#36 Felicity Azura | An eye opening glimpse into the life of a professional cuddler and sex worker - Bang Two Three Podcast

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
I'm actually an ass guy and I'm like a big ass guy,

(00:02):
Oh, really?
I'm like, give me all of the ass.
Like, give me the Tonka truck and back it up on me.
Beep beep, because I'm ready to hop in.
Where were you traveling yesterday?
- So I live in the East Bay part of the San Francisco Bay Area
and I have a younger sibling who lives in Orange County,

(00:25):
which is in Southern California and it's
Southern California is so vast.
Like, technically the Bay Area is too,
but just to get from like, I don't know,
15 miles away, that can take an hour driving
and it's like my so-called geography is pretty bad.

(00:46):
And so my mom and I, we flew down on Friday
to visit my sibling for the weekend.
- Are you like team Solcal or team Norcal?
This is where I've lived for my entire life.
I've never been out of Norcal for more than two weeks.

(01:06):
But that's actually gonna change soon because
I got a bunch of job offers in Guam and now I'm like,
well, if one of those doesn't work out,
then I'll just go to many other businesses
that ask me to work for them.
Oh yeah, I have a Guam bug.
- Oh my gosh.
Why did you apply to a job in Guam?

(01:29):
- I have a mother-in-law who lives there.
And so my boyfriend's mom, she's very sweet.
And honestly, I understand my parents do a lot for me,
but my parents and I have been putting head in my older sister
is getting married within like one month.
And so that's making me and the other sibling,

(01:52):
the one who's not getting married.
(laughs)
All the other siblings are so stressed out about
my older sister's wedding and then these extended relatives
cannot make it and it's like,
how come you won't go to my sister's wedding?
And it's like, 'cause I already have vacation plans
at that time and I'm like, you can't vacation
any other time of year, but then they'll be like,

(02:12):
well, I work a salary job, like a paycheck job.
So there's only so much like paid time off.
You know?
I'm like, okay, half-fun in Korea is.
(laughs)
Not like you don't go every single year.
Anyways.
- Would you really let like a family tip

(02:33):
kind of like drive you to Guam?
- Okay, it's just my mother's or my boyfriend's mom,
she lives all by herself.
She's been living by herself for like over 10 years.
And like all, not all, but a majority of her friends
and family live all the way here,
or I don't know if you're near by me,

(02:54):
all the way in North America.
So she's like, she needs company, man.
- So he's the one then?
- He's the one.
- Fuck, are you just saying?
- And it's like so few jobs will provide you with housing
as well.

(03:15):
And I live in San Francisco.
Rent is so expensive.
- It's crazy.
- It's crazy expensive.
So I'm like, this, all of these jobs,
they're like offering me housing.
Only have to pay like $400 a month for utilities.
I'm like, I can afford that.
And my mother-in-law is going to be like a mile away from me.

(03:35):
So she can help me with groceries and stuff
'cause she owns a car and I think it would be nice
to spend some time away from, you know,
the place where I was born, even though I love where I was born.
What is there to get away from?
Everyone, usually living one of the coolest cities out there.

(03:56):
- San Francisco is really cool, but it's just family is,
I think we all have like very strong personalities.
And, you know, a lot of us are,
it's my way or the highway kind of people.
- Are you like that and beyond us?
- Yes, I am.
(laughing)

(04:17):
- So when you can go with him?
- Yeah, I was about to say, when you and your boyfriend,
like get in a, where are we eating tonight?
You always win.
- Well, I normally, it's like cooking at home
and eating out or both, like, they're both,

(04:40):
they're own gigantic things because when we eat at home,
it's like me cooking for myself and then him just cooking for himself
'cause we both have very particular tastes.
And then when we go out to eat,
it's just, it's normally me asking him,

(05:03):
where are you in the mood for?
And he's like, I'll just do whatever you go with.
And I'm like, okay, I'll go with this.
And he's like, no, actually, no.
So it pretty much every person I dated prior,
it was a lot easy making food plans with them.
And then with my Chamorro boyfriend, it's,
- Your wife boyfriend?
- But you said that again.

(05:24):
- Oh, my boyfriend, since he's indigenous to Guam,
he's Chamorro.
- Oh.
- So I really don't think any of my ex-boyfriends
were this particular with what they ate.
And it is what it is.
And I am truly grateful that I've met him.

(05:48):
- Well, okay, well, because all you said
is that it's really hard eating with this guy.
He's having me move across the world.
Like, what is so good about it?
Like, what's the good thing?
Is he just the most beautiful man in all of San Francisco?
- No.
(laughing)
- Okay, well, I think he has a really good head

(06:12):
on his shoulders.
And I don't mean that in a neurotypical sense.
I mean, that when I'm frustrated with my family,
I go to him and I'm like, oh my God, I have to wake up
at like 6 a.m. the day of my sister's wedding.
And then we literally have the wedding
until 11 p.m. that night.
It's gonna be, like, I'm gonna have to be awake

(06:33):
for 15 hours.
And like, I'm already cranky about that.
And he's like, just, just go to sleep early the night before
pack yourself some snacks.
See, throughout the day.
And so you'll survive.
And it's only gonna be like one day of your entire life.
And I'm like, you don't know if this is going to be

(06:54):
the only wedding my sister has in her entire life.
Like, she had her mini wedding in October of 2020
just for immediate family.
And then this one is like the big one
where all the extended families being invited.
So I'm like, I don't know, she might throw another one
in like, in like 20, 27.

(07:15):
And it's like all the extended families who didn't make it
to the one in 2024 are invited.
Like, I don't know.
I don't know if she wants to do this like every four years.
- So what is like, what is your biggest trepidation
or issue with moving to Guam?
'Cause I've also like, thought about this.
Kind of for the same reasons.
It's like these other countries, I think,

(07:36):
I don't know, I'm from America born and raised.
And like, we're kind of brainwashed
where it's like, listen, everywhere else sucks.
America is it, but then you kind of see like,
hey, there's some really cool places outside of America.
Oh, and by the way, they pay like 300 bucks a month for rent.
And this type of stuff, the food is cheap and stuff like that.
I was like, huh.
So what are you like most scared of if you were to move?

(07:59):
- That honestly, that my parents are just going to,
throw a toddler tantrum because, I mean,
I knew I wanted to be a stripper when I was like 19, 20 years old.
My first stripper bydition was when I was 20.

(08:22):
I do not get the job, but honestly,
I got hired when I was 22 in San Francisco
and I've worked at like five stripper club scents
and like the money is not good right now in North America.
So I'm like, how about I just go to Micronesia
then maybe the money is better there.

(08:43):
And I, you know, I love my mother-in-law and she loves me.
So I'm not going to be completely isolated once I'm there.
And you know, my boyfriend grew up on Guam.
So if I have questions, like, oh, should I use this taxi service

(09:06):
or this taxi service, he can be like,
"Oh, that one is cheaper, but that one,
they take like two hours just to pick you up."
So maybe not that one.
And so I'm not going in this completely blind,
like yesterday, I spoke to my boyfriend about whether I should get
like a traditional bank account on Guam or use a credit union

(09:27):
and he's like, as great as credit unions are,
I think it would be better if you use one
of the more traditional bank accounts on Guam and like, cool.
And so I'm not like throwing a dart on a map and just going,
"Okay, I guess I'm going to go there for three months."
I actually have like connections who,
that, and they'll help me.
Yeah, so it sounds like you don't really have any.

(09:49):
I ask you what the fears were and you were like,
these are all the things that's awesome.
Well, it's just my like blood relatives,
because, you know, my older sister,
she's lived on the other side of the United States
and on the other side of the Pacific Ocean, so Japan.
For several years at a time, my younger sibling,
they've been living in Southern California for over a year now.

(10:13):
So both my siblings, they're, like my parents are already accustomed
to only seeing them on special occasions,
especially when my older sister was living in Japan.
And so I never really had that experience of, you know,
going to a college that's like four time zones away
or a seven hour drive away.

(10:34):
And it's like, sometimes you have to move out of your parents' house
or just not talk to your parents for quite some time for them
to realize how much they're taking you for granted.
I don't know if you have siblings,
so I don't know if you can relate to that,
but I'm like, I think I'm the child that gets taken

(10:55):
for granted in the most.
Oh my gosh, your other siblings may say that too.
Do you think that you--
They probably do.
Yeah, do you think that like this whole tiff
that you have is based on you becoming a stripper?
Is that like the--
Oh, they--
The work at the bottom?
My parents are not happy with me doing sex work.
And I came out to them two years ago.

(11:17):
It's been two years since I came out as a sex worker.
And both my older sister and younger sibling,
they went to prestigious colleges.
And my older sister got two degrees within four years.
My younger sibling only has one degree,
but it's an engineering degree.

(11:37):
And so they have like a job that pays over 50 grand
within the first year of hiring.
And I'm like, man, I never made close to 50k within a year,
not even within a year, within two years.
Like, I am not.
And so I'm not--

(11:57):
Why would you tell them?
At the same place.
Like, what compel-- you knew it wasn't going to be good.
Why would you tell them?
I mean, they actually came to me and were like, are you?
And so I would say I'm a person of many things,
but I don't lie.
Even if it's to somebody whom I'm not always on good terms with,

(12:21):
like I don't want to lie to my parents.
And it was like ripping up and day off.
And then my boyfriend and I, we hugged after the very awkward phone
call with my mom.
And he's still there for me to hug me and console me whenever
my mom is giving me a hard time.

(12:42):
I mean, the other day, my mother was
hounding my younger sibling.
Like, why aren't you giving me grandkids?
And then a part of me was like, she
doesn't hound me for grandkids.
She mainly hounds me to finish college.
I dropped out over a year ago.
And so I'm like, am I like too dumb in my mom's eyes,

(13:06):
where it's like, I don't want that child passing on her genes,
because she's not-- she's like the only child of mine who
didn't go to college and finish within four years.
So a part of-- like, I don't want kids.
But a part of me is thinking, do I have the worst genes
and I'm not the one or I'm the one least deserving of?

(13:30):
I don't know, passing on fucking genetics.
Like, it kind of sucks for all the siblings.
Yeah, does it feel like that your parents love
is tied to which career you pick?
Yeah.
And it's like--
Is that the reason?
I understand that there's a lot of discrimination

(13:51):
against sex workers.
And so it's going to make it hard to apply for apartments
or for a mortgage, a car, da, da, da, da, da,
and when I was 18, I was like, I accept that these are the turns
and conditions that come with this job.
And it has made me so resourceful.

(14:14):
I don't really understand the sex workers
who literally just do one job.
Like, only do pro-domin, or only do custom videos.
Because I've always done a plethora of different things
within the adult industry.
So for example, if stripping isn't that well,
I'm like, that's cool, because I can fucking kill it

(14:38):
as a phone sex operator.
And that's what I've been doing.
I haven't strived since October.
But honestly, I've been killing it
when it comes to selling used underwear.
And--
[LAUGHS]
--consexual.
Oh, man, this is awesome.
This is awesome.
Like, this morning, I got a very disturbing message
from somebody buying a fetish item for me.
And I'm like, this is so disturbing.

(14:59):
I don't even know if I should tell my boyfriend about this,
because it's like that perturbing.
And I love the guy.
What's the message?
Oh, gosh.
It's like-- so one of the fetish items I sell
is the files of urine.
And this person, instead of buying it--
because it's like, ooh, this is sexy, and this turns me on--
he gave me the most deranged reason I've ever

(15:21):
heard for wanting to buy my own fluids.
Like--
Yeah.
--he was super adamant.
Like, I need this by tomorrow.
Like, I need this fat.
I need this ASAP.
And I'm like, OK, thank you for the money.
And thank you for the tip, because he sent me a $10 tip.
And I was like, out of curiosity, why do you
need this so urgently?

(15:41):
And he said--
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
He said, I need this for a homemade drug test.
And I'm like, first of all, why are you
trying to make your own drug test from scratch, man?
And he's like, OK, I think my kids are starting to smoke weed.

(16:04):
And I want to have--
I want to have a urine sample from someone who doesn't smoke,
so I can test the validity.
And I'm like, what the hell is going on?
If your kids, if your minors are smoking,
then traumatizing them, by forcing them
to pee in front of you on a stick,

(16:26):
that may or not give accurate results,
because you like Frankenstein something in your basement,
that's not going to improve your relationship with your kid.
But as a fetish seller, it is not my job
to be somebody's family therapist.
But I also kind of feel bad for the kids,
because it's like, yeah, I don't want kids to do drugs,

(16:49):
but this is not how you disincentivize them.
So traumatizing them is only going
to make them want to do drugs more.
Of course, yes.
Yeah, so I'm like, this is the most deranged message
I've ever received, like, oh, God.
That is pretty crazy.
What is it like being a stripper?

(17:10):
Like, what is your least favorite and favorite things?
- Least favorite is probably the--
OK, can I say the same thing for both favorite and not favorite?
Because it's one of those jobs where one day,
you can make $5, and the next day, you
can make $1,000.

(17:31):
And so it's my favorite thing when I'm having those good nights,
but it's also my least favorite thing
when I'm having the bad nights.
And that's kind of the metaphor for life.
You take the good with the bad, but when it's bad,
it's really bad.
OK, how does that feel?
Because that's the thing.
Like, some people who work on tips

(17:52):
do come home with a little bit of money.
But what is involved in the process of stripping?
Does it feel like you're just up here dancing,
and no one gives a shit?
Or do you feel lonely?
I do like for clubs where a huge emphasis is on the stage
performance because I'm a multidisciplinary acrobat.

(18:14):
So I enjoy doing all the partwales and upside down stuff
even though it is very dangerous,
and I'm wearing super tall heels.
And I might just kick myself in the face
because the heel's her that tall.
And by some miracle, I've never received a sports injury.

(18:37):
And I've been dancing since I was like nine.
So I feel very--
it's like-- it's tiring.
It's physically tiring.
But it's also very invigorating.
And to get paid to do the thing that I love to do is wonderful.

(18:58):
And I do believe I'm someone who could have a conversation
with anyone.
And it's great because here in the Bay Area,
I get all kinds of people coming into the strip club.
I get nerdy people who are like, let's just
gush over memes for 10 minutes or 20 minutes.
I'm like, cool.

(19:19):
I have a lot of memes on my phone.
And then you got the people who are like,
you know, I don't really want to talk about myself
because I'm pretty boring.
So I just want to listen to you talk about whatever it is
that you want to talk about.
I'm like, cool.
And from what I've heard from my boyfriend,
there's very little diversity in Guam.

(19:41):
And so one of the things I am dreading
is what if every single person who walks through the door
is different versions of the same guy.
There's not enough variety to keep it--
variety is the spice of life.

(20:02):
Instead of this person's human and this person's all spice,
everyone is just like salt.
And I don't want to feel bored.
I really don't.
If it's a job, I'm doing like 35 hours a week.
I definitely don't want every single person I talk to to be boring.

(20:22):
Because the only thing-- well, not only things.
But one of the things that is worse than talking to people
who bore you but getting paid is making very little money
and having to talk to really boring people.
You know what's so interesting is I
ask you a stripper question and you just
tell me about talking, right?

(20:42):
Is every guy that go into a stripper--
because I'm thinking that guys who go in a strip club
they're like really freaking horny, right?
They're like, ooh, honestly.
What a beautiful face.
That was brilliant.
It's like, yeah, they're like, oh, yeah.
Oh, oh.
Do I see boobies?
I have money.
I want boobies.

(21:03):
But does that really just go in there?
And it's just like, yes, hey, I just want to talk to you.
They're not perverts?
I mean, yes, but the thing is, I'm not the only stripper working.
There's like 10 other people walking around in lingerie.
So to make myself stand out, I can't just look pretty.

(21:28):
I have to also be a fun person to talk to.
Because not every single person with a pretty face
is capable of having a conversation with literally anyone.
Are the other strippers just as pretty as you, or prettier?
Oh, thank you.
Thankfully, in Guam, there's like a wide variety.

(21:51):
Right.
In my own places, they'll only hire tall, skinny, blonde, white women.
Whereas I personally prefer working in clubs with different ethnicities of women and
different ages of women, just different styles.
And I think that's also smart from a business perspective.

(22:14):
So you can pull customers in from there and customers from there and customers from there.
And I know I may not be everyone's cup of tea, but you cannot argue that I'm not a good dancer.
Like, I know six different disciplines of acrobatics I can fucking put on a show.
Like, you can give me a random ass like wooden chair and I'll figure out how to do some cool shit on it.

(22:39):
Holy shit.
So have you ever had any like creepy encounters or whatever in the strip club with guys?
Oh, God.
And this didn't happen to me, but I literally was on my phone the other day, you know, googling
some of the clubs in Guam because one of them rebranded and I'm like, oh, did they have

(22:59):
like a new owner or something?
Why did they rebrand?
And I'll maybe I'll never know why, but two clubs were on the news for pretty bad reasons.
And one of them was a club that rebranded.
So I'm like, oh gosh, this is like the only thing that pops up on Google when you, it's
like, I've searched their new business name, the docs, but you know, I'm not the business owner,

(23:22):
so they'll deal with that.
But the bad news was that I think somebody was being belligerent in a parking lot and they
started like a fist fight.
And so then the police arrested them, but I think the police released them after like one
hour in custody.
So I'm like, wait, what the hell is this like a thing where in Guam people will like

(23:47):
fight each other in a parking lot and then the police will be like, okay, well, just apprehend
them, but then also release them.
Yeah.
Like maybe it was a bail thing, but I'm like, this doesn't look good.
I mean, it's better in the parking lot than in the establishment itself, but I'm like, this
doesn't look good.
No, that does not sound good.

(24:08):
Have you ever been like giving a guy maybe a lap dance or whatever and you're like, oh
my gosh, like, I am sexually attracted to it.
Like I'm physically attracted to him.
Oh gosh.
It's funny because I immediately thought of when I worked for this one, gentlemen's club
in San Francisco.

(24:29):
And a dude who was pretty much my age came in, he bought a lap dance and I don't give my
phone number out to every single person I dance for, but for him, I was like, you know,
here's my phone number.
I have a work phone number, by the way, not my personal phone number.
And so at the time, I was still a college student and I think a semester just ended.

(24:57):
And so I had a bunch of textbooks that I was like, I have no use for these anymore.
I should sell them.
But honestly, if somebody takes them off of my hands for free, that would make my day.
I just don't want these textbooks anymore.
And so my mind went to, should I contact that one dude who is my age, who my met in the

(25:22):
strip club.
There's good tips that he's in college.
Maybe he'll have some use for this.
And so I actually told the boyfriend I had at the time of this plan and he's like, that
is a terrible plan.
Like, who thinks of this?
Who thinks of this?
And so I never did that.
But he, maybe he would have taken it off of my hands, but you know, I would have said you

(25:47):
could take it off of my hands at the strip club.
And then he probably would be like, okay, meet me in front, meet me in, you know, the lobby,
exchange the books, and then he leaves.
And I'm like, no, he didn't spend money.
I say this because, I mean, I didn't fancy this underwear client, but I used to work

(26:09):
at this strip club in San Jose.
And I contacted somebody online and I was like, oh, you want, you want my panties?
Cool.
Thank you for the money.
And they're like, wait, I actually live in San Jose.
Can we just exchange in person?
And I'm like, actually, that is cool with me.

(26:30):
And so I told him to meet me in the parking lot of the strip club that I used to work for.
And then he's like, have a nice day.
And then he left and I was like, no, you were so far off then like, go into the strip club
and then spend money on me.
But oh, well, were you in like stripper attire?
Well, not in the parking lot, but it was, you know, I was trying to get him to go inside,

(26:53):
but he did it.
Damn.
Well, this is terrible news for guys.
This is because I asked you if you actually liked the guy and you said, yeah, but I just
wanted to give him a book.
Is that the thing?
Whenever we go into strip clubs, it's like, y'all cast a spell on us, man.
It's so crazy which y'all can do.
It is so, like, it is genuinely like, it's talent.

(27:16):
It's which, it's fucking, I love how he's calling talent because it is, but my mind, I'm like,
it's which.
Okay.
And see, this is it.
See, look, okay, I get to see the other side.
I'm so glad you're educating me because what happens is, is we going there and it's like,
you know, boobies, glitter, you know, sexy stuff.

(27:37):
It's like, oh, you're clearly a boob, man, because you said boobies.
I said, but I'm actually an as guy and I'm like, oh, really?
I'm like, like, give me all of the ass.
Like, give me the talk of truck and back it up on me.
Beep beep because I'm ready to hop in.
But like, yeah, you see, for me, I see booties, but like a lot of time, I've never been to

(27:58):
one where like the, the bottoms are off, like fully nude, I guess.
Oh, okay.
That's why.
I see nipples.
I'm like, wow, you know, and I see like panties is okay.
But it's how we walk in.
It's like, wow, oh my gosh.
And I have money.
I'm like, ooh, she let me put it in her G string.
She let me put the dollar in.
And it's like, oh my gosh.

(28:18):
And I'm freaking out.
And then next thing you know, like some beautiful woman who's obviously out of my league
comes to me and is like, hey, you're cute.
Do you want, you want, like, I want to do a dance for you.
You want me to let, like, do a dance?
And I'm like, holy shit, she wants to fuck me.
Oh my gosh.
She wants to so bad.
This is my moment.
She's out of my league.

(28:40):
She's covered in glitter.
Like I am in a trance right now.
Like this is crazy.
And then she does the dance and right.
She's dancing on me and stuff.
And like, you know, I'm like, she totally wants to fuck me.
Like she wants me so bad right now.
Like she will take me over a glass of water in the desert any day.
She wants me and she's doing all of this.

(29:00):
And she's like, oh my gosh, I boob's in my face.
I'm trying to grab her butt.
She's telling me no, but I'll try again because I'm a creeper.
And like all of this stuff.
But what you're saying is like, yes, she doesn't give a shit at all.
I mean, you said creeper.
My mind defaulted to Minecraft creepers.
And I don't even believe mine.
You said the news.

(29:21):
I'm a roller coaster tycoon person.
OK, I have so many hours of roller coaster tycoon on my phone.
I am in my video game era.
Like, they're so--
We got a Swiftie.
OK, we-- there are some clubs with a champagne room.

(29:42):
And so it's very exclusive and closed off.
And there are some strippers who will literally bring their switch to work.
And maybe their champagne room has a TV.
And they'll like straight up play Mario Kart with clients in the champagne room.
And I don't own a switch.
But if I did, I would absolutely do that and be like,

(30:05):
I bet you can't beat me at Mario Kart.
But a part of me is like, hmm, would it be a good business idea
if I purposefully lose to make them feel even better about themselves?
I don't know.
But then again, I don't work at a strip club at the moment.
And if I did, I don't know if they--

(30:27):
if they have TV in the champagne room.
Because when I worked at a gentleman's club in 2021,
the owner he would buy these pornographic DVDs and just put them in the champagne room.
And I mean, I didn't really talk to my coworkers there.

(30:50):
So I don't know if-- they're like, yeah, I totally sold a champagne room.
And we just watched pornographic movies together.
But I don't know.
I just have a hard time believing that somebody would go to a strip club,
pay someone like 500 bucks just to watch pornographic films.
Yeah, those cheap ones that you can find at any adult novelty store.

(31:11):
But maybe they do exist.
I'm just not that kind of gal.
Is it true that people actually have sex in the champagne room sometimes?
I mean, I hope they don't do it because--
It's nasty.
Because I don't think that the couches and the carpets and the strip clubs get cleaned
often enough.

(31:31):
Like, I've worked at one strip club where the entire stage was carpet.
And the strip club itself was beautiful.
But in my mind, I'm thinking this could be a health hazard if I'm like fully naked on this
carpeted stage and it doesn't get cleaned often enough.
And my health is important.

(31:53):
And the health insurance in the US is so expensive.
If I have options to dance at clubs with proper stages, then I should do that.
That is awesome.
I think you're actually on to something with this Mario Kart thing.
This could be your whole fucking stick.
You're about to be a billionaire.
You could go on stage as the Princess in Mario Kart?

(32:17):
Oh, I actually have some Rosalina and Princess Peach cosplay.
So, I should do that.
Do that.
And then you go flirt with a guy, hey, you want a dance or whatever?
Or no, don't even say you want a dance.
You're right.
But hey, I bet you can't beat me, Mario bitch.

(32:38):
I try not to use insults because there are some strippers with really dark humor and they'll
just go up to someone and be like, hey, what's your name?
He says something like John or Todd.
He'll just immediately go, oh, that's such a bland white name.
And I'm like, I don't try to start fights with people within 30 seconds of meeting them.

(32:59):
That's like, that's a horrible way to try to make money.
Yeah, that's not my style.
You should be a streamer.
You should be like one of the e-girl streamers.
You would make so much money, have you tried that?
No, but I am familiar with this one website called ePlay, which is, you know, like Twitch,

(33:19):
except nudity is allowed.
So I've heard that Twitch is ruling with an iron fist.
And so I really do hope that the people being banned from Twitch for being too sexy find success
on ePlay because migrating to YouTube, it doesn't seem to be any better from my outside perspective.

(33:45):
Yeah, that's a, so how do you approach like?
Like your niche, like your sex worker landscape, right?
So I'm guessing what your, like, let's just, the objective is to make the most money, I assume.
Yes, sir.
And you have a specific set of skills and talents, your acrobat and a brilliant answer, I assume.

(34:07):
So like, how do you navigate that with your skillset?
Honestly, I listen to podcasts all the time.
I don't really tell people in the club that I have a podcast, but I listen to podcasts all
the time about so many different things, like I was just listening to a food related podcast

(34:29):
because it's fun to have these little debates, like, is watermelon a drink?
Because it's in 70, no, 97% water.
And so it's, it's part of my getting ready for work ritual.
I tend to work extra clubs that are an hour drive away from my house.

(34:49):
And so I have a lot of time to just listen to podcasts.
And then I'm like, ooh, that's like a good question.
I should use that as an opener because in the club, one of my goals is, you know, besides
make money is to use a different opener for every person I talk to.

(35:12):
And you know, it's, it's fun to just go up to somebody and be like, hi, do you think watermelon
is a drink?
And then it's fun to have these little, quicky debates.
I try not to talk about things like the economy and all that doom and gloom stuff.

(35:34):
People don't want to talk about that when they're in the stroke club.
And so I just go, well, if humans are 75% water, does that make me a drink?
And then they'll probably do some kind of joke about a tall glass of water.
I'm 5'2" by the way, I'm not tall.
I am tall in my heels though.
So I guess, I guess that applies.

(35:57):
And so I, I just listen to a lot of podcasts and I watch a lot of YouTube videos and that
helps me come up with ideas with how to talk to people.
But more so like, like, for example, like strip, like, okay, you only have so many hours in
a day.
Yeah.
Like stripping versus only fans versus sexy streaming versus like selling underwear.

(36:21):
Like how do you choose which one of those is a better investment?
Ooh, that's such a good question.
And so when I was younger, I was the kind of person who was like, I will never repost
the same photo on different platforms.
Like I will have multiple platforms, but I'll never recycle content.

(36:44):
And then as I got older, I'm like, wait a second, everyone recycles content.
And it's not just like independent self-employed people.
It's from the independent contractors all the way to like mega corporations.
Everyone is kind of like using the same promo photos, regardless of if it's Instagram or Twitter.

(37:07):
And it's good to repost or recycle content because, you know, one day an entire website
goes complete and it's like, and that happened to me where it's like, oh, I'm only going to
post, you know, exclusive content on this one AVN website.

(37:27):
And then AVN went under and I'm like, no, like all those years of me making content just
to put on this platform and it's gone.
And so that I don't want to say it destroyed me because it's not like I wasn't on other
platforms.
So I still had some streams of income, but it did suck that I invested like so much into

(37:54):
the videos and the photos I put there.
And then I'm like, I'm never going to get that back.
And so I, I avoid burnout by, like, first of all, saving my files and secondly of all uploading
those files to various platforms because this is embarrassing.
But in 2020, I uploaded a bunch of photosets as dip files on this one porn site and I was

(38:23):
like, okay, well, I put it there.
So I'll just delete the file from my computer.
And so now I literally have to like create a buyer account, buy the item.
And then I'm like, okay, I have that file back on my external hard drive.
These are things that nobody told me.
This is just me learning on the job.

(38:46):
And then of course, once I downloaded, I'm like, oh, yeah, I could have, I could have made
this zip file a lot more organized and neat, but you know, I learned my lesson.
Do you think if you were extremely wealthy from doing exactly what you're doing now that
your parents would actually accept you and be very proud?

(39:08):
$20 million.
Ooh, I think so because I've heard from other Chinese strippers that it was only until after
they told their parents that they made like a grand in I or something, you know, something
astronomical.
Their parents are like, oh, okay.
And I've heard from like Puerto Rican and black strippers where they're like, oh, yeah,

(39:29):
I am the highest earner in my workplace.
They're like, okay, I approve of you.
And it's like, I shouldn't have to be the highest earner in my club.
I shouldn't have to be making at least $1,000 a night to be deserving of respect.
I just am deserving of respect because I'm a human.
Yeah, I totally agree, but it sounds like that, like I said, this is such a big tip.

(39:54):
They're like, oh, no, make money this way.
And you're like, no, I'm going to do it this way.
But couldn't you just blast them away?
Is what I'm saying?
Like, hey, look, I will buy your house from you right now and kick you out if you keep
sassing me.
Don't you think that they would be like, oh, that's my girl.
I love her now.
Come have dinner.
Dude, what you just said reminds me of, because I mean, some people mean this as a joke

(40:18):
and some people are serious, but sometimes when a straight woman is going through a breakup,
other women and maybe some men say, you know what you should do?
You should marry his dad and make him your stepson.
Like, yeah, that'll show him.
I'm like, hmm, but what if grandpa has even more money than his dad?

(40:41):
Oh, shit.
Oh, man.
Oh, man.
Hey, then get the grandpa or get the grand mall.
Get a grand mall.
That's what I'm saying.
Like, not only that, but here's the thing, buy and be like, listen, grandpa, listen, take
you Dan Viagra.
I'm going to give you $10,000.
We're going to do this photo shoot and we're going to send it to your grandson.

(41:06):
What a power move.
Dan Viagra.
Oh, gosh.
Oh, gosh.
I think then he'll just develop like a fetish for, because there's this entire porn
category for like young adult women and then very old, you know, senior men.

(41:26):
And I'm like, yeah, you would probably develop a fetish if you watched that.
Or he would become a school shooter, one of the two.
Oh, no.
Hopefully not that.
Yeah.
I mean, could you imagine like, let's say that your boyfriend was like, hey, listen, you know
what, you're too much to handle with your food choices and shit.

(41:48):
I can't put up with you anymore.
I'm going to date your mom and I'm going to send you a video of me, you know, the
getting, you know, saying, getting crazy, getting freaky.
Like when that crush you, that would crush me because I don't think you would treat my
mom better than my dad.

(42:10):
That's so sweet.
Yeah.
I mean, of course my dad could be a little nicer to my mom, but I cannot imagine my mom
with anyone.
I just put my dad.
Is your boyfriend like your dad in any way?
Oh, hmm.
Let's see.

(42:30):
I think my dad only had kids because he felt pressure to and my boyfriend does not want to
have kids either except we were born in a time where it's more acceptable to be childless.
Yeah.
That's one of the things that we kiss about if I'm going to use your language because

(42:51):
I'm like, dude, I think my parents only had my siblings.
And I, because they felt pressured to and then my boyfriend is like, no, I think they did
it because I love it.
I'm like, no, everybody in their time felt pressured to have kids regardless of whatever
life circumstances they had.
And it's funny because his parents actually made it very blatant about whether or not they

(43:16):
wanted to have kids.
And the answer is no, but he's forgiven his parents.
So he's like, hunky, dory.
And I'm like, wow, you're such a forgiving person.
I mean, well, I'm just like creating these scenarios in my head and then making myself mad
because I thought of these scenarios.
Does your boyfriend get jealous of your work?

(43:40):
Oh, um, probably not of the work itself, but the benefits I reap because one of the benefits
I reap is that I can pretty much take a vacation whenever I want it.
Like, no, I'm talking about the male attention.
All of the male attention.
Yeah.
Like, is he okay with like you going and maybe dance for other guys and other guys like, you

(44:00):
know, lusting after you?
The thing is I, I have some regulars, but it's very, very few.
Most people are like, Wambam, thank you, ma'am.
I talk to them for like one day and then I never hear from them again.
And I would imagine you, if you were a jealous type, you would be more jealous of the regulars,

(44:22):
the repeat people and not really the people who like talk to you for 30 minutes and then
never again.
Yeah.
I see.
I think the opposite because I've, I've talked to other strippers and stuff like that and
their boyfriends are wildly jealous.
Like, hey, I'm coming pick you up from the club.
I'm going to be there.
I may show up on a random Tuesday just to make sure.

(44:43):
That makes you laugh.
Yeah, just to make sure I never quite understood that to me.
That doesn't make sense to me either.
It does it to, it's like, hey, my girlfriend, you know, I'm going to be there.
My girlfriend is so fucking hot that like all of these men want her, but guess who has her?
I do, right?
She comes home to me every night.
Like, but it seems like that is not a popular mindset between jealous guys.

(45:05):
Oh gosh.
But I do think he's probably, I don't think he resents me, but he probably wishes I had the
benefits that come with my job, which is being able to go on vacation whenever you want.
Yeah.
Or not me.
March, I went to New York City for several days with a friend and then I just came back from

(45:28):
Southern California and New York was fun.
I love going on friend vacations on family vacations.
I get into so many fights with, you know, family and then what is that vacation?
It's just chill.
Right.
Right now, if anybody is watching or listening to this right now, they're asking the same
question.
Why do you still fuck with your family?

(45:50):
Because it's like it keeps coming up.
What is the motivation?
Because I mean, my, yeah, my boyfriend had a very tumultuous relationship with his parents
when he was growing up, but now he's chill with his mom and his dad.
So I'm like, if he was able to accomplish that, then maybe it's possible for me to and,

(46:16):
you know, his parents, they never married, well, they never married each other.
I should say that.
His father is married.
And so like his mom raised him all by herself.
I mean, grandparents were in the picture, but I think they passed away when my boyfriend was
like 10.

(46:36):
And so the father went to court because he didn't want to pay child support and she like,
I'll do everything in my power to get the judge on my side.
And you know, my boyfriend has forgiven his parents for these things and I mean, even though
he's forgiven his dad for that, he has absolutely no relationship with his step family.

(47:01):
And I'm like, hmm, that does sound very tumultuous, but he was able to forgive his parents.
And while he doesn't have a relationship with his step family, he does have a relationship
with his mom and his dad, despite both of them living like time zones away from San Francisco.
So I'm just like, if he was able to make it work, then maybe I could make it work in the

(47:27):
future.
You're, you have a beautiful soul.
That is awesome.
Thank you.
I think, I think a lot of people would have just said, you know, screw you.
I know you raised me for 18 years and probably sacrificed many sleepless nights and stuff,
but I'm done with you, throw you in the trash.
But you still have hope that it will work.

(47:47):
I mean, my boyfriend is a huge source of inspiration for me and I very, sometimes I lie awake
at night and I wonder to myself, do I inspire him?
Because even though I have like podcasters left and right saying, wow, your story is so
interesting, so inspirational, yes, girl, get it queen.

(48:10):
I just think to myself, but do I inspire the people closest to me?
Because if the answer is no, that would, that would be like the world is ending.
But he probably does find me inspiring.
I just need to have higher self esteem.

(48:31):
But that's kind of what happens when you're raised by people who probably only had you
because they felt pressured too.
Well, I think it's interesting that you even desire to be an inspiration.
I've never desired to be an inspiration for no one.
But to be honest, he probably is inspired by you if any way, and this may sound bad,
but he's like coming home to this beautiful acrobat chick and like banging her every night.

(48:56):
Like how is that not inspiration?
Oh, like that makes you, it's like, yo, you come home to like a girl or a woman who takes
care of herself actually wants to fuck you and is interested in it.
And who is like beautiful like that?
It's like, oh my gosh, you know what?
I got to get a goddamn right.
I got to do something.
I got to go to the gym.
I got to do something.
And it's a weird guy thing, but I have seen it happen like a lot.

(49:19):
It's like, man, man, I'm like, Steve, what are you doing?
Man, you working over time.
I'm like, shit.
Susan at home, man, she, man, I'll tell you what, she wore that lingerie, boy, she, I'm
all worked up.
So you probably, you, you make that face.
Yeah.
That's just so funny.

(49:41):
So you probably, at the least, you inspire him that way, but is that enough for you?
Ooh, that's such a good question because, because we have multiple influences.
He probably wants to be a good person to make me proud, but also to make his mom proud.

(50:09):
And you know, it's probably nice that he gets to be more mature than his father was at his
age.
But then it's also probably nice to be a good person so that his dad could be like, yeah,
my son is awesome.
I think you get that father stamp of approval and then, you know, his, okay, so clearly I

(50:36):
care a lot about my family.
I have two deceased grandfather's and I think about them all the time.
I don't know how often he thinks about his grandparents who are all past.
So I don't know if he often thinks, you know, I have to be a better version of myself to make
my ancestors proud.
That's how I think.

(50:58):
And it's, I mean, we all have multiple influences and I definitely try so hard at everything
I do because I'm always trying to prove people wrong.
I'm always trying to be like, well, I'm going to prove to my parents that I can be successful
even without a college degree.
And it's, it's, I, as a kid, I never defined myself as a competitive person, but as an adult,

(51:29):
I'm like, I'm not 100% fueled by spite, but I'm like 50% fueled by spite.
That is awesome.
This, I'll be honest, I would love to talk like the more you talk, the more I'm like, I
want to talk to your boyfriend.
Where this sounds like the most incredible guy ever.
Oh, okay.
I've never heard a chick talk about her boyfriend in such a glowing way like you do.

(51:52):
He must be awesome.
He is.
And it's, it's a, it's a good ant about thing because, you know, I grew up with a middle class
family.
He grew up dirt poor and he was able to get not only a bachelor's, but a master's degree

(52:15):
when he was in his 20s.
And then it's like, I have all this privilege as a kid going to, you know, an affluent high
school and then a four year college.
I didn't even do community college.
I just went straight to a four year college pandemic happened.
And then I really struggled with online classes.
And then after a while, I'll like, fuck it.

(52:38):
Like, I'm probably making more money through sex work than I probably would with a job
that requires a degree.
And so like sometimes I think to myself, why, why, how come he got to defy all the odds?
And then I came up with privilege and yet I wasn't even able to get a associate's degree.

(53:04):
And of course he would say, well, I never, ever looked down upon you because you don't have
the same credentials that I have.
And I think a lot of it has to do with like memory retention because this is something I
noticed when I was like a freshman in college because even though I don't have fancy degrees,

(53:28):
I do remember a lot of what I learned.
A lot like ninth grade English.
I remember like sixth grade ancient history.
I remember like college anthropology lessons.
And so when I talk to my boyfriend, I'm like, oh, yeah, do you remember having to do this

(53:49):
like stock market simulation in statistics class?
And he's like, I don't even remember what I ate for lunch this morning.
And I'm like, oh, the memory retention is bad.
And it's like, I did not meet my boyfriend prior to 2020, but a part of me is like, maybe,

(54:11):
maybe the memory retention was bad prior and then COVID made people's memory exorbitantly
worse.
And that that scares me because we have internet access.
But the whole world is at our fingertips.

(54:33):
We can like search up, you know, FDA like court cases from 1980 and but we can't even remember
something we saw on TV an hour ago, right?
And it's like, oh, no, oh, no, no, no, no, no.
Why is that a bad thing?
Like people would say this is a good thing.

(54:53):
It's like, hey, we have technology now.
Like previously people would remember like maybe manuscripts and stuff like that until we
got the printing press.
It's like, hey, you don't have to remember that.
Here's a book.
So that's what people would say, but it sounds like innately deep in you.
You're like, this is bad.
I need to remember.
Knowledge is power like books can be burned.

(55:17):
Computers can be destroyed.
But if you have that knowledge inside of your brain, I guess other people can try to
beat that knowledge out of you.
But I'm so fueled by spite, I don't be like, no, my body can withstand all that shit.
So it's, I mean, like I said, when it comes to stripping, I have to remember the stuff

(55:40):
by absorbed when I was doing my hour long drive to work and then be like, you know, I was
listening to this really good podcast on my drive here.
Do you like your, I don't know, your hard-boiled eggs at room temperature or like refrigerated
and then we'll have this fun debate as to whether or not double eggs should be at room

(56:04):
temperature.
I'm a saved.
They should be at room temperature.
And so we could have that tip right now.
I don't know if you have strong opinions about, um, deviled eggs or if you like, detest them
entirely.
Do you want to fight?
We can fight if you want right now.
Okay.
Um, I'm not a big deviled eggs fan, but what's your favorite movie and don't say Shawshank

(56:31):
redemption?
Oh, okay.
The first movie that came to my mind was Titanic because it's, it's a, it's a movie that
I watched in theaters all by myself.
And then after that, I was like, you know, I think I should go to the movie theaters by myself

(56:51):
more often.
Well, guess what?
That movie sucks and you share it because you're lonely.
Fight me.
I mean, the scenes they did in the water look spectacular.
You cannot tell that it's in like a little kitty pool in a garage.
It is so crazy how they did it.
What do you think about?
I was just talking to someone the other day about this.

(57:14):
If you were on the Titanic, okay?
And you're rose, right?
You're the, you're Leo's girl.
Oh, Leo's girl.
And like, would at the very end, when you're in the water, everyone's about to die, would
you give Leo the door so he doesn't die?
You met him three days ago?
No, no.
Fuck him.
I mean, with all due respect to Jack, like he didn't really have any, okay, I guess Jack

(57:43):
and Rose didn't really have direction in life.
And then once they met each other, they were like, I know what my purpose is, but I don't
know.
With Rose, it seemed like she had a character arc.
Like in the beginning, she was really depressed because she didn't get along with her mom,

(58:04):
relatable.
And then she met Jack and she's like, oh my gosh, you're so amazing.
Like, let's, let's live our lives together whereas Jack, I don't know what his arc is.
He started out as a very happy, go lucky, carefree dude.
And then he just was that for the entire duration of the movie.
And he's a likable character, but I'm like, there's no, there's no arc.

(58:27):
He's not, I don't, I don't think Rose changed him.
Not that I want her to be a manic pixie dream girl, but it's like, he got his dick wet.
That's the most, that's the most change that happened after he met her.
Like, he was able to get it different.
And honestly, like, not just dick wet, but like dick wet and like some royalty push, like

(58:52):
some, like some, like some, like some great a, like this, like that was his arc.
He was like, hey, I'm fucking broke is shit.
And then I got lucky and now I'm around these rich people like, and then it stays flat.
But he got like, he got that, he got to draw her, he got to show her like, ooh, look at
my skill.
But he paid for it with his life.

(59:13):
But that kind of flips this trope because there are so many movies like Mulan Rouge where it's
like, oh, budding romance.
But then oh, she dies.
And you don't, or at least I can't name that many romance movies.
Or it's like the man dies.

(59:35):
I mean, preferably I would not want either person to die, but if somebody has to die, they're
very few hetero romances I can name where the man dies.
That is such a good point.
He always comes out on top, right?
In like, every single way possible, the relationship, everything.
What I found interesting about the Rose and Jack thing was Jack was fit, he was, I'm guessing

(01:00:01):
he's physically stronger than Rose.
So he could have removed her from the door and saved his life.
But she put that thing on him.
So damn good.
This boy was hypnotized.
Oh my Lord.
He was legitimately hypnotized.
He actually, it seemed like he was hypnotized.
Pussmatized.

(01:00:21):
He put that thing on his cheek and oh my goodness.
Boy.
And so, and that was what's so interesting is because like you have to realize like Jack probably
could have made it.
But he was so in love, pusmatized, whatever this, he's like, I will freeze to death just to

(01:00:44):
touch you for one more second.
That's true love.
Would you do that for your boyfriend right now?
I'm not Jack.
I'm Rose in that situation.
Oh no.
So you said, listen, I'm sorry.
You have to go.
It's your time.
You're going to die.
I got to pass on them good genes, them good memory retention genes because I mean, it's

(01:01:14):
pretty interesting how our sweet patterns differ because he's the kind of person where
if he wakes up in the middle of the night and I say something to him and then he falls asleep
five minutes later in the morning who won't remember a thing.
And then I have to tell him, did you know that in the middle of the night, I said this
to you and then you said this back to me and it's he's like, I don't remember.

(01:01:39):
Oh my god damn, I could like confess to murder.
I won in the morning and if he falls asleep like five minutes later, he'll be none the
wiser.
Not that I've ever committed murder.
But one of my fears when it comes to co-sleeping is that all mumbles something in my sleep
that is entirely false, but they're like, oh my god.

(01:02:01):
Yes, yes.
And yes, so for that has never happened.
He told me I smile in my sleep, which is terrible.
You're going to get wrinkles.
Okay, well, he laughed in his sleep and I've co-slept with a lot of people, but I've never

(01:02:22):
met somebody who laughed in his sleep.
And then me being me and what he's probably having a very funny gene right now, but if I
ask him what was so funny in the morning, he'll be like, I don't remember what the joke was.
I don't remember what was so funny.
And then I'm like, I'm on the out of something that's probably hilarious.

(01:02:42):
Like I have videos like I'll take out, I'll take out my phone and I'll start videoing,
laughing.
And I know deep down if I show him the video later and be like, well, what was so funny?
He'll be like, I don't know.
That's just a video of me laughing my sleep.
I don't remember.
And oh, well, that's just our dynamic.

(01:03:03):
That's creepy.
That's a smidge creepy.
I listen, we're friends, but you're like, I want to record you in your sleep while you
laugh.
He's taken photos of me smiling in my sleep.
And I swear it's like very innocent.
It's not like, I think if you moha, in his sleep, I would start laughing and that would

(01:03:28):
wake him up and he'll get pissed at me.
And then I'm indigable.
Well, I'll take back the creepy label.
Okay, sure.
I'll take it back because he started it, right?
If he's taking pictures of you, that's actually like very sweet of him.
Sounds like a great guy that he would take pictures.
Why don't you like do like some confessions like he said?
Like for example, nobody's perfect in relationships.

(01:03:50):
So maybe whenever he's in this state, just be like, yeah, that bread you cooked tasted
like shit.
You get it off your chest, he doesn't know.
Well, I think he's probably not going to listen to this.
So I could say this.

(01:04:11):
One way he could prank me would, because he knows how to get me to smile and I'm asleep.
One way he could prank me is he could say something that I normally wouldn't smile at
when I'm awake, but then get me to do that while I'm asleep and be like, you're subconscious
mind actually likes this or you're subconscious mind actually thinks these jokes are funny.

(01:04:36):
His jokes are funny.
I can like see ways he could prank me with that because.
Do you want him to prank you?
It seems like it.
No, but it's just, I think it's romantic how even when I'm unconscious and he like
talks to me or like touches my hair, I like, I subconsciously smile when he does that.

(01:05:03):
He tells me he says, I love you when I'm asleep and then I just start smiling.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
That is actually really sweet and that is awesome.
Do you like, how would you feel if he cheated on you?
I would.
Oh, there's so many factors like there's the cheating but then not admitting to it.

(01:05:28):
There's the cheating and admitting to it.
There's cheating on somebody your age and then cheating on cheating with an 18 year old.
There's the like telling somebody, hey, we got to do this on the deal and then there's
lying to somebody and saying, oh yeah, I'm saying don't worry.
There's like so many factors.
What would be the most heartful one to you?

(01:05:50):
Oh, I think, I think grooming an 18 year old or somebody even younger would be, that would
be absolutely devastating.
Yeah, that would be, but he sounds like great God.
He would be.
I guess impregnating an 18 year old would be the most devastating.
Well, what if he impregnated a 15 year old?

(01:06:12):
They can get pregnant.
I like that different.
I don't know.
I don't know.
But somehow that was able to happen, I would be scared because I'm like, what is the mortality
rate for people who give birth at 50?
Because I would imagine that the mortality rate is higher than if say a 29 year old gave

(01:06:38):
birth.
Dad.
I'm like, damn.
Yeah, I don't know about that, but he would never do that.
Do you think, so you're a pro-cuddleer?
Would you cuddle with P. Diddy right now?
That is the most random question I've ever gotten on a podcast and I've done a lot of
podcast interviews.
Thank you very much.

(01:06:59):
I think.
Somebody of that caliber is a bit, I think he has get away with murder money.
So he's a bit too rich for me to cuddle like in a private area.
I guess he was like, let's do this in a public area where there's like a bunch of people

(01:07:24):
who could keep and I knew I'd be like, cool, because I don't want to be in like a hotel
room alone with somebody with get away with murder money, especially not on like a boat
and all the rich people have yachts in.
I don't, I'm not trying to judge, but whenever I hear about a provider agreeing to go on

(01:07:47):
like a yacht in the middle of a lake or ocean or something with an absurdly rich person,
I'm like, oh, come on.
They could like grab your cell phone, you're only lifeline and just chuck it in the water,
like, yeah.
And then you have no lifeline.
And that's the thing too.
And now everything that happens on that boat is he said, she said, and you're going to

(01:08:09):
lose because their lawyers are better.
Oh, wait, I don't do boat cuddles.
I guess if it's like parked in the dog, if it's still in the marina, it's fine, but, but you
know, I could, I could be in a bathroom or something and then they can like turn on the boat
and start, you know, driving out of the marina.

(01:08:31):
And then I'll be like, I don't know where I am.
I'm just, I could be like one knot away from civilization or like 30 knots.
I don't know.
Exactly.
And that's the thing is, I'm sure a lot of people do go on y'all's with very rich people and
I kind of get it because we all need money and it's like, hey, this rich person, like, hopefully,
like best case scenario is all they want is like, maybe sex.

(01:08:53):
Like that's the best case scenario, right?
Oh gosh.
It's funny because I have this vivid memory from like four years ago.
I was listening to a podcast that I do not listen to anymore, but the podcast hosts were
like, I know this is just, I know this is just anecdotal.
This is all alleged, whatever.

(01:09:13):
But I hear that when Rio de Caprio has sex with women on his yacht, he has like headphones
on and he's just listening to EDM and I'm like, I've done, I've done it to music before,
but it's not like what headphones on.
And it's definitely, it's definitely not like one person is listening to music and the other
person is not like, maybe that's a good sensory experience, but if I had to choose music, I

(01:09:41):
would not choose like rave music to do it.
And you know what?
I'm going to kind of question that allegation because Leo doesn't look like he's in the
best shape.
And if you have in sex to EDM, it's like, ah, right.
Oh, my gosh.
I don't think he has a stamina.
Like, it takes a lot to do that for more than five minutes.

(01:10:02):
But that is actually a very, very good, um, that's why my fat ass, I have, I have sex to bump
and grind.
Like, let's go slow here, right?
I'm not trying to sweat.
Honestly, I've done it to miracle music, but now I'm like, hmm, if, if I listen to music
in a language that I comprehend, I'm going to start focusing too much on, on like the song

(01:10:29):
composition and the, ah, I don't know, the motifs in the lyrical poetry and then I'm
going to focus less on, ah, myself and I don't need that.
And so, so I guess I'm very picky with the music I do it to, but also as, as a stripper,

(01:10:51):
like, the, the bump in grind, like, that's music I associate work with.
And my boyfriend, he loves high energy music.
That's one of the first things I noticed about him when we met in 2021.
And I told him, you listen to very strippery music.
And I'm the first stripper he ever dated.

(01:11:12):
And he's like, oh, really?
And I'm like, yeah, if you've never been to a strip club, he's like, only once in my entire
life.
And that was like 10 years ago.
And I'm like, oh, well, you listen to a lot of strippery music.
And for the most part, that's not a bad thing, but he kind of listens to the same 10 songs
on repeat.
And I'm like, you got to, you got to listen to something else sometimes.

(01:11:36):
And he's like, but if I listen to music while I'm driving, that isn't super like upbeat,
I'm going to fall asleep behind the wheel.
And I can't really argue with that, but also, I like listening to calming music when I
try.
I don't, I don't road rage.

(01:11:58):
I feel like I'm the only person in my family who doesn't road rage.
And I'm just throwing my entire family under the bus.
But I'm like, the only person who doesn't road rage, I don't have a single road rage
bone in my body.
And maybe listening to calming music helps out a lot.

(01:12:22):
Would you make love to Taylor Swift?
And if so, which era would be the best?
Oh gosh.
It's funny because I grew up listening to Taylor Swift.
And so I know what music she released when she was like 15, what she released when she was
20.
And I don't listen to her music after, honestly, after she went pop.

(01:12:46):
But then again, I don't really want to do it to her country music, because I know she
was a minor for a majority of her country career.
I just don't want to fuck to music made by minor.
It's just, I can't do it.
But I also don't listen to her pop music.
Oh my gosh.
So like, what's the last, like what's the last, the newest T-Swift song you've listened

(01:13:12):
to you think?
Ooh.
Oh.
Five years old.
Eight years old.
I remember when she released the red album and I really enjoyed the song.
Okay.
I could look it up right now, but there are the kind of lyrical poetry she released when

(01:13:39):
I was a kid.
I think is good because of nostalgia, but also good on its own.
I swear I'm not clouded by nostalgia.
But I really enjoyed how her, how her verse structures were and how her chorus structures
were when I was a kid.

(01:14:00):
And in addition to the interesting way she structured her music, I really enjoyed, for
example, red.
I, I do get this anesthesia reaction when I listen to red.
And I don't really deem myself a person with anesthesia.
I do kind of have anesthesia when I, or I've talked about anesthesia with my boyfriend a

(01:14:24):
lot because I, I really want to go back to filmmaking and I have an idea about music in relation
to the colors of the rainbow.
I'm not going to reveal too much yet, but this, like, since I'm in the planning stage, I've

(01:14:44):
talked about this with my boyfriend, I talked about this with a best friend, and I've learned
that different people can listen to the exact same song and think of different colors.
Like I showed this one very, like, so tree jazzy song to my boyfriend, and I'm like, this
is purple.
And to be more specific, like a velvety purple.

(01:15:05):
This, I kind of associate all jazzy songs with that, but, um, you know, velvety burgundy
or velvety purple.
And then he goes, this is like a light blue summary, you know, listening in the meadow kind
of, I really, really, because this song is so sexy, so, and I don't really associate

(01:15:26):
sexy songs with, you know, frallicking in a meadow on a summer's day, but that's what he got
from it.
That's so interesting.
What color of EDM be?
Wouldn't it be like bright pink?
It would be psychedelic, bunch of colors, flooding your retinas.
Have you ever tried any psychedelic drugs?
And are they fun?

(01:15:47):
No, but I've heard, I live in this San Francisco Bay Area, so pretty much everyone here does
drugs.
So I've heard a lot of different accounts.
Like, I've heard that cocaine tastes absolutely awful.
And my boyfriend has done cocaine.
And from what I hear is that it tastes awful, but then because of the vaso nasal congestion,

(01:16:12):
the taste goes away in like five seconds or something.
Yeah, I like pay attention to the scientific part of drugs because I don't partake it, partake
myself, but I am a Narcan first aid certified person.
And one of the things that pissed me off when, I'm not, my boyfriend doesn't do drugs anymore.
But he told me that he wants to do drugs with his cousin and neither of them, even, never

(01:16:40):
even heard of Narcan.
I thought, I'm like, y'all are doing okay.
In neither of you were first aid certified and neither of you had ever even heard of Narcan.
And he's like, I didn't know what Narcan was until I met you.
And I'm a sober person.
And so I'm like, I'm concerned.
And I'm like, why are all of my friends, well, not all of them, but some of my friends doing

(01:17:02):
drugs and they don't even know what Narcan is?
I, I don't know if I have other friends who are first aid certified.
And I think all of us should be CPR trained.
You never know when somebody's going to have a heart attack or a drown or anything like
that in your better safe than sorry.
Of course.

(01:17:22):
Yeah, even the first stuff, like I have dogs and like the first thing I'm like, I need
to know what to do if they're choking and eating.
Exactly.
Yeah, it's because that's the thing is like they eat the wrong thing and they will die in
my arms while I'm trying to save them if I don't know what I'm doing.
And it blows my mind because you know, the same cousin.

(01:17:43):
I love dearly, but I don't think she took any infant CPR classes when she was pregnant.
So I hope she has taken some now that she's postpartum, but I'm like, oh dear.
Like, oh dear.
She's a piece of shit, mother.
Just say it.
She's not a piece of shit mother because it's not her fault that her boyfriend walked out

(01:18:06):
on her like the day of the child's birth.
Why did he do that?
Why did he do that?
Because he's the piece of shit.
Oh my gosh.
I'm so sorry for calling her piece of shit.
And it's, I don't know how far away the nearest hospital is to her, but the town they live

(01:18:29):
in is like they have a reputation for having really good child care, like literally free child
care.
Free.
And so I can't judge her too much because she's choosing to raise her kid in a place where
child care is assessable.

(01:18:49):
That totally makes sense.
I once heard a story about a guy who actually died in San Francisco because there was fint
in all on one of the bird scooters and he touched the handle of the bird scooter and
oh, deed.
Oh no.
Have you ever heard stories like that?
Is that even possible?
I don't think it's possible to die from just touching it.

(01:19:10):
I'm pretty sure you have to ingest it.
And oh gosh.
This is, okay.
So there's this one sex worker activist in either Canada or New York, maybe New York who
recently passed away.
And by recently, I mean, like a month or two ago.

(01:19:33):
And this morning I heard the news say that she passed away from a fentanyl overdose.
And knowing what she stood for when she was alive, I think she would want people to know
the cause of death because if people know the cause of death, then there would be more
motivated to learn about first aid, CPR, nor can.

(01:19:59):
Always test your drugs before using them.
And I'm just very blessed to live in an area where nor can education is.
Accessible.
And I may not know where my testing kit is at the moment, but if you like give me one

(01:20:24):
of those little paper test strip thingies, I'll know what to do.
I know that you take like a little bit of the powder and you mix it with water and then
you test it and then you're like, okay, it's good.
Okay.
I'm going to.
The other stuff.
Yeah.
I've heard that in certain like sex work industries, specifically porn, that like the suicide rates

(01:20:47):
are really, really high for the women and they have lots of, I guess, higher rates of mental
health issues.
Like, what do you think causes that?
Honestly, I would not be surprised if the suicide rate is also high for the men, but I understand
why it's gendered because the women do get discriminated against by police.

(01:21:12):
And is it because they're at the stars like nobody watches porn to see the guys dig?
It's like I'm watching Layla London, like I'm not watching the guys.
So I'm like, you're watching gay porn.
Oh, shit.
That is true.
I guess that is true.
And so it's honestly, it could be a plethora of things because I think one of the most

(01:21:35):
eye opening parts, because I've come out to several relatives like my aunt on my
dad's side.
And one of the go to reactions is, well, don't get addicted to anything or doesn't it suck
that you get sexualized so much?
And I'm like, there is sexual objectification, but then there's non-sexual objectification.

(01:22:00):
And I would argue that families of sex workers tend to do a lot of objectifying of the sex
worker member of their family.
Yes, I can understand why the sexualization may hurt, but in my personal opinion, I think
the non-sexual objectification hurts even more because I don't like being a monolith.

(01:22:27):
I don't want to be one-dimensional.
I am a lot of things.
And I want to be seen for those many layered, compounding things.
And I would assume the suicide rate is high is because a lot of people think, well, if

(01:22:48):
you're a porn star, that's all that you are.
And porn star equals bad.
And I would like to imagine a world where the law is on sex worker side.
And then also the average person is compassionate towards sex workers.

(01:23:10):
So you think if we didn't objectify porn stars and sex workers so much, we could literally
save lives?
Yes, because with other professions, we can understand, yeah, this person who's waving away at an
oil rig in Alaska may not support polluting the atmosphere, but we can like kind of

(01:23:32):
understand why they would spend months away from their family at a time to do very back-breaking
labor.
It's not because they love polluting that atmosphere.
It's probably because they're like the only source of money for their family or the red
winner for their family.
And so they have to do the job so that their spouse, their children, their parents, grandparents,

(01:23:58):
siblings, who ever have food on the table.
Hi, honey, my boyfriend's home.
And I think people should look at sex workers that way.
Like sure, sometimes I partake in things that I don't really want to do, like selling my
urine to a probably abusive father.

(01:24:18):
But I do that because I need to put gas in my car.
I do it because I need groceries.
I do it because I need to pay a freelancer to fix appliances in my house.
Not because I love punishing the kids for smoking weed.

(01:24:40):
It's because I have all these household duties that need to be fulfilled.
Of course, yes.
And whenever the rubber meets the road, if you're out of work for, let's just say,
six months or whatever, you have no more savings and you have kids or family members or yourself
who needs to eat.
Man, let's just be honest, we would all almost do anything, right?

(01:25:03):
We have to eat after survive.
And so it, yeah, I don't think we should objectify these people.
And I think the oil worker was a great example too.
It's like, listen, we do stuff to put money on the table and it is what it is, right?
I am not my work.
Look at me started on the fishing industry because like, dude, because there's currently

(01:25:30):
this huge battle with these Filipino fishermen with this exploitative ass company.
And it's like, they don't make money the way strippers do because with stripping, I can be
like, I am not accepting cash after the lap dance.
You are giving me the cash before I do the lap dance.
They don't have that privilege and I would have that privilege of, you know, sleeping in a

(01:25:58):
house that isn't, you know, rocking with the ocean waves.
And so it sucks because they are taking a gamble.
They are like, okay, I am just going to agree to be on this ship for three months at a time.
And you know, fingers crossed, the promise is kept at the end of those three months.
Like, at least for me, if I stripping in Guam, I could be like, you know what, this ain't

(01:26:22):
it.
And then book a plane ticket back to San Francisco.
They can't be like, you know what?
My boss is exploitative as hell.
I am just going to book a flight tomorrow morning back to my house.
Like, they don't have that option.
And so a lot of people say, well, I don't support sex work because you can't support sex
work without, without supporting sex trafficking.

(01:26:45):
And I'm like, what?
That's bogus, but then also there's forms of trafficking that's non-sexual.
Like forcing people to just be isolated in the sea for three months at a time and then
not even pay them or pay them less than what you promised.
That's some labor trafficking shit.

(01:27:07):
Like having a bunch of people from, I don't know, say Tennessee fly up to Alaska and have
them work on the oil rig and then, you know, the one woman oil worker gets raped by the
other people in the workplace and then not doing anything about it.

(01:27:28):
That's some like labor trafficking and some sexual harassment shit.
And I want this to be talked about more.
And thing is about sex workers I've observed is that we will go to the ends of the earth
for exploited people who aren't sex workers, but non sex workers won't go to the ends of
the earth for sex workers.

(01:27:49):
Even though we're all experiencing exploitation.
Yeah, that is so crazy.
And it's a great point.
There's lots of different forms of exploitation.
There's lots of small towns and stuff where people are raised and it's like, hey, if you
want to make any type of money, there's one company you can go work for, right?
And they control everything.
Unless you want to get up and move or do something like that, I don't like, do you experience

(01:28:14):
on a day-to-day life like discrimination because you are a sex worker?
I know you explain like your family and stuff like that because to me, the fact that someone
would discriminate against you for that just seems so odd because I think you're fucking
cool.
I think it's a cool last job.
Like I'm like, holy shit, tell me more.
Well, it's, I mean, the first thing that came to mind was taxes because one of the steers

(01:28:39):
types about sex workers is that we don't pay our taxes.
And frankly, the United States has a very confusing tax system.
They're like, we won't tell you exactly how much you owe us, but if you give us the wrong
amount of money, we'll send you to jail.
And it's like, what?
What?
And then people have the audacity to instead of get mad at the IRS.

(01:29:03):
Get mad at sex workers because, ooh, they don't pay their taxes because they make money
through cash.
And it's like, no, but then also get mad at Intuit, which is the parent company of Turbo Taxing
H&R Block because they're the ones lobbying to keep the tax system so confusing in the US.

(01:29:23):
Exactly.
Let me paraphrase.
Don't hate the player, hate the gain.
Where do you think, where do you think you'll be in five years?
Where will your life look like in five years?
That's case scenario.
Ooh, I think I would focus more on art, so writing, filmmaking, maybe photography?
I don't know.

(01:29:45):
Hmm.
Yeah, I think I would do more event producing because I own a dance production company.
I had my first show in February and it was a success.
I love fundraising for organizations that I'm passionate about and I just hope that I'll

(01:30:07):
inspire people not only in America, but across the world to find unique ways to fundraise
for charities that don't get enough funding.
Absolutely.
Are you in Guam?
Five years.
I think I'll split my time between Guam and California.

(01:30:27):
Also, I think that you will inspire people to support sex workers and I don't, I think
what it really is is your incredible personality, your like abundantly positive and you're genuinely
a good fucking person.
So I think that like that is extremely inspirational.
Just watching you, your stream of thought, just see like your brain bounce around and stuff

(01:30:51):
like that.
Like I think you are unique, awesome person and you make really funny faces.
Thank you for coming on podcast.
Where can people find you at?
Oh my gosh.
I am the host of the world's first podcast on professional cuddling.
It's called Pro Cuddle Hustle podcast.
My website is ProCuddleHustle.com.

(01:31:12):
You can listen to my podcast pretty much everywhere from Apple podcasts to Spotify.
I have an email address so you can book a cuddle session with me.
I'm mainly in the San Francisco Bay area but I do travel a lot to other parts of the
US including territories.

(01:31:33):
And so please don't ask me when will I come to this country because I don't do snuggle
sessions outside of the US and it's not, it's not a discrimination thing.
It's just filing taxes in the US is hard enough as is.
I don't want to fucking deal with filing US taxes and then tax it in another country.

(01:31:58):
Especially if I'm not a citizen there.
And so please book a snuggle session with me because I'm going to take a break from snuggling
pretty soon because I'm going to go.
I'm going to do all hands on deck with stripping.
Starting May after my sister's wedding and wish me all the best because I've

(01:32:21):
never, I've never stripped outside of the Bay area and I've been to Gwallem only once
in my life and that was in 2022.
So that's pretty much all that I'm going to plug.
That is also, you look like a fucking incredible snuggler too and like really fun.
Oh yes.
I don't know if you noticed but I was wearing a onesie this entire time.

(01:32:43):
I see something but I didn't want to be known.
Is that a teddy bear?
Oh yes.
Is this like snuggle attire?
I have worn this only once throughout my entire snuggle career but maybe I should get
more onesies.
It looks very cozy.
Oh thank you.
Yes absolutely.

(01:33:04):
Awesome.
Felicity, thanks for coming on.
You're awesome and I will talk to you later.
Okay, bye bye.
[Music]
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#36 Felicity Azura | An eye opening glimpse into the life of a professional cuddler and sex worker

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}#36 Felicity Azura | An eye opening glimpse into the life of a professional cuddler and sex worker