Paper Cuts
Have you SEEN the state of the papers today? PAPER CUTS has. In our thrice weekly podcast, some of Britain’s sharpest commentators and funniest comedians come together to look at the madness, the strangeness, the obsessions, and – occasionally – the brilliance of our national press. Host Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalists and comedians like Jonn Elledge, Grainne Maguire, Jacob Jarvis, Ava Santina, Jacob Hawley, Marcus Brigstocke, Coco Khan and many more. Illustrations by Modern Toss: https://moderntoss.com
Episodes
July 27, 2025 • 23 mins
We’ve got a big scoop for you today! Miranda Sawyer is back with a brand new podcast. Talk ’90s to me is out now and will be with you every Monday. The show dives deep into a wild decade of chaos, creativity and hedonism – from Oasis to ‘Friends’, from grunge to girl power, from Kate Moss to alcopops to ‘Trainspotting’ and beyond. Join Miranda as she meets the people who were really there for the decade of Cool Britannia, Cantona a...
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April 30, 2025 • 12 mins
Hello Paper Cuts listener! We all miss the good old show. Our brand new podcast CRIME SCENE is very different… but we thought you might like a taster.
Every week on CRIME SCENE, ex-Met Police Commissioner Bernard Hogan-Howe and former Mirror editor Alison Phillips lift the lid on how criminal investigations really work. In our debut episode: The shooting of an innocent nine-year-old girl in Dalston in 2024 laid bare bitter rivalr...
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March 28, 2025 • 70 mins
We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: We say goodbye to Paper Cuts as the Daily Star crowns Rachel Reeves the next “lettuce.” Kate Lister adopts a new philosophy over at The i, so Miranda and Gráinne are ready to embrace the “let them” theory. Finally – at The Mail, an anonymous reader is worried about his wife’s fascination with pegging – so we've brought in Jonn to offer his sage-like wisdom on the subject.
Miranda Saw...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The Metro lists some of the most shocking moments from kids’ TV staple Blue Peter. Meanwhile, Gail’s Bakery is taking over the bougie high streets of the UK, does yours qualify? Plus, The Daily Mail explains why kids are so badly behaved and yes, it involves their past lives, of course.
Her Royal Highness Miranda Sawyer is joined by some elite guests, including Baron Jacob Jarvis, La...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Miranda is giddy to discover one final nutty column from Liz Jones in the Daily Mail. Meanwhile, Alex is concerned about the state of middle-aged men, as Stig Abell and Bryan Johnson recount their mid-life crises in The Times. Plus – Gráinne is shocked to learn that the fashion world isn’t actually woke, as The Telegraph cheers on the return of fur at fashion week.
Miranda Sawyer is j...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Musk hogs the glory as the stranded NASA astronauts finally return home but Jan notices that The Mail is only focused on one thing: their looks! Meanwhile, a journo at The Guardian is having an identity crisis over her ‘problematic’ blonde hair, and Miranda contemplates her 40 years as a bleach blonde. Plus, Jarv takes notes as The Times shares life lessons from a well-adjusted, norma...
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March 19, 2025 • 38 mins
We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: We’ve got the Glasto lineup, and we are sick of the ‘next big thing’ and ready to embrace Rod Stewart. Meanwhile, The Times has a slightly patronising guide to St. Patrick’s Day, so Grainne Maguire has created her own Riverdance-inspired itinerary. Plus – Fashion Week may be over, but The Guardian has some cost-effective ways to look en vogue.
Miranda Sawyer is joined by an elite sele...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The Daily Mail has published a salacious account of an affair between Liz Truss and some Tory bloke. If you listen closely, you can hear the rage in Natasha’s voice. Meanwhile, The Guardian has gone White Lotus crazy and has published a wonderful column on the power of gossiping, which Grainne fully endorses. Plus – Miranda has found a brilliant piece in The Times that lifts the lid o...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The Times has Trump’s threats to Putin front and centre as the President pushes hard in peace negotiations – and Stuart feels conflicted for hoping Trump's bully boy tactics work. Meanwhile, The Guardian exposes Gen Z’s sneaky new office trick: 'taskmasking' but back in Miranda’s day, that was simply called 'bunking off.' Plus – The i’s resident sexpert Kate Lister tests out the viral...
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March 12, 2025 • 15 mins
We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The Daily Mail is profiling the rich and famous Americans moving to the UK to escape Trump... but Jason and Jonn think the story may have some holes. Meanwhile, Coco, Miranda, and Jacob reminisce about happier times on the football field, as The i profiles a dad conflicted by his new role as a U12 ref.
Miranda Sawyer is joined by Jonn Elledge, Jacob Hawley, Jason Hazeley, and the undi...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The Mirror is the only front page to mark the five year anniversary of Covid. Jason can’t quite get their head around the government's baffling response to the pandemic. Meanwhile, Sarah Vine at The Daily Mail has gone ‘fat jab’ mad, so Jonn takes a look at some of the most baffling columns around the weight loss drug. Plus – The Guardian looks at the romantasy revolution and Miranda ...
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March 6, 2025 • 30 mins
We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The i keeps us up to date with the latest from Trump Land, while Miranda questions whether Democrats wearing pink and holding up little signs is an effective protest. Meanwhile, The Telegraph is apoplectic over Meghan’s new Netflix show, but Coco wonders how much steam is left in the anti-Markle train. Plus – The Guardian dives into the weird and wonderful world of stage door autograp...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Did you enjoy your pancakes yesterday? The Daily Mail didn’t because in 2025, pancakes have gone ‘woke’. Meanwhile, The Guardian reveals that elder millennials are getting their tattoos lasered off, so we compare our ink. And The Telegraph takes its obsession with posh totty to new heights by ranking the hottest royal equerries.
Miranda Sawyer is joined by the who’s who of the Paper C...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Every single front page is singing Zelenskyy’s praises after his clash with Trump – but what does it really mean? Jonn breaks down the weekend that changed everything. Meanwhile, Miranda’s found a Telegraph column celebrating the return of middle-aged men – fitting, given today’s panel. Plus – The Guardian reckons city slickers should flee to the countryside to watch lambs being born ...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Did Keir Starmer really play a blinder when visiting Goblin King Donald Trump at the White House? Katy Perry’s all-female space trip on Jeff Bezos’s Blue Origin rocket: one small step for womankind or a “look! squirrel!” after Bezos’s troubles with the Washington Post? And between the spreadsheets: are Gen Z-ers really organising their dates on Microsoft Excel?
Miranda Sawyer is joi...
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February 25, 2025 • 35 mins
We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: We’re switching things up as Gráinne and Chantal take Miranda on a whirlwind tour of their favourite time of the year – awards season! Expect behind-the-scenes BAFTA gossip from Gráinne, Chantal’s ultimate dos and don’ts for the red carpet, and a look back at a year of high-profile heartbreaks as we hold our very own award show: The Breakies.
Miranda Sawyer is joined by the hosts of...
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February 24, 2025 • 38 mins
We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The Guardian is reeling from the results of the German election. Jonn walks us through the outcome and explains why the Nazis aren’t back—yet. We’ve brought in Gráinne to break down why the tabloids are obsessed with Blake Lively’s Hollywood legal clash with director Justin Baldoni. Plus, The Times has published excerpts from a former chief Tory whip, and Miranda loves the backbench g...
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February 21, 2025 • 43 mins
We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: None of the papers are backing Trump’s Ukraine plan and Marina explains why Europe should be worried about the President’s arrangement with Putin. Meanwhile, The Telegraph is calling on Gen Z to rise up and save EastEnders, as Jemma unpacks how the show has maintained its cult following for 40 years. Plus—Miranda has unearthed some top-tier middle-class dilemmas from The Daily Mail, a...
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Family fortunes! Poshos fight over big house – How's your handshake? – The fascinating world of fish
February 18, 2025 • 29 mins
We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The Telegraph is naturally obsessed with an aristocratic family feud over an £85m ancestral estate. The Times does an incredibly deep dive into the history of handshakes. Plus – There’s a story about fish in The Guardian so we’ve reeled in our resident aquatic guru Coco Khan to school us.
Miranda Sawyer is joined by A list Paper Cuts talent including Zing Tsjeng, Ava Santina, Jacob ...
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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Pics from the BAFTAs are all over the front pages, but Miranda only has eyes for Wallace and Gromit’s red carpet debut. The Times wonders what will happen when Boomers pass down their wealth and Zing breaks down why Millennials and Gen Z shouldn’t get too excited. Plus – Friend of the show Anniki Sommerville mourns the death of ‘kept women’ in the Daily Mail as Jacob reveals he wouldn...
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