Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Wake that ass up in the morning.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
The Breakfast Club. Yep, it's the world's mos dangerous morning
to show to Breakfast Club CHARLAMAGNEA God, just hilarious. Dj Envy
is off today. But you know, May fifth is not
just single to mile, it is National Silence to Shame Day.
So we could not have National Silence to Shame Day
be happening without talking to the founder of Silence to Shame,
Miss Shanty Dos. Good morning, Shanty.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Good morning. It's so good to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
How you feeling have you?
Speaker 3 (00:27):
I'm feeling good. It's a little cool in New York,
but feeling good. God woke me up this morning.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
And it's so bipolar Hea. And in New York, like
two days ago, girl was like ninety threes and then
now it will be forty nine today.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
It's like that in the A two a little bit.
But congratulations to you. Is honor to be on the
show with you.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Thank you so much. Now May fifth is National Silence
to Shame Day for the people who are new here.
What is National Silence to Shame Day? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
So you know my nonprofit Silence to Shame we exist
to empower and educate communities around mental health and wellness,
and so I made up my own day seventeen and
we got like ninety million impressions that year, and so
I thought, okay, let me apply to the National Day register.
So it's a day of awareness. It's actually an official day,
and so we utilize that day to really continue to
(01:13):
normalize the conversation, encourage people to post, encourage people to
donate to our organization because we are still a small
nonprofit doing mighty work, and we also have an app
coming out on mak lived. So yeah, so I'm really
excited about it. Two years ago we partnered with Dereil
Booker at Microsoft and they included us in their global hackathon,
(01:34):
and so here we are two years later. It's a
free mental health app call Silence the Shame. If you
have an iPhone or an Android, you know, you can
download it and it's going to have like, you know,
daily content, updated mindfulness moments, daily dosage. So we might
be able to you know, repurpose content from a lot
of our old community conversations, new conversations. As you know,
(01:58):
we've had a lot of artists to supports and athletes,
and so we want to be able to put that
content back out there. In addition to new content, of course,
educate the community around different mental health challenges and be
able to push resources. And again, the goal is to
provide accessibility because so many people in our community still
don't have access to the basics like Wi Fi.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Yeah, you know, I like that idea because so many
people are also addicted to their phones, and we know
that social media is causing so many mental health issues.
So if you're already addicted, why not give them something
good to make a habit every day?
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Absolutely, and as you said, you know this smartphone right here,
you know is challenging for some, but it can save
lives as well. So we want to meet people where
they're at. That's why we're so excited about the app.
And then also we're going to be doing Instagram lives
all day again continuing to normalize the conversations. So we're
going to be talking to Christa Renee, the actress from
Sisters who is our official ambassador. Also doctor Raquel Martin
(02:54):
who is a phenomenal Sister out of Tennessee and she
is a psychologist. My brother Ronnie, who is also a
board member of Silence and Shame Your Girl, My Girl,
Angela R's gonna come on and talk. We're gonna just
do like ten minute segments Lamar Rutger, ESPN host L Duncan,
Our Boy King, J Barnett, and so many others. So
(03:14):
we're just gonna open up, you know, the ig lives
and hopefully get people to either share or just learn
a little bit about why these people focus on mental health.
The one thing I am excited about is, you know,
this generation is openly talking about it. Right. One of
my friends said his son is ten years old and
was like, Dad, you know, I think I need to
talk to somebody. No, wow years old.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
My daughter does that at eight.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Yeah, and so and then it's a testament to you too, right,
You're you're you're normalizing the conversation right in your own household,
and we have to continue to do that. But I think,
you know, even just from still talking to some of
my colleagues and the music business and other places, the
resources are there, but not everybody are using them true health.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Like my oldest is fifteen, and she started she was
talking people that talk to a dervis at thirteen, and
not because anything is necessarily wrong, it's just like why
not like I treat it like I treat it like
going to the gym.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
And to that point, our theme this year for National
Silence to Shame Day and Mental Health Awareness MNUTH is
redefining mental wellness, simply put, making sure everyone knows that
it affects your overall well being, your mental, your physical,
and your spiritual life. It's nothing that like people say, oh, yeah,
I know about that thing mental health. No, we all
have mental health. It's how you think, how you act,
(04:27):
and how you feel. So we just want to kind
of redefine it and celebrate, like taking that journey of
your emotional well being and making it a part of
your everyday regimen.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
What have you learned new about yourself over the past
year in regards to mindfulness and mental health.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Wow, I learned that one I am a little bit
more of an introvert than I thought I was, like
kind of being out there and having to promote. I
feel like I from doing like my prayer and meditation
in the morning, that I really like kind of being
by myself. I like to travel by myself of those
introspective moments, and it's important for me to start my
(05:03):
mornings like that, in the quiet, in the still, without
the noise, and I used to be the girl like
I'm on every let me see what's going on Instagram,
Like I would start my day like this, almost sleeping
like this, And I realized, like I need that peace
and quiet and I need to embrace those, you know,
moments where I feel like an introvert or where I
feel like I need to just find that balance within
(05:24):
myself before I even start calling people or texting or
sending emails or taking meetings, like I need that quiet time.
And I really realized, like I.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Love myself, that I feel like.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Absolutely, and I think we, you know, for the first
times we had to sit still. Some of us were
with family members, some of us were by ourselves, and
you had to really figure out, like I really like myself.
Am I proud of the person that I am? How
am I handling things? And so I just had to
take some hard looks at myself and really work on
getting to be the person that I wanted to because
(05:58):
you know, I've been in and out of there, you know,
over the years. I'm still grieving the loss of my
mom and sister the last five years, but just being
able to celebrate and know that I'm enough, and it
took a while for me to sit there and feel
like I was enough, Because you're walking away from the
music business. Who does that, you know, at the height
of their career, And there were times where I felt
like I was less than seeing my peers still in
(06:20):
it and you know, not necessarily having the same amount
of you know, commas behind those you know, dollar signs
and doing something different. But I'm out here doing God's work.
I feel like I'm doing my purpose driven work, and
I'm just really excited to be working alongside such great
team members. We have six staff members of Silenced. A shame,
but like that's such a blessing. Like I walked away
(06:41):
from it all, I left.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
It all, but just work is more fulfilling.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
Though it is, And I have my own staff, I'm
my own boss, and we're saving lives now.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Shanty just recently, sadly, you had another passing, you know,
hip hop had another passing, the great Reco Wade and
you you worked.
Speaker 3 (06:58):
For Ego while worked with rig Because I got hired
at La Face Records in nineteen ninety three and met
at La Reid introduced me to organized noise in a
little group called Outcasts, and he was like, these are
your guys, this is what you're gonna be responsible for,
you know, promotions and then and then eventually doing marketing,
and so meeting Rico for the first time, I was like,
(07:19):
he is so Atlanta, but he was so passionate and
he was really like the spokesperson for Organized Noise. Ray
and Pat shout out as a Ray and Pat, but
they were mostly you know, in the studio, but Rico
was the one coming up to the label taking the meetings.
And I, Lily literally used to go to the dungeon.
And we've all seen pictures of the original It's red
(07:41):
clay on the floor, right, plaques and speakers all around.
But those were like incredible moments and who knew the
impact that they would have on Southern hip hop. You know,
Rico always said, you know, we always had Southern rap
in Atlanta, but the trajectory of Southern hip hop really
changed after Outcasts and Goodie Matt were born, and you know,
all because of Organized Noise.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
And it was really red clay on the Florida studio.
Speaker 3 (08:03):
It was really red clay.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
So y'all took your shoes off, of course, no, y'all
kett my.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
Shoes on and it was funny because I was always
myself and Diddy Hibler, who is Peaches on the first
Outcast album. We were kind of like the only chicks
that was around, the only girls a lot. But all
the guys treated me with respect, and you know, it
was just such a creative, you know, feeling when you
were down, and just the magic that came out of
the dungeon was really dope. They even like at one
(08:29):
time named their label Red Clay Record, so like there
was a whole thing.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Yeah, how did the passing a regal wave impact you personally?
Speaker 3 (08:36):
It was really difficult. I remember getting that call excuse
me a couple of weeks ago on a Saturday morning,
and I just it was like time stood still, and
I had just talked to Rico, like a few weeks
before that. Excuse me. I had just talked to Rico
a few weeks before that, and we were gonna do
some things together, and he was just so energetic because
he was a little sick as well. In February he
(08:57):
had had surgery and he felt like, you know, that guy,
I had given him another chance, and I guess, you know,
now God was preparing him to welcome him into the Kingdom.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
Little did we know.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
But I cried a lot. You know, I went over
to the Dungeon I mean, to the studio that day
to see Big Boy and Killer Mike and some of
the family members in the Dungeon family. It really is
like a family. We may not always talk every day,
but we came up together. We were kids in this industry,
and I feel like we changed the world. You know,
like look at Atlanta now, it is still you know.
(09:30):
I know New York is the birthplace, and I give
New York all the props and the mecca of hip hop,
but I feel like this generation, you know, Atlanta is
still setting the tone and the trends of hip hop.
You know, it's undeniable, and we have Rico Aid and
Organized Noise to thank for that.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
When it comes to grief, you know, could you give
some give people tips on dealing with grief because you
dealt with a lot of it.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Yeah, absolutely, so I tell people, you know, first of all,
grief is an individual journey. We all go through it,
whether it's a loss of loved ones, family members, etc.
And you got to like really process it in your
own way. It can hit you in so many different instances.
And also the thing about grief, I tell people, you
never get over it. You just find pathways forward. So
(10:13):
being able to talk to a grief counselor but in
your own time. It took me about four months or
five months after my sister passed before I was ready
to see a grief counselor. The other thing, too, is
you have to set boundaries for yourself because people mean well,
but oftentimes when people pass away and I've fallen victim
to this, you just don't know what to say. But
sometimes those things that you say can come off hurtful
(10:34):
and insensitive. So you just have to set your personal
and professional boundaries. And also, you know a lot of times,
you know, companies will give you only three days and
you have to come back to work. You might need
some mental health days, you know, to continue. I don't
know if you'll be ready to go back to work
after losing a child, or a husband, or a spouse
or a sibling. I mean, losing my sister and my
(10:55):
mom was one of the worst things that ever happened
to me, and so it took me time. And so
I tell people grief on your own timetable. Just this
past December and I'm gonna relaunch it. Literally a week
before Christmas, got placed on my spirit to write a
book because I feel like the holidays are really tough,
and so I wrote a book just giving people tips.
It was called have Yourself a Merry Little Grief Miss,
(11:16):
and it was tips on navigating grief through the holidays.
So I'm going to re release that and just again
it's about grieving in your own time and your own space,
but also letting people in. Sometimes just having a friend
come in to sit. They ain't gonna say nothing, they
can just be sitting there, and just knowing that their
presence is there can help you not to feel so
isolated and alone.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
What tips would you give women who are coming to
work and they're pregnant and you know, like say after
nine am they don't feel like being bothered anymore, would
like the job, and you know, you get quiet and
like don't want to talk.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
I'm just.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
I'm just saying, what would what tips would you give
to women?
Speaker 3 (11:55):
First of all, you got to give yourself grace, because
every day is different. We have to give ourselves grace,
and our colleagues have to give you know, their employees
or whoever's experiencing that grace because every day is different,
and for women that are pregnant, you know, your hormones
are all over the place. And for somebody like me,
the auntie in the room, I'm fifty three, but I'm
dealing menopause and there are some mornings where like my
(12:18):
mental health and my thoughts are racing and all over
the place, and so I just tell people, like I
think it's okay to say, hey, you know what, it's
one of those days, like y'all know that, Like I
love y'all, but I'm not feeling my best self today,
so please give me that grace that I need. It's
not personal. I'm not trying to be a bee or anything.
I'm just having a moment, and that's what I think
(12:39):
I do.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
I don't really vocalize it, you know, just because you know,
this is my job and I love the people I
work with, you know what I'm saying, And so even me,
it's just something yeah, even yeah. So like I I
do feels and I'm six months pregnant now in my
third trimester, and I'm like, it gets thank you, It
gets harder getting up every morning gets harder and harder,
(13:01):
you know, because baby's growing. I can't sleep on my
stomach of course, and sometimes not most of the time,
not even my side. So don't get properized.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
But girl, just be a lot. You gotta be kind
to yourself. Yeah. We just had a for so May Firsus,
a Black Children's Mental Health Day in the state of
Georgia on path of Sileunch of Shame, and we had
an art contest with kids and the thing was a
kind mind. And so you got to be kind to
yourself when you have to realize, like every day our
emotions are going to be different. You don't know what's
going to be triggering you. You don't know how you're
(13:31):
going to be feeling. And so if we just at
least have that open dialogue and tell each other what
we're experiencing, we don't have to share it all and say, hey,
you know what, I need a little grace today, give
me some space, and I'll be back to myself tomorrow.
It's just about being open and communicating. Communication is key.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
I agree with that because I don't feel like when
it comes to women being pregnant, we always look at
it as a physical thing, but we don't focus on
the mental and emotional toll it takes, especially women that
are getting up every day going to work.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Yeah, and women in general, especially Black women, we have
so much to deal with, even from a medical perspective,
like showing up and making sure that we're getting in
the proper care. We talk about maternal health and that
sort of thing. And so again, let's support our Black
women and even just black women in the workplace in general.
We have to We always show up and people think
we're the super women, right, And so my message this
(14:19):
morning to all my sisters out there, especially sisters of color,
give yourself permission to take that cape off right and
to be who you.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Need to be.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
I think it's a really dangerous narrative when they're always
talking about the strong black woman. Yes, we are strong.
We've been resilient since the days of slavery. But if
we don't allow ourselves to pour back in to have
those moments where we have to navigate through our tough
feelings and to give ourselves permission to see a therapist
or to give ourself permission to see I mean, to
set those boundaries in place, it could be really dangerous
(14:51):
for us in the workplace. Within our families with you know,
with spouses and loved ones and couples. You gotta take
time to just stop and quiet the noise and be
okay with just being who we are. We don't always
have to be up and show up and be strong
every single day because life be lifing.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Yes, that's right. How can we support Silence to Shame
on this Sunday May fifth?
Speaker 3 (15:14):
Yes, So a couple things. So, first of all, visit
our website silencedoshame dot com or follow us at Silence
to Shame on Instagram. We're having these virtual banners again
so you can upload your own photo or video so
you can become a mental health champion. You can text
the words silence s I L E n CE To donate,
you text the word silence to seven O seven O
(15:36):
seven o. And then also check out our Instagram lives.
Like I mentioned, so many great people from Crystal Renee
to angela Rie to King j Burnett, El Duncan and
so many others. And let's continue this conversation. You know,
May fifth is really the launch and kickoff, but you
know we're in this to win at twenty four to
seven and we're trying to do this work and the
last thing is download our app. It's free. Don't judge us, y'all.
(15:57):
It's the first iteration, so you know how technology is.
But let's celebrate the fact that there is another resource,
particularly for communities of color, that provides, you know, free
content and wellness strategies. And I also just want to
shout out a lot of our hip hop friends, like
a Little John or one undred three thousand that are
doing these albums right to me that are from a
(16:18):
place of wellness and meditation. And shout out to Frank
Ski who just released an album called Climate Change. I
tell y'all, it's like different sounds from around the world,
the Great Barrier, reef and different things. But it's so
dope and I've started my morning for the last week
with it and it just puts me in such a
great place of comm It's like nine tracks. So I
just love that, like our black men are really leaning
(16:39):
into mindfulness and meditation. And again we have people like
you Charlemagne to think because you post about it, you
talk about it, and you really live, you know, in
a place of wellness and peace. And I love you
for that.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Thank you, Shanty. You love the work that you're doing too.
Make sure you support Shanty Does Silence and Shame Day.
Is this Sunday and also important, don't it?
Speaker 3 (17:00):
Yes, please donate And I also just want to mention
I have my own podcast called The Mebo Show am
I for My and Bo for Body and the new
episode launches on May eighth with d Nice and we're
talking about black men and mental wellness.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Make sure you subscribing download that Shanty thank you for coming.
Always it's Shanty Dodge National Silence to Shame Days. This Sunday,
it's the Breakfast Club.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Wake that ass up her in the morning.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
The Breakfast Club
Wake that ass up in the morning.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
The Breakfast Club. Yep, it's the world's mos dangerous morning
to show to Breakfast Club CHARLAMAGNEA God, just hilarious. Dj Envy
is off today. But you know, May fifth is not
just single to mile, it is National Silence to Shame Day.
So we could not have National Silence to Shame Day
be happening without talking to the founder of Silence to Shame,
Miss Shanty Dos. Good morning, Shanty.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Good morning. It's so good to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
How you feeling have you?
Speaker 3 (00:27):
I'm feeling good. It's a little cool in New York,
but feeling good. God woke me up this morning.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
And it's so bipolar Hea. And in New York, like
two days ago, girl was like ninety threes and then
now it will be forty nine today.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
It's like that in the A two a little bit.
But congratulations to you. Is honor to be on the
show with you.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Thank you so much. Now May fifth is National Silence
to Shame Day for the people who are new here.
What is National Silence to Shame Day? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
So you know my nonprofit Silence to Shame we exist
to empower and educate communities around mental health and wellness,
and so I made up my own day seventeen and
we got like ninety million impressions that year, and so
I thought, okay, let me apply to the National Day register.
So it's a day of awareness. It's actually an official day,
and so we utilize that day to really continue to
(01:13):
normalize the conversation, encourage people to post, encourage people to
donate to our organization because we are still a small
nonprofit doing mighty work, and we also have an app
coming out on mak lived. So yeah, so I'm really
excited about it. Two years ago we partnered with Dereil
Booker at Microsoft and they included us in their global hackathon,
(01:34):
and so here we are two years later. It's a
free mental health app call Silence the Shame. If you
have an iPhone or an Android, you know, you can
download it and it's going to have like, you know,
daily content, updated mindfulness moments, daily dosage. So we might
be able to you know, repurpose content from a lot
of our old community conversations, new conversations. As you know,
(01:58):
we've had a lot of artists to supports and athletes,
and so we want to be able to put that
content back out there. In addition to new content, of course,
educate the community around different mental health challenges and be
able to push resources. And again, the goal is to
provide accessibility because so many people in our community still
don't have access to the basics like Wi Fi.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Yeah, you know, I like that idea because so many
people are also addicted to their phones, and we know
that social media is causing so many mental health issues.
So if you're already addicted, why not give them something
good to make a habit every day?
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Absolutely, and as you said, you know this smartphone right here,
you know is challenging for some, but it can save
lives as well. So we want to meet people where
they're at. That's why we're so excited about the app.
And then also we're going to be doing Instagram lives
all day again continuing to normalize the conversations. So we're
going to be talking to Christa Renee, the actress from
Sisters who is our official ambassador. Also doctor Raquel Martin
(02:54):
who is a phenomenal Sister out of Tennessee and she
is a psychologist. My brother Ronnie, who is also a
board member of Silence and Shame Your Girl, My Girl,
Angela R's gonna come on and talk. We're gonna just
do like ten minute segments Lamar Rutger, ESPN host L Duncan,
Our Boy King, J Barnett, and so many others. So
(03:14):
we're just gonna open up, you know, the ig lives
and hopefully get people to either share or just learn
a little bit about why these people focus on mental health.
The one thing I am excited about is, you know,
this generation is openly talking about it. Right. One of
my friends said his son is ten years old and
was like, Dad, you know, I think I need to
talk to somebody. No, wow years old.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
My daughter does that at eight.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Yeah, and so and then it's a testament to you too, right,
You're you're you're normalizing the conversation right in your own household,
and we have to continue to do that. But I think,
you know, even just from still talking to some of
my colleagues and the music business and other places, the
resources are there, but not everybody are using them true health.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Like my oldest is fifteen, and she started she was
talking people that talk to a dervis at thirteen, and
not because anything is necessarily wrong, it's just like why
not like I treat it like I treat it like
going to the gym.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
And to that point, our theme this year for National
Silence to Shame Day and Mental Health Awareness MNUTH is
redefining mental wellness, simply put, making sure everyone knows that
it affects your overall well being, your mental, your physical,
and your spiritual life. It's nothing that like people say, oh, yeah,
I know about that thing mental health. No, we all
have mental health. It's how you think, how you act,
(04:27):
and how you feel. So we just want to kind
of redefine it and celebrate, like taking that journey of
your emotional well being and making it a part of
your everyday regimen.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
What have you learned new about yourself over the past
year in regards to mindfulness and mental health.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Wow, I learned that one I am a little bit
more of an introvert than I thought I was, like
kind of being out there and having to promote. I
feel like I from doing like my prayer and meditation
in the morning, that I really like kind of being
by myself. I like to travel by myself of those
introspective moments, and it's important for me to start my
(05:03):
mornings like that, in the quiet, in the still, without
the noise, and I used to be the girl like
I'm on every let me see what's going on Instagram,
Like I would start my day like this, almost sleeping
like this, And I realized, like I need that peace
and quiet and I need to embrace those, you know,
moments where I feel like an introvert or where I
feel like I need to just find that balance within
(05:24):
myself before I even start calling people or texting or
sending emails or taking meetings, like I need that quiet time.
And I really realized, like I.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Love myself, that I feel like.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Absolutely, and I think we, you know, for the first
times we had to sit still. Some of us were
with family members, some of us were by ourselves, and
you had to really figure out, like I really like myself.
Am I proud of the person that I am? How
am I handling things? And so I just had to
take some hard looks at myself and really work on
getting to be the person that I wanted to because
(05:58):
you know, I've been in and out of there, you know,
over the years. I'm still grieving the loss of my
mom and sister the last five years, but just being
able to celebrate and know that I'm enough, and it
took a while for me to sit there and feel
like I was enough, Because you're walking away from the
music business. Who does that, you know, at the height
of their career, And there were times where I felt
like I was less than seeing my peers still in
(06:20):
it and you know, not necessarily having the same amount
of you know, commas behind those you know, dollar signs
and doing something different. But I'm out here doing God's work.
I feel like I'm doing my purpose driven work, and
I'm just really excited to be working alongside such great
team members. We have six staff members of Silenced. A shame,
but like that's such a blessing. Like I walked away
(06:41):
from it all, I left.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
It all, but just work is more fulfilling.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
Though it is, And I have my own staff, I'm
my own boss, and we're saving lives now.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Shanty just recently, sadly, you had another passing, you know,
hip hop had another passing, the great Reco Wade and
you you worked.
Speaker 3 (06:58):
For Ego while worked with rig Because I got hired
at La Face Records in nineteen ninety three and met
at La Reid introduced me to organized noise in a
little group called Outcasts, and he was like, these are
your guys, this is what you're gonna be responsible for,
you know, promotions and then and then eventually doing marketing,
and so meeting Rico for the first time, I was like,
(07:19):
he is so Atlanta, but he was so passionate and
he was really like the spokesperson for Organized Noise. Ray
and Pat shout out as a Ray and Pat, but
they were mostly you know, in the studio, but Rico
was the one coming up to the label taking the meetings.
And I, Lily literally used to go to the dungeon.
And we've all seen pictures of the original It's red
(07:41):
clay on the floor, right, plaques and speakers all around.
But those were like incredible moments and who knew the
impact that they would have on Southern hip hop. You know,
Rico always said, you know, we always had Southern rap
in Atlanta, but the trajectory of Southern hip hop really
changed after Outcasts and Goodie Matt were born, and you know,
all because of Organized Noise.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
And it was really red clay on the Florida studio.
Speaker 3 (08:03):
It was really red clay.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
So y'all took your shoes off, of course, no, y'all
kett my.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
Shoes on and it was funny because I was always
myself and Diddy Hibler, who is Peaches on the first
Outcast album. We were kind of like the only chicks
that was around, the only girls a lot. But all
the guys treated me with respect, and you know, it
was just such a creative, you know, feeling when you
were down, and just the magic that came out of
the dungeon was really dope. They even like at one
(08:29):
time named their label Red Clay Record, so like there
was a whole thing.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Yeah, how did the passing a regal wave impact you personally?
Speaker 3 (08:36):
It was really difficult. I remember getting that call excuse
me a couple of weeks ago on a Saturday morning,
and I just it was like time stood still, and
I had just talked to Rico, like a few weeks
before that. Excuse me. I had just talked to Rico
a few weeks before that, and we were gonna do
some things together, and he was just so energetic because
he was a little sick as well. In February he
(08:57):
had had surgery and he felt like, you know, that guy,
I had given him another chance, and I guess, you know,
now God was preparing him to welcome him into the Kingdom.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
Little did we know.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
But I cried a lot. You know, I went over
to the Dungeon I mean, to the studio that day
to see Big Boy and Killer Mike and some of
the family members in the Dungeon family. It really is
like a family. We may not always talk every day,
but we came up together. We were kids in this industry,
and I feel like we changed the world. You know,
like look at Atlanta now, it is still you know.
(09:30):
I know New York is the birthplace, and I give
New York all the props and the mecca of hip hop,
but I feel like this generation, you know, Atlanta is
still setting the tone and the trends of hip hop.
You know, it's undeniable, and we have Rico Aid and
Organized Noise to thank for that.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
When it comes to grief, you know, could you give
some give people tips on dealing with grief because you
dealt with a lot of it.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Yeah, absolutely, so I tell people, you know, first of all,
grief is an individual journey. We all go through it,
whether it's a loss of loved ones, family members, etc.
And you got to like really process it in your
own way. It can hit you in so many different instances.
And also the thing about grief, I tell people, you
never get over it. You just find pathways forward. So
(10:13):
being able to talk to a grief counselor but in
your own time. It took me about four months or
five months after my sister passed before I was ready
to see a grief counselor. The other thing, too, is
you have to set boundaries for yourself because people mean well,
but oftentimes when people pass away and I've fallen victim
to this, you just don't know what to say. But
sometimes those things that you say can come off hurtful
(10:34):
and insensitive. So you just have to set your personal
and professional boundaries. And also, you know a lot of times,
you know, companies will give you only three days and
you have to come back to work. You might need
some mental health days, you know, to continue. I don't
know if you'll be ready to go back to work
after losing a child, or a husband, or a spouse
or a sibling. I mean, losing my sister and my
(10:55):
mom was one of the worst things that ever happened
to me, and so it took me time. And so
I tell people grief on your own timetable. Just this
past December and I'm gonna relaunch it. Literally a week
before Christmas, got placed on my spirit to write a
book because I feel like the holidays are really tough,
and so I wrote a book just giving people tips.
It was called have Yourself a Merry Little Grief Miss,
(11:16):
and it was tips on navigating grief through the holidays.
So I'm going to re release that and just again
it's about grieving in your own time and your own space,
but also letting people in. Sometimes just having a friend
come in to sit. They ain't gonna say nothing, they
can just be sitting there, and just knowing that their
presence is there can help you not to feel so
isolated and alone.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
What tips would you give women who are coming to
work and they're pregnant and you know, like say after
nine am they don't feel like being bothered anymore, would
like the job, and you know, you get quiet and
like don't want to talk.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
I'm just.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
I'm just saying, what would what tips would you give
to women?
Speaker 3 (11:55):
First of all, you got to give yourself grace, because
every day is different. We have to give ourselves grace,
and our colleagues have to give you know, their employees
or whoever's experiencing that grace because every day is different,
and for women that are pregnant, you know, your hormones
are all over the place. And for somebody like me,
the auntie in the room, I'm fifty three, but I'm
dealing menopause and there are some mornings where like my
(12:18):
mental health and my thoughts are racing and all over
the place, and so I just tell people, like I
think it's okay to say, hey, you know what, it's
one of those days, like y'all know that, Like I
love y'all, but I'm not feeling my best self today,
so please give me that grace that I need. It's
not personal. I'm not trying to be a bee or anything.
I'm just having a moment, and that's what I think
(12:39):
I do.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
I don't really vocalize it, you know, just because you know,
this is my job and I love the people I
work with, you know what I'm saying, And so even me,
it's just something yeah, even yeah. So like I I
do feels and I'm six months pregnant now in my
third trimester, and I'm like, it gets thank you, It
gets harder getting up every morning gets harder and harder,
(13:01):
you know, because baby's growing. I can't sleep on my
stomach of course, and sometimes not most of the time,
not even my side. So don't get properized.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
But girl, just be a lot. You gotta be kind
to yourself. Yeah. We just had a for so May Firsus,
a Black Children's Mental Health Day in the state of
Georgia on path of Sileunch of Shame, and we had
an art contest with kids and the thing was a
kind mind. And so you got to be kind to
yourself when you have to realize, like every day our
emotions are going to be different. You don't know what's
going to be triggering you. You don't know how you're
(13:31):
going to be feeling. And so if we just at
least have that open dialogue and tell each other what
we're experiencing, we don't have to share it all and say, hey,
you know what, I need a little grace today, give
me some space, and I'll be back to myself tomorrow.
It's just about being open and communicating. Communication is key.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
I agree with that because I don't feel like when
it comes to women being pregnant, we always look at
it as a physical thing, but we don't focus on
the mental and emotional toll it takes, especially women that
are getting up every day going to work.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Yeah, and women in general, especially Black women, we have
so much to deal with, even from a medical perspective,
like showing up and making sure that we're getting in
the proper care. We talk about maternal health and that
sort of thing. And so again, let's support our Black
women and even just black women in the workplace in general.
We have to We always show up and people think
we're the super women, right, And so my message this
(14:19):
morning to all my sisters out there, especially sisters of color,
give yourself permission to take that cape off right and
to be who you.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Need to be.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
I think it's a really dangerous narrative when they're always
talking about the strong black woman. Yes, we are strong.
We've been resilient since the days of slavery. But if
we don't allow ourselves to pour back in to have
those moments where we have to navigate through our tough
feelings and to give ourselves permission to see a therapist
or to give ourself permission to see I mean, to
set those boundaries in place, it could be really dangerous
(14:51):
for us in the workplace. Within our families with you know,
with spouses and loved ones and couples. You gotta take
time to just stop and quiet the noise and be
okay with just being who we are. We don't always
have to be up and show up and be strong
every single day because life be lifing.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Yes, that's right. How can we support Silence to Shame
on this Sunday May fifth?
Speaker 3 (15:14):
Yes, So a couple things. So, first of all, visit
our website silencedoshame dot com or follow us at Silence
to Shame on Instagram. We're having these virtual banners again
so you can upload your own photo or video so
you can become a mental health champion. You can text
the words silence s I L E n CE To donate,
you text the word silence to seven O seven O
(15:36):
seven o. And then also check out our Instagram lives.
Like I mentioned, so many great people from Crystal Renee
to angela Rie to King j Burnett, El Duncan and
so many others. And let's continue this conversation. You know,
May fifth is really the launch and kickoff, but you
know we're in this to win at twenty four to
seven and we're trying to do this work and the
last thing is download our app. It's free. Don't judge us, y'all.
(15:57):
It's the first iteration, so you know how technology is.
But let's celebrate the fact that there is another resource,
particularly for communities of color, that provides, you know, free
content and wellness strategies. And I also just want to
shout out a lot of our hip hop friends, like
a Little John or one undred three thousand that are
doing these albums right to me that are from a
(16:18):
place of wellness and meditation. And shout out to Frank
Ski who just released an album called Climate Change. I
tell y'all, it's like different sounds from around the world,
the Great Barrier, reef and different things. But it's so
dope and I've started my morning for the last week
with it and it just puts me in such a
great place of comm It's like nine tracks. So I
just love that, like our black men are really leaning
(16:39):
into mindfulness and meditation. And again we have people like
you Charlemagne to think because you post about it, you
talk about it, and you really live, you know, in
a place of wellness and peace. And I love you
for that.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Thank you, Shanty. You love the work that you're doing too.
Make sure you support Shanty Does Silence and Shame Day.
Is this Sunday and also important, don't it?
Speaker 3 (17:00):
Yes, please donate And I also just want to mention
I have my own podcast called The Mebo Show am
I for My and Bo for Body and the new
episode launches on May eighth with d Nice and we're
talking about black men and mental wellness.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Make sure you subscribing download that Shanty thank you for coming.
Always it's Shanty Dodge National Silence to Shame Days. This Sunday,
it's the Breakfast Club.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Wake that ass up her in the morning.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
The Breakfast Club
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