August 13, 2022 • 21 mins
Comedian Sam Jay, Author & Activist Marianne Williamson and former NFL Wide Receiver Brandon Marshal debate the week's top stories with Charlamagne Tha God.
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
You're listening to Comedy Central. This week, Joe Biden signed
the bill to make sure that folks were fraudulent p
P P loans end up in p P prison. Conspiracy
theorists me believe this was all is set up to
ruin black progress. See, if you couldn't get p P
per releaf for your legitimate business, then you probably lost
your business. And if you've got p P per releaf
(00:22):
for your fraudulent business, then you're probably going to jail.
Some would say the government killed two birds with one stone,
but I say they killed two blacks with one loan.
I go by the name of Charlemagne and God. And
it's been a hell of a week. Queen il let's
get it. Before we get started, I got to introduce
(00:56):
the best panel in late Night. He's a former NFL
wide receiver and the host of the I Am Athlete podcast,
Makes Noise For Brandon Marshall, y'all, that averrest is very fresh,
very fresh. She's a New York Times bestselling author and activist,
Mary Anne Williamson, Maryann makes and she's a comedian and
(01:19):
host of Paul's with Sam J. It's Sam J. Y'all
all right and later in the show, I'll be talking
to ship with my guy Michael Rappaport. Now a lot
happened this week. Uh. Serena william says she's retiring from
tennis after the US Open. But I know, I know,
I know. But she says she doesn't like the word retirement.
She prefers the word transition. I think someone should reminds
(01:43):
Serena in two transition doesn't meantime. It means learned. My
motherfucking pronounced okay right. Retirement sounds way more efficient than
a transition. Though, when I come out as trans I'm
gonna say I'm retiring. Put my dick in the raptors. Uh.
Doctors in China detected a new virus that they think
(02:04):
could be another pandemic. I know, man, you're thinking what
I'm thinking. Yeah, the little kids working at the Chinese
virus factory must be working over time. And Frank Oscean
is selling a thou dollar but dazzled Cockrane, that's right,
from Green Babies, the chokers on the Glyzzie. This guy's
(02:24):
doing everything. He's doing everything but making music, all right.
But I will say diamonds on the dick are a
great discraction from monkey pop craction. What it's a great discraction.
You know, let me mind my babies. That's what I
really want to talk about. Topic one. That's right on Monday,
(02:46):
the FEDS pulled up the magalago to grab Trump by
the pussy, all right, And now members of the GOP
are screaming to the fund and destroy the FBI. Marjorie
Taylor Green, Paul Gosa, I am with you. Round of applause. Okay,
these are the kinds of issues that would bring us
together because I've been screaming we should destroy the FBI
(03:06):
ever since the days of the head Nica killing and
chall the Jagahoga. All Right, I gotta say allegedly, but
as far as I know, the FBI was complicit in
the assassinations of Malcolm X, Fred Hampton, Mark Clark, and
they told Dr Martin Luther King Jr. To kill himself
just for being a faithful black man. So when you
tell me you want to destroy the FBI, I say
(03:28):
you're crazy because they might have my phone tap. But
believe me, I'm with you. Let's get rid of the
rest of the alphabet while we're at it, right, Sam
j I don't know, Bro. I was kind of even
first with the FBI this week, Oh, I was, I was, yeah,
because they was. I felt like they were just coming
around and handling all unfinished business. You know what I'm saying.
They did the Brianna Taylor thing, those cops got killed
(03:50):
on the FBI, the truck raid. I mean, it feels
like they're at least swinging in the right direction. You
mean they're doing their job, yes, okay, so I guess
when they're efficient, I'm prombi. I think we should always
have some level of healthy skepticism. But the burden of
proof right here is not on the FBI. The burden
(04:11):
of proof is on Donald Trump. He took twenty five
boxes he wasn't supposed to take. They asked for them back,
he didn't give them, and then they subpoena at him.
A subpoena doesn't mean would you please consider now? He says, Oh,
my lawyers have been have been cooperating. But if you
get a subpoena in the spring and it's August, if
(04:32):
it was any of us here, we're coming in. That's
what the government's gonna do. What do you think right now?
I mean, look, you know, we can we can debate
all we want about the FBI. You know, they're supposed
to be nonpartis. I'm so great that you so glad
that you highlighted all of that. But the end of
the day, their job is to make sure that all
(04:53):
of us are adhering to what the justice system, which
means if Donald Trump is under investigation, then Donald Trump's
house and mar Logo lar Ago is being raided, then
Donald Trump's asked, is probably going to be in jail? Okay,
do you think he's going to generally, well, I think that.
And if we're going to talk about actually being ruled
(05:13):
by law rather than people and narratives that are political,
then you're innocent until proven guilty in this country. But
so far, the way the FBI has acted, from all
appearances is according to the law. Now they will decide,
there will be there will be indictments. If there are indictments,
there will be prosecution. If there is a prosecution, and
if there is a trial, a jury will decide. And
that's how it should happen in America. Were we from
(05:36):
in the hood, right, that don't happen. We don't got
to prove ourselves. I got a couple of homeboys, a
couple of friends. You know what I'm saying. I got
a brother right now doing six years, seven years. And
it's one of those things when you know you're walking
down the street like damn, such and such guy picked
up no problem going to county jail. But when they
say FBI, people like, goddamn, what you're thing is the truth.
(06:00):
It's like when the FBI comes, we know people, but
now we're speculating he might go to jail with the FBI.
And I think it's because we've never seen him do
it to a president. That's it. We've never seen this
happen to a president because we've never had a president
so egregious, you know what I mean, Like, you know,
Trump's the first president, so don't blame that we had
(06:22):
a black president. So the adjudgments of being made, you
know what I mean? Like, so I don't know, I
don't know what's gonna happen because we've never even seen
us happen. Marianne, do you agree with that? Don't answer,
I think to Pete. Davidson and Kim Kardashian broke up
(06:42):
and Kanye West rejoiced with this lame ass Instagram post. Look, yeah,
I don't think people should play with death unless they're
ready to die. All right. You would think the same
man who wrote the album Graduation will come up with
something better. But then again, he's also the man that
said poop school scoop? Did he woop whoop the scoop depoot.
I'm gonna start with you, Brandon, Well, Kim go back
(07:04):
to black men, don't we say? Well? First, I think
it's a great question for you, is it? Is it
true once you go black you never go back? No,
but you go back and forth. Listen, listen. You know
(07:38):
it was bugged out about this. If Kanye was wasn't famous,
wouldn't he just be a stalker? Yes, but his psychological
issues are pretty well established at this point. I mean,
the country sees it and understands that no, no, no
no no no no no no no no, like this
is real, like right, because that's what we can't do, right.
We can't do that. We like Kanye phenomenal. One thing
(07:59):
is that one of the things that doing is tearing
down another brother or sister that's doing something phenomenal. Because
there's not too many of us get the opportunity, and
a lot of times what we do is we try
to get people passes because like, damn, you're doing such
a great job on this side, So I don't want
to crush you because it might hurt your business. But
when it comes to this with with with Kim women,
we talked about death, like, no, his asks need to
(08:20):
be held accountable. Love Kanye, love what he's doing there,
but as a man, you know, all of us was
taught in our community, like look, private manners. Keep that
ship in the house right. Also, that's disrespectful and and
and if you need help, like you know, we do
know he's been open about his mental health. Go get
to help, Kanye. You got access to all the best resources,
all the best therapist, all the best spiritual healers. Go
(08:41):
get some help. But also is he stalking or is
he just being an asshole? Like, he's not asshole, stalk
He's not. He's not stalking here. He's just being a jerk.
He's being a jerk. They are so all gonna be okay.
Pete's gonna have another girlfriend with him with Kanye, will
move on, gonna get back together. We're going to get
(09:05):
hold on what Sam J said is the most important thing.
They're just not good jokes, that's all. If the joke
was head, we'd be like, yeah, this is great, my
panelist sticking around. When we come back, we're going to
predict the ends of the world as we know it.
And later Michael rapping Boyd's coming through Well hell of
a week in just a minute, Welcome back to Hell
(09:40):
of a Week. I'm still here with my guests Brandon Marshall,
Marianne Williamson, and Sam Jake. Now, according to a recent
report from the National Borough of Official Statistics, ship is
fucked up. And that's the direct quote. Monkey poxes head,
Polio's back, COVID never left sea levels arising, The forest
is on fire, the war in Ukraine is on and popping.
China is telling them you us to drop the location.
(10:01):
Rainwater's poisonous, civil wars looming, vicious alien predators are hunting
Native American teams, and the earth is spiraling faster than
Ezra Miller at an open bar. Okay, the world is
clearly coming to in it. The only question in my
mind is what's gonna kill us first. That's why I've
gathered this brain trust together to predict the future. In
the game I call Nostro dumbass. Now, the question before
(10:28):
my esteem panelist is how is the world going to end? In? Why?
Whoever picks closest to the right answer, when's the hell
of a week? Gift basket? Where you at? Nila? Thank you,
Queen Nila, thank you n y l A. Now, as
you can see, it includes a sign picture of Morris
chestnuts to remind you what beauty looks like. Uh, copies
(10:49):
of my books to read in the Fallout show, to
ten pounds of canned meat. Alright, a gift certificate from
me for a frank Ocean cockering. Okay, if you guess right,
come back and you get the basket. So how's the
world gonna end? Branded will start with you, how how's
the world gonna end? Colin Kaepernan is gonna take his
first knee right around August, right, and then going to
(11:12):
hit and then there's gonna be coronavirus. Okay, then there's
gonna be a war. The fucking world is coming to end.
Their human experiences over guys, like, what are we talking about?
What kind of question is that? Charlotte man, have you
not been paying attention to the last couple of years?
I'm the one who have the question. I agree with you, Okay,
that's the answer. Not getting my cock ring and move on.
(11:37):
Uh Sam Jay, how do you think the world's going in?
I think Taco Bell is gonna come out with a
new derrito wrapped who ranched burrito with some type of
hot Cheeto like puff thing inside, and they're gonna give
(11:57):
it away for free, so they, like, the whole planet
is collectively gonna fart at the same time. The amount
of C O two that goes into the atmosphere, it's
gonna cause the old zough to just dissipate and then
we're going to burn to death by the rays of
(12:17):
the center. Let's make sure Taco Bell is not a
sponsor of this show. Let me tell you my theory.
The Earth is going to prepare itself, all right. Whatever
natural immune system Earth got is gonna get rid of
this virus called humans. We are the new dinosaurs, all right,
and it's only a matter of time. We've been treating
Mother Earth like a side chick, and she's done alright.
Rising temperatures, earthquakes, hurricanes, COVID and all these other diseases.
(12:40):
Earth is fed the funk up and we're not even
gonna talk about the rising global temperatures that are causing
the permafrost smells. Okay, y'all think monkey pox is bad?
Getting ready for pterod actor pox, alright? That old school
Jurassic Park ash or ask is gonna hurt you, alright.
We were supposed to live on this planet in harmony,
all right, but instead we chose to treat the planet.
We treat each other and not on Earth is repairing
(13:02):
yourself and that means getting rid of us faster than
Kanye got rid of his dignity. All right. Uh, Marianne,
you're the expert. Well, I agree that humanity is on
a collision course with itself. We're like the Titanic headed
towards the iceberg, and we can still turn this ship around.
Why as humanity sacrificing itself for unfettered capitalism just so
that poor people can make money on nuclear bombs, can
(13:23):
make money extracting oil, and make money apparently on these viruses.
If we continue that way, I agree with you, we're
probably going down. If there is an awakening, which I
think we're actually going through, people are realizing what the
heck are we doing, and we change course, then I
absolutely believe that among us, there is enough heart, there
is enough genius, there are enough good ideas. We're gonna
(13:46):
be on this planet another hundred years because we say,
I don't know if you're gonn run for president in
the game, but she deserves the coquering. I'd like to
think Brandon Marshall, Marianne Think and Sam j for being there.
When we come back and have a conversation with Michael Rappapor, well,
hell of a week. Welcome back to hell of a
(14:19):
Week now, you know my next guest from classics like
higher learning in Copland. These days you can catch some
one who lose only murders in the building. And as
the host of the Iron Rappaport Stereo podcast, please welcome
a professional ship talker, Michael Rappaport. It's nothing, My Gods
for having me. It'sen. I'm happy, yere man, excited to
be here. You know, your friend Donald Trump had a
(14:41):
hell of a week, a hell of a week. He
came to New York yesterday to take the fifth, take
the fifth just like criminals, he said. Criminals only do that.
And I want to see this, uh, Dick stain, Donald Trump.
I picked Dick Donald Trump yeah. Yeah, We'll go down
in history as the greatest criminal in American criminals. We're up.
He's up there with the title. Tony Montana, Tony Soprano,
(15:04):
Uh sugar Knight. Donald Trump is the worst of all
of them, or the best of all of them. We
can say what made him the best? If he gets
away with it, he gets away with it. He gets
away with it. And the only thing they found in
the safe, allegedly, I can't confirm or deny this. Are
are a couple of wigs and some two paces. That's
all they found in the safe. I heard the same
You heard the same thing, right, I'm not I'm not
(15:24):
confirming or denying it. I'm just saying that's all they
found so far. This Michael Rapapole, Ladies and gentlemen. Uh now, Mike,
that's what I want to do. I want to say
some names, and I'm gonna say these names, and you
just shoot all right. We talked about them earlier. Kim
Kardashian and Pete Davidson, Big Skeet, Energy, Pete. I think
they they're all gonna wind up best friends at one point. Kanye,
(15:46):
Kim and and Pistol Pete Davidson one of the great
coxman of his era. He's don't know what that is, great,
great stickman, fantastic. He's not up there with it with
the legends like the great Derek Jeter, JFK jfk Jr.
Milton Burrow. But he's Warren Baby, Warren Baby, Jack Nicholson
and the one who surpassed all the stick men in Hollywood,
(16:09):
the Great Leonardo the Capitol fantastic Cosmid but Pistol Pete.
Davidson is on his way into my official Stickman Hall
of Fame if he keeps going at this space, at
this what he's already done, He's he should you know,
we should the Hall of Fame. Ariana Grande and Kim Kardashian.
That alone, people could retire and walk away from the game. Yeah. Yeah,
(16:33):
Now this guy, you had some beef with him in
the past. This week he's out hit making trade demands.
Mr Kevin Durant, Kevin Durant, the softest player in the
NBA that have come on out, great gain, Let him
come out. He you know what he he weighs. He
weighs thirty pounds less than mean. He's the only professional
athlete that I wouldn't be afraid to fight. Kevin Durant
had COVID three times. Okay, he's been in COVID protocol
(16:56):
more than he's one rings. The guy approved Eeve Nash.
He approved Steve Nash to coach the team. And now
you want to fire him and the g m s
who disappeared Game three, Kevin Durian gate Kyrie has disappeared
all last season. You can't blame that on Steve Nish.
And you know what Kevin Durant said, We want Steve
(17:18):
Nish and then you want to fire him and the
GM that's not the Brooklyn Wing. Get out of Brooklyn.
They should ship him up to Toronto. They should ship
up to Canada. Okay, he's he's a piggyback ring chaser
and he's seven ft tall. That's too tall to be piggyback.
Last time he damned here, he damn near gave Steph Curry,
Little Steph Curry, Hernie any disc going for that piggyback
ring in Golden State. Get out of Brooklyn, Get out
(17:41):
of New York. He had a chance to take New
York to a title. And now you want to get
the coach fight, Get out he's not gonna go anywhere,
and I don't think he's a trade out there for now.
They can't trade him. They can't. He's a great player,
bad hair, best player with the worst hair. You cannot
talk about a black man's nash Michael rap. Look, you know,
Kevin Durant looks like he got into a bicycle accident
and nobody ever came to all Right, Mike, hold on,
(18:04):
you better not cut the seat out. I'm not I
know you've got something to say on this, all right. Uh.
The governor of Indiana, he signed a bill banning nearly
all abortions. Alright. And this representati from Mississippi who's pushing
for a twelve year old instants victim to carry her
baby to turn These people should only pray and hope
(18:25):
that their daughters UH don't get pregnant and eat an abortion.
The fact that they are criminalizing abortion. That guy Philip
Gunn from Mississippi who said a twelve year old doesn't
matter if she's raped incest, uh should have to carry
the baby to term. Um. I would like to do
an experiment with him and see if I can impregnate
(18:46):
him somehow and see if he wanted to get an abortion.
And I hate to talk that way, but it's so despicable.
It's it's it's so bad. It's no, there's no pause
on that, on that, like, Yo, those people are terrible.
They're embarrassing that guy in Indiana. There was a ten
year old girl who was raped in Ohio and came
to Indiana to get an abortion, and they went after
(19:09):
the doctor who who tried to perform it. They're more
angry at the doctor than the rape of a ten
year old. It's disgusting, it's despicable. Agree, it's unacceptable, it's
un American. It's it's not even the United States, the world.
It's it's just it's crazy to think that that's where
we're at in two. It really infuriates me. His name
is Michael rab all right, and make sure you check
(19:33):
out Only Murders in the Building on Hulu when we
come back more Hell of a Week. Welcome back to
(19:55):
Hell of a Week. Now. We've talked about a lot tonight.
As Michael just mentioned Roe v. WA, it's still overturned
and abortion rights and still being canceled all over the place.
It didn't go away just because the FBI took some
paperwork from Donald Trump's mansion. All Right, the news cycle
may have changed, but the problems didn't. So I'm gonna
send you out with my man chinco Bean, who says
he's come up with a solution. I go by the
(20:16):
name of Charlemagne the God, and this is a hell
of a week. See you next Thursday. I got a
theory and I'm gonna see what you think about this. Then,
as though they overturned Rod versus way, do you think
that it should be a government mandated program to teach
man how to pull out problems? I don't know. You
don't think so, because who's gonna go to that ball?
(20:36):
Why are they gonna show you, I mean the same
way they show you anything else. You listen, I don't
want to be you know. I think that's what you
must have did. You got kids? See, now there you go,
So be sure to listen to Hell of a Week
with Charlemagne to God wherever you get your podcast. This
(20:58):
has been a Comedy Central pod Castum
You're listening to Comedy Central. This week, Joe Biden signed
the bill to make sure that folks were fraudulent p
P P loans end up in p P prison. Conspiracy
theorists me believe this was all is set up to
ruin black progress. See, if you couldn't get p P
per releaf for your legitimate business, then you probably lost
your business. And if you've got p P per releaf
(00:22):
for your fraudulent business, then you're probably going to jail.
Some would say the government killed two birds with one stone,
but I say they killed two blacks with one loan.
I go by the name of Charlemagne and God. And
it's been a hell of a week. Queen il let's
get it. Before we get started, I got to introduce
(00:56):
the best panel in late Night. He's a former NFL
wide receiver and the host of the I Am Athlete podcast,
Makes Noise For Brandon Marshall, y'all, that averrest is very fresh,
very fresh. She's a New York Times bestselling author and activist,
Mary Anne Williamson, Maryann makes and she's a comedian and
(01:19):
host of Paul's with Sam J. It's Sam J. Y'all
all right and later in the show, I'll be talking
to ship with my guy Michael Rappaport. Now a lot
happened this week. Uh. Serena william says she's retiring from
tennis after the US Open. But I know, I know,
I know. But she says she doesn't like the word retirement.
She prefers the word transition. I think someone should reminds
(01:43):
Serena in two transition doesn't meantime. It means learned. My
motherfucking pronounced okay right. Retirement sounds way more efficient than
a transition. Though, when I come out as trans I'm
gonna say I'm retiring. Put my dick in the raptors. Uh.
Doctors in China detected a new virus that they think
(02:04):
could be another pandemic. I know, man, you're thinking what
I'm thinking. Yeah, the little kids working at the Chinese
virus factory must be working over time. And Frank Oscean
is selling a thou dollar but dazzled Cockrane, that's right,
from Green Babies, the chokers on the Glyzzie. This guy's
(02:24):
doing everything. He's doing everything but making music, all right.
But I will say diamonds on the dick are a
great discraction from monkey pop craction. What it's a great discraction.
You know, let me mind my babies. That's what I
really want to talk about. Topic one. That's right on Monday,
(02:46):
the FEDS pulled up the magalago to grab Trump by
the pussy, all right, And now members of the GOP
are screaming to the fund and destroy the FBI. Marjorie
Taylor Green, Paul Gosa, I am with you. Round of applause. Okay,
these are the kinds of issues that would bring us
together because I've been screaming we should destroy the FBI
(03:06):
ever since the days of the head Nica killing and
chall the Jagahoga. All Right, I gotta say allegedly, but
as far as I know, the FBI was complicit in
the assassinations of Malcolm X, Fred Hampton, Mark Clark, and
they told Dr Martin Luther King Jr. To kill himself
just for being a faithful black man. So when you
tell me you want to destroy the FBI, I say
(03:28):
you're crazy because they might have my phone tap. But
believe me, I'm with you. Let's get rid of the
rest of the alphabet while we're at it, right, Sam
j I don't know, Bro. I was kind of even
first with the FBI this week, Oh, I was, I was, yeah,
because they was. I felt like they were just coming
around and handling all unfinished business. You know what I'm saying.
They did the Brianna Taylor thing, those cops got killed
(03:50):
on the FBI, the truck raid. I mean, it feels
like they're at least swinging in the right direction. You
mean they're doing their job, yes, okay, so I guess
when they're efficient, I'm prombi. I think we should always
have some level of healthy skepticism. But the burden of
proof right here is not on the FBI. The burden
(04:11):
of proof is on Donald Trump. He took twenty five
boxes he wasn't supposed to take. They asked for them back,
he didn't give them, and then they subpoena at him.
A subpoena doesn't mean would you please consider now? He says, Oh,
my lawyers have been have been cooperating. But if you
get a subpoena in the spring and it's August, if
(04:32):
it was any of us here, we're coming in. That's
what the government's gonna do. What do you think right now?
I mean, look, you know, we can we can debate
all we want about the FBI. You know, they're supposed
to be nonpartis. I'm so great that you so glad
that you highlighted all of that. But the end of
the day, their job is to make sure that all
(04:53):
of us are adhering to what the justice system, which
means if Donald Trump is under investigation, then Donald Trump's
house and mar Logo lar Ago is being raided, then
Donald Trump's asked, is probably going to be in jail? Okay,
do you think he's going to generally, well, I think that.
And if we're going to talk about actually being ruled
(05:13):
by law rather than people and narratives that are political,
then you're innocent until proven guilty in this country. But
so far, the way the FBI has acted, from all
appearances is according to the law. Now they will decide,
there will be there will be indictments. If there are indictments,
there will be prosecution. If there is a prosecution, and
if there is a trial, a jury will decide. And
that's how it should happen in America. Were we from
(05:36):
in the hood, right, that don't happen. We don't got
to prove ourselves. I got a couple of homeboys, a
couple of friends. You know what I'm saying. I got
a brother right now doing six years, seven years. And
it's one of those things when you know you're walking
down the street like damn, such and such guy picked
up no problem going to county jail. But when they
say FBI, people like, goddamn, what you're thing is the truth.
(06:00):
It's like when the FBI comes, we know people, but
now we're speculating he might go to jail with the FBI.
And I think it's because we've never seen him do
it to a president. That's it. We've never seen this
happen to a president because we've never had a president
so egregious, you know what I mean, Like, you know,
Trump's the first president, so don't blame that we had
(06:22):
a black president. So the adjudgments of being made, you
know what I mean? Like, so I don't know, I
don't know what's gonna happen because we've never even seen
us happen. Marianne, do you agree with that? Don't answer,
I think to Pete. Davidson and Kim Kardashian broke up
(06:42):
and Kanye West rejoiced with this lame ass Instagram post. Look, yeah,
I don't think people should play with death unless they're
ready to die. All right. You would think the same
man who wrote the album Graduation will come up with
something better. But then again, he's also the man that
said poop school scoop? Did he woop whoop the scoop depoot.
I'm gonna start with you, Brandon, Well, Kim go back
(07:04):
to black men, don't we say? Well? First, I think
it's a great question for you, is it? Is it
true once you go black you never go back? No,
but you go back and forth. Listen, listen. You know
(07:38):
it was bugged out about this. If Kanye was wasn't famous,
wouldn't he just be a stalker? Yes, but his psychological
issues are pretty well established at this point. I mean,
the country sees it and understands that no, no, no
no no no no no no no no, like this
is real, like right, because that's what we can't do, right.
We can't do that. We like Kanye phenomenal. One thing
(07:59):
is that one of the things that doing is tearing
down another brother or sister that's doing something phenomenal. Because
there's not too many of us get the opportunity, and
a lot of times what we do is we try
to get people passes because like, damn, you're doing such
a great job on this side, So I don't want
to crush you because it might hurt your business. But
when it comes to this with with with Kim women,
we talked about death, like, no, his asks need to
(08:20):
be held accountable. Love Kanye, love what he's doing there,
but as a man, you know, all of us was
taught in our community, like look, private manners. Keep that
ship in the house right. Also, that's disrespectful and and
and if you need help, like you know, we do
know he's been open about his mental health. Go get
to help, Kanye. You got access to all the best resources,
all the best therapist, all the best spiritual healers. Go
(08:41):
get some help. But also is he stalking or is
he just being an asshole? Like, he's not asshole, stalk
He's not. He's not stalking here. He's just being a jerk.
He's being a jerk. They are so all gonna be okay.
Pete's gonna have another girlfriend with him with Kanye, will
move on, gonna get back together. We're going to get
(09:05):
hold on what Sam J said is the most important thing.
They're just not good jokes, that's all. If the joke
was head, we'd be like, yeah, this is great, my
panelist sticking around. When we come back, we're going to
predict the ends of the world as we know it.
And later Michael rapping Boyd's coming through Well hell of
a week in just a minute, Welcome back to Hell
(09:40):
of a Week. I'm still here with my guests Brandon Marshall,
Marianne Williamson, and Sam Jake. Now, according to a recent
report from the National Borough of Official Statistics, ship is
fucked up. And that's the direct quote. Monkey poxes head,
Polio's back, COVID never left sea levels arising, The forest
is on fire, the war in Ukraine is on and popping.
China is telling them you us to drop the location.
(10:01):
Rainwater's poisonous, civil wars looming, vicious alien predators are hunting
Native American teams, and the earth is spiraling faster than
Ezra Miller at an open bar. Okay, the world is
clearly coming to in it. The only question in my
mind is what's gonna kill us first. That's why I've
gathered this brain trust together to predict the future. In
the game I call Nostro dumbass. Now, the question before
(10:28):
my esteem panelist is how is the world going to end? In? Why?
Whoever picks closest to the right answer, when's the hell
of a week? Gift basket? Where you at? Nila? Thank you,
Queen Nila, thank you n y l A. Now, as
you can see, it includes a sign picture of Morris
chestnuts to remind you what beauty looks like. Uh, copies
(10:49):
of my books to read in the Fallout show, to
ten pounds of canned meat. Alright, a gift certificate from
me for a frank Ocean cockering. Okay, if you guess right,
come back and you get the basket. So how's the
world gonna end? Branded will start with you, how how's
the world gonna end? Colin Kaepernan is gonna take his
first knee right around August, right, and then going to
(11:12):
hit and then there's gonna be coronavirus. Okay, then there's
gonna be a war. The fucking world is coming to end.
Their human experiences over guys, like, what are we talking about?
What kind of question is that? Charlotte man, have you
not been paying attention to the last couple of years?
I'm the one who have the question. I agree with you, Okay,
that's the answer. Not getting my cock ring and move on.
(11:37):
Uh Sam Jay, how do you think the world's going in?
I think Taco Bell is gonna come out with a
new derrito wrapped who ranched burrito with some type of
hot Cheeto like puff thing inside, and they're gonna give
(11:57):
it away for free, so they, like, the whole planet
is collectively gonna fart at the same time. The amount
of C O two that goes into the atmosphere, it's
gonna cause the old zough to just dissipate and then
we're going to burn to death by the rays of
(12:17):
the center. Let's make sure Taco Bell is not a
sponsor of this show. Let me tell you my theory.
The Earth is going to prepare itself, all right. Whatever
natural immune system Earth got is gonna get rid of
this virus called humans. We are the new dinosaurs, all right,
and it's only a matter of time. We've been treating
Mother Earth like a side chick, and she's done alright.
Rising temperatures, earthquakes, hurricanes, COVID and all these other diseases.
(12:40):
Earth is fed the funk up and we're not even
gonna talk about the rising global temperatures that are causing
the permafrost smells. Okay, y'all think monkey pox is bad?
Getting ready for pterod actor pox, alright? That old school
Jurassic Park ash or ask is gonna hurt you, alright.
We were supposed to live on this planet in harmony,
all right, but instead we chose to treat the planet.
We treat each other and not on Earth is repairing
(13:02):
yourself and that means getting rid of us faster than
Kanye got rid of his dignity. All right. Uh, Marianne,
you're the expert. Well, I agree that humanity is on
a collision course with itself. We're like the Titanic headed
towards the iceberg, and we can still turn this ship around.
Why as humanity sacrificing itself for unfettered capitalism just so
that poor people can make money on nuclear bombs, can
(13:23):
make money extracting oil, and make money apparently on these viruses.
If we continue that way, I agree with you, we're
probably going down. If there is an awakening, which I
think we're actually going through, people are realizing what the
heck are we doing, and we change course, then I
absolutely believe that among us, there is enough heart, there
is enough genius, there are enough good ideas. We're gonna
(13:46):
be on this planet another hundred years because we say,
I don't know if you're gonn run for president in
the game, but she deserves the coquering. I'd like to
think Brandon Marshall, Marianne Think and Sam j for being there.
When we come back and have a conversation with Michael Rappapor, well,
hell of a week. Welcome back to hell of a
(14:19):
Week now, you know my next guest from classics like
higher learning in Copland. These days you can catch some
one who lose only murders in the building. And as
the host of the Iron Rappaport Stereo podcast, please welcome
a professional ship talker, Michael Rappaport. It's nothing, My Gods
for having me. It'sen. I'm happy, yere man, excited to
be here. You know, your friend Donald Trump had a
(14:41):
hell of a week, a hell of a week. He
came to New York yesterday to take the fifth, take
the fifth just like criminals, he said. Criminals only do that.
And I want to see this, uh, Dick stain, Donald Trump.
I picked Dick Donald Trump yeah. Yeah, We'll go down
in history as the greatest criminal in American criminals. We're up.
He's up there with the title. Tony Montana, Tony Soprano,
(15:04):
Uh sugar Knight. Donald Trump is the worst of all
of them, or the best of all of them. We
can say what made him the best? If he gets
away with it, he gets away with it. He gets
away with it. And the only thing they found in
the safe, allegedly, I can't confirm or deny this. Are
are a couple of wigs and some two paces. That's
all they found in the safe. I heard the same
You heard the same thing, right, I'm not I'm not
(15:24):
confirming or denying it. I'm just saying that's all they
found so far. This Michael Rapapole, Ladies and gentlemen. Uh now, Mike,
that's what I want to do. I want to say
some names, and I'm gonna say these names, and you
just shoot all right. We talked about them earlier. Kim
Kardashian and Pete Davidson, Big Skeet, Energy, Pete. I think
they they're all gonna wind up best friends at one point. Kanye,
(15:46):
Kim and and Pistol Pete Davidson one of the great
coxman of his era. He's don't know what that is, great,
great stickman, fantastic. He's not up there with it with
the legends like the great Derek Jeter, JFK jfk Jr.
Milton Burrow. But he's Warren Baby, Warren Baby, Jack Nicholson
and the one who surpassed all the stick men in Hollywood,
(16:09):
the Great Leonardo the Capitol fantastic Cosmid but Pistol Pete.
Davidson is on his way into my official Stickman Hall
of Fame if he keeps going at this space, at
this what he's already done, He's he should you know,
we should the Hall of Fame. Ariana Grande and Kim Kardashian.
That alone, people could retire and walk away from the game. Yeah. Yeah,
(16:33):
Now this guy, you had some beef with him in
the past. This week he's out hit making trade demands.
Mr Kevin Durant, Kevin Durant, the softest player in the
NBA that have come on out, great gain, Let him
come out. He you know what he he weighs. He
weighs thirty pounds less than mean. He's the only professional
athlete that I wouldn't be afraid to fight. Kevin Durant
had COVID three times. Okay, he's been in COVID protocol
(16:56):
more than he's one rings. The guy approved Eeve Nash.
He approved Steve Nash to coach the team. And now
you want to fire him and the g m s
who disappeared Game three, Kevin Durian gate Kyrie has disappeared
all last season. You can't blame that on Steve Nish.
And you know what Kevin Durant said, We want Steve
(17:18):
Nish and then you want to fire him and the
GM that's not the Brooklyn Wing. Get out of Brooklyn.
They should ship him up to Toronto. They should ship
up to Canada. Okay, he's he's a piggyback ring chaser
and he's seven ft tall. That's too tall to be piggyback.
Last time he damned here, he damn near gave Steph Curry,
Little Steph Curry, Hernie any disc going for that piggyback
ring in Golden State. Get out of Brooklyn, Get out
(17:41):
of New York. He had a chance to take New
York to a title. And now you want to get
the coach fight, Get out he's not gonna go anywhere,
and I don't think he's a trade out there for now.
They can't trade him. They can't. He's a great player,
bad hair, best player with the worst hair. You cannot
talk about a black man's nash Michael rap. Look, you know,
Kevin Durant looks like he got into a bicycle accident
and nobody ever came to all Right, Mike, hold on,
(18:04):
you better not cut the seat out. I'm not I
know you've got something to say on this, all right. Uh.
The governor of Indiana, he signed a bill banning nearly
all abortions. Alright. And this representati from Mississippi who's pushing
for a twelve year old instants victim to carry her
baby to turn These people should only pray and hope
(18:25):
that their daughters UH don't get pregnant and eat an abortion.
The fact that they are criminalizing abortion. That guy Philip
Gunn from Mississippi who said a twelve year old doesn't
matter if she's raped incest, uh should have to carry
the baby to term. Um. I would like to do
an experiment with him and see if I can impregnate
(18:46):
him somehow and see if he wanted to get an abortion.
And I hate to talk that way, but it's so despicable.
It's it's it's so bad. It's no, there's no pause
on that, on that, like, Yo, those people are terrible.
They're embarrassing that guy in Indiana. There was a ten
year old girl who was raped in Ohio and came
to Indiana to get an abortion, and they went after
(19:09):
the doctor who who tried to perform it. They're more
angry at the doctor than the rape of a ten
year old. It's disgusting, it's despicable. Agree, it's unacceptable, it's
un American. It's it's not even the United States, the world.
It's it's just it's crazy to think that that's where
we're at in two. It really infuriates me. His name
is Michael rab all right, and make sure you check
(19:33):
out Only Murders in the Building on Hulu when we
come back more Hell of a Week. Welcome back to
(19:55):
Hell of a Week. Now. We've talked about a lot tonight.
As Michael just mentioned Roe v. WA, it's still overturned
and abortion rights and still being canceled all over the place.
It didn't go away just because the FBI took some
paperwork from Donald Trump's mansion. All Right, the news cycle
may have changed, but the problems didn't. So I'm gonna
send you out with my man chinco Bean, who says
he's come up with a solution. I go by the
(20:16):
name of Charlemagne the God, and this is a hell
of a week. See you next Thursday. I got a
theory and I'm gonna see what you think about this. Then,
as though they overturned Rod versus way, do you think
that it should be a government mandated program to teach
man how to pull out problems? I don't know. You
don't think so, because who's gonna go to that ball?
(20:36):
Why are they gonna show you, I mean the same
way they show you anything else. You listen, I don't
want to be you know. I think that's what you
must have did. You got kids? See, now there you go,
So be sure to listen to Hell of a Week
with Charlemagne to God wherever you get your podcast. This
(20:58):
has been a Comedy Central pod Castum
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