A Jaded Gay

Societal pressure on men to appear tough and self-reliant can lead to the avoidance of medical care since vulnerability is wrongly equated with weakness. For gay men, this is further complicated by the fear of discrimination or judgment in healthcare settings, creating additional barriers to accessing necessary treatment.

In this episode, Mickie Kennedy, author of Glandscapes, joins us to discuss how queer identity and mas...

Queer bookstores have long been more than just places to buy books, serving as cultural hubs, safe havens, and essential spaces for connection, representation, and affirmation within the LGBTQ+ community. As we navigate an increasingly hostile political landscape, building and sustaining these spaces is not only an act of resistance, but one of resilience and solidarity.

In this episode, Greg Newton and Donnie Jochum, co-f...

Many gay men grow up internalizing social norms that dictate how they should act, love, or present themselves—distorting their sense of self and making it harder to connect authentically with others. But we can begin to heal when we embrace radical acceptance, challenge outdated narratives, and learn to show up for ourselves with compassion.

In this episode, Sam Fogarty, a licensed therapist and clinical supervisor at myTh...

Previously, we explored the concept of love bombing, where one partner overwhelms the other with excessive affection and attention early in a relationship to mask manipulative intentions. This behavior often sets the stage for a narcissistic relationship, a toxic dynamic in which one partner uses charm, control, and emotional manipulation to maintain power.

In this episode, Mack Ciccone joins us to share his journey of lea...

Previously, we discussed our iconic pop queens and how their songs typically fit into distinct categories that hit an emotional button that appeals to gay men. These categories often include themes of empowerment, heartbreak, resilience, and self-expression, resonating deeply with the LGBTQ+ community, particularly gay men, who find solace and strength in these anthems.

In this episode, we continue our Gay Icons series wit...

For gay men, humor has long been a powerful tool for resilience, offering both a means of survival through marginalization and a way to reclaim joy and identity. As queer comedy evolves and gains mainstream visibility, it remains a radical act of authenticity, resistance, and connection—especially during Pride, when celebrating visibility and community is more important than ever.

In this episode, Michael John Ciszewski jo...

We've previously explored how LGBTQ+ history has often been overlooked, ignored, or deliberately erased, demonstrating the importance of remembering and honoring our past. Despite ongoing attacks from the current administration aimed at censoring or rewriting queer history, LGBTQ+ historians continue to preserve it, ensuring that our stories and the figures who shaped them are not forgotten.

In this episode, Keith Ste...

The current state of LGBTQ+ rights and politics reflects both significant progress and mounting challenges, with ongoing debates over transgender rights, workplace protections, and marriage equality. Activism, rooted in the community’s historic struggle for equality, continues to drive the Pride movement’s call for visibility, justice, and protection against rising anti-LGBTQ+ legislation and rhetoric.

In this episode, Mar...

While Pride is often seen as a time for parades and rainbow flags, it can also be a reminder of the trauma, shame, and disconnection that many LGBTQ+ people, especially gay men, carry within themselves. Yet Pride can also be a time of reclamation, offering an opportunity to honor queer joy and reconnect with our desires and authentic selves.

In this episode, Court Vox, a leading somatic sex educator, surrogate partner, and...

In previous episodes, we discussed how pop culture has long served as a powerful space for gay men to find representation, expression, and community, offering both a reflection of their struggles and a source of empowerment. Within this space, dolls and collectibles further provide a medium for gay men to explore themes of identity, often becoming symbols of empowerment and nostalgia within queer culture.

In this episode, ...

In recent years, "twink death"—the idea that a young, slim gay man loses social value as he ages out of the "twink" category—has gained traction as a viral online concept. Though often treated as a humorous social media trend, it highlights the deeper issues around ageism, body image, and the pressure to conform to narrow beauty standards within the gay community.

In this episode, we unpack the cultural...

In previous episodes, we explored how LGBTQ+ media representation has evolved significantly since the early days of cinema, shifting from largely negative stereotypes and hidden identities to more nuanced and diverse portrayals of queer experiences. Despite this progress, there still seems to be a lack of LGBTQ+ voices and perspectives behind the cameras, ensuring that characters are authentically represented.

In this epis...

LGBTQ+ individuals often navigate the diverse landscape of the queer community to forge connections that resonate with their identities, seeking spaces where they feel seen, understood, and supported. The bear community, with its celebration of body positivity and inclusivity, provides a unique subculture within the larger LGBTQ+ spectrum, fostering a strong sense of belonging and community engagement.

In this episode, Mar...

In a time when relationships are no longer confined to traditional labels, ethical non-monogamy allows gay individuals to build connections that align with their unique desires and values. By fostering open communication, trust, and mutual consent, non-monogamous relationships can provide fulfilling connections that honor the evolving dynamics of love and partnership.

In this episode, Jeff Hudson joins us to share his pers...

In previous episodes, we've explored the key themes of gay villages and how destinations like Fire Island and Provincetown serve as sanctuaries for the queer community. Gay men, in particular, are often passionate about travel because it provides a sense of freedom, adventure, and the chance to engage with diverse cultures, communities, and experiences that affirm their identities.

In this episode, Jason Heidemann, a ...

Throughout many episodes, we’ve discussed how gay men continue to grapple with the shame they internalized as children growing up in a predominantly straight society that often invalidated or condemned their identities. This lingering shame can evolve into deep-rooted trauma, affecting their self-worth, relationships, and overall mental well-being.

In this episode, we're exploring the theme of gay identity development...

In past episodes, we've explored pivotal moments in LGBTQ+ history that have often been overlooked or erased, highlighting why remembering our past is so vital. With the current administration actively trying to erase our history, preserving and sharing these stories—from hidden queer figures to the fight for educational accessibility—is more urgent than ever.

In this episode, Michael Venturiello, an LGBTQ+ historian ...

The current landscape of LGBTQ+ bullying remains pervasive, especially in schools and online, where discrimination and harassment can have devastating impacts on mental health and well-being. Not only does this isolate individuals, but it also perpetuates a culture of fear and exclusion, making it harder for the community to achieve acceptance and equality.

In this episode, Mike Keller, an author and speaker focused on rai...

For gay men raised in religious environments, they often internalize harmful messages that condemn their sexual orientation, fostering a deep sense of unworthiness or fear. This religious trauma can manifest in lasting struggles with shame and self-acceptance, but through self-compassion, supportive communities, and healing practices, they can reclaim their sense of authenticity and pride in their identity.

In this episode...