The notion that I can quit

content: Sep 19, 2018 · podcast: Oct 20, 2021

Audio (MP3): 20180919 - The notion that I can quit

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My favorite Freakonomomics^[1] podcast is from a few years back. It’s beautifying titled, The Upside of Quitting.

It’s also the only podcast I’ve listened to more than twice. The episode is one of those things that changed everything. It’s become part of my spiritual condition. The notion that I can quit has become part of who I am.

We’re all familiar with the dogmatic mantra:

Winners never quit.

That’s all fine and good if we play football but not if we’re dying inside because our life is horrible.

Let me give you three examples:

1. If we’re in a relationship where we feel suffocated or maybe where we feel lonely, we need to quit. Get out of it. Things aren’t going to change or get any better just because we’re sad.
2. If we go to a job every morning and feel miserable, we need to quit. Desperately pleading to the almighty or flat out ignoring the crisis won’t make our misery stop. It’ll be on our minds tomorrow. Before we even get to work.
3. If mowing our yard is simply dreadful, we need to quit cutting the grass and get somebody else to do it. Spending a Saturday with yardwork nagging at our soul will only end up ruining our whole weekend.

Suffering isn’t a badge of honor or something to be proud of. It’s bullshit. And we won’t sleep any better until we quit believing that anything but first place will do.

There’s something to be said for loyalty and persistence for sure but quitting when the situation demands it is something that’s often overlooked or ignored altogether. Sometimes it’s easier to just stay stuck than revolt. But staying stuck is not something we’ll ever want to tell our grandkids about. Wouldn’t it be grand to tell them the story of the great revolution that made the world magical again?

Quitting is decisive and final.

It’s not fruity, metaphysical, or abstract. It’s concrete and effective. We feel release when we quit. All the hurt will stop.

Sometimes it takes time to quit, especially when we’re in the middle of something big or entangled in something painful. When I quit drinking it took months.^[2] Getting ready and absolutely wanting to quit was most of the battle.

The road we walk is ours. Our future is up to us and not our partner, not our boss, and not the dandelions. We don't have to be along for just their ride.

And we have to firmly believe that we deserve nice things as well. I’m telling you now that you do. The moon and the stars are all hanging in the sky just for you.

Quit. What it that's making you unhappy. Quit.

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