother in law too
is going to college in the fall, graduating high school soon.
Brother in law one is a professional student and still
in college. To catching brother in law one catches shrapnel
(24:07):
over there. Neither of them realizes they can tell her
not yet. She checks their phones and emails.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Oh my god, emails dude, she is a helicopter in.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
I mean she she went, she upgraded from helicopter just
full NSA like she is just in every.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
I mean, she's like omnipotent at this point.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
Omnipotent.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Omnipotent. She knows when you're sleeping, Who knows when you're awake?
Who knows that that lingerie is making a Valentine's date.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Getting a bun in the oven to bank So they're
not even allowed to close their room doors. They have
to tell her where they're going before they leave the house.
And while I can't prove it, I think she's tracking
them because they refuse to go anywhere other than where
they've told her. Dude, low key, I'm like, can we
(24:57):
call like adult Protective Services or somebody? Because this is
this is getting crazy. Dear husband and I have been
their safe spot. We've taught them about the birds and
the bees because she refused. We taught brother in law
how to drink responsibly because he wanted to join a
fraternity and we didn't want him to get booze poisoning.
They feel comfortable asking us questions and telling us things
that they can't tell their parents. I'm not going to
(25:19):
take that away from them, especially not from brother in
law too, because he is the black sheep of the family.
He gets the brunt of mother in law even more
than everyone else, which is crazy.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
How much she's already doing like that is too much,
too much.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
All of this is where dear husband is coming from too.
And yes, it took him a long time to break
away from his mother, so he understands them more than
I do. Plus he really loves his dad and doesn't
want to abandon him either. It's sadly not as black
and white as everyone I know, including myself, as what
that would be. Like. One more thing, father in law
(25:55):
isn't allowed to have.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
A cell phone, even he falls under the jurisdiction.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
How does it keep getting worse?
Speaker 3 (26:01):
Okay, some of this stuff happened to me. My grandfather
does have a cell phone. He's not not not not
allowed to. But that doesn't sound too crazy.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Yeah, but yeah, he's he's that's different. That's okay.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Okay, this this means he's like whipped.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
I mean to the to the extent of like blink twice.
If you're if you're doing good, for the love of God,
we're injuring that no wonder. He looked down at the cake.
Speaker 1 (26:26):
He's just like like, yes, ma'am, yes, wife, whatever you say.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
What you say, wife, Maybe I can have one text.
If I'm a good boy tonight, I.
Speaker 1 (26:36):
Take my letter to the carry out pigeon. This is allowed, Mama.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
I'll use disappearing in to make it fun and make
it special. Our only hope is to catch him at
home alone while she is not out with while she's
out with her girlfriends. She's usually at a brunch or
lunch after church with the old biddies. But since she's
planning on coming here tomorrow, I don't know if that's
after lunch or if she's canceled it to come and
(27:01):
harass us. I'm sorry, guys, I'm not trying to be difficult,
a difficult which. It's just a hard situation, and unlike
anything I've ever been in before, I really do appreciate
at least the camaraderie, even if it feels like there's
no reasonable options to offer. Again, I'm really sorry. I
feel bad for frustrating people with my problems. I've got
personal messages calling me uncooperative, and I promise I'm not
(27:23):
trying to be It is just Cray Cray complicated. We
have some comments from the people, but really quick, I
think I understand the uh trickiness of helping out the
two brothers, which it seems like one's graduating high school,
one seems to be older.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
Like Opie doesn't want to cut off the brothers from support.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
She doesn't want to right. I think that, uh, this
isn't a perfect solution, but just one thing to do
is go to both of the brothers and just be like, hey, guys,
I know it's like expensive, but I would start planning
and saving now to move out, because my God, will
you have a different life being able to live on
(28:09):
Let let let husbands speak to it. It's like, hey, listen,
that's my mom too. I'm now living living with with
op with my wife. This is a ten thousand times
better scenario for yourself, and like start preparing for it now,
because it's probably hard to think while they're in the
mom vortex of like breaking away. I think I think
they got to be the ones like, hey, there is
a path, but start saving and getting ready now. Yeah.
(28:32):
I agree.
Speaker 3 (28:33):
I've seen similar people kind of go through, maybe not
to this magnitude, yeah, but things like that where.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
They're a lighter version, maybe a lot.
Speaker 3 (28:40):
Of version, and like you know, they're in a Christian household,
and usually like whenever they're not allowed to like talk
talk about certain things or everything, they kind of get
out of hand. Like I'm so glad they warn them about,
you know, boo poisoning, like beer poisoning, cause like you
probably would have been like, I'm a drink until I
can't stand anymore, and who knows what would have happened
(29:01):
exactly exactly, I.
Speaker 1 (29:03):
Mean you wake up the next day, yeah, acking and
then he eric, where was.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
I Yeah, talking from a it sounds like a for
sure from experience. Well, we got some relevant comments we're
gonna dive into. So commentar number one, old biddy is
breaking hip a laws, the medical laws if you're in
the States, and and they take that very seriously. Any
way to rescue the brother in laws from her abuse,
(29:27):
how much longer do they have to deal with their crap?
Father in law is an adult, so there's less you
can do about him if he's deciding to live under
mother in law's thumb. It seems like this is more
of a matter of counting down the clock than one
immediate note contact to give in the restraints you've outlined,
Opie response. It's definitely a counting down the clock type situation,
just because both of us obviously really care and want
(29:49):
to be there for his brothers when they finally realize
they can tell mommy, no. We just don't know when
that clock will end. Brother in law one is already
in adults. Brother in law two is great graduating high
school this month. Both our slash will be attending university
where both father in law and I work. While that
complicates it even more wow, uh, OPI and the father
(30:09):
in law work together and where mother in law used
to work, it's obviously mostly brother in law two that
we're most concerned about helping right now, Even though brother
in law one is an adult and should be able
to handle himself. How he was raised has seriously stunted
his mental and emotional age.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Hmmm, that makes sense.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
He still lives at home and won't go anywhere that
deviates from what mommy says is okay, it's really hard
for me to watch. Dear husband did the same thing
when we were first dating, like the first few years,
and he still often finds himself slipping into old habits
and he's the most rebellious of the three. Oh, he
married his wife and moved in with her.
Speaker 1 (30:47):
Crazy.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
You'll be happy to know I've reported her to the hospital.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Oh, for a violation of HIPPA.
Speaker 2 (30:56):
They said they were glad I told them and that
they would take care of it. I don't know what
their plane is exactly, but she wasn't there when I
went in for an appointment last week. And we have
another update.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Oh, another update.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Oh yeah, we have maybe even even more.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
Yeah. So it sounds like no contact is not an
option because you want to stay. But I still think
you can give the support that is needed for the
brothers while going low contact.
Speaker 2 (31:24):
I agree, And yeah, I think you got to like
just really really really hammer home the message to the
brothers is like leave.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
Nicole h says, Do they work at BUYU? Is that
the college?
Speaker 2 (31:37):
Possible?
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (31:37):
Because families, like literally the whole family work there. Yeah,
it could be, It really really could be. But let's
get into updates number two.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
Hey, it's Sam, your og host. Here. We're gonna get
back to the stories. But here's three minutes of ads
from our sponsors.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Okay, so this is gonna be relatively short because dear
husband and I have a lot to talk about, but
I needed some time to decomp us first, and my
way of decompressing is type. In all this crapout, Mother
in law came after church, just like she threatened in
her letter. Dear husband called the house to try to
talk to father in law around the time he knew
she should be headed this way, but brother in law
(32:15):
too informed us that father in law was coming as well. Awesome,
dear husband and I decided to throw keeping my health
a secret out the window. I donned a surgical mask
and we agreed to not let them in the house,
just in case. No one here should be surprised that
deadly cancer and shingles was a massive exaggeration. Father in
(32:36):
law has a rash on his flank and back. That's it.
He hasn't even gone to the doctor yet. He has
an appointment with his primary care physician on Monday. Mother
in law flipped her lid when we told her the
reason I was in a mask and we were on
the porch was because I gosp do have cancer. She
(32:57):
called me a copycat and drama queen. How effing rich
is that? Which sucks because she's always the one copying people.
But it just so happened that like Opie literally did
have cancer. They previously decided not to tell her, and
now she gets to be like, WHOA.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
This is infuriating.
Speaker 2 (33:18):
I asked her what her hospital friend told her, and
she continued to exist, insists that I was a pill thief.
So who knows either way? I'm still calling my on
colleges tomorrow and letting her know. Father in law didn't
know that. Mother in law had threatened to keep a
brother in law too, brother too away from college if
dear husband didn't return her home. Wow, this was the
(33:42):
first time I've seen him look mad in her presence.
He told her that would never happen and practically begged
us not to worry about it. Mother in law brushed
him off and said it was a joke. It was
a joke. Typical. Excuse me while I go find my eyes,
which just rolled right off. I roll to the maximum.
Speaker 1 (34:01):
I mean, dude, well, at least at the very least,
I feel like father in law is now pushing back.
I feel like he's had a little spaghetti noodle spine
for the first half of the story or up until
this point. Really and now finally like this. I feel
like his his spine is is slowly like the waters
(34:22):
leaving it, and it's turning into like the spaghetti spaghetti
right before you put it in the pot. You know,
it's like before the pot is like nice and firm,
and it's still breakable, like it's not like but he's
getting there. But it's getting there, you know. It's it's
increasing in uh uh in lack of just noodleliness.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
Where we might get to the point where we can't
break it in half.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
Yeah, I mean, I mean, uh hopefully, Well, one day,
one day, we can only dream, we can only dream,
we'll see this.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
Might this might be his never long bottom moment. Shout
out to Harry Potter. Mother in law also went on
this really dimented tirade about how rude I was for
not taking her birthday present home, just like we assumed.
She tried to say it was a joke. It was
a joke. Apparently the whole letter was also a joke.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
Yeah, dude, that was that was so funny.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Yeah, why don't she become a meet comedian?
Speaker 1 (35:14):
Mom drop all these jokes old Bible verses, Everyone will laugh.
Speaker 2 (35:19):
I did bring up that her pastor would probably not
how would not like how strongly she was advocated tell
her pastor, honor fire.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Let's go get it kicked out.
Speaker 2 (35:32):
Dude, you're giving her lingerie, you're signing her from match
dot com. She's married, and you're pushing for Oh, dude,
should kicked out of the church.
Speaker 3 (35:39):
Yeah, dude, you could be good because if you go
up to her say hey, this is wrong, and then
you bring a couple of friends, Hey this is wrong,
and she still doesn't listen, you can bring you to
the church. Get it kicked out.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
I will go straight to the church asap.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
Well. The Bible says you you have to do three steps.
It's like you talk to them one on one. If
they don't listen, you talk to them with a group
of friends.
Speaker 1 (35:57):
They already talked to them one on one group of friends.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
Were in a group right now. Yeah we're brothers.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
Yea, yeah, yeah, we're in a group. She's not listening. Okay, Okay,
I think I think we can go all the way
to the top.
Speaker 2 (36:09):
We've got the fast pass lace.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
Yeah, yeah, straight.
Speaker 2 (36:12):
To the big boss. She looked like she wanted to
snap my head off, but after glancing at dear husband
and seeing his strong face. She immediately switched from anger
to crying and grabbed dear husband's hands. She said that
she worried for his salvation and that she would stop
joking about me being the devil if I would prove
(36:32):
it to her and be baptized in her church. What
At this point I decide and said that I would
think about it. I just wanted her to stop. I
told her that all I wanted was for us to
all get along, and especially given my health, I would
(36:53):
really appreciate it if she would back off. Dear husband
backed me up and said that her Shanigan's we're only
adding to our stress. He also told her that we
haven't been fighting, We've just been spending more time together
since my diagnosis. Yeah, he's not answering your calls because
he's spending time with his wife who has cancer. A
(37:17):
mother in law. Looks like we did the old one? Dude,
did we do tour straight in the guts? She sniffled
and said that she guessed if I couldn't handle her
sense of humor.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
But he's not humor. You're gaslighting everyone.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Honestly, Honestly, I want to get a I want to
do the church thing right afterwards. I want to get
a comedic tour agent a comment to her agent to
pay him to say, hey, listen, listen, lady, you got talent.
I've been hearing all the jokes you've been telling. Yeah,
and we're about to put you in theaters one, two,
three thousand people, and we're gonna just let you go.
(37:54):
We're just gonna let you just do your thing.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
But ideally maybe in like a t where they stone
bad comedians.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
God, I was tomatoes.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
I don't know if anyone does tomatoes. I think it's
it's like the classic thing.
Speaker 2 (38:11):
Yeah, that was so.
Speaker 1 (38:13):
Yeah, it was like nineteen hundreds. I think ye.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
Now stones is more recent.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
Well, no, the people are still using stones. Stones are
the original people are still using stones. It's either there's
no way between. It's either booze or stones or booze.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
Let's let's let's do some some good old fashioned booze.
Don't destroy her, destroy her, you know, I want to
sense itself for pride. Listen, she's got a lot of pride.
That's that's a sin.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
I think we need to break it up her.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
All right. While Sam creates a new stolen golden rule
around new stone rule, she said, if I couldn't handle
her sense of humor, then maybe she just wouldn't joke
with me anymore. Thank you, I would love that perfect
Take your passive aggressive crap and stuff it. We click it.
We quickly discussed brother two's upcoming high school graduation party
(39:03):
with the whole family. She suggested that I not go
because of the cancer, and we're back. That took all
of point one seconds. Yeah, I told her, it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
Just one little like a ring around the rosie.
Speaker 2 (39:17):
Come on, infinite, I told her no way in heck
when I missed that. Brother in law two has already
told me how much it means to him that I
would be there. He sees me as a supportive big sister,
and I refuse to let her scare me out of
being there for him. Of course I didn't say that.
I just told her that my cancer isn't contagious, and
my doctor says that as long as I feel well,
(39:39):
I can continue living my life. How I like.
Speaker 1 (39:42):
Okay, CBF means certified bunk funk.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
Yeah, I like.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
Bunk funk.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
It sounds like a new genre I want to start.
Oh well, Opie says. Dear husband told her that we
have lunch plans and we have to go. He hugged
father in law and asked him to please let us
know Monday what the doctor says again about the rash
not cancer, and jingles. Mother in law hoffed on out
to her car and barked at father in law to
come along when he went to hug me. She's such
(40:14):
a witch man. People have asked for a backstory and
how we all got to this place, and I'll write
it out after dear husband and I get a chance
to talk about all of the current crap. Turns out
writing is very cathartic for me, and getting advice about
prior crap would not only benefit me, but others in
my situation that are reading. Everyone who's commented on my
(40:35):
post with uplifting advice and comments, Thank you, thank you,
thank you. You have no idea how helpful it is
for me. The whole thing with mother in law has
felt very lonely, and talking about it with people here
is such a relief. It means the world to me. Also,
anyone who thinks I'm faking it in the comments. As
you can see in my profile, I've been on Reddit
for over a year.
Speaker 1 (40:53):
Yeah, I got credit I got. I got karma.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
M mostly reading in this form for advice. Didn't post
here before my dinner incidents because I didn't feel like
she was bad enough for some of the mother in
laws out there. And I also didn't feel like I
was good enough as some of the daughter in laws
here with shiny spines and excellent comebacks. I'm not good
with confrontation, especially with her. I did read some of
the stories my life is being compared to, but I
(41:18):
guessed I missed the big fake reveal. Either way, the
fact that my husband is two brothers that we love
and want to help however we can does not mean
my life is a lie. My dad has two younger brothers.
Too many have two younger siblings.
Speaker 1 (41:31):
We got an update three, We.
Speaker 2 (41:32):
Got an update three coming up. We got an UPDA
three coming ab. So keep your seat belts buckled, keep buckle.
Speaker 3 (41:39):
I say, you know, play a little devil and spread
some rumors around the church and then step away.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Some church rumors. They wouldn't do that. They wouldn't spread gossip.
Speaker 3 (41:51):
Oh yeah, no, they definitely would not gossip.
Speaker 2 (41:54):
Where the gospel is I love the gospel.
Speaker 3 (41:57):
Gossip or you don't even have to go cherges, go
to herresser.
Speaker 1 (42:01):
It's true.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
Oh and also he says, we're not going to adopt them,
not gonna adopt the brothers. I can never imagine mother
in law randomly abandoning them. She's insanely possessive. Why would
she do that? And yes, kids that are treated the
way mother in law raised her boys are very hesitant
about making their parents angry and triggering a rampage from them,
even if those kids should have grown up already. Please,
(42:24):
I understand people being hesitant after finding out people relying
on here. That's sick and infuriating. Ask me any question
you want. I'll try to answer them all. But please
don't go to the other side and talk crap about me.
It reminds me too much of my gossipy mother in law.
And we have update number three. Do we have any
predictions any conspiracy theory? Icee us going into what I
(42:46):
believe is the final chapter.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
I mean, I think we can predict with some level
of certainty that the mother in law is not done
with her shenanigans. The shenanigans will continue until the day
that she is relieved from her duty of being a
mother in law. So I think we're in for a
little bit more of the same.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
Yeah, I think you know what long long long shot
I've been I've been going for the long shot conspiracy
theories lately. You know, when they start with something like
pretty awful and then they end up in jail hip
of violations. Okay, I I'm just gonna I'm just gonna
yeat a jail. I'm gonna yeat a jail.
Speaker 1 (43:30):
Conspiracy theory out there, damn all right, I'm ready. I'm
ready to see some jail, right, already, some some jail.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
Well, let's see it. An update number three. Hey guys,
I'm sorry. Hey, I'm sorry it's been so long for
this update. It's been a busy week. Also, I know
I understand the need for nicknames. I'm calling her the
lingerie and mother in law buying prank. Mother in law
doesn't exactly roll off the tongue. That didn't at all.
(43:57):
And I know a lot of people don't want to
read a backstory, but it would obviously be best if
everyone knew which crazy twatch they were reading about slash
advising about this time. I'm not too good at this,
but I'll try to think up one for you. Guys
to make it less worthy and straight to the point
next time. So first things first, head update, I did
report the nosy biddy who works at the hospital, her
(44:18):
mother in law's agent who was spilling the beans. Yep,
they were very apologetic and told me that they would
get taken care of.
Speaker 1 (44:26):
I'll theygive it. Put some of the mad shoes on
that mother in law. Oh God, make us sleep with
the fishes.
Speaker 2 (44:33):
Oh baby. I obviously have no idea what they're doing
exactly to take care of it, but I didn't see
her at the hospital when I went in last Friday
for my latest blood letting session. Hopefully she's learned her
lesson with whatever they did to her. As for lovely
mother in law, as I mentioned in my last post,
father in law just had a rash most likely definitely
(44:55):
not deadly cancer and shingles. Well maybe shingles, but no
way is this tiny rash whatever the heck deadly cancer
was supposed to mean. Everyone I roll with me at once.
I know he went to the doctor, but we surprisingly
haven't heard anything back yet. I'm guessing that means good
news that the whole thing was probably a ruse set
(45:16):
up by mother in law. To try and trick us
read deer husband into forgiving her since she found out
about my cancer. No, you see, the sad part is
that deer husband is already slipping and wants to just
act like everything's normal. So he's our spines are back
to water again from from the spaghetti and cook spaghetti.
Speaker 1 (45:38):
Dude, grow a freaking' spine? Yeah, this is why why
can't he? Honestly, this is this is getting what's wrong
with this guy?
Speaker 2 (45:45):
If this continues, this is getting into the territory of like, hey,
I don't know if I can be with you if
you're not going to stand up and you know, get
some space and distance. Come on, But I guess I'm
not allowed to talk about that here, am I Is
it okay if I post on just so single? I
(46:06):
don't know even if I'm posting, and I'm not sure
I make it just a complete just no. I think
I've seen people here do that before. But I can't remember.
My memory isn't what it used to be. I practically
have a photographic memory now. It's like if it wasn't
significant or don't write it down, it just poofs into
never never land. And I don't want to span the forms.
There's obviously many people with many other problems. This coming
(46:27):
weekend is the graduation party for brother in law too,
and I know dear husband wants to go. I want
to go too. I love the kid, and I don't
want to let him down. I also want don't want
to deal with the effing kraken in middle aged lady form.
So decisions decisions. Should we go to the party or
NA go to the party or nah. I don't think
(46:51):
it necessarily moves the needle on helping anything.
Speaker 1 (46:53):
No, but I just want to make sure that the
brothers feel supported.
Speaker 2 (46:59):
Yeah, because it is his I believe it's this graduation party.
Speaker 1 (47:01):
Yeah, And like I feel like, you know, if you
don't go, that's who's I think it's punishing the brother
more than it is the parents.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
I think you're right, you know, I think you're right
because if it was just a random like, oh we're
getting together, we're doing like a backyard barbecue, skip it,
don't deal with mother in law. But this is gonna
mean it's gonna mean the world to him. Yeah, seventy
five percent of chapter I.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
Would go to the party of the party. It's your
it's mostly for your brother.
Speaker 2 (47:29):
There we go, there we go. So that's where. That's
where we've landed. But let's see what you land After
all that being said, quite a few people asked how
it all started between me and my ballsy mother in
law my post. I have an effing decades worth of
stories at this point, but I will start with the beginning,
although it's a little bit nighn comparatively. Dear husband and
(47:51):
I met at work ten years back. We both had
summer jobs at the large theme park in our state's
big city. Dude, if it's b yu.
Speaker 3 (47:58):
Whoa whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa, were
you working at Dollywood? Because I mean, like this makes sense.
They work at Dollywood, they go to like a Baptist
church or like some not Pescatarian Presbyterian church, something like that,
and this happens, you got like a crazy you meet
a mad old lady.
Speaker 1 (48:15):
Dude, this could be your hometown.
Speaker 2 (48:17):
I could see it is I could see it. Here's
John here, og host here. We're gonna get back to
the stories, but here's a quick three minute break of
ass from our sponsors. It was his second year there,
it was my first so he wound up being my mentor.
We were dating within a month. Both of us were
in college, but I was his first girlfriend, and for
the life of me, I could not figure out why
(48:37):
until I read his parents, which ended up happening way
earlier than either of us expected. So we were both
living with our parents for the summer, well him full time,
but that's another story. And as fate would have it,
our parents lived only a neighborhood apart, literally one major
street separating us. So one night after work, at the
beginning of our official dating day, dear husband is making
(49:01):
fun of the way I drove home. Apparently his way
was better or something. He told me that he would
show me the right way to drive home from the
city and to follow him. Okay, so I'm behind him
the whole way back until we get to that major
street and then he turns right into his neighborhood. I
drive straight through and go left, and to mind, he
doesn't see me go left though, he just sees me
(49:21):
go straight. The next morning, we both show up for
our ship and he starts giving me crap about how
I didn't do it right. I didn't follow him all
the way home, you see, he thought I lived in
the neighborhood behind his now in front. He was expecting
me to use his neighborhood as a shortcut, basically, but
he never said that, so I didn't know, and that's
why that's what he thought. I was just thinking, Okay,
this kid wants me to come over to his house
(49:42):
a game on. Well that afternoon, we leave at the
same time once again, drive behind him. This time I
do as he says. I fall him all the way home,
literally to his driveway, and I'm laughing as I get
out of the car, picking on him for telling me
to do this, and how this look of horror was
on his face, and he just starts whispering for me
to leave. Now I don't.
Speaker 1 (50:03):
I don't know cute yet.
Speaker 2 (50:05):
The beast is home.
Speaker 1 (50:08):
She's slithering hope, he's saying, how they met?
Speaker 2 (50:12):
I So what we're happening right now is the fateful
day that this all began. Mother in law is slinking,
her claws dragging against the hard tile behind the door,
and and he's literally is like, run run because she's
at his house.
Speaker 1 (50:32):
Now.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
Booky, if mother in law comes out, it's gonna be
game over. I'm totally confused. But obviously I've done something wrong,
So I start apologizing, backing up to my car when
I hear this screech of come from the front door. Confirmed. Uh,
(50:54):
I'm gonna be right there, because only dogs could hear
that effing pitch.
Speaker 3 (50:59):
But sh I get it.
Speaker 2 (51:01):
His mom comes rushing around the corner, arms out ready
for a hug, and I swear stops passed away in
her tracks, and her face falls when she sees that
he's not alone, and worse, there's a girl with him.
Speaker 1 (51:14):
Oh no, I don't share my He's gonna be taken away.
Speaker 2 (51:19):
I can. I can never forget how big of a
tone change there was when she stopped and said, who
ah you to me? Dude? I totally I about crapped
my pants. She was scary as heck, but I tried
to play it off, and I said I was a
coworker of dear husbands and O wouldn't you know see
(51:39):
my parents live right across the street. And he told
me to follow him all the way home. See here
I am. Huh so I did? She cut me off
and turned to him to ask him why would he
invite a girl over without asking her permission first? Huh?
Isn't he on like two year two of college when
he said that he didn't invite me over, I swear
(52:00):
smoke started coming out of her ears because now I
was a liar and a stalker and I followed him
home for no reason. I will say, I'm now seeing
why she gave the gift of the laundry in match
dot com.
Speaker 1 (52:18):
Because she thought she was like stalking.
Speaker 2 (52:22):
From the first from the first second she met her,
she just decided that, like, I mean, it would have
been any woman, but like and then especially the way
she's like, oh, yeah, I followed him home. She's like, oh,
you're a stalker.
Speaker 1 (52:34):
Oh, and she's never let go of that.
Speaker 2 (52:36):
Never, Never, what happened?
Speaker 3 (52:39):
What happened to like opening people with loving arms?
Speaker 2 (52:42):
Nope, no, no, no, we have to turn them away.
You want bread, you get eat dirt. Dirt's delicious. It's
full of minerals. That's that's what mother in law said.
Mother in law was Jesus.
Speaker 1 (52:57):
Dirt my brothers and sisters.
Speaker 2 (52:59):
My brother and crassed pickupusses of hand of sand and
chomped down. So now I'm waving my arms while walking
closer and saying no, no, no, that's not how I
went at all. It's not what it looks like. I
just wanted to shake her hand and meet formally and
show her that I was a good girl. But I
didn't know one thing. His mother hates tattoos like hate,
(53:21):
hate hate tattoos. The photography team also worked the airbrush
tattoo booth, and that day had been my day, so
I had stamples of temporary tattoos all over my arms.
Speaker 1 (53:38):
Oh no, no, airbrush kitten, the mob's gonna be like.
Speaker 4 (53:43):
And she has tattoos?
Speaker 2 (53:45):
Who is this floozy? Turns out that even even temporary
spray paint tattoos are of the devil. And I had
wondered why dear husband never had airbrush tattoos on like
everyone else did when he worked at that booth, and
me waving my colorful arms around just made everything ten
(54:06):
times worse. She backed up quickly from me, recoiling like
I was a copperhead striking at her. Her face scrunched
and jumbled up so much it was practically unrecognizable. She
stopped me from trying to take her hand hand and
effing whispered, what ah, those guys devil on your arm?
(54:28):
The devil exists? And he is an ambrush kitten named Whiskers. Guys,
I really don't think I could have been more shocked.
I said, oh what, my arms like a dumb butt.
But you cannot be a dumb butt. You can be
the smartest parent cheeks this side of the Mississippi. And
(54:49):
how would they do that? Sam?
Speaker 1 (54:51):
Here go look up Okay, story time wherever they get
their podcast?
Speaker 2 (54:58):
Type it in, listen to full episodes of stories just
like this. But ladies and gentlemen, we are quickly approaching
the end of the story.
Speaker 1 (55:06):
Yeah, but.
Speaker 2 (55:08):
Let's say, what what should we do now? Knowing even
more back? Do we just assume from the beginning? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (55:15):
I mean, it seems like this has been a problem
for so long, from the inception of the relationship. And
I'm surprised they didn't put out boundaries earlier. That's what
I'm surprised.
Speaker 2 (55:26):
Yeah, it seems like reading in between the lines, husband
never really stood up very strongly before the incident with
the Landerie.
Speaker 1 (55:35):
Know how to he man is a floppy sandwich.
Speaker 2 (55:38):
It was it was a I mean, she legit raised
a cults of kids that would just not do what
they what they think is right. Just what mommy, Just
what mommy is?
Speaker 1 (55:49):
What mommy says, Mommy says, Simon says, what mommy says.
Speaker 2 (55:54):
Simon says, give me your location at all times.
Speaker 1 (55:57):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (55:58):
And even if you're with your wife, that's terrible, that
is full of sin. How dare you marry a woman
and stay faithful to her and have a beautiful, loving
relationship and live together? Gross unaccepted.
Speaker 1 (56:09):
Honestly, let's see.
Speaker 2 (56:10):
Let's see our our end faithale here, our faith faithale.
She starts backing up from me again, but she's talking
to dear husband now, only this time in a low,
growy whisper. She's telling him that he better make me
leave and get inside right now. I was obviously a
very bad girl who shouldn't be around him at all,
and if he wasn't inside within the next two minutes,
(56:32):
she was going to call the police on me for
trespassing on her property. What the actual f I rushed
back to my car and said, it's no problem. I'm
leaving right now, bye, dear husband, see you later, and
I sped away as she stared at me from the doorway.
When I got home, I told my mom what had happened,
and there was no way in heck, I was going
to continue dating that boy. His mom is crazy and
(56:54):
that's how I first met future mother in law a
full non contact I.
Speaker 1 (57:01):
Mean, with this backstory, I'm like, or do why would
you even want to know it? Not to divorce, but
with his backstory, I don't even know why you would
like want to have this mother in law anywhere near
your life like I would have. I feel like I
would have cut her off way earlier. Yeah, this is
this is Yike's territory, and I.
Speaker 2 (57:20):
Was thinking, like divorce if he because ten in ten years,
he hasn't grown the backbone like he kind of needs to.
Oh yeah, I schedule right now. Bye. But I mean
if he if he can, that's great, But like, I
don't know if Opie deserves another second after ten years
of this.
Speaker 1 (57:38):
Yeah, it's just so much. It's just so much. But
I would love to know what you guys would do.
Would you distance yourself from the mother in law even more?
Would you go no contact? Low contact? Would you report
this mother lot to the church? What would you do?
I would love to know what you.
Speaker 2 (57:54):
Think, But that is sadly the end of this episode.
Speaker 1 (57:57):
So if you love us, make sure to subscribe.
Speaker 2 (57:59):
We love you and see you tomorrow.
Hey, this is Sam. This is a John your og
Okay Storytime podcast host, and we got some great stories
coming up. Before that, we have a quick two minute
break from the sponsors that keep the show a lot.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
My mother in law gave me inappropriate birthday gifts, so
we walked out on her.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Ooh, maybe you want to walk in? Why am I
so small?
Speaker 2 (00:16):
I off and hatter. Ope he starts off strong, longtime lurker,
first time poster, all that jazz. My mother in law
and I have never gotten along. My husband and I
were college sweethearts and got married three years ago. We've
been together for ten years total. No kids, no real
plans for kids right now because of my health. By
the way, this comes from Gray Whale Songs and if
you want to submit your own stories, go to the
(00:38):
r slash Okay Storytime stuffery. Though woods see, I was
diagnosed with cancer, a rare blood cancer. The treatment is
relatively light, though it's mostly maintenance. So dear husband and
I decided not to tell his family decided not to
tell the in laws because they're terrible. That's where we're at.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Okay, I mean, I guess if they have a terrible,
terrible relationship there. I think that makes sense, but I
don't know. It's also terrible, yeah, terrible, terrible. Then maybe
I would just feel bad not tell my mom I
had cancer. You know, true, Well.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
It's not you.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
I know, it's not me, but I can't help. But
but just place myself in these stories.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
It's true. That's true. So mostly because I'm pretty sure
that mother in law is a hypochondriac and as soon
as she hears about it, she'll suddenly have it the
next week two So effing exhausting. Anyways, back to the story.
My birthday was earlier this month. I didn't really want
to do too much, but dear husband wanted to take
me out to dinner, and somehow his parents decided to
(01:42):
tag along too. I have no clue why or how.
I'm assuming he mentioned it to his mom and passing
and she thought it would be fun to join it.
Wasn't called it from a billion miles away. Not m
gona be good.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Hubble space telescope eaten with the monster into space is
not fun.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Oh god. So dinner was good, as in the food
was good. Dear husband took me to my favorite place
in the city that has little sheerish curtains that wrap
around the booths, that make everything more romantic. Just what
you want with your seventy year old in laws. Oh yeah,
and intimate. Oh sadly, I had to see my mother
in law's face every time I looked. I'm looked up.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
I looked up from smooching your.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
Girl, and then you see granny, Yeah, big old granny
to face. Total mood removed from this planner. I almost
wanted to open the curtains because it was kind of awkward,
but I decided to drop it and focus on my
meal instead. After the waitress brought up our dessert, dear
husband said that he had a present for me when
we got home. Mother in law asked, why didn't bring it?
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Oh, this is a kind of present that only happens
in the bedroom. Oh god, dear mother in law. Valentine's
Day coming up.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
Call back to the title and what's about to happen?
But an I see in the comments. Dear husband got
a look on his face that I easily recognized the
do I tell her the truth or do I lie? Base?
He picked truth and told her that he did bring it,
but since they surprised and joined us, he thought he'd
give it to me at home. Why he even brought
(03:15):
it up, I will never know. Mother in law gets
all giddy and bouncing in her chair and says, open it,
open it, open it. Oh, she's like an effing four
year old on Christmas.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Well, you know, she doesn't know what it is, so
maybe she's just really excited.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
You know, Granny, you gotta listen. We talk about clear communications,
but every every once in a blue moon, you gotta
pick up on a hint. Yeah, you gotta pick up
on a hint every once in a while. Oh No,
you know, maybe she really didn't know.
Speaker 3 (03:46):
She does know what it is and is still excited.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
That would be concerning, terrifying. Yeah, Dierra's been shrugs, looks
at me for approval, and asked me to hand in
my purse. Confused, sneaky man had hit it in the
purse somewhere between the house and the restaurant. What a sweetie.
It was a very beautiful tennis bracelet with my favorite gemstones.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Okay, I feel like that's fine to open up within
a parental scrutiny.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
Sapphire's an amethys I gave him a hug, a quick
peck on the lips a big thank you we put
it on. It almost canceled out the bummer of the
in laws showing up. But then my mother in law
takes a giant effing needle and pops my happiness bubble
with one sentence, I brought a present for you too,
O pee.
Speaker 1 (04:37):
Is that that's fine? No?
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Why is that?
Speaker 1 (04:39):
I don't I don't see anything bad right now? Crap
besides them crashing the thing true crap f dang turtle farts.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Mother in law reaches under the table and prevents me
and presents me with a box, like one of those
thin clothing boxes that the department stores put their shirts in.
I was thinking it was a blouse or something. I
could handle a blouse, but she has this canary eating
smile on her face and is giggling intermittently. Yeah, it's
(05:09):
definitely not a blouse. I opened the box, and if
you read the title, you know what horrors are awaiting
me in there, Lingerie.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
You're that is a weird present. That is a weird present.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
I will say, not as weird as the father in
law getting that for you, I guess.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
So it could be worse. It could be worse. It
could be worse, but in front of everyone.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
In the restaurant, in front of in front of the
fan car. Yep, yep.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
I mean, I guess she just wants our little boy
to have a good time.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
God, who are you mothers? And why do you do?
Speaker 1 (05:50):
This's just trying to set that alley oop, you know,
set the mood at dinner so I can can do
a slam dunk.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
So he says, really, it's not like I even like,
I don't know, I'm trying to think of an inappropriate
time for a mother in law to buy her daughter
in law lingerie bridal shower. Maybe either way, it definitely
wasn't that just my birthday? I immediately blushed and I'm
pretty sure my mouth fell open. My mother in law,
Oh god, my mother in law started giggling more. Father
(06:24):
in law kept staring at his chocolate lava cake, not
looking up.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
I'm hoping to just disappear.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
Yeah, al he's worried.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
It's just gonna just get gorge out.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
His eyes getting ideas.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
Oh no, dang, why are we one upping each other
in the worst way today?
Speaker 3 (06:43):
Come on, come on, chili's lava cake? Tell me, tell
me that doesn't remind you know what it looks like.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
I don't know what it looks like.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
So de your husband is looking at me with a
what the F? Face? It was a black cagey body
suit type of thing. If I'm being completely honest, It's
probably something I would have bought for myself. It was
definitely cute, but no way I would want it. Now
Now it's effing taint tainted.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Come on, just get over it. At least mother in
law has good taste.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Yeah, yeah, Hey, I mean it could be worse.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
She get a bad taste.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
That's true, that's true. It could be a Corsett you know,
Victorian store or I guess.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Is it worse that she knows exactly what you want?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (07:22):
Why does she know exactly what her husbands want?
Speaker 1 (07:25):
Yeah, snow Wolf says she snooped. She's been having a
little little cameras making sure her little boy's game is
just top notch. I, unfortunately wouldn't be surprised. Yeah, I
got a little earpiece, oh son.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
A little to the right slower You got? You got?
You guys thought I was bad. We've got We've got
like late night streams. Hey, Florida John is here, but
late night stream Sam is here. That's that's the that's
the furthest level of unhinged. That's his far where as
it goes grab the head. Okay, so mother in law whisper, squeals,
(08:07):
Hold it up, Hold it up. What that's what you
say to her son?
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Come on, do you need one of those little blue
pills anymore?
Speaker 2 (08:18):
What? No, we're in a restaurant. She kind of pounces
and says, but there's more underneath.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
No, she doesn't need to give more. This is too much.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
I reached down under the tainted lingerie, which was about
three times too big. By the way, thanks mother in law.
It's not like I'm sensitive about my weight or anything.
And they pull out an envelope. More open it, open it,
open it from the peanut gallery, mother in law. I
had to physically stop myself from rolling my eyes. I
(08:49):
opened the envelope and it was a handwritten note from
her announcing that she had bought me a three month
subscription to match dot com for a third a three
month subscription. I don't know if that's a subtle hint.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
Like in three months, three months for what till it's
time to wrap it up, find a new lover?
Speaker 1 (09:12):
No, No, I think I think of anything. She's like, hey,
you could wear this nice lingerie to you and you
and hubbies new new match. You know you're looking for
a you're looking for a little little little unicorn.
Speaker 3 (09:27):
You know, how many grand babies? Does she want?
Speaker 1 (09:29):
A lot? He wants a lot?
Speaker 2 (09:31):
You're right, because if there's more women than more grand babies,
you can you can have two women back at the
same time, and then you just keeps hair.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
And then imagine they do a party of three even
more times. How many grand babies can you get the in?
Speaker 1 (09:45):
Yeah, exactly, You just keep you just keep adding people in.
That's true.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
Did I mention that I'm married to her son? Dear
husband was reading over my shoulder, and he snatched the
note out of my hand to read it over again.
I was really proud of him because he actually had
some spine and asked her what in the world was this?
They don't cuss. Cussing is very wrong. People who cuss
have the devil controlling the tongue.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Wait, and they're okay with a lingerie and party of
three's party of three.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Is of course some monages. Don't you say, don't you
dare say the word that's doodoo. But hey, you can
go cheat on your wife.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Maybe it's ethical non monogamy. That's kind of what it
sounds like, real ethical.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Her smile fell, and she said that she thought I
could use it. Why you ask, because she's heard that
we've been arguing a lot more lately. She wanted me
to know that she supports me in singlehood and there's
plenty of fish in the sea. Don't worry. Ope, I'm
sure you'll find someone who's perfect for you.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Woo wait.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
So yes, she heard arguing. She said, Hey, here's some lingerie,
here's a subscription match dot com. Good luck finding someone else.
You know, I've been with your with your son for
ten years. We're married, but you've been arguing. Wow, here
you go.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Alie says she couldn't spring for a hinge.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
That hilarious.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Yeah, oh, yep, dude, wild wild.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
I was speechless.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
Yeah me too.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
I would be too opie and really regretting not saying
f you to their no alcohol rule and getting the
dang glass of mine. Wow, they can't even drink wine
at the dinner with the parents.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
This mom is giving a laingeray at the dinner table.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Yep, this is wild. So logical, soological. Dear husband got
his act together before I did. He was very calm,
too calm, if you know what I mean. He said,
very steadily. Mom, we're not getting a divorce. We're very
happily married. You were at our wedding, you were at
our anniversary cookout, you were here at Opie's birthday celebration,
(11:58):
and you've seen how much we love each other. Opie
already found her perfect match me. She doesn't need this.
You should try and get your money back.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
I love how you's still concerned about her getting a refund, Like, no,
that's not that we don't want to, just like, hey,
you should really try to get a refund. I don't
know if they have like a thirty day return bymby.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Maybe they got some credit, you know, around your You
know which one's worse.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
So which one's worse Your mom giving you a subscription
to match dot com because she wants y'all to divorce,
or your mom thinking that y'all are so in love
but just need a little thing to spice up the
spice up your life, and so she wants you to
get a third.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
Honestly, I will take the third because basically, what at least.
The third is like, I am so cool with you
that I'm down to do something that, like everyone thinks
is weird to like help you guys find happiness. This
way is like, oh, yeah, you shouldn't be married to
my son.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
I guess you gotta get I guess that's It's like,
you're so about that what is definitely weirder? Can we
do a poll? Riley, divorce or third? Which which one
would you rather? Your mom be pushing for?
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Let us know?
Speaker 3 (13:12):
And in this way too, she she's fighting for the relationship.
She's like, I want you guys still stay together.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
He hands her a note and stands up. Getting out
of the booth. He says that he's sorry, but it's
time for us to leave. Thank god we've already paid
the check. Mother in law is buttering the dear husband
has never really been this stir on her before, and
before she can really form a sentence to the no stay,
but why gibberish, dear husband says, come on, mom, you
(13:40):
have to know how inappropriate that was. He pats her shoulder,
hats father in alow in the back and says, love
you guys, We'll see you later, and we both walk out,
leaving mother in law with a gaping maw and the
cursed box behind. I thought I was gonna say mag yeah,
But now it's a few days and I'm pissed. I've
(14:01):
had the time to stew on it and witch to
friends about it, And while they were all appalled and
supportive of me, both of them won the dang mother
in law lottery, so they couldn't really relate or have
any advice. What the heck do I do? Do I
confront her? Do I bury it and move on while
silently steaming? Do I send her a lingerie's subscription in
(14:22):
not her size anonymously? I'm stuck. Dear husband wants to
bury it and move on, build the wall a little higher,
maybe not see them or interact with them for a
little bit, and let that be that. I'm usually a
little more bullheaded than he is, but even I don't
like standing up to his mom. She took like a
year of law school before dropping out because prego with
(14:43):
dear husband. She still blames dear husband for why she's
not a lawyer, but that's a whole difference.
Speaker 1 (14:49):
She's starting a piece of freaking work.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
What a peach, and she thinks that she's twenty times
better and smarter than everyone else. Because of that, she
likes to argue. She practically lives for it. I don't
I like clear, concise and logical arguments. She likes semantics
and red herrings and being a effing C word. I'm
so over this. What would you do if you were me?
(15:13):
And there is a I'll read a quick edit y'all
showed in cool. Thanks for taking the time to read
and help me. I'm sorry if I don't respond to comment,
but I'll promise I'll be reading every single one. And
then we have the big update. I mean, we have
a big task.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
In a I'm excited for the big update.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
So basically, what should OPI do to answer question? Give
it like one month?
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Mob needs a time out for sure?
Speaker 2 (15:37):
For time out, and like, hey, if you do this again,
you're just gonna get more and more time and time out. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
And I think it sounds like there hasn't been boundaries
set up previously, and so this would be the first
step towards boundaries. But I don't think it's at the
point where necessarily you would completely cut off. But I
think what this moves is moving towards is low contact
(16:02):
yes to eventual no contact or they don't get the
message they got.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
Listen, mother in law needs to needs to wisen up
if she wants to keep them. But we have the
answers of what happens in this update. Okay, she sent
us a letter or should I say she sent dear
husband a letter? Yes, like snail mail. I'm gonna transcribe
it word for word, including spelling mistakes, excluding real names. Okay,
(16:26):
here it is.
Speaker 4 (16:27):
My dearest firstborn. I am deeply disappointed in your behavior
at dinner. I expected that type of disrespect from her, but.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
Never from you. Have you been sleeping well?
Speaker 4 (16:39):
I am worried for you.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Perhaps she has been introducing you to the devil more
than we thought.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
I pray for you every night. As your mother, I
feel it is my responsibility to warn you about the
women you sleep with. She is dangerous, son.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
Oh my god, you have no idea what she has.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
Been telling people behind your back. She is sneaky.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
My friend old Biddy from the church works at the hospital.
Speaker 4 (17:04):
UH and has seen her coming and going a lot lately.
Is she on substances? I think that she is stealing
the substances from the doctor there look on the news.
It is a common scam, and she is sneaky enough
to pull it off. I know you have been fighting
more because you won't answer me when I call anymore.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Oh my god. She's literally planting the seeds of deceits
within their relationship and using her mom network to like
spin lies. Yes, wow, wow, you know what this is.
I think this is uh uh, this is you got
the past code wrong again. I think this is now
like up to like two to four months of low contact.
(17:46):
But yeah again with a with a talk before. It's
like a talk before saying hey, this is why we're
distancing yourself from you.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
If if this kind of uh interaction happens again, it's
going to be longer.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Yeah. The second, the second we hear see even the
slightest whiff of anything anything even remotely close to this again,
until you dig yourself into a hole of no contact
and you can't come out. That's that and the thing.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
The reason that we're trying to push for this like
stare step low contact rather than no contact is something
we've seen again and again in these stories and from
people that we've talked to. It's like it's really really
tough to cut off family, like just like emotionally, and
so you want to make sure they deserve it because
(18:36):
it's no easy task. And something that people have said,
even when their parents have been terrible is that on
the bed where they drift off into the next life,
there's always a little guilt for not trying to make
things right, even if the parents were the ones who
did all the wrong. So that's why we're trying to
(18:56):
like just push against the total no contact.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
And I also feel like it will one It gives
her like a chance to try and like redeem herself,
and it kind of like way more clearly sets because
it can be so easy for them to manipulate and
do all these things if you clearly say, hey, look,
I'm basically gonna take a break from you for two
to four months and then we're gonna come back and
if anything changes, I'm gonna go. Now, at least it's
(19:22):
been so clearly communicated that they're like, Okay, I can't
like waffle something. I'll be like, oh, they can't feign
ignorance or they can they can't do it as much
as they did in the past.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Like it's yeah exactly, I mean it's it's it's actually justified.
It's actually it's actually justified. I think that's the point
we need to get to.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Yes, agree back to Opie's muzzle laws letter, and you
wouldn't have.
Speaker 5 (19:46):
Given her that knockoff bracelet. If you are still happy,
good stand up for yourself. I raised you to speak
your mind, just like your mama put her in her
place on the curb.
Speaker 4 (19:57):
My God, now you know what else to confront two Salonians.
Speaker 1 (20:02):
Three three, Oh, my God, the Bible.
Speaker 4 (20:07):
But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
And protect you from the evil one.
Speaker 4 (20:13):
I only gave her that gift to let her know
that I am on her. Of course, I did not
actually get her a subscription to that sinful sight. But
now she knows I know I'm watching her. She will
hurt you, and I will not stand for it. When
you were born, I hurt you in my arms, kiss
you on your head, and promise you to always protect you.
So here I am listen.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
To your mummy and let her go.
Speaker 4 (20:34):
A divorce is less sinful than staying with the devil.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
God will forgive you, dude, cap nuts.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
She is a psycho, dude, and imagine like using the
Bible as a way to just like twist and manipulate someone. Ah, dude, worse.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Oh yeah, yeah, the verse before that, and pray we
may be delivered from wicked and evil people, for they
for not everyone has fail. Well, first off, she's evil
and wicked. You should read the first before that.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Maybe you should look in the mirror a little, mama.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Stop stop biting God's flow. Okay, at least be original.
At a bare minimum, you could go Daniel nine to nine.
We got another one. The Lord of God.
Speaker 4 (21:18):
Is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him.
I need you to come back home. Your father was
just diagnosed with deadly cancer and shingles. I need you
to come home and help her out.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
She's trying, dude, She's using every trick in the book. First,
he's using the book, ye, the og book. And then
she's being like, oh, also, we have someone immediately ill
and you got to go and come with us and
take care of him. So she's like using every little
little little lever in her mom arsenal to make op underthumb.
Speaker 4 (21:52):
They do not know how to help. Family is most important,
and if you will not help them, then brother on
LAWNTU will not go to college. He will stay at
home and do your duty for you. Galatians six to two.
Rather banger carry each other's burdens, and in this way
you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Christ commands you to help.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
Dude. I love how many Bible verses she dropping.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
She I feel like she's just googling like random stuff
and just slapping this.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
The thing is also like, I mean this. So when
I was working on the Amish farm, like and like
was planning stuff with the other Amish kids, they would
just drop like Bible verses and and they're like chat,
and I didn't know how to respond, so I just
started dropping Bible versus back. So I think maybe OP
just start fights fire with fire, drop some like mean
(22:43):
Bible not mean, but like drop some just fire Bible
versus portant case.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
I feel like OP would at least have the intellect
to understand understanding then use it. You know.
Speaker 3 (22:51):
Also you could say Galatians six to five the three
verses later for each one should carry their own load.
Speaker 1 (22:58):
Oh oh yeah, stop worrying about my load and how
much I'm loading up.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
That's right, I can carry this load.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Mom, Yeah, let me carry it. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
Also, have you prayed about it? Or we just were
signing Bible verses?
Speaker 1 (23:12):
Are we do that?
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Yeah? Surface spacious.
Speaker 4 (23:17):
I will come over on Sunday after church to talk
over this more with you. Love you and see you soon,
Mommy and Daddy.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
I I don't know where to begin. I'm sorry, but
cancer and shingles? Did that strike anyone else's weird? My
husband is all kinds of upset and wants to hear
her out and help. If it's true, I get it,
but especially since she has a history of copying others diagnoses,
I'm feeling extra sketch. F Ugh, I knew she would
(23:44):
pull some crap like this. A quick edit. I forgot
to address this in my last post and hear no
contact isn't currently an option for us because of the
brother in laws. The husband's brothers both brother in law
still live at home with her. Brother in law too
is going to college in the fall, graduating high school soon.
Brother in law one is a professional student and still
in college. To catching brother in law one catches shrapnel
(24:07):
over there. Neither of them realizes they can tell her
not yet. She checks their phones and emails.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Oh my god, emails dude, she is a helicopter in.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
I mean she she went, she upgraded from helicopter just
full NSA like she is just in every.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
I mean, she's like omnipotent at this point.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
Omnipotent.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Omnipotent. She knows when you're sleeping, Who knows when you're awake?
Who knows that that lingerie is making a Valentine's date.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Getting a bun in the oven to bank So they're
not even allowed to close their room doors. They have
to tell her where they're going before they leave the house.
And while I can't prove it, I think she's tracking
them because they refuse to go anywhere other than where
they've told her. Dude, low key, I'm like, can we
(24:57):
call like adult Protective Services or somebody? Because this is
this is getting crazy. Dear husband and I have been
their safe spot. We've taught them about the birds and
the bees because she refused. We taught brother in law
how to drink responsibly because he wanted to join a
fraternity and we didn't want him to get booze poisoning.
They feel comfortable asking us questions and telling us things
that they can't tell their parents. I'm not going to
(25:19):
take that away from them, especially not from brother in
law too, because he is the black sheep of the family.
He gets the brunt of mother in law even more
than everyone else, which is crazy.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
How much she's already doing like that is too much,
too much.
Speaker 2 (25:34):
All of this is where dear husband is coming from too.
And yes, it took him a long time to break
away from his mother, so he understands them more than
I do. Plus he really loves his dad and doesn't
want to abandon him either. It's sadly not as black
and white as everyone I know, including myself, as what
that would be. Like. One more thing, father in law
(25:55):
isn't allowed to have.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
A cell phone, even he falls under the jurisdiction.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
How does it keep getting worse?
Speaker 3 (26:01):
Okay, some of this stuff happened to me. My grandfather
does have a cell phone. He's not not not not
allowed to. But that doesn't sound too crazy.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Yeah, but yeah, he's he's that's different. That's okay.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Okay, this this means he's like whipped.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
I mean to the to the extent of like blink twice.
If you're if you're doing good, for the love of God,
we're injuring that no wonder. He looked down at the cake.
Speaker 1 (26:26):
He's just like like, yes, ma'am, yes, wife, whatever you say.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
What you say, wife, Maybe I can have one text.
If I'm a good boy tonight, I.
Speaker 1 (26:36):
Take my letter to the carry out pigeon. This is allowed, Mama.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
I'll use disappearing in to make it fun and make
it special. Our only hope is to catch him at
home alone while she is not out with while she's
out with her girlfriends. She's usually at a brunch or
lunch after church with the old biddies. But since she's
planning on coming here tomorrow, I don't know if that's
after lunch or if she's canceled it to come and
(27:01):
harass us. I'm sorry, guys, I'm not trying to be difficult,
a difficult which. It's just a hard situation, and unlike
anything I've ever been in before, I really do appreciate
at least the camaraderie, even if it feels like there's
no reasonable options to offer. Again, I'm really sorry. I
feel bad for frustrating people with my problems. I've got
personal messages calling me uncooperative, and I promise I'm not
(27:23):
trying to be It is just Cray Cray complicated. We
have some comments from the people, but really quick, I
think I understand the uh trickiness of helping out the
two brothers, which it seems like one's graduating high school,
one seems to be older.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
Like Opie doesn't want to cut off the brothers from support.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
She doesn't want to right. I think that, uh, this
isn't a perfect solution, but just one thing to do
is go to both of the brothers and just be like, hey, guys,
I know it's like expensive, but I would start planning
and saving now to move out, because my God, will
you have a different life being able to live on
(28:09):
Let let let husbands speak to it. It's like, hey, listen,
that's my mom too. I'm now living living with with
op with my wife. This is a ten thousand times
better scenario for yourself, and like start preparing for it now,
because it's probably hard to think while they're in the
mom vortex of like breaking away. I think I think
they got to be the ones like, hey, there is
a path, but start saving and getting ready now. Yeah.
(28:32):
I agree.
Speaker 3 (28:33):
I've seen similar people kind of go through, maybe not
to this magnitude, yeah, but things like that where.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
They're a lighter version, maybe a lot.
Speaker 3 (28:40):
Of version, and like you know, they're in a Christian household,
and usually like whenever they're not allowed to like talk
talk about certain things or everything, they kind of get
out of hand. Like I'm so glad they warn them about,
you know, boo poisoning, like beer poisoning, cause like you
probably would have been like, I'm a drink until I
can't stand anymore, and who knows what would have happened
(29:01):
exactly exactly, I.
Speaker 1 (29:03):
Mean you wake up the next day, yeah, acking and
then he eric, where was.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
I Yeah, talking from a it sounds like a for
sure from experience. Well, we got some relevant comments we're
gonna dive into. So commentar number one, old biddy is
breaking hip a laws, the medical laws if you're in
the States, and and they take that very seriously. Any
way to rescue the brother in laws from her abuse,
(29:27):
how much longer do they have to deal with their crap?
Father in law is an adult, so there's less you
can do about him if he's deciding to live under
mother in law's thumb. It seems like this is more
of a matter of counting down the clock than one
immediate note contact to give in the restraints you've outlined,
Opie response. It's definitely a counting down the clock type situation,
just because both of us obviously really care and want
(29:49):
to be there for his brothers when they finally realize
they can tell mommy, no. We just don't know when
that clock will end. Brother in law one is already
in adults. Brother in law two is great graduating high
school this month. Both our slash will be attending university
where both father in law and I work. While that
complicates it even more wow, uh, OPI and the father
(30:09):
in law work together and where mother in law used
to work, it's obviously mostly brother in law two that
we're most concerned about helping right now, Even though brother
in law one is an adult and should be able
to handle himself. How he was raised has seriously stunted
his mental and emotional age.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Hmmm, that makes sense.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
He still lives at home and won't go anywhere that
deviates from what mommy says is okay, it's really hard
for me to watch. Dear husband did the same thing
when we were first dating, like the first few years,
and he still often finds himself slipping into old habits
and he's the most rebellious of the three. Oh, he
married his wife and moved in with her.
Speaker 1 (30:47):
Crazy.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
You'll be happy to know I've reported her to the hospital.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Oh, for a violation of HIPPA.
Speaker 2 (30:56):
They said they were glad I told them and that
they would take care of it. I don't know what
their plane is exactly, but she wasn't there when I
went in for an appointment last week. And we have
another update.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Oh, another update.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Oh yeah, we have maybe even even more.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
Yeah. So it sounds like no contact is not an
option because you want to stay. But I still think
you can give the support that is needed for the
brothers while going low contact.
Speaker 2 (31:24):
I agree, And yeah, I think you got to like
just really really really hammer home the message to the
brothers is like leave.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
Nicole h says, Do they work at BUYU? Is that
the college?
Speaker 2 (31:37):
Possible?
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (31:37):
Because families, like literally the whole family work there. Yeah,
it could be, It really really could be. But let's
get into updates number two.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
Hey, it's Sam, your og host. Here. We're gonna get
back to the stories. But here's three minutes of ads
from our sponsors.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Okay, so this is gonna be relatively short because dear
husband and I have a lot to talk about, but
I needed some time to decomp us first, and my
way of decompressing is type. In all this crapout, Mother
in law came after church, just like she threatened in
her letter. Dear husband called the house to try to
talk to father in law around the time he knew
she should be headed this way, but brother in law
(32:15):
too informed us that father in law was coming as well. Awesome,
dear husband and I decided to throw keeping my health
a secret out the window. I donned a surgical mask
and we agreed to not let them in the house,
just in case. No one here should be surprised that
deadly cancer and shingles was a massive exaggeration. Father in
(32:36):
law has a rash on his flank and back. That's it.
He hasn't even gone to the doctor yet. He has
an appointment with his primary care physician on Monday. Mother
in law flipped her lid when we told her the
reason I was in a mask and we were on
the porch was because I gosp do have cancer. She
(32:57):
called me a copycat and drama queen. How effing rich
is that? Which sucks because she's always the one copying people.
But it just so happened that like Opie literally did
have cancer. They previously decided not to tell her, and
now she gets to be like, WHOA.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
This is infuriating.
Speaker 2 (33:18):
I asked her what her hospital friend told her, and
she continued to exist, insists that I was a pill thief.
So who knows either way? I'm still calling my on
colleges tomorrow and letting her know. Father in law didn't
know that. Mother in law had threatened to keep a
brother in law too, brother too away from college if
dear husband didn't return her home. Wow, this was the
(33:42):
first time I've seen him look mad in her presence.
He told her that would never happen and practically begged
us not to worry about it. Mother in law brushed
him off and said it was a joke. It was
a joke. Typical. Excuse me while I go find my eyes,
which just rolled right off. I roll to the maximum.
Speaker 1 (34:01):
I mean, dude, well, at least at the very least,
I feel like father in law is now pushing back.
I feel like he's had a little spaghetti noodle spine
for the first half of the story or up until
this point. Really and now finally like this. I feel
like his his spine is is slowly like the waters
(34:22):
leaving it, and it's turning into like the spaghetti spaghetti
right before you put it in the pot. You know,
it's like before the pot is like nice and firm,
and it's still breakable, like it's not like but he's
getting there. But it's getting there, you know. It's it's
increasing in uh uh in lack of just noodleliness.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
Where we might get to the point where we can't
break it in half.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
Yeah, I mean, I mean, uh hopefully, Well, one day,
one day, we can only dream, we can only dream,
we'll see this.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
Might this might be his never long bottom moment. Shout
out to Harry Potter. Mother in law also went on
this really dimented tirade about how rude I was for
not taking her birthday present home, just like we assumed.
She tried to say it was a joke. It was
a joke. Apparently the whole letter was also a joke.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
Yeah, dude, that was that was so funny.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Yeah, why don't she become a meet comedian?
Speaker 1 (35:14):
Mom drop all these jokes old Bible verses, Everyone will laugh.
Speaker 2 (35:19):
I did bring up that her pastor would probably not
how would not like how strongly she was advocated tell
her pastor, honor fire.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Let's go get it kicked out.
Speaker 2 (35:32):
Dude, you're giving her lingerie, you're signing her from match
dot com. She's married, and you're pushing for Oh, dude,
should kicked out of the church.
Speaker 3 (35:39):
Yeah, dude, you could be good because if you go
up to her say hey, this is wrong, and then
you bring a couple of friends, Hey this is wrong,
and she still doesn't listen, you can bring you to
the church. Get it kicked out.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
I will go straight to the church asap.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
Well. The Bible says you you have to do three steps.
It's like you talk to them one on one. If
they don't listen, you talk to them with a group
of friends.
Speaker 1 (35:57):
They already talked to them one on one group of friends.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
Were in a group right now. Yeah we're brothers.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
Yea, yeah, yeah, we're in a group. She's not listening. Okay, Okay,
I think I think we can go all the way
to the top.
Speaker 2 (36:09):
We've got the fast pass lace.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
Yeah, yeah, straight.
Speaker 2 (36:12):
To the big boss. She looked like she wanted to
snap my head off, but after glancing at dear husband
and seeing his strong face. She immediately switched from anger
to crying and grabbed dear husband's hands. She said that
she worried for his salvation and that she would stop
joking about me being the devil if I would prove
(36:32):
it to her and be baptized in her church. What
At this point I decide and said that I would
think about it. I just wanted her to stop. I
told her that all I wanted was for us to
all get along, and especially given my health, I would
(36:53):
really appreciate it if she would back off. Dear husband
backed me up and said that her Shanigan's we're only
adding to our stress. He also told her that we
haven't been fighting, We've just been spending more time together
since my diagnosis. Yeah, he's not answering your calls because
he's spending time with his wife who has cancer. A
(37:17):
mother in law. Looks like we did the old one? Dude,
did we do tour straight in the guts? She sniffled
and said that she guessed if I couldn't handle her
sense of humor.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
But he's not humor. You're gaslighting everyone.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Honestly, Honestly, I want to get a I want to
do the church thing right afterwards. I want to get
a comedic tour agent a comment to her agent to
pay him to say, hey, listen, listen, lady, you got talent.
I've been hearing all the jokes you've been telling. Yeah,
and we're about to put you in theaters one, two,
three thousand people, and we're gonna just let you go.
(37:54):
We're just gonna let you just do your thing.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
But ideally maybe in like a t where they stone
bad comedians.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
God, I was tomatoes.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
I don't know if anyone does tomatoes. I think it's
it's like the classic thing.
Speaker 2 (38:11):
Yeah, that was so.
Speaker 1 (38:13):
Yeah, it was like nineteen hundreds. I think ye.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
Now stones is more recent.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
Well, no, the people are still using stones. Stones are
the original people are still using stones. It's either there's
no way between. It's either booze or stones or booze.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
Let's let's let's do some some good old fashioned booze.
Don't destroy her, destroy her, you know, I want to
sense itself for pride. Listen, she's got a lot of pride.
That's that's a sin.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
I think we need to break it up her.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
All right. While Sam creates a new stolen golden rule
around new stone rule, she said, if I couldn't handle
her sense of humor, then maybe she just wouldn't joke
with me anymore. Thank you, I would love that perfect
Take your passive aggressive crap and stuff it. We click it.
We quickly discussed brother two's upcoming high school graduation party
(39:03):
with the whole family. She suggested that I not go
because of the cancer, and we're back. That took all
of point one seconds. Yeah, I told her, it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
Just one little like a ring around the rosie.
Speaker 2 (39:17):
Come on, infinite, I told her no way in heck
when I missed that. Brother in law two has already
told me how much it means to him that I
would be there. He sees me as a supportive big sister,
and I refuse to let her scare me out of
being there for him. Of course I didn't say that.
I just told her that my cancer isn't contagious, and
my doctor says that as long as I feel well,
(39:39):
I can continue living my life. How I like.
Speaker 1 (39:42):
Okay, CBF means certified bunk funk.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
Yeah, I like.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
Bunk funk.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
It sounds like a new genre I want to start.
Oh well, Opie says. Dear husband told her that we
have lunch plans and we have to go. He hugged
father in law and asked him to please let us
know Monday what the doctor says again about the rash
not cancer, and jingles. Mother in law hoffed on out
to her car and barked at father in law to
come along when he went to hug me. She's such
(40:14):
a witch man. People have asked for a backstory and
how we all got to this place, and I'll write
it out after dear husband and I get a chance
to talk about all of the current crap. Turns out
writing is very cathartic for me, and getting advice about
prior crap would not only benefit me, but others in
my situation that are reading. Everyone who's commented on my
(40:35):
post with uplifting advice and comments, Thank you, thank you,
thank you. You have no idea how helpful it is
for me. The whole thing with mother in law has
felt very lonely, and talking about it with people here
is such a relief. It means the world to me. Also,
anyone who thinks I'm faking it in the comments. As
you can see in my profile, I've been on Reddit
for over a year.
Speaker 1 (40:53):
Yeah, I got credit I got. I got karma.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
M mostly reading in this form for advice. Didn't post
here before my dinner incidents because I didn't feel like
she was bad enough for some of the mother in
laws out there. And I also didn't feel like I
was good enough as some of the daughter in laws
here with shiny spines and excellent comebacks. I'm not good
with confrontation, especially with her. I did read some of
the stories my life is being compared to, but I
(41:18):
guessed I missed the big fake reveal. Either way, the
fact that my husband is two brothers that we love
and want to help however we can does not mean
my life is a lie. My dad has two younger brothers.
Too many have two younger siblings.
Speaker 1 (41:31):
We got an update three, We.
Speaker 2 (41:32):
Got an update three coming up. We got an UPDA
three coming ab. So keep your seat belts buckled, keep buckle.
Speaker 3 (41:39):
I say, you know, play a little devil and spread
some rumors around the church and then step away.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Some church rumors. They wouldn't do that. They wouldn't spread gossip.
Speaker 3 (41:51):
Oh yeah, no, they definitely would not gossip.
Speaker 2 (41:54):
Where the gospel is I love the gospel.
Speaker 3 (41:57):
Gossip or you don't even have to go cherges, go
to herresser.
Speaker 1 (42:01):
It's true.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
Oh and also he says, we're not going to adopt them,
not gonna adopt the brothers. I can never imagine mother
in law randomly abandoning them. She's insanely possessive. Why would
she do that? And yes, kids that are treated the
way mother in law raised her boys are very hesitant
about making their parents angry and triggering a rampage from them,
even if those kids should have grown up already. Please,
(42:24):
I understand people being hesitant after finding out people relying
on here. That's sick and infuriating. Ask me any question
you want. I'll try to answer them all. But please
don't go to the other side and talk crap about me.
It reminds me too much of my gossipy mother in law.
And we have update number three. Do we have any
predictions any conspiracy theory? Icee us going into what I
(42:46):
believe is the final chapter.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
I mean, I think we can predict with some level
of certainty that the mother in law is not done
with her shenanigans. The shenanigans will continue until the day
that she is relieved from her duty of being a
mother in law. So I think we're in for a
little bit more of the same.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
Yeah, I think you know what long long long shot
I've been I've been going for the long shot conspiracy
theories lately. You know, when they start with something like
pretty awful and then they end up in jail hip
of violations. Okay, I I'm just gonna I'm just gonna
yeat a jail. I'm gonna yeat a jail.
Speaker 1 (43:30):
Conspiracy theory out there, damn all right, I'm ready. I'm
ready to see some jail, right, already, some some jail.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
Well, let's see it. An update number three. Hey guys,
I'm sorry. Hey, I'm sorry it's been so long for
this update. It's been a busy week. Also, I know
I understand the need for nicknames. I'm calling her the
lingerie and mother in law buying prank. Mother in law
doesn't exactly roll off the tongue. That didn't at all.
(43:57):
And I know a lot of people don't want to
read a backstory, but it would obviously be best if
everyone knew which crazy twatch they were reading about slash
advising about this time. I'm not too good at this,
but I'll try to think up one for you. Guys
to make it less worthy and straight to the point
next time. So first things first, head update, I did
report the nosy biddy who works at the hospital, her
(44:18):
mother in law's agent who was spilling the beans. Yep,
they were very apologetic and told me that they would
get taken care of.
Speaker 1 (44:26):
I'll theygive it. Put some of the mad shoes on
that mother in law. Oh God, make us sleep with
the fishes.
Speaker 2 (44:33):
Oh baby. I obviously have no idea what they're doing
exactly to take care of it, but I didn't see
her at the hospital when I went in last Friday
for my latest blood letting session. Hopefully she's learned her
lesson with whatever they did to her. As for lovely
mother in law, as I mentioned in my last post,
father in law just had a rash most likely definitely
(44:55):
not deadly cancer and shingles. Well maybe shingles, but no
way is this tiny rash whatever the heck deadly cancer
was supposed to mean. Everyone I roll with me at once.
I know he went to the doctor, but we surprisingly
haven't heard anything back yet. I'm guessing that means good
news that the whole thing was probably a ruse set
(45:16):
up by mother in law. To try and trick us
read deer husband into forgiving her since she found out
about my cancer. No, you see, the sad part is
that deer husband is already slipping and wants to just
act like everything's normal. So he's our spines are back
to water again from from the spaghetti and cook spaghetti.
Speaker 1 (45:38):
Dude, grow a freaking' spine? Yeah, this is why why
can't he? Honestly, this is this is getting what's wrong
with this guy?
Speaker 2 (45:45):
If this continues, this is getting into the territory of like, hey,
I don't know if I can be with you if
you're not going to stand up and you know, get
some space and distance. Come on, But I guess I'm
not allowed to talk about that here, am I Is
it okay if I post on just so single? I
(46:06):
don't know even if I'm posting, and I'm not sure
I make it just a complete just no. I think
I've seen people here do that before. But I can't remember.
My memory isn't what it used to be. I practically
have a photographic memory now. It's like if it wasn't
significant or don't write it down, it just poofs into
never never land. And I don't want to span the forms.
There's obviously many people with many other problems. This coming
(46:27):
weekend is the graduation party for brother in law too,
and I know dear husband wants to go. I want
to go too. I love the kid, and I don't
want to let him down. I also want don't want
to deal with the effing kraken in middle aged lady form.
So decisions decisions. Should we go to the party or
NA go to the party or nah. I don't think
(46:51):
it necessarily moves the needle on helping anything.
Speaker 1 (46:53):
No, but I just want to make sure that the
brothers feel supported.
Speaker 2 (46:59):
Yeah, because it is his I believe it's this graduation party.
Speaker 1 (47:01):
Yeah, And like I feel like, you know, if you
don't go, that's who's I think it's punishing the brother
more than it is the parents.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
I think you're right, you know, I think you're right
because if it was just a random like, oh we're
getting together, we're doing like a backyard barbecue, skip it,
don't deal with mother in law. But this is gonna
mean it's gonna mean the world to him. Yeah, seventy
five percent of chapter I.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
Would go to the party of the party. It's your
it's mostly for your brother.
Speaker 2 (47:29):
There we go, there we go. So that's where. That's
where we've landed. But let's see what you land After
all that being said, quite a few people asked how
it all started between me and my ballsy mother in
law my post. I have an effing decades worth of
stories at this point, but I will start with the beginning,
although it's a little bit nighn comparatively. Dear husband and
(47:51):
I met at work ten years back. We both had
summer jobs at the large theme park in our state's
big city. Dude, if it's b yu.
Speaker 3 (47:58):
Whoa whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa, were
you working at Dollywood? Because I mean, like this makes sense.
They work at Dollywood, they go to like a Baptist
church or like some not Pescatarian Presbyterian church, something like that,
and this happens, you got like a crazy you meet
a mad old lady.
Speaker 1 (48:15):
Dude, this could be your hometown.
Speaker 2 (48:17):
I could see it is I could see it. Here's
John here, og host here. We're gonna get back to
the stories, but here's a quick three minute break of
ass from our sponsors. It was his second year there,
it was my first so he wound up being my mentor.
We were dating within a month. Both of us were
in college, but I was his first girlfriend, and for
the life of me, I could not figure out why
(48:37):
until I read his parents, which ended up happening way
earlier than either of us expected. So we were both
living with our parents for the summer, well him full time,
but that's another story. And as fate would have it,
our parents lived only a neighborhood apart, literally one major
street separating us. So one night after work, at the
beginning of our official dating day, dear husband is making
(49:01):
fun of the way I drove home. Apparently his way
was better or something. He told me that he would
show me the right way to drive home from the
city and to follow him. Okay, so I'm behind him
the whole way back until we get to that major
street and then he turns right into his neighborhood. I
drive straight through and go left, and to mind, he
doesn't see me go left though, he just sees me
(49:21):
go straight. The next morning, we both show up for
our ship and he starts giving me crap about how
I didn't do it right. I didn't follow him all
the way home, you see, he thought I lived in
the neighborhood behind his now in front. He was expecting
me to use his neighborhood as a shortcut, basically, but
he never said that, so I didn't know, and that's
why that's what he thought. I was just thinking, Okay,
this kid wants me to come over to his house
(49:42):
a game on. Well that afternoon, we leave at the
same time once again, drive behind him. This time I
do as he says. I fall him all the way home,
literally to his driveway, and I'm laughing as I get
out of the car, picking on him for telling me
to do this, and how this look of horror was
on his face, and he just starts whispering for me
to leave. Now I don't.
Speaker 1 (50:03):
I don't know cute yet.
Speaker 2 (50:05):
The beast is home.
Speaker 1 (50:08):
She's slithering hope, he's saying, how they met?
Speaker 2 (50:12):
I So what we're happening right now is the fateful
day that this all began. Mother in law is slinking,
her claws dragging against the hard tile behind the door,
and and he's literally is like, run run because she's
at his house.
Speaker 1 (50:32):
Now.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
Booky, if mother in law comes out, it's gonna be
game over. I'm totally confused. But obviously I've done something wrong,
So I start apologizing, backing up to my car when
I hear this screech of come from the front door. Confirmed. Uh,
(50:54):
I'm gonna be right there, because only dogs could hear
that effing pitch.
Speaker 3 (50:59):
But sh I get it.
Speaker 2 (51:01):
His mom comes rushing around the corner, arms out ready
for a hug, and I swear stops passed away in
her tracks, and her face falls when she sees that
he's not alone, and worse, there's a girl with him.
Speaker 1 (51:14):
Oh no, I don't share my He's gonna be taken away.
Speaker 2 (51:19):
I can. I can never forget how big of a
tone change there was when she stopped and said, who
ah you to me? Dude? I totally I about crapped
my pants. She was scary as heck, but I tried
to play it off, and I said I was a
coworker of dear husbands and O wouldn't you know see
(51:39):
my parents live right across the street. And he told
me to follow him all the way home. See here
I am. Huh so I did? She cut me off
and turned to him to ask him why would he
invite a girl over without asking her permission first? Huh?
Isn't he on like two year two of college when
he said that he didn't invite me over, I swear
(52:00):
smoke started coming out of her ears because now I
was a liar and a stalker and I followed him
home for no reason. I will say, I'm now seeing
why she gave the gift of the laundry in match
dot com.
Speaker 1 (52:18):
Because she thought she was like stalking.
Speaker 2 (52:22):
From the first from the first second she met her,
she just decided that, like, I mean, it would have
been any woman, but like and then especially the way
she's like, oh, yeah, I followed him home. She's like, oh,
you're a stalker.
Speaker 1 (52:34):
Oh, and she's never let go of that.
Speaker 2 (52:36):
Never, Never, what happened?
Speaker 3 (52:39):
What happened to like opening people with loving arms?
Speaker 2 (52:42):
Nope, no, no, no, we have to turn them away.
You want bread, you get eat dirt. Dirt's delicious. It's
full of minerals. That's that's what mother in law said.
Mother in law was Jesus.
Speaker 1 (52:57):
Dirt my brothers and sisters.
Speaker 2 (52:59):
My brother and crassed pickupusses of hand of sand and
chomped down. So now I'm waving my arms while walking
closer and saying no, no, no, that's not how I
went at all. It's not what it looks like. I
just wanted to shake her hand and meet formally and
show her that I was a good girl. But I
didn't know one thing. His mother hates tattoos like hate,
(53:21):
hate hate tattoos. The photography team also worked the airbrush
tattoo booth, and that day had been my day, so
I had stamples of temporary tattoos all over my arms.
Speaker 1 (53:38):
Oh no, no, airbrush kitten, the mob's gonna be like.
Speaker 4 (53:43):
And she has tattoos?
Speaker 2 (53:45):
Who is this floozy? Turns out that even even temporary
spray paint tattoos are of the devil. And I had
wondered why dear husband never had airbrush tattoos on like
everyone else did when he worked at that booth, and
me waving my colorful arms around just made everything ten
(54:06):
times worse. She backed up quickly from me, recoiling like
I was a copperhead striking at her. Her face scrunched
and jumbled up so much it was practically unrecognizable. She
stopped me from trying to take her hand hand and
effing whispered, what ah, those guys devil on your arm?
(54:28):
The devil exists? And he is an ambrush kitten named Whiskers. Guys,
I really don't think I could have been more shocked.
I said, oh what, my arms like a dumb butt.
But you cannot be a dumb butt. You can be
the smartest parent cheeks this side of the Mississippi. And
(54:49):
how would they do that? Sam?
Speaker 1 (54:51):
Here go look up Okay, story time wherever they get
their podcast?
Speaker 2 (54:58):
Type it in, listen to full episodes of stories just
like this. But ladies and gentlemen, we are quickly approaching
the end of the story.
Speaker 1 (55:06):
Yeah, but.
Speaker 2 (55:08):
Let's say, what what should we do now? Knowing even
more back? Do we just assume from the beginning? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (55:15):
I mean, it seems like this has been a problem
for so long, from the inception of the relationship. And
I'm surprised they didn't put out boundaries earlier. That's what
I'm surprised.
Speaker 2 (55:26):
Yeah, it seems like reading in between the lines, husband
never really stood up very strongly before the incident with
the Landerie.
Speaker 1 (55:35):
Know how to he man is a floppy sandwich.
Speaker 2 (55:38):
It was it was a I mean, she legit raised
a cults of kids that would just not do what
they what they think is right. Just what mommy, Just
what mommy is?
Speaker 1 (55:49):
What mommy says, Mommy says, Simon says, what mommy says.
Speaker 2 (55:54):
Simon says, give me your location at all times.
Speaker 1 (55:57):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (55:58):
And even if you're with your wife, that's terrible, that
is full of sin. How dare you marry a woman
and stay faithful to her and have a beautiful, loving
relationship and live together? Gross unaccepted.
Speaker 1 (56:09):
Honestly, let's see.
Speaker 2 (56:10):
Let's see our our end faithale here, our faith faithale.
She starts backing up from me again, but she's talking
to dear husband now, only this time in a low,
growy whisper. She's telling him that he better make me
leave and get inside right now. I was obviously a
very bad girl who shouldn't be around him at all,
and if he wasn't inside within the next two minutes,
(56:32):
she was going to call the police on me for
trespassing on her property. What the actual f I rushed
back to my car and said, it's no problem. I'm
leaving right now, bye, dear husband, see you later, and
I sped away as she stared at me from the doorway.
When I got home, I told my mom what had happened,
and there was no way in heck, I was going
to continue dating that boy. His mom is crazy and
(56:54):
that's how I first met future mother in law a
full non contact I.
Speaker 1 (57:01):
Mean, with this backstory, I'm like, or do why would
you even want to know it? Not to divorce, but
with his backstory, I don't even know why you would
like want to have this mother in law anywhere near
your life like I would have. I feel like I
would have cut her off way earlier. Yeah, this is
this is Yike's territory, and I.
Speaker 2 (57:20):
Was thinking, like divorce if he because ten in ten years,
he hasn't grown the backbone like he kind of needs to.
Oh yeah, I schedule right now. Bye. But I mean
if he if he can, that's great, But like, I
don't know if Opie deserves another second after ten years
of this.
Speaker 1 (57:38):
Yeah, it's just so much. It's just so much. But
I would love to know what you guys would do.
Would you distance yourself from the mother in law even more?
Would you go no contact? Low contact? Would you report
this mother lot to the church? What would you do?
I would love to know what you.
Speaker 2 (57:54):
Think, But that is sadly the end of this episode.
Speaker 1 (57:57):
So if you love us, make sure to subscribe.
Speaker 2 (57:59):
We love you and see you tomorrow.
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