Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
This is the life with grief podcast.
The podcast that talks about and normalizes the complexities of grief life after loss and all this entails and so much more.
I want you to think of this podcast as a safe space, where I'm a friendly face, and we're just journeying through this together to figure out how to live life with our grief in tow.
(00:22):
I'm your host, Tara Acardo.
I'm a grief and transformational life coach, and I'm here to serve you.
Guidance, support, tangible coping tools, inspiration, and some laughs along the way to help you cultivate a more meaningful, intentional, and beautiful life.
But grieving or not, we're getting into countless topics here on the podcast from coping with loss to self-development and so much more.
(00:46):
I'm so grateful.
You're here.
Let's dive right in.
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Hey guys, welcome back to the life with grief podcast.
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I'm your host, Tara Acardo.
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And today I wanted to dig into a type of loss that often isn't really discussed or acknowledged in the way that I feel it should be at least.
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And that is the loss of a job.
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We talk a lot about death and the loss of a loved one on this podcast.
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But today.
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I wanted to pivot because this has really sort of been on my heart lately.
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I've seen it a lot kind of around on LinkedIn and just, I felt like it was a really important topic that we hadn't talked about it on the podcast yet today.
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So.
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That being said, the approach I want to take with this episode is to not only validate and hold a space to acknowledge how difficult this type of loss is and talk about ways to cope with this, the best that we can.
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Of course.
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But I want to take it a step further and touch on how this type of loss can affect our psyche and our self-worth.
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And to build on that, we'll finish it out with how we can reframe our mindset.
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If this does happen to us.
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And how we can move forward from there with a renewed sense of hope and purpose.
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So I wanted to kick off this episode today by first, just acknowledging job loss.
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Like I said, holding space for this and giving some credit where credit is due here, losing a job is hard and let's be real.
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Whether it's one you genuinely enjoy or one, you were sort of, kind of meh about.
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The shock, the discomfort.
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The anxiety, the worry that this can cause is undeniable for most of us, at least.
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And let's be real.
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The most stress inducing aspect of losing a job for many of us is probably the need for a stable income to support yourself or your family.
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We all got bills to pay, right.
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That probably goes without saying.
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So no matter how we might feel about our job, the feeling of comfort and, you know, bringing home that paycheck is perhaps close to number one in terms of why we even have a job in the first place.
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And hopefully it's also doing something we enjoy, but that being said, I wanted to just share an interesting statistic.
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According to an article from zippier 65% of at least United States workers are happy with their job, but only 20% consider themselves passionate about their jobs.
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And likewise, only 49% of American workers report being quote, very satisfied with their work.
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Well, 30% are just somewhat satisfied.
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So think about that for a moment.
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Where do you feel like you fall here? And there's really, this is not a trick question.
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It's just whatever you're feeling.
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But I just wanted to set the stage and get your mind going a little bit for a later part of the discussion that we'll be getting into that I think is really important in terms of discovering work and a job that we genuinely love.
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So.
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As far as witnessing job loss, you might be like, Tara, who are you to speak on this topic? I have personally seen job loss in two ways in my life.
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And of course see people on social media and people that I work with and people on LinkedIn, you know, so many of us struggle with this type of loss as well.
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Of course.
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One situation for me was when I was let go from a company that I was with for nearly eight years.
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And another situation was a company where I witnessed others losing their jobs.
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And I'll get into this more in a moment.
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But just to set the scene.
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I had been working for this same large company for almost eight years in.
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Different positions.
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I loved this company.
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I enjoyed the work I did for this company.
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That current position I was in when this happened was a little emotionally and physically taxing, not going to lie because I had to get up really early some mornings, like I'm talking 4:00 AM some days to get to the location.
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So basically I was a brand manager and I did merchandising and all of that had to happen in the morning before the store opened.
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And honestly, despite the early mornings, I really loved it.
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Long story short, this particular store I was working in was not doing the best financially.
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It was in a mall that had just really suffered in foot traffic in the years, leading up to it.
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And it was affecting our sales goals pretty badly.
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And so fast-forward.
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When I was let go, the store ended up closing probably four to five months later, if that, but at the time, my position was eliminated due to various reasons.
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And all of a sudden, my time at this company overall that I had spent so much of my.
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My twenties.
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And even before that, with.
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Ended it ended just like that.
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As another example of seeing some job loss around me, a company I had previously worked for face some financial woes, especially coming out of COVID.
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And they had to cut a slew of people over the span of about six months.
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I was fortunate in that I did not lose my role in this company, but some dear colleagues of mine did.
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And.
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Needless to say some took it.
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Well, some did not.
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But one interesting thing that I realized in that transition was this.
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The people that were more satisfied in their job and connected to the company or the people or the work or that it just been there a long time.
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Took the news harder than those who weren't as satisfied and hadn't been there as long, or they weren't as emotionally invested in the company.
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And for the, for those that were, I saw the effect that it had on them.
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Some somewhat from a distance.
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I might've seen something on social media that they posted.
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And in some cases I saw that firsthand.
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But either way, truthfully, it was, it was just sad to watch.
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You could tell that the wind had just been taken.
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Out of their sails a little bit.
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And also they were just now.
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Very stressed, you know, like, okay, what am I going to do next? And.
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It made me realize.
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How we truly mourn the loss of a job or a role.
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At a company that we so love, or we mourn the fact that we're not near these, you know, co-workers that really become more like family and it's, it can happen at the drop of a hat.
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So, there could be a slew of reasons of why the loss of a job could be difficult to cope with.
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So let's get some of these out in the open really quick and just validate some of these stressors here.
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If this is where you're at today.
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Like I've been saying, number one, financial stress and worry.
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As I mentioned, this is one of the primary difficulties of losing a job.
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Of course, it's this immediate impact on your financial stability.
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And the sudden loss of income can lead to, you know, financial strain, difficulty just meeting daily expenses, paying bills, feeding ourselves, or our family.
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Potentially potentially phasing.
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You know, the risk of debt or eviction, the list goes on.
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Number two though, again, kind of digging deeper into this type of loss.
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Your loss of identity or routine or emotional.
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Attachment that you had to this job or this company.
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And losing a job often means we have a daily routine of some sorts and we have the sense of purpose it for a lot of us.
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It gives us a reason to get up and get out of bed in the morning.
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And especially if you didn't see.
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It coming this, like I said, it can happen very suddenly, which is rightfully very shocking.
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And many people strongly identify with their professions and they derive a sense of identity, accomplishment, and fulfillment.
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From their work.
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And especially if someone has been with a company for many years, this can be especially hard to grapple with.
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And I know two people actually that come to mind, one in my family.
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And one I previously worked with that took months.
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I mean, seriously months to fully recover from losing a job that they had for eight years and over 20 years, respectively.
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So when a job is lost.
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It can disrupt a person's sense of self and purpose.
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It can lead to feelings of confusion and.
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You know, loss, obviously in a lack of direction.
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And additionally, I see a lot of people who feel that they are.
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Quote older in their career.
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This is their words.
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Not mine.
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Or, you know, they're just further along in there.
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Work experience.
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And there's often a concern that it will affect their chances or ability to get rehired.
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And as much as I always wish, you know, they didn't feel this way.
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Sadly.
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I understand it.
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It's so valid age discrimination is still very rampant.
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It's a totally valid concern for the record.
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I think there is a place for everyone in the workplace.
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Okay.
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Like I would be remiss if I did not call this out because.
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It's completely understandable how they feel.
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I just feel like we can make space for everyone no matter where they are at.
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In their number of years.
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On this earth.
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Okay.
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I just want to put that out there so we can do better.
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We can do so much better where that's concerned.
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But number three here as to why job loss can be hard, social isolation and emotional attachment to their colleagues.
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I've mentioned this already, but you know, work often provides a social network of sorts and a sense of belonging.
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Particularly when you really enjoy your colleagues.
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Some of us might gonna despise her colleagues.
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I get that.
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But suddenly being separated from coworkers that we might really, you know, have come to love.
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Or the work setting that we're in that can be incredibly hard.
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And losing a job can cause this undeniable.
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And sudden disconnection from our coworkers and, you know, work-related social interactions and this isolation can contribute to a lot of feelings of loneliness.
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And a loss of a support system, often for so many of us, you know, especially one of us or nine to five or, work.
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Roughly 40 hours a week or something we're spending just as much, if not more time.
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At working with these other people than we are at home sometimes, which I think is so sad, but.
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That's neither here nor there.
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But either way, this makes the situation even more challenging to navigate.
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And a fourth point here is we can have concern over career setbacks.
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So I know I kind of mentioned age here, but regardless of age, in this particular point, Losing a job can bring a lot of fear and concern for what is next in our careers.
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Gaps in employment.
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And a job loss on a resume can sometimes raise concerns for potential employers and make it more difficult to find and secure employment.
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And for those of us who lost a job, this can lead to of course, a prolonged job search added stress because of this.
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A sense of uncertainty about our professional future.
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More on this later though.
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So hang with me.
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And another point I just want to make here is the effect that a job loss can have on our relationship.
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Financial strain and emotional distress resulting from job loss can really take a toll on relationships with our family, with our friends, with our loved ones.
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With a partner, of course.
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And that added pressure.
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And changes in lifestyle can lead to it can lead to conflict.
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It can lead to tension.
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And just overall this need to readjust priorities and expectations.
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And again, sometimes that can happen very quickly, especially if.
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You are let go from a position very suddenly.
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So.
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I'll finish out these points with just, you know, the sixth thing that it can be so difficult with job loss.
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It's just the emotional distress of it.
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All.
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It can be very emotionally taxing.
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It can trigger a range of negative emotions.
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Like I said, you know, shock.
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Disbelief sadness, anger, frustration, anxiety.
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Fear of an uncertain future and especially coupled with the somewhat unfair, in my opinion, stigma, that's associated with unemployment and that can lead.
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Of course to a decline in self-esteem in some cases, a lack of confidence and just.
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Our overall wellbeing.
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So with that, all being said, just again, to validate and get all of that out in the open.
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Where do we go from here? How do we begin to make sense of all of this? How do we cope with this new reality that we find ourselves in? Figure out what all of this means for us.
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And find out what our future holds.
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Let's get into that next.
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Oh, Real quick interruption here, and then we'll get back to this episode.
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If you are someone who is experiencing some form of loss and are trying to navigate the complexities of grief, which you likely are in some capacity, if you've stumbled upon this podcast, then this message is for you.
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If you haven't heard about my intentional life after loss membership and community yet, this is truly something you need to check out.
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This membership is here to guide you into living a deeper, more meaningful and full life after experiencing loss.
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Who doesn't want that? Right? I created this membership because I know what it's like to navigate and cope with grief on a daily basis.
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I know how hard that can be and I know the tools and support it takes to do this effectively.
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I've done the work myself and I've coached people just like you to do the same.
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It comes down to having impactful, effective resources and tools at your disposal, having the right support around you from people who can understand and empathize with your grief, and having encouragement and inspiration around you consistently to not only elicit and spark change, but to keep it and keep the positive momentum going.
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Enrollment opens once a month for a limited time.
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Check out the details linked in the description.
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And I hope to see you in there.
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Oh, so let's now talk about coping.
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With this job loss, but more importantly, just finding a way.
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Forward.
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So in terms of how we can cope with this.
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Number one first and foremost.
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Allow yourself to grieve.
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Allow yourself to grieve this just as we would, the death of a loved one.
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You know, this is often the more accepted quote unquote type of grief that people are quicker to acknowledge.
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The loss of a job that deserves to be grieved as well.
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So acknowledge your feelings and give yourself permission to mourn this loss, because it is a loss that deserves to be mourned.
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It deserves that time and attention.
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It's natural to feel a range of emotions here, but processing them properly.
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That is an essential step toward healing from this.
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Sudden.
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Unexpected reality that we might find ourselves in.
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Second thing here is to seek support.
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This is so important if there was ever a time when we need emotional support, of course, outside of the death of a loved one or some other major loss.
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It's now it's a time when we are feeling pressure from countless directions.
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Uh, emotionally and financially, of course, often being the most prominent.
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Um, so I just want to encourage you.
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Don't be afraid to lean on and reach out to family, friends, or a supportive network who can provide, you know, just comfort and understanding or direction, right.
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Or can at least calm me down a little bit.
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When, when you need it.
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And when in doubt.
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I also want to implore you seek out counseling or maybe even like a business or a career coach.
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And yes, I know a coach can cost money that you might not feel that you have right now, but.
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If you can swing it.
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I really recommend this because the doors that it can unlock for you can be really incredible.
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Not only just for, for you and your mental health, but.
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It could be beneficial to you and your longterm career.
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Right.
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And if who knows, you could end up making more money, you could go in a different direction that you've never.
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Even considered.
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So in some of these cases, you know, think about it as an investment.
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Right.
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Like, who knows what you could discover with working with a professional like that, but either way sharing your feelings and your experience with others who.
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Perhaps have gone through a similar situation or maybe they haven't, but they can at least empathize and give you the right type of help that you need.
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That can help you gain some perspective and just offer you some valuable support when you need it.
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The most.
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Another thing here.
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Take care of yourself.
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I hope this goes without saying, but a shocking number of people don't prioritize this.
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So focus on self care.
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Engage in those activities that help you relax.
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And relieve that stress and I'm not going to get too far into self care here.
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I know that's like a very.
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High-level term.
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But, you know, whatever this means for you.
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Yes.
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Maybe it does mean you just treat yourself and you go get that massage that you've been putting off for so long, but it could also just mean, Getting out an exercise and getting some fresh air.
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You know, maintaining just a healthy diet.
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That is important.
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I know like those things don't always associate with.
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Loss, especially that have a job.
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You're like, I don't need to be eating healthy.
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I need to be on the job hunt.
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Like.
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Take it down a second, take a beat, making sure you are getting enough sleep and that you are taking care of your mental and physical health.
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That is really important.
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And yes, short you can job hunt your heart out and update your resume and your LinkedIn.
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And all of the good things, but you've got to make sure that you were taking care of.
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All of the above, right.
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It's just about a good balance.
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Another thing you can do here is to create a plan.
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Of course, right? This is one of the first things you can do.
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If this ever happens.
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And if the loss of a job ever happens to you.
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Think about this as taking intentional, productive steps each and every day.
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Right? So I don't want you doing this in a way that is going to overwhelm you.
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Just do this in a way.
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That's like, if you can put your head on your pillow that night and know that you did all that you could do that day.
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And feel good about it.
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That's a step in the right direction.
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So whether this is scouring job sites and doing research on what's out there and, you know, making a note of which ones you might be interested in applying for.
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Updating your resume, securing references, maybe even researching an entirely new career and what it would take.
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To get into that.
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Networking either virtually or in person loading up on training opportunities to boost your skills.
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All of the above is great.
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So developing a plan of action to move forward.
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However that looks to you.
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But doing this in manageable chunks.
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So you don't overwhelm yourself and an already very overwhelming situation, right? Like, please remember.
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Job loss can be it's a lot, you know, this, if you ever have, or are going through this.
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So.
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I want you to like give yourself time and space and grace.
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To honor that.
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But also, you know, this creating a plan.
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It can be a very empowering thing to do too.
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So I encourage you have some fun with it.
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Don't put this crazy amount of pressure on yourself.
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And I just want to interrupt myself here too.
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All of that being said, every all of those action steps I just talked about.
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Please know and remember it's okay.
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To just take a day, take a morning, take an afternoon.
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Just.
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Take a break too Drop your shoulders.
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Do some breath work.
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And just allow yourself to just be, I understand the pressure of feeling the need to like get on it and get on another job.
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I want to validate that.
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And absolutely, of course that's important.
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Especially if we have other mouths to feed, like.
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I hear you, right? This is all easier said than done.
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But also use this opportunity for this break and unemployment too.
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To reset a little bit too.
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And I just want to bike mentioned this as well.
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I, at one point with someone who was a hiring manager, On a digital marketing team.
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And even if someone had a gap in their resume, At least on our team.
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If we saw that they were doing supplemental projects or trainings or certifications or something on the side, That for us, at least was a really great sign.
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And that typically impressed us and it kind of softened the blow of like any little gap or a lapse in resume because.
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People have all kinds of reasons for being unemployed, especially if it is for, you know, maybe a little bit of a bigger or a prolonged period of time.
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A lot of employers might be more understanding of a period of unemployment than you might think.
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And listen, some might not be right, but like I said, I think many understand that life and company changes happen.
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And of course, if you get an interview or you.
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Or writing a cover letter or something that you might have an opportunity to explain some of this, but in my point of view, if you show a willingness to take the bull by the horns and learn and grow, as you're finding your way, and as you're finding this new job, How could they not give you some credit for that? Right.
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How could they not be impressed a little bit that at least shows that at least shows you're trying.
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And I, like I said, I know it's hard to communicate that sometimes if it's just in a very generic application situation, that's maybe all online, but however, you might be able to note that supplemental learning or training that you're doing get scrappy, find a way to do that.
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And also of course, hopefully this goes without saying, but following up with.
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HR.
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If the company has an HR department or a hiring department, whatever, once you apply.
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Definitely a good call.
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But regardless setting really specific realistic goals, having little steps that you're going to take each day, maybe like thinking about that, writing that out.
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And actually taking those steps towards those things can help you regain a sense of control and purpose.
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And take a little bit of that overwhelm out of it because you're being super strategic with it.
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And again, you are setting those intentional actions and you're doing them, you're doing the damn thing.
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So listen, you're working towards something that's beautiful.
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That deserves to be celebrated.
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Another aspect of this is to reflect.
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And reevaluate.
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This is my favorite part of the process.
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I cannot recommend enough.
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Using this transition period to reflect on your career goals, your values and your aspirations, and a great way to do this is to consider what you enjoyed about your previous job and what you might want in your future career.
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Use this as an opportunity to reevaluate your skills, your strengths, and maybe some areas for development.
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And as I said, it could be a chance to explore a new possibilities or make a career change too.
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Right.
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So more coming up on this a minute, when we are going to talk about reframing our mindset, but.
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First, I just wanted to share something really quick with you.
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Earlier I mentioned, I was let go from the company that I had been with for eight years.
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Just after that happened and mind you, I live in Northern California.
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So wine industry is big out here.
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But my dad was actually temporarily moving back to the east coast for work and he was going to drive across the us to do that.
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So I went with him part of the way we drove through California and Arizona and New Mexico.
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And then I flew home from there.
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And on that trip down, we were talking a lot about just where I saw my career going, you know, great father, daughter talk.
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And something that really came to me was teaching English.
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And my cousin had actually done this somewhere in Asia.
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And so I was kind of picking his brain about it and there was just something about it that really resonated with me.
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So I started doing research actually on that trip, but then I came home and I started doing more.
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And before I knew it, I got a job in the wine industry.
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So I completely pivoted from retail, like fashion, retail.
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To the wine industry.
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I got a job in a tasting room.
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And that was really fun.
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I really enjoyed that.
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And I, in the meantime, And this feels a little slimy saying this now, but as I was working for them, I was also looking at ways at making my dream come true of living in Italy, at least for a few months, however long I could.
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And.
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And I did that.
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And in that time, I not only totally changed careers and changed jobs into something that I actually really enjoyed for the time that I had it, but I was doing something and I was working towards something that I was so excited about and I knew it was going to change my life and it was going to open new doors.
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And be such an adventure.
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And I think it was maybe.
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10 or 11 months later, I made the move to Italy.
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I went and I got my it's a T E F L certification that teaching English as a foreign language.
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Certification.
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00:26:53,5.9277598 --> 00:26:54,205.9277598
I got that in Florence.
357
00:26:54,415.9277598 --> 00:26:54,985.9277598
From there.
358
00:26:54,985.9277598 --> 00:26:58,555.9277598
I got a job in Rome, teaching English to the Italian military.
359
00:26:59,65.9277598 --> 00:27:02,905.9277598
I never ever would have envisioned any of that for myself.
360
00:27:03,235.9277598 --> 00:27:06,745.9277598
Nor would I have ever felt that that was a possibility.
361
00:27:06,745.9277598 --> 00:27:08,305.9277598
It wouldn't have even crossed my mind.
362
00:27:08,695.9277598 --> 00:27:11,65.9277598
Had this job loss not happened.
363
00:27:11,455.9277598 --> 00:27:14,275.9277598
So I just tell you this story.
364
00:27:14,815.9277598 --> 00:27:21,265.9277598
You know, hopefully to inspire you just a little bit, but also just as a Testament to, you never know.
365
00:27:21,685.9277598 --> 00:27:24,295.9277598
What opportunities are going to knock on your door.
366
00:27:24,295.9277598 --> 00:27:28,585.9277598
But of course, we also have to make it happen for ourselves too, you know, had I not.
367
00:27:29,185.9277598 --> 00:27:35,545.9277598
I just had gotten, you know, any old other job or whatever, and not kind of taking that time to explore.
368
00:27:35,695.9277598 --> 00:27:39,685.9277598
Yeah, I never would have made it to Italy, which is my dream country.
369
00:27:39,715.9277598 --> 00:27:45,985.9277598
I hope to move back there one day with my husband and my daughter, now that they have citizenship and I'm going to be working on mine.
370
00:27:45,985.9277598 --> 00:27:46,435.9277598
So.
371
00:27:47,5.9277598 --> 00:27:49,165.9277598
It's just, it's just a story.
372
00:27:49,165.9277598 --> 00:27:50,485.9277598
It's just my experience.
373
00:27:50,485.9277598 --> 00:27:56,415.9277598
But again, it's just an example of an opportunity that can come your way.
374
00:27:56,715.9277598 --> 00:28:04,545.9277598
When you really allow yourself that time and that opportunity to get to know yourself again and what you really want out of life.
375
00:28:04,765.9277598 --> 00:28:10,135.9277598
So that all being said, I want you to remember two important things here before we wrap up this episode.
376
00:28:10,885.9277598 --> 00:28:14,845.9277598
Number one, losing a job can feel like a setback for sure.
377
00:28:15,235.9277598 --> 00:28:19,135.9277598
But it does not define your worth or future success.
378
00:28:19,705.9277598 --> 00:28:26,965.9277598
First of all, I believe in you, you have that in me, my friend, but I want you to believe in yourself too.
379
00:28:27,245.9277598 --> 00:28:30,155.9277598
That is where the magic and motivation will happen.
380
00:28:30,155.9277598 --> 00:28:32,495.9277598
And that's where those things ultimately come from.
381
00:28:32,945.9277598 --> 00:28:34,295.9277598
No one can do that for us.
382
00:28:34,355.9277598 --> 00:28:37,295.9277598
No one can give us that other than us.
383
00:28:37,715.9277598 --> 00:28:43,295.9277598
And believe that with the right effort and mindset and putting your desires out into the universe.
384
00:28:43,565.9277598 --> 00:28:45,155.9277598
With the right action steps.
385
00:28:45,305.9277598 --> 00:28:49,565.9277598
You can recover from whatever this drug loss looks like for you.
386
00:28:49,955.9277598 --> 00:28:53,765.9277598
And find new opportunities that align with your goals and aspirations.
387
00:28:53,765.9277598 --> 00:28:57,845.9277598
And maybe there are things that you haven't even explored or thought of yet.
388
00:28:58,685.9277598 --> 00:28:59,705.9277598
And number two.
389
00:29:00,125.9277598 --> 00:29:04,685.9277598
Despite this current challenge, remember that losing a job is not.
390
00:29:05,225.9277598 --> 00:29:09,395.9277598
Necessarily a reflection of your worth or abilities.
391
00:29:09,875.9277598 --> 00:29:12,395.9277598
I want it also interject by saying that sometimes.
392
00:29:12,785.9277598 --> 00:29:19,145.9277598
As I mentioned, in my example from earlier, it is simply about the company and the status of that.
393
00:29:19,145.9277598 --> 00:29:20,735.9277598
And not you.
394
00:29:21,275.9277598 --> 00:29:24,125.9277598
I cannot tell you how many companies I have heard about.
395
00:29:24,125.9277598 --> 00:29:34,805.9277598
And we're a part of that, of how to let people go because of financial hardship, especially after COVID-19 and sometimes whatever the circumstances, it just comes with the territory.
396
00:29:35,435.9277598 --> 00:29:39,185.9277598
Is this fair? No, it sure does not always feel that way.
397
00:29:39,275.9277598 --> 00:29:50,765.9277598
And remember, some employers are really pained to have to eliminate positions if that's the case, but it's really just a matter of what they can afford and what they have to do at that point.
398
00:29:51,485.9277598 --> 00:29:54,665.9277598
I have totally been there, but think about it too.
399
00:29:54,995.9277598 --> 00:29:59,345.9277598
If this company can't afford you or see the value in your work.
400
00:29:59,735.9277598 --> 00:30:03,35.9277598
It might be time to find someone who can and who does.
401
00:30:03,395.9277598 --> 00:30:03,815.9277598
Right.
402
00:30:04,835.9277598 --> 00:30:09,215.9277598
So this leads me to just a quick conversation on reframing our mindset.
403
00:30:09,845.9277598 --> 00:30:15,665.9277598
While job loss can feel really devastating, highly stressful, and an absolute gut punch.
404
00:30:16,55.9277598 --> 00:30:21,335.9277598
If you are there today, I want for you to open your mind to the possibility that this can present.
405
00:30:21,695.9277598 --> 00:30:23,165.9277598
New opportunities.
406
00:30:23,645.9277598 --> 00:30:30,95.9277598
Just like in my early example and my story about how getting fired ultimately led to one of the greatest adventures.
407
00:30:30,425.9277598 --> 00:30:32,855.9277598
And career shifts I could have ever asked for.
408
00:30:33,965.9277598 --> 00:30:34,205.9277598
No.
409
00:30:34,205.9277598 --> 00:30:34,595.9277598
Yes.
410
00:30:34,655.9277598 --> 00:30:39,5.9277598
I know you might hear this all the time and people coming in from left and right.
411
00:30:39,5.9277598 --> 00:30:42,785.9277598
Telling you to stay positive and look on the bright side and it'll all be okay.
412
00:30:43,595.9277598 --> 00:30:47,975.9277598
We don't need to douse this experience with toxic positivity.
413
00:30:48,455.9277598 --> 00:30:50,75.9277598
And those platitudes.
414
00:30:50,225.9277598 --> 00:30:56,495.9277598
Sometimes we just need to sit there in our fields and be like, well, this absolutely socks.
415
00:30:56,765.9277598 --> 00:30:57,65.9277598
Right.
416
00:30:57,575.9277598 --> 00:30:58,805.9277598
But hear me out on something.
417
00:30:59,435.9277598 --> 00:31:01,445.9277598
This might be a little woo.
418
00:31:01,565.9277598 --> 00:31:02,645.9277598
What I'm about to say.
419
00:31:03,155.9277598 --> 00:31:04,895.9277598
But I want for you to consider.
420
00:31:05,345.9277598 --> 00:31:09,665.9277598
That there could be some higher power working in your favor.
421
00:31:09,695.9277598 --> 00:31:14,285.9277598
I just crack open that door for a second and open your mind to that right now.
422
00:31:14,315.9277598 --> 00:31:15,695.9277598
That is all I want you to do.
423
00:31:16,565.9277598 --> 00:31:16,925.9277598
Why.
424
00:31:17,435.9277598 --> 00:31:26,945.9277598
Because with adversity comes, growth comes learning and evolutions beyond our wildest dreams or expectations.
425
00:31:27,395.9277598 --> 00:31:34,535.9277598
There might be something bigger and better for you out there that you don't even know or see yet, but it's trying to make its way to you.
426
00:31:34,835.9277598 --> 00:31:36,995.9277598
You just have to open yourself up to it.
427
00:31:37,265.9277598 --> 00:31:43,805.9277598
And believe it's coming and welcome it with open arms and sometimes the losing of a job.
428
00:31:44,705.9277598 --> 00:31:48,665.9277598
Can lead us to that, that opens us up to that expansion.
429
00:31:49,505.9277598 --> 00:31:51,815.9277598
So just give that some consideration.
430
00:31:51,815.9277598 --> 00:32:02,765.9277598
If this is something you are going through, or if you ever do at some point, even if it's not a job loss, I would love for you to just keep this in mind all day, every day, because I genuinely.
431
00:32:03,185.9277598 --> 00:32:04,85.9277598
Think it's true.
432
00:32:04,995.9277598 --> 00:32:08,895.9277598
And in terms of finding our purpose throughout all of this.
433
00:32:09,585.9277598 --> 00:32:12,915.9277598
I'll be really blunt had my mom and dad not died.
434
00:32:12,975.9277598 --> 00:32:17,685.9277598
I likely would have never been in the Greek space doing the work that I'm doing now.
435
00:32:17,715.9277598 --> 00:32:18,585.9277598
Being a coach.
436
00:32:19,155.9277598 --> 00:32:23,985.9277598
And in this grief space though, I have found my purpose hands down.
437
00:32:24,255.9277598 --> 00:32:27,525.9277598
My purpose, my Derma, my calling, whatever you want to call it.
438
00:32:28,275.9277598 --> 00:32:34,695.9277598
I personally feel that I have found what I am no doubt meant to be doing with my life.
439
00:32:35,25.9277598 --> 00:32:38,475.9277598
Healing coaching, serving and supporting.
440
00:32:38,925.9277598 --> 00:32:44,685.9277598
And I've also found an insanely awesome group of people, many of which I now consider to be good friends.
441
00:32:45,225.9277598 --> 00:32:53,265.9277598
In this space that are highly supportive and amazing and funny and wonderful that I never would have found otherwise.
442
00:32:54,255.9277598 --> 00:32:57,915.9277598
When, you know, in your heart, you're being called to do something else.
443
00:32:58,665.9277598 --> 00:33:03,465.9277598
There's nothing like it it's simply doesn't feel like work.
444
00:33:03,825.9277598 --> 00:33:11,685.9277598
You feel fulfilled, inspired, motivated in alignment with what you are supposed to be doing with your life.
445
00:33:11,685.9277598 --> 00:33:19,635.9277598
Here you are in this expansion I keep talking about and you were just deeply excited to get up and do what you do every day.
446
00:33:20,115.9277598 --> 00:33:22,215.9277598
Who doesn't want that? Right.
447
00:33:22,665.9277598 --> 00:33:36,15.9277598
So that being said, The inspiration, motivation, willingness to put yourself out there and tapping into a deep passion that comes along with discovering what you are really meant to do in this world.
448
00:33:36,405.9277598 --> 00:33:40,5.9277598
With your one and only very precious life.
449
00:33:40,455.9277598 --> 00:33:42,735.9277598
That is a next level experience.
450
00:33:42,915.9277598 --> 00:33:44,325.9277598
And I want you to have that.
451
00:33:45,75.9277598 --> 00:33:52,455.9277598
And I mean this so wholeheartedly when I say that I want you to feel that that is possible because it is.
452
00:33:53,205.9277598 --> 00:33:58,485.9277598
And guess what, when you do that, other people will feel it too, because there is no denying it.
453
00:33:59,25.9277598 --> 00:34:09,465.9277598
I can't tell you how many people who knew me, like pre parent loss and see what I'm doing now that have said things like Tara, you are, you are glowing.
454
00:34:09,525.9277598 --> 00:34:13,125.9277598
I can so see that this is what you were meant to be doing.
455
00:34:13,515.9277598 --> 00:34:15,645.9277598
You even look and sound different.
456
00:34:15,705.9277598 --> 00:34:19,5.9277598
Like you have totally found your calling and now you're answering it.
457
00:34:19,725.9277598 --> 00:34:33,105.9277598
However they say this to me, whether they're referring to coaching or this podcast, whatever it is, I have stepped into this new phase of my life and this new sense of self in such a way.
458
00:34:33,645.9277598 --> 00:34:35,715.9277598
That there is simply no going back.
459
00:34:36,345.9277598 --> 00:34:39,225.9277598
And I know you're capable of that too.
460
00:34:39,225.9277598 --> 00:34:42,165.9277598
And sometimes it does take losing a job.
461
00:34:42,675.9277598 --> 00:34:47,85.9277598
Or losing something big and profound at times for us to realize that.
462
00:34:47,625.9277598 --> 00:34:50,415.9277598
So, yes, I'm being that friend right now.
463
00:34:50,415.9277598 --> 00:34:52,785.9277598
That's encouraging you to see this hardship.
464
00:34:53,175.9277598 --> 00:34:59,895.9277598
As an opportunity for personal growth for self-reflection and for exploring new opportunities.
465
00:35:00,735.9277598 --> 00:35:05,355.9277598
Take a beat and enjoy the break, even if it's only a small one, right.
466
00:35:05,355.9277598 --> 00:35:06,795.9277598
You might not be unemployed forever.
467
00:35:06,795.9277598 --> 00:35:07,185.9277598
Okay.
468
00:35:07,875.9277598 --> 00:35:10,935.9277598
And also explain this to friends and family.
469
00:35:10,935.9277598 --> 00:35:16,815.9277598
If you have to like, I, in some ways I feel like we really don't owe anyone anything.
470
00:35:16,815.9277598 --> 00:35:17,85.9277598
Right.
471
00:35:17,85.9277598 --> 00:35:17,865.9277598
It's our life.
472
00:35:18,435.9277598 --> 00:35:25,605.9277598
But I know the responsibilities of life and family and everything under the sun often comes first.
473
00:35:25,605.9277598 --> 00:35:27,195.9277598
And that is absolutely okay.
474
00:35:27,255.9277598 --> 00:35:27,855.9277598
Of course.
475
00:35:28,365.9277598 --> 00:35:36,525.9277598
But you are a massive part of that foundation of your family and you need to be okay and fulfilled and happy too.
476
00:35:36,705.9277598 --> 00:35:38,685.9277598
So always remember that.
477
00:35:39,75.9277598 --> 00:35:40,785.9277598
Put your mental and physical health.
478
00:35:41,85.9277598 --> 00:35:42,105.9277598
At the forefront.
479
00:35:42,675.9277598 --> 00:35:44,115.9277598
Have fun networking.
480
00:35:44,115.9277598 --> 00:35:55,305.9277598
Uh, upskill the heck out of yourself, learn new things, learn about yourself and keep that positive mindset going my friend, because it is so powerful.
481
00:35:55,695.9277598 --> 00:36:00,615.9277598
And whether you stay in a similar job or industry that you just left, or you seek out a new one.
482
00:36:01,155.9277598 --> 00:36:05,595.9277598
I have zero doubt that you will find exactly where you are meant to be.
483
00:36:06,105.9277598 --> 00:36:12,615.9277598
All you need to do is know that in the fibers of your being, that you are capable of that too.
484
00:36:13,515.9277598 --> 00:36:13,815.9277598
All right.
485
00:36:13,815.9277598 --> 00:36:15,15.9277598
So those are my closing.
486
00:36:15,345.9277598 --> 00:36:18,375.9277598
Inspirational words on this topic today.
487
00:36:18,915.9277598 --> 00:36:23,655.9277598
With all of that being said, thank you so much for hanging out with me in this episode today.
488
00:36:23,985.9277598 --> 00:36:37,695.9277598
If this topic resonated with you or perhaps you think someone in your life could use it, I would deeply appreciate you sharing this episode or the podcast and passing it along so I can continue bringing more conversations about.
489
00:36:37,695.9277598 --> 00:36:43,455.9277598
Uh, life with grief and all this entails and coping tools like this, to those who need it.
490
00:36:43,605.9277598 --> 00:36:48,615.9277598
So I am super grateful for you being here and I will see you in the next episode.
491
00:36:50,265.9277598 --> 00:36:53,865.9277598
I am sending you a huge thank you for tuning into today's episode.
492
00:36:53,895.9277598 --> 00:36:54,375.9277598
My friend.
493
00:36:54,735.9277598 --> 00:36:55,995.9277598
I'm so grateful you're here.
494
00:36:55,995.9277598 --> 00:36:58,485.9277598
And for the steps you were taking to heal your heart.
495
00:36:58,845.9277598 --> 00:36:59,685.9277598
Open your mind.
496
00:36:59,955.9277598 --> 00:37:08,145.9277598
Fulfill your soul learn, grow, and evolve and move through this crazy thing called life in big, beautiful, impactful ways.
497
00:37:08,715.9277598 --> 00:37:10,575.9277598
Visit losses become gains.com
498
00:37:10,575.9277598 --> 00:37:11,355.9277598
for my blog.
499
00:37:11,625.9277598 --> 00:37:20,865.9277598
Ways to work with me to shop my daily journal and so much more, and be sure you're following along on Instagram and Facebook at life with grief podcast.
500
00:37:21,265.9277598 --> 00:37:26,155.9277598
I love seeing new faces, meeting new people, hearing your stories and supporting you.
501
00:37:26,185.9277598 --> 00:37:27,145.9277598
However I can.
502
00:37:27,655.9277598 --> 00:37:29,65.9277598
Be sure to hit that subscribe button.
503
00:37:29,65.9277598 --> 00:37:33,355.9277598
If you haven't already, if you haven't left a rating or review, please do so.
504
00:37:33,355.9277598 --> 00:37:34,615.9277598
I would so appreciate it.
505
00:37:34,915.9277598 --> 00:37:40,225.9277598
Or if you feel so inclined to share this episode or this podcast with someone who could use it too.
506
00:37:40,915.9277598 --> 00:37:42,445.9277598
I'll catch you in the next episode.