Bewildered

When life as you know it crumbles—lost jobs, shaken identities, houses (literal or figurative) in rubble—what if you’re not meant to rebuild the old structure at all? In this episode of Bewildered, we're exploring our deep attachment to “putting it back how it was,” how culture teaches us to fear impermanence, and what becomes possible when we let Nature “take the wheel” to allow something ...

How do you continue doing ordinary human-life things while the world feels like it’s collapsing in real time?

That's what we're trying to figure out on this episode of Bewildered. We talk about ping‑ponging between school runs, summer camp registration, doctor's appointments, and breaking-news notifications that feel like the apocalypse is upon us. If you've been feeling caught in this same unnerving and exhausting back-and-f...

How are you weathering the season you’re in?

In this episode of Bewildered, we talk about what it really means to surrender to the season, whether it’s an upstate New York winter, perimenopause, a busy parenting era, or the “my foot hurts and I think my gums are receding” phase of life. We talk about how culture tries to flatten all seasons into one endless, brightly lit, 69-degrees-and-productive-all-the-ti...

Have you ever felt something was “off” about a situation or person...but then ignored that instinct to please others? In this episode, we explore how culture teaches us to override our body's internal signals in order to stay socially appropriate and “normal.” We talk about the difference between anxiety and intuitive warning, why our “social self” silences our “essential self,” and h...

What happens once you authorize your knowing?

On this Bewildered, we pick up where we left off about authorizing our essential, deep knowing and explore the question: What happens next? 

We talk about what it means to stop living by the culture's rules and start seeing life as a video game where we’re not just avatars bopping around—we’re learning to write the code of the game itself. To hear stories of synch...

Ever feel like the world is telling you what to think, do, or believe—until you’re not even sure what you know anymore? 

In this episode of Bewildered, we’re talking about “authorizing your own knowing”—a concept we picked up from the incredible Dr. Lisa Miller. We explore how to reclaim your own inner guidance, trust your instincts, and stop outsourcing your authority to others. 

If yo...

What if the person you say you want to be… isn’t really who you want to be at all?

In this episode of Bewildered, we talk about what it means to follow culture instead of joy, and how it all boils down to what Martha has learned (in person and on Instagram) about zebras and horses...  

Tune in to discover whether you really want to be the person you think you want to be, and find out the meaning of the unforg...

Do you suffer from “resting misery face”? Many of us do, and in this episode of Bewildered, we’re diving into exactly why that is. 

A few hints: It has to do with the brain’s “default mode network,” our hardwired negativity bias, the cultural pressures to stay miserable and afraid, and how our imagination tends to conspire against us.

The good news is that you can reclaim your “resting...

Have you ever been willing to “give up anything” for something you wanted? On this episode of Bewildered, we’re talking about the spiritual lesson that to be truly open to receiving something new, we first have to put something down. We share stories about letting go of things in our own lives and how that made space for wonder, awe, and our most precious experiences. It’s an episode full of laughter, insigh...

Does your life ever feel like a game of Tetris, where you get totally overwhelmed by all the pieces coming at you? 

In this episode of Bewildered, we’re talking about how to get through the chaos that is modern life: from role fragmentation, to relationship and caregiving pressures, to work responsibilities, to sleep deprivation. Join us for some world-class life coaching (and plenty of metaphors) as we explore how to fi...

Are you looking for ways to handle life when the culture’s rules no longer apply, and everything keeps changing at warp speed? In this episode of Bewildered, we’re talking about “flying blind” with confidence—trusting your body’s wisdom, adapting to new realities, and creating a path forward that’s right for you. We’re sharing personal stories, plenty of metaphors, and practical tips ...

We all need to take things in to keep us hydrated, not just physically, but also creatively. In this episode of Bewildered, we discuss what we call “filling the well”—receiving great art, stories, and creativity from others—and how it can replenish us and make us able to give and create ourselves. We share our rituals for getting inspired, explore why delight matters more than productivity, and offer a playf...

We’re in the middle of moving house (and Ro’s turning 45!) so our whole daily rhythm is being shaken up. But disruptions can be a great opportunity to consciously redesign your life. In this episode of Bewildered, we explore “day mapping,” staying responsive to nature’s cues, and letting your deepest yearnings guide you—instead of sticking to cultural rules or slipping into inertia. It’s ab...

What does a text about chickens have to do with the meaning of life? We're glad you asked! In this episode of Bewildered, we examine how our culture teaches us to avoid touch, fear time, and forego relationships for transactions. We dive deep into how we’ve been pushed away from nature and each other by systems that value money most, and we explore the things that really make life worth living: genuine connection, sensory exp...

Our culture believes that the only way to fix all the bad stuff in the world is to stare at it relentlessly, as if our sheer focus could solve things. (Or at least prove we’re not part of the problem.) 

However, there are more effective ways to be the change, ways that include beauty and joy.

On this episode of Bewildered, we’re talking about how we can actively change the world without being consumed by what&rsquo...

Do you find it difficult to share your unique offerings with the world? How about charging money for your work?

In this “Best of” episode of Bewildered, we dive into a question from listener Rebecca who’s trying to find the courage to shine her light in the world—and get paid well for it.

We share some of our own experiences with this issue too, and offer three magical little words that can banish shame and ...

“QUICK! DO THIS NOW! IT’S URGENT!”

Do those words spike your pulse? We're constantly pressured to do things that serve the system, and we’re trained to think of these things as urgent. But are they?

In this “Best of” episode of Bewildered, we dive into the topic of urgency: How there’s a type that will crush your soul and a type that will grow it—and how you can tell the difference.&n...

In our culture we’re socialized to believe that if we suffer enough, we’ll be rewarded later—and our reward will be happiness. In other words, happiness is something we have to earn through suffering.

On this “Best of” episode of Bewildered, we challenge this cultural belief, inspired by the words of 14th century mystic St. Catherine of Siena who said, “All the way to heaven is heaven.”

To ...

Ever suffer from burnout? We certainly have, and we’re talking all about it on this “Best of” episode of Bewildered!

Burnout is something our culture doesn’t allow because it expects us to be productive non-stop. However, our wild natures require “wintering” periods where we rest and reset.

If you need to recover from burnout (or you want to preempt it), tune in for the full episode to hear our s...