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January 16, 2024 130 mins

Noodles make me really horny. If that sounds like you, you might be Juzo Itami, director of the 1985 "Ramen Western" movie Tampopo. See, it's like spaghetti, but Japan. We have a stoic cowboy hero trucker and his twink son on their travels to find MILFs to tutor in the way of the noodle. Our MILF is a lady named Tampopo, a widow tasked his running her late husband's ramen shop, but she unfortunately sucks shit at making noodles. Only a trucker in a cowboy hat, a homeless chef, a not homeless chef, and a creepy handyman could possibly resolve this. This is a movie ultimately about food. There are many ways to enjoy food and only about 90% of those involve weird food sex. Our main plot is interrupted with vignettes about various people enjoying food, which sent both Hope and Blaze insane. They hated them a lot. They wanted to just get back to the cowboy plot. Frosty, however is a freak. A weird little noodle freak.

 

Hey, if you're my brother and you're reading this, you might want to skip out on this one.

 

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