February 4, 2024 • 35 mins
In this episode of The Success Palette, I am joined by special guest and motivational speaker, Claire Garner. Together, we explore the integral concept of understanding our 'why' as creatives and delineate the power of stepping out of our comfort zones.
We dive into Claire's story, moving from adversity to fruitfulness, setting the stage for a powerful dialogue about purpose, fear and fostering a readiness to continuously assimilate and adapt.
Placing emphasis on establishing a connection with our fundamental values, the practices that fill us with joy, and life events that mold us, Claire masterfully illustrates that our 'why' develops with us as we overcome hurdles and reinvent ourselves. She presents the 'why' as a steady anchor during instances of self-doubt or fear of failure.
As the talk progresses, the discussion centers around combatting fear, transforming it into motivation for our aspirations, thereby charting a direct course to realize our potentials. This conversation serves as a beacon of enlightenment and empowerment for anyone grappling with understanding their purpose or owning their creative presence.
Claire underlines the critical role of action in unraveling our 'why', inspiring listeners to commence their journey without fears of making mistakes. Through examples of her own triumphs across multiple ventures, she demonstrates how incorporating core values can positively influence outcomes, fostering an environment of excitement, liberty, and gratification.
The discussion further embraces the importance of flexibility and the usage of unique creativity when navigating the path to success. Learn about staying committed to your mission while adapting without compromising individuality and understand how to draw like-minded people to support your cause.
We close by offering valuable advice on managing setbacks and pushing past the banes of self-sabotage. Garner urges listeners to be bold, to dream big and only seek guidance from people who exude the life they admire.
This invigorating episode of The Success Palette will leave you armed with practical wisdom to confront your fears, harness self-belief, and transform your passions into success stories. Visit TheSuccessPalette.com for more valuable resources. Embark on this enlightening journey that promises to ignite your passion and propel you toward success.
Claire Garner Masterclass: https://phoenix-rise.mykajabi.com/fear-to-fuel
Crystal Store: https://www.fullmooncrystals.co.uk
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello, hello, everyone. You are listening to The Success Palette,
a place to discuss everything they don’t teach you in school about how to be successful in the arts
I'm your host, Soda, and today we are going to talk about our why as creatives,
why we create, and how that can help us get out of our comfort zone.
(00:23):
So to help me out with that, I have invited Claire Garner, who who is a motivational
speaker, primarily for women, but anyone can benefit from her wisdom.
So Claire, tell us a little bit about your story and how you were able to come
out of your comfort zone to reach your goals.
Yeah, sure. And thank you so much for having me. It's a real pleasure to be here.
(00:46):
And my purpose in life is to empower as many women as possible.
So yeah, really grateful to be able to touch some lives in your space.
So yeah, I'll just give you you a little bit of the background for my
story so it's one of adversity to abundance
okay so I was not born into a silver spoon I was not born with any kind of silver
(01:08):
plate in my life it was very much the opposite grew up in a tiny little seaside
town in in North Devon in England right so if you're not in England you won't
even know where I'm talking about it's like that minute I knew.
And it was one of those places where aspirations, ambitions were not big, to say the least.
It was very much you get what you're given, you make do.
(01:31):
And it was very much the kind of the survival mindset, right?
The poverty mindset of this is our lot.
This is the cards that we've been dealt this is
my life and for me as a
young kid kind of early teenager I always knew I always knew inside that I was
(01:52):
meant for something more that I was meant for something bigger brighter better
right but the world around me was very quick to put that light out they were very quick to say.
Who the hell do you think you are?
Who are you to think that you can be something? You left school at 16.
You can't do that. That's not for people like us, like you.
(02:17):
And so that light was dimmed for a long, long time.
And even though I felt it, I felt the yearning, I felt the burning,
the knowing that I was meant for more, that I wasn't here for ordinary,
that I was somehow somehow meant for extraordinary
I just didn't know how and life
(02:39):
threw me a curveball and at 18 I got in an
abusive relationship for the next 15 years and
my life story then really consists of coming home from high-level meetings stepping
out into that entrepreneurial world feeling like I was finally amounting to
something right feeling like I was finally forging this path to feeling afraid
(03:03):
to open my own front door.
And what happened is year after year, it felt like there was a bit less of me.
It felt like my dreams were being ripped away from me, like I had no control in my destiny.
It was just like, it was out of reach.
Until my daughter's 13th birthday, where
(03:26):
she was opening her presents surrounded by packing boxes as
I finally mustered up
the courage to leave and it was in that
moment that I realized that I needed
to lead by example I needed to be the
role model for my girls because I wanted them
to believe that they could have a life of their dreams and that it wasn't just
(03:48):
possible that it was inevitable and that they could make them their reality
and so I lent into the fear and I I transmuted it to feed the yearning and to
ignite the burning and to become the person that I was here to be.
And that's the life of a visionary, right? And this is what I'm so passionate about.
(04:08):
Empowering others to do, to lean into that fear, to transmute it as your fuel
and to project you into the life that you're truly here to live.
That hit me really, really hard, especially as someone who, you know,
did, I came from a very abusive childhood and I've always felt that if I didn't
(04:31):
get noticed, then I wouldn't have to go through the abuse.
So I made myself unnoticeable. I made myself invisible for so long.
And a lot of us in the arts, we are scared to kind of show up.
What are some of the ways that we can kind of slowly step out?
(04:51):
Because I know If you suddenly, speaking in front of millions of people,
it might be a little nerve wracking, but can you talk about some of the ways
we can slowly get out of that invisible mindset? Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, there's so much kind of unpacking to be done, right?
But it all starts with your, well, there's three points that I really want to touch on.
(05:12):
So your big why, your purpose, and then transmuting the fear.
So I'll start with the big why.
So no matter what industry you're in, no matter what your gifts are,
what you're here to do in the world, right?
It doesn't matter your channel of how you do it, whether it's writing,
whether it's painting, whether it's talking, whatever it is,
(05:33):
I believe everyone is here for a reason.
Everyone is here to fulfill a certain purpose.
Now, your why, that purpose has to be so full body, powerful,
all encompassing, all overwhelming because
(05:55):
if that why is not
big enough it will not be able to combat the imposter
syndrome it will not be able to combat the fear of failure it won't be able
to combat the fear of rejection the fear of criticism all of these obstacles
that you will inevitably get as you grow as you expand as you put yourself out
there so your why needs to be your anchor it needs to be be your North Star, your compass.
(06:21):
It needs to be the reason behind every single thing that you do.
And it needs to be so important to every essence of your being.
That you are willing to get uncomfortable, that you're willing to put yourself
out there, to have stones thrown at you, because inevitably you will not be
(06:42):
for everyone. No one is for everyone.
And you will only achieve a level of success that you are able to allow the
level of criticism and the level of failure, because no one is an overnight success.
There are many, many, many failures in the background. I've failed more times
than most people have even tried.
And that's why I'm successful because I get up and I go again.
(07:06):
And I know that my purpose is so important that nothing will knock me down for good.
I will always keep trying because it's my magnet. It's my pull.
It's why my soul came to this world.
So the first thing to get really really clear on is your why.
Not the big house, not the status, not the car.
(07:30):
Those are all great. And I am an advocate of abundance and wealth.
And if you want nice things, go for it. I love that. Female empowerment wealth, hell yes.
But that is not a big enough why to overcome the hurdles, to overcome the obstacles.
So what is the why for your soul?
So I'll give you an example. For me, it is to
(07:51):
empower as many women as I possibly
can in my life to stop making do
to stop settling to stop
sacrificing their dreams for the life that they have and to start playing big
to start following what they truly know inside that they're here for because
(08:14):
when you know that you're here for something bigger, better, brighter.
You know, you can't explain it to anyone. You just know.
And those are the people that I'm passionate about making sure you don't give
that, put that to waste, right?
Don't waste it because your soul is here to fulfill it.
So that's my first, my first step.
(08:37):
Yeah, I completely agree with purpose being the biggest driver and that's what's helped me.
But I know that a lot of the people who I've talked with in my community,
especially in my art group, have told me that they feel stuck because they don't
know their why. and haven't been able to figure out.
So they feel that they don't deserve to step out and show their work.
(09:01):
And I was wondering if you could talk a little bit about how we can discover
our why, especially for those of us who have been in survival mode for so long.
You know, we're just all about surviving. We don't think about why as much.
Yeah, I love that. And that's really, really really important
and I was that person right I didn't know my why
(09:22):
and that's part of the reason why it took me 10 years to
start my first business because I didn't know what I was
meant to do I was like what if I get this wrong
you know what if this is not the right thing and I
knew that I was meant to be something
to be someone but I didn't know what I would you know what
that looked like what I was meant to do and so what happens
(09:42):
is we kind of end up using that as an excuse
to not take any action because it's just that fear of
getting it wrong and the fact of the matter is
is if you don't know your why now the path will
be shown as you take action as you
move forwards but it's very hard to know your why
if you're sitting around wondering what it is and
(10:04):
the clearest way that you will get that is to
start moving make a move do
something something and it will either feel good
or it won't and if it doesn't then
look to a different avenue look to a different
path look to what lights you up i would say your why is within
you right it's not something that you need to create
(10:26):
it's something that is within you already you just.
Need to really connect with yourself with
your intuition with your soul with your you know
know whatever you want to call it your spirit connect with that
divine energy source within us all and
feel into it like I
always knew when I was at school I
(10:48):
was always told that the one
thing I was the most passionate about was the
thing that I should be the most worried about it was the thing
that would hinder me the most it was the thing that would hold me back the most and that
was was talking always a talker always talking
right in lessons in detention like all the time talk and obviously at school
(11:10):
that's not what the teachers wanted but I had it drilled into me that my gift.
Was something that was not a gift it was something that was a hindrance it was something that would,
like block my journey and so
when you're looking at what is my why think back
to your childhood think back to what
(11:33):
was it that I was always really passionate about or good at if you knew that
you were good at the time I didn't know I was good at talking I just knew I
loved it and that will give you clues you know the universe leaves you clues
everywhere and then look at your hurdles look at at your mountains.
So your why can change over time.
(11:56):
So for me, my why before I was in an abusive relationship has always been about
empowering women, but it was in a very different way when I was in an abusive
relationship, obviously, because I was not empowered myself.
So I was just doing what I could at the time with who I was at the time.
Now, my why is in a much bigger bigger scale because I am a different version of me. I have healed.
(12:24):
I've overcome my mountains. That's not to say there won't be more,
but that particular mountain I've overcome and I can now stand on the other
side and I can help others navigate that. So think about your mountains.
Think about your hurdles and think about your natural gifts.
If you've always been good at writing, then your why is to share your message
(12:46):
with the world through your writing.
If it's you know art and that's
something I actually used to be really good at art when
I was a kid which wasn't a passion for me but
if that's something that you're passionate about and something
that lights up your whole body that's what you're meant to do if you desire
to do something it's because you're meant for it you're meant to follow that
(13:11):
path what lights you up that's such a good point that it doesn't always have
to be this, I'm going to change the world or whatever.
It could just be sharing something that you love to do.
And what are some of the things that, I know you like talking,
but what are some of the other things that you love to do that have helped you?
(13:35):
Because I know you have several successful businesses and
I would love to hear about some of the things
you love to do that you've implemented implemented in creating
those businesses so for me
it's about connecting with your core values okay so my
core values are fun freedom and fulfillment they
are free non-negotiables for
(13:57):
me so no matter what I do in any industry in any business in in even in my personal
life if it doesn't give me fun freedom or fulfillment I'm out it's like it's
just a no because I no no longer subscribe to doing things that people tell
me I have to do or that I should do or that I'm meant to do.
I get to choose what I do.
(14:18):
Whether I want to do it. It's up to me, just as it's up to you.
You don't have to do anything.
You are the CEO of your life. No matter what you do, no matter what your role
is, you are the CEO of your life. You get to hire and fire.
You get to write your story, what it's going to look like. You get to dictate
(14:38):
how the journey goes, ultimately.
And we can give our power away to so so many things to so many people,
to our circumstances, to our ecology, to our upbringing, to this, that, the other.
But ultimately, it's all down to us.
So fun, freedom, and fulfillment are my core values. So the first thing I would
say is figure out your core values. What are they?
(15:00):
And integrate those into everything that you do.
Because I have three businesses at the moment. I'm birthing a fourth and potentially a fifth as well.
So I'm a multi-passionate, right?
I have lots of different interests, but they all come under empowerment and
they all provide fun, freedom and fulfillment. So I have a corporate business.
(15:24):
I delegate in it. I stay in my 5% area of genius, which is communication.
Relationship building, being the brand, being the vision.
The rest, I delegate to the team because I learn how to trust and let go.
That business gives me fun, freedom, and fulfillment, gives me fun to do whatever
I want to do in my personal life, gives me the freedom to do that.
(15:47):
And it fulfills me knowing that I'm helping not only my team, but my clients.
I have a crystal business. So we sell ethically sourced crystals,
which we're now looking to scale on a quantum level,
something I've never ever done before like we're talking this is
me out of my comfort zone right but I
love crystals they helped me heal from my
(16:09):
abusive relationship they helped me manifest my first six figures
in my first business they helped me do so many things and
we're not talking about crystals but they they helped me so much I'm
so passionate about them that business gives
me fun freedom and fulfillment and what
I love about that business is my eldest daughter now runs it so
it's like I get to now watch her step into
(16:30):
her light and step into her power and really
embrace who she wants to be and well she's
17 right the amount of criticism I
got for her not being in college or going to uni because she wanted to be an
entrepreneur to follow her mum who am I to say no you know look at me I left
school at 16 but I get I get to
(16:54):
watch my daughter do that and that's something that I'm so, so proud of.
And then obviously my third business, which is Phoenix, which encompasses a lot of things.
So coaching, online courses, speaking.
And also we're building retreats for next year. So all about female empowerment, okay?
All about empowering female entrepreneurs to step into their light,
(17:18):
embrace their gifts, embrace their spirituality, embrace their divine feminine,
embrace who they're here to be and become that visionary.
So the three main things there are your core values. What are they?
And then look at anything that you wanna do or that you are doing already does
(17:39):
it give you those three if not it's time to reassess yeah and i'm gonna have
to pick your brain about crystals after because i.
Love need some crystals what are
some what are your social do you
have them on social media or where could we find you yeah
we have um yeah i can
(17:59):
give you the links after but we have the the website is full moon crystals
instagram is full dot moon dot
crystals 21 just like all we could have um but yeah
i can give you the links to those after perfect i will put those in because
i will nerd i could just talk like for hours yeah yeah i'm i'm planning on doing
(18:23):
a full episode about crystals and creativity so So we'll have to reconnect.
And I love what you said about being the CEO of your own life,
because that's something that I tell myself a lot.
And I think about some of these successful CEOs during the pandemic and how
they were able to adapt when things went awry.
(18:48):
What are some of the ways that you've been able to use adapting in order to
succeed in your passions and career?
I think adapting is an interesting word
and I think for me I've never
really classed myself as a an innovator okay
so I when I remember being like a teenager and
(19:09):
always saying out loud you know I'm not
an innovator like I can't I'm not gonna think of
like creating a camera right I'm not gonna think of
creating like a telly like I'm not one of those like inventors and
so I think we we can get caught up in
that thought process of we have to reinvent the
(19:30):
wheel and we don't have to reinvent the wheel
because the fact of the matter is is that you are here
to help certain people i'm here
to help certain people you're here to help certain people everyone listening
is here to help certain people in my opinion and so you can be doing exactly
the same as what someone you know beside you is doing but you will attract different
(19:52):
people because you have your you your own unique frequency,
your own unique gifts, your own unique story. You could be doing it.
You know, it's the whole reason of why two people can go and watch a film together
and they come out, one loved it, one hated it, because everyone has their own different realities.
Everyone has their own different perceptions, their own, based on their own journeys, right?
(20:13):
So in regards to adaption, I don't think you need to be, in my opinion,
I don't think you need to be too kind of worried about that,
I think just stay true to what you're here to do.
You don't have to know every step of the way. The way will be shown.
You just have to move. You just have to see the next step.
(20:35):
Because if you're always moving towards the next step, the rest of them will reveal themselves.
So for me, I have a North Star. I have my next step.
And the rest I release to the universe. verse and I
trust that it will be given to me once I'm ready for
that next level so in regards to adaption yeah I
think I'm a little bit on the fence about that word and I think just
(20:56):
focus on you don't worry about what anyone else is
doing stay in your lane focus on your north star focus on your purpose focus
on your big why and the path will be shown your job is to take aligned action
to move you closer to that north star that's it don't worry about the rest yeah
the reason I asked about kind of adoption,
(21:18):
being adaptable is because earlier you were talking about core values and how important it is.
And I know right now, there are a lot of genres and communities and platforms
and such that are being canceled.
I was on I was very successful on a platform that ended up going against my core beliefs.
(21:41):
And I had to think about, again, reassess what are my values. And.
It was hard. It felt like I was grieving something when it didn't work out.
So I want to talk about kind of failures and how
you deal with these situations where you end
(22:04):
up having these setbacks and how you kind
of get through that and don't let it affect your vision
and go back into that small person that you
used to be yeah so yeah so
so important a topic because failure is part of success right no one achieves
(22:25):
success without failing and if you're not willing to fail then you're not willing
to achieve success because you can't you can't have one without It's the law of duality, right?
They just don't exist on their own singularly.
So what you were talking about there.
It resonates with me a lot. And I'll just give you an example.
So for me, I pivoted my Instagram handle, my main Instagram handle earlier this
(22:50):
year. Okay, so it used to be for my crystal business.
And then when I birthed Phoenix, for whatever reason, whatever divine reason
be unknown to me, I decided to use that same account and to just,
you know, change my messaging on it.
Now, obviously, with algorithms, it doesn't always like change.
And so I went from 10k followers down
to seven and I would get
(23:14):
stuck like my views went from
thousands to like lucky if I hit 10 right we're
talking like drastic change and for
quite a while I did get sucked into that mindset of
I would wake up in the morning I would look
at my phone my nervous system would
be completely shot it was was
(23:35):
like that fight or flight right it was like everyone hates me
and I would wake up with the
feeling how many people have left me today and I
would look at my followers and sometimes I would
cry and I would it would make me relive all
of those feelings of rejection of not being good
enough why don't people like me you know I'm
(23:56):
just trying to help people why don't they want me you know all
of this like healing wound stuff it brought back
up to me and that hit me for a
good a couple months because I'm human okay we're all human and
we all have triggers we all have traumas
and we're never healed we're just healing we're just doing the best that we
(24:18):
can as we heal no one's ever fully healed and she doesn't exist and so I finally
realized that Claire hang on a minute it.
You've built two six-figure businesses outside of Instagram.
This is not the end of the world.
You know how to grow a business. You know how you can help people.
(24:43):
You know how you can reach people.
These are just not your people. And it took that mindset shift to really kick me out of that.
And And I actively went into my followers and deleted people.
Didn't know them. Just if I, I swear to God, I would just scroll.
(25:05):
And if I just landed on something, I wouldn't even look at their profile. If I just...
Didn't resonate, I just deleted them. Because I needed to take back that control.
Because it wasn't people leaving me. It was me making space for my right people.
And we have to sometimes release in order to allow, right?
(25:26):
We have to release maybe people that are no longer meant for us,
maybe people that are holding us back,
maybe clients that are not aligned with us,
you know opportunities that don't resonate with us all of this stuff sometimes
we have to release that in order to move forwards and so it's the mindset shift
of what you can deem as a failure in the first instance or rejection or you
(25:52):
know all of these narratives.
What am i being taught here what is the lesson here and for me it was about
release because i I was always the control freak, right?
I was always like, I need to control everything.
And it was in that surrender that came my serenity. It was in that surrender that came my...
(26:16):
Sense of safety that came my ease of mind
didn't impact my income because I was already
making the income my income has never
come from my followers that was not even
part of the thing it was just like
the sense that it gave me of being
a failure of for whatever reason being
(26:37):
rejected and so when these things
happen it's looking for the lesson what is the
lesson that I need to learn here because that is what
you need to know to get to the next stage of you
you can't become who you want to be until
you learn this lesson and every failure that
you have i mean i don't even believe in the word failure the only failure
(26:58):
is not to try right because then you never even know but the
only failure that we deem is that because of whatever outcome we've placed on
it that we desire that's all that it is it either matches that or it doesn't
so whatever we deem is that failure failure what is the lesson what is the lesson
in this failure because when you learn that,
(27:19):
that's when the next opportunity will show up that's when the healing will take
place that's when you will start to become the next version of you because the
person that you want to be.
Like you're here and they're here and you
have to bridge that gap and the only way to bridge
that gap is by slowly embodying different
(27:42):
layers of their identity and that
means learning things that they know that means overcoming things that they've
overcome that means having different perceptions that they've learned through
all of the failures that you need to go through that gave me goosebumps to think
about I now I think about all my failures in the past and how much I learned from them so I love that.
(28:04):
And I know we only have about 10 minutes left before you need to get going.
But I had just two quick questions.
One is how for those who are starting to see success and feeling plateaued, though,
what are some ways that they can push themselves to get out of that plateau
(28:27):
mode and continue to grow?
So plateau is a form of self-sabotage,
it's that uncertainty right of i don't really know what i want to do next so i'll do nothing at all,
you know i'm just going to stay where i am until i feel more ready
or until i have more more certainty and the fact is that never happens
it's it's a form of self-sabotage of your subconscious keeping you exactly where
(28:49):
you are because this is your new safety zone this is your new comfort zone and
so to get out of that plateau we have to stretch that comfort zone right so
i like to think of it as like a bubble like your paradigm is your bubble that
you are in and if If you're plateaued,
this is your subconscious saying,
I want to stay in this bubble. I don't want to move anywhere.
And so what we have to do is just slowly stretch that.
(29:12):
Because if you try and just break it, it just rebuilds and brings you right back in.
You can't do that. You just have to stretch it until a new bubble has formed.
And so the way that we do that is by, again, looking at the next step.
What is one thing, one thing that you can do today to take you closer to your North Star?
(29:33):
To take you close to you. It doesn't have to be a big thing.
But one thing that you've been putting off, one thing that you know you want
to do, that you're meant to do, because the thing that scares you the most is
the thing that is meant for you the most, right?
Fear is the same as excitement in our body. It knows no difference.
It's only your breath. And so what you need to do is really really
lean into that fear and use it
(29:54):
as your fuel because that is the it's the roadblock it's the it's the wall between
you and where you want to be and the only way you get to where you want to be
is by jumping over that wall or smashing through it so just start to take away the bricks,
(30:14):
start to take away the bricks one at a time. And that is by doing one thing
at a time, one step at a time.
Don't think about, you know, the gap between where I am now and where I want
to be is like a million pounds.
Think about, okay, maybe how can I, I don't know, make an extra 10k next month?
How can I get in front of 10 more people next week?
(30:37):
You know, wherever you're at, whatever you're doing what is
a smaller goal that you can start
to now move towards because it's
the compound effect right it's the incremental steps
from now to where you
want to be that's how you get there and that's
(30:58):
when you wake up suddenly and you're
like I've quantum leaped my whole world has changed when
the real facts of the matter is you've been working on this for the last five
years it's just like you suddenly wake up and you're like everything has changed
yeah it feels like everything has changed but actually you've been making those
changes incrementally for the last however long since you started consciously
(31:19):
being aware of it right so.
Yeah to get out of that plateau just stretch
the bubble just take away one brick
at a time by looking at your next tangible
real i don't like the word realistic but your next
it's also about a word that we can use like achievable
goal don't make it unachievable because sometimes
(31:41):
your subconscious will just reject it because it just seems too far away so
what is your next achievable goal that you can work towards and focus on that
because then you'll have less cognitive dissonance you're less likely to self-sabotage
it and you're less likely to kind kind of get in your own way.
That actually also kind of answers my last question I wanted to ask,
(32:04):
but it kind of goes along with it.
I know a lot of people do understand that they need to take that step out of
their comfort zone, but they don't know how to.
Do you have any resources or tips
on how we can get help in
that process of getting over this
(32:26):
this fear of stepping out of our comfort zone and
also any last thoughts before we end yeah definitely
um and actually perfect timing because i literally just this morning
finished making it so i had
now have a real low ticket offer is 33 pounds as
an introductory price to learn how
to to actually transmute your fear so learn the science
(32:48):
behind it become aware of how it shows up and then
there's some tangible actionable tools that you can start implementing
into your life into your business right now to get
it out of the way right to smash through that brick wall to
start moving those bricks to start using it as
your fuel to propel you into the future that you want
so i can give you the link for that yes 33 pound
(33:09):
it's valued at 250 and it's lifetime access you
get it it for forever and it's it's one of those things that you don't know
you need it until you until you do the work and then you're like oh my god so
I would love to um yeah to share that with everyone and I think just a last
message that I would love to share would just be to believe in yourself.
(33:30):
To believe that your dreams were given to you for a reason because you are the
only person person that is able to live them, that is able to materialize them,
that is able to fulfill them.
That is why they don't make sense to anyone else, because they're only meant for you.
So don't take advice from anyone who is not living the life that you want,
(33:51):
because they haven't been where you need to get to.
They don't have the tools, they don't have the experience, they haven't been
on that journey to offer you any kind of sound advice that is going to be helpful to you.
So put your earplugs in to anyone that is not on that journey and already living
that life and follow your dreams, follow your North Star and believe it is all
(34:12):
possible because whatever you believe is what will be true to you.
I love that statement. Whatever you believe will be true to you.
And if you don't believe in yourself, how could you expect others to believe in you too?
So that was really powerful for me. I personally needed to hear everything that you said today.
(34:32):
So I am extremely grateful that you were able to meet.
And of course, thank you to everyone who tuned into this week's episode of the
success palette about finding our why as creatives for social links and additional bonus episodes.
Go to the success palette dot com. Thank you and make it a successful week.
Hello, hello, everyone. You are listening to The Success Palette,
a place to discuss everything they don’t teach you in school about how to be successful in the arts
I'm your host, Soda, and today we are going to talk about our why as creatives,
why we create, and how that can help us get out of our comfort zone.
(00:23):
So to help me out with that, I have invited Claire Garner, who who is a motivational
speaker, primarily for women, but anyone can benefit from her wisdom.
So Claire, tell us a little bit about your story and how you were able to come
out of your comfort zone to reach your goals.
Yeah, sure. And thank you so much for having me. It's a real pleasure to be here.
(00:46):
And my purpose in life is to empower as many women as possible.
So yeah, really grateful to be able to touch some lives in your space.
So yeah, I'll just give you you a little bit of the background for my
story so it's one of adversity to abundance
okay so I was not born into a silver spoon I was not born with any kind of silver
(01:08):
plate in my life it was very much the opposite grew up in a tiny little seaside
town in in North Devon in England right so if you're not in England you won't
even know where I'm talking about it's like that minute I knew.
And it was one of those places where aspirations, ambitions were not big, to say the least.
It was very much you get what you're given, you make do.
(01:31):
And it was very much the kind of the survival mindset, right?
The poverty mindset of this is our lot.
This is the cards that we've been dealt this is
my life and for me as a
young kid kind of early teenager I always knew I always knew inside that I was
(01:52):
meant for something more that I was meant for something bigger brighter better
right but the world around me was very quick to put that light out they were very quick to say.
Who the hell do you think you are?
Who are you to think that you can be something? You left school at 16.
You can't do that. That's not for people like us, like you.
(02:17):
And so that light was dimmed for a long, long time.
And even though I felt it, I felt the yearning, I felt the burning,
the knowing that I was meant for more, that I wasn't here for ordinary,
that I was somehow somehow meant for extraordinary
I just didn't know how and life
(02:39):
threw me a curveball and at 18 I got in an
abusive relationship for the next 15 years and
my life story then really consists of coming home from high-level meetings stepping
out into that entrepreneurial world feeling like I was finally amounting to
something right feeling like I was finally forging this path to feeling afraid
(03:03):
to open my own front door.
And what happened is year after year, it felt like there was a bit less of me.
It felt like my dreams were being ripped away from me, like I had no control in my destiny.
It was just like, it was out of reach.
Until my daughter's 13th birthday, where
(03:26):
she was opening her presents surrounded by packing boxes as
I finally mustered up
the courage to leave and it was in that
moment that I realized that I needed
to lead by example I needed to be the
role model for my girls because I wanted them
to believe that they could have a life of their dreams and that it wasn't just
(03:48):
possible that it was inevitable and that they could make them their reality
and so I lent into the fear and I I transmuted it to feed the yearning and to
ignite the burning and to become the person that I was here to be.
And that's the life of a visionary, right? And this is what I'm so passionate about.
(04:08):
Empowering others to do, to lean into that fear, to transmute it as your fuel
and to project you into the life that you're truly here to live.
That hit me really, really hard, especially as someone who, you know,
did, I came from a very abusive childhood and I've always felt that if I didn't
(04:31):
get noticed, then I wouldn't have to go through the abuse.
So I made myself unnoticeable. I made myself invisible for so long.
And a lot of us in the arts, we are scared to kind of show up.
What are some of the ways that we can kind of slowly step out?
(04:51):
Because I know If you suddenly, speaking in front of millions of people,
it might be a little nerve wracking, but can you talk about some of the ways
we can slowly get out of that invisible mindset? Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, there's so much kind of unpacking to be done, right?
But it all starts with your, well, there's three points that I really want to touch on.
(05:12):
So your big why, your purpose, and then transmuting the fear.
So I'll start with the big why.
So no matter what industry you're in, no matter what your gifts are,
what you're here to do in the world, right?
It doesn't matter your channel of how you do it, whether it's writing,
whether it's painting, whether it's talking, whatever it is,
(05:33):
I believe everyone is here for a reason.
Everyone is here to fulfill a certain purpose.
Now, your why, that purpose has to be so full body, powerful,
all encompassing, all overwhelming because
(05:55):
if that why is not
big enough it will not be able to combat the imposter
syndrome it will not be able to combat the fear of failure it won't be able
to combat the fear of rejection the fear of criticism all of these obstacles
that you will inevitably get as you grow as you expand as you put yourself out
there so your why needs to be your anchor it needs to be be your North Star, your compass.
(06:21):
It needs to be the reason behind every single thing that you do.
And it needs to be so important to every essence of your being.
That you are willing to get uncomfortable, that you're willing to put yourself
out there, to have stones thrown at you, because inevitably you will not be
(06:42):
for everyone. No one is for everyone.
And you will only achieve a level of success that you are able to allow the
level of criticism and the level of failure, because no one is an overnight success.
There are many, many, many failures in the background. I've failed more times
than most people have even tried.
And that's why I'm successful because I get up and I go again.
(07:06):
And I know that my purpose is so important that nothing will knock me down for good.
I will always keep trying because it's my magnet. It's my pull.
It's why my soul came to this world.
So the first thing to get really really clear on is your why.
Not the big house, not the status, not the car.
(07:30):
Those are all great. And I am an advocate of abundance and wealth.
And if you want nice things, go for it. I love that. Female empowerment wealth, hell yes.
But that is not a big enough why to overcome the hurdles, to overcome the obstacles.
So what is the why for your soul?
So I'll give you an example. For me, it is to
(07:51):
empower as many women as I possibly
can in my life to stop making do
to stop settling to stop
sacrificing their dreams for the life that they have and to start playing big
to start following what they truly know inside that they're here for because
(08:14):
when you know that you're here for something bigger, better, brighter.
You know, you can't explain it to anyone. You just know.
And those are the people that I'm passionate about making sure you don't give
that, put that to waste, right?
Don't waste it because your soul is here to fulfill it.
So that's my first, my first step.
(08:37):
Yeah, I completely agree with purpose being the biggest driver and that's what's helped me.
But I know that a lot of the people who I've talked with in my community,
especially in my art group, have told me that they feel stuck because they don't
know their why. and haven't been able to figure out.
So they feel that they don't deserve to step out and show their work.
(09:01):
And I was wondering if you could talk a little bit about how we can discover
our why, especially for those of us who have been in survival mode for so long.
You know, we're just all about surviving. We don't think about why as much.
Yeah, I love that. And that's really, really really important
and I was that person right I didn't know my why
(09:22):
and that's part of the reason why it took me 10 years to
start my first business because I didn't know what I was
meant to do I was like what if I get this wrong
you know what if this is not the right thing and I
knew that I was meant to be something
to be someone but I didn't know what I would you know what
that looked like what I was meant to do and so what happens
(09:42):
is we kind of end up using that as an excuse
to not take any action because it's just that fear of
getting it wrong and the fact of the matter is
is if you don't know your why now the path will
be shown as you take action as you
move forwards but it's very hard to know your why
if you're sitting around wondering what it is and
(10:04):
the clearest way that you will get that is to
start moving make a move do
something something and it will either feel good
or it won't and if it doesn't then
look to a different avenue look to a different
path look to what lights you up i would say your why is within
you right it's not something that you need to create
(10:26):
it's something that is within you already you just.
Need to really connect with yourself with
your intuition with your soul with your you know
know whatever you want to call it your spirit connect with that
divine energy source within us all and
feel into it like I
always knew when I was at school I
(10:48):
was always told that the one
thing I was the most passionate about was the
thing that I should be the most worried about it was the thing
that would hinder me the most it was the thing that would hold me back the most and that
was was talking always a talker always talking
right in lessons in detention like all the time talk and obviously at school
(11:10):
that's not what the teachers wanted but I had it drilled into me that my gift.
Was something that was not a gift it was something that was a hindrance it was something that would,
like block my journey and so
when you're looking at what is my why think back
to your childhood think back to what
(11:33):
was it that I was always really passionate about or good at if you knew that
you were good at the time I didn't know I was good at talking I just knew I
loved it and that will give you clues you know the universe leaves you clues
everywhere and then look at your hurdles look at at your mountains.
So your why can change over time.
(11:56):
So for me, my why before I was in an abusive relationship has always been about
empowering women, but it was in a very different way when I was in an abusive
relationship, obviously, because I was not empowered myself.
So I was just doing what I could at the time with who I was at the time.
Now, my why is in a much bigger bigger scale because I am a different version of me. I have healed.
(12:24):
I've overcome my mountains. That's not to say there won't be more,
but that particular mountain I've overcome and I can now stand on the other
side and I can help others navigate that. So think about your mountains.
Think about your hurdles and think about your natural gifts.
If you've always been good at writing, then your why is to share your message
(12:46):
with the world through your writing.
If it's you know art and that's
something I actually used to be really good at art when
I was a kid which wasn't a passion for me but
if that's something that you're passionate about and something
that lights up your whole body that's what you're meant to do if you desire
to do something it's because you're meant for it you're meant to follow that
(13:11):
path what lights you up that's such a good point that it doesn't always have
to be this, I'm going to change the world or whatever.
It could just be sharing something that you love to do.
And what are some of the things that, I know you like talking,
but what are some of the other things that you love to do that have helped you?
(13:35):
Because I know you have several successful businesses and
I would love to hear about some of the things
you love to do that you've implemented implemented in creating
those businesses so for me
it's about connecting with your core values okay so my
core values are fun freedom and fulfillment they
are free non-negotiables for
(13:57):
me so no matter what I do in any industry in any business in in even in my personal
life if it doesn't give me fun freedom or fulfillment I'm out it's like it's
just a no because I no no longer subscribe to doing things that people tell
me I have to do or that I should do or that I'm meant to do.
I get to choose what I do.
(14:18):
Whether I want to do it. It's up to me, just as it's up to you.
You don't have to do anything.
You are the CEO of your life. No matter what you do, no matter what your role
is, you are the CEO of your life. You get to hire and fire.
You get to write your story, what it's going to look like. You get to dictate
(14:38):
how the journey goes, ultimately.
And we can give our power away to so so many things to so many people,
to our circumstances, to our ecology, to our upbringing, to this, that, the other.
But ultimately, it's all down to us.
So fun, freedom, and fulfillment are my core values. So the first thing I would
say is figure out your core values. What are they?
(15:00):
And integrate those into everything that you do.
Because I have three businesses at the moment. I'm birthing a fourth and potentially a fifth as well.
So I'm a multi-passionate, right?
I have lots of different interests, but they all come under empowerment and
they all provide fun, freedom and fulfillment. So I have a corporate business.
(15:24):
I delegate in it. I stay in my 5% area of genius, which is communication.
Relationship building, being the brand, being the vision.
The rest, I delegate to the team because I learn how to trust and let go.
That business gives me fun, freedom, and fulfillment, gives me fun to do whatever
I want to do in my personal life, gives me the freedom to do that.
(15:47):
And it fulfills me knowing that I'm helping not only my team, but my clients.
I have a crystal business. So we sell ethically sourced crystals,
which we're now looking to scale on a quantum level,
something I've never ever done before like we're talking this is
me out of my comfort zone right but I
love crystals they helped me heal from my
(16:09):
abusive relationship they helped me manifest my first six figures
in my first business they helped me do so many things and
we're not talking about crystals but they they helped me so much I'm
so passionate about them that business gives
me fun freedom and fulfillment and what
I love about that business is my eldest daughter now runs it so
it's like I get to now watch her step into
(16:30):
her light and step into her power and really
embrace who she wants to be and well she's
17 right the amount of criticism I
got for her not being in college or going to uni because she wanted to be an
entrepreneur to follow her mum who am I to say no you know look at me I left
school at 16 but I get I get to
(16:54):
watch my daughter do that and that's something that I'm so, so proud of.
And then obviously my third business, which is Phoenix, which encompasses a lot of things.
So coaching, online courses, speaking.
And also we're building retreats for next year. So all about female empowerment, okay?
All about empowering female entrepreneurs to step into their light,
(17:18):
embrace their gifts, embrace their spirituality, embrace their divine feminine,
embrace who they're here to be and become that visionary.
So the three main things there are your core values. What are they?
And then look at anything that you wanna do or that you are doing already does
(17:39):
it give you those three if not it's time to reassess yeah and i'm gonna have
to pick your brain about crystals after because i.
Love need some crystals what are
some what are your social do you
have them on social media or where could we find you yeah
we have um yeah i can
(17:59):
give you the links after but we have the the website is full moon crystals
instagram is full dot moon dot
crystals 21 just like all we could have um but yeah
i can give you the links to those after perfect i will put those in because
i will nerd i could just talk like for hours yeah yeah i'm i'm planning on doing
(18:23):
a full episode about crystals and creativity so So we'll have to reconnect.
And I love what you said about being the CEO of your own life,
because that's something that I tell myself a lot.
And I think about some of these successful CEOs during the pandemic and how
they were able to adapt when things went awry.
(18:48):
What are some of the ways that you've been able to use adapting in order to
succeed in your passions and career?
I think adapting is an interesting word
and I think for me I've never
really classed myself as a an innovator okay
so I when I remember being like a teenager and
(19:09):
always saying out loud you know I'm not
an innovator like I can't I'm not gonna think of
like creating a camera right I'm not gonna think of
creating like a telly like I'm not one of those like inventors and
so I think we we can get caught up in
that thought process of we have to reinvent the
(19:30):
wheel and we don't have to reinvent the wheel
because the fact of the matter is is that you are here
to help certain people i'm here
to help certain people you're here to help certain people everyone listening
is here to help certain people in my opinion and so you can be doing exactly
the same as what someone you know beside you is doing but you will attract different
(19:52):
people because you have your you your own unique frequency,
your own unique gifts, your own unique story. You could be doing it.
You know, it's the whole reason of why two people can go and watch a film together
and they come out, one loved it, one hated it, because everyone has their own different realities.
Everyone has their own different perceptions, their own, based on their own journeys, right?
(20:13):
So in regards to adaption, I don't think you need to be, in my opinion,
I don't think you need to be too kind of worried about that,
I think just stay true to what you're here to do.
You don't have to know every step of the way. The way will be shown.
You just have to move. You just have to see the next step.
(20:35):
Because if you're always moving towards the next step, the rest of them will reveal themselves.
So for me, I have a North Star. I have my next step.
And the rest I release to the universe. verse and I
trust that it will be given to me once I'm ready for
that next level so in regards to adaption yeah I
think I'm a little bit on the fence about that word and I think just
(20:56):
focus on you don't worry about what anyone else is
doing stay in your lane focus on your north star focus on your purpose focus
on your big why and the path will be shown your job is to take aligned action
to move you closer to that north star that's it don't worry about the rest yeah
the reason I asked about kind of adoption,
(21:18):
being adaptable is because earlier you were talking about core values and how important it is.
And I know right now, there are a lot of genres and communities and platforms
and such that are being canceled.
I was on I was very successful on a platform that ended up going against my core beliefs.
(21:41):
And I had to think about, again, reassess what are my values. And.
It was hard. It felt like I was grieving something when it didn't work out.
So I want to talk about kind of failures and how
you deal with these situations where you end
(22:04):
up having these setbacks and how you kind
of get through that and don't let it affect your vision
and go back into that small person that you
used to be yeah so yeah so
so important a topic because failure is part of success right no one achieves
(22:25):
success without failing and if you're not willing to fail then you're not willing
to achieve success because you can't you can't have one without It's the law of duality, right?
They just don't exist on their own singularly.
So what you were talking about there.
It resonates with me a lot. And I'll just give you an example.
So for me, I pivoted my Instagram handle, my main Instagram handle earlier this
(22:50):
year. Okay, so it used to be for my crystal business.
And then when I birthed Phoenix, for whatever reason, whatever divine reason
be unknown to me, I decided to use that same account and to just,
you know, change my messaging on it.
Now, obviously, with algorithms, it doesn't always like change.
And so I went from 10k followers down
to seven and I would get
(23:14):
stuck like my views went from
thousands to like lucky if I hit 10 right we're
talking like drastic change and for
quite a while I did get sucked into that mindset of
I would wake up in the morning I would look
at my phone my nervous system would
be completely shot it was was
(23:35):
like that fight or flight right it was like everyone hates me
and I would wake up with the
feeling how many people have left me today and I
would look at my followers and sometimes I would
cry and I would it would make me relive all
of those feelings of rejection of not being good
enough why don't people like me you know I'm
(23:56):
just trying to help people why don't they want me you know all
of this like healing wound stuff it brought back
up to me and that hit me for a
good a couple months because I'm human okay we're all human and
we all have triggers we all have traumas
and we're never healed we're just healing we're just doing the best that we
(24:18):
can as we heal no one's ever fully healed and she doesn't exist and so I finally
realized that Claire hang on a minute it.
You've built two six-figure businesses outside of Instagram.
This is not the end of the world.
You know how to grow a business. You know how you can help people.
(24:43):
You know how you can reach people.
These are just not your people. And it took that mindset shift to really kick me out of that.
And And I actively went into my followers and deleted people.
Didn't know them. Just if I, I swear to God, I would just scroll.
(25:05):
And if I just landed on something, I wouldn't even look at their profile. If I just...
Didn't resonate, I just deleted them. Because I needed to take back that control.
Because it wasn't people leaving me. It was me making space for my right people.
And we have to sometimes release in order to allow, right?
(25:26):
We have to release maybe people that are no longer meant for us,
maybe people that are holding us back,
maybe clients that are not aligned with us,
you know opportunities that don't resonate with us all of this stuff sometimes
we have to release that in order to move forwards and so it's the mindset shift
of what you can deem as a failure in the first instance or rejection or you
(25:52):
know all of these narratives.
What am i being taught here what is the lesson here and for me it was about
release because i I was always the control freak, right?
I was always like, I need to control everything.
And it was in that surrender that came my serenity. It was in that surrender that came my...
(26:16):
Sense of safety that came my ease of mind
didn't impact my income because I was already
making the income my income has never
come from my followers that was not even
part of the thing it was just like
the sense that it gave me of being
a failure of for whatever reason being
(26:37):
rejected and so when these things
happen it's looking for the lesson what is the
lesson that I need to learn here because that is what
you need to know to get to the next stage of you
you can't become who you want to be until
you learn this lesson and every failure that
you have i mean i don't even believe in the word failure the only failure
(26:58):
is not to try right because then you never even know but the
only failure that we deem is that because of whatever outcome we've placed on
it that we desire that's all that it is it either matches that or it doesn't
so whatever we deem is that failure failure what is the lesson what is the lesson
in this failure because when you learn that,
(27:19):
that's when the next opportunity will show up that's when the healing will take
place that's when you will start to become the next version of you because the
person that you want to be.
Like you're here and they're here and you
have to bridge that gap and the only way to bridge
that gap is by slowly embodying different
(27:42):
layers of their identity and that
means learning things that they know that means overcoming things that they've
overcome that means having different perceptions that they've learned through
all of the failures that you need to go through that gave me goosebumps to think
about I now I think about all my failures in the past and how much I learned from them so I love that.
(28:04):
And I know we only have about 10 minutes left before you need to get going.
But I had just two quick questions.
One is how for those who are starting to see success and feeling plateaued, though,
what are some ways that they can push themselves to get out of that plateau
(28:27):
mode and continue to grow?
So plateau is a form of self-sabotage,
it's that uncertainty right of i don't really know what i want to do next so i'll do nothing at all,
you know i'm just going to stay where i am until i feel more ready
or until i have more more certainty and the fact is that never happens
it's it's a form of self-sabotage of your subconscious keeping you exactly where
(28:49):
you are because this is your new safety zone this is your new comfort zone and
so to get out of that plateau we have to stretch that comfort zone right so
i like to think of it as like a bubble like your paradigm is your bubble that
you are in and if If you're plateaued,
this is your subconscious saying,
I want to stay in this bubble. I don't want to move anywhere.
And so what we have to do is just slowly stretch that.
(29:12):
Because if you try and just break it, it just rebuilds and brings you right back in.
You can't do that. You just have to stretch it until a new bubble has formed.
And so the way that we do that is by, again, looking at the next step.
What is one thing, one thing that you can do today to take you closer to your North Star?
(29:33):
To take you close to you. It doesn't have to be a big thing.
But one thing that you've been putting off, one thing that you know you want
to do, that you're meant to do, because the thing that scares you the most is
the thing that is meant for you the most, right?
Fear is the same as excitement in our body. It knows no difference.
It's only your breath. And so what you need to do is really really
lean into that fear and use it
(29:54):
as your fuel because that is the it's the roadblock it's the it's the wall between
you and where you want to be and the only way you get to where you want to be
is by jumping over that wall or smashing through it so just start to take away the bricks,
(30:14):
start to take away the bricks one at a time. And that is by doing one thing
at a time, one step at a time.
Don't think about, you know, the gap between where I am now and where I want
to be is like a million pounds.
Think about, okay, maybe how can I, I don't know, make an extra 10k next month?
How can I get in front of 10 more people next week?
(30:37):
You know, wherever you're at, whatever you're doing what is
a smaller goal that you can start
to now move towards because it's
the compound effect right it's the incremental steps
from now to where you
want to be that's how you get there and that's
(30:58):
when you wake up suddenly and you're
like I've quantum leaped my whole world has changed when
the real facts of the matter is you've been working on this for the last five
years it's just like you suddenly wake up and you're like everything has changed
yeah it feels like everything has changed but actually you've been making those
changes incrementally for the last however long since you started consciously
(31:19):
being aware of it right so.
Yeah to get out of that plateau just stretch
the bubble just take away one brick
at a time by looking at your next tangible
real i don't like the word realistic but your next
it's also about a word that we can use like achievable
goal don't make it unachievable because sometimes
(31:41):
your subconscious will just reject it because it just seems too far away so
what is your next achievable goal that you can work towards and focus on that
because then you'll have less cognitive dissonance you're less likely to self-sabotage
it and you're less likely to kind kind of get in your own way.
That actually also kind of answers my last question I wanted to ask,
(32:04):
but it kind of goes along with it.
I know a lot of people do understand that they need to take that step out of
their comfort zone, but they don't know how to.
Do you have any resources or tips
on how we can get help in
that process of getting over this
(32:26):
this fear of stepping out of our comfort zone and
also any last thoughts before we end yeah definitely
um and actually perfect timing because i literally just this morning
finished making it so i had
now have a real low ticket offer is 33 pounds as
an introductory price to learn how
to to actually transmute your fear so learn the science
(32:48):
behind it become aware of how it shows up and then
there's some tangible actionable tools that you can start implementing
into your life into your business right now to get
it out of the way right to smash through that brick wall to
start moving those bricks to start using it as
your fuel to propel you into the future that you want
so i can give you the link for that yes 33 pound
(33:09):
it's valued at 250 and it's lifetime access you
get it it for forever and it's it's one of those things that you don't know
you need it until you until you do the work and then you're like oh my god so
I would love to um yeah to share that with everyone and I think just a last
message that I would love to share would just be to believe in yourself.
(33:30):
To believe that your dreams were given to you for a reason because you are the
only person person that is able to live them, that is able to materialize them,
that is able to fulfill them.
That is why they don't make sense to anyone else, because they're only meant for you.
So don't take advice from anyone who is not living the life that you want,
(33:51):
because they haven't been where you need to get to.
They don't have the tools, they don't have the experience, they haven't been
on that journey to offer you any kind of sound advice that is going to be helpful to you.
So put your earplugs in to anyone that is not on that journey and already living
that life and follow your dreams, follow your North Star and believe it is all
(34:12):
possible because whatever you believe is what will be true to you.
I love that statement. Whatever you believe will be true to you.
And if you don't believe in yourself, how could you expect others to believe in you too?
So that was really powerful for me. I personally needed to hear everything that you said today.
(34:32):
So I am extremely grateful that you were able to meet.
And of course, thank you to everyone who tuned into this week's episode of the
success palette about finding our why as creatives for social links and additional bonus episodes.
Go to the success palette dot com. Thank you and make it a successful week.
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