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March 21, 2024 37 mins
I wanted to hold a special space on the podcast for a loss that’s very important to recognize: the loss of a job.     Losing a job is HARD! And let’s be real, whether it’s one you genuinely enjoy or one you’re sort of “meh” about, the shock, discomfort, anxiety, and worry this can cause is undeniable.   The most stress-inducing aspect of losing a job for many of us is probably the need for a stable income to support yourself or your family. But there’s so much more to this type of loss, too. We might attach a lot of our identity to our job, treasure our colleagues, deeply enjoy the work we do, love the company… the list goes on.   The approach I wanted to take with this episode is not only to validate and acknowledge how difficult this is, but to talk about ways to cope with this loss the best we can.   That said, I wanted to take it a step further and touch on how this grief can affect our psyche and self-worth. And to build on that, we’ll finish it out with how we can reframe our mindset if this does happen to us, and how we can move forward from there with a renewed sense of hope and purpose.

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Episode Transcript

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(00:01):
This is the life with grief podcast.
The podcast that talks about and normalizes the complexities of grief life after loss and all this entails and so much more.
I want you to think of this podcast as a safe space, where I'm a friendly face, and we're just journeying through this together to figure out how to live life with our grief in tow.

(00:22):
I'm your host, Tara Acardo.
I'm a grief and transformational life coach, and I'm here to serve you.
Guidance, support, tangible coping tools, inspiration, and some laughs along the way to help you cultivate a more meaningful, intentional, and beautiful life.
But grieving or not, we're getting into countless topics here on the podcast from coping with loss to self-development and so much more.

(00:46):
I'm so grateful.
You're here.
Let's dive right in. 11 00:00:50,402.805735297 --> 00:00:53,762.805735297 Hey guys, welcome back to the life with grief podcast. 12 00:00:53,762.805735297 --> 00:00:55,262.805735297 I'm your host, Tara Acardo. 13 00:00:55,772.805735297 --> 00:01:03,392.805735297 And today I wanted to dig into a type of loss that often isn't really discussed or acknowledged in the way that I feel it should be at least. 14 00:01:03,392.805735297 --> 00:01:05,582.805735297 And that is the loss of a job. 15 00:01:06,32.805735297 --> 00:01:09,782.805735297 We talk a lot about death and the loss of a loved one on this podcast. 16 00:01:09,782.805735297 --> 00:01:10,352.805735297 But today. 17 00:01:10,832.805735297 --> 00:01:14,792.805735297 I wanted to pivot because this has really sort of been on my heart lately. 18 00:01:14,792.805735297 --> 00:01:23,852.805735297 I've seen it a lot kind of around on LinkedIn and just, I felt like it was a really important topic that we hadn't talked about it on the podcast yet today. 19 00:01:23,882.805735297 --> 00:01:24,272.805735297 So. 20 00:01:24,782.805735297 --> 00:01:36,842.805735297 That being said, the approach I want to take with this episode is to not only validate and hold a space to acknowledge how difficult this type of loss is and talk about ways to cope with this, the best that we can. 21 00:01:36,842.805735297 --> 00:01:37,472.805735297 Of course. 22 00:01:38,42.805735297 --> 00:01:45,392.8057353 But I want to take it a step further and touch on how this type of loss can affect our psyche and our self-worth. 23 00:01:45,782.8057353 --> 00:01:49,502.8057353 And to build on that, we'll finish it out with how we can reframe our mindset. 24 00:01:49,502.8057353 --> 00:01:51,182.8057353 If this does happen to us. 25 00:01:51,602.8057353 --> 00:01:55,712.8057353 And how we can move forward from there with a renewed sense of hope and purpose. 26 00:01:56,322.8057353 --> 00:02:00,912.8057353 So I wanted to kick off this episode today by first, just acknowledging job loss. 27 00:02:01,392.8057353 --> 00:02:09,42.8057353 Like I said, holding space for this and giving some credit where credit is due here, losing a job is hard and let's be real. 28 00:02:09,42.8057353 --> 00:02:14,382.8057353 Whether it's one you genuinely enjoy or one, you were sort of, kind of meh about. 29 00:02:14,802.8057353 --> 00:02:16,872.8057353 The shock, the discomfort. 30 00:02:17,202.8057353 --> 00:02:22,542.8057353 The anxiety, the worry that this can cause is undeniable for most of us, at least. 31 00:02:23,82.8057353 --> 00:02:23,802.8057353 And let's be real. 32 00:02:23,802.8057353 --> 00:02:32,982.8057353 The most stress inducing aspect of losing a job for many of us is probably the need for a stable income to support yourself or your family. 33 00:02:33,12.8057353 --> 00:02:34,392.8057353 We all got bills to pay, right. 34 00:02:34,722.8057353 --> 00:02:35,742.8057353 That probably goes without saying. 35 00:02:36,402.8057353 --> 00:02:48,312.8057353 So no matter how we might feel about our job, the feeling of comfort and, you know, bringing home that paycheck is perhaps close to number one in terms of why we even have a job in the first place. 36 00:02:48,312.8057353 --> 00:02:54,972.8057353 And hopefully it's also doing something we enjoy, but that being said, I wanted to just share an interesting statistic. 37 00:02:55,362.8057353 --> 00:03:08,682.8057353 According to an article from zippier 65% of at least United States workers are happy with their job, but only 20% consider themselves passionate about their jobs. 38 00:03:09,72.8057353 --> 00:03:15,612.8057353 And likewise, only 49% of American workers report being quote, very satisfied with their work. 39 00:03:15,792.8057353 --> 00:03:19,272.8057353 Well, 30% are just somewhat satisfied. 40 00:03:19,882.8057353 --> 00:03:21,442.8057353 So think about that for a moment. 41 00:03:21,472.8057353 --> 00:03:25,552.8057353 Where do you feel like you fall here? And there's really, this is not a trick question. 42 00:03:25,762.8057353 --> 00:03:27,652.8057353 It's just whatever you're feeling. 43 00:03:28,102.8057353 --> 00:03:41,212.8057353 But I just wanted to set the stage and get your mind going a little bit for a later part of the discussion that we'll be getting into that I think is really important in terms of discovering work and a job that we genuinely love. 44 00:03:41,782.8057353 --> 00:03:42,142.8057353 So. 45 00:03:42,772.8057353 --> 00:03:53,92.8057353 As far as witnessing job loss, you might be like, Tara, who are you to speak on this topic? I have personally seen job loss in two ways in my life. 46 00:03:53,122.8057353 --> 00:04:02,32.8057353 And of course see people on social media and people that I work with and people on LinkedIn, you know, so many of us struggle with this type of loss as well. 47 00:04:02,62.8057353 --> 00:04:02,542.8057353 Of course. 48 00:04:03,172.8057353 --> 00:04:08,752.8057353 One situation for me was when I was let go from a company that I was with for nearly eight years. 49 00:04:09,322.8057353 --> 00:04:13,912.8057353 And another situation was a company where I witnessed others losing their jobs. 50 00:04:13,912.8057353 --> 00:04:15,472.8057353 And I'll get into this more in a moment. 51 00:04:15,542.8057353 --> 00:04:16,652.8057353 But just to set the scene. 52 00:04:16,652.8057353 --> 00:04:21,692.8057353 I had been working for this same large company for almost eight years in. 53 00:04:22,202.8057353 --> 00:04:23,102.8057353 Different positions. 54 00:04:23,792.8057353 --> 00:04:25,22.8057353 I loved this company. 55 00:04:25,52.8057353 --> 00:04:27,302.8057353 I enjoyed the work I did for this company. 56 00:04:27,842.8057353 --> 00:04:43,832.8057353 That current position I was in when this happened was a little emotionally and physically taxing, not going to lie because I had to get up really early some mornings, like I'm talking 4:00 AM some days to get to the location. 57 00:04:43,982.8057353 --> 00:04:50,492.8057353 So basically I was a brand manager and I did merchandising and all of that had to happen in the morning before the store opened. 58 00:04:50,552.8057353 --> 00:04:54,272.8057353 And honestly, despite the early mornings, I really loved it. 59 00:04:55,112.8057353 --> 00:05:00,782.8057353 Long story short, this particular store I was working in was not doing the best financially. 60 00:05:00,812.8057353 --> 00:05:05,42.8057353 It was in a mall that had just really suffered in foot traffic in the years, leading up to it. 61 00:05:05,702.8057353 --> 00:05:08,162.8057353 And it was affecting our sales goals pretty badly. 62 00:05:08,372.8057353 --> 00:05:10,322.8057353 And so fast-forward. 63 00:05:11,72.8057353 --> 00:05:21,632.8057353 When I was let go, the store ended up closing probably four to five months later, if that, but at the time, my position was eliminated due to various reasons. 64 00:05:21,722.8057353 --> 00:05:28,442.8057353 And all of a sudden, my time at this company overall that I had spent so much of my. 65 00:05:28,802.8057353 --> 00:05:29,612.8057353 My twenties. 66 00:05:29,612.8057353 --> 00:05:32,42.8057353 And even before that, with. 67 00:05:32,822.8057353 --> 00:05:35,72.8057353 Ended it ended just like that. 68 00:05:36,252.8057353 --> 00:05:45,672.8057353 As another example of seeing some job loss around me, a company I had previously worked for face some financial woes, especially coming out of COVID. 69 00:05:46,212.8057353 --> 00:05:51,42.8057353 And they had to cut a slew of people over the span of about six months. 70 00:05:52,12.8057353 --> 00:05:58,492.8057353 I was fortunate in that I did not lose my role in this company, but some dear colleagues of mine did. 71 00:05:58,522.8057353 --> 00:05:59,2.8057353 And. 72 00:05:59,632.8057353 --> 00:06:01,72.8057353 Needless to say some took it. 73 00:06:01,72.8057353 --> 00:06:02,632.8057353 Well, some did not. 74 00:06:03,232.8057353 --> 00:06:07,402.8057353 But one interesting thing that I realized in that transition was this. 75 00:06:08,2.8057353 --> 00:06:16,72.8057353 The people that were more satisfied in their job and connected to the company or the people or the work or that it just been there a long time. 76 00:06:16,582.8057353 --> 00:06:25,132.8057353 Took the news harder than those who weren't as satisfied and hadn't been there as long, or they weren't as emotionally invested in the company. 77 00:06:25,762.8057353 --> 00:06:30,652.8057353 And for the, for those that were, I saw the effect that it had on them. 78 00:06:31,342.8057353 --> 00:06:33,412.8057353 Some somewhat from a distance. 79 00:06:33,472.8057353 --> 00:06:35,812.8057353 I might've seen something on social media that they posted. 80 00:06:36,232.8057353 --> 00:06:39,112.8057353 And in some cases I saw that firsthand. 81 00:06:39,562.8057353 --> 00:06:44,362.8057353 But either way, truthfully, it was, it was just sad to watch. 82 00:06:44,362.8057353 --> 00:06:46,762.8057353 You could tell that the wind had just been taken. 83 00:06:47,272.8057353 --> 00:06:49,372.8057353 Out of their sails a little bit. 84 00:06:49,432.8057353 --> 00:06:50,992.8057353 And also they were just now. 85 00:06:51,472.8057353 --> 00:06:54,232.8057353 Very stressed, you know, like, okay, what am I going to do next? And. 86 00:06:54,892.8057353 --> 00:06:56,332.8057353 It made me realize. 87 00:06:56,992.8057353 --> 00:07:00,502.8057353 How we truly mourn the loss of a job or a role. 88 00:07:00,862.8057353 --> 00:07:11,182.8057353 At a company that we so love, or we mourn the fact that we're not near these, you know, co-workers that really become more like family and it's, it can happen at the drop of a hat. 89 00:07:11,902.8057353 --> 00:07:17,662.8057353 So, there could be a slew of reasons of why the loss of a job could be difficult to cope with. 90 00:07:17,692.8057353 --> 00:07:22,342.8057353 So let's get some of these out in the open really quick and just validate some of these stressors here. 91 00:07:22,732.8057353 --> 00:07:24,682.8057353 If this is where you're at today. 92 00:07:25,282.8057353 --> 00:07:28,522.8057353 Like I've been saying, number one, financial stress and worry. 93 00:07:29,272.8057353 --> 00:07:32,452.8057353 As I mentioned, this is one of the primary difficulties of losing a job. 94 00:07:32,482.8057353 --> 00:07:36,142.8057353 Of course, it's this immediate impact on your financial stability. 95 00:07:36,682.8057353 --> 00:07:46,342.8057353 And the sudden loss of income can lead to, you know, financial strain, difficulty just meeting daily expenses, paying bills, feeding ourselves, or our family. 96 00:07:46,762.8057353 --> 00:07:48,772.8057353 Potentially potentially phasing. 97 00:07:49,102.8057353 --> 00:07:52,582.8057353 You know, the risk of debt or eviction, the list goes on. 98 00:07:53,542.8057353 --> 00:07:57,292.8057353 Number two though, again, kind of digging deeper into this type of loss. 99 00:07:57,892.8057353 --> 00:08:01,462.8057353 Your loss of identity or routine or emotional. 100 00:08:01,792.8057353 --> 00:08:04,582.8057353 Attachment that you had to this job or this company. 101 00:08:05,302.8057353 --> 00:08:12,122.8057353 And losing a job often means we have a daily routine of some sorts and we have the sense of purpose it for a lot of us. 102 00:08:12,152.8057353 --> 00:08:15,62.8057353 It gives us a reason to get up and get out of bed in the morning. 103 00:08:15,632.8057353 --> 00:08:18,2.8057353 And especially if you didn't see. 104 00:08:18,752.8057353 --> 00:08:24,452.8057353 It coming this, like I said, it can happen very suddenly, which is rightfully very shocking. 105 00:08:24,932.8057353 --> 00:08:32,882.8057353 And many people strongly identify with their professions and they derive a sense of identity, accomplishment, and fulfillment. 106 00:08:33,302.8057353 --> 00:08:34,262.8057353 From their work. 107 00:08:34,742.8057353 --> 00:08:40,592.8057353 And especially if someone has been with a company for many years, this can be especially hard to grapple with. 108 00:08:41,102.8057353 --> 00:08:44,762.8057353 And I know two people actually that come to mind, one in my family. 109 00:08:44,762.8057353 --> 00:08:48,482.8057353 And one I previously worked with that took months. 110 00:08:48,542.8057353 --> 00:08:55,982.8057353 I mean, seriously months to fully recover from losing a job that they had for eight years and over 20 years, respectively. 111 00:08:57,2.8057353 --> 00:08:58,712.8057353 So when a job is lost. 112 00:08:59,372.8057353 --> 00:09:03,362.8057353 It can disrupt a person's sense of self and purpose. 113 00:09:03,392.8057353 --> 00:09:05,222.8057353 It can lead to feelings of confusion and. 114 00:09:05,672.8057353 --> 00:09:08,732.8057353 You know, loss, obviously in a lack of direction. 115 00:09:09,282.8057353 --> 00:09:13,242.8057353 And additionally, I see a lot of people who feel that they are. 116 00:09:13,602.8057353 --> 00:09:15,432.8057353 Quote older in their career. 117 00:09:15,432.8057353 --> 00:09:16,182.8057353 This is their words. 118 00:09:16,182.8057353 --> 00:09:16,602.8057353 Not mine. 119 00:09:17,292.8057353 --> 00:09:19,932.8057353 Or, you know, they're just further along in there. 120 00:09:20,352.8057353 --> 00:09:21,402.8057353 Work experience. 121 00:09:21,432.8057353 --> 00:09:27,102.8057353 And there's often a concern that it will affect their chances or ability to get rehired. 122 00:09:27,702.8057353 --> 00:09:30,972.8057353 And as much as I always wish, you know, they didn't feel this way. 123 00:09:31,32.8057353 --> 00:09:31,752.8057353 Sadly. 124 00:09:32,172.8057353 --> 00:09:33,252.8057353 I understand it. 125 00:09:33,252.8057353 --> 00:09:36,402.8057353 It's so valid age discrimination is still very rampant. 126 00:09:37,332.8057353 --> 00:09:40,512.8057353 It's a totally valid concern for the record. 127 00:09:40,542.8057353 --> 00:09:43,902.8057353 I think there is a place for everyone in the workplace. 128 00:09:43,932.8057353 --> 00:09:44,382.8057353 Okay. 129 00:09:44,592.8057353 --> 00:09:47,172.8057353 Like I would be remiss if I did not call this out because. 130 00:09:47,832.8057353 --> 00:09:49,782.8057353 It's completely understandable how they feel. 131 00:09:50,892.8057353 --> 00:09:56,292.8057353 I just feel like we can make space for everyone no matter where they are at. 132 00:09:57,282.8057353 --> 00:09:59,292.8057353 In their number of years. 133 00:10:00,12.8057353 --> 00:10:01,272.8057353 On this earth. 134 00:10:01,302.8057353 --> 00:10:01,692.8057353 Okay. 135 00:10:01,722.8057353 --> 00:10:03,972.8057353 I just want to put that out there so we can do better. 136 00:10:04,2.8057353 --> 00:10:05,772.8057353 We can do so much better where that's concerned. 137 00:10:06,732.8057353 --> 00:10:13,452.8057353 But number three here as to why job loss can be hard, social isolation and emotional attachment to their colleagues. 138 00:10:13,452.8057353 --> 00:10:19,872.8057353 I've mentioned this already, but you know, work often provides a social network of sorts and a sense of belonging. 139 00:10:20,352.8057353 --> 00:10:22,572.8057353 Particularly when you really enjoy your colleagues. 140 00:10:22,872.8057353 --> 00:10:25,32.8057353 Some of us might gonna despise her colleagues. 141 00:10:25,32.8057353 --> 00:10:25,632.8057353 I get that. 142 00:10:26,82.8057353 --> 00:10:32,332.8057353 But suddenly being separated from coworkers that we might really, you know, have come to love. 143 00:10:32,962.8057353 --> 00:10:36,112.8057353 Or the work setting that we're in that can be incredibly hard. 144 00:10:36,652.8057353 --> 00:10:39,862.8057353 And losing a job can cause this undeniable. 145 00:10:40,342.8057353 --> 00:10:51,82.8057353 And sudden disconnection from our coworkers and, you know, work-related social interactions and this isolation can contribute to a lot of feelings of loneliness. 146 00:10:51,352.8057353 --> 00:10:58,552.8057353 And a loss of a support system, often for so many of us, you know, especially one of us or nine to five or, work. 147 00:10:59,32.8057353 --> 00:11:03,862.8057353 Roughly 40 hours a week or something we're spending just as much, if not more time. 148 00:11:04,402.8057353 --> 00:11:08,842.8057353 At working with these other people than we are at home sometimes, which I think is so sad, but. 149 00:11:09,772.8057353 --> 00:11:11,212.8057353 That's neither here nor there. 150 00:11:11,542.8057353 --> 00:11:16,192.8057353 But either way, this makes the situation even more challenging to navigate. 151 00:11:17,332.8057353 --> 00:11:22,402.8057353 And a fourth point here is we can have concern over career setbacks. 152 00:11:22,402.8057353 --> 00:11:32,542.8057353 So I know I kind of mentioned age here, but regardless of age, in this particular point, Losing a job can bring a lot of fear and concern for what is next in our careers. 153 00:11:33,22.8057353 --> 00:11:34,342.8057353 Gaps in employment. 154 00:11:35,2.8057353 --> 00:11:44,692.8057353 And a job loss on a resume can sometimes raise concerns for potential employers and make it more difficult to find and secure employment. 155 00:11:45,172.8057353 --> 00:11:52,312.8057353 And for those of us who lost a job, this can lead to of course, a prolonged job search added stress because of this. 156 00:11:52,732.8057353 --> 00:11:56,692.8057353 A sense of uncertainty about our professional future. 157 00:11:57,202.8057353 --> 00:11:58,252.8057353 More on this later though. 158 00:11:58,282.8057353 --> 00:11:59,242.8057353 So hang with me. 159 00:11:59,902.8057353 --> 00:12:06,352.8057353 And another point I just want to make here is the effect that a job loss can have on our relationship. 160 00:12:07,102.8057353 --> 00:12:16,372.8057353 Financial strain and emotional distress resulting from job loss can really take a toll on relationships with our family, with our friends, with our loved ones. 161 00:12:16,642.8057353 --> 00:12:18,232.8057353 With a partner, of course. 162 00:12:18,652.8057353 --> 00:12:20,272.8057353 And that added pressure. 163 00:12:21,292.8057353 --> 00:12:25,612.8057353 And changes in lifestyle can lead to it can lead to conflict. 164 00:12:25,612.8057353 --> 00:12:26,662.8057353 It can lead to tension. 165 00:12:27,142.8057353 --> 00:12:32,692.8057353 And just overall this need to readjust priorities and expectations. 166 00:12:32,692.8057353 --> 00:12:36,112.8057353 And again, sometimes that can happen very quickly, especially if. 167 00:12:36,832.8057353 --> 00:12:39,322.8057353 You are let go from a position very suddenly. 168 00:12:40,42.8057353 --> 00:12:40,492.8057353 So. 169 00:12:41,452.8057353 --> 00:12:47,302.8057353 I'll finish out these points with just, you know, the sixth thing that it can be so difficult with job loss. 170 00:12:47,332.8057353 --> 00:12:48,772.8057353 It's just the emotional distress of it. 171 00:12:48,802.8057353 --> 00:12:49,42.8057353 All. 172 00:12:49,372.8057353 --> 00:12:52,762.8057353 It can be very emotionally taxing. 173 00:12:53,92.8057353 --> 00:12:55,432.8057353 It can trigger a range of negative emotions. 174 00:12:55,432.8057353 --> 00:12:57,52.8057353 Like I said, you know, shock. 175 00:12:57,382.8057353 --> 00:13:01,642.8057353 Disbelief sadness, anger, frustration, anxiety. 176 00:13:02,122.8057353 --> 00:13:13,72.8057353 Fear of an uncertain future and especially coupled with the somewhat unfair, in my opinion, stigma, that's associated with unemployment and that can lead. 177 00:13:13,462.8057353 --> 00:13:17,932.8057353 Of course to a decline in self-esteem in some cases, a lack of confidence and just. 178 00:13:18,502.8057353 --> 00:13:20,212.8057353 Our overall wellbeing. 179 00:13:20,962.8057353 --> 00:13:26,32.8057353 So with that, all being said, just again, to validate and get all of that out in the open. 180 00:13:26,542.8057353 --> 00:13:37,342.8057353 Where do we go from here? How do we begin to make sense of all of this? How do we cope with this new reality that we find ourselves in? Figure out what all of this means for us. 181 00:13:37,882.8057353 --> 00:13:40,192.8057353 And find out what our future holds. 182 00:13:41,62.8057353 --> 00:13:42,292.8057353 Let's get into that next. 183 00:13:42,352.56041282 --> 00:13:47,381.74408629 Oh, Real quick interruption here, and then we'll get back to this episode. 184 00:13:47,771.74408629 --> 00:13:58,461.74408629 If you are someone who is experiencing some form of loss and are trying to navigate the complexities of grief, which you likely are in some capacity, if you've stumbled upon this podcast, then this message is for you. 185 00:13:58,871.74408629 --> 00:14:06,101.74408629 If you haven't heard about my intentional life after loss membership and community yet, this is truly something you need to check out. 186 00:14:06,521.74408629 --> 00:14:13,131.74408629 This membership is here to guide you into living a deeper, more meaningful and full life after experiencing loss. 187 00:14:13,921.74408629 --> 00:14:21,101.74408629 Who doesn't want that? Right? I created this membership because I know what it's like to navigate and cope with grief on a daily basis. 188 00:14:21,431.74408629 --> 00:14:26,581.74408629 I know how hard that can be and I know the tools and support it takes to do this effectively. 189 00:14:27,151.74308629 --> 00:14:31,351.74408629 I've done the work myself and I've coached people just like you to do the same. 190 00:14:32,16.74408629 --> 00:14:51,506.74408629 It comes down to having impactful, effective resources and tools at your disposal, having the right support around you from people who can understand and empathize with your grief, and having encouragement and inspiration around you consistently to not only elicit and spark change, but to keep it and keep the positive momentum going. 191 00:14:52,216.74408629 --> 00:14:54,556.74408629 Enrollment opens once a month for a limited time. 192 00:14:54,896.74408629 --> 00:14:56,846.74408629 Check out the details linked in the description. 193 00:14:57,136.74408629 --> 00:14:58,266.74408629 And I hope to see you in there. 194 00:14:58,466.74408629 --> 00:15:03,155.92775976 Oh, so let's now talk about coping. 195 00:15:03,635.92775976 --> 00:15:07,115.92775976 With this job loss, but more importantly, just finding a way. 196 00:15:07,505.92775976 --> 00:15:08,165.92775976 Forward. 197 00:15:08,645.92775976 --> 00:15:11,795.92775976 So in terms of how we can cope with this. 198 00:15:12,485.92775976 --> 00:15:14,465.92775976 Number one first and foremost. 199 00:15:15,215.92775976 --> 00:15:16,625.92775976 Allow yourself to grieve. 200 00:15:17,795.92775976 --> 00:15:22,115.92775976 Allow yourself to grieve this just as we would, the death of a loved one. 201 00:15:22,115.92775976 --> 00:15:29,15.92775976 You know, this is often the more accepted quote unquote type of grief that people are quicker to acknowledge. 202 00:15:30,425.92775976 --> 00:15:33,335.92775976 The loss of a job that deserves to be grieved as well. 203 00:15:33,335.92775976 --> 00:15:41,15.92775976 So acknowledge your feelings and give yourself permission to mourn this loss, because it is a loss that deserves to be mourned. 204 00:15:42,155.92775976 --> 00:15:45,455.92775976 It deserves that time and attention. 205 00:15:46,145.92775976 --> 00:15:51,785.92775976 It's natural to feel a range of emotions here, but processing them properly. 206 00:15:51,875.92775976 --> 00:15:56,765.92775976 That is an essential step toward healing from this. 207 00:15:57,215.92775976 --> 00:15:57,875.92775976 Sudden. 208 00:15:58,655.92775976 --> 00:16:01,115.92775976 Unexpected reality that we might find ourselves in. 209 00:16:01,905.92775976 --> 00:16:04,905.92775976 Second thing here is to seek support. 210 00:16:04,965.92775976 --> 00:16:14,865.92775976 This is so important if there was ever a time when we need emotional support, of course, outside of the death of a loved one or some other major loss. 211 00:16:16,5.92775976 --> 00:16:20,505.92775976 It's now it's a time when we are feeling pressure from countless directions. 212 00:16:20,805.92775976 --> 00:16:25,185.92775976 Uh, emotionally and financially, of course, often being the most prominent. 213 00:16:25,815.92775976 --> 00:16:28,35.92775976 Um, so I just want to encourage you. 214 00:16:28,245.92775976 --> 00:16:39,255.92775976 Don't be afraid to lean on and reach out to family, friends, or a supportive network who can provide, you know, just comfort and understanding or direction, right. 215 00:16:39,255.92775976 --> 00:16:41,385.9277598 Or can at least calm me down a little bit. 216 00:16:41,895.9277598 --> 00:16:43,245.9277598 When, when you need it. 217 00:16:43,635.9277598 --> 00:16:44,985.9277598 And when in doubt. 218 00:16:45,405.9277598 --> 00:16:50,475.9277598 I also want to implore you seek out counseling or maybe even like a business or a career coach. 219 00:16:50,925.9277598 --> 00:16:57,465.9277598 And yes, I know a coach can cost money that you might not feel that you have right now, but. 220 00:16:58,125.9277598 --> 00:16:59,325.9277598 If you can swing it. 221 00:16:59,355.9277598 --> 00:17:05,655.9277598 I really recommend this because the doors that it can unlock for you can be really incredible. 222 00:17:05,895.9277598 --> 00:17:08,535.9277598 Not only just for, for you and your mental health, but. 223 00:17:08,895.9277598 --> 00:17:12,105.9277598 It could be beneficial to you and your longterm career. 224 00:17:12,195.9277598 --> 00:17:12,645.9277598 Right. 225 00:17:12,645.9277598 --> 00:17:17,865.9277598 And if who knows, you could end up making more money, you could go in a different direction that you've never. 226 00:17:18,525.9277598 --> 00:17:19,605.9277598 Even considered. 227 00:17:19,995.9277598 --> 00:17:24,315.9277598 So in some of these cases, you know, think about it as an investment. 228 00:17:24,885.9277598 --> 00:17:25,275.9277598 Right. 229 00:17:25,305.9277598 --> 00:17:34,5.9277598 Like, who knows what you could discover with working with a professional like that, but either way sharing your feelings and your experience with others who. 230 00:17:34,635.9277598 --> 00:17:42,315.9277598 Perhaps have gone through a similar situation or maybe they haven't, but they can at least empathize and give you the right type of help that you need. 231 00:17:42,945.9277598 --> 00:17:48,795.9277598 That can help you gain some perspective and just offer you some valuable support when you need it. 232 00:17:48,795.9277598 --> 00:17:49,335.9277598 The most. 233 00:17:50,445.9277598 --> 00:17:51,435.9277598 Another thing here. 234 00:17:51,975.9277598 --> 00:17:53,85.9277598 Take care of yourself. 235 00:17:53,145.9277598 --> 00:17:59,205.9277598 I hope this goes without saying, but a shocking number of people don't prioritize this. 236 00:17:59,625.9277598 --> 00:18:02,475.9277598 So focus on self care. 237 00:18:02,775.9277598 --> 00:18:05,505.9277598 Engage in those activities that help you relax. 238 00:18:05,925.9277598 --> 00:18:10,95.9277598 And relieve that stress and I'm not going to get too far into self care here. 239 00:18:10,95.9277598 --> 00:18:11,325.9277598 I know that's like a very. 240 00:18:12,405.9277598 --> 00:18:13,845.9277598 High-level term. 241 00:18:14,295.9277598 --> 00:18:17,55.9277598 But, you know, whatever this means for you. 242 00:18:17,55.9277598 --> 00:18:17,415.9277598 Yes. 243 00:18:17,415.9277598 --> 00:18:26,975.9277598 Maybe it does mean you just treat yourself and you go get that massage that you've been putting off for so long, but it could also just mean, Getting out an exercise and getting some fresh air. 244 00:18:27,395.9277598 --> 00:18:29,375.9277598 You know, maintaining just a healthy diet. 245 00:18:29,375.9277598 --> 00:18:30,185.9277598 That is important. 246 00:18:30,185.9277598 --> 00:18:33,5.9277598 I know like those things don't always associate with. 247 00:18:33,695.9277598 --> 00:18:35,735.9277598 Loss, especially that have a job. 248 00:18:35,765.9277598 --> 00:18:37,385.9277598 You're like, I don't need to be eating healthy. 249 00:18:37,385.9277598 --> 00:18:38,435.9277598 I need to be on the job hunt. 250 00:18:38,435.9277598 --> 00:18:38,735.9277598 Like. 251 00:18:39,395.9277598 --> 00:18:49,25.9277598 Take it down a second, take a beat, making sure you are getting enough sleep and that you are taking care of your mental and physical health. 252 00:18:49,505.9277598 --> 00:18:50,885.9277598 That is really important. 253 00:18:51,215.9277598 --> 00:18:57,245.9277598 And yes, short you can job hunt your heart out and update your resume and your LinkedIn. 254 00:18:57,725.9277598 --> 00:19:01,415.9277598 And all of the good things, but you've got to make sure that you were taking care of. 255 00:19:02,165.9277598 --> 00:19:03,395.9277598 All of the above, right. 256 00:19:03,395.9277598 --> 00:19:04,895.9277598 It's just about a good balance. 257 00:19:05,715.9277598 --> 00:19:08,865.9277598 Another thing you can do here is to create a plan. 258 00:19:08,955.9277598 --> 00:19:11,295.9277598 Of course, right? This is one of the first things you can do. 259 00:19:11,715.9277598 --> 00:19:12,915.9277598 If this ever happens. 260 00:19:13,245.9277598 --> 00:19:16,485.9277598 And if the loss of a job ever happens to you. 261 00:19:17,55.9277598 --> 00:19:22,755.9277598 Think about this as taking intentional, productive steps each and every day. 262 00:19:22,875.9277598 --> 00:19:28,815.9277598 Right? So I don't want you doing this in a way that is going to overwhelm you. 263 00:19:29,655.9277598 --> 00:19:31,275.9277598 Just do this in a way. 264 00:19:31,305.9277598 --> 00:19:38,235.9277598 That's like, if you can put your head on your pillow that night and know that you did all that you could do that day. 265 00:19:38,895.9277598 --> 00:19:40,95.9277598 And feel good about it. 266 00:19:40,395.9277598 --> 00:19:42,195.9277598 That's a step in the right direction. 267 00:19:42,435.9277598 --> 00:19:49,785.9277598 So whether this is scouring job sites and doing research on what's out there and, you know, making a note of which ones you might be interested in applying for. 268 00:19:50,415.9277598 --> 00:19:57,315.9277598 Updating your resume, securing references, maybe even researching an entirely new career and what it would take. 269 00:19:57,615.9277598 --> 00:19:58,605.9277598 To get into that. 270 00:19:59,55.9277598 --> 00:20:05,115.9277598 Networking either virtually or in person loading up on training opportunities to boost your skills. 271 00:20:05,835.9277598 --> 00:20:07,515.9277598 All of the above is great. 272 00:20:07,515.9277598 --> 00:20:10,395.9277598 So developing a plan of action to move forward. 273 00:20:10,845.9277598 --> 00:20:12,75.9277598 However that looks to you. 274 00:20:12,885.9277598 --> 00:20:15,495.9277598 But doing this in manageable chunks. 275 00:20:15,525.9277598 --> 00:20:23,85.9277598 So you don't overwhelm yourself and an already very overwhelming situation, right? Like, please remember. 276 00:20:23,835.9277598 --> 00:20:28,725.9277598 Job loss can be it's a lot, you know, this, if you ever have, or are going through this. 277 00:20:29,445.9277598 --> 00:20:30,15.9277598 So. 278 00:20:30,915.9277598 --> 00:20:34,185.9277598 I want you to like give yourself time and space and grace. 279 00:20:34,275.9277598 --> 00:20:35,295.9277598 To honor that. 280 00:20:35,805.9277598 --> 00:20:37,725.9277598 But also, you know, this creating a plan. 281 00:20:37,725.9277598 --> 00:20:40,95.9277598 It can be a very empowering thing to do too. 282 00:20:40,95.9277598 --> 00:20:42,975.9277598 So I encourage you have some fun with it. 283 00:20:43,365.9277598 --> 00:20:45,585.9277598 Don't put this crazy amount of pressure on yourself. 284 00:20:46,245.9277598 --> 00:20:48,255.9277598 And I just want to interrupt myself here too. 285 00:20:48,855.9277598 --> 00:20:51,975.9277598 All of that being said, every all of those action steps I just talked about. 286 00:20:52,455.9277598 --> 00:20:54,885.9277598 Please know and remember it's okay. 287 00:20:55,215.9277598 --> 00:20:59,25.9277598 To just take a day, take a morning, take an afternoon. 288 00:20:59,85.9277598 --> 00:20:59,325.9277598 Just. 289 00:21:00,15.9277598 --> 00:21:03,795.9277598 Take a break too Drop your shoulders. 290 00:21:04,215.9277598 --> 00:21:05,565.9277598 Do some breath work. 291 00:21:05,985.9277598 --> 00:21:14,775.9277598 And just allow yourself to just be, I understand the pressure of feeling the need to like get on it and get on another job. 292 00:21:15,75.9277598 --> 00:21:16,185.9277598 I want to validate that. 293 00:21:16,185.9277598 --> 00:21:18,435.9277598 And absolutely, of course that's important. 294 00:21:18,435.9277598 --> 00:21:20,415.9277598 Especially if we have other mouths to feed, like. 295 00:21:21,75.9277598 --> 00:21:23,415.9277598 I hear you, right? This is all easier said than done. 296 00:21:23,955.9277598 --> 00:21:29,535.9277598 But also use this opportunity for this break and unemployment too. 297 00:21:29,955.9277598 --> 00:21:31,995.9277598 To reset a little bit too. 298 00:21:32,745.9277598 --> 00:21:35,475.9277598 And I just want to bike mentioned this as well. 299 00:21:35,505.9277598 --> 00:21:40,395.9277598 I, at one point with someone who was a hiring manager, On a digital marketing team. 300 00:21:41,25.9277598 --> 00:21:45,885.9277598 And even if someone had a gap in their resume, At least on our team. 301 00:21:45,915.9277598 --> 00:21:55,905.9277598 If we saw that they were doing supplemental projects or trainings or certifications or something on the side, That for us, at least was a really great sign. 302 00:21:55,995.9277598 --> 00:22:03,525.9277598 And that typically impressed us and it kind of softened the blow of like any little gap or a lapse in resume because. 303 00:22:04,395.9277598 --> 00:22:13,155.9277598 People have all kinds of reasons for being unemployed, especially if it is for, you know, maybe a little bit of a bigger or a prolonged period of time. 304 00:22:13,585.9277598 --> 00:22:19,645.9277598 A lot of employers might be more understanding of a period of unemployment than you might think. 305 00:22:19,945.9277598 --> 00:22:29,515.9277598 And listen, some might not be right, but like I said, I think many understand that life and company changes happen. 306 00:22:29,515.9277598 --> 00:22:31,615.9277598 And of course, if you get an interview or you. 307 00:22:32,245.9277598 --> 00:22:50,245.9277598 Or writing a cover letter or something that you might have an opportunity to explain some of this, but in my point of view, if you show a willingness to take the bull by the horns and learn and grow, as you're finding your way, and as you're finding this new job, How could they not give you some credit for that? Right. 308 00:22:50,245.9277598 --> 00:22:54,445.9277598 How could they not be impressed a little bit that at least shows that at least shows you're trying. 309 00:22:55,15.9277598 --> 00:23:12,415.9277598 And I, like I said, I know it's hard to communicate that sometimes if it's just in a very generic application situation, that's maybe all online, but however, you might be able to note that supplemental learning or training that you're doing get scrappy, find a way to do that. 310 00:23:12,905.9277598 --> 00:23:16,445.9277598 And also of course, hopefully this goes without saying, but following up with. 311 00:23:16,835.9277598 --> 00:23:17,585.9277598 HR. 312 00:23:17,825.9277598 --> 00:23:22,355.9277598 If the company has an HR department or a hiring department, whatever, once you apply. 313 00:23:22,835.9277598 --> 00:23:24,395.9277598 Definitely a good call. 314 00:23:24,935.9277598 --> 00:23:34,415.9277598 But regardless setting really specific realistic goals, having little steps that you're going to take each day, maybe like thinking about that, writing that out. 315 00:23:34,955.9277598 --> 00:23:41,615.9277598 And actually taking those steps towards those things can help you regain a sense of control and purpose. 316 00:23:42,5.9277598 --> 00:23:48,395.9277598 And take a little bit of that overwhelm out of it because you're being super strategic with it. 317 00:23:48,395.9277598 --> 00:23:54,425.9277598 And again, you are setting those intentional actions and you're doing them, you're doing the damn thing. 318 00:23:54,455.9277598 --> 00:23:58,265.9277598 So listen, you're working towards something that's beautiful. 319 00:23:58,415.9277598 --> 00:23:59,675.9277598 That deserves to be celebrated. 320 00:24:00,235.9277598 --> 00:24:02,605.9277598 Another aspect of this is to reflect. 321 00:24:02,815.9277598 --> 00:24:04,405.9277598 And reevaluate. 322 00:24:04,555.9277598 --> 00:24:06,805.9277598 This is my favorite part of the process. 323 00:24:06,895.9277598 --> 00:24:08,755.9277598 I cannot recommend enough. 324 00:24:09,85.9277598 --> 00:24:22,825.9277598 Using this transition period to reflect on your career goals, your values and your aspirations, and a great way to do this is to consider what you enjoyed about your previous job and what you might want in your future career. 325 00:24:22,875.9277598 --> 00:24:29,25.9277598 Use this as an opportunity to reevaluate your skills, your strengths, and maybe some areas for development. 326 00:24:29,295.9277598 --> 00:24:34,35.9277598 And as I said, it could be a chance to explore a new possibilities or make a career change too. 327 00:24:34,155.9277598 --> 00:24:34,485.9277598 Right. 328 00:24:34,485.9277598 --> 00:24:39,795.9277598 So more coming up on this a minute, when we are going to talk about reframing our mindset, but. 329 00:24:40,305.9277598 --> 00:24:43,335.9277598 First, I just wanted to share something really quick with you. 330 00:24:43,785.9277598 --> 00:24:47,955.9277598 Earlier I mentioned, I was let go from the company that I had been with for eight years. 331 00:24:48,495.9277598 --> 00:24:52,395.9277598 Just after that happened and mind you, I live in Northern California. 332 00:24:52,395.9277598 --> 00:24:55,275.9277598 So wine industry is big out here. 333 00:24:55,845.9277598 --> 00:25:04,785.9277598 But my dad was actually temporarily moving back to the east coast for work and he was going to drive across the us to do that. 334 00:25:05,295.9277598 --> 00:25:10,5.9277598 So I went with him part of the way we drove through California and Arizona and New Mexico. 335 00:25:10,5.9277598 --> 00:25:11,265.9277598 And then I flew home from there. 336 00:25:11,955.9277598 --> 00:25:21,105.9277598 And on that trip down, we were talking a lot about just where I saw my career going, you know, great father, daughter talk. 337 00:25:21,825.9277598 --> 00:25:26,145.9277598 And something that really came to me was teaching English. 338 00:25:26,205.9277598 --> 00:25:29,85.9277598 And my cousin had actually done this somewhere in Asia. 339 00:25:29,685.9277598 --> 00:25:35,685.9277598 And so I was kind of picking his brain about it and there was just something about it that really resonated with me. 340 00:25:36,255.9277598 --> 00:25:43,125.9277598 So I started doing research actually on that trip, but then I came home and I started doing more. 341 00:25:43,185.9277598 --> 00:25:48,315.9277598 And before I knew it, I got a job in the wine industry. 342 00:25:48,345.9277598 --> 00:25:52,5.9277598 So I completely pivoted from retail, like fashion, retail. 343 00:25:52,455.9277598 --> 00:25:54,75.9277598 To the wine industry. 344 00:25:54,345.9277598 --> 00:25:56,655.9277598 I got a job in a tasting room. 345 00:25:56,955.9277598 --> 00:25:58,665.9277598 And that was really fun. 346 00:25:58,665.9277598 --> 00:26:00,195.9277598 I really enjoyed that. 347 00:26:00,435.9277598 --> 00:26:17,55.9277598 And I, in the meantime, And this feels a little slimy saying this now, but as I was working for them, I was also looking at ways at making my dream come true of living in Italy, at least for a few months, however long I could. 348 00:26:17,715.9277598 --> 00:26:18,525.9277598 And. 349 00:26:19,275.9277598 --> 00:26:20,145.9277598 And I did that. 350 00:26:20,145.9277598 --> 00:26:38,955.9277598 And in that time, I not only totally changed careers and changed jobs into something that I actually really enjoyed for the time that I had it, but I was doing something and I was working towards something that I was so excited about and I knew it was going to change my life and it was going to open new doors. 351 00:26:39,435.9277598 --> 00:26:40,935.9277598 And be such an adventure. 352 00:26:41,185.9277598 --> 00:26:42,655.9277598 And I think it was maybe. 353 00:26:43,165.9277598 --> 00:26:46,225.9277598 10 or 11 months later, I made the move to Italy. 354 00:26:46,225.9277598 --> 00:26:51,835.9277598 I went and I got my it's a T E F L certification that teaching English as a foreign language. 355 00:26:52,165.9277598 --> 00:26:53,5.9277598 Certification. 356 00:26:53,5.9277598 --> 00:26:54,205.9277598 I got that in Florence. 357 00:26:54,415.9277598 --> 00:26:54,985.9277598 From there. 358 00:26:54,985.9277598 --> 00:26:58,555.9277598 I got a job in Rome, teaching English to the Italian military. 359 00:26:59,65.9277598 --> 00:27:02,905.9277598 I never ever would have envisioned any of that for myself. 360 00:27:03,235.9277598 --> 00:27:06,745.9277598 Nor would I have ever felt that that was a possibility. 361 00:27:06,745.9277598 --> 00:27:08,305.9277598 It wouldn't have even crossed my mind. 362 00:27:08,695.9277598 --> 00:27:11,65.9277598 Had this job loss not happened. 363 00:27:11,455.9277598 --> 00:27:14,275.9277598 So I just tell you this story. 364 00:27:14,815.9277598 --> 00:27:21,265.9277598 You know, hopefully to inspire you just a little bit, but also just as a Testament to, you never know. 365 00:27:21,685.9277598 --> 00:27:24,295.9277598 What opportunities are going to knock on your door. 366 00:27:24,295.9277598 --> 00:27:28,585.9277598 But of course, we also have to make it happen for ourselves too, you know, had I not. 367 00:27:29,185.9277598 --> 00:27:35,545.9277598 I just had gotten, you know, any old other job or whatever, and not kind of taking that time to explore. 368 00:27:35,695.9277598 --> 00:27:39,685.9277598 Yeah, I never would have made it to Italy, which is my dream country. 369 00:27:39,715.9277598 --> 00:27:45,985.9277598 I hope to move back there one day with my husband and my daughter, now that they have citizenship and I'm going to be working on mine. 370 00:27:45,985.9277598 --> 00:27:46,435.9277598 So. 371 00:27:47,5.9277598 --> 00:27:49,165.9277598 It's just, it's just a story. 372 00:27:49,165.9277598 --> 00:27:50,485.9277598 It's just my experience. 373 00:27:50,485.9277598 --> 00:27:56,415.9277598 But again, it's just an example of an opportunity that can come your way. 374 00:27:56,715.9277598 --> 00:28:04,545.9277598 When you really allow yourself that time and that opportunity to get to know yourself again and what you really want out of life. 375 00:28:04,765.9277598 --> 00:28:10,135.9277598 So that all being said, I want you to remember two important things here before we wrap up this episode. 376 00:28:10,885.9277598 --> 00:28:14,845.9277598 Number one, losing a job can feel like a setback for sure. 377 00:28:15,235.9277598 --> 00:28:19,135.9277598 But it does not define your worth or future success. 378 00:28:19,705.9277598 --> 00:28:26,965.9277598 First of all, I believe in you, you have that in me, my friend, but I want you to believe in yourself too. 379 00:28:27,245.9277598 --> 00:28:30,155.9277598 That is where the magic and motivation will happen. 380 00:28:30,155.9277598 --> 00:28:32,495.9277598 And that's where those things ultimately come from. 381 00:28:32,945.9277598 --> 00:28:34,295.9277598 No one can do that for us. 382 00:28:34,355.9277598 --> 00:28:37,295.9277598 No one can give us that other than us. 383 00:28:37,715.9277598 --> 00:28:43,295.9277598 And believe that with the right effort and mindset and putting your desires out into the universe. 384 00:28:43,565.9277598 --> 00:28:45,155.9277598 With the right action steps. 385 00:28:45,305.9277598 --> 00:28:49,565.9277598 You can recover from whatever this drug loss looks like for you. 386 00:28:49,955.9277598 --> 00:28:53,765.9277598 And find new opportunities that align with your goals and aspirations. 387 00:28:53,765.9277598 --> 00:28:57,845.9277598 And maybe there are things that you haven't even explored or thought of yet. 388 00:28:58,685.9277598 --> 00:28:59,705.9277598 And number two. 389 00:29:00,125.9277598 --> 00:29:04,685.9277598 Despite this current challenge, remember that losing a job is not. 390 00:29:05,225.9277598 --> 00:29:09,395.9277598 Necessarily a reflection of your worth or abilities. 391 00:29:09,875.9277598 --> 00:29:12,395.9277598 I want it also interject by saying that sometimes. 392 00:29:12,785.9277598 --> 00:29:19,145.9277598 As I mentioned, in my example from earlier, it is simply about the company and the status of that. 393 00:29:19,145.9277598 --> 00:29:20,735.9277598 And not you. 394 00:29:21,275.9277598 --> 00:29:24,125.9277598 I cannot tell you how many companies I have heard about. 395 00:29:24,125.9277598 --> 00:29:34,805.9277598 And we're a part of that, of how to let people go because of financial hardship, especially after COVID-19 and sometimes whatever the circumstances, it just comes with the territory. 396 00:29:35,435.9277598 --> 00:29:39,185.9277598 Is this fair? No, it sure does not always feel that way. 397 00:29:39,275.9277598 --> 00:29:50,765.9277598 And remember, some employers are really pained to have to eliminate positions if that's the case, but it's really just a matter of what they can afford and what they have to do at that point. 398 00:29:51,485.9277598 --> 00:29:54,665.9277598 I have totally been there, but think about it too. 399 00:29:54,995.9277598 --> 00:29:59,345.9277598 If this company can't afford you or see the value in your work. 400 00:29:59,735.9277598 --> 00:30:03,35.9277598 It might be time to find someone who can and who does. 401 00:30:03,395.9277598 --> 00:30:03,815.9277598 Right. 402 00:30:04,835.9277598 --> 00:30:09,215.9277598 So this leads me to just a quick conversation on reframing our mindset. 403 00:30:09,845.9277598 --> 00:30:15,665.9277598 While job loss can feel really devastating, highly stressful, and an absolute gut punch. 404 00:30:16,55.9277598 --> 00:30:21,335.9277598 If you are there today, I want for you to open your mind to the possibility that this can present. 405 00:30:21,695.9277598 --> 00:30:23,165.9277598 New opportunities. 406 00:30:23,645.9277598 --> 00:30:30,95.9277598 Just like in my early example and my story about how getting fired ultimately led to one of the greatest adventures. 407 00:30:30,425.9277598 --> 00:30:32,855.9277598 And career shifts I could have ever asked for. 408 00:30:33,965.9277598 --> 00:30:34,205.9277598 No. 409 00:30:34,205.9277598 --> 00:30:34,595.9277598 Yes. 410 00:30:34,655.9277598 --> 00:30:39,5.9277598 I know you might hear this all the time and people coming in from left and right. 411 00:30:39,5.9277598 --> 00:30:42,785.9277598 Telling you to stay positive and look on the bright side and it'll all be okay. 412 00:30:43,595.9277598 --> 00:30:47,975.9277598 We don't need to douse this experience with toxic positivity. 413 00:30:48,455.9277598 --> 00:30:50,75.9277598 And those platitudes. 414 00:30:50,225.9277598 --> 00:30:56,495.9277598 Sometimes we just need to sit there in our fields and be like, well, this absolutely socks. 415 00:30:56,765.9277598 --> 00:30:57,65.9277598 Right. 416 00:30:57,575.9277598 --> 00:30:58,805.9277598 But hear me out on something. 417 00:30:59,435.9277598 --> 00:31:01,445.9277598 This might be a little woo. 418 00:31:01,565.9277598 --> 00:31:02,645.9277598 What I'm about to say. 419 00:31:03,155.9277598 --> 00:31:04,895.9277598 But I want for you to consider. 420 00:31:05,345.9277598 --> 00:31:09,665.9277598 That there could be some higher power working in your favor. 421 00:31:09,695.9277598 --> 00:31:14,285.9277598 I just crack open that door for a second and open your mind to that right now. 422 00:31:14,315.9277598 --> 00:31:15,695.9277598 That is all I want you to do. 423 00:31:16,565.9277598 --> 00:31:16,925.9277598 Why. 424 00:31:17,435.9277598 --> 00:31:26,945.9277598 Because with adversity comes, growth comes learning and evolutions beyond our wildest dreams or expectations. 425 00:31:27,395.9277598 --> 00:31:34,535.9277598 There might be something bigger and better for you out there that you don't even know or see yet, but it's trying to make its way to you. 426 00:31:34,835.9277598 --> 00:31:36,995.9277598 You just have to open yourself up to it. 427 00:31:37,265.9277598 --> 00:31:43,805.9277598 And believe it's coming and welcome it with open arms and sometimes the losing of a job. 428 00:31:44,705.9277598 --> 00:31:48,665.9277598 Can lead us to that, that opens us up to that expansion. 429 00:31:49,505.9277598 --> 00:31:51,815.9277598 So just give that some consideration. 430 00:31:51,815.9277598 --> 00:32:02,765.9277598 If this is something you are going through, or if you ever do at some point, even if it's not a job loss, I would love for you to just keep this in mind all day, every day, because I genuinely. 431 00:32:03,185.9277598 --> 00:32:04,85.9277598 Think it's true. 432 00:32:04,995.9277598 --> 00:32:08,895.9277598 And in terms of finding our purpose throughout all of this. 433 00:32:09,585.9277598 --> 00:32:12,915.9277598 I'll be really blunt had my mom and dad not died. 434 00:32:12,975.9277598 --> 00:32:17,685.9277598 I likely would have never been in the Greek space doing the work that I'm doing now. 435 00:32:17,715.9277598 --> 00:32:18,585.9277598 Being a coach. 436 00:32:19,155.9277598 --> 00:32:23,985.9277598 And in this grief space though, I have found my purpose hands down. 437 00:32:24,255.9277598 --> 00:32:27,525.9277598 My purpose, my Derma, my calling, whatever you want to call it. 438 00:32:28,275.9277598 --> 00:32:34,695.9277598 I personally feel that I have found what I am no doubt meant to be doing with my life. 439 00:32:35,25.9277598 --> 00:32:38,475.9277598 Healing coaching, serving and supporting. 440 00:32:38,925.9277598 --> 00:32:44,685.9277598 And I've also found an insanely awesome group of people, many of which I now consider to be good friends. 441 00:32:45,225.9277598 --> 00:32:53,265.9277598 In this space that are highly supportive and amazing and funny and wonderful that I never would have found otherwise. 442 00:32:54,255.9277598 --> 00:32:57,915.9277598 When, you know, in your heart, you're being called to do something else. 443 00:32:58,665.9277598 --> 00:33:03,465.9277598 There's nothing like it it's simply doesn't feel like work. 444 00:33:03,825.9277598 --> 00:33:11,685.9277598 You feel fulfilled, inspired, motivated in alignment with what you are supposed to be doing with your life. 445 00:33:11,685.9277598 --> 00:33:19,635.9277598 Here you are in this expansion I keep talking about and you were just deeply excited to get up and do what you do every day. 446 00:33:20,115.9277598 --> 00:33:22,215.9277598 Who doesn't want that? Right. 447 00:33:22,665.9277598 --> 00:33:36,15.9277598 So that being said, The inspiration, motivation, willingness to put yourself out there and tapping into a deep passion that comes along with discovering what you are really meant to do in this world. 448 00:33:36,405.9277598 --> 00:33:40,5.9277598 With your one and only very precious life. 449 00:33:40,455.9277598 --> 00:33:42,735.9277598 That is a next level experience. 450 00:33:42,915.9277598 --> 00:33:44,325.9277598 And I want you to have that. 451 00:33:45,75.9277598 --> 00:33:52,455.9277598 And I mean this so wholeheartedly when I say that I want you to feel that that is possible because it is. 452 00:33:53,205.9277598 --> 00:33:58,485.9277598 And guess what, when you do that, other people will feel it too, because there is no denying it. 453 00:33:59,25.9277598 --> 00:34:09,465.9277598 I can't tell you how many people who knew me, like pre parent loss and see what I'm doing now that have said things like Tara, you are, you are glowing. 454 00:34:09,525.9277598 --> 00:34:13,125.9277598 I can so see that this is what you were meant to be doing. 455 00:34:13,515.9277598 --> 00:34:15,645.9277598 You even look and sound different. 456 00:34:15,705.9277598 --> 00:34:19,5.9277598 Like you have totally found your calling and now you're answering it. 457 00:34:19,725.9277598 --> 00:34:33,105.9277598 However they say this to me, whether they're referring to coaching or this podcast, whatever it is, I have stepped into this new phase of my life and this new sense of self in such a way. 458 00:34:33,645.9277598 --> 00:34:35,715.9277598 That there is simply no going back. 459 00:34:36,345.9277598 --> 00:34:39,225.9277598 And I know you're capable of that too. 460 00:34:39,225.9277598 --> 00:34:42,165.9277598 And sometimes it does take losing a job. 461 00:34:42,675.9277598 --> 00:34:47,85.9277598 Or losing something big and profound at times for us to realize that. 462 00:34:47,625.9277598 --> 00:34:50,415.9277598 So, yes, I'm being that friend right now. 463 00:34:50,415.9277598 --> 00:34:52,785.9277598 That's encouraging you to see this hardship. 464 00:34:53,175.9277598 --> 00:34:59,895.9277598 As an opportunity for personal growth for self-reflection and for exploring new opportunities. 465 00:35:00,735.9277598 --> 00:35:05,355.9277598 Take a beat and enjoy the break, even if it's only a small one, right. 466 00:35:05,355.9277598 --> 00:35:06,795.9277598 You might not be unemployed forever. 467 00:35:06,795.9277598 --> 00:35:07,185.9277598 Okay. 468 00:35:07,875.9277598 --> 00:35:10,935.9277598 And also explain this to friends and family. 469 00:35:10,935.9277598 --> 00:35:16,815.9277598 If you have to like, I, in some ways I feel like we really don't owe anyone anything. 470 00:35:16,815.9277598 --> 00:35:17,85.9277598 Right. 471 00:35:17,85.9277598 --> 00:35:17,865.9277598 It's our life. 472 00:35:18,435.9277598 --> 00:35:25,605.9277598 But I know the responsibilities of life and family and everything under the sun often comes first. 473 00:35:25,605.9277598 --> 00:35:27,195.9277598 And that is absolutely okay. 474 00:35:27,255.9277598 --> 00:35:27,855.9277598 Of course. 475 00:35:28,365.9277598 --> 00:35:36,525.9277598 But you are a massive part of that foundation of your family and you need to be okay and fulfilled and happy too. 476 00:35:36,705.9277598 --> 00:35:38,685.9277598 So always remember that. 477 00:35:39,75.9277598 --> 00:35:40,785.9277598 Put your mental and physical health. 478 00:35:41,85.9277598 --> 00:35:42,105.9277598 At the forefront. 479 00:35:42,675.9277598 --> 00:35:44,115.9277598 Have fun networking. 480 00:35:44,115.9277598 --> 00:35:55,305.9277598 Uh, upskill the heck out of yourself, learn new things, learn about yourself and keep that positive mindset going my friend, because it is so powerful. 481 00:35:55,695.9277598 --> 00:36:00,615.9277598 And whether you stay in a similar job or industry that you just left, or you seek out a new one. 482 00:36:01,155.9277598 --> 00:36:05,595.9277598 I have zero doubt that you will find exactly where you are meant to be. 483 00:36:06,105.9277598 --> 00:36:12,615.9277598 All you need to do is know that in the fibers of your being, that you are capable of that too. 484 00:36:13,515.9277598 --> 00:36:13,815.9277598 All right. 485 00:36:13,815.9277598 --> 00:36:15,15.9277598 So those are my closing. 486 00:36:15,345.9277598 --> 00:36:18,375.9277598 Inspirational words on this topic today. 487 00:36:18,915.9277598 --> 00:36:23,655.9277598 With all of that being said, thank you so much for hanging out with me in this episode today. 488 00:36:23,985.9277598 --> 00:36:37,695.9277598 If this topic resonated with you or perhaps you think someone in your life could use it, I would deeply appreciate you sharing this episode or the podcast and passing it along so I can continue bringing more conversations about. 489 00:36:37,695.9277598 --> 00:36:43,455.9277598 Uh, life with grief and all this entails and coping tools like this, to those who need it. 490 00:36:43,605.9277598 --> 00:36:48,615.9277598 So I am super grateful for you being here and I will see you in the next episode. 491 00:36:50,265.9277598 --> 00:36:53,865.9277598 I am sending you a huge thank you for tuning into today's episode. 492 00:36:53,895.9277598 --> 00:36:54,375.9277598 My friend. 493 00:36:54,735.9277598 --> 00:36:55,995.9277598 I'm so grateful you're here. 494 00:36:55,995.9277598 --> 00:36:58,485.9277598 And for the steps you were taking to heal your heart. 495 00:36:58,845.9277598 --> 00:36:59,685.9277598 Open your mind. 496 00:36:59,955.9277598 --> 00:37:08,145.9277598 Fulfill your soul learn, grow, and evolve and move through this crazy thing called life in big, beautiful, impactful ways. 497 00:37:08,715.9277598 --> 00:37:10,575.9277598 Visit losses become gains.com 498 00:37:10,575.9277598 --> 00:37:11,355.9277598 for my blog. 499 00:37:11,625.9277598 --> 00:37:20,865.9277598 Ways to work with me to shop my daily journal and so much more, and be sure you're following along on Instagram and Facebook at life with grief podcast. 500 00:37:21,265.9277598 --> 00:37:26,155.9277598 I love seeing new faces, meeting new people, hearing your stories and supporting you. 501 00:37:26,185.9277598 --> 00:37:27,145.9277598 However I can. 502 00:37:27,655.9277598 --> 00:37:29,65.9277598 Be sure to hit that subscribe button. 503 00:37:29,65.9277598 --> 00:37:33,355.9277598 If you haven't already, if you haven't left a rating or review, please do so. 504 00:37:33,355.9277598 --> 00:37:34,615.9277598 I would so appreciate it. 505 00:37:34,915.9277598 --> 00:37:40,225.9277598 Or if you feel so inclined to share this episode or this podcast with someone who could use it too. 506 00:37:40,915.9277598 --> 00:37:42,445.9277598 I'll catch you in the next episode.
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