18: How To Overcome People Pleasing

Episode Overview:

In this episode I am talking people pleasing, which is a behavior pattern in which you constantly seek to please others, at the expense of your own needs and desires. In this episode I break down what this can look like, how it can negatively impact you and your relationships, and I provide you with some specific information to help you move from being a "people pleaser" to becoming a "recovering people pleaser".

What I Cover:

• Review of common people pleasing behaviors / characteristics so you can identify which ones may apply to you.

• Information about why people pleasing is not positive for relationships and how it can be harmful to both you and the other person.

• 6 action steps to help you move away from people pleasing behaviors.

Let's Take Some Action:

• #1: Buy yourself time before saying yes. Instead of saying “yes” automatically, pause and say something like, “I would love to help but let me check on a few things first and I will get back to you by _____ (and give a reasonable time frame). 

• #2: Say no without feeling like you need to give a big explanation. Try saying something like, “I am not able to help out with that, but I hope it all goes well”.

• #3: Try expressing your opinion about something you normally would not.

• #4: Share your emotions with someone instead of pretending you are fine. 

• #5: Every day, write down 1 positive thing about yourself, or write down 1 positive thing you did. Start to build your inner self-confidence, rather than needing to rely on others to do this for you. 

• #6: Take inventory of your relationships. Go to the end of the episode where I walk you through a process for doing this.

Useful Resources:

Do you worry too much, overthink, assume the worst-case scenarios, spend a lot of time focusing on negative things that have happened, or discredit positive things happening? If so, you are dealing with the human brain we have all been given and you are not alone.

The good news is, you can change this and it may not take as long as you may think! If you want a free resource that will help you examine your thinking patterns, and change those that are not serving you, grab my 5 Common Thought Distortions Guide HERE.

Let’s stay in touch:

Website: www.KarenVincentSolutions.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karenvincentsolutions/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KarenVincentSolutions

Twitter: https://twitter.com/KarenVCoach