Be A Better You
The Be a Better You Podcast (formerly The Emotional Abuse Recovery Podcast) is hosted by Best Selling Author and Certified Rapid Reprogramming™ Coach, Allison K. Dagney. As a young adult, I met a man who I believed was the love of my life. We got married quickly and brought three kids into the world. But something was wrong. I was miserable. And I blamed myself for all the problems in our marriage. What I didn't know, was that I was being emotional abused by who I believe is a narcissist. I decided it was time to break free and step into the person I was always meant to be — confident and free to live the life I’ve always imagined. I escaped, and I turned my personal story of transformation into a memoir. And now I coach women all over the world to help them transform their pain into empowerment, experience peace and joy, and start living life like never before.
Episodes
“Why didn’t you just leave?”
It’s the question survivors of abuse hear the most—and the one that causes the deepest shame. The truth is, leaving an abusive relationship isn’t simple. The reason is something called the cycle of abuse and trauma bonding.
In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Allison K. Dagney—survivor, author, and subconscious reprogramming expert—explains why survivors feel trapped even wh...
Most people think abuse has to be physical or obvious to “count.” The truth? Some of the most damaging forms of emotional abuse are subtle, confusing, and hard to explain—yet they leave deep scars.
In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Allison K. Dagney—survivor, author, and subconscious reprogramming expert—exposes the lesser-known tactics of abuse that rarely get talked about:
- The intrusive stare that sil...
When you’ve lived through emotional abuse, the very idea of a healthy, loving relationship can feel like a fantasy. Maybe you’ve never experienced respect, true friendship, or kindness in a partner. Maybe you’ve been told—through words or through wounds—that love is supposed to be hard, painful, or disappointing. And maybe you secretly believe that happy marriages are reserved for other people, not for you.
That’s exac...
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and in this episode of Be A Better You Podcast, Allison K. Dagney—survivor, author, and subconscious reprogramming expert—pulls back the curtain on 3 key ways emotional abuse presents itself.
Emotional abuse isn’t always screaming, yelling, or physical violence. More often, it shows up as gaslighting, coercive control, minimization, and subtle psychological manipulation tha...
Going through a high-conflict divorce can feel overwhelming, isolating, and downright scary. In this rapid-fire episode of Be A Better You Podcast, host Allison K. Dagney sits down with Certified Divorce Coach Chantal Contorines to answer the toughest questions women face when divorcing a high-conflict personality.
You’ll learn:
- How to recognize high-conflict behaviors and protect yourself
- The biggest mistakes to avo...
Do you feel guilty for being angry about what happened to you? Survivors of emotional abuse are often told to “forgive and forget,” or they fear that expressing anger will make them just like their abuser. But here’s the truth: your anger is not only valid—it’s necessary for healing.
In this episode of Be A Better You Podcast, host and subconscious reprogramming expert Allison K. Dagney explains why anger is a healthy,...
Do you beat yourself up with the thought, “I should’ve left sooner”? Survivors of emotional abuse often live with deep regret, believing they wasted years or failed themselves and their children by staying too long. But here’s the truth: you couldn’t have left any earlier—because your brain and nervous system were working to keep you alive.
In this episode of Be A Better You Podcast, host and subconscious reprogramming...
Do you replay your past and think, “I should’ve known better”? Survivors of emotional abuse often torture themselves with regret, believing they failed by not recognizing the truth sooner. But here’s the reality: you couldn’t have known better at the time—because abuse clouds judgment, rewires the brain, and makes survival feel safer than clarity.
In this episode of Be A Better You Podcast, host and subconscious reprog...
Do you ever catch yourself thinking, “I should’ve seen the signs of abuse”? If you’ve been replaying your past and blaming yourself for not noticing the red flags, this episode will bring you relief and clarity. The truth is, you couldn’t have known—because abusers hide the warning signs on purpose.
In this episode of Be A Better You Podcast, host and subconscious reprogramming expert Allison K. Dagney explains why sur...
Struggling to make decisions after emotional abuse? You’re not alone. Survivors often face crippling self-doubt, fear of making the “wrong” choice, and the exhausting cycle of second-guessing themselves. In this episode of Be A Better You Podcast, host and subconscious reprogramming expert Allison K. Dagney explains why survivors get stuck in indecision, how abuse wires the brain to fear choice, and the exact steps yo...
Today's episode gives you a quick hack towards Self Love! If you've struggled with showing or feeling love for yourself, this trick can help you. It uses a fun visualization exercise you can do anywhere anytime to help strengthen your brain towards feeling love toward yourself. Let me know what you think after you try it out!
To learn more about how to put self-love into practice, check out the I'm Worth...
Are you working so hard to heal but still feel stuck in the same painful cycles? In this episode of Be A Better You Podcast, Allison breaks down why nothing changes when you’re “trying so hard.” You’ll learn why affirmations, journaling, and willpower don’t fix the root cause, and how your subconscious mind is wired to repeat old patterns — making you feel defeated, broken, or like you’ll never move forward.
Allison s...
In this episode, I sit down with Maria Natapov, step-parenting and co-parenting coach, and facilitator of the BeH2O® framework, to explore how parents can work together — even after separation — to give their children the best chance to thrive.
Maria shares practical, foundational communication strategies to help you collaborate with your child’s other parent, reduce conflict, and create an environment where your kids ...
Are you struggling with the hidden effects of emotional abuse — like chronic fatigue, anxiety, brain fog, or constant overthinking? In this episode, Allison shares how emotional abuse impacts the body, memory, and relationships long after the abuse ends, and why it’s not your fault. You’ll learn how trauma gets stored in the nervous system, why symptoms like insomnia, headaches, and poor focus are so common for surviv...
In this powerful and deeply personal conversation, Allison and Laura open up about their journeys through — and out of — narcissistic and emotional abuse.
Laura Richards is an international podcaster, #1 bestselling author, and speaker dedicated to empowering women worldwide. Through her acclaimed podcast That’s Where I’m At and bestselling book Married To A “Nice” Guy: Getting Over Narcissistic Abuse, Laura shares her...
If you constantly feel anxious, overthink every outcome, or worry about the people you love as a way to “keep them safe,” this episode is for you.
In today’s episode, we’re unpacking the truth about chronic worry—how it shows up in your nervous system, how it forms as a subconscious coping mechanism after emotional abuse, and why it becomes a deeply ingrained habit that’s hard to break. I’ll also explain how worry ofte...
In this powerful episode, I’m breaking down 10 signs that you weren’t actually seen or loved in your past relationship—you were used as a mirror for someone else’s wounds. If you’ve experienced narcissistic abuse, especially at the hands of a covert or malignant narcissist, this will give you language for the confusion and emotional exhaustion you felt.
We’ll explore how narcissists project their deepest insecurities o...
In this episode, we’re diving into something that’s not talked about enough: the dark side of using AI as your go-to for emotional advice, relationship reflection, and healing support. While artificial intelligence can be a powerful tool for self-awareness and growth, it can also quietly reinforce unhealthy patterns, especially if you’ve experienced narcissistic abuse, emotional manipulation, or are healing after divo...
In this powerful episode of The Be A Better You Podcast, emotional healing coach Allison K. Dagney explores a question that haunts many survivors of narcissistic abuse, emotional abuse, trauma, betrayal, and divorce: Who am I without my pain?
After living in survival mode for so long, it’s easy for your identity to become wrapped up in your wounds. Allison gently unpacks why we hold onto pain as part of who we are and ...
In this insightful episode of The Be A Better You Podcast, emotional healing coach Allison K. Dagney dives deep into the hidden ways that self-defense mechanisms, developed after emotional abuse and trauma, can keep you stuck.
Discover how common patterns like over-explaining, rigid control, hyper-vigilance, and seeing criticism everywhere might be sabotaging your personal growth, relationships, and your journey to emo...
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